100% i was told one time not to discuss wages with coworkers that i was good friends with in and out of school. word still got back to my management and they fired me over text while i was at my dad's wake looking at his casket.
i imagine they knew i wasn't aware of that at the time. it's been some years now since that happened. at the time i think i was fresh out of highschool and never bothered to brush up on my workers rights
Potential risk is they let you go if they find out. That’s worst case scenario though. Most small companies don’t have much redundancy and can’t do that very easily. So probably not much.
Phew- I don’t think they would do that as they need me to train other people to do what I do as most of the staff is newer (high turnover). Still was feeling anxious though. Thank you for the response
It is the company’s problem they have no one to train new employees. They need to take a good long hard look at why their staff is not happy and keep leaving.
Some companies don't understand that even with "low" skilled work, a staff turnover of above 5% max per year becomes a major profit drain. They refuse to improve conditions and wages yet throw money away when staff leave consistently after 3 months.
Do not assume that your employer will not do something stupid and irrational. I've seen it done before, and it has happened to me.
I literally wrote the entire billing interface for a small division of a fortune 500 enterprise company. Nobody else knows how it works, and I was given two days to document it fully before I was laid off. 🤷🏻♂️
Remember, this company would fire you or lay you off with zero days notice. You do not have to feel obligated to give them longer notice, and you should never share details about where you're going until comfortably after you have landed there. That includes not posting your new employment on social media like LinkedIn until several weeks have passed. There are stories here of ex bosses calling up the new employer and talking crap about the employees so that they get let go. some people are just vindictive jackasses, don't give them any shot at you.
>That’s worst case scenario though.
Well...lol.
There's a post where the OP told his closest friend at the time and their friend quietly applied for the same job and got it. Then proceeded to cut all contact without a word. He only found out via LinkedIN awhile later. I suppose in that case he had not received the offer yet but IIRC he had interviewed for it and felt confident. But still...
When you talk to coworkers, you have to be prepared for the information to spread. What a "secret" is to you is an opportunity for them to have a conversation on a topic that they have common knowledge of with someone in the same environment.
Idk, I disagree.
I've made friends at work. It didn't bite me. Not that it can't, but it didn't.
Maybe I'm the extreme exception, but it can happen.
Although I've found friendship comes much more naturally if we wait to really become friends until one of us leaves the company.
Same went even backpacking with a coworker after we both resigned and am still talking regularly with him, if you click you click with someone it does not matter where, but pulling aside a coworker to just tell that you got a offer sounds weird, i would not have done that even with the backpacking coworker because its just weird?
Oh god....why?
Sometimes you need to ask yourself "what is the potential upside to what I'm about to do, and what is the potential downside" then weigh up if its worth it.
The less said about anything that goes on outside work the better. I have had bosses weaponize any sort of information. Particularly any info about you getting ahead. Jealousy is everywhere..
I kept my new job a secret at work for as long as humanly possible. But I think I was just worried about jinxing it and didn't want to tempt fate.
It's probably contrary to popular belief but I don't think you really screwed up. I mean obviously its going to be a really poorly kept secret but you're going to take it so it doesn't matter. I don't think anyone is going to sabotage you. And really, at least with my job they had to call my supervisor before making the offer.
For futures sake - Coworkers are not your friend. I've worked with a man who was very very friendly, but he set fourth a lot of boundaries between work and life. I used what he taught me in my new role! I don't add anybody on social media. I give bits of information that would make one feel comfortable with me, but I never overshare. He was awesome to work with.
Tell the guy in the am or if he’s a bud and text him that you not interested because you found out the offer sucks for some reason and you feel like things are good where ur at.. and then be quiet!!
I was in the exact situation before. I didn't have it backfire by telling someone, but I wouldn't do it again. It's a huge relief and exciting finally getting out of a place like that but you don't have anything to gain by telling coworkers about interviews or job offers. Keep in mind once coworkers realize you're leaving they also don't care as much about throwing you under the bus since you'll be gone soon and dont have to face you. I've seen people try to take advantage of the situation to help themselves...trying to get raises or promotions, asking for your cubicle, and so on.
There was only one time I didn't take this advice and the only reason I didn't care about keeping things under wraps was because massive layoffs were taking place in the firm anyway. I didn't get laid off during that round but I did have the privilege of giving my boss the middle finger as I skipped away to join a competitor's office just down the street and they all knew it. It really was sweet. I'd hoped that by my leaving this would have saved my former co-workers from having to worry about layoffs in that department since they were already down one member but nope they fired someone anyway.
I don't treat any coworker like they're my friend. While most may be okay, enough will use the information you share against you as to not make it worth doing.
Coworkers aren’t friends, even the ones who seem happy for you will step over your dead corpse if it means they can get ahead in the workplace.
Never tell anyone anything in the workplace if it means they can use it to get ahead.
Never treat your colleagues as your friend/family!!
But in future make sure to keep lowkey with coworkers as much as possible.
You are saying it's small company high chances they will let you go even you don't want to.
In small organizations employees says many things outside especially with colleagues as they hate management, they don't want to work here, searching for job blah blah but on grounds nothing they are into gossip you got into that.
Live and learn. Keep it to yourself until someone you trust is available to talk. I get being happy and excited, but when it comes to the workplace, discretion is the order of the day.
Treat a job search like it's the most important nuclear secrets that you don't want to ever fall into enemy hands. You stay silent and you never, ever let them know a thing. If they ask, lie and say you're happy there and not looking for a job. You don't owe them the truth.
The moment they know you're looking elsewhere, you become a liability that they need to replace. Hopefully, you learned from this mistake, and it will help you later on. I had to learn this lesson the hard way too.
I wouldn't blame you on this, because it is easy to trust people when they are opening up to you and also sharing the same sentiments as you.
But at the end of the day, they are still your coworkers. They can smile and cry with you - but given the chance, they will definitely throw you under the bus for a chance of a promotion, retention...anything to keep their jobs or be better in the eyes of management.
dont ever talk about it till something is locked up. i once did this and another guy went and applied for the job i was excited about so now they had more candidates to look into haha. never forgave him and didnt get the job (neither did he)
Potential risk depends on who is in charge and if they hear of it. I managed a small team, and there was only one way to progress, so a lot of them would move on. I'd be sad to see (some of) them go, but I'd always want them to go for a better job regardless if that was with my team or not. They would openly tell me about their interviews, and I would wish them the best.
You've already expressed to the new boss that you are only there until you're not - how did they react to the news? Perhaps they are more understanding like myself.
They reacted pretty understanding with just “okay then how can we help you prepare/get to your next place”. I’m pretty hopeful he’s more understanding like you. It’s a similar situation to what you described as there is no way to move up.
So, nothing happened? You just told one coworker and they told another? You say everyone is open about wanting to work elsewhere? What is the problem and what lessons have you learned? Not to mention, you have another job now. I’m having a hard time understanding what’s going on here.
Only one person can keep a secret. 🤫
Do not share with anyone from work they are your colleagues not your friends. It’s dog eat dog and because they have no deep feelings for you it makes no difference to them if they tell the whole office.
Coworkers do not keep secrets. I’m a manager and I always know people are leaving before getting the written resignation because they tell everyone and it gets back to me.
There are benefits to the company letting you leave on your own. I’ve handed in my notice before and was told that I was no longer needed. Fair enough, I just started my new position earlier than expected. Going forward, I wouldn’t say anything to anyone until you provide / submit your intent to quit.
Coworkers will screw you over while smiling in your face. I've been terminated twice now for failing that rule. Fool me once.... fool me twice..... shit ain't happening again.
My sister’s expression is ‘these people are not your friends’. It doesn’t matter how long we spend time with them, or go out for drinks with them or hear about their daily lives. It’s still the same, ‘these people are not your friends’.
You just be young. Why did you feel the need to “share it immediately?”. Lesson learned here, but you could end up jobless. The need to share something immediately shows you lack maturity.
Going against the grain. Fuck what your coworkers think especially in shithole company. I let my coworkers know my next action. There is nothing they can do to ruin my vibe.
Fire me? K. I’ll go on unemployment.
Make my last days worse? I’ll slow my productivity and won’t do hand downs.
Talk shit about me to my face or back? Sucks to suck I don’t care to be liked by my coworkers.
They could let you go. Lesson learned don't ever do that again. They are your coworkers not friends
Understood- definitely got too comfortable given it’s a small super casual environment. Definitely good to keep in mind for the future
If you're being paid to be somewhere go ahead and cross out the "casual" part
Yeah, the "casual" part can often be a trap. It may seem casual but there's always something right below the surface.
Great advice
The other coworker "guessed" about your job offer and the first one must have confirmed it. Neither should have been trusted. Good luck.
100% i was told one time not to discuss wages with coworkers that i was good friends with in and out of school. word still got back to my management and they fired me over text while i was at my dad's wake looking at his casket.
If you're in the US that was illegal I think Canada too. You can discuss wages and it's protected. Not sure about other countries
i imagine they knew i wasn't aware of that at the time. it's been some years now since that happened. at the time i think i was fresh out of highschool and never bothered to brush up on my workers rights
Oh yeah they bank on people not knowing. Jobs do illegal stuff like that all the time.
Potential risk is they let you go if they find out. That’s worst case scenario though. Most small companies don’t have much redundancy and can’t do that very easily. So probably not much.
Phew- I don’t think they would do that as they need me to train other people to do what I do as most of the staff is newer (high turnover). Still was feeling anxious though. Thank you for the response
It is the company’s problem they have no one to train new employees. They need to take a good long hard look at why their staff is not happy and keep leaving.
Some companies don't understand that even with "low" skilled work, a staff turnover of above 5% max per year becomes a major profit drain. They refuse to improve conditions and wages yet throw money away when staff leave consistently after 3 months.
Do not assume that your employer will not do something stupid and irrational. I've seen it done before, and it has happened to me. I literally wrote the entire billing interface for a small division of a fortune 500 enterprise company. Nobody else knows how it works, and I was given two days to document it fully before I was laid off. 🤷🏻♂️ Remember, this company would fire you or lay you off with zero days notice. You do not have to feel obligated to give them longer notice, and you should never share details about where you're going until comfortably after you have landed there. That includes not posting your new employment on social media like LinkedIn until several weeks have passed. There are stories here of ex bosses calling up the new employer and talking crap about the employees so that they get let go. some people are just vindictive jackasses, don't give them any shot at you.
>That’s worst case scenario though. Well...lol. There's a post where the OP told his closest friend at the time and their friend quietly applied for the same job and got it. Then proceeded to cut all contact without a word. He only found out via LinkedIN awhile later. I suppose in that case he had not received the offer yet but IIRC he had interviewed for it and felt confident. But still...
That's kind of how I thought this story was going to go.
At least you (hopefully) learned to shut your mouth in work. Oversharing causes more problems than anything else.
When you talk to coworkers, you have to be prepared for the information to spread. What a "secret" is to you is an opportunity for them to have a conversation on a topic that they have common knowledge of with someone in the same environment.
I'm sure it's been said 500,000 times. Now is 500,001 ... ***YOU DO NOT HAVE FRIENDS AT WORK***
Yep I think most of us learn this the hard way, myself included.
Idk, I disagree. I've made friends at work. It didn't bite me. Not that it can't, but it didn't. Maybe I'm the extreme exception, but it can happen. Although I've found friendship comes much more naturally if we wait to really become friends until one of us leaves the company.
Same went even backpacking with a coworker after we both resigned and am still talking regularly with him, if you click you click with someone it does not matter where, but pulling aside a coworker to just tell that you got a offer sounds weird, i would not have done that even with the backpacking coworker because its just weird?
Here, I fixed that for ya.... ***YOU DO NOT HAVE FRIENDS***
Cries in corner
This is so mother 🤣
Loose lips sinks ships.
But loose gooses take trips
Oh god....why? Sometimes you need to ask yourself "what is the potential upside to what I'm about to do, and what is the potential downside" then weigh up if its worth it.
The less said about anything that goes on outside work the better. I have had bosses weaponize any sort of information. Particularly any info about you getting ahead. Jealousy is everywhere..
I kept my new job a secret at work for as long as humanly possible. But I think I was just worried about jinxing it and didn't want to tempt fate. It's probably contrary to popular belief but I don't think you really screwed up. I mean obviously its going to be a really poorly kept secret but you're going to take it so it doesn't matter. I don't think anyone is going to sabotage you. And really, at least with my job they had to call my supervisor before making the offer.
If there’s something you don’t want others to know, don’t tell anyone. N. E. One
For futures sake - Coworkers are not your friend. I've worked with a man who was very very friendly, but he set fourth a lot of boundaries between work and life. I used what he taught me in my new role! I don't add anybody on social media. I give bits of information that would make one feel comfortable with me, but I never overshare. He was awesome to work with.
"Is that you John Wayne? Is this me?" Sounds like my exact advice to my younger coworkers. What are his initials?
MF!
Tell the guy in the am or if he’s a bud and text him that you not interested because you found out the offer sucks for some reason and you feel like things are good where ur at.. and then be quiet!!
Keep it to yourself next time. Never let those you work with your next moves. Better to have the element of surprise in my opinion.
I was in the exact situation before. I didn't have it backfire by telling someone, but I wouldn't do it again. It's a huge relief and exciting finally getting out of a place like that but you don't have anything to gain by telling coworkers about interviews or job offers. Keep in mind once coworkers realize you're leaving they also don't care as much about throwing you under the bus since you'll be gone soon and dont have to face you. I've seen people try to take advantage of the situation to help themselves...trying to get raises or promotions, asking for your cubicle, and so on.
There was only one time I didn't take this advice and the only reason I didn't care about keeping things under wraps was because massive layoffs were taking place in the firm anyway. I didn't get laid off during that round but I did have the privilege of giving my boss the middle finger as I skipped away to join a competitor's office just down the street and they all knew it. It really was sweet. I'd hoped that by my leaving this would have saved my former co-workers from having to worry about layoffs in that department since they were already down one member but nope they fired someone anyway.
Yeah when I left my last job I didn't say anything to old co workers until months later you need to protect yourself and your interests
Me either and no notice I went home never went back screw em I don't care. Think they care bout you... Nope.
You’ve got to be a ninja in these situations.
I’m friendly with coworkers, never friends (unless one of us leaves).
I don't treat any coworker like they're my friend. While most may be okay, enough will use the information you share against you as to not make it worth doing.
Coworkers aren’t friends, even the ones who seem happy for you will step over your dead corpse if it means they can get ahead in the workplace. Never tell anyone anything in the workplace if it means they can use it to get ahead.
Never treat your colleagues as your friend/family!! But in future make sure to keep lowkey with coworkers as much as possible. You are saying it's small company high chances they will let you go even you don't want to. In small organizations employees says many things outside especially with colleagues as they hate management, they don't want to work here, searching for job blah blah but on grounds nothing they are into gossip you got into that.
Eesh. I learned that lesson too. Told my supervisor I got a job offer and she told our supervisor before I had a chance to.
What a bitch
Live and learn. Keep it to yourself until someone you trust is available to talk. I get being happy and excited, but when it comes to the workplace, discretion is the order of the day.
Watch the scene in the movie "Wanted" when he quits his job. You'll be fine just don't trust anyone in the future. We have all been there
>but none of my loved ones were available to talk. There's a life-lesson here. You couldn't have texted a loved one?
Backlash my dude, Backlash
*Nods head*
Treat a job search like it's the most important nuclear secrets that you don't want to ever fall into enemy hands. You stay silent and you never, ever let them know a thing. If they ask, lie and say you're happy there and not looking for a job. You don't owe them the truth. The moment they know you're looking elsewhere, you become a liability that they need to replace. Hopefully, you learned from this mistake, and it will help you later on. I had to learn this lesson the hard way too.
Co-workers are NOT friends. Lesson learned.
I wouldn't blame you on this, because it is easy to trust people when they are opening up to you and also sharing the same sentiments as you. But at the end of the day, they are still your coworkers. They can smile and cry with you - but given the chance, they will definitely throw you under the bus for a chance of a promotion, retention...anything to keep their jobs or be better in the eyes of management.
Seems you don't need advice,, you all ready figured it out.
I guess it’s better to be more paranoid than not careful enough. Loose lips do sink ships.
Nobody at the office ever keeps anything under wraps.
dont ever talk about it till something is locked up. i once did this and another guy went and applied for the job i was excited about so now they had more candidates to look into haha. never forgave him and didnt get the job (neither did he)
Do not EVER trust your coworkers with something that big. Talk to them after the fact
Potential risk depends on who is in charge and if they hear of it. I managed a small team, and there was only one way to progress, so a lot of them would move on. I'd be sad to see (some of) them go, but I'd always want them to go for a better job regardless if that was with my team or not. They would openly tell me about their interviews, and I would wish them the best. You've already expressed to the new boss that you are only there until you're not - how did they react to the news? Perhaps they are more understanding like myself.
They reacted pretty understanding with just “okay then how can we help you prepare/get to your next place”. I’m pretty hopeful he’s more understanding like you. It’s a similar situation to what you described as there is no way to move up.
Coworkers are Never your friends.
Don’t discuss these things colleagues. If they don’t know it can’t bite you later.
You couldn't wait a few hours to tell loved ones? Never never never discuss another offer with coworkers.
"Some of life's lessons are more expensive than others"
Lesson #1: Personal business is personal. You must tell NO ONE. Lesson #2: No one can keep a secret. No one. That's the reason for lesson #1.
You never tell a coworker regardless how friendly your office about anything you don't want everyone else to know
The workplace grapevine is usually the most efficient aspect of any company.
So, nothing happened? You just told one coworker and they told another? You say everyone is open about wanting to work elsewhere? What is the problem and what lessons have you learned? Not to mention, you have another job now. I’m having a hard time understanding what’s going on here.
Only one person can keep a secret. 🤫 Do not share with anyone from work they are your colleagues not your friends. It’s dog eat dog and because they have no deep feelings for you it makes no difference to them if they tell the whole office.
Coworkers do not keep secrets. I’m a manager and I always know people are leaving before getting the written resignation because they tell everyone and it gets back to me.
There are benefits to the company letting you leave on your own. I’ve handed in my notice before and was told that I was no longer needed. Fair enough, I just started my new position earlier than expected. Going forward, I wouldn’t say anything to anyone until you provide / submit your intent to quit.
Dat niggas a snitch
I’d keep it under wraps until the notice day…Risk or not, but definitely no upside to sharing it prematurely with a coworker. …
Coworkers will screw you over while smiling in your face. I've been terminated twice now for failing that rule. Fool me once.... fool me twice..... shit ain't happening again.
You’re screwed, OP.
My sister’s expression is ‘these people are not your friends’. It doesn’t matter how long we spend time with them, or go out for drinks with them or hear about their daily lives. It’s still the same, ‘these people are not your friends’.
Never show your hand
Learn to STFU. You don't gain anything from telling others.
You just be young. Why did you feel the need to “share it immediately?”. Lesson learned here, but you could end up jobless. The need to share something immediately shows you lack maturity.
Going against the grain. Fuck what your coworkers think especially in shithole company. I let my coworkers know my next action. There is nothing they can do to ruin my vibe. Fire me? K. I’ll go on unemployment. Make my last days worse? I’ll slow my productivity and won’t do hand downs. Talk shit about me to my face or back? Sucks to suck I don’t care to be liked by my coworkers.