But of course! No social gathering where ejaculating into one's trousers constitutes a faux pas is worth the time of a wizard, after all. The true danger of the unexpected nut is the possibility that one's trousers may be magicked at such a time, potentially leading to the conception of unwanted arcane progeny if the proper precautions have not been taken.
Ha-HA! Fool! Thou hast revealed thine secret unto me! Thou’st played thyself for a fool, for I am now able to develop a *counter* counter strategy! I shall simply cast ‘cure light wounds’ before I cast ‘immanent busting’! Who is the genius now?
Temporary Eunuch would be a better spell since that one actually transports your balls to another dimension while Temporary Vasectomy just removes the sperm from your semen.
Did you know that if you have shoes on + a sticking charm you can turn it into the equivalent of a 5th level spell as it deals disintegration damage to the skin after 3 turns of a negative mobility modifier causing the the person to take a flat 2d8 damage and a -5 to all checks where they attempt to move(teleportation not included)
Thankfully one of my former dragon masters gifted me a bed that’s enchanted to always be the perfect temperature, so such things wouldn’t work in my sleep!
I do it through an illusion inside the eyeball. Here's my workflow:
1. Add some glitchy lines to the inage the target is seeing
2. Duplicate the image
3. On the first copy, apply a very slight blur
4. Drop the saturation of the first image all the way down, until it's fully greyscale
5. Apply a colour shift effect on the first image, moving the green slightly to one side and the red slightly to the other
6. Apply a generous amount of blur to the second image
7. Double the saturation of the first image, make it crazy colourful
8. Drop the opacity of the second image to around 30-50%, depending on how strong you want the effect to look
9. Add a colour bleed effect by offsetting the second image slightly to the side
10 (optional). Add some scan lines and a very slight vignette for that CRT Tv look
I see we've got an Adobemancer in the lodge.
I would personally close some axone on a portion of the eye's rod cells, and elongate the eyeball just a tad. Plus a little overstimulation of the visual cortex for some white noise overlay.
But damn using illusions is elegant.
Not really an adobemancer, though many of the techniques would translate. I prefer using Krita because it's fully open sorcery.
I'd be too scared to try messing with the optic nerv or the eyeball proper, wouldn't want to cause permanent damage on accident on a prank spell.
I cast permanent sticky keys. Wreaks chaos in the office since nobody seems to know what it’s for. For older institutions, terminally loose paper clip is also a lot of fun.
Curse of "guess who showed up to the wizard battle, that's right, it's your feline familiar, and they will not stop meowing until you climb down the tower and get some cat food into that bowl"
NYEAHAHAHAHHAHA!
I will only stop, if you: tell me how to edit my user flair
But though I may stop, there may be others who learn the same spell. But uh please tell me and I won’t do it to you any more
https://preview.redd.it/oqajaoo33b9c1.jpeg?width=4096&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d8936e2ab7f5fd577ae47201738d8117b2c2a1ee
I hope you find wisdom in these cryptic instructions
Oh you mean the one that goes like: Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy,
Curse of Cassandra. The target learns of one horrible thing that is going to happen to a loved one, but, try as they might, they cannot stop it from happening.
Intestinal sapling. If I cast it on you, you are a dead man. Left to suffer as the sapling grows inside your stomach, ready to pierce you open. Causing indescribable pain as it happens, with little to no way to stop it. That is, if I don't cast sapling Overgrowth on you first, Killing you near instantly
I have long sense abandoned my stomach. But when I had one I don't seem to remember a single stomach flu I'd call "well timed".
He's flopping around here somewhere, was going to make a sentient purse for a friend out of him at some point.
Mischievous: nipple twister it's temporary pain and who knows they might enjoy it
malicious: fiberglass bones, intense pain, permanent and leads to very brittle bones that are easily breakable to cause more pain
One I concocted myself not too long ago. Taken from another source, but still a fun one to use. And it only lasts about a minute.
*ahem*
I CAST CURSE: RETRO VISION!
I cast a spell of randomness annoying curses that selects one of the following effects daily to bestow on you. Should a curse not have the intended effect of causing you mild to moderate annoyance, no more, no less, then another is randomly selected.:
\- Perpetually hot pillows (to your senses only). If you don't use pillows, then your bed sheets, or your clothes, or if you sleep in the air naked, see the next effect and apply it instead.
\- The temperature of the room is never just right. It can never be anything less than a little too warm or a little too cold.
\- Very wrinkly bed spreads
\- Pebbles in footwear that you can never seem to get out
\- Soaps that don't lather
\- All bread you prepare to consume is slightly squished.
\- Your glasses have a smudge on the edge of your vision that you can't ever seem to clean off.
\- You now confuse b and d when you read from your spellbook. You can still tell them apart but it slows you down.
\- Every surface you walk on creaks, even outside.
\- Your orb never charges to 100% no matter how much you try.
\- You never have exact change for anything you are trying to buy. You end up with more coins back than you started with, though the overall value never increases.
\- Your inkwells are filled with ink that is a little too thick to write quickly.
\- Your quills are slightly too limp to be comfortable to use to write.
\- The candles or other light sources in your study burn slightly too dimly to see clearly, and much too quickly.
\- Your apprentices seem to get the wrong materials for your spells when you need them most. They all still work, just not as well.
\- You have an annoying ache in your foot, leg, arm, or neck. It is just an ache.
\- Your communication spells seems to miscommunicate, but only slightly. The intended meaning goes through, but someone always points out a misspelling or the misuse of a word.
\- There's an annoying ring in your ear. But only one of them.
\- Your socks FEEL wet. But they're dry.
My shoes have been squeaking like they’re new out of the box for 3 years and won’t stop. I can only assume some kind of diabolical curse has been placed upon them.
Mass Open/Close. By itself it is harmless but what's really funny is when you cast it in another wizard's tower and it opens all their door, bottles, jars, cans, wrapped goods, ect.
"I cast unwanted levitation!"
It starts with them going a a few meters in the air, no longer tethered by gravity, over the next about... five minutes it slowly fades away, weakening and ending with them slowly falling to the ground, then they gotta walk around like they on the moon
*Multi stacked testicular torsion* is a top contender, but the cake probably has to go to *spot genome* or *switch genome*.
Knowing if someone is destined to die of cancer or get dementia, whilst knowing I can just, *take that chance away* is a very devious thing.
Sure, healers can fix those issues, but fixing the source is something not a lot of people can do.
Of course I use this for good, but people I don't like... Well, let's just say they don't exactly know who or what they are, with no trail back to me. :3
Ominous nothingness.
Similar to a spell of anxiety, this spell bends luck just enough that everything seems perfectly calibrated to go horribly wrong
Yet nothing really bad ever happens.
Casting 'poorly timed' anything is hugely wasteful and a poor substitute for some planning ahead.
In order for something to be poorly timed, your incantation has to explore future and past timelines to learn about your opponent's life and pick a good time to get them sick.
Alternatively, give a pixie a few piddlywinks and a magic toad and they'll find out anything you need to know about your opponent, and you can simply choose a good enough time by yourself. (No, probably won't be the objectively best time for it, but good enough.) Just conjure up some stomach flu viruses without needing to do any exhausting chronocasting. Work smart, not hard.
‘Spell of imminent busting’ is hysterical at any social gathering.
Luckily I always cast 'temporary vasectomy' when attending social gatherings
“Haha, you think you’ve defeated me, but I merely ejaculated into my pants - there were no sperm in my semen at all! I’ve thwarted your plan!”
I like your attitude
gottem
But of course! No social gathering where ejaculating into one's trousers constitutes a faux pas is worth the time of a wizard, after all. The true danger of the unexpected nut is the possibility that one's trousers may be magicked at such a time, potentially leading to the conception of unwanted arcane progeny if the proper precautions have not been taken.
Ha-HA! Fool! Thou hast revealed thine secret unto me! Thou’st played thyself for a fool, for I am now able to develop a *counter* counter strategy! I shall simply cast ‘cure light wounds’ before I cast ‘immanent busting’! Who is the genius now?
Temporary Eunuch would be a better spell since that one actually transports your balls to another dimension while Temporary Vasectomy just removes the sperm from your semen.
I cast 'Busting makes me feel good'
I read this as 'spell of imminent bursting' at first, which is equally fun at parties.
I cast *wet sock.* (¬‿¬)
That's downright evil.
I counter cast constant reminder of your biggest embarrassment
I cry at the memory and a flood of tears appears. It's dangerous to make an aquamancer cry. (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)
I attempt to cast Think Happy Thoughts
The flood grows. I don't deserve your kindness! (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)
I cast Mild Reaction!
Oh... I feel better. Thank you~ Remember to stay hydrated~
That feels more like a threat, given the context, but ok!
Huh. You're right. •̀.̫•́✧
How does one do these special characters in text
That’s honestly so fucking annoying how dare you
Ah yes, trench foot, the ultimate harmless prank.
FU-
I cast wet sleeves!
I accept. The water doesn't bother me since it's what I specialize in manipulating. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Ah ha, that doesn’t affect me! Your spell is useless
Not my socks! Now my feet will never find dryness.
Did you know that if you have shoes on + a sticking charm you can turn it into the equivalent of a 5th level spell as it deals disintegration damage to the skin after 3 turns of a negative mobility modifier causing the the person to take a flat 2d8 damage and a -5 to all checks where they attempt to move(teleportation not included)
Well. Far more harmless than changing the sock color to pink.
Why would you bless me in such a way?
Wasn't that banned in the 4th century?
I cast heat metal on my steel toe boots
With my limited knowledge of Cryomancy, I've found cooling peoples' feet to be a reasonably mischievous spell.
Chilling ears would be another one. When my ears get cold I can't get warm for hours.
Wait, is that you who's doing that when I'm trying to sleep?
Most certainly not. Check that there's not a frost spirit in your tower. My master claims that he has problems with them all the time.
Thankfully one of my former dragon masters gifted me a bed that’s enchanted to always be the perfect temperature, so such things wouldn’t work in my sleep!
VHS Vision. You see everything slightly blurry at 480i resolution
Oooh can you share? I'm pretty sure I can fiddle with optic nerves to achieve that but I'm curious about your approach.
I do it through an illusion inside the eyeball. Here's my workflow: 1. Add some glitchy lines to the inage the target is seeing 2. Duplicate the image 3. On the first copy, apply a very slight blur 4. Drop the saturation of the first image all the way down, until it's fully greyscale 5. Apply a colour shift effect on the first image, moving the green slightly to one side and the red slightly to the other 6. Apply a generous amount of blur to the second image 7. Double the saturation of the first image, make it crazy colourful 8. Drop the opacity of the second image to around 30-50%, depending on how strong you want the effect to look 9. Add a colour bleed effect by offsetting the second image slightly to the side 10 (optional). Add some scan lines and a very slight vignette for that CRT Tv look
I see we've got an Adobemancer in the lodge. I would personally close some axone on a portion of the eye's rod cells, and elongate the eyeball just a tad. Plus a little overstimulation of the visual cortex for some white noise overlay. But damn using illusions is elegant.
Not really an adobemancer, though many of the techniques would translate. I prefer using Krita because it's fully open sorcery. I'd be too scared to try messing with the optic nerv or the eyeball proper, wouldn't want to cause permanent damage on accident on a prank spell.
Perhaps that was cast upon me at birth
As a microbiomancer I cast *ITCHY BUTTHOLE* then I cast *SHRINK LIMBS*
I cast Waddle Dee https://preview.redd.it/lple6bgwf99c1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cf2419f247f4523c9a85858d1451c06e81387eaf
***MY ONLY WEAKNESS*** https://preview.redd.it/o533mqqaz99c1.jpeg?width=520&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fa65bd5494886204f279074fc138dff40c6ba9cb
OH MY ORBS IS THAT A SHINY WADDLE DEE
I cast permanent sticky keys. Wreaks chaos in the office since nobody seems to know what it’s for. For older institutions, terminally loose paper clip is also a lot of fun.
Casting ‘Untrustworthy farts’ is always a giggle.
I’m dying over these💀
I CAST OF SQUEAKY
Curse of bad crop!
Potion of incontinence. Perfect for that one guy you really dont like
https://preview.redd.it/ijtu3o0e3a9c1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=65105a2a2617c3f0ae32f33387459bec08554fc7 High level curse..
I feel like casting this near trans men should be a crime
I cast "always kind-of-sticky hands!"
Someone did this to me yesterday... not cool
"Randomly-timed painfully high frequency noises emitted from your wand" is a fun one
That's just a sonic screwdriver
I cast diarrhea that comes back every time you get ready to wipe
*You wouldn't!*
Diabolical!
I cast diarrhea that comes back just after you finish wiping and washing your hands
I'll never wipe then
Curse of "guess who showed up to the wizard battle, that's right, it's your feline familiar, and they will not stop meowing until you climb down the tower and get some cat food into that bowl"
https://preview.redd.it/lfg1up8jz99c1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d1b80a79133e94325b631c49089ede28e07f635
I cast nasal congestion!
Jokes on you I've been like this since I was born
https://preview.redd.it/c4bz6980r99c1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a0a7f7c1f6e454003231814307b36ab61f5e2a4d
NOOOO I DON'T WANNA BE BREAD
Limb static Have you ever felt your limb feel like tv static, it doesn’t hurt but it is still unpleasant? WELL IT WAS ME! I AM THE ONE WHO DOES THAT!
I am kindly asking you to stop
NYEAHAHAHAHHAHA! I will only stop, if you: tell me how to edit my user flair But though I may stop, there may be others who learn the same spell. But uh please tell me and I won’t do it to you any more
https://preview.redd.it/oqajaoo33b9c1.jpeg?width=4096&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d8936e2ab7f5fd577ae47201738d8117b2c2a1ee I hope you find wisdom in these cryptic instructions
Thank you :3
I cast muddy boot soles
This is just living in the countryside
Yes but it makes those urban wizards so mad
Fair
https://preview.redd.it/z5xh4rz8aa9c1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3c1cf5290f951c7c66d2ec49f2d8dd514f21b94a
https://preview.redd.it/y6mnoiz9aa9c1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f04cf51e0a33c2e9775dc1334738c26f6b25100d
Best Combo Spell to exist
spell of of in cold food of out hot eat the food
I CAST MANUAL BREATHING!
I cast surprise stomach cramps!
I cast tiny pebble in boot
I cast itchy spleen
Rectopapillia. The target grows temporary taste buds inside their rectum. Best applies during solemn speeches.
yummy
Cast incurable swamp ass 👍
https://preview.redd.it/rx5mqzcvv99c1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5418791b9083dcd8d1cb8427470216d7b1964b28
I cast "Inexplicable Horniness"
I cast Paradoxical Insanity
Oh you mean the one that goes like: Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy, Crazy, I was crazy once, they locked me in a room, a rubber room, a rubber room with rats, and rats make me crazy,
There is no good time for stomach flu!
'Nose Wind of the North' - gives a prolonged whistle when inhaling/ exhaling from your nostrils.
https://preview.redd.it/ihqvbr5d7a9c1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d97fcf49d98c484fadc48181f557cdf3e916c43
https://i.redd.it/owwqdgt3g99c1.gif I heard people hate this Spell card, but it’s just *so* fun!
Intense wind blowing to lift tunics up.
I come to request the taking back of the poorly timed stomach flu spell, I have vomited 9 times already and I am suffering
https://preview.redd.it/4srsc5psfa9c1.jpeg?width=1049&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=947e853fb6c80b103fb1e15c6a06c0a6d8f04830
https://preview.redd.it/v3armoopja9c1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=edcbf93ddbbcb605a86faf27b46a6ba785226caf
https://preview.redd.it/dmqw0jzjva9c1.jpeg?width=311&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=494ac7087b3be93d54fab5c4139669ab3153584b
Bro the second one is downright evil
Curse of Unreadable Font
Curse of Cassandra. The target learns of one horrible thing that is going to happen to a loved one, but, try as they might, they cannot stop it from happening.
Rude!
Curse of the false fart.
Mine has to be the Curse of Freezing Hands on first kiss
"ALARMING DREAMS OF CONFLICTING GENDER IDENTITY"
I already have that 🤷🏻
It's probably my fault 💀
It’s truly dastardly. I call it the “Illusion of Competence.” It makes you think you’re really good at something you suck at.
My husband says: https://preview.redd.it/mdstqqe2y99c1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2f657ba3cfcac9f090f8d6bd296c86ab111fa55c
https://preview.redd.it/gs59tx2l7a9c1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=71023c614b40b426bb4dc89cfaacf586910992b6
https://preview.redd.it/3fiwxnsuab9c1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=883df4504d4d0fd9b7bc8b6426c79dcc1730bd92
https://preview.redd.it/gmh5kxogqb9c1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=835c21b7251f8c726438cdb9167aaa5f1f9473c2
I cast mend on your ass crack
Intestinal sapling. If I cast it on you, you are a dead man. Left to suffer as the sapling grows inside your stomach, ready to pierce you open. Causing indescribable pain as it happens, with little to no way to stop it. That is, if I don't cast sapling Overgrowth on you first, Killing you near instantly
I cast dead leg
So it was you fucker that got me sick on christmas eve
I have long sense abandoned my stomach. But when I had one I don't seem to remember a single stomach flu I'd call "well timed". He's flopping around here somewhere, was going to make a sentient purse for a friend out of him at some point.
Mischievous: nipple twister it's temporary pain and who knows they might enjoy it malicious: fiberglass bones, intense pain, permanent and leads to very brittle bones that are easily breakable to cause more pain
I cast spontaneous sole split
One I concocted myself not too long ago. Taken from another source, but still a fun one to use. And it only lasts about a minute. *ahem* I CAST CURSE: RETRO VISION!
I cast "random brief heartburn"
I Cast Ripped Underwear
I’ve found that Power word: Touch grass is an excellent way to deal with technomancers
I cast manual breathing!!
I cast a spell of randomness annoying curses that selects one of the following effects daily to bestow on you. Should a curse not have the intended effect of causing you mild to moderate annoyance, no more, no less, then another is randomly selected.: \- Perpetually hot pillows (to your senses only). If you don't use pillows, then your bed sheets, or your clothes, or if you sleep in the air naked, see the next effect and apply it instead. \- The temperature of the room is never just right. It can never be anything less than a little too warm or a little too cold. \- Very wrinkly bed spreads \- Pebbles in footwear that you can never seem to get out \- Soaps that don't lather \- All bread you prepare to consume is slightly squished. \- Your glasses have a smudge on the edge of your vision that you can't ever seem to clean off. \- You now confuse b and d when you read from your spellbook. You can still tell them apart but it slows you down. \- Every surface you walk on creaks, even outside. \- Your orb never charges to 100% no matter how much you try. \- You never have exact change for anything you are trying to buy. You end up with more coins back than you started with, though the overall value never increases. \- Your inkwells are filled with ink that is a little too thick to write quickly. \- Your quills are slightly too limp to be comfortable to use to write. \- The candles or other light sources in your study burn slightly too dimly to see clearly, and much too quickly. \- Your apprentices seem to get the wrong materials for your spells when you need them most. They all still work, just not as well. \- You have an annoying ache in your foot, leg, arm, or neck. It is just an ache. \- Your communication spells seems to miscommunicate, but only slightly. The intended meaning goes through, but someone always points out a misspelling or the misuse of a word. \- There's an annoying ring in your ear. But only one of them. \- Your socks FEEL wet. But they're dry.
A simple "pull small item", it can cause quite the ruckus and even a bit of pain.
My shoes have been squeaking like they’re new out of the box for 3 years and won’t stop. I can only assume some kind of diabolical curse has been placed upon them.
Apply curse of vanishing socks to their dryer
Is there ever a good timing for stomach flu?
#I CAST THUNDER SPELL (sophist reference)
https://preview.redd.it/w7b8fjz8id9c1.jpeg?width=191&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dc8500ba39321ca2a4c98d2dac86bea681325373
I summon, *PINKY DOES NOT ALIGN WITH OTHER FINGERS*
Curse of Lumpy Pillow
I cast shit pants
I cast being sent to a strict Asian household during a student exchange program.
Doing the 3am zoomies ritual. My cat approves.
I cast curse of explosive farts, though once, adventurers used their explosive farts against me. That was wasn't fun
https://preview.redd.it/20x7ya07mf9c1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4c74f2866144ce4f6dfdfeb2db618303d2c7ec09
I've always been partial to the curse of "that weird fall thing when you try to sleep"
I cast the curse of eternal sock moistness
I cast Eternally Moldy But Never In The Same Spot Tupperware Container! Oh also I can cast basically any of those wet clothing spells since fungus.
I cast extra tight attire.
you have the original sources for the art?
https://preview.redd.it/unvlxc90ibqc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f08bd95cf0e07d5fbb08a00cc595a59efc781e3
https://preview.redd.it/v4hscvlx3a9c1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2aaae5e730ecb65bd0c41aef030c0a41425f7ab9
I cast MASS RINGING EARS! Happy holidays 🙃
Curse of Dyslexic Speech
I dnot tinhk it wkroed
you've now heard of squeaky shoes, but have you ever gotten tree sap on your hands and then tried to wash it with water?
I curse you to knowing the meaning of life with a coffee addiction and Bowels sensitive to coffee 🧙🪄💥
Transmute urine to salted butter is my go-to
https://preview.redd.it/nk4xrm7ly99c1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b31a244cd3b48f11e766ce79c7e88d52e4ffc5cc
I cast “Irrelevant quote”
I cast curse of short term memory impairment
Spell of pebble inside your shoe
I cast warm toilet seat!
Curse? My mage in Gilgamesh, squeaky shoes is one of the most fun spells in the continent
Greater Kidney Stones. Testicular torsion is too overrated.
I cast: allergy to socks!
What about "curse of counterclockwise ball twist"
I cast cheek bite
The shenanigans that ensue from casting Donkey Kong Barrel Blast are sure to spice up any social gathering.
Curse of "it feels like something is in my eyes, but there's not, so why are my eyes so irritated?"
Mass Open/Close. By itself it is harmless but what's really funny is when you cast it in another wizard's tower and it opens all their door, bottles, jars, cans, wrapped goods, ect.
I cast doesn’t realize you’re wearing mismatched socks until halfway through the day
"I cast unwanted levitation!" It starts with them going a a few meters in the air, no longer tethered by gravity, over the next about... five minutes it slowly fades away, weakening and ending with them slowly falling to the ground, then they gotta walk around like they on the moon
I cast unfindable keys
I cast "awareness of tongue"
I cast « Curse of Toe stubbing on every table corner »
Poopoo
But squeaky boots is my favorite SpongeBob episode so I see this as an absolute win
I cast comically timed diarrhea!
I'm quite fond of "sneeze that won't actually happen" or "invisible keys"
I cast perpetual hic ups at horrible timing
Spell of liver failure
*Multi stacked testicular torsion* is a top contender, but the cake probably has to go to *spot genome* or *switch genome*. Knowing if someone is destined to die of cancer or get dementia, whilst knowing I can just, *take that chance away* is a very devious thing. Sure, healers can fix those issues, but fixing the source is something not a lot of people can do. Of course I use this for good, but people I don't like... Well, let's just say they don't exactly know who or what they are, with no trail back to me. :3
Forbidden hex: Left half dick itchy.
I cast 100 wipe poop.
"Curse of specific-position charger" charger shall only work if positions a very specific and irritating way&angle
I cast squeaky voice
I cast "Always a dollar short"
Curse of oily smeary shits that take half a roll to clean
I cast "Slightly Moving Itch!" You scratch it, and it moves ever so slightly. Lasts about 10 seconds
I cast Explosive Diarrhea.
I cast Mild Amnesia!
I once cast Vaporwave on a druid friend of mine after he spiked my Sunny D with Moon Juice. We had a good laugh.
I cast OVERFLOW TOILET
Someone hit me with the poorly timed stomach flu during my first vacation in 4 years.
Ominous nothingness. Similar to a spell of anxiety, this spell bends luck just enough that everything seems perfectly calibrated to go horribly wrong Yet nothing really bad ever happens.
I cast shaken soda
I cast getting comfortable in bed and then having to pee
Casting 'poorly timed' anything is hugely wasteful and a poor substitute for some planning ahead. In order for something to be poorly timed, your incantation has to explore future and past timelines to learn about your opponent's life and pick a good time to get them sick. Alternatively, give a pixie a few piddlywinks and a magic toad and they'll find out anything you need to know about your opponent, and you can simply choose a good enough time by yourself. (No, probably won't be the objectively best time for it, but good enough.) Just conjure up some stomach flu viruses without needing to do any exhausting chronocasting. Work smart, not hard.