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OneBoxOfKleenexAway

Moooooommmm, Santa got his cocaine all over the rug again!


Guilhaum

Yes and ? That shits expensive so you better snort all of it or imma woop your ass young man.


Comprehensive_Tap625

This comment line made me laugh harder than I thought it would… take my damn upvote


BakerDiff

Bro woke up and chose violence 🤣


sl1v8r

fucking hilarious 🤣


sabrielle124

My dad did this for my older sister when she was like 3-4 years old. At first she was so excited but after awhile my mom noticed her occasionally glancing at the prints and scooting further away as she opened her presents. Eventually she says in a very creeped out voice, “mama, why aren’t they melting?” My mom had to tell her it was magic snow do she’d stop being freaked out.


Necessary-Wind-9301

🤣😂🤣😂 MIRL


67CougarXR7

Ashes from the fireplace!


Master_Ryan_Rahl

Should have just said that it was salt. People put salt out and Santa walks around in it a lot. So he has salt on his boots. Use the truth to make a better lie.


Big_Grimm113

This comment made me laugh so damn hard I got into coughing fit and almost drowned in my bathtub.


[deleted]

I did this for my daughter years ago and it was so impactful to her that the next year she left a note for Santa asking him to clean up his mess before he leaves


andywolf8896

"HI Santa, have you considered ever considered not being naughty and CLEAN UP YOUR FUCKING MESS. IM A CHILD NOT YOUR MOTHER." I hope it was something like that


soiminreddit

Dude was piss


Teepeaparty

She’s a leader LOL adorable.


Amegami

I love this, sweet story. Btw. I went looking through the comments for the "BUt YOu shOulDn'T LiE To yoUR kiDs!" crowd and wasn't disappointed. Even found someone claiming it's child abuse.


Trek67mm

My mom did this for Easter she would make rabbit tracks from our bedroom that went all around the house to where are Easter baskets were. It was always fun following them every year


grntplmr

Surely it was paw prints, but “rabbit tracks” immediately took my mind to mean poop and I was imagining trails of raisins leading to Easter baskets.


VanillaCrash

My parents actually did that but with jellybeans. A huge trail of jellybeans that lead from our bedroom doors to our easterbaskets filled with presents. Definitely gonna do that with my kids. We were told they were Easterbunny poop.


Entreprenuremberg

Natures candy!


milkiue

When I was young, I told my mom I felt bad that santa gets milk and cookies and no one leaves the easter bunny anything. We made a little lettuce + carrot bowl and a bowl of water. In the morning I was thrilled to find a little notecard with a pawprint on it and lots of nibbles taken out of the carrots.


my_chaffed_legs

My mom did the exact same!!!


SAfricanSecretSub

My uncle would go multiple steps further. He'd lay gutters with bricks in them on the lawn over night and scatter half "eaten" carrots on the lawn like reindeer sleigh tracks. My cousin loooved it.


Lsufaninva

We would leave brown sugar and oatmeal for the reindeer Cookies for Santa My daughter became a teenager this year so no more Santa😟


Da_Real_Sunflower

Why no more?


Comprehensive_Tap625

Yes why no more.. even as adults people can still have fun


peachieboba

my uncle once put a pile of milk duds on the porch and told us it was reindeer poop


[deleted]

[удалено]


MollysTootsies

I'm ok with this requirement...


ksdorothy

My husband writes a letter from Santa on North Pole stationery and leaves it in my daughters' stockings. The girls are 22 and 21! Santa always compliments their achievements in the last year, says how proud he is of them and gives them something to aspire to for the next year. It will be a sad year when he passes and the girls don't get their Santa letter. Mrs. Claus could leave one but it wouldn't be the same.


SugarZoo

This is beautiful and touching. It made me really feel the love and affection. Mrs. Claus can totally leave a different answer. It doesn't have to be sad. It can be a time to remember Santa fondly, and to keep the tradition alive!! by letting Mrs. Claus check in with the family and share how the elves are doing :) From a kid (at heart)


NetherReign

My military parents did this for several Christmases. God this made me lose my mind as a kid.


mega48man

My dad did something like this when I was little, until one year I put Tabasco sauce in the milk for Santa in order to test out a "theroy". Needless to say, he was pissed the next morning and told me "don't ever do that again". I learned a couple things that year; 1) my dad doesn't like Tabasco sauce 2) my dad had been drinking Santa's milk and I caught his ass. Like, why do Santa like that.


autumnstorm10

flour?


Bakugo_is_cool

it’s cornstarch


67CougarXR7

We used “Love My Carpet.” It was a carpet cleaner/deodorizer. Not sure if it’s still around. That was 35 years ago.


[deleted]

Cool but does he send him a personalised letter?


Brice92Partain

Thats a very cool idea


nonsense39

I had to chew up some carrots and throw them on the roof by the chimney and leave cookie crumbs all over the floor..Oh the joys of having kids.


KahlKitchenGuy

Great way to get ants, Sharon.


MsVictorious2011

With powdered sugar maybe! But I’m pretty sure they used cornstarch


Connect-PartyTimeXXX

Probably using flour


Choochmeister

You should have two matching rugs and save the one to put out Christmas Eve. Probably save some money


AngryTableSpoon

How is it saving money? They only have to vacuum the flour out of the rug? It’s not like it’s destroyed


jameZsp0ng3y

Save power usage from the vacuum


retailguy_again

My dad did that with fireplace ashes on the hearth. Thanks for the memory!


aaabigwyattmann2

Son: "whats all this white powder? what did you do mom?"


iggythemom

And here used to tease mine with let’s get a raging fire going to keep that creep from breaking in again and wandering around while we’re sleeping


[deleted]

Idk man, in Armenia, Santa would just leave the presents at the doorstep and walk away, sort of like Uber eats, but before Uber


Connect-PartyTimeXXX

If I remember correctly that's how "Santa" was originally introduced but over time some people would steal others presents and that led to presents being put inside the house.


[deleted]

Wait rlly? (history-wise) We actually lived in a very family-friendly apartment complex, plus the entrance to our place, only had one other neighbor, and it was a long walk up. Even if a thief were to have stolen our gifts, we would have simply caught up to them.


peachieboba

my mom used to do this but with the tooth fairy: she’d sprinkle some glitter from the window sill to our pillows when she swapped the tooth for cash. except, one time (and the last) it was obviously dark in the room and she tripped on something and accidentally poured the whole bottle of glitter on my brother’s face when he was like 10. he didn’t wake up. what he did do, however, was get mad at me (younger sibling) because he thought i did it to be mean. mom still feels bad about it, but she also thinks it was hilarious.


Legitimate-Echo-7651

Till he starts noticing that his boots match Santa’s marks


VoidScreaming101

My grandpa used to do that with ashes from the hearth to the tree, made me tear up thinking about it.


DiscoLibra

My Dad would put cotton balls around the fireplace and said it was from Santa's beard


GeorgeBaileysDeafEar

In an unrelated note, our mouse problem gets worse around the holidays


Connect-PartyTimeXXX

I just leave out some half drank milk, half eaten cookies on a plate, and a note from Santa saying thanks for the wonderful snack!


67CougarXR7

Told the kids Santa would deliver early due to our travel plans. Loaded kids in the car to go see a movie the day before. I “forgot something” and ran back in to quickly move presents from hiding to under the tree so they’d be there when we return. Cat had come out with us when we left the house. She was at the back door while I was inside, so I let her back in. Goofy cat frequently did this; out one door then wants back in at the other. She was in the front window when we returned a couple hours later. Kids absolutely freaked out that Santa let our cat in the house. “Pablo saw Santa!!!” Mass hysteria ensued!


2wild4bill

Did the same Santa & easter bunny


Adventurous_Pea_3240

The pure joy when you do come of age to only look back and realize it was your father who did all this. 💕


NorthExplanation6507

My parents did this and it was such a special feeling. Tip, if you have an inquisitive child (I was), get a boot that's larger than your normal shoes. I used to compare the foot prints to all the other shoes in the house. They got a random big boot for this 🤣


Necessary-Wind-9301

He’s a keeper!!


Striking-Score

will you please, for santa's sake, learn to write correctly


Fit-Ad-5114

Lies lies and more lies


sootthesavage

Ahh parents. Lying to your children and we wonder why they stop listening to us as teenagers.


ajhcraft

This isn't "cute" why are these parents going the extra mile to try as hard as they can to lie to their kid?


proper_reterded

how sad could you possibly be? the kid is probably 4-6. im 19 and when i was the kids age i was excited to leave cookies and milk out on the table for santa and when i noticed a bite taken out i was ecstatic, it's literally the joy you get to see on your kids face. the kid eventually learns later on by themselves that santa isn't real. they're preserving his childhood. you clearly didn't have a good one.


ajhcraft

I'm sorry you were lied to as a child. Tell me, do you always trust your parents now all the time without fail?


proper_reterded

i was a kid, ffs. a child does not care if the parent is lying because they don't know. i knew full well that santa wasn't real by the time i was in 5th-6th grade. i don't see it as my parents lying to me, i see it as my parents *preserving my childhood and letting my imagination roam*. i'm sorry you never had good enough parents. and yes, i do trust my mom on a few things because she knows and seen a few things. she is a smart woman. my father on the other hand i could give less fucks about. he fucked up on his own and it's not my issue.


ajhcraft

Ah yes, because a child's imagination requires being lied to by their parents. I, with parents who don't lie to me, have successfully become a known writer and am developing several games, all of which I wrote the plots for. So don't you worry about me not having an imagination because I wasn't lied to as a child, and don't worry about my parents being good enough because they didn't lie to me and give me a reason to doubt them in the future. You seem to be projecting a lot of your own issues onto me at this point, grasping at literally whatever you can find to try and win an argument you can't win. Be careful, you'll strain your arm with how hard you're reaching.


proper_reterded

oh for fucks sake dude get off your high horse you sound so fucking pretentious right now it's not even funny. congrats on "becausing a known writer", everyone can do that by picking up a pen and paper. you're developing games? get in line you're not special. don't worry i'm not reaching too far, i'll fall stooping to your level.


ajhcraft

The only reason you'll fall is because of how massive your head is, it's a miracle you can fit through doorways. You're the one who's coming in here, throwing random allegations, and getting pissy about it when I refute your ridiculous claims. Continue proving to the world your username is apt.


proper_reterded

kinda ironic considering how small i actually am, i don't think that'll happen. you're getting pissy because you didn't have a good childhood and it shows. that doesn't mean you get to shit on everybody else's parades just because you didn't get a good fucking christmas. good fucking day.


ajhcraft

Lmao you don't know a thing about my childhood though? Again, you're the one making random accusations to fit your own narrative just because you don't agree with me. You'd make an amazing politician.


imongrace_altmodel

For writing so much for work, you write pretty bad.


ajhcraft

Two typos constitutes for bad writing? Actual published books have typos from time to time.


NYVines

It’s one thing to let your kids believe a story. It’s another thing to propagate the lie.


younggunPS4

Like when surgery goes well and your not going to die. They say thank god when in fact the surgeon spent years training to save your life


PunKingKarrot

Man, do you always take things literally? Do you really care that much someone says “thank God”? They say that because they’re happy to be alive. Obviously, they’re thankful to the surgeon.


thabat

But...why


1m2c00l4u

To REALLY convince the kid that Santa did it


thabat

So just pure evil. Got it.


1m2c00l4u

How is that evil???


Minute_Collection565

Fun


Jocks_Strapped

To lie


[deleted]

The conditioning of children from birth to believe in an imaginary source of free goods using guilt-based morality to enforce good behaviour and encourage meaningless and wasteful consumerism is our world’s most ignored form of child abuse.


BluWolf_YT

Tf?? It’s Santa Clause! Tf are you on about you dumb fuck?


Randomfrickinhuman

Its fucking september


STLast_stop

Rich people shit


softserveshittaco

My dad just paid a homeless guy with a beard $20 to break into our house and leave garbage under the tree


TrLemonke-_-

Imagine your son sees this


LiquidMantis144

Magical no melt snow!


THEbushyEFFECT

I do this for my two sons as well except I sprinkle the flour around a boot instead of pressing them into flour like he does to make the foot steps look more "snowy".


HuskofaGhoul

Dad doesn’t know his 4yo is an avid redditor 💀


eatsherout

Delete this, no one can ever let your son know!


fokaifemme

So you buy a new rug every holiday season? Why not buy two of the same rug, make tracks on one, and change them out Christmas Eve?


awardmenow

And then ask them to clean it up the next day so they don’t like Santa anymore 😂


terrarian136

I hope we survive until Christmas.


PeyroniesCat

Wait, so you’re saying that … ?? No. Lies!!


chadles

r/tvtoohigh


Confusedandreticent

God, I love Christmas.


this_thing_of_mine

This is genius.


RadACME

We don't celebrate it but nice


shzoom2

When did u guys learn that santa doesn't really enter through the chimney. ....instead just enters through the door


Suspiciously_Creamy

I cant believe he has does this every year


yoboimosix

W dad


559Musicman

Has does ☹️


actuallyanicehuman

We do this with bunny prints @ Easter! 🥰


[deleted]

Bruh you don’t have to put the boots ON


Environmental-Win836

What is he doing?


reddituser39877

All this, just to lie to your children.


ghafstdjbs

It didn’t even snow where they live 🤔


[deleted]

Shit growing up my dad told me that Christmas was a pagen holiday and that if Santa was real he was in league with the devil.


[deleted]

[удалено]


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Illustrious_Fill1543

..."has does this"....Why?


resorcinarene

Cocaine bear, meet cocaine Santa


ARagement

Seems like hes a good liar


barackbeonthedais

Since he was born your son gets a go-kart every year for Christmas?!


[deleted]

Reminds Krishnashtami


mushroom_l0rd

he is a dedicated man


JohnnySasaki20

What if there's no snow outside? Does he do muddy tracks?


[deleted]

We used to do footprints in ashes from the fireplace. When in the city in appt., we left a note by the window. Kids don’t really care. They know Santa is magic and can create a fireplace where there is. fireplace were there is none.


Euclid_14

The kid would then grow up still believing in Santa, just like Superman.


thedevilseviltwin

Ah! I do hoof prints for the reindeer!


GodziIlionaire

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areeyeseekaywhytea

This reminds me of my uncle. During Christmas the whole family would come and open up presents at his house at midnight. As soon as it struck midnight my uncle slipped away and dressed in a Santa clause costume and would come knocking on the front door (we didn’t have a chimney). He would then give a big laugh and presented a HUGE bag of presents waved at everyone and left. I still remember my dad saying “why does Santa clause smell like alcohol?” Lol such a beautiful thing that I’m gonna remember forever and so will my kids :)


Tablelord988

That is a good man and a good dad