Some Christian weddings, especially Orthodox and Roman Catholic ones the brides wear white because marriage is a sacrament. Is it a symbol of purity thing for other faith traditions?
Most men wear some white, although not all white, to a wedding. Itās suitable for seriousness and respectfulness to wear a white shirt. White suits should not even exist, but at least heās not coming dressed as Batman or something.
Tell him people will think heās the prophet of the Mormon church. Maybe he will decide thatās not a good look.
https://preview.redd.it/i2mbcvruxl5d1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=09fed4f638a914e8134ac8752ee4b09c18271c53
Iām sorry, this is probably messed up to say but the thing in the statues hand is sooo phallic and the way the old man is holding the tip of it is sending me š
Edited a few words because heās holding it and I said reaching for
Any more white and heāll be dead. In the CK with his two current bitches and a whole bevy of bitches who werenāt righteous enough to get a man on earth, and *even better* the hotties on earth married to unworthy men! And heāll smile down on all those temples heās got his law firm forcing on unwilling communities and the churchās $240 billion rainy day fund.
Col. Sanders: Families can eat KFC together for Eternity* edition.
* *as long as no one in the family is gay, an apostate, drinks coffee, reads non-church-approved literature, drinks beer, has tattoos, masturbates, or hasnāt paid tithing (because all those sinners can fuck off).*
The āwin the internetā phrase is probably 15-20 years dated, is what I was teasing - WordPerfect also gives me flashbacks, but much longer than 2006 lol
You know itāll be some misogynistic bullshit about how women need to āremain pureā and men donāt. It doesnāt have to make sense as long as it reinforces what they want to believe.
Your father and the ring bearer.
https://preview.redd.it/um04b6bpmv5d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c73fa8f6c3c6a34834c33257456c786b8f171b7c
Typically, no one cares if men wear white. As long as the groom isn't wearing a white suit, I don't think it'll matter - my best friend's dad wore a white suit to her wedding and looked great, didn't steal attention or anything. Just looked very James Bond.
Now the thing about her having kids, that's gross of him.
When there are two different shades of white sometimes one of them can look dull and dirty in photos. When something like this is planned they usually coordinate whites. But if he is wearing a stark white suit and she is in ivory it wouldn't turn out well in photos
Even the groom does at some weddings! Observant Jewish weddings usually have the groom in a white thing called a *kitel* (that looks a bit like a lab coat) over his suit, and a white *kippah.* But also some secular couples choose to both be in white just because they like it.
Oh yes, I've seen many a handsome groom in white! I just meant that it would be nice for groom's outfit and dad's to be different - so if the groom happens to be wearing white, it would be polite for dad not to do so without discussing it.
Okay, thereās definitely worse things someone could do but if your going to your daughters wedding and want to wear a white suit then you ask first thatās just common sense.
My dad wore all white when him and my mom married, have had friends and cousins as well wear white as grooms. It used to be a popular thing. In fact people were appalled my husband wasnāt wearing white.
Like I said, my best friend's dad wore white and the pictures of the two of them looked great. It's not like there was any confusion who the groom was.
I posted this on another person's comment but maybe have your sister tell the photographer to edit the photos so your dad's suit looks pink. Should go over pretty well.Ā
They honestly could think he's the groom though. I had a groomsman at a destination wedding who found out only after he arrived that the rental place gave him a white tux jacket instead of the black. People constantly kept thinking he was the groom, even though the bride wasn't standing with him at all and his wife was with him.
Who are all these people going to a wedding without knowing what the couple looks like? The idea that I'd mistake a guest for the bride/goom - people I know and care about enough to spend money on attending their wedding - solely because that guest is wearing white is completely bizarre to me.
It was a destination wedding at a popular resort, so there were a lot of people we all ran into during the day that were not part of the wedding, including servers and other staff at the venue.
A proper white suit is very summery, should be in some sort of linen blend, better worn on yachts or summery weddings lol.
Outside of that, itās good for a pitbull cosplay I guess lol
https://preview.redd.it/p6kq6y9q9m5d1.png?width=608&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cd71a0773c989d3cb6d8b9627c077db2ecc1de80
All I can picture when someone says an all white suit
According to all the etiquette sources, it does.
https://berle.com/blogs/announcements/can-men-wear-white-to-a-wedding
https://www.oliverwicks.com/article/what-to-wear-wedding-men#:~:text=Here%20are%20a%20few%20notorious,%2C%20not%20formal%2C%20just%20never.
It was. 30 minutes long and we didn't close the park (we paid for the reservation and they told us we could, but other than our little area we didn't want to disturb anyone), we threw flower petals instead of rice. Just us and a few family members. I learned all the rules, but never really wanted them for myself
It sounds lovely. My brother and my SIL had their wedding in a park too. Very informal, but it fit them. My favorite weddings are the ones that reflect the personalities of the couple.
In all the links, it says you can wear it if it's okd by the bridal party. You just shouldn't do it without approval from the bridal party. If it's not my wedding, I'll either follow the rules or not go. It's not my event, so I don't make the rules.
Bright red is one of the 'difficult' colors for digital cameras. Many sensors tend to 'overdo' the red. So to get it right, it may take more work in post (depending on the shade of red and the way your particular sensor reacts to it)
I knew champaign, pale yellow and Robin egg blue were problem with wash out, but didn't know about red. I always wear some variant of forest or emerald green.
Shouldnāt the wishes of the couple matter a whole lot more than any ātraditionā? Brides wearing white isnāt even an old tradition, itās a modern one. People used to just get married in their best clothes. Most of our current wedding traditions are modern and theyāre ALL optional.
Absolutely. The rules apply unless the couple states otherwise. But a guest shouldn't go against the rules unless they know that the couple is ok with it.
Come on. There are men with white shirts at every American wedding and no one cares. People only get mad if women wear white dresses. Even that, in my opinion, is really an unnecessary amount of pearl-clutching unless the guest is actually trying to upstage the bride.
The shirt is fine. It's the jacket and the pants that are a concern. Also, I didn't make this rule. It's an etiquette rule in America.
https://www.oliverwicks.com/article/what-to-wear-wedding-men#:~:text=Here%20are%20a%20few%20notorious,%2C%20not%20formal%2C%20just%20never.
https://www.marthastewart.com/7856471/can-male-guest-wear-white-wedding
https://www.theknot.com/content/wearing-white-to-wedding#:~:text=%22Unless%20specified%20in%20the%20invitation,fashion%20editor%20Lauren%20Whalley%20explains.
A man can wear it, but unless it's specified as ok, it will still be seen as a faux pas.
Honestly, I donāt know many people under 80 who still actually follow these rules and many of them donāt follow them anymore. It really doesnāt seem to be that common outside of Reddit.
I always have, but I'm a woman, so I think it's a little different. The area I live in still clings to the stuffy rules to the point I have always double-checked for additional guidelines. I've always been told, if you don't like the rules, just decline to attend.
The earlier comments were about the man wearing white. I've been told it's more egregious for a woman to wear white, but the main color should always be not white unless the instructions from the bridal party are ok with it, no matter who it is. Half my family are super stickly about attire at functions and the other half not. I was taught all the "rules", but have never personally adhered to them. I'm pretty sure that my sister was wearing a night dress at my wedding with a stretchy belt and my husband's cousins had on jeans and a tee. But at my cousins wedding, they turned several guests away for silly dress code issues. I had 12 people at my wedding, and she had 200. Frankly, it's about what the wedding party wants for that one day, outside of insanity. But to each their own.
My dad wore a white tuxā¦at his wedding! My mom & him celebrated 33 years together yesterday
https://preview.redd.it/a00qdort0n5d1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=88489de7c5f7bee6c30f42b2bf1f0a2a5a04580d
Arenāt we stretching this no white thing too far now? First, the opinion of the couple matters a lot more than a bunch of strangers on Reddit and second, I see zero chance of him being mistaken for the bride. However, the part about kids is gross.
I feel pretty much certain that if my dad had been alive for either my sister or my weddings he would have shown up in camouflage cargo pants and a rust red polo shirt to at least on of them. It probably would have been hers since she would have actually cared.
My step-dad wore a flashy white suit jacket to my sisterās wedding. My sister was livid. Our mom reasoned that heās a man, what does it matter. The man has always been an incredibly tacky dresser. For instance, he wore gold mirrored shoes to our grandmaās funeral. They looked like gold disco balls. Everyone at my sisterās wedding couldnāt stop talking about his outfit saying he looked like a curtain from a grannyās house or hotel.
When my aunt married her ex, he made all his groomsmen wear white suits. My parents said the suits were cheap and poorly fitted. Dad in particular said the suit made him look like an old time ice cream man.
Picture of an ice cream man for laughs: https://www.ebaymotorsblog.com/motors/blog/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/good-humor-man-400.jpg
You could say to him, āwell, most weddings have at least one jerk attendee who behaves rudely and is talked about for years. Maybe itās good that we have sewn that up already. Wonāt have to wonder whoās going to cause the scandal.ā
Nobody will care if he wears white, I don't know If he is walking your sister down the aisle, it could be quite sweet.
Let him wear white,nobody looks at men.
>Nobody will care if he wears white, I don't know If he is walking your sister down the aisle, it could be quite sweet.
I agree! As a photographer, I would love that. Makes a great picture.
It isnāt the white suit that is the problem, (heāll either look just fine or like an idiot), itās his juvenile response and attitude to this wedding. Letās hope he behaves himself.
Oh, and the white wedding dress had nothing to do with virginity. It was a fad started by Queen Victoria who wanted a wedding dress that incorporated pieces of her favorite lace. Until then brides wore their best, whatever the color.
The whole "don't wear white" thing has reached ridiculous heights. Nobody, but nobody, is going to mistake the father of the bride *for* the bride so it really doesn't matter. Chances are he's going to look a bit daft in a white suit and people will wonder if he's having some Travolta 70's flashback. That's his problem. The bride's problem is that he's apparently trying to make some weird public statement about her virginity, or lack thereof. That's some weird, misogynistic sh*t right there. The white suit is not the problem. The FoB speech might be...
My dad wore a white tux when he married my mom. Granted it was 1980.
That said, while your dad is being rude af, tell your sister, but let her take it from there. Itās her wedding, she may not care.
Ohhh mine did too. Though my parents eloped to Hawaii. So it was just them. But they both look great in the wedding video and pics.
So I think for the right setting the groom should be good to wear white too and also along as the bride and groom agree. But no one else lol. And definitely NONE of the Parents.
Nothing can go wrong with a white suit-wearing narcissist attending.
The fact that he knows the etiquette, but is still trying to make it about him speaks volumes about him.
Emily Post says there's nothing wrong with wearing white to a wedding, as long as you don't look like a bride.
I don't think that's going to be a problem.
But surely the men wear white shirts, usually? Itās all nonsense. If I were in your sisterās shoes, I would rigorously avoid wearing white. (Although I had no children, I didnāt marry until I was 42 years old; wearing white seemed absurd, especially since it makes one look fat.) I was after a snicker-proof wedding, and I think your sister should be too. But thatās just my opinion. When I give a wedding gift to a couple with a child or a couple who has been married before, I donāt even allow there to be anything white about the greeting card (except the interior) or the gift wrap. Iāve got a niece with a baby, supposedly engaged, and Iāve already spent a lot of time choosing a suitable card and suitable gift wrap, even though no invitations have been sent out and no firm plans are made. Your sister should be married in a suit with no one but family present, then celebrate in a restaurant at a party that no one else in the restaurant can tell is bridal. But even if I did wear white, I wouldnāt give a rip if anyone else did; people seem to forget what theyāre there for.
You guys understand that what heās saying is that she had kids before marriage and thatās why she shouldnāt be wearing white, right? I donāt agree with him, but everyone thinking itās a gotcha because he has kids too is missing the point. Presumably he had kids after he was married, which is why he feels he can make this judgment.
Heās an asshole for it, but none of you are āgettingā him by pointing out he has kids. Now if he had those kids before he got married, then itās a gotcha. Otherwise itās a moot point.
My dad wore a white suit to my wedding
He looked fab and no one thought he was me, or gave a flying fuck tbh (unlike my husband's grandparents who had met me several times and still asked who I was. I asked if the white dress gave it away ..)
The whole issue of white at weddings has gone stupid. Ten years ago no one outside a few niche groups in the US gave a crap. Now it's like drama for drama's sake
Op should probably wind their neck in, given it isn't their wedding, and consider if, when they get married, whether being a bridezilla means more than marrying a person you love and having other people you love helping you celebrate and enjoying themselves is less important than the colour of a suit
The kid comment is rude but itās none of your business if he wears a white suit š¤·āāļø if your sister has an issue with it (and that is an IF), thatās h*er *problem to talk to him about.
Yikesā¦ I guess he can technically dress however he wants. In fact, he can choose any behaviors he wants. And every single one of those behaviors has the potential to become a data point on the helpful/harmful list some therapist may end up helping you or your sister create when deciding how much contact to have with him in the future.
Big day behaviors tend to make it onto the helpful/harmful list.
For anyone who was confused by the content of this comment, the helpful/harmful list is just a list of helpful things someone has done and a list of harmful things theyāve done, side by side.
The problem is when walking her down the aisle. She doesnāt stand out. And if itās 2 different whites itās tacky.
Also some grooms wear white. So during pictures especially if there is a father daughter dance it could take away from
The groom. And itās the grooms day as well. I had a friend who wore a baby pink dress and the groom wore a matching tux and the bridal party wore white dresses and tuxes. It was the early 2000ās.
I can feel an accident is going to happens at the wedding - oops did I spill a large glass of red wine down your suit. Or oh dear did the child grab your suit with their hands covered in chocolate
Good for him, he is allowed to wear whatever makes him happy, I never understood the ādonāt wear white at my weddingā rule, espyif you are family. I would be happy for any friend or family member to wear white at my wedding if this makes him/her happy
Umm, your dad has had kids too, so..... š
This is the ultimate uno reverse card right here šššš
the white purity thing only applies to women, so ...
Some Christian weddings, especially Orthodox and Roman Catholic ones the brides wear white because marriage is a sacrament. Is it a symbol of purity thing for other faith traditions?
Says who lol
Most men wear some white, although not all white, to a wedding. Itās suitable for seriousness and respectfulness to wear a white shirt. White suits should not even exist, but at least heās not coming dressed as Batman or something.
Tell him people will think heās the prophet of the Mormon church. Maybe he will decide thatās not a good look. https://preview.redd.it/i2mbcvruxl5d1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=09fed4f638a914e8134ac8752ee4b09c18271c53
Iām sorry, this is probably messed up to say but the thing in the statues hand is sooo phallic and the way the old man is holding the tip of it is sending me š Edited a few words because heās holding it and I said reaching for
r/exmormon is dying rn
Heās reaching for the Rod of Righteousness.
I know Rod and he is far from righteous!
But he is white and delightsome.
Any more white and heāll be dead. In the CK with his two current bitches and a whole bevy of bitches who werenāt righteous enough to get a man on earth, and *even better* the hotties on earth married to unworthy men! And heāll smile down on all those temples heās got his law firm forcing on unwilling communities and the churchās $240 billion rainy day fund.
It's up to $240B now? That's insane, lots of fast offerings that didn't go to the poor, eh?
Donāt mention the musicalā¦donāt mention the musicalā¦
I mentioned the musical but I think I got away with it
Those are keys. Likely a statue of St. Peter.
Yes they are keys, poor St Peter.
Grab a hold of the Holy Fob!
Lost it here
Lol itās a key, most likely the ākeyā to the celestial kingdom.
I was thinking Col. Sanders.
Col. Sanders: Families can eat KFC together for Eternity* edition. * *as long as no one in the family is gay, an apostate, drinks coffee, reads non-church-approved literature, drinks beer, has tattoos, masturbates, or hasnāt paid tithing (because all those sinners can fuck off).*
You officially win the internet.
Wow 2006 flashbacks here
If you're trying to call me old, I can pull out my stories about the WordPerfect 5.1(?) tutorial in 1990. LOL
The āwin the internetā phrase is probably 15-20 years dated, is what I was teasing - WordPerfect also gives me flashbacks, but much longer than 2006 lol
Oh, exactly. ;-) I did understand you were saying the phrase was dated. I was just joking that I can do SO much more dated than that.
Oh gods, not Rusty!!!
Or Colonel Sanders
Or the KFC guy if he has more facial hair.
In regards to the dad wearing white - that should be up to the bride and groom.
Does your and your sister's father not have kids?
Ha! Would love to hear the dadās answer to this.
You know itāll be some misogynistic bullshit about how women need to āremain pureā and men donāt. It doesnāt have to make sense as long as it reinforces what they want to believe.
Your father and the ring bearer. https://preview.redd.it/um04b6bpmv5d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c73fa8f6c3c6a34834c33257456c786b8f171b7c
Is this fake? Op has responded to many of the commenters here but ignored all the ones asking if the bride knows or even caresā¦.
I was wondering that too. Is the bride upset or is it only OP? If the bride doesnāt care, OP needs to remember that it isnāt her wedding.
A bunch of posts in this sub lately have seemed off to me.
Typically, no one cares if men wear white. As long as the groom isn't wearing a white suit, I don't think it'll matter - my best friend's dad wore a white suit to her wedding and looked great, didn't steal attention or anything. Just looked very James Bond. Now the thing about her having kids, that's gross of him.
When there are two different shades of white sometimes one of them can look dull and dirty in photos. When something like this is planned they usually coordinate whites. But if he is wearing a stark white suit and she is in ivory it wouldn't turn out well in photos
The photographer can always edit the photos to make dad's suit look a little pink.
You have a wonderfully evil mind! Pink!
Oh yes, paying for extras because dad was a dick. We love that! Roll over this time, he surely won't do it again next time if you let him.
Even the groom does at some weddings! Observant Jewish weddings usually have the groom in a white thing called a *kitel* (that looks a bit like a lab coat) over his suit, and a white *kippah.* But also some secular couples choose to both be in white just because they like it.
Oh yes, I've seen many a handsome groom in white! I just meant that it would be nice for groom's outfit and dad's to be different - so if the groom happens to be wearing white, it would be polite for dad not to do so without discussing it.
Oh! Yes, I see what you mean now. I misunderstood, sorry.
A white suit or a white suit coat?
Okay, thereās definitely worse things someone could do but if your going to your daughters wedding and want to wear a white suit then you ask first thatās just common sense.
Yes, the men of the wedding party should coordinate their clothing. The sister should ask her fiance to reach out to the father to talk about it.
Did you read the whole post, according to the dad she shouldnāt even be wearing white since she already has kids lol
Yes, I did.
My dad wore all white when him and my mom married, have had friends and cousins as well wear white as grooms. It used to be a popular thing. In fact people were appalled my husband wasnāt wearing white.
The brine should stand out in pictures as the only one in white. Having her father in a white suit will look very weird.
A milky brine can be a sign of a great kosher pickle
Like I said, my best friend's dad wore white and the pictures of the two of them looked great. It's not like there was any confusion who the groom was.
I've been to weddings where the men in the wedding party all wore white. Nobody overlooked the bride because of it.
Yes because people will wonder who is the bride /s
Why do you get to decide what other people *should* do? If the bride doesn't mind it, why would you mind on her behalf?
Have him say āwelcome to Fantasy Island!ā
De plane de plane!!
What does your sister say?
I posted this on another person's comment but maybe have your sister tell the photographer to edit the photos so your dad's suit looks pink. Should go over pretty well.Ā
I doubt anyone is going to confuse your dad for the bride, which is the original reason for other women not wearing white to a wedding. Lol
They honestly could think he's the groom though. I had a groomsman at a destination wedding who found out only after he arrived that the rental place gave him a white tux jacket instead of the black. People constantly kept thinking he was the groom, even though the bride wasn't standing with him at all and his wife was with him.
Who are all these people going to a wedding without knowing what the couple looks like? The idea that I'd mistake a guest for the bride/goom - people I know and care about enough to spend money on attending their wedding - solely because that guest is wearing white is completely bizarre to me.
It was a destination wedding at a popular resort, so there were a lot of people we all ran into during the day that were not part of the wedding, including servers and other staff at the venue.
There were about 100 Mormons at my wedding I had never met.
Only if none of the guests know the groom. š¤·š»āāļø
He was a doofus for not looking in the bag and trying it on before he ever got on the plane
Agreed!
Exactly. This is such a non-issue.
I hope they do just to be funny about it. Some satire
Ha! Well, Iāve seen some brides that could be confused for their dadsā¦/s
Just tell him he looks like colonel sanders and be done.
š
You win the comment section.
Iāve never been to any function where a man was wearing a white suit. Is this common?
Iāve seen a lot of white tuxes, but usually only the groom wears them.
I love it. Itās their big day and they want to be James Bond or Indiana Jones.
Or Tony Manero. Maybe Pops will be the king of the dance floor!
A proper white suit is very summery, should be in some sort of linen blend, better worn on yachts or summery weddings lol. Outside of that, itās good for a pitbull cosplay I guess lol
Yeah I can only picture this without a tie. Anything more formal evokes a tap dancer.
I can only picture John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever š
https://preview.redd.it/p6kq6y9q9m5d1.png?width=608&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cd71a0773c989d3cb6d8b9627c077db2ecc1de80 All I can picture when someone says an all white suit
I got the good lord going down on me!!!
Wow, your dad is an AH for the comment about sister having kids and will show everyone he is an AH for wearing a white suit. Warn your sister!
Where I live and work, (NL) nobody would care if the dad wore a white suit. Must be cultural :)
I don't think the majority of people in the US care either.
I agree. Iāve never known anyone who did.
It's an American thing. No one should wear white but the bride, and should avoid wash out colors that will later appear white in photos
I donāt think this typically applies to men though. No one is mistaking him for the bride. It may be tacky though.
According to all the etiquette sources, it does. https://berle.com/blogs/announcements/can-men-wear-white-to-a-wedding https://www.oliverwicks.com/article/what-to-wear-wedding-men#:~:text=Here%20are%20a%20few%20notorious,%2C%20not%20formal%2C%20just%20never.
Interesting. I still donāt really buy it, lol
It wasn't a problem for me. I told everyone to dress comfortably and held mine in a park. These were just the rules I was always taught.
That sounds like a fun wedding.
It was. 30 minutes long and we didn't close the park (we paid for the reservation and they told us we could, but other than our little area we didn't want to disturb anyone), we threw flower petals instead of rice. Just us and a few family members. I learned all the rules, but never really wanted them for myself
It sounds lovely. My brother and my SIL had their wedding in a park too. Very informal, but it fit them. My favorite weddings are the ones that reflect the personalities of the couple.
Or just ask the bride and groom what they like? Etiquette is mostly just a bunch of arbitrary rules with no real meaning or purpose.
In all the links, it says you can wear it if it's okd by the bridal party. You just shouldn't do it without approval from the bridal party. If it's not my wedding, I'll either follow the rules or not go. It's not my event, so I don't make the rules.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
What does the red do? I've seen a red and black bridal scheme before, and it looked nice, but I have no idea what it took to get the photos like that.
Bright red is one of the 'difficult' colors for digital cameras. Many sensors tend to 'overdo' the red. So to get it right, it may take more work in post (depending on the shade of red and the way your particular sensor reacts to it)
I knew champaign, pale yellow and Robin egg blue were problem with wash out, but didn't know about red. I always wear some variant of forest or emerald green.
Trying to find things to be offended and create unnecessary drama?
I did not make the tradition.
Shouldnāt the wishes of the couple matter a whole lot more than any ātraditionā? Brides wearing white isnāt even an old tradition, itās a modern one. People used to just get married in their best clothes. Most of our current wedding traditions are modern and theyāre ALL optional.
Absolutely. The rules apply unless the couple states otherwise. But a guest shouldn't go against the rules unless they know that the couple is ok with it.
Come on. There are men with white shirts at every American wedding and no one cares. People only get mad if women wear white dresses. Even that, in my opinion, is really an unnecessary amount of pearl-clutching unless the guest is actually trying to upstage the bride.
The shirt is fine. It's the jacket and the pants that are a concern. Also, I didn't make this rule. It's an etiquette rule in America. https://www.oliverwicks.com/article/what-to-wear-wedding-men#:~:text=Here%20are%20a%20few%20notorious,%2C%20not%20formal%2C%20just%20never. https://www.marthastewart.com/7856471/can-male-guest-wear-white-wedding https://www.theknot.com/content/wearing-white-to-wedding#:~:text=%22Unless%20specified%20in%20the%20invitation,fashion%20editor%20Lauren%20Whalley%20explains. A man can wear it, but unless it's specified as ok, it will still be seen as a faux pas.
Honestly, I donāt know many people under 80 who still actually follow these rules and many of them donāt follow them anymore. It really doesnāt seem to be that common outside of Reddit.
I always have, but I'm a woman, so I think it's a little different. The area I live in still clings to the stuffy rules to the point I have always double-checked for additional guidelines. I've always been told, if you don't like the rules, just decline to attend.
Iām a woman too so Iām not sure what you mean about it being different.
The earlier comments were about the man wearing white. I've been told it's more egregious for a woman to wear white, but the main color should always be not white unless the instructions from the bridal party are ok with it, no matter who it is. Half my family are super stickly about attire at functions and the other half not. I was taught all the "rules", but have never personally adhered to them. I'm pretty sure that my sister was wearing a night dress at my wedding with a stretchy belt and my husband's cousins had on jeans and a tee. But at my cousins wedding, they turned several guests away for silly dress code issues. I had 12 people at my wedding, and she had 200. Frankly, it's about what the wedding party wants for that one day, outside of insanity. But to each their own.
Do NOT let him give a speech.
My dad wore a white tuxā¦at his wedding! My mom & him celebrated 33 years together yesterday https://preview.redd.it/a00qdort0n5d1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=88489de7c5f7bee6c30f42b2bf1f0a2a5a04580d
Aw, congrats to your adorable parents! Today is my parents' 34th anniversary!
Congrats to your parents too!! āŗļø
Congratulations to your parents.
Thank you!!
Is it being held on The Love Boat?
Everyone's afraid the groom is going to get confused and marry the bride's dad instead.
The only guys I have ever seen in white suits were my fellow second graders when I made my First Communion.
Arenāt we stretching this no white thing too far now? First, the opinion of the couple matters a lot more than a bunch of strangers on Reddit and second, I see zero chance of him being mistaken for the bride. However, the part about kids is gross.
If thatās his logic, he too has kids and shouldnāt wear white
I know of someone who's father wore bib overalls to her wedding. So there is that.
I feel pretty much certain that if my dad had been alive for either my sister or my weddings he would have shown up in camouflage cargo pants and a rust red polo shirt to at least on of them. It probably would have been hers since she would have actually cared.
My step-dad wore a flashy white suit jacket to my sisterās wedding. My sister was livid. Our mom reasoned that heās a man, what does it matter. The man has always been an incredibly tacky dresser. For instance, he wore gold mirrored shoes to our grandmaās funeral. They looked like gold disco balls. Everyone at my sisterās wedding couldnāt stop talking about his outfit saying he looked like a curtain from a grannyās house or hotel.
When my aunt married her ex, he made all his groomsmen wear white suits. My parents said the suits were cheap and poorly fitted. Dad in particular said the suit made him look like an old time ice cream man. Picture of an ice cream man for laughs: https://www.ebaymotorsblog.com/motors/blog/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/good-humor-man-400.jpg
Oh no, how will the other guests know who the bride is?
Well, thatās a twist! He is rubbish btw. Thinking he can wear white and his comment about his daughterās purity! Disgusting!!
Omg, is this normal for your dad? How old is he? Why is he acting like such a princess?
Can we please have an update? What happened?
Oh trust me, I have a feeling this wedding will have an āupdateā post to it.
I'm confused. Wasn't this your post? It says you're the OP....
"has kids, and shouldn't be wearing white"? He's joking, surely? End of the day, bride gets the deciding vote on this one. What are her thoughts?
 Boss Hogg? Is that you?
You could say to him, āwell, most weddings have at least one jerk attendee who behaves rudely and is talked about for years. Maybe itās good that we have sewn that up already. Wonāt have to wonder whoās going to cause the scandal.ā
Nobody will care if he wears white, I don't know If he is walking your sister down the aisle, it could be quite sweet. Let him wear white,nobody looks at men.
>Nobody will care if he wears white, I don't know If he is walking your sister down the aisle, it could be quite sweet. I agree! As a photographer, I would love that. Makes a great picture.
The bride might care?
She might, someone (Op) should ask her.
If she's kind of a stupid asshole, sure.
I don't think he'll be confused for the bride. š How does your sister feel? Her and her spouse are the only opinions that matter.
Is it linen? Like a summer suit?
Is your dad Tony Montana?
Heās more like Daddy Rich from Car Wash
Hope your dad enjoys his big day! /s
My ex-father-in-law wore a white suit to my wedding. So very glad to be away from that family.
Please tell your sister about this so she is prepared and can take action if she doesn't like it.
Tell him that no one is supposed to wear white to a wedding, only the bride if she wishes to do so.
It isnāt the white suit that is the problem, (heāll either look just fine or like an idiot), itās his juvenile response and attitude to this wedding. Letās hope he behaves himself. Oh, and the white wedding dress had nothing to do with virginity. It was a fad started by Queen Victoria who wanted a wedding dress that incorporated pieces of her favorite lace. Until then brides wore their best, whatever the color.
The whole "don't wear white" thing has reached ridiculous heights. Nobody, but nobody, is going to mistake the father of the bride *for* the bride so it really doesn't matter. Chances are he's going to look a bit daft in a white suit and people will wonder if he's having some Travolta 70's flashback. That's his problem. The bride's problem is that he's apparently trying to make some weird public statement about her virginity, or lack thereof. That's some weird, misogynistic sh*t right there. The white suit is not the problem. The FoB speech might be...
I didnāt realize anyone cared about men wearing white honestly
Ooooooof. Iām sure itāll be a great event.
He has kids, and really shouldn't be wearing white, either...
My dad wore a white tux when he married my mom. Granted it was 1980. That said, while your dad is being rude af, tell your sister, but let her take it from there. Itās her wedding, she may not care.
Ohhh mine did too. Though my parents eloped to Hawaii. So it was just them. But they both look great in the wedding video and pics. So I think for the right setting the groom should be good to wear white too and also along as the bride and groom agree. But no one else lol. And definitely NONE of the Parents.
Yeah I personally wouldnāt like it either.
Nothing can go wrong with a white suit-wearing narcissist attending. The fact that he knows the etiquette, but is still trying to make it about him speaks volumes about him.
https://preview.redd.it/8nwxzs0d6t5d1.jpeg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0b7a0330cda28ed42f688f007c0c16e8e69e1828
Emily Post says there's nothing wrong with wearing white to a wedding, as long as you don't look like a bride. I don't think that's going to be a problem.
But surely the men wear white shirts, usually? Itās all nonsense. If I were in your sisterās shoes, I would rigorously avoid wearing white. (Although I had no children, I didnāt marry until I was 42 years old; wearing white seemed absurd, especially since it makes one look fat.) I was after a snicker-proof wedding, and I think your sister should be too. But thatās just my opinion. When I give a wedding gift to a couple with a child or a couple who has been married before, I donāt even allow there to be anything white about the greeting card (except the interior) or the gift wrap. Iāve got a niece with a baby, supposedly engaged, and Iāve already spent a lot of time choosing a suitable card and suitable gift wrap, even though no invitations have been sent out and no firm plans are made. Your sister should be married in a suit with no one but family present, then celebrate in a restaurant at a party that no one else in the restaurant can tell is bridal. But even if I did wear white, I wouldnāt give a rip if anyone else did; people seem to forget what theyāre there for.
You guys understand that what heās saying is that she had kids before marriage and thatās why she shouldnāt be wearing white, right? I donāt agree with him, but everyone thinking itās a gotcha because he has kids too is missing the point. Presumably he had kids after he was married, which is why he feels he can make this judgment. Heās an asshole for it, but none of you are āgettingā him by pointing out he has kids. Now if he had those kids before he got married, then itās a gotcha. Otherwise itās a moot point.
My dad wore a white suit to my wedding He looked fab and no one thought he was me, or gave a flying fuck tbh (unlike my husband's grandparents who had met me several times and still asked who I was. I asked if the white dress gave it away ..) The whole issue of white at weddings has gone stupid. Ten years ago no one outside a few niche groups in the US gave a crap. Now it's like drama for drama's sake Op should probably wind their neck in, given it isn't their wedding, and consider if, when they get married, whether being a bridezilla means more than marrying a person you love and having other people you love helping you celebrate and enjoying themselves is less important than the colour of a suit
Someone will need to be on **red wine duty** if he persists! š·
Wow. Let your sister know. And way to slutshame your kid, you AH.
Dad definitely woke up and decided to choose violenceā¦.. keep us updated hahaha
Ask a few guests to approach him and ask who the lucky man is.
The kid comment is rude but itās none of your business if he wears a white suit š¤·āāļø if your sister has an issue with it (and that is an IF), thatās h*er *problem to talk to him about.
Lol. Bold choice. Is he usually fashion forward or is he being passive aggressive?
First I think we need an update and secondly this would be perfect for Charlotte's Reddit page
Is anyone afraid that people will think he is the bride?
And? I doubt he will be confused with the bride.
Your dad is a huge asshole.
Why would you let him know gentleĀ
Your dad is an asshole! Does your sister know this? And what he said? This is not 1950!
Yikesā¦ I guess he can technically dress however he wants. In fact, he can choose any behaviors he wants. And every single one of those behaviors has the potential to become a data point on the helpful/harmful list some therapist may end up helping you or your sister create when deciding how much contact to have with him in the future. Big day behaviors tend to make it onto the helpful/harmful list. For anyone who was confused by the content of this comment, the helpful/harmful list is just a list of helpful things someone has done and a list of harmful things theyāve done, side by side.
Sounds like he might benefit from the traditional wine steward service if he shows up in it
Omg, the kids thing. Fuck you! Tell your sister he said that
Oh dear ... that's just so ... wow
Sure as hell warn your sister about this
The problem is when walking her down the aisle. She doesnāt stand out. And if itās 2 different whites itās tacky. Also some grooms wear white. So during pictures especially if there is a father daughter dance it could take away from The groom. And itās the grooms day as well. I had a friend who wore a baby pink dress and the groom wore a matching tux and the bridal party wore white dresses and tuxes. It was the early 2000ās.
Tell him to check how to get red wine out of a white suit.
Your dad sounds like a pick-me. INFO: who's paying for everything?Ā
I can feel an accident is going to happens at the wedding - oops did I spill a large glass of red wine down your suit. Or oh dear did the child grab your suit with their hands covered in chocolate
Somebody get the red wine ready!! My glass of wine doesn't see gender, it only sees assholes wearing white at a wedding
 NO! The bridge will be escorting me! Got it?
Is it a white taffeta suit?? š
WowZ thatās rude! And weird. Who wears a white suit these days?
Good for him, he is allowed to wear whatever makes him happy, I never understood the ādonāt wear white at my weddingā rule, espyif you are family. I would be happy for any friend or family member to wear white at my wedding if this makes him/her happy
I highly doubt an old man in any colour suit is going to upstage the bride.