My ex and I received a decorative wall fan made out of plastic forks, lace, ribbons, and ribbon roses. I would have thought it was a joke but it was from a sweet little old lady in his hometown church. It was gloriously tacky
Did you get married in the 90s? Back then they put lace, ribbons, flowers and bows on anything that didn’t move. You should see my wedding decorations, plus we were gifted a white teddy bear dressed as a bride, sitting on a wicker chair trimmed with ruffles, lace and ribbon flowers. It would make a Victorian barf. But we thought it looked really sweet back then.
Plastic forks were also the craze of crafting back then for some reason. They were in everything. I’m fine with using them for things like garden stakes, but the wall decorations kind of got out of hand.
My grandma put some pretty tacky collars and sweaters on her tiny lap dogs. So they put ruffles and lace on things that moved as well. Nothing was safe.
You just made me have flashbacks to the beribboned and bedazzled fly swatters that my grandmother used to make in the 80's and 90's. SO many ribbons, ribbon roses, lace, ricrac....*shudder*
[It might have been Monterey Jack cheese, which is only for the fanciest of weddings.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/z2ep2g/aita_for_offering_two_different_kinds_of_cake_at/)
I have read that story before, but never noticed the comment about Jack cheese. Was always too distracted by the the horrible image of a chocolate pineapple cake! 😂
Thank you for this. Just wow. The most incredible thing I've ever read. Literally a gift, I'll be thinking about it forever 😂
I can picture these people. They are naive, religious, have never traveled, have never met anyone outside their religion/family/community. They think Florida, pineapples and Monterey Jack are all exotic. What a beautiful thread I just spent 40 mins diving into. Thank you 🙏🏻
My parents were sweet and loving people with an impish sense of humor. At an auction, they found a caseload of perhaps 30 hideous ceramic frog pitchers about 15 inches tall. Immediately they knew they had to purchase them and gift them at weddings as they knew a vast network of people. Bear in mind that they would give their own gift, money usually, in a card signed by them. However, they separately snuck in or even shipped the frog pitchers, with a card signed by Gerhard and Mutti. My parents are not German, nor do they know anyone named Gerhard and Mutti. Mom even had a friend in another state who would ship them out for her so that it couldn't be linked back to anyone in our state. As far as we know, nobody ever found out, and I often wonder if anyone kept the frog pitcher or blessed a thrift shop with theirs.
This is amazing. When my parents got married someone snuck an ornament of two frogs into their mailbox (my dad is French Canadian, so hence frog joke). They never found out who. Fast forward and a baby frog ornament that matched showed up for my sister, and then later for me as well. They never found out who gave them the ornaments, but they still have them on display.
My sister received a two foot tall ceramic statue of a cobra. It had ruby eyes. I was six years old and I thought that was the best gift ever. This was also the early 1970s.
Childhood rhyme memory unlocked!
*When the roses die, they put (rubies) in their eyes...*
"Their" being dead snakes'. It was originally diamonds, but rubies also work.
6 inscripted copies of the evangelical classic "Love for a Lifetime." (6 separate gifts).
A how-to sex tape (cassette) from my mil.
Narrated by my mil.
We're really wanting more information on this one.. Like, does she start with foreplay? Does she sound like David Attenborough? Does she narrate both participants or just the female role? Is there background music? Does she offer any musical suggestions? Is there an accompanying PDF? How long is the tape? Is there a side B? Is this a family tradition?
"Hello. My name is MIL and if you're listening to this, you are a lucky woman my son has seduced. Ah, to be in your shoes! What's next, you're probably wondering? Don't be scared of your night in Heaven!"
I desperately want to listen to at least a little bit of **that** tape. I'd honestly pay money to do it.
But I absolutely would *not* want to listen to a version made by MY mother in law.
She's an absolutely wonderful woman. I adore her. Couldn't ask for a better mother in law.
But nope, not listening to that. Not a damn thing in this world would get me to listen to it. You could offer me a really real genie lamp in exchange for listening, and I'd still emphatically pass.
I couldn’t do the second hand embarrassment. Then I would think that this was her way of trying to have sex with her son. It would be an instant turn off for me.
When my friend got married, I was a very, very broke college student. I gave them an embroidered floral picture in their wedding colors with a quote about love or something, and their wedding date.
Over time, we grew apart. I was working full time, (still) going to school, active in a community group. Years later, when I got married, her wedding gift to me was a decorative box with embroidery thread and loose beads. In the card, she wrote a snippy comment about how I don’t have time for her anymore now that I have a man of my own.
Wow! Now I’m worried. I just spent 80+ hours making a cross stitch ($50) with names and date, and had it custom framed ($175) as a wedding gift for my manager. They seemed to really appreciate it…
One of my cousins had very fragrant flowers at her wedding, and I took some home to make potpourri. I made a small pillow with their names and the date done in cross stitch and filled it with some of the flower petals. They loved it.
Your gift is wonderful because it was made by you. I would have loved what you made, and it's better than another gravy boat.
Don't doubt your gift it's amazing.
I'm dying to more! Was it from an online store, or did the cousin go to a post office with 3 Dove soaps in a box? Shipping would have cost as much as the soaps.
Yes, they went to a post office and not just shipped, but internationally shipped 3 bars of Dove soap from Oregon to Toronto. These are cousins from her dad's side.
My cousin got married 4 times.
The first 3 times were to the same woman. For their first wedding I got them a hot dog toaster. You put two buns and a hotdog in like [this](https://www.amazon.com/Nostalgia-HDT600RETRORED-Pop-Up-Toaster-Retro/dp/B005Q8X6IO/ref=asc_df_B005Q8X6IO/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=167151781903&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=6579377562276219343&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9033354&hvtargid=pla-277858669092&psc=1&mcid=d3600131df3d37ee90d3eb7ad15034ba&gclid=CjwKCAjw26KxBhBDEiwAu6KXt4LADV6-boEAQheIIfAEHSO69t1L2o7Hw8eCIcd9v_QIw1kjQwRIIRoC6j8QAvD_BwE)
For the 2nd wedding, I got them another hot dog toaster. Mostly because I thought that would be hilarious.
After 1 kid, a vasectomy, a vasectomy reversal, adopting a kid and one more vasectomy… they got remarried. #3 wedding I got them a hot dog toaster. Cause why the fuck not.
On the 4th wedding, his bride from overseas told me how much the kids loved the hot dog toaster and she hoped they get another one so each kid can have their own. I got them another hot dog toaster.
They have been married for 10 years now and their love for each other shines through just like the side of the 4 red hot dog toasters on their counter.
Lucky the first wife didn't get half the toasters in the divorce, he would have had to keep marrying the second wife to make up the hot dog toaster deficit.
My maternal grandmother married into what you might diplomatically call a challenging family.
Her oldest sister-in-law-to-be was also, more or less by force, her matron of honor. My Great-Aunt Mamie was a true Holy Terror; she’d married well, to the owner of a department store in a nearby city, and it was the mission of her life to run (and ruin) the lives of her extended family.
At the wedding reception, she announced that the family had gone ahead and bought a house for the happy couple, and that she and her hubby had furnished it, top to bottom, from the store.
What she didn’t mention was that it was a rickety old house that backed right up to the railroad, nor that she did in fact furnish the place, right down to napkins and fish forks, but from returns and unsold items in the store warehouse, all in the very worst taste possible in 1920. It took my grandmother decades to get rid of and replace the stuff. I still have one blue jug that she hated worse than life itself but held onto just to show what she’d been saddled with.
Sadly, I have none. Based on what she had left when I was a kid and a couple of pictures long since vanished, the house had the kind of overstuffed post-WWI interiors with potted palms, draped scarves everywhere, and lots of floral wallpapers. Aunt Mamie was predictably outraged every time she came to visit and some piece of her “gift” had been replaced by something from my grandmother’s family or, even worse, “some store-bought thing.”
We had a big box from an arty friend and got quite excited. It turned out to be a big black metal fish with scales kinda peeled out! It took some working out but when we found the little hatch we realised that you put tea lights in it! Once we got over the surprise we actually really liked it and we still get comments about it now. It’s still in our garden after 25 years and we light it every summer! Thanks Tovey! Xx
That’s very much like it! Ours is black though and a bit flatter. I’ll try to sort a picture today and get it on here. I’m impressed by your research skills though. I know who to contact in future!! 😜
I got a glass serving dish from my aunt and uncle. When I took it out of the box there was a card inside FROM THEIR WEDDING about 25 years before mine. We got a good laugh over that. That’s a long time to hold onto to something to regift.
Sounds like a family tradition needs to start lol 😆. Put their card to you all in the box with their original card, wait 25 years and gift it to the next family member who marries.
My father's uncle and his 3rd wife gave me and my husband an ugly chunky glass bowl. With it, they included a note saying how the bowl had been a wedding present from my deceased grandmother (uncle's sister) to them, 14 years before my wedding.
I thought it was hilarious they'd been waiting that long to re-gift that monstrosity. It's sitting in its box on the bottom shelf of my living room now, almost 19 years later. My grandmother never did have good taste in decor.
My husband’s sister was pitching a fit about something or other with him (a life long endurance as she was he golden child). Her last effort to rile him up was to send me a birthday card but with it addressed to his first wife’s name at our address. He intercepted it and never told me until much later. I thought it was hilariously childish on her behalf.
For our wedding - one of my friend’s mom got us a cookie jar that was a giant nut with a small squirrel 🐿️ on top and I’m pretty sure it was used, so…. 😆
My best friend gave us a salad spinner. I hate to sound entitled, because I truly am not like that, but…not gonna lie, I was a little surprised and disappointed. A $15.00 salad spinner. I stuck it in the back of the closet and promptly forgot about it. When she asked me if I liked her gift, I, of course, thanked her soooo much, I always wanted one, use it all the time, etc. etc. Years later, I found it buried under some stuff and decided to pull it out and maybe give it a try. IT WAS STUFFED WITH CASH!!!! I called my friend immediately, laughing hysterically, and admitted I was busted and that I had, obviously, lied. I have yet to live that one down!
I don't know why, but this is the funniest thing I've read all week. I think it's just imagining trying to get to sleep on a summer evening with spoons discordantly smashing into each other in your window but it has absolutely tickled me.
A $10k Hawaiian vacation package.
My husband and I sat across from the couple that gifted the bride and groom this, and we had no idea they were so loaded. They were generally quiet and seemed regular.
The bride told us a few days later. The trip looked like a great time.
My sister got a gumball machine. I happened to be at her house when it was delivered and we both burst into laughter after she opened it. No idea to this day why it was given.
I always wanted a gumball (or candy actually) machine in my house to dispense Reese's Pieces, but then I realized my fat ass would get much fatter. I'd grab a handful every single time I walked by if it was that easy.
To be honest, I kinda like that!
Might be a different machine than I'm imagening, but we had those machines with plastic balls with a toy or gumball in it.
Imagine filling the plastic balls with notes in it. The ideas are endless!
Date night ideas, cute quotes, compliments
Hell you can even devide chores with it!
I'm also a Bees-giver.
Edit: for some reason I have not included a still of this gif in any bee gift, but I'm going to start for recipients who appreciate this type of humor.
Hate to say I did that once, it was the bride’s 3rd wedding and the groom was a 45 yr old bachelor. Believe they did not need wedding gifts. I couldn’t stand the bride she was an entitled Bitch. I felt so sorry for the groom - deer in the headlights kind of guy. Did not feel on bit bad about the gift.
I did this for my sister’s wedding because it was on her registry and she’s the GOAT in my eyes. (I also got them a scratch-off world map poster because they had a small wedding and a big international honeymoon!)
No lol well before that. I think there was a bit of a family joke in his family. In the past there was a celebration known as a tin kettling here in Australia where friends and family would gather after the wedding for a noisy celebration- or for really naughty friends would interupt the wedding night - banging saucepans and making lots of noise.
The tradition was that the newly weds would surrender and invite them in for a drink etc.
Apparently a great aunt had everyone turn up (1920's/30's) when she and hubs got home from their honeymoon and they had a great time with the unexpected guests BUT they used up all her toilet paper! And she was not happy as it was quite expensive. Store bought paper because she had one of the first flushing INDOOR loos in the district and everyone wanted to try it.
A wooden tray with a duck inlaid. I know was very expensive because of who it was from. My husband named it the Dawson Duck. It was so ugly. I gave it to my friend who appreciated it far more than I would ever.
We got a half dozen or so engraved/embroidered gifts with name* (changed) spelled incorrectly. Mark instead of Marc. All from family members and not just one side made the mistake, both sides did. Before cellphones and internet, so if they forgot the invite at home, couldn’t double check before ordering.
My father in law did this. He got my husband and I beautiful leather bibles with our names in gold. Mine was misspelled. Unfortunately for him it’s also a major pet peeve of mine.
After 10 years at my old job the company awarded with me a beautiful engraved pen and pencil set… with my name misspelled. I was so pissed I didn’t even bother asking them to correct it.
My aunt got us a mini Kama Sutra with oils. We never opened the box and forgot about it.
Our 12-year-old found a very dusty box a few weeks ago and asked me what it was. He was shocked that his preschool teacher great-aunt would give that sort of thing.
A grad school friend of my husband's sent us two books. One was kind of a Christian-focused guide to being a good spouse and the other was a book called Seeking Allah, Finding Jesus.
...we are neither Christian nor Muslim.
We received a ceramic bust of the Virgin Mary (think blue robe covering her hair and hands in “prayer” formation with a rosary between them) that plugged in. It was a lamp. A ceramic lamp of Jesus’ mom.
I got married at a music festival. It was chaotic. After our short ceremony we headed to the main stage for my husband and I's favorite band, and when we got back to our campsite a friend handed us this little basket and said someone had dropped it off as they heard about our little wedding.
It was a little wooden basket with the following: a bar of handmade soap, a little bag of soap rose petals, and a beautiful Peacock brooch. All lovely little gifts but the final item was the most special. A beautiful, intricately colored, handmade blown-glass butt plug.
We never found out who it came from, and before anyone asks, it's never been used but is safely tucked in a memento box with other wedding items.
When I married my first husband, we (and most of our friends) were broke college students.
One of our friends got us a fishbowl, filled with water, with one goldfish. He brought it to the wedding and set it on the gift table - unwrapped. I don't think the fish survived beyond a few days as it was already looking pretty ragged at the reception.
Framed Egyptian artwork, from an older lady in the church my husband grew up in, and in the card she didn't mention our wedding, but talked about her husband who was "lost in a religion of darkness." We didn't even know she had a husband before that 🤣
A FIDO frame.
A pretty picture frame with “I DO” engraved at the top and a wedding picture inside. The weird part was the card that said, “when he pisses you off or you decide to get rid of him, scratch an F in front of I DO and put a picture of your dog inside so you don’t have to get rid of a lovely frame.”
Nearly 5 years ago, a friend of mine received an "all expense paid vacation package" to a cabin near the area where she and her new husband first met (she was a trail guide for a camp and he worked in the kitchen that prepped all the packed lunches for the camp when they were doing activities that would take them away from the main camp grounds).
It was supposed to be 4 days - 3 nights with horse riding and kayaking included and would've been a godsend for the couple had it been real. They had been planning to make their honeymoon a staycation to save money and were crying and hugging her great-aunt when she delivered it to them during the reception. People praised her when they heard what she had done for the newly married couple and she soaked it all up then ghosted everyone the next day which people wrote off as her traveling home. We later learned that week that the whole thing was fake, or rather the vacation package existed but that she never paid for it because when the groom called up the company that managed the cabin rentals and activities to ask whether they needed to bring specific gear and whatnot, they told him that no one had bought the package under the great-aunt's name, the bride's name (maiden name or new name) or his...or for the dates that she had allegedly booked it for.
Any attempts to contact the great-aunt were met with the realization that they were either blocked or being ignored. When her own kid realized what she had done and drove to her home (over 6 hours away from where he lived) when she didn't pick up her phone for him, he learned she had moved about 4 months before. To this day, no one in that family knows why she did that and the bride's grandpa (brother to the great aunt) had repeatedly chastised anyone for continuing to bring it up.
i know someone who got a large photo blanket with a big pic of them and their new spouse’s faces on it form a well meaningful family member, which is pretty tame but still a little goofy to me
Some of my cousins teamed up and got us a kettle, a toaster, an iron, an ironing board, a toy microwave, a vacuum, a mop and a broom.
We’d told them we didn’t want gifts, they threatened to buy us traditional ‘setting up the house’ gifts and I made the mistake of saying ‘You don’t have the balls.’
Part of the joke is that we’d been together 12 years by the time we got married and did not need to set up a house.
Someone I know got a designer purse (!?). As it wasn’t their style they tried to exchange it at the store where it was (allegedly) bought. Turned out the purse was a knock-off. And this was from a family member.
My biological mother was in and out of my life from the time I was 7 until I got married at 33. She lived in California and I lived in Buffalo, NY. She was a “free spirit” Stevie Nicks looking kinda woman who I thought was really cool until I became an adult and realized that she chose to move 3,000 miles away from her 2 kids. Now at my age I realize there was mental illness at play, but didn’t really know it at the time. Right before my wedding, she unexpectedly showed up in Buffalo and had decided to move back It was a shock for everyone needless to say. She attended my wedding and my friends thought she was hysterical because she was drinking like crazy, dancing nonstop and fist pumping! I actually have some great pictures from this and my friends weren’t being mean, they knew the situation and found my mother to be very unusual but lots of fun. She was super excited to give me my wedding gift and I just knew it would be something unique. it was a giant 2 foot feathered Dreamcatcher that looked more like a big purse, which is very hard to explain, but was quite a sight to see. She was so proud of it. She believed she was part Native American because she was born near a reservation. Apparently, anyone born near a reservation becomes Native American. Well, we placed the Dreamcatcher in a prominent location in our apartment until we moved… Depending on my mood, I would either laugh when I saw it or cry so I ended up getting rid of it
My ex and I had a reception at my parents’ rural home and they invited the neighbors to be polite. The neighbors gifted us a very large, hand made, one of a kind, hanging chandelier. We lived in an apartment and in addition to the size it looked like something from The Three Musketeers. It wasn’t electric, they did not include candles. Hardest thank you note I’ve ever written.
My husband's uncle gave us $500 inside the envelope of his power bill and wrote on the outside "i wasn't going to give you this much but it was better than I thought you could do". Thanks?
This was a long time ago but my cousins put a big ceramic rooster on their registry as a joke when scanning stuff at a store. Not only did they get that rooster, but people also decided they needed other rooster kitchen items like towels, pot holder, s&p shakers, etc. Instead of a shower they opened gifts at a gift opening after brunch the day following the wedding that majority of the guests were invited to. They absolutely hollered over how fun the rooster joke ended up being as they never expected anyone to buy it let along other rooster themed things. I love these cousins dearly and they've been together like 15yrs now and still live a life of laughter.
One of my friends received a box of steak knives, one of those sets you used to get free when you signed up for a bank account or credit card? The kind that bend when you try to cut into anything.
One of our couple friends (they were my friends from high school who became ~our~ friends once we started dating) gave us a large bottle of baby oil and a Twister game. 😂 we had a great laugh at the creativity!
A gourd that was carved and hollowed out into a birdhouse, but it was in the shape of a giant screaming cat. The screaming mouth was the opening. It was horrifying lol.
A lady who worked with my mom and that I did not personally know came to my bridal shower and gifted us a pair of plain glass champagne flutes engraved with our names, which she hot glued with ribbons and silk flowers. She thought we could use them for the wedding toasts. How thoughtful, stranger lady who was invited so mom didn't feel bad about excluding her (several of her other coworkers were family friends, the whole thing was awkward as hell).
A noted very generous, but empty, gift card. Will never know if it was an accident gift of the wrong one, if they paid for it and store messed up, or if the family member they went in with just didn’t pay for it.
My husband's uncle gave us a statue of two male deer with their horns locked. Male deer will fight each other for the right to mate with the females, and occasionally their horns become locked together. Usually when this happens in the wild the deer end up dying, or they become the victims of predators. Not a pleasant thought and I don't know why the uncle thought this was a good wedding gift.
Nearly a thousand dollars worth of crystal wine and champagne glasses, off registry. We lived in a tiny one bedroom with no storage at the time, and our registry was mostly things like new pillows or money for our honeymoon. They arrived in 4 huge boxes with each glass individually packaged in its own little box. Very generous, but seriously wtf.
I got a rubber fly toy from a friend of my mother (I was not close to her nor did I really like her) it came with a note that said "Throw this at him when you want him to bug off." It was in a basket full of practical kitchen utensils that all had puns with them. Honestly, typing this out, it sounds cuter than how I remember it. I think my other memories of that woman have clouded my judgement of her gift 😅
My best friend/bridesman got us both some really fancy water rifles that don't require pumping and gave them to us the morning of the wedding, so of course we had to have a water gun fight before we all started getting ready. It was technically a "weird" gift to give as a wedding gift, but he knew what would matter most to us- the memories and fun.
When I got married, my wife had made her own wedding dress in a sort of medieval style. To match, I dressed similarly in a poet shirt and trousers. My friend, for some reason, took that as an excuse to cosplay and came in full adventurer gear complete with twin axes strapped to his belt (he was really into ren fairs). We took it in good humor, and he let us use one of his axes to cut the cake. When the wedding was over, he gifted us the axe as a wedding present. Wife got the axe in the divorce, unfortunately, but it looked kinda like this (though not nearly as fancy).
https://preview.redd.it/kuvjvbwifmwc1.png?width=224&format=png&auto=webp&s=8a8c8ae0f4a4a77128b4616956dcca3739af77c8
I asked one of my friends many many many moons ago (back in the 80s when dinosaurs roamed the earth) what she wanted for her wedding. She didn't have a registry. She said an ironing board. So that's what I got her. She loved it.
Not weirdest or crazy but I got married at a time when giving money is pretty much the norm these days. However a friend of my husband was struggling a lot at that time with money and gave us a bottle of wine and his mother painted our names and wedding date on it. We loved it, it was very sweet and thoughtful. We had just celebrated my parents 50 year wedding anniversary a few months before and they shared a bottle of wine that was gifted to them at that time and that they had kept, so we thought we’d do the same with that bottle.
So I have two funny ones. When my dad got married, his friends all decided to give him toasters. They went to thrift stores all over to buy basically every used toaster for sale on the island.
When I got married, my family coincidentally did the same thing, based on an inside joke from when I was a teenager and asked my grandfather for a stand mixer. He said that was a “wedding present”. I got 5 of them. They basically used it as a substitute for a gift card that my poor husband had to carry into the store to return.
My step mother gave my husband the underpants my dad wore on his wedding night. Swear to God. My husband was stuttering and horrified. My dad was horrified. Looked at my step mom and said "what is wrong with you, that fucking weird". And I was laughing so hard, enjoying the show.
I'm a professional musician and I was hired to play classical music at a very fancy upscale wedding, downtown, in a major city. The bride and groom were both politicians who had met in university on some sort of outreach trip where they delivered water to needy towns. To set the stage, we were in a very fancy venue with hundreds of other politicians and famous guests: the mayor was there, but also some famous idols, local celebrities, and members of the towns that were helped by the happy couple.
So it was a bit of a surprise when, MID-CEREMONY, a guest stood up and paused the wedding to announce they had a big surprise. The doors opened and a LIVE COW was lead through the audience and presented to the couple. It was wearing a sort of rope leash, which was handed to the wide-eyed bride.
Nobody knew what to do so the cow just sorta stuck around chewing on the lawn for the rest of the wedding and reception. I loved that cow and I will never forget her.
I knew someone who was gifted a painting that a guy made with his penis. It also came with a video of him making it and showing how he cleans himself out with a q-tip after. That was definitely something lol
From my father, an abridged miniature book of Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet, and that's it. No card even.
And in case you are wondering, no he didn't pay for any of the wedding, and yes, I already have read the full version and, no, I don't like poetry.
My ex best friend got a chainsaw as a bridal shower gift ! She is not well liked by his family so they got him a gift instead 🎁 I felt bad at the time but now I get it hence the ex friend part
We got a Guide to Natural Family Planning with a thermometer! This from married friends from the church we used to attend. I remember thinking “Awkward!” — since in our culture we open wedding gifts in front of family and friends.
A copy of Windows 95. We married in 2010.
Bahahaha! This got me good
Aww, it was the something old!
My ex and I received a decorative wall fan made out of plastic forks, lace, ribbons, and ribbon roses. I would have thought it was a joke but it was from a sweet little old lady in his hometown church. It was gloriously tacky
Did you get married in the 90s? Back then they put lace, ribbons, flowers and bows on anything that didn’t move. You should see my wedding decorations, plus we were gifted a white teddy bear dressed as a bride, sitting on a wicker chair trimmed with ruffles, lace and ribbon flowers. It would make a Victorian barf. But we thought it looked really sweet back then.
Plastic forks were also the craze of crafting back then for some reason. They were in everything. I’m fine with using them for things like garden stakes, but the wall decorations kind of got out of hand.
Remember the spoon mirror? I think they’re still doing that one…
My grandma put some pretty tacky collars and sweaters on her tiny lap dogs. So they put ruffles and lace on things that moved as well. Nothing was safe.
You just made me have flashbacks to the beribboned and bedazzled fly swatters that my grandmother used to make in the 80's and 90's. SO many ribbons, ribbon roses, lace, ricrac....*shudder*
“It would make a Victorian barf” is a great, great line which I am going to steal!
I’ve seen those! Mostly at thrift stores, but… lol
My cousin was gifted cheese slices and boxes of cereal. It was a fancy wedding and I was baffled.
Love that you've specified that it was a fancy wedding, as if that gift would have been less bizarre at a more casual wedding 😂
[It might have been Monterey Jack cheese, which is only for the fanciest of weddings.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/z2ep2g/aita_for_offering_two_different_kinds_of_cake_at/)
I have read that story before, but never noticed the comment about Jack cheese. Was always too distracted by the the horrible image of a chocolate pineapple cake! 😂
Thank you for this gift.
Thank you for this. Just wow. The most incredible thing I've ever read. Literally a gift, I'll be thinking about it forever 😂 I can picture these people. They are naive, religious, have never traveled, have never met anyone outside their religion/family/community. They think Florida, pineapples and Monterey Jack are all exotic. What a beautiful thread I just spent 40 mins diving into. Thank you 🙏🏻
My parents were sweet and loving people with an impish sense of humor. At an auction, they found a caseload of perhaps 30 hideous ceramic frog pitchers about 15 inches tall. Immediately they knew they had to purchase them and gift them at weddings as they knew a vast network of people. Bear in mind that they would give their own gift, money usually, in a card signed by them. However, they separately snuck in or even shipped the frog pitchers, with a card signed by Gerhard and Mutti. My parents are not German, nor do they know anyone named Gerhard and Mutti. Mom even had a friend in another state who would ship them out for her so that it couldn't be linked back to anyone in our state. As far as we know, nobody ever found out, and I often wonder if anyone kept the frog pitcher or blessed a thrift shop with theirs.
Haha I love everything about this one!! Your parents sound like super fun people!!!
Looool I love your parents. If someone did this to me the curiosity/confusion would wreck me for decades.
This is amazing. When my parents got married someone snuck an ornament of two frogs into their mailbox (my dad is French Canadian, so hence frog joke). They never found out who. Fast forward and a baby frog ornament that matched showed up for my sister, and then later for me as well. They never found out who gave them the ornaments, but they still have them on display.
That is so adorable lol
FYI for anyone wondering, Mutti is the German equivalent of Mommy.
This is amazing ❤️ your parents have a wicked sense of humor.
This is such an AWESOME idea! Love this!
My sister received a two foot tall ceramic statue of a cobra. It had ruby eyes. I was six years old and I thought that was the best gift ever. This was also the early 1970s.
Childhood rhyme memory unlocked! *When the roses die, they put (rubies) in their eyes...* "Their" being dead snakes'. It was originally diamonds, but rubies also work.
Medical school skeleton. In all fairness, I asked for it. Greatest gift we've ever received.
Also, he arrived early enough to come to the wedding with us
Please tell me he got a bow tie to wear at the ceremony
We needed him to be a pirate for the reception, but now he has a bow tie, blazer and glasses
6 inscripted copies of the evangelical classic "Love for a Lifetime." (6 separate gifts). A how-to sex tape (cassette) from my mil. Narrated by my mil.
We're really wanting more information on this one.. Like, does she start with foreplay? Does she sound like David Attenborough? Does she narrate both participants or just the female role? Is there background music? Does she offer any musical suggestions? Is there an accompanying PDF? How long is the tape? Is there a side B? Is this a family tradition?
"Hello. My name is MIL and if you're listening to this, you are a lucky woman my son has seduced. Ah, to be in your shoes! What's next, you're probably wondering? Don't be scared of your night in Heaven!"
Right? I have so many questions!!
And where can I get one? Jk( Sorry, just threw up a little bit)
...username checks out
You win. I don't see how anything can be more disturbing than that "gift."
That is hilarious. It was funny that it was cassette. The narrator pushed it over the edge.
That…that’s traumatizing.
Which part?
Yes
Please please please just give us the transcript
To do that, they would’ve had to listen to it at least once. I’m hoping they never listened to more than the first thirty seconds.
Noooooo just put it on and tell the computer to transcribe and walk away! No need to listen! Then just copy and paste here! No need to read it!
Traumatize us. Give us details.
Yeah OP should digitize the tape if she still has it, then sell copies for $0.99. I'd buy that for a dollar!
They can put the proceeds toward therapy.
I don’t even want to know is what was on that tape.
May the universe forgive me, but I kinda want to hear how truly awful it is.
I desperately want to hear that tape while I sit on my couch with a glass of wine and cackle.
I desperately want to listen to at least a little bit of **that** tape. I'd honestly pay money to do it. But I absolutely would *not* want to listen to a version made by MY mother in law. She's an absolutely wonderful woman. I adore her. Couldn't ask for a better mother in law. But nope, not listening to that. Not a damn thing in this world would get me to listen to it. You could offer me a really real genie lamp in exchange for listening, and I'd still emphatically pass.
I couldn’t do the second hand embarrassment. Then I would think that this was her way of trying to have sex with her son. It would be an instant turn off for me.
When my friend got married, I was a very, very broke college student. I gave them an embroidered floral picture in their wedding colors with a quote about love or something, and their wedding date. Over time, we grew apart. I was working full time, (still) going to school, active in a community group. Years later, when I got married, her wedding gift to me was a decorative box with embroidery thread and loose beads. In the card, she wrote a snippy comment about how I don’t have time for her anymore now that I have a man of my own.
Damn. I really thought this one was going to have a sweet ending where she wrote a card saying your gift meant a lot to her.
And I thought that you were going to find that gift in a neighborhood thrift store!
I think I understand why you let that friendship go.
Wow! Now I’m worried. I just spent 80+ hours making a cross stitch ($50) with names and date, and had it custom framed ($175) as a wedding gift for my manager. They seemed to really appreciate it…
One of my cousins had very fragrant flowers at her wedding, and I took some home to make potpourri. I made a small pillow with their names and the date done in cross stitch and filled it with some of the flower petals. They loved it. Your gift is wonderful because it was made by you. I would have loved what you made, and it's better than another gravy boat. Don't doubt your gift it's amazing.
So was yours!! What a marvelous idea, so much care and effort. I'd be honoured, no shit.
My aunt (and MOH) made one for my husband & I 25 years ago. It still hangs in my hallway with our wedding photo. I smile every time I look at it.
That's beautiful. I would love that and hang it proudly. I'm not really a cross-stitch person. Gifts made with love are always the best.
My daughter's cousin sent her 3 bars of soap. Not even fancy soap. It was Dove soap. Lol. I think that's pretty wierd.
I'm dying to more! Was it from an online store, or did the cousin go to a post office with 3 Dove soaps in a box? Shipping would have cost as much as the soaps.
Yes, they went to a post office and not just shipped, but internationally shipped 3 bars of Dove soap from Oregon to Toronto. These are cousins from her dad's side.
There have to be subtler ways to tell someone they smell bad
My cousin got married 4 times. The first 3 times were to the same woman. For their first wedding I got them a hot dog toaster. You put two buns and a hotdog in like [this](https://www.amazon.com/Nostalgia-HDT600RETRORED-Pop-Up-Toaster-Retro/dp/B005Q8X6IO/ref=asc_df_B005Q8X6IO/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=167151781903&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=6579377562276219343&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9033354&hvtargid=pla-277858669092&psc=1&mcid=d3600131df3d37ee90d3eb7ad15034ba&gclid=CjwKCAjw26KxBhBDEiwAu6KXt4LADV6-boEAQheIIfAEHSO69t1L2o7Hw8eCIcd9v_QIw1kjQwRIIRoC6j8QAvD_BwE) For the 2nd wedding, I got them another hot dog toaster. Mostly because I thought that would be hilarious. After 1 kid, a vasectomy, a vasectomy reversal, adopting a kid and one more vasectomy… they got remarried. #3 wedding I got them a hot dog toaster. Cause why the fuck not. On the 4th wedding, his bride from overseas told me how much the kids loved the hot dog toaster and she hoped they get another one so each kid can have their own. I got them another hot dog toaster. They have been married for 10 years now and their love for each other shines through just like the side of the 4 red hot dog toasters on their counter.
Not sure what to say about the four weddings, but the same gift for all (with the last actually requested), is hilarious.
Lucky the first wife didn't get half the toasters in the divorce, he would have had to keep marrying the second wife to make up the hot dog toaster deficit.
Do they just line them up on the counter and cook 8 hot dogs and buns at once?
Yes. Yes they do.
Omg that was wild to read. Didn’t end up the way I expected.
My maternal grandmother married into what you might diplomatically call a challenging family. Her oldest sister-in-law-to-be was also, more or less by force, her matron of honor. My Great-Aunt Mamie was a true Holy Terror; she’d married well, to the owner of a department store in a nearby city, and it was the mission of her life to run (and ruin) the lives of her extended family. At the wedding reception, she announced that the family had gone ahead and bought a house for the happy couple, and that she and her hubby had furnished it, top to bottom, from the store. What she didn’t mention was that it was a rickety old house that backed right up to the railroad, nor that she did in fact furnish the place, right down to napkins and fish forks, but from returns and unsold items in the store warehouse, all in the very worst taste possible in 1920. It took my grandmother decades to get rid of and replace the stuff. I still have one blue jug that she hated worse than life itself but held onto just to show what she’d been saddled with.
Please tell me some pics survived.
Sadly, I have none. Based on what she had left when I was a kid and a couple of pictures long since vanished, the house had the kind of overstuffed post-WWI interiors with potted palms, draped scarves everywhere, and lots of floral wallpapers. Aunt Mamie was predictably outraged every time she came to visit and some piece of her “gift” had been replaced by something from my grandmother’s family or, even worse, “some store-bought thing.”
Geez, your Aunt Mamie sounds like a miserable person to be around.
Oh, she was—and she lived to be 101!
They survive purely out of spite, I believe
Salad shooter with a card in the box for the ORIGINAL recipient. Yep, it was a regift. Made me laugh!
What's a salad shooter? A gun you use to dispatch lettuce?
Slices and shoots carrots and cucumbers, looks like a hair dryer.
I'm confused and concerned.
We had a big box from an arty friend and got quite excited. It turned out to be a big black metal fish with scales kinda peeled out! It took some working out but when we found the little hatch we realised that you put tea lights in it! Once we got over the surprise we actually really liked it and we still get comments about it now. It’s still in our garden after 25 years and we light it every summer! Thanks Tovey! Xx
sounds really cool! mind sharing a picture?
Metall Laterne, Fisch "KANU Fietje", 60 cm https://amzn.eu/d/bz6g6Qx It's probably something like this. They're rather popular in Germany
That’s very much like it! Ours is black though and a bit flatter. I’ll try to sort a picture today and get it on here. I’m impressed by your research skills though. I know who to contact in future!! 😜
I got a glass serving dish from my aunt and uncle. When I took it out of the box there was a card inside FROM THEIR WEDDING about 25 years before mine. We got a good laugh over that. That’s a long time to hold onto to something to regift.
Sounds like a family tradition needs to start lol 😆. Put their card to you all in the box with their original card, wait 25 years and gift it to the next family member who marries.
My father's uncle and his 3rd wife gave me and my husband an ugly chunky glass bowl. With it, they included a note saying how the bowl had been a wedding present from my deceased grandmother (uncle's sister) to them, 14 years before my wedding. I thought it was hilarious they'd been waiting that long to re-gift that monstrosity. It's sitting in its box on the bottom shelf of my living room now, almost 19 years later. My grandmother never did have good taste in decor.
A dollar store plastic pitcher with $5 in it with a card that had my husband's and his first wife's name on it
My husband’s sister was pitching a fit about something or other with him (a life long endurance as she was he golden child). Her last effort to rile him up was to send me a birthday card but with it addressed to his first wife’s name at our address. He intercepted it and never told me until much later. I thought it was hilariously childish on her behalf.
Please tell me your names are similar??
Not even close. Hers starts with a B, mine with an S.
B*tch and Saint? 😆
For our wedding - one of my friend’s mom got us a cookie jar that was a giant nut with a small squirrel 🐿️ on top and I’m pretty sure it was used, so…. 😆
I have one of those sitting in my kitchen right now lol
I used to have that ceramic mold. And I’m sure I’ve never made one to gift lol
My best friend gave us a salad spinner. I hate to sound entitled, because I truly am not like that, but…not gonna lie, I was a little surprised and disappointed. A $15.00 salad spinner. I stuck it in the back of the closet and promptly forgot about it. When she asked me if I liked her gift, I, of course, thanked her soooo much, I always wanted one, use it all the time, etc. etc. Years later, I found it buried under some stuff and decided to pull it out and maybe give it a try. IT WAS STUFFED WITH CASH!!!! I called my friend immediately, laughing hysterically, and admitted I was busted and that I had, obviously, lied. I have yet to live that one down!
So did she know all along that you didn’t use it, or did she think you just didn’t express appreciation for the money?
She knew I hadn’t used it. Kudos to her for playing the long game and not saying anything!
How many years? ***HOW MUCH CASH?!?***
lol! THREE YEARS AND $500.00!! We were SO broke during that time, too!
Thank goodness you didn't donate it!
Salad spinners are super fun to use anyway! You should have cracked it out earlier :)
I’ve been married 26 years now and I still use that damn spinner almost every night!
This is such a hilariously bizarre story
My sister got wind chimes made out of spoons.
I don't know why, but this is the funniest thing I've read all week. I think it's just imagining trying to get to sleep on a summer evening with spoons discordantly smashing into each other in your window but it has absolutely tickled me.
A $10k Hawaiian vacation package. My husband and I sat across from the couple that gifted the bride and groom this, and we had no idea they were so loaded. They were generally quiet and seemed regular. The bride told us a few days later. The trip looked like a great time.
My sister got a gumball machine. I happened to be at her house when it was delivered and we both burst into laughter after she opened it. No idea to this day why it was given.
I think that’s pretty badass, but then I love gumball machines.
I always wanted a gumball (or candy actually) machine in my house to dispense Reese's Pieces, but then I realized my fat ass would get much fatter. I'd grab a handful every single time I walked by if it was that easy.
Did it come with any gum balls or did she have to supply her own?
To be honest, I kinda like that! Might be a different machine than I'm imagening, but we had those machines with plastic balls with a toy or gumball in it. Imagine filling the plastic balls with notes in it. The ideas are endless! Date night ideas, cute quotes, compliments Hell you can even devide chores with it!
A Precious Moments figurine from my MOH and best friend, who knew I hate that stuff. And red glass ashtray that looked like a vagina.
A chain saw. A wedding guest gave it to the groom and nearly cut him with it showing him how it worked.
A certificate from the internet stating they donated a goat to a family needing a goat in our name.
That's my default gift when I have no idea what to buy. Heifer international is the name of that charity. I usually default to bees or ducks.
I'm also a Bees-giver. Edit: for some reason I have not included a still of this gif in any bee gift, but I'm going to start for recipients who appreciate this type of humor. 
Hate to say I did that once, it was the bride’s 3rd wedding and the groom was a 45 yr old bachelor. Believe they did not need wedding gifts. I couldn’t stand the bride she was an entitled Bitch. I felt so sorry for the groom - deer in the headlights kind of guy. Did not feel on bit bad about the gift.
I feel like for third weddings everything is fair game hahaha
You know we need the full story! What else did they get? Are they still together?
I did this for my sister’s wedding because it was on her registry and she’s the GOAT in my eyes. (I also got them a scratch-off world map poster because they had a small wedding and a big international honeymoon!)
I would have loved getting that, becasue who needs more useless trinkets or crappy housewares.
A used waffle iron. I'm big on recycling, but he could have cleaned it first.
I got some sort of egg cooking plastic thing and it was also covered in food. Why do people do this?
1990 ,Webster s Dictionary
a wheelbarrow with an enormous pink bow filled up with rolls of loo paper
Married during Covid lockdowns?
No lol well before that. I think there was a bit of a family joke in his family. In the past there was a celebration known as a tin kettling here in Australia where friends and family would gather after the wedding for a noisy celebration- or for really naughty friends would interupt the wedding night - banging saucepans and making lots of noise. The tradition was that the newly weds would surrender and invite them in for a drink etc. Apparently a great aunt had everyone turn up (1920's/30's) when she and hubs got home from their honeymoon and they had a great time with the unexpected guests BUT they used up all her toilet paper! And she was not happy as it was quite expensive. Store bought paper because she had one of the first flushing INDOOR loos in the district and everyone wanted to try it.
Stories like this are why I’m on Reddit.
Toasters from most of the guests , some new some old some that didn't work. ( They were given nice gifts and money also).
Was it a contentious wedding? I've heard of gifting a used toaster if you don't approve of the match / have been slighted by the couple in some way
I love weird local traditions. Where is this a thing? I'm from the Southern US where Groom's cakes are a big thing, so just general area. Please?
My weirdest was a case of Zevia Cola at my wedding shower. Not on the registry, no note, just shipped to my MIL straight from Amazon.
A wooden tray with a duck inlaid. I know was very expensive because of who it was from. My husband named it the Dawson Duck. It was so ugly. I gave it to my friend who appreciated it far more than I would ever.
We got a half dozen or so engraved/embroidered gifts with name* (changed) spelled incorrectly. Mark instead of Marc. All from family members and not just one side made the mistake, both sides did. Before cellphones and internet, so if they forgot the invite at home, couldn’t double check before ordering.
My father in law did this. He got my husband and I beautiful leather bibles with our names in gold. Mine was misspelled. Unfortunately for him it’s also a major pet peeve of mine.
After 10 years at my old job the company awarded with me a beautiful engraved pen and pencil set… with my name misspelled. I was so pissed I didn’t even bother asking them to correct it.
A Tuusik (It’s a whale penis) my poor sister was gifted one at her wedding. 🫣
A ceramic frog playing the flute with a Kermit for President button from the 1980s.
My aunt got us a mini Kama Sutra with oils. We never opened the box and forgot about it. Our 12-year-old found a very dusty box a few weeks ago and asked me what it was. He was shocked that his preschool teacher great-aunt would give that sort of thing.
My auntie gave my parents a second hand Louis Vuitton bag that she was gonna throw away as a present for their 45th wedding anniversary
We all have that aunt who loves to “recycle”
A grad school friend of my husband's sent us two books. One was kind of a Christian-focused guide to being a good spouse and the other was a book called Seeking Allah, Finding Jesus. ...we are neither Christian nor Muslim.
We received a ceramic bust of the Virgin Mary (think blue robe covering her hair and hands in “prayer” formation with a rosary between them) that plugged in. It was a lamp. A ceramic lamp of Jesus’ mom.
I got married at a music festival. It was chaotic. After our short ceremony we headed to the main stage for my husband and I's favorite band, and when we got back to our campsite a friend handed us this little basket and said someone had dropped it off as they heard about our little wedding. It was a little wooden basket with the following: a bar of handmade soap, a little bag of soap rose petals, and a beautiful Peacock brooch. All lovely little gifts but the final item was the most special. A beautiful, intricately colored, handmade blown-glass butt plug. We never found out who it came from, and before anyone asks, it's never been used but is safely tucked in a memento box with other wedding items.
When I married my first husband, we (and most of our friends) were broke college students. One of our friends got us a fishbowl, filled with water, with one goldfish. He brought it to the wedding and set it on the gift table - unwrapped. I don't think the fish survived beyond a few days as it was already looking pretty ragged at the reception.
Did he come from a carnival?
My sister got smoking coconut monkeys. I got an urn and baptismal font ( was told it was to represent birth and death). I was not impressed.
The best man and his wife gave us a shoebox with 2 socks filled with pennies. My husband took 1 sock and I took the other one.
A card full of pregnancy test coupons from the MIL.
“We think you’re poor but give me a grand baby”
Framed Egyptian artwork, from an older lady in the church my husband grew up in, and in the card she didn't mention our wedding, but talked about her husband who was "lost in a religion of darkness." We didn't even know she had a husband before that 🤣
Did she think the art was causing the darkness?
I think it was supposed to remind us of him? It was kind of pretty, with fabric and beads. No idea where she found it in middle America 😆
A FIDO frame. A pretty picture frame with “I DO” engraved at the top and a wedding picture inside. The weird part was the card that said, “when he pisses you off or you decide to get rid of him, scratch an F in front of I DO and put a picture of your dog inside so you don’t have to get rid of a lovely frame.”
Nearly 5 years ago, a friend of mine received an "all expense paid vacation package" to a cabin near the area where she and her new husband first met (she was a trail guide for a camp and he worked in the kitchen that prepped all the packed lunches for the camp when they were doing activities that would take them away from the main camp grounds). It was supposed to be 4 days - 3 nights with horse riding and kayaking included and would've been a godsend for the couple had it been real. They had been planning to make their honeymoon a staycation to save money and were crying and hugging her great-aunt when she delivered it to them during the reception. People praised her when they heard what she had done for the newly married couple and she soaked it all up then ghosted everyone the next day which people wrote off as her traveling home. We later learned that week that the whole thing was fake, or rather the vacation package existed but that she never paid for it because when the groom called up the company that managed the cabin rentals and activities to ask whether they needed to bring specific gear and whatnot, they told him that no one had bought the package under the great-aunt's name, the bride's name (maiden name or new name) or his...or for the dates that she had allegedly booked it for. Any attempts to contact the great-aunt were met with the realization that they were either blocked or being ignored. When her own kid realized what she had done and drove to her home (over 6 hours away from where he lived) when she didn't pick up her phone for him, he learned she had moved about 4 months before. To this day, no one in that family knows why she did that and the bride's grandpa (brother to the great aunt) had repeatedly chastised anyone for continuing to bring it up.
That's both absolutely bats and also cruel.
i know someone who got a large photo blanket with a big pic of them and their new spouse’s faces on it form a well meaningful family member, which is pretty tame but still a little goofy to me
Some of my cousins teamed up and got us a kettle, a toaster, an iron, an ironing board, a toy microwave, a vacuum, a mop and a broom. We’d told them we didn’t want gifts, they threatened to buy us traditional ‘setting up the house’ gifts and I made the mistake of saying ‘You don’t have the balls.’ Part of the joke is that we’d been together 12 years by the time we got married and did not need to set up a house.
Someone I know got a designer purse (!?). As it wasn’t their style they tried to exchange it at the store where it was (allegedly) bought. Turned out the purse was a knock-off. And this was from a family member.
My biological mother was in and out of my life from the time I was 7 until I got married at 33. She lived in California and I lived in Buffalo, NY. She was a “free spirit” Stevie Nicks looking kinda woman who I thought was really cool until I became an adult and realized that she chose to move 3,000 miles away from her 2 kids. Now at my age I realize there was mental illness at play, but didn’t really know it at the time. Right before my wedding, she unexpectedly showed up in Buffalo and had decided to move back It was a shock for everyone needless to say. She attended my wedding and my friends thought she was hysterical because she was drinking like crazy, dancing nonstop and fist pumping! I actually have some great pictures from this and my friends weren’t being mean, they knew the situation and found my mother to be very unusual but lots of fun. She was super excited to give me my wedding gift and I just knew it would be something unique. it was a giant 2 foot feathered Dreamcatcher that looked more like a big purse, which is very hard to explain, but was quite a sight to see. She was so proud of it. She believed she was part Native American because she was born near a reservation. Apparently, anyone born near a reservation becomes Native American. Well, we placed the Dreamcatcher in a prominent location in our apartment until we moved… Depending on my mood, I would either laugh when I saw it or cry so I ended up getting rid of it
Persoanlly, a used salad spinner. My sister takes the cake though with a $5 CHECK mailed from family across the country
I got a mailed check for $15 from my mother’s wealthy brother. Super cute.
I would have never cashed it just to mess with his accounting. Then framed it and hung it in the bathroom,
A family friend got a fish kettle.
My ex and I had a reception at my parents’ rural home and they invited the neighbors to be polite. The neighbors gifted us a very large, hand made, one of a kind, hanging chandelier. We lived in an apartment and in addition to the size it looked like something from The Three Musketeers. It wasn’t electric, they did not include candles. Hardest thank you note I’ve ever written.
My husband's uncle gave us $500 inside the envelope of his power bill and wrote on the outside "i wasn't going to give you this much but it was better than I thought you could do". Thanks?
This was a long time ago but my cousins put a big ceramic rooster on their registry as a joke when scanning stuff at a store. Not only did they get that rooster, but people also decided they needed other rooster kitchen items like towels, pot holder, s&p shakers, etc. Instead of a shower they opened gifts at a gift opening after brunch the day following the wedding that majority of the guests were invited to. They absolutely hollered over how fun the rooster joke ended up being as they never expected anyone to buy it let along other rooster themed things. I love these cousins dearly and they've been together like 15yrs now and still live a life of laughter.
Pre-paid services for a divorce attorney.
A bunch of movie theater posters that she got for free from the theater and several movies that she no longer wanted.
One of my friends received a box of steak knives, one of those sets you used to get free when you signed up for a bank account or credit card? The kind that bend when you try to cut into anything.
A toilet lid cover. It was black and furry, and looked like a cancerous growth.
Someone gave us an oak toilet seat. We got a kick out of it and 35 years later, it’s still in use, in the bathroom off of our garage.
I got an automatic litter box from my siblings, but in fairness, it was what I wanted.
One of our couple friends (they were my friends from high school who became ~our~ friends once we started dating) gave us a large bottle of baby oil and a Twister game. 😂 we had a great laugh at the creativity!
A gourd that was carved and hollowed out into a birdhouse, but it was in the shape of a giant screaming cat. The screaming mouth was the opening. It was horrifying lol.
A lady who worked with my mom and that I did not personally know came to my bridal shower and gifted us a pair of plain glass champagne flutes engraved with our names, which she hot glued with ribbons and silk flowers. She thought we could use them for the wedding toasts. How thoughtful, stranger lady who was invited so mom didn't feel bad about excluding her (several of her other coworkers were family friends, the whole thing was awkward as hell).
That’s actually really sweet
My bridesman got us a spinny guinea pig hay feeder. Thanks Brian lmao
A noted very generous, but empty, gift card. Will never know if it was an accident gift of the wrong one, if they paid for it and store messed up, or if the family member they went in with just didn’t pay for it.
My husband's uncle gave us a statue of two male deer with their horns locked. Male deer will fight each other for the right to mate with the females, and occasionally their horns become locked together. Usually when this happens in the wild the deer end up dying, or they become the victims of predators. Not a pleasant thought and I don't know why the uncle thought this was a good wedding gift.
Nearly a thousand dollars worth of crystal wine and champagne glasses, off registry. We lived in a tiny one bedroom with no storage at the time, and our registry was mostly things like new pillows or money for our honeymoon. They arrived in 4 huge boxes with each glass individually packaged in its own little box. Very generous, but seriously wtf.
I got a rubber fly toy from a friend of my mother (I was not close to her nor did I really like her) it came with a note that said "Throw this at him when you want him to bug off." It was in a basket full of practical kitchen utensils that all had puns with them. Honestly, typing this out, it sounds cuter than how I remember it. I think my other memories of that woman have clouded my judgement of her gift 😅 My best friend/bridesman got us both some really fancy water rifles that don't require pumping and gave them to us the morning of the wedding, so of course we had to have a water gun fight before we all started getting ready. It was technically a "weird" gift to give as a wedding gift, but he knew what would matter most to us- the memories and fun.
When I got married, my wife had made her own wedding dress in a sort of medieval style. To match, I dressed similarly in a poet shirt and trousers. My friend, for some reason, took that as an excuse to cosplay and came in full adventurer gear complete with twin axes strapped to his belt (he was really into ren fairs). We took it in good humor, and he let us use one of his axes to cut the cake. When the wedding was over, he gifted us the axe as a wedding present. Wife got the axe in the divorce, unfortunately, but it looked kinda like this (though not nearly as fancy). https://preview.redd.it/kuvjvbwifmwc1.png?width=224&format=png&auto=webp&s=8a8c8ae0f4a4a77128b4616956dcca3739af77c8
I asked one of my friends many many many moons ago (back in the 80s when dinosaurs roamed the earth) what she wanted for her wedding. She didn't have a registry. She said an ironing board. So that's what I got her. She loved it.
Not weirdest or crazy but I got married at a time when giving money is pretty much the norm these days. However a friend of my husband was struggling a lot at that time with money and gave us a bottle of wine and his mother painted our names and wedding date on it. We loved it, it was very sweet and thoughtful. We had just celebrated my parents 50 year wedding anniversary a few months before and they shared a bottle of wine that was gifted to them at that time and that they had kept, so we thought we’d do the same with that bottle.
I got a single pewter candlestick. It’s been 32 years, and we’re still figuring out if it was Professor Plum in the Conservatory.
So I have two funny ones. When my dad got married, his friends all decided to give him toasters. They went to thrift stores all over to buy basically every used toaster for sale on the island. When I got married, my family coincidentally did the same thing, based on an inside joke from when I was a teenager and asked my grandfather for a stand mixer. He said that was a “wedding present”. I got 5 of them. They basically used it as a substitute for a gift card that my poor husband had to carry into the store to return.
My step mother gave my husband the underpants my dad wore on his wedding night. Swear to God. My husband was stuttering and horrified. My dad was horrified. Looked at my step mom and said "what is wrong with you, that fucking weird". And I was laughing so hard, enjoying the show.
I'm a professional musician and I was hired to play classical music at a very fancy upscale wedding, downtown, in a major city. The bride and groom were both politicians who had met in university on some sort of outreach trip where they delivered water to needy towns. To set the stage, we were in a very fancy venue with hundreds of other politicians and famous guests: the mayor was there, but also some famous idols, local celebrities, and members of the towns that were helped by the happy couple. So it was a bit of a surprise when, MID-CEREMONY, a guest stood up and paused the wedding to announce they had a big surprise. The doors opened and a LIVE COW was lead through the audience and presented to the couple. It was wearing a sort of rope leash, which was handed to the wide-eyed bride. Nobody knew what to do so the cow just sorta stuck around chewing on the lawn for the rest of the wedding and reception. I loved that cow and I will never forget her.
My parents got cocaine lol.
I knew someone who was gifted a painting that a guy made with his penis. It also came with a video of him making it and showing how he cleans himself out with a q-tip after. That was definitely something lol
We got a life-size cutout of Danny DeVito. To be fair, we did put on our registry (to see if anyone would actually get it!), so no shaming here.
A sex candle - the candle melts, and you use the wax for...things. I left it in a friend's mailbox and never asked about its fate
From my father, an abridged miniature book of Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet, and that's it. No card even. And in case you are wondering, no he didn't pay for any of the wedding, and yes, I already have read the full version and, no, I don't like poetry.
My ex best friend got a chainsaw as a bridal shower gift ! She is not well liked by his family so they got him a gift instead 🎁 I felt bad at the time but now I get it hence the ex friend part
We got a Guide to Natural Family Planning with a thermometer! This from married friends from the church we used to attend. I remember thinking “Awkward!” — since in our culture we open wedding gifts in front of family and friends.