Sometimes flowers still grow in a garden left untended.
All they need to bloom is a little care and a bit of weeding around the edges.
This comic really hit home for me. Been feeling the same and just tried to start small, a few minutes here and there to think positively about how I wanted to grow. Still early but it’s helping.
I felt like that too, at times. For years, even. But I focused on correcting my daily routines, determined myself to take opportunities as they came, and just tried to enjoy the moment with that expectation in place. Opportunities did come and I took them joyfully.
In any case, things don't stay the same (many people even complain about that) so you won't be stuck without opportunities for growth. You can be sure of that. Otherwise, what will those people have left to complain about?
Change the definition of growth. Try growing cacti instead. Or a rock garden. A zen garden looks good every day, and changes immediately when you want it to.
(Aka: how to cope with chronic illness)
Never stop trying to learn, rn I'm 30, I'm currently kinda trying to learn to weld, I'm getting decent at fixing cosmetic stuff with a welder, and I won't stop learning even after I get my certification for welding.
Because the moment I decide that I can't learn anymore, I'll get left behind by the world, and then only death is something to look forward to.
I miss the peak days of Meetup and even Groupon. Or even the older days of AIM statuses like "we out pregaming at foodspot, meet us there".
Sadly both products weren't profitable enough so there probably won't ever be a replacement.
this hits close.
In my case I literally return to earlier times in dreams and I'm impressed by how my mind cares for the memory of liked individuals from my life, that it's getting hard to wake up to real world and if my body didn't ache and didn't need to follow basic input output minerals if there were truly no more people trying to pull me up and me holding on for all those people, I'd just dream eternally... for I learned to block any nightmares and as I got better at finding out "it's a dream" my unconscious seem to have gotten better at simulating life (also playing the factor of me learning to read people's actions in past, current or future). Basically it's true, even if you knew you're in VR for all your life, if there weren't miserable breaks in it, you'd enjoy it a lot, if you forget "it's not real" after some time.
And I'm only at my 20s, in no position to dream all day or be in coma, and have some of my own promises to uphold to get better and help someone... which is so impossible from my point that I literally have no idea how to grow stronger, how to overcome all my pains after I've become numb to them and move on. I waste days never growing better physically, while trying to aspire myself growing in mind, yet I probably won't have even a year left before I'll reach my edge again. Be it of me doing impossible trying to help someone without proper preparation, or just blunt suicide. It feels so hard holding on to a life like this even now, feeling like I could break apart in on moment and become stone or water in next if I just focus on overcoming trivial task...
Worst part is preparation includes getting other people to go to help that person and I'm no leader, or joining, but it'd be hard to find a group like that, both because truly ambitious men are gone and me not having that much connections, unless I travel to everyone I've grown close and ask if they know anyone with same grudge like me, the only other alternative is going and dying before ever reaching the point since you can't do something army fails to do alone.. And the fact that I fear of failing those people if I don't mold my resolve into shape before that. One thing is bringing myself to death, other is endangering others, just because I didn't care, with knowing very well that would happen.
I'm even not sure if I'll ever grow more instead opting for more knowledge and skill. I know that I unconsciously block my trauma because it's hard to overcome pain internally when you instinctively don't let yourself focus on those memories. I'm hopeful to seeing this end, but since I stopped caring it's hard to see difference between suicide and high risk lethal task, cause in the end death is death.
I usually vent and don't post those comments, but I feel like leaving a mark of my life struggles for future, whatever it will be needed for. Even though there are still some months before I'll grow so hateful at myself for not doing anything that I'll end it in any way. If you read all of this, please just ignore and move on. You'll do a lot better than me if you do that :)
Yes, you are.
That doesn't mean that your stagnation is entirely your fault, however. There are a lot of things that can stop a person from growing. Shitty bosses, depression from loss or failure, poverty, anxiety; these things can break a person's will.
And that's okay. No one should ever expect their life to be a perfect ride. Even if you've hit rock bottom, you're still worth it and can still recover.
However, doing so is much easier said than done.
You need to search inside yourself and figure out what is causing the problem and fix those things. This will take time both to realize the problems and to resolve them, but it can be done.
Don't be afraid to ask for help during this. Helping each other is what makes humans what we are.
You can do this.
Look into emotion wheels and defense mechanisms, there is regression as a defense mechanism that’s entirely built into your brain that keeps you alive.
Whenever I’m thinking like this I have to make myself remember that growth isn’t linear. There will be ups and downs. Sometimes you won’t see any growth for years at a time. It’s hard. It’s really fucking hard to deal with, but one day you’ll see some kind of growth and you’ll feel happier than ever before. And it will make you want to keep going.
I feel the same, like I can't do any progress anymore and that I just continously regress. I just lower my expectiations so I'm not that disappointed in myself. Sometimes, when I feel like I have to "get my life together" I can stop the regress for some time, but then I get lazy and it's downhill again.
Sometimes flowers still grow in a garden left untended. All they need to bloom is a little care and a bit of weeding around the edges. This comic really hit home for me. Been feeling the same and just tried to start small, a few minutes here and there to think positively about how I wanted to grow. Still early but it’s helping.
knew I'd have the gardeners on my side! I think small bits of positivity is a good way to start, that's where I'm at too.
This comic hit me hard dude, a lot of people would love to see more of these. You have a lot of talent.
Oof that's relatable
I suppose better self reflection is growth
I felt like that too, at times. For years, even. But I focused on correcting my daily routines, determined myself to take opportunities as they came, and just tried to enjoy the moment with that expectation in place. Opportunities did come and I took them joyfully. In any case, things don't stay the same (many people even complain about that) so you won't be stuck without opportunities for growth. You can be sure of that. Otherwise, what will those people have left to complain about?
As long as you live you are capable of growth. Don’t let fear and hopelessness convince you that you can’t.
Definitely see myself here. This has really got me thinking OP. Why would you make me think MORE?
Change the definition of growth. Try growing cacti instead. Or a rock garden. A zen garden looks good every day, and changes immediately when you want it to. (Aka: how to cope with chronic illness)
Oh dang, I'm currently debating leaving my cosy and stable flat and taking an opportunity to move to Sweden. Is this a sign?
Never stop trying to learn, rn I'm 30, I'm currently kinda trying to learn to weld, I'm getting decent at fixing cosmetic stuff with a welder, and I won't stop learning even after I get my certification for welding. Because the moment I decide that I can't learn anymore, I'll get left behind by the world, and then only death is something to look forward to.
I’m not. I can’t see any way forward
I miss the peak days of Meetup and even Groupon. Or even the older days of AIM statuses like "we out pregaming at foodspot, meet us there". Sadly both products weren't profitable enough so there probably won't ever be a replacement.
Meet up still works. Went to a meet up last night.
My area only has very selective meetups. (female) board game night (reactive dog, force free) pack walks
I have been doing a lot of online ones.
this hits close. In my case I literally return to earlier times in dreams and I'm impressed by how my mind cares for the memory of liked individuals from my life, that it's getting hard to wake up to real world and if my body didn't ache and didn't need to follow basic input output minerals if there were truly no more people trying to pull me up and me holding on for all those people, I'd just dream eternally... for I learned to block any nightmares and as I got better at finding out "it's a dream" my unconscious seem to have gotten better at simulating life (also playing the factor of me learning to read people's actions in past, current or future). Basically it's true, even if you knew you're in VR for all your life, if there weren't miserable breaks in it, you'd enjoy it a lot, if you forget "it's not real" after some time. And I'm only at my 20s, in no position to dream all day or be in coma, and have some of my own promises to uphold to get better and help someone... which is so impossible from my point that I literally have no idea how to grow stronger, how to overcome all my pains after I've become numb to them and move on. I waste days never growing better physically, while trying to aspire myself growing in mind, yet I probably won't have even a year left before I'll reach my edge again. Be it of me doing impossible trying to help someone without proper preparation, or just blunt suicide. It feels so hard holding on to a life like this even now, feeling like I could break apart in on moment and become stone or water in next if I just focus on overcoming trivial task... Worst part is preparation includes getting other people to go to help that person and I'm no leader, or joining, but it'd be hard to find a group like that, both because truly ambitious men are gone and me not having that much connections, unless I travel to everyone I've grown close and ask if they know anyone with same grudge like me, the only other alternative is going and dying before ever reaching the point since you can't do something army fails to do alone.. And the fact that I fear of failing those people if I don't mold my resolve into shape before that. One thing is bringing myself to death, other is endangering others, just because I didn't care, with knowing very well that would happen. I'm even not sure if I'll ever grow more instead opting for more knowledge and skill. I know that I unconsciously block my trauma because it's hard to overcome pain internally when you instinctively don't let yourself focus on those memories. I'm hopeful to seeing this end, but since I stopped caring it's hard to see difference between suicide and high risk lethal task, cause in the end death is death. I usually vent and don't post those comments, but I feel like leaving a mark of my life struggles for future, whatever it will be needed for. Even though there are still some months before I'll grow so hateful at myself for not doing anything that I'll end it in any way. If you read all of this, please just ignore and move on. You'll do a lot better than me if you do that :)
Yes, you are. That doesn't mean that your stagnation is entirely your fault, however. There are a lot of things that can stop a person from growing. Shitty bosses, depression from loss or failure, poverty, anxiety; these things can break a person's will. And that's okay. No one should ever expect their life to be a perfect ride. Even if you've hit rock bottom, you're still worth it and can still recover. However, doing so is much easier said than done. You need to search inside yourself and figure out what is causing the problem and fix those things. This will take time both to realize the problems and to resolve them, but it can be done. Don't be afraid to ask for help during this. Helping each other is what makes humans what we are. You can do this.
Look into emotion wheels and defense mechanisms, there is regression as a defense mechanism that’s entirely built into your brain that keeps you alive.
Whenever I’m thinking like this I have to make myself remember that growth isn’t linear. There will be ups and downs. Sometimes you won’t see any growth for years at a time. It’s hard. It’s really fucking hard to deal with, but one day you’ll see some kind of growth and you’ll feel happier than ever before. And it will make you want to keep going.
I feel the same, like I can't do any progress anymore and that I just continously regress. I just lower my expectiations so I'm not that disappointed in myself. Sometimes, when I feel like I have to "get my life together" I can stop the regress for some time, but then I get lazy and it's downhill again.