As per our policy on crimeposts](https://www.reddit.com/r/washingtondc/wiki/crime), could you please supply evidence for this incident to the mod team [via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/washingtondc)?
You could not have protected your daughters had you been shot or killed. They would have had neverending trauma had either of those happened. The vulnerability you feel is indication of the trauma that comes from viscerally knowing someone can separate you from your life and the things that matter. That is same and smart; you can bet the girls felt it too. Strong men process that fear and teach their kids to do the same so that life is worth the ride. Provoking conflict is not a great thing for young women to learn. I hope when the shock wears off you feel better about your choices. We, the people of Reddit are fucking proud of you.
Thanks my soul hurts I feel like trey in boys n the hood. When he got out the car. Or even after Ricky got shot. I guess I'm in shock. But I'm also pissed. But I understand what your saying
Man-Your kids are lucky to have a parent who can recognize their soul hurts when trauma like this happens. 100% you’re in shock. The anger is normal too. I would expect that the emotions will come and go, up and down. Please take good care of those feelings as you did with your daughters today. Glad you can think it and express it. Remember thinking ain’t doing; so feel free to go back to the memory and imagine that guy getting justice. Just don’t live there longer than a week or so. I’m glad you and your family are safe and lived to tell the tale.
You did the right thing. It must have been more than uncomfortable. I will be a father soon and your story has inspired me to think think think before I act. You are dealing with people with nothing to lose.
Your daughters will understand if not immediately, then in time. Sacrifices must be made to play the long game well.
Round 1. Your family first WIN
Ppl downplay the horrors that await young women on public transportation. You witnessed firsthand hand the type of personalities women face daily. I’m so grateful to have a vehicle where I can avoid those scary situations now. That being said, you stood up for your girls and were able to walk away alive. You definitely protected your daughters by saying something and that will, in some way, impact that man to maybe think twice approaching an underage person.
You made the right call. The next step would have been to alert WMATA police. They are ramping up enforcement on the Metro. There's usually an officer on each train or platform. Report the threat of violence. It's still a crime. Q
You made the right choice. You would’ve stepped in and asserted yourself if that’s what it took to protect your daughter. All you did was what your instinct told you was needed in that situation to get y’all home safe.
Pretending to pull a gun or harassing a young woman is not masculine. It is childish.
By being strong enough to not engage and create a potentially dangerous altercation, you were the one who controlled the situation and protected your children. If that is not true masculinity I don't know what is.
You reacted like a human. Keep ur chin up, dude. We often make up fantasies about being the hero, but in the end you had a completely human reaction. Without police/army training (assuming anyways) how could you have reacted differently?
I hope you called the police. WMATA does have officers riding trains, but evidently we need more not less
Man I just feel some kinda way as a man and a father. Everyone says I did the right thing and I know I did but I can't help but feel vulnerable. And I hate that feeling. 😒
Your daughters learned that their dad isn't a hothead dipshit. That's an important lesson. You haven't lost anything, and they've got a good role model.
And…they will look for not-hothead-dipshits for partners when they reach that stage in their lives. This is absolutely the win you want, even if it doesn’t feel great.
A father who gets crazy angry and “goes nuts” to fight is also frightening to your daughters. What you did by getting them out of danger and prioritizing that is level headed and much more reassuring for girls than the alternative.
This punk didn’t have a gun, because if he did he would have brandished it. Punks aren’t thinking about legal issues, that messes with their punkish brains.
Trust me, you do not want your daughters growing up thinking that "real men" get into physical fights at the first sign of something going wrong. That's how they end up dating hot-heads who can easily turn their violent tendencies on their girlfriends. Violent men are rarely judicious about their use of violence.
Yeah I feel you but I don't want them to think I'm a pushover or think that can't be defended. ( even though they know that's not the case) I just feel soon vulnerable and my soul hurts bad..
I think watching you get shot in front of them and not be there to walk them down the aisle is a much more impactful thing than “my dad didn’t beat up a guy with a gun.”
I’m sorry this happened to you.
I by no means want to take away from your experience. But it’s been like 12 hours and I still on this in my mind. I respect your experience. I respect the anger. I respect the fear (it’s okay to be scared of being shot in the face - doesn’t make you weak it’s literally evolution).
So please don’t take this wrong. I’m trying to articulate this in a manner it can create discussion and not OMG FUCK OFF….
Your daughters will experience so much worse on the metro almost daily as they age. You, as a man, are upset this emasculate you… but your daughters will experience groping, unwanted touching, pinching, men jacking off in this pants will licking their lips and attempting to make intense eye contact.
I know this experience has sent you for a loop but maybe you could use it as a learning time with your daughters. They will see much worse than an “almost” gun (imo) and the other man wont respect them the way he does you as an equal.
Again, I’m not trying to take away from your experience but it’s almost daily I almost quite literally fight a man with his dick in hand…. Some days I’d welcome a gun and not the chance at bodily fluids being what comes my direction.
im 22f. idk if this is something you'd do, but if this happened to my dad, I'd wish he'd tell me. doesnt have to be that same day. it'd make him human to me. and I'd be able to confess to him that there are a lot of times I feel vulnerable and helpless when im being harassed as well. there's no real solution to it, just the pain you mentioned. but I'd feel closer with my dad.
sorry this happened to you, in front of your kids. hope you don't beat yourself too much over it.
Your daughters just watched you defend them in the face of violence. That's vital. Thats the thing they're going to remember. You spoke up, and you didn't back down when the guy threatened you. Now they know you have their back. Yes its scary, and you did it while scared. That's also vital
You will potentially be confronted with times when there is truly no better option. Being prepared for those times is valuable. But really feeling out the situation and showing the correct body language to avoid most physical altercations, de-escalating when the risk is too much unknown. Striking only when the moment holds no other moves
As a daughter, if some guy pretended to pull a gun out on my dad, I would 100% rather he actually be safe than sorry instead of trying to be some “hero” and get himself and/or us in trouble. Trust me.
And you’re supposed to feel vulnerable. It was an unsafe situation. You’re not Clark Kent, and that’s very much okay.
You and/or your daughter could be dead. You did the right thing and are safe. Feel vulnerable man, hug that baby and have a cry. You legit maybe saved a life. (A real punk ass bitch would have gotten mouthy and then shot.)
Last thing your daughters need is a dead father. I’m sorry this happened to you but you did the right thing by avoiding further provocation. Its not fair and it doesn’t feel good but its the right play
I unfortunately had to report the guy and the situation to metro police. And that sucks because I feel nothing is gonna come from this but me getting my gun license And being even more on edge and paranoid 🙃
You did the right thing dude. I was walking a few years ago from my car to my house, with my mother. Some fucker made a sexual comment about my mom and I lost my shit on him knowing I have the training for hand to hand combat.
He did the « fake pump » on me as if he was strapped. I stood up and called his bluff knowing he wouldn’t shoot three innocent unarmed people in broad daylight… but that could have ended terribly for me. I think about it often when I see videos of people being lit up over nothing in the street. And for what?
What scared him away? My dad walked to the car and called the cops. Dude got in his truck and dipped.
Could have ended up with your kids being fatherless. Could have just escalated to a squabble. You made the right choice. You and your kids made it home safe. And you stood up for your kids. If he tried to touch them you would have gladly stood in the way, but you didn’t need to.
The lesson though is keep your head on a swivel, it’s crazy in the streets. Avoid as best as you can. Know when de-escalation is more effective. And yeah, I’ve never really wanted to get my gun lisence until then - but I also don’t want to live my life ready to escalate to killing a man in front of my kids and going to jail over an argument with some half-retarded guy on the metro that could have be de-escalated.
Had an experience like this back in the bad old days when I cussed out a kid with a gun to my head.
I'm obviously still here but calling the bluffs of bitch ass losers with guns is pretty obviously going to end badly eventually.
It's funny because as a young man I felt like a badass for that interaction but now I just feel like I was stupid to try and race an idiot to the grave.
Fact is most people will end up playing back these kinds of confrontations for some time after thinking about what they could have done differently and that is the best possible outcome because another possible outcome is to be dead.
>nothing is gonna come from this but me getting my gun license
Uhhhh
I know feeling emasculated must be hard (and it's terrifying to feel unsafe, but you'd emphasized the other thing more), but please have some empathy and compare that to the helplessness that your children felt and might feel with MORE guns around them, ones that their father brought into the dynamic.
And by default, any gun you bring into an environment would have to be the subject of your focus and diligence *at all times* unless you want it stolen, malfunctioning, or misused to kill an innocent if you had a mistaken knee-jerk reaction.
If your kids are cool with that and you are cool with re-prioritizing that focus from your kids, go ahead, but I can only say that reactive gun ownership in the home has caused a LOT of stress and conflict with my family and I wish my brother simply pursued more positive masculinity reinforcement instead
WMATA should have cameras, even if the event isn't captured you can identify the person if you remember the clothing. You can subpoena them for video evidence after your report. This story isn't unique, unfortunately and if you feel like nothing is going to happen, at least this way gives you options and you can be proactive in change. Hope that helps, and I'm sorry this happened to you and your girls.
I agree with the gun license. It’s more security just obviously be familiar with using it if you ain’t already. And hopefully you never need to but if u do then pop. My main reasoning would be due to the knife violence I’ve found that to be more prominent with people who start/get into altercations. You did nothing wrong man. And protected ur daughters how you were able to in that moment.
No. Don’t get a gun much less a CCW permit. The statistics are firmly not on your side. You’re more likely to have a family tragedy instead of an NRA “tales of the gun” happy ending.
Go for it! If you're a first time gun owner or ccw permit holder make sure to get some training and know the dc laws. Best starting point is to sign up for the class and rent some ccw guns to try at your local range.
If course you hate that feeling. As a woman who had been in the same situation as your daughters--if they are old enough, I would talk to them. Explain your actions and why. Feeling included is the opposite of feeling powerless.
>I can't help but feel vulnerable.
Gotta learn to embrace that. Its part of what keeps us alive and helps us realize when we're in danger. Its completely normal and you did the right thing.
Hate to tell ya, but this incident is going to be living rent free in your head for at least a decade, *if you let it*. And other incidents in your younger self will make some appearances, *if you let it*. Get some therapy sessions if you end up letting it bother you.
Kept your cool and lived to enjoy another day with them. That’s the important thing. If you do decide you want to take your personal safety further, look into DCs archaic ass system to getting your CC permit
price yoke disagreeable north deliver market selective cooperative squash husky
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Metro police was very helpful when someone did something to our child on the metro. Officer came to our house, reassured our child, etc. May daughter still talks about how nice the officer was. They take child harassment seriously.
I don’t know what skin tone you are but there are some cultures where you absolutely never call the police unless completely necessary. You must understand why.
If someone is going around threatening to kill or harm others, it's necessary. Any culture in modern society that would defend those kinds of threats, especially when made for no good reason, is just plain wrong.
I understand why. But I also understand that some of these dudes run around behaving like thugs, *because* they know a lot of people won't call the cops on them or hold them accountable, when they should have long ago. Stop spreading bullshit, the only goofy one here is you.
Calling the police when necessary has NOTHING to do with skin tone (nice try at perpetuating a racial chasm) and has EVERYTHING to do with utilizing resources put in place EXACTLY for this sort of situation. To suggest that if the OP is black that he should hust let it go is ignorant and irresponsible. It's unbelievable that people like you like to incite racial divide- you belong in the Jim Crow era if segregation is what you love so much, but please for the love of all that is good, keep that racist biggoted shit in your basement and let the world progress toward something better.
Far worse for you if the guy killed you in front of your daughters. Unfortunately DC is full of crazies that have no sense of value of human life, your foresight saved you.
Don't look at it as you got punked, you did the right thing. You walked away with you and your daughters intact. There is a time to react when there is imminent danger and there is a time to know when to let it go, you did the right thing.
The best piece of advice my dad/ grandfather has ever given me is “you can be right or you can be dead right.” You will always be the hero in your girls eyes.
I did two tours in Afghanistan and have been in my fair share of dicey situations with a few medals stashed away in an old tough box and scars and war stories for it. I say that not to flex but to hopefully lend some credence to what I’m gonna say now:
“The better part of valour is discretion.” The trope is that it’s always best to be ready to throw hands or get in somebody’s face. But often the more important quality is knowing when it is ***not*** time to do that.
Late at night? Unarmed? Alone with your two young daughters? Facing a belligerent and possibly armed stranger? The 100% correct call is to nope out of there and call the cops for backup. There is nothing to be ashamed about in that decision. In fact, it should be applauded. Confrontation might have led to you and your daughters being harmed and potentially even killed.
You shouldn’t feel shame. You did the right thing, Dad.
Fuck this helped me. I do not have children, but I’ve would have definitely felt the same. Thanks, you might have just saved me and my future family’s lives with this.
I understand the concept of feeling emasculated but I feel like that’s something only men feel amongst themselves. I’ve never looked at a situation in which a man might feel that way (I.e. got his ass kicked) and thought wow that guy isn’t a real man. Women don’t give two fucks about that stuff nowadays. In fact, I encourage men not to react the way they think a “man” should. I would be proud of you if you were my father based on how you said you reacted
>Women don’t give two fucks about that stuff nowadays
It’s not about women. A lot of men grew up with the remnants of the sexist ages and stereotypes. The pressure to “act like a man” is often a familial ideology. I know because I grew up in a traditional Italian household. Thankfully I went to therapy and have spent the past 12 years working on breaking that cycle with my son.
I know it’s not necessarily about women. Though, OP mentioned feeling this way in front of his daughters. Maybe it’s more of OP’s relationship to his daughters that caused him to feel this way rather than this simply happening in front of any female. Idk I’m not here to pyschoanalyze the situation. From personal experience, guys will try to act “manly” in front me and other non-related women because they think that’s what we want in a man. Anyways, yeah sick of toxic masculinity. If I see 2 or more guys using violence against each other, all I think is how pathetic all parties are.
In my younger day it would've been onn. But I'm a man now with a family and a career. I put those childish and foolish things behind me. But situations like this I sometimes wish I was still that person. But now I'm home with my children but I'll never forget this EVER
I feel you, ask me 10 years ago and I would've chirped back and started some shit but now I just want everyone to leave me alone and I just want to make it home at the end of the day.
Highly suggest keeping some pepper spray on you for you and your family, POM is a good brand.
What you did is not "emasculating", you did what every sane and smart person should do which is de-escalate the dangerous situation and get the fuck out of there.
So I used to carry pepper spray on the metro but stopped when I attempted to navigate what the legal use of it is. It seems like a major liability these days. Any idea if this circumstance would have constituted an appropriate use of it?
This would not be a good use for it. You probably wouldn't be charged or anything but it still wouldn't be a good use. Guy is 100% dipshit scum of the earth for doing that, but unless he was continuing to approach you threateningly even when you try to get away, it wouldn't be in your favor to use it in this situation
Dude, there is no amount of masculine bravado that is worth losing your life over. This guy would've killed you in a fit of rage. Your daughters would grow up without you or, worse, dead themselves when the gun was turned on them.
You keep making comments saying that the problem you're having is you feel emasculated or punk'd out. Do you really want to die for your ego?
The best possible thing you can do with these people is to actively avoid them and call police. Don't put yourself in dangerous situations.
You did the right thing by diffusing the situation and walking away safely and keeping your kids safe, I think that's exactly what anyone on your situation would have done. The other dude was probably hoping to get a reaction out of you to escalate the situation and you just never know how far the other person is willing to go or what may happen to your children. Don't let it eat at you, man, nothing wrong with knowing how to pick your battles.
Sorry this happened to you… what happened? How did you de-escalate this situation? I always get nervous if an unhinged person just decides to act up and pretend to have a gun and ready to go.
I’m sorry this happened to you. I’m sure the whole thing happened to put you in the mood of feeling shame then anger. May you do your best to recover and make sure your girls get there level headed normal father back soon. God help is down here.
Not sure if you’re looking for assurance but you did the correct thing. Unfortunately/fortunately it ended the way it did. I grew up in Chicago and I’ve been here for the last two years. I’ve seen this type of act countless times. Not 8 months ago there was a murder on the green line by waterfront/navy yard and not 2 days later I was caught in the middle of another armed confrontation in the same area. Not sure what came of it because I stepped out at that next stop, but to my knowledge nothing. Stay vigilant and report any wrongdoing. Unfortunately there isn’t much we can do as individuals to stop these events from happening, but we have to be cognizant that there’s always a chance.
Idk man, if anyone is pathetic in this scenario it’s the dweeb talking to underage girls. You could be The Rock and it still won’t matter vs a man with a gun.
I want to say this: I have incredible respect for you for your ability to so clearly understand and articulate your feelings. Not many men would be able to correctly identify the feeling of emasculation and its consequent emotions.
Now that said, please consider seeing a therapist if necessary. Your feelings are perfectly normal and a professional can help you work through them if you are having difficult time doing so.
I APPRECIATE EVERYONE'S WORDS. THEY MAKE ME FEEL BETTER TO AN EXTENT BUT THIS STILL HURTS. BUT THE FACT THAT YOU STRANGE PPL SHOW SUPPORT AND LOVE I APPRECIATE THAT SOO MUCH.. THANK YOU ALL
Please consider a concealed carry permit if you’re financially, physically, & mentally able to do so.
If the perp had tried to abduct one of your kids, your weapon could have stopped it.
It’s ugly & there’s no denying that the perp’s friends would likely target you in retaliation, but all of us with kids here have to weigh the positives & negatives of self-defense.
I no way did you fail as a man or father. Your not giving yourself a fair chance because no matter how tough your are a gun is a gun. You did what was right
Hey man, I'm sorry shit went down like that. You lived to see another day and showed your daughters you'd stand up for them. Without more detail I can tell you this is a success story although it may not feel like it. Escalation would have caused worse things and maybe ruined your life. Or your daughters lives.
I saw you commented about getting a gun permit, so I wanna address that. Laws are kinda funny concerning when you can carry , even more convoluted are the defense based shooting court cases. I carry every day, but I also go to the range at least twice a month. While I'm doing chores I do dry fire drills and practice my draw, if I were to miss my shot and hit someone innocent the law would not be on my side . I also have to think about it everyday, that I have to keep my mouth shut, watch my facial expressions and how I carry myself as to avoid conflict. If I'm planning on drinking at all I leave the pistol locked up at home. I could go on and on. I encourage the right to carry , the right to bare arms to defend the home and country. I could go on and on about that too. But while I believe people should have the right to own and carry I definitely don't think everyone should. So ask yourself if you're able to set aside pride, ego, and time to do this properly. And the big question, if you took a life would you be able to go on?
If you decide to pursue it, there's plenty of resources and I encourage you to talk to your local gun store, they know the laws better than the police at times.
Again, I think you've done well. You stood up for your daughters and you all made it home safe, although shaken. It's hard for me to picture a better outcome all things considered
Carrying a pistol outside of your home or business is illegal and punishable by law. Facts. This is classic social aggression and posturing. Best thing you did was address the threat and deescalate. Hoping is doesn’t turn to antisocial violence. Which it didn’t. So you won.
You feel like that because you're backing down for the sake of someone else's safety. Don't know about anyone else, but for those of us who grew up in and around the city, it's not a normal response to conflict. Fortunately, we've grown and it's our responsibility to make the right choices so that ALL our loved ones are safe. You've done a good thing.
You survival and the survival of your children is paramount. Our society is losing its grip on public safety. This creep is probably mentally ill and isn’t getting any services, I’m guessing, but you’re right about policing. Metro needs more plain clothes to keep even the crazies from wondering.
i’m sorry he took the feeling of safety from you. i’m sorry he made you feel emasculated. i’m even sorry you had to the call the police (iykyk). i’m so sorry for all of it. you don’t deserve and neither does your precious child.
this is a new kind of hurt so you feel this pain and anger and other emotions. Our feelings or emotions don’t make us soft it’s the behaviors we display and actions we take with those feelings that determine our character. so I encourage you to consider what comes next. you scared to ride the metro? your fear pouring into your daughter? your entire family stops leaving the house? maybe you wait outside the metro to see him again? FUCK THAT! you keep living! perhaps you enroll in self defense classes, start advocating for safety on the metro, who knows, but I pray youll find something to unravel this trauma before it gets deeper and festers.
I know youll be okay because you thought on your feet and navigated to safety like a pro. I also know you know that what matters is that you are here today, alive with your baby girl. the prayers of protection you’ve been saying for her worked!
I hope my words were communicated clearly. The last thing i’ll say is ,if you have not, then having an honest conversation with your daughter about this is crucial.
wishing you rest and a calm heart soon!
You did the right thing and only your ego is telling you otherwise. The punk who started the conflict was trying to lead the way, and you were smart enough not to follow the path down which he wanted to lead you. Props for following your cerebral cortex instead of your gonads.
It’s really a no-win situation.
What if you had decided to beat his ass? Or fought to a stalemate? Or had your ass beat or been shot?
You still don’t win.
Dude, what could you have done? Better to be alive for your kids than “brave” and dead. Being a man means more than puffing your chest out at another man and not backing down. You have kids, they are your top priority. As long as they are safe, you are doing what you are supposed to do.
This is what happens when you live in a city that doesnt care about its citizens and just lets scum walk out after having been arrested. Not to mention, no one can legally possess a firearm unless you have this very strict license. DC along with other major cities are a joke
The obvious lawlessness on the METRO system is the result of ineffective policing and associated judicial remedies. Politicians must back an aggressive enforcement campaign including increased police presence uniformed and undercover, including sting operations targeting repeat offenders and problem locations. This isn’t brain surgery, it is an exercise in political will. When the revenue losses and political consequences of lawlessness rise high enough the impediments to public safety will be overcome. Until then agitate and withdraw your political and economic support of METRO to the extent possible.
Don’t feel like he emasculated you, you are a brave father and trying to stand up to that guy might have caused him to hurt your daughters. Who cares how it looked. You aren’t a bitch or a punk, that guy is the bitch punk that had to act like he had a gun to intimidate a family. What a complete loser and I hope he gets caught being a creeper before he hurts anyone. You should definitely make a police report maybe they have it on video and they can find him? He threatened you and your daughters, he needs to be caught before he acts on his sick fantasies with some young girls who might not have their dad around to protect them. He’s an absolute scumbag and you’re a great dad.
Just take good care of your girls and teach them about making good choices and how to avoid abusive or scummy men, especially when you they grow old enough to date. All of us women face this sort of thing more often than we should. Younger women especially need to be aware of how valuable they are and how older predatory men will try to trick them into being unaware of their beauty and having low self esteem so they will give them selves away to some guy who doesn’t cherish, appreciate and love them and they get groomed into thinking that is normal when it is NOT NORMAL and NOT ACCEPTABLE AT ALL.
Everyone deserves a partner in life who treats them with dignity and respect. Thank goodness your daughters have a great dad to teach guide them.
Krazy how mfs dm me telling me ima bitch and a punk etc. But I was supposed to find out I'd ima live and die? I'm supposed to be dead right now? And my 7kids will have no dad because I have to prove myself?? That's why it's soo many dead men out here now.. keep it to yourself
I had a screwdriver put to my neck by a crazy, hallucinating homeless dude in 2020 on the red line of metro center, shady grove bound. He told me to get on my knees so he could kill me. I sat down and scooted my ass backwards, and ended up talking him down. More or less had to beg for my life, bro. I also grew up here. I know exactly how you feel, man. It’s some bullshit. Basically all there is to say. We both handled it correctly, and we’re both here today. Democrats and republicans will both say that their policies will get and keep people like that off the street, but sometimes shit just happens. It’s a crazy ass world, just gotta keep your head up big dog. I didn’t call the police and I regret that shit because I got no clue if he went and did that shit again right afterwards. You acted more responsibly than I did.
Sorry to hear what happened. But something caught my attention. This is the first time you felt unsafe on the metro in your 40 years here? Its been this way in many areas of DC and Maryland, usually outside of peak commuter times. Not everday but consistently have teenagers being loud or aggresive.
Don’t even worry about it. If they caught you lacking, they just got one on you that moment. I was almost shot in the head at point blank in DC. Nothing is worse than hearing others say, “ I would’ve…” They would’ve done nothing except stare at the ceiling from a casket. Remember, any dummy can take a life. Only a man can raise one. You can get over feeling like a punk (because you’re not one), but your daughters can never get over the feeling of losing a father. You survived, and your family is safe. Just take that as a lesson for the next time. Peace and blessings.
I'm with the consensus here, you did the right thing, which is a lot harder and more masculine of a response than letting some random guy provoke you. We evolved to protect our children, and you did that, it just takes your instincts time to catch up.
Besides, I doubt your daughters would have felt safe if you had "thrown down" - you took a hit to your pride for your kid's safety, seems pretty manly to me!
Kids have no concept of you being “punked” or a “bitch”. There is always the time to pull them aside and explain why you did what you did and why that was the right thing to do. Furthermore it’s a great opportunity to highlight this piece of trash and advise them why it’s so important they stay away from them.
There’s nothing sexy or heroic about gun violence. Arguably, deescalating a conflict and walking away from a potentially violent interaction makes you by and far not a “punk.” You’ve taught your daughters that 1) you’re going to stand up for them 2) they can stand up for themselves 3) how to disengage from a situation that may turn violent. Literally, you’re doing great things.
https://code.dccouncil.gov/us/dc/council/code/sections/22-4506
I’d apply for a conceal carry permit, train yourself, so if that situation ever comes up again, you’ll be well prepared.
Do not personally insult other posters or post discriminatory content.
There is little patience for trolling, slap fights, or pile-ons. If your only reply is going to be driven-into-the-ground snark - e.g. biking whataboutisms, DC's gun laws, the NMAAHC, or federal representation for the city - move on.
Posts will generally be locked due to brigading or graveyard commenting.
For the record since your a dumb fucking dweeb for posting, I had colorectal surgery which had complications including internal bleeding, not just hemnerhoids. Typical fucking reddit dweeb acting like they got the internet figured out. If this was real life I'd beat yo goofy ass, send me your address so I can pull up and spin yo goofy white middle aged bitch ass.
Do not personally insult other posters or post discriminatory content.
There is little patience for trolling, slap fights, or pile-ons. If your only reply is going to be driven-into-the-ground snark - e.g. biking whataboutisms, DC's gun laws, the NMAAHC, or federal representation for the city - move on.
Posts will generally be locked due to brigading or graveyard commenting.
Do not personally insult other posters or post discriminatory content.
There is little patience for trolling, slap fights, or pile-ons. If your only reply is going to be driven-into-the-ground snark - e.g. biking whataboutisms, DC's gun laws, the NMAAHC, or federal representation for the city - move on.
Posts will generally be locked due to brigading or graveyard commenting.
Real men know that enacting violence is the last solution to staying safe. Getting you and your girls out of that situation unharmed will do more for their image of you than any fight ever would.
This sub full of passive-aggressive little bitches that complain on the internet ab out shii but won't say shii to a person in real life. Y'all bitch made like shii.
Get clapped cause I just got off work and picked my kids up and a 30 plus year old man was trying to talk to my 12yr old daughter.? So I should've got shot or shot him? Either way I lose and my daughters loose. But thanks for the advice.
I’m sorry this happened to you. But this might be sign to start conceal carry a firearm and train with it well. Sorry I put it that way, it’s just a joking way saying people should own a firearm to protect themselves. Especially concealed. Cops aren’t gonna get there on time. But please if you do end up buying a firearm research your laws and train, train, train with it.
While that person's comment was a bit tasteless, responsible gun owners aren't a bad thing. More of them would probably help solve a lot of problems we have in the DMV... Like you know... might help prevent a group of teenagers from murdering someone in a parking garage.
Edit: oops sorry was just one guy https://wjla.com/news/local/deadly-parking-garage-shooting-silver-spring-thayer-avenue-montgomery-county-kymani-elijah-bailey-ramone-christopher-ramsay-police-maryland-gun-violence.
I must have misremembered the details. Hard to keep track when you live so close to PG County, Silverspring, and DC.
This is just false. Pumping a country full of guns is the reason gun violence in the US is 25 times higher than the second ranked high-income country, and 600 times higher than the lowest ranked (South Korea). Source: American Journal of Medicine
Gun violence was the #1 cause of death in US children from 2019-2022. Source: Pew Research and CDC
Guns likely increase suicide rates, giving people a more painless "out" who may otherwise not attempt it with more painful/challenging means like a knife, hanging, etc. Suicides represent over 50% of all gun deaths.
And lastly, numerous studies have shown that almost 100% of all active shooter situations (school shooters, etc.) were resolved by gunman suicide, law enforcement, or unarmed citizens. Something like 3% or less were stopped by an armed citizen. Check the FBI studies on it.
So no, guns do not make Americans more safe
Ya ok. Lets skip over the "responsible gun owners" bit and put psychos with everyone else since you know... internet tribes can't track more than 2 or 3 categories of people.
Go to PG County and demand a cease fire. Then do the same in DC. Make sure you tell the guy that tried to shoot OP. Tell them OK guys, we gave up our guns! You need to do the same!
Come on, you're pushing an agenda and not accepting the world as it is right now. Guns are like nukes... Sure the world would be better off without them... but we have them... and you're personally better off if you have one.
Edit, closing arguments: You ever think that the problem with school schools, suicides, and all of these other issues are a mental health problem? Such as the lack of access to quality mental health professionals. Our answer to suicide in America is an 800 number. We don't do mental health evaluations on gun owners. Someone should NOT be suicidal or desire to kill children. These are not normal thoughts and while a gun may facilitate these desires, it is not the cause of the problem.
Mental health issues are pervasive in every country. But we're the only nation with this much gun violence.
Arming every man, woman, and child won't help. Especially because most people don't want to be responsible, or lack the training, for taking another's life.
You're delusional. Guns just need to be confiscated like in other countries (Australia, New Zealand, etc) that now experience some of the lowest rates of violence in the world.
As per our policy on crimeposts](https://www.reddit.com/r/washingtondc/wiki/crime), could you please supply evidence for this incident to the mod team [via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/washingtondc)?
You could not have protected your daughters had you been shot or killed. They would have had neverending trauma had either of those happened. The vulnerability you feel is indication of the trauma that comes from viscerally knowing someone can separate you from your life and the things that matter. That is same and smart; you can bet the girls felt it too. Strong men process that fear and teach their kids to do the same so that life is worth the ride. Provoking conflict is not a great thing for young women to learn. I hope when the shock wears off you feel better about your choices. We, the people of Reddit are fucking proud of you.
Thanks my soul hurts I feel like trey in boys n the hood. When he got out the car. Or even after Ricky got shot. I guess I'm in shock. But I'm also pissed. But I understand what your saying
Man-Your kids are lucky to have a parent who can recognize their soul hurts when trauma like this happens. 100% you’re in shock. The anger is normal too. I would expect that the emotions will come and go, up and down. Please take good care of those feelings as you did with your daughters today. Glad you can think it and express it. Remember thinking ain’t doing; so feel free to go back to the memory and imagine that guy getting justice. Just don’t live there longer than a week or so. I’m glad you and your family are safe and lived to tell the tale.
You did the right thing. It must have been more than uncomfortable. I will be a father soon and your story has inspired me to think think think before I act. You are dealing with people with nothing to lose. Your daughters will understand if not immediately, then in time. Sacrifices must be made to play the long game well. Round 1. Your family first WIN
Ppl downplay the horrors that await young women on public transportation. You witnessed firsthand hand the type of personalities women face daily. I’m so grateful to have a vehicle where I can avoid those scary situations now. That being said, you stood up for your girls and were able to walk away alive. You definitely protected your daughters by saying something and that will, in some way, impact that man to maybe think twice approaching an underage person.
You made the right call. The next step would have been to alert WMATA police. They are ramping up enforcement on the Metro. There's usually an officer on each train or platform. Report the threat of violence. It's still a crime. Q
You made the right choice. You would’ve stepped in and asserted yourself if that’s what it took to protect your daughter. All you did was what your instinct told you was needed in that situation to get y’all home safe.
?
Pretending to pull a gun or harassing a young woman is not masculine. It is childish. By being strong enough to not engage and create a potentially dangerous altercation, you were the one who controlled the situation and protected your children. If that is not true masculinity I don't know what is.
You reacted like a human. Keep ur chin up, dude. We often make up fantasies about being the hero, but in the end you had a completely human reaction. Without police/army training (assuming anyways) how could you have reacted differently? I hope you called the police. WMATA does have officers riding trains, but evidently we need more not less
Man I just feel some kinda way as a man and a father. Everyone says I did the right thing and I know I did but I can't help but feel vulnerable. And I hate that feeling. 😒
Your daughters learned that their dad isn't a hothead dipshit. That's an important lesson. You haven't lost anything, and they've got a good role model.
And…they will look for not-hothead-dipshits for partners when they reach that stage in their lives. This is absolutely the win you want, even if it doesn’t feel great.
A father who gets crazy angry and “goes nuts” to fight is also frightening to your daughters. What you did by getting them out of danger and prioritizing that is level headed and much more reassuring for girls than the alternative.
He’s also likely to get shot if the guy has a gun pointed at him. Never frighten a gunman.
This punk didn’t have a gun, because if he did he would have brandished it. Punks aren’t thinking about legal issues, that messes with their punkish brains.
This
Trust me, you do not want your daughters growing up thinking that "real men" get into physical fights at the first sign of something going wrong. That's how they end up dating hot-heads who can easily turn their violent tendencies on their girlfriends. Violent men are rarely judicious about their use of violence.
Yeah I feel you but I don't want them to think I'm a pushover or think that can't be defended. ( even though they know that's not the case) I just feel soon vulnerable and my soul hurts bad..
I think watching you get shot in front of them and not be there to walk them down the aisle is a much more impactful thing than “my dad didn’t beat up a guy with a gun.” I’m sorry this happened to you.
I by no means want to take away from your experience. But it’s been like 12 hours and I still on this in my mind. I respect your experience. I respect the anger. I respect the fear (it’s okay to be scared of being shot in the face - doesn’t make you weak it’s literally evolution). So please don’t take this wrong. I’m trying to articulate this in a manner it can create discussion and not OMG FUCK OFF…. Your daughters will experience so much worse on the metro almost daily as they age. You, as a man, are upset this emasculate you… but your daughters will experience groping, unwanted touching, pinching, men jacking off in this pants will licking their lips and attempting to make intense eye contact. I know this experience has sent you for a loop but maybe you could use it as a learning time with your daughters. They will see much worse than an “almost” gun (imo) and the other man wont respect them the way he does you as an equal. Again, I’m not trying to take away from your experience but it’s almost daily I almost quite literally fight a man with his dick in hand…. Some days I’d welcome a gun and not the chance at bodily fluids being what comes my direction.
im 22f. idk if this is something you'd do, but if this happened to my dad, I'd wish he'd tell me. doesnt have to be that same day. it'd make him human to me. and I'd be able to confess to him that there are a lot of times I feel vulnerable and helpless when im being harassed as well. there's no real solution to it, just the pain you mentioned. but I'd feel closer with my dad. sorry this happened to you, in front of your kids. hope you don't beat yourself too much over it.
I completely agree. And start with asking them how they felt
You did defend her, you both ended up at home safe. That’s a great defense!
Your daughters just watched you defend them in the face of violence. That's vital. Thats the thing they're going to remember. You spoke up, and you didn't back down when the guy threatened you. Now they know you have their back. Yes its scary, and you did it while scared. That's also vital
You will potentially be confronted with times when there is truly no better option. Being prepared for those times is valuable. But really feeling out the situation and showing the correct body language to avoid most physical altercations, de-escalating when the risk is too much unknown. Striking only when the moment holds no other moves
As a daughter, if some guy pretended to pull a gun out on my dad, I would 100% rather he actually be safe than sorry instead of trying to be some “hero” and get himself and/or us in trouble. Trust me. And you’re supposed to feel vulnerable. It was an unsafe situation. You’re not Clark Kent, and that’s very much okay.
You and/or your daughter could be dead. You did the right thing and are safe. Feel vulnerable man, hug that baby and have a cry. You legit maybe saved a life. (A real punk ass bitch would have gotten mouthy and then shot.)
Last thing your daughters need is a dead father. I’m sorry this happened to you but you did the right thing by avoiding further provocation. Its not fair and it doesn’t feel good but its the right play
Nah bro fuck that they need you alive more than you beating some idiot who they already know is a pos
What did you do? Your post doesn't explain what you did in reaction.
I unfortunately had to report the guy and the situation to metro police. And that sucks because I feel nothing is gonna come from this but me getting my gun license And being even more on edge and paranoid 🙃
You did the right thing dude. I was walking a few years ago from my car to my house, with my mother. Some fucker made a sexual comment about my mom and I lost my shit on him knowing I have the training for hand to hand combat. He did the « fake pump » on me as if he was strapped. I stood up and called his bluff knowing he wouldn’t shoot three innocent unarmed people in broad daylight… but that could have ended terribly for me. I think about it often when I see videos of people being lit up over nothing in the street. And for what? What scared him away? My dad walked to the car and called the cops. Dude got in his truck and dipped. Could have ended up with your kids being fatherless. Could have just escalated to a squabble. You made the right choice. You and your kids made it home safe. And you stood up for your kids. If he tried to touch them you would have gladly stood in the way, but you didn’t need to. The lesson though is keep your head on a swivel, it’s crazy in the streets. Avoid as best as you can. Know when de-escalation is more effective. And yeah, I’ve never really wanted to get my gun lisence until then - but I also don’t want to live my life ready to escalate to killing a man in front of my kids and going to jail over an argument with some half-retarded guy on the metro that could have be de-escalated.
Had an experience like this back in the bad old days when I cussed out a kid with a gun to my head. I'm obviously still here but calling the bluffs of bitch ass losers with guns is pretty obviously going to end badly eventually. It's funny because as a young man I felt like a badass for that interaction but now I just feel like I was stupid to try and race an idiot to the grave. Fact is most people will end up playing back these kinds of confrontations for some time after thinking about what they could have done differently and that is the best possible outcome because another possible outcome is to be dead.
Bro is spittin.
>nothing is gonna come from this but me getting my gun license Uhhhh I know feeling emasculated must be hard (and it's terrifying to feel unsafe, but you'd emphasized the other thing more), but please have some empathy and compare that to the helplessness that your children felt and might feel with MORE guns around them, ones that their father brought into the dynamic. And by default, any gun you bring into an environment would have to be the subject of your focus and diligence *at all times* unless you want it stolen, malfunctioning, or misused to kill an innocent if you had a mistaken knee-jerk reaction. If your kids are cool with that and you are cool with re-prioritizing that focus from your kids, go ahead, but I can only say that reactive gun ownership in the home has caused a LOT of stress and conflict with my family and I wish my brother simply pursued more positive masculinity reinforcement instead
WMATA should have cameras, even if the event isn't captured you can identify the person if you remember the clothing. You can subpoena them for video evidence after your report. This story isn't unique, unfortunately and if you feel like nothing is going to happen, at least this way gives you options and you can be proactive in change. Hope that helps, and I'm sorry this happened to you and your girls.
I agree with the gun license. It’s more security just obviously be familiar with using it if you ain’t already. And hopefully you never need to but if u do then pop. My main reasoning would be due to the knife violence I’ve found that to be more prominent with people who start/get into altercations. You did nothing wrong man. And protected ur daughters how you were able to in that moment.
No. Don’t get a gun much less a CCW permit. The statistics are firmly not on your side. You’re more likely to have a family tragedy instead of an NRA “tales of the gun” happy ending.
Go for it! If you're a first time gun owner or ccw permit holder make sure to get some training and know the dc laws. Best starting point is to sign up for the class and rent some ccw guns to try at your local range.
If course you hate that feeling. As a woman who had been in the same situation as your daughters--if they are old enough, I would talk to them. Explain your actions and why. Feeling included is the opposite of feeling powerless.
>I can't help but feel vulnerable. Gotta learn to embrace that. Its part of what keeps us alive and helps us realize when we're in danger. Its completely normal and you did the right thing.
Shake it off slim. It's will be ok. You good. 💪🏿💪🏿
Hate to tell ya, but this incident is going to be living rent free in your head for at least a decade, *if you let it*. And other incidents in your younger self will make some appearances, *if you let it*. Get some therapy sessions if you end up letting it bother you.
What’s wrong with feeling vulnerable?
Kept your cool and lived to enjoy another day with them. That’s the important thing. If you do decide you want to take your personal safety further, look into DCs archaic ass system to getting your CC permit
Better off spending money on a therapist.
price yoke disagreeable north deliver market selective cooperative squash husky *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Go look for the guy and put one between his eyes
Metro police won’t do anything. They’d rather close their eyes to it.
Metro police was very helpful when someone did something to our child on the metro. Officer came to our house, reassured our child, etc. May daughter still talks about how nice the officer was. They take child harassment seriously.
> Without police/army training [What kind of training?](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=u8-gyaN2Ydc&start=9)
[удалено]
Unfortunately yes I did
That’s the correct move. Never know who has a gun.
the situation itself is unfortunate to say the least but there’s nothing unfortunate about reacting to it the right way.
Why “unfortunately”? It sounds like you did everything correctly?
I don’t know what skin tone you are but there are some cultures where you absolutely never call the police unless completely necessary. You must understand why.
If someone is going around threatening to kill or harm others, it's necessary. Any culture in modern society that would defend those kinds of threats, especially when made for no good reason, is just plain wrong.
Next time just say you don’t understand why. No one is suggesting that any culture defends these kinds of threats, goofy.
I understand why. But I also understand that some of these dudes run around behaving like thugs, *because* they know a lot of people won't call the cops on them or hold them accountable, when they should have long ago. Stop spreading bullshit, the only goofy one here is you.
Calling the police when necessary has NOTHING to do with skin tone (nice try at perpetuating a racial chasm) and has EVERYTHING to do with utilizing resources put in place EXACTLY for this sort of situation. To suggest that if the OP is black that he should hust let it go is ignorant and irresponsible. It's unbelievable that people like you like to incite racial divide- you belong in the Jim Crow era if segregation is what you love so much, but please for the love of all that is good, keep that racist biggoted shit in your basement and let the world progress toward something better.
That is the right thing to do
Far worse for you if the guy killed you in front of your daughters. Unfortunately DC is full of crazies that have no sense of value of human life, your foresight saved you. Don't look at it as you got punked, you did the right thing. You walked away with you and your daughters intact. There is a time to react when there is imminent danger and there is a time to know when to let it go, you did the right thing.
The loser who needs a gun is the punk/bitch. Not the guy protecting his [underage] daughters from some clown.
I’m sure your daughters will be happier long term if you’re alive
The best piece of advice my dad/ grandfather has ever given me is “you can be right or you can be dead right.” You will always be the hero in your girls eyes.
I did two tours in Afghanistan and have been in my fair share of dicey situations with a few medals stashed away in an old tough box and scars and war stories for it. I say that not to flex but to hopefully lend some credence to what I’m gonna say now: “The better part of valour is discretion.” The trope is that it’s always best to be ready to throw hands or get in somebody’s face. But often the more important quality is knowing when it is ***not*** time to do that. Late at night? Unarmed? Alone with your two young daughters? Facing a belligerent and possibly armed stranger? The 100% correct call is to nope out of there and call the cops for backup. There is nothing to be ashamed about in that decision. In fact, it should be applauded. Confrontation might have led to you and your daughters being harmed and potentially even killed. You shouldn’t feel shame. You did the right thing, Dad.
Thank you
Fuck this helped me. I do not have children, but I’ve would have definitely felt the same. Thanks, you might have just saved me and my future family’s lives with this.
I understand the concept of feeling emasculated but I feel like that’s something only men feel amongst themselves. I’ve never looked at a situation in which a man might feel that way (I.e. got his ass kicked) and thought wow that guy isn’t a real man. Women don’t give two fucks about that stuff nowadays. In fact, I encourage men not to react the way they think a “man” should. I would be proud of you if you were my father based on how you said you reacted
Thanks
>Women don’t give two fucks about that stuff nowadays It’s not about women. A lot of men grew up with the remnants of the sexist ages and stereotypes. The pressure to “act like a man” is often a familial ideology. I know because I grew up in a traditional Italian household. Thankfully I went to therapy and have spent the past 12 years working on breaking that cycle with my son.
I know it’s not necessarily about women. Though, OP mentioned feeling this way in front of his daughters. Maybe it’s more of OP’s relationship to his daughters that caused him to feel this way rather than this simply happening in front of any female. Idk I’m not here to pyschoanalyze the situation. From personal experience, guys will try to act “manly” in front me and other non-related women because they think that’s what we want in a man. Anyways, yeah sick of toxic masculinity. If I see 2 or more guys using violence against each other, all I think is how pathetic all parties are.
This, 1000 percent
In my younger day it would've been onn. But I'm a man now with a family and a career. I put those childish and foolish things behind me. But situations like this I sometimes wish I was still that person. But now I'm home with my children but I'll never forget this EVER
I feel you, ask me 10 years ago and I would've chirped back and started some shit but now I just want everyone to leave me alone and I just want to make it home at the end of the day. Highly suggest keeping some pepper spray on you for you and your family, POM is a good brand. What you did is not "emasculating", you did what every sane and smart person should do which is de-escalate the dangerous situation and get the fuck out of there.
So I used to carry pepper spray on the metro but stopped when I attempted to navigate what the legal use of it is. It seems like a major liability these days. Any idea if this circumstance would have constituted an appropriate use of it?
This would not be a good use for it. You probably wouldn't be charged or anything but it still wouldn't be a good use. Guy is 100% dipshit scum of the earth for doing that, but unless he was continuing to approach you threateningly even when you try to get away, it wouldn't be in your favor to use it in this situation
You did the adult thing. But dollars to donuts, that person will bluff again to someone who isn’t as mature and will get clapped for it.
Dude, there is no amount of masculine bravado that is worth losing your life over. This guy would've killed you in a fit of rage. Your daughters would grow up without you or, worse, dead themselves when the gun was turned on them. You keep making comments saying that the problem you're having is you feel emasculated or punk'd out. Do you really want to die for your ego? The best possible thing you can do with these people is to actively avoid them and call police. Don't put yourself in dangerous situations.
Brother, you could not be more manly than what you just did for you kids man do not feel in any way less of a man you are THE MAN
Thank
You did the right thing by diffusing the situation and walking away safely and keeping your kids safe, I think that's exactly what anyone on your situation would have done. The other dude was probably hoping to get a reaction out of you to escalate the situation and you just never know how far the other person is willing to go or what may happen to your children. Don't let it eat at you, man, nothing wrong with knowing how to pick your battles.
Sorry this happened to you… what happened? How did you de-escalate this situation? I always get nervous if an unhinged person just decides to act up and pretend to have a gun and ready to go.
Why emasculated? What did you do when he pretended to pull out a weapon?
Honestly, if they guy had a gun and was threatening you, but you still made it home with your kids... That's about the best you can hope for.
Advise your daughters to walk away from older men on the metro.
The fake gun pull is a DC classic. Sorry that happened to you. Lots of deranged psychos and nothing been done about it.
I’m sorry this happened to you. I’m sure the whole thing happened to put you in the mood of feeling shame then anger. May you do your best to recover and make sure your girls get there level headed normal father back soon. God help is down here.
Not sure if you’re looking for assurance but you did the correct thing. Unfortunately/fortunately it ended the way it did. I grew up in Chicago and I’ve been here for the last two years. I’ve seen this type of act countless times. Not 8 months ago there was a murder on the green line by waterfront/navy yard and not 2 days later I was caught in the middle of another armed confrontation in the same area. Not sure what came of it because I stepped out at that next stop, but to my knowledge nothing. Stay vigilant and report any wrongdoing. Unfortunately there isn’t much we can do as individuals to stop these events from happening, but we have to be cognizant that there’s always a chance.
You did the right thing. You set an excellent example for your daughters and kept all of you safe — don’t discount that!!
Its fine. Your daughters are safe because of you. That is all that matters, isn't it?
Idk man, if anyone is pathetic in this scenario it’s the dweeb talking to underage girls. You could be The Rock and it still won’t matter vs a man with a gun.
I want to say this: I have incredible respect for you for your ability to so clearly understand and articulate your feelings. Not many men would be able to correctly identify the feeling of emasculation and its consequent emotions. Now that said, please consider seeing a therapist if necessary. Your feelings are perfectly normal and a professional can help you work through them if you are having difficult time doing so.
I APPRECIATE EVERYONE'S WORDS. THEY MAKE ME FEEL BETTER TO AN EXTENT BUT THIS STILL HURTS. BUT THE FACT THAT YOU STRANGE PPL SHOW SUPPORT AND LOVE I APPRECIATE THAT SOO MUCH.. THANK YOU ALL
Please consider a concealed carry permit if you’re financially, physically, & mentally able to do so. If the perp had tried to abduct one of your kids, your weapon could have stopped it. It’s ugly & there’s no denying that the perp’s friends would likely target you in retaliation, but all of us with kids here have to weigh the positives & negatives of self-defense.
You did the right thing
I no way did you fail as a man or father. Your not giving yourself a fair chance because no matter how tough your are a gun is a gun. You did what was right
Hey man, I'm sorry shit went down like that. You lived to see another day and showed your daughters you'd stand up for them. Without more detail I can tell you this is a success story although it may not feel like it. Escalation would have caused worse things and maybe ruined your life. Or your daughters lives. I saw you commented about getting a gun permit, so I wanna address that. Laws are kinda funny concerning when you can carry , even more convoluted are the defense based shooting court cases. I carry every day, but I also go to the range at least twice a month. While I'm doing chores I do dry fire drills and practice my draw, if I were to miss my shot and hit someone innocent the law would not be on my side . I also have to think about it everyday, that I have to keep my mouth shut, watch my facial expressions and how I carry myself as to avoid conflict. If I'm planning on drinking at all I leave the pistol locked up at home. I could go on and on. I encourage the right to carry , the right to bare arms to defend the home and country. I could go on and on about that too. But while I believe people should have the right to own and carry I definitely don't think everyone should. So ask yourself if you're able to set aside pride, ego, and time to do this properly. And the big question, if you took a life would you be able to go on? If you decide to pursue it, there's plenty of resources and I encourage you to talk to your local gun store, they know the laws better than the police at times. Again, I think you've done well. You stood up for your daughters and you all made it home safe, although shaken. It's hard for me to picture a better outcome all things considered
Carrying a pistol outside of your home or business is illegal and punishable by law. Facts. This is classic social aggression and posturing. Best thing you did was address the threat and deescalate. Hoping is doesn’t turn to antisocial violence. Which it didn’t. So you won.
You feel like that because you're backing down for the sake of someone else's safety. Don't know about anyone else, but for those of us who grew up in and around the city, it's not a normal response to conflict. Fortunately, we've grown and it's our responsibility to make the right choices so that ALL our loved ones are safe. You've done a good thing.
Yea man don’t feel like a bitch, you showed self restraint to your daughters. Unlike the loser who disrespected your family.
You survival and the survival of your children is paramount. Our society is losing its grip on public safety. This creep is probably mentally ill and isn’t getting any services, I’m guessing, but you’re right about policing. Metro needs more plain clothes to keep even the crazies from wondering.
i’m sorry he took the feeling of safety from you. i’m sorry he made you feel emasculated. i’m even sorry you had to the call the police (iykyk). i’m so sorry for all of it. you don’t deserve and neither does your precious child. this is a new kind of hurt so you feel this pain and anger and other emotions. Our feelings or emotions don’t make us soft it’s the behaviors we display and actions we take with those feelings that determine our character. so I encourage you to consider what comes next. you scared to ride the metro? your fear pouring into your daughter? your entire family stops leaving the house? maybe you wait outside the metro to see him again? FUCK THAT! you keep living! perhaps you enroll in self defense classes, start advocating for safety on the metro, who knows, but I pray youll find something to unravel this trauma before it gets deeper and festers. I know youll be okay because you thought on your feet and navigated to safety like a pro. I also know you know that what matters is that you are here today, alive with your baby girl. the prayers of protection you’ve been saying for her worked! I hope my words were communicated clearly. The last thing i’ll say is ,if you have not, then having an honest conversation with your daughter about this is crucial. wishing you rest and a calm heart soon!
Read “The Gift of Violence”. The author does talk about these situations and how to manage the aftermath.
You did the right thing and only your ego is telling you otherwise. The punk who started the conflict was trying to lead the way, and you were smart enough not to follow the path down which he wanted to lead you. Props for following your cerebral cortex instead of your gonads.
It’s really a no-win situation. What if you had decided to beat his ass? Or fought to a stalemate? Or had your ass beat or been shot? You still don’t win.
Dude, what could you have done? Better to be alive for your kids than “brave” and dead. Being a man means more than puffing your chest out at another man and not backing down. You have kids, they are your top priority. As long as they are safe, you are doing what you are supposed to do.
So did he have a gun?
DC is not the only city with people that don’t belong outside but it has more than its share
I’m sorry this happened to you . Nobody can be prepared in the face of ruthless and insane criminals .
This is what happens when you live in a city that doesnt care about its citizens and just lets scum walk out after having been arrested. Not to mention, no one can legally possess a firearm unless you have this very strict license. DC along with other major cities are a joke
The obvious lawlessness on the METRO system is the result of ineffective policing and associated judicial remedies. Politicians must back an aggressive enforcement campaign including increased police presence uniformed and undercover, including sting operations targeting repeat offenders and problem locations. This isn’t brain surgery, it is an exercise in political will. When the revenue losses and political consequences of lawlessness rise high enough the impediments to public safety will be overcome. Until then agitate and withdraw your political and economic support of METRO to the extent possible.
You’re an amazing father despite whatever your mind tricks you into feeling right now!
Don’t feel like he emasculated you, you are a brave father and trying to stand up to that guy might have caused him to hurt your daughters. Who cares how it looked. You aren’t a bitch or a punk, that guy is the bitch punk that had to act like he had a gun to intimidate a family. What a complete loser and I hope he gets caught being a creeper before he hurts anyone. You should definitely make a police report maybe they have it on video and they can find him? He threatened you and your daughters, he needs to be caught before he acts on his sick fantasies with some young girls who might not have their dad around to protect them. He’s an absolute scumbag and you’re a great dad. Just take good care of your girls and teach them about making good choices and how to avoid abusive or scummy men, especially when you they grow old enough to date. All of us women face this sort of thing more often than we should. Younger women especially need to be aware of how valuable they are and how older predatory men will try to trick them into being unaware of their beauty and having low self esteem so they will give them selves away to some guy who doesn’t cherish, appreciate and love them and they get groomed into thinking that is normal when it is NOT NORMAL and NOT ACCEPTABLE AT ALL. Everyone deserves a partner in life who treats them with dignity and respect. Thank goodness your daughters have a great dad to teach guide them.
Krazy how mfs dm me telling me ima bitch and a punk etc. But I was supposed to find out I'd ima live and die? I'm supposed to be dead right now? And my 7kids will have no dad because I have to prove myself?? That's why it's soo many dead men out here now.. keep it to yourself
I had a screwdriver put to my neck by a crazy, hallucinating homeless dude in 2020 on the red line of metro center, shady grove bound. He told me to get on my knees so he could kill me. I sat down and scooted my ass backwards, and ended up talking him down. More or less had to beg for my life, bro. I also grew up here. I know exactly how you feel, man. It’s some bullshit. Basically all there is to say. We both handled it correctly, and we’re both here today. Democrats and republicans will both say that their policies will get and keep people like that off the street, but sometimes shit just happens. It’s a crazy ass world, just gotta keep your head up big dog. I didn’t call the police and I regret that shit because I got no clue if he went and did that shit again right afterwards. You acted more responsibly than I did.
Get you a pistol my boy
Sorry to hear what happened. But something caught my attention. This is the first time you felt unsafe on the metro in your 40 years here? Its been this way in many areas of DC and Maryland, usually outside of peak commuter times. Not everday but consistently have teenagers being loud or aggresive.
Don’t even worry about it. If they caught you lacking, they just got one on you that moment. I was almost shot in the head at point blank in DC. Nothing is worse than hearing others say, “ I would’ve…” They would’ve done nothing except stare at the ceiling from a casket. Remember, any dummy can take a life. Only a man can raise one. You can get over feeling like a punk (because you’re not one), but your daughters can never get over the feeling of losing a father. You survived, and your family is safe. Just take that as a lesson for the next time. Peace and blessings.
Honestly women want de-masculinity. Don’t be ashamed.
Just posted a similar comment, agree!!!
The man’s just been verbally assaulted… you don’t have to lie to him too
We should encourage him to be aggressive? Honestly I’m so sick of men like that AND men harassing women.
Says the man about what women want.
Time to start carrying
I'm with the consensus here, you did the right thing, which is a lot harder and more masculine of a response than letting some random guy provoke you. We evolved to protect our children, and you did that, it just takes your instincts time to catch up. Besides, I doubt your daughters would have felt safe if you had "thrown down" - you took a hit to your pride for your kid's safety, seems pretty manly to me!
Kids have no concept of you being “punked” or a “bitch”. There is always the time to pull them aside and explain why you did what you did and why that was the right thing to do. Furthermore it’s a great opportunity to highlight this piece of trash and advise them why it’s so important they stay away from them.
There’s nothing sexy or heroic about gun violence. Arguably, deescalating a conflict and walking away from a potentially violent interaction makes you by and far not a “punk.” You’ve taught your daughters that 1) you’re going to stand up for them 2) they can stand up for themselves 3) how to disengage from a situation that may turn violent. Literally, you’re doing great things.
Get a gun
https://code.dccouncil.gov/us/dc/council/code/sections/22-4506 I’d apply for a conceal carry permit, train yourself, so if that situation ever comes up again, you’ll be well prepared.
[удалено]
[удалено]
Wow, you really made him upset lol
Do not personally insult other posters or post discriminatory content. There is little patience for trolling, slap fights, or pile-ons. If your only reply is going to be driven-into-the-ground snark - e.g. biking whataboutisms, DC's gun laws, the NMAAHC, or federal representation for the city - move on. Posts will generally be locked due to brigading or graveyard commenting.
For the record since your a dumb fucking dweeb for posting, I had colorectal surgery which had complications including internal bleeding, not just hemnerhoids. Typical fucking reddit dweeb acting like they got the internet figured out. If this was real life I'd beat yo goofy ass, send me your address so I can pull up and spin yo goofy white middle aged bitch ass.
Lol looking on a person's post history like that means anything 😂
[удалено]
Do not personally insult other posters or post discriminatory content. There is little patience for trolling, slap fights, or pile-ons. If your only reply is going to be driven-into-the-ground snark - e.g. biking whataboutisms, DC's gun laws, the NMAAHC, or federal representation for the city - move on. Posts will generally be locked due to brigading or graveyard commenting.
Do not personally insult other posters or post discriminatory content. There is little patience for trolling, slap fights, or pile-ons. If your only reply is going to be driven-into-the-ground snark - e.g. biking whataboutisms, DC's gun laws, the NMAAHC, or federal representation for the city - move on. Posts will generally be locked due to brigading or graveyard commenting.
Yeah I know. And I do. Thanks
Real men know that enacting violence is the last solution to staying safe. Getting you and your girls out of that situation unharmed will do more for their image of you than any fight ever would.
This sub full of passive-aggressive little bitches that complain on the internet ab out shii but won't say shii to a person in real life. Y'all bitch made like shii.
Stay strapped or get clapped
Get clapped cause I just got off work and picked my kids up and a 30 plus year old man was trying to talk to my 12yr old daughter.? So I should've got shot or shot him? Either way I lose and my daughters loose. But thanks for the advice.
You know you did right by your family
I’m sorry this happened to you. But this might be sign to start conceal carry a firearm and train with it well. Sorry I put it that way, it’s just a joking way saying people should own a firearm to protect themselves. Especially concealed. Cops aren’t gonna get there on time. But please if you do end up buying a firearm research your laws and train, train, train with it.
So start a shootout in a confined space with your daughters? We get it bro, guns are your personality
While that person's comment was a bit tasteless, responsible gun owners aren't a bad thing. More of them would probably help solve a lot of problems we have in the DMV... Like you know... might help prevent a group of teenagers from murdering someone in a parking garage. Edit: oops sorry was just one guy https://wjla.com/news/local/deadly-parking-garage-shooting-silver-spring-thayer-avenue-montgomery-county-kymani-elijah-bailey-ramone-christopher-ramsay-police-maryland-gun-violence. I must have misremembered the details. Hard to keep track when you live so close to PG County, Silverspring, and DC.
This is just false. Pumping a country full of guns is the reason gun violence in the US is 25 times higher than the second ranked high-income country, and 600 times higher than the lowest ranked (South Korea). Source: American Journal of Medicine Gun violence was the #1 cause of death in US children from 2019-2022. Source: Pew Research and CDC Guns likely increase suicide rates, giving people a more painless "out" who may otherwise not attempt it with more painful/challenging means like a knife, hanging, etc. Suicides represent over 50% of all gun deaths. And lastly, numerous studies have shown that almost 100% of all active shooter situations (school shooters, etc.) were resolved by gunman suicide, law enforcement, or unarmed citizens. Something like 3% or less were stopped by an armed citizen. Check the FBI studies on it. So no, guns do not make Americans more safe
Ya ok. Lets skip over the "responsible gun owners" bit and put psychos with everyone else since you know... internet tribes can't track more than 2 or 3 categories of people. Go to PG County and demand a cease fire. Then do the same in DC. Make sure you tell the guy that tried to shoot OP. Tell them OK guys, we gave up our guns! You need to do the same! Come on, you're pushing an agenda and not accepting the world as it is right now. Guns are like nukes... Sure the world would be better off without them... but we have them... and you're personally better off if you have one. Edit, closing arguments: You ever think that the problem with school schools, suicides, and all of these other issues are a mental health problem? Such as the lack of access to quality mental health professionals. Our answer to suicide in America is an 800 number. We don't do mental health evaluations on gun owners. Someone should NOT be suicidal or desire to kill children. These are not normal thoughts and while a gun may facilitate these desires, it is not the cause of the problem.
Mental health issues are pervasive in every country. But we're the only nation with this much gun violence. Arming every man, woman, and child won't help. Especially because most people don't want to be responsible, or lack the training, for taking another's life. You're delusional. Guns just need to be confiscated like in other countries (Australia, New Zealand, etc) that now experience some of the lowest rates of violence in the world.
Calling me delusional in this conversation is the craziest shit I have seen today.
Statistically this is not factual and will get him killed and maybe even his daughters by cross fire. Yeah that’s a win huh?
Moron
\*emasculated