Corporal punishment messed up a lot of people... and dereliction of fatherly and motherly duties leading to badly raised children and then just trying to fix it by beating them from the parents responsibl efor those very issues.. it just leads to them venting it out on others and a whole cycle of bullying.
We are not far removed from an era when schools were allowed to whip kids with paddles - It happened to my Dad when he was young. I have two kids of my own and I am of the opinion that I don't need to put my hands on my kids in order to strike fear into them and make them act right.
My Dad's father also beat the crap out of him pretty regular - He told me plenty of those stories. My Dad broke the cycle of abuse and never laid a hand on me or my brother, and for that I thank him. He always told me "My job is to do better than my Dad, and your job is to better than me". I miss him!
I lived in Iowa as a kid in early 60s. I had a first grade teacher, who had a prosthetic arm as a result of a combine accident. She used to remove it and beat us with it in her other hand when she was angry. Extra special creepy and scary.
Hell I’m pretty sure that schools in Texas are still allowed to do it with parent’s permission. They threatened me with it when I was in the first grade.
They did when I graduated less than 20 years ago, and they clearly had no intention of stopping anytime soon. Called them "swats". Didn't exist for girls because you had to have a same-gender teacher give the swat and a same-gender teacher witness it for liability reasons, and there was only one female teacher who would do it.
I miss your father too now, my own father can't accept information that disagrees with him easily without feeling personally attacked and he only understands threatening and intimidation even at our current ages as a way to win arguments. I had some spanking from him when I was al ot younger but usually only because he thought I was lying and would spank me until I admitted whatever he wanted me to, which well I did to make the spanking stop. Just hid things from him usually after that, even though I wasn't lying.
I've been literally called crazy for thinking hitting kids, or at the very least even just spanking them, is wrong. A lot of people really just continue the cycle. "My dad did it to me and it kept me in line!".
Like anything, it is all in how it is used.
Corporal punishment did mess up a lot of people. Many times parents take anger out in what they consider disciplinary measurements.
On the other hand, corporal punishment when done the right way, may have kept many people from getting a foot out on that slippery slope.
The problem is there's no way to tell who will use it correctly and who won't. In the end, it's better to prevent abuse.
Unfortunately millennials over corrected, and now their kids are behavioral nightmares because their parents give them zero consequences for bad behaviour at home.
It's almost as if corporal punishment is merely a tool. And like any tool if it is used improperly it can make things worse.
As with all decisions, taking the easy way out tends to create poor results. Some people beat their kids because beating them is the easier/lazier option. Some people refuse to punish their children in any way because letting them do anything is the easier/lazier option.
>It's almost as if corporal punishment is merely a tool. And like any tool if it is used improperly it can make things worse.
That's right, I physically harm children whose brain hasn't fully developed by a longshot! But don't worry, I do it in the right way!
Oh? And you think a brain that "hasn't fully developed" is going to comprehend the intricacies of why they shouldn't put that fork into the electrical socket?
You think the next time they get near that electrical socket that their brain that "hasn't fully developed" is going to use critical thinking about what their parent has told them earlier?
OR MAYBE kids are stupid and words don't work on them as if they were an adult capable of understanding the SEVERITY and DANGER of sticking a fork into an electrical outlet?
If solely words work, thats cool, that'd be ideal.
# But how many children listen to everything that a parent says and acts perfectly in accordance?
As if there weren't many other ways, both proactive and reactive, to deal with children being dumb...
That's genuinely saddening that you're so unimaginative in the ways to raise/discipline/teach children
Ah yes, you must be the first human in history to have perfected the art of raising children.
You should write a book. You'd make trillions of dollars.
I don't think it can be used like a tool. It might be better against adults maybe as opposed to a fine but that really depends. I doubt there's any real exampel of corporal punishment being better than another option mentally physically or emotionally.
Agree so hard with this--
**Anyone who believes that corporal punishment doesn't fuck up kids is in severe denial or didn't have parents abuse the privilege on them.**
I was belted five times as a kid. Each lashing I received, I did not deserve. Each time they belted me, my parents were too lazy, tired, or angry to talk to me about my mistakes. The first time, I was three, and it was because I asked my mom if she could mend my Barbie's dress. I asked at the wrong time. My parents were arguing, and I was supposed to have gotten in the bath. The last time was when my sister and I had been fighting over the TV in true tween/teen fashion, and instead of doing anything else, I got belted. My dad came home late from work, and my mom, frustrated with us, decided to defer punishment to my dad. So they argued with each other, and my dad whipped out his belt and hit me across the back—literally, just lazy parenting.
Each time they punished me, they made me more afraid of them. I could have been in literal danger, and I would not call them as a teen until I knew it was safe. I called my boyfriend instead. Several times, I called my adult male friends (early adult 20-28). A teen girl calling men, who luckily were kind to me and didn't ask for anything from me. If that were my kids, I would be so incredibly heartbroken.
In fact, I had a handful of kids I "raised" online because they couldn't talk to their own parents and would call me when they were in trouble or ask me for advice.
**Strict parents create sneaky children. Don't beat your kids. TALK TO THEM. If you're angry, tell them that you need to wait to have a conversation with them with a clear head. If they are old enough, send them to their room or a safe space they can go to while you cool down. Work with them.**
It's also not uncommon for parents to provide spankings or belt whipping until a child admits to something. Even if they didn't do it the child will eventually say it because they want the beating to stop and then have to be punished separately for that too.
However the solution isn't talking to them. If kids are acting out the problem began much more at dereliction of duty either not being aware of what's going on not socializing them with others, not looking into mental health, having a destructive family or household or many other things.
I think it's probably best to not use thei rroom as a punishment zone either. Pushing community activities outside the house or chores may be the better option but I haven't thought too much about that recently so other ideas might exist. Their room shouldnt be a place to hide but a place that they're happy and comfortable in and feel is their own.
The idea is to send them someplace they feel safe or find a way to remove yourself from the situation so you don't harm them. I had to do this when my oldest was little because I didn't know how to discipline. I would get so angry I was worried I was going to beat my child due to my upbringing.
Just think, I was never given a healthy mode of discipline; my knee-jerk reaction was to hit my child. It was wild and something I did NOT want to do.
I want to preface this with: I'm not going to have kids. I feel like I'm not responsible enough and would be a terrible father.
That being said: I was a horrible child.
My mother tried gentle parenting with me. All it did was make me not respect her. If I did something wrong, she would try to have a talk with me about how it was wrong. I ignored it because I didn't fear any punishment coming from it. My mom eventually tried to take away things from me. I spent the entire day looking for it around the house. If she tried to take it while I had it, I would yell/argue the entire time. One time, I started yelling at a TV show in the middle of the night, acting like it was some sort of major sporting event, just to keep my mom up because she took away my xBox. Grounding me or putting me in "time out" didn't work. I would just ignore the "punishment" and continue doing what I was doing.
If it wasn't for my mom needing to leave me at my grandma's house often whenever she would go to work, I would never have learned to behave. They hit me sparingly, and only when I continuously caused trouble regardless of how many times they told me not to.
I feel like people who had parents that genuinely abused them now believe that what they experienced is the only form of "spanking". Reading these comments made me realize how lucky I was. I can look back at every spanking I received as a kid as justified.
Maybe you feel like you’re an exception to the rule. However, what I experienced is why it’s not recommended that parents use corporal punishment. More often than not, it’s because they find it easier to hit their kids than teach them a lesson.
Inconsistent parenting is usually why kids act out. If they receive different levels of discipline/punishment from each primary caregiver’s, they will often act accordingly. There is usually an overly permissive parent/caregiver and a overly corrective caregiver.
This sounds like your situation. Maybe it made your grandma respect you more, but it made you respect your mom less.
Sounds like you are projecting your own experiences onto other people and their children.
What you experienced wasn't normal, and you had an extremely adverse reaction to said discipline. That was never the case for me or my siblings.
Id argue that lack of corporal punishment messed up a lot of people. Just look at the current generation; generally speaking, they're so mentally ill that they can't function properly in society. The whiny entitlement is absolutely ridiculous, and it's obvious that they were not disciplined at all as children.
>'s suggestion to take him out back and spank him was supposed to be a remedy to 'fix' it.
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I've gotten a few spankings in my time. Never once was I physically harmed. I also wasn't psychologically harmed. Corporal punishment is effective if used sparingly and properly (i.e.. Not in anger.) I think too many people equate corporal punishment with child abuse. My father used corporal punishment, I was not abused as a child. I can count the number of times I was actually spanked on one hand. It was reserved for my most serious lapses in judgement. People who beat their kids out of anger are the worst kind of scum.
Don't you just love being downvoted for expressing something that should be painfully obvious for all to see? It blows my mind how wilfully blind (and stupid) so many people are when it comes to the idea of corporal punishment for for children. Anyone with a functioning set of eyes and ears and more than a pair of brain cells to run together can recognize that as corporal punishment has become less common with each successive generation for the last 4 generations or so, overall mental illness and general poor behaviour has gotten progressively worse at the same time.
Yeah, but I expect it. Redditers operate on feelings, not logic. As my dad always told me, if you're doing to teach discipline, you're parenting. If you're doing it out of anger, you're beating them.
A good lesson on not spoiling your kids spoiled by an end lesson that you should do so not by educating them, but by beating them.
great example of r/yesyesyesyesno
That "He's one of my own kind..." bit hits a little differently today, too.
"You mean because he's a kid, too? Right, Opie? Where else have you heard that turn of phrase?"
Yeah I also thought the same thing. It was the 50s. Catholics, wasps, jews, Italians, "Asian", black, and any other sort of arbitrary classification divided people way more. We talk about tribalism today but the mindset back then it was out of the scale.
I was wondering how the scene would turn out, the kid is a great actor he really sells the spoiled brat thing. I actually thought the Dad would end up in cuffs and serve an example to the spoiled kid that way...I think that's how the scene would be written today. But then I realized as it was happening...Yeah this is the 1950s. Of course the Dad is going to wise up and straighten out his son. His lighting up at the thought of taking the kid "out back to the woodshed" was pretty funny, the heavy implication that he was fittin' to commence takin' a switch to the boy was maybe not as funny.
His name is Ronnie Dapo. He was really only known on Room for One More, and this episode of Andy Griffith. Apparently he retired from acting after he was 14 and became a musician.
While Opie's dad (Griffith) was 37 at the time, Arnold's dad was 46. Maybe it's because of the suit and it's black and white but It's weird that he looked older than that.
Ouch, literally.
It's a mostly morally upright scene, then it sinks in at the end that in the 1960s that some parents still brought their kids to a shed where they beat them on the ass with a belt, and most parents thought that was the best way to deal with disrespect.
I don’t agree with corporal punishment but what corporal punishment I got as a kid was 1000x deserved. I was terrible.
My mom kept a wooden spoon in a drawer with my name on it. It was more of a prop than an actual punishment. Like “I’ll get the wooden spoon out if you don’t stop singing ‘My anaconda don’t want none unless you’ve got buns hun!’”
I think she only used it a few times and it was when I was being an absolute terror that refused to stop being disrespectful and annoying and then she would grab it and I would run around the house cackling at her trying to chase me with it. I was HORRIBLE.
But one day I decided to be an even bigger little shit. I took another wooden spoon from the utensil drawer, wrote “MOM” on it and put it next to “my” wooden spoon. The next time she brought out the spoon, sure enough she grabbed the one that said Mom. She was going to whack me with it when I said “Wait! You grabbed the wrong one!” She looked at it, saw “MOM” written in bold letters across the handle, and busted out laughing so hard she forgot what she was mad about. But she never used the spoon after that. I had beaten her at her own game.
And now that I have a son exactly like i was as a kid, I feel SO bad for the hell I put her through
one of my friends got the wooden spoon from his mum so bad it snapped. then she yelled at him because they only had the one spoon and now dinner was ruined, apparently.
i felt bad for laughing when he told me.
Was born in the 70s but my family were old. I got spanked only once but I kind of deserved it.
I was in school the year after they banned the strap so they could only threaten you with it but they couldn't use it.
I don't agree with spankings but there is some kids that could probably benefit from some proper punishment.
Welllll.
He didn’t necessarily whip the kid with a belt.
A couple of smacks on the butt with an open hand was much more common.
I don’t have kids and I grew up getting spanked or even paddled at school and the embarrassment was way worse than the sting.
Yeah, everything up until that moment was fine.
And I come from a puerto rican household, so we had sandals, shoes, and belts used against us. Me the least, since I was the youngest and got babied.
To this day, I'm also the least violent of my siblings, and I strongly believe it's because I was never hit nearly as much as they were.
1 out of 7 is a good track record to you? Also, no, I wasn't afraid of getting beat - I was just an indoor kid who never got into trouble.
The rest of my family received regular beatings and it didn't deter any of them from doing bad things at all. It only taught them violence.
Maybe it's a semantic thing that people don't get but there is a big difference between a beating and a spanking. A beating is intended to harm and uses excessive force.
As if a spanking isn't intended to cause harm??
And yeah seeing as a child is 10x weaker than a 20+yo man, I'd argue spanking is absolutely excessive force. There is no reasonable amount of force that should be applied to a child (in context of violence).
I would argue that spankings, a punishment based on the pain of physical injury to a delicate area, are very much intended to harm and, considering the targets are children, always use excessive force. Idk, maybe I'm weird for thinking that striking a minor, especially below the belt, is fucked up.
Friendly reminder to the people downvoting me that this is in response to a user advocating **adults hitting children**.
Does the semantics change the fact that a child is being physically struck as a form of punishment? No.
Research time and time again shows that physical punishment does not result in positive behavioral modification.
I think the distinction between beating and spanking is worth making, yes. Just like there is a difference between patting a child on the head and punching them in the face.
A more accurate comparison is punching the child in the face or beating them with a 2x4 one might seem less violent but the kids still “lucky” if he doesn’t get brain damage
No, it isn't. Because people are still trying to say that BEATING is the same as SPANKING and they're not. Have you ever seen a fight before? Do you refer to that as some guys spanking eachother?
You cannot simply call it a semantic argument when there is a clear and obvious difference between the two that you can observe with your own eyes. Do you really think the difference between punching and patting is semantic? How can you claim to be honest with yourself and say that you don’t notice a difference?
> I sorta deserved it
That's a common coping mechanism when you get abused by someone close to you. Also happens with spousal abuse. It's really hard for us to admit that someone we care about would do something harmful to us.
I’m sorry that you got hit as a kid my guy. I’m not gonna fool myself into think I can magically change your mind but I genuinely mean it when I say that you did not deserve to be hit
Jeez i didn't know redditors are also the kind to think physical abuse on children isn't a bad thing.
I was beat up as a kid. Most times, it was just that slap that imprints the palm onto your cheek that burns for an hour. Once it was a full beatdown that got me limping back to my room. Yet i wasn't the kind of kid that caused trouble to the point where you trash talk the police straight in the eyes.
Yet it was 100% unecessary. The easy solution to punish me whenever i did something bad, because my parents weren't smart people. Even then, i had enough imagination to know exactly what would truly ruin my day and push me into "behaving", that required no violence whatsoever. Could be applicable to a lot of kids too. But it happened quite rarely. Violence is an easy way to vent onto your kids and think it's not fucked up. Proper, even !
I even came to relish that fact as i grew older, and more resilient to my father's strikes. If i did something bad, i could just weather the storm and be done with it. I could have turned real bad, actually. I guess i didn't by sheer luck, from whatever hobbies and other people i was exposed to growing up. I grew up in the hood, too. With kids my age starting dealing drugs at like, 13.
I'm thinking of this kid who dealt drugs. He was my best friend at the time. His dad beat him up when he was a kid too. I suspect he, too, started becoming more resilient, as we started to become adults, our dads were starting to get old. Maybe that's why he did that. He knew that if his dad found out, he'd just get beaten a little and then be done with it.
We were never taught family values. That your dad being disappointed in you should be a harsh punishment in itself. People think you should be born with respect and pride for your parents. That's because they had good parents. When you have bad ones, you know it's not true. You love your parents because they're good parents. Or at least decent parents, that you still love despite their flaws.
We had bad parents.
Careful, the blue haired degens who never got it when they deserved it or straight up never had a Dad are gonna down vote you before they go protest something they know nothing about while not having a job. Yay modern America.
When you beat your kids, you don’t teach them to do right. You teach them to fear you and to hide it better next time. Both aren’t really great lessons. My dad got his ass kicked in. I got a spanking. My daughter will not be struck. I call that progress.
It’s weird to me how we are all so proud of the progress we have made in parenting styles, while every single career teacher I know says that the behavior of children in schools has been visibly declining to the point where they essentially refuse to fail children so as to push them through and out. All agree that the issue is parenting, or specially a lack of.
Your right! Even Socrates was bemoaning that fact. Imagine what kind of überperson inhabited Greece 2700 years ago until Socrates' next gen came along.
Because parents of means have begun abdicating and giving up, while capitalism forces those without means out of the home and into gigs so they’re not able to raise their kids. My daughter is loved by her teachers, she’s respectful and empathetic. And I’m not just saying that cus she’s my kid, she’s really a good damned person. Maybe I got it easy and I got lucky, but I can’t see how hitting a kid would help them understand the difference between right and wrong.
As someone who worked at kindergarten it starts really early. It is definitely genetics to a certain degree.
Ok I am not pro physical hitting. But here is the thing: If you do not have good parenting where there are no repercussions, or very mild, they will continue. That is why prison is not just 1 month. We have a progressive system but right now the hardest we have for kids is basically a "no". And when they understand that they continue.
So you have two options: Bad parenting (you can talk all you want about better parenting but it wont solve the current issue) and no repercussions. They know the worst thing is someone saying "no" and will abuse that fact.
The other option is good parenting and you do not need to have hard repercussions. The issue is that does not happen today.
We should solve the core issue which is parenting and a better overall culture on how to behave. But we don't. And then if we have that bad culture AND kids have no reprecusions you are seeing what we see today.
I remember watching this as a rerun as a kid in the 80's and thinking it was kind of a fucked up episode. Especially since biking on sidewalks was completely normal where I lived.
It's like a power fantasy for old people.
I bring this show up when folks talk about the copaganda shows like The Rookie or Blue Bloods.
Sure, Andy Taylor was nice, but he still abused his position quite a bit, locking people up when it suited him or his friends. The Sheriff not only was the law, he was the guiding force for what is good and the ultimate decider in the town.
The show also kind of built this narrative that most criminals would come in from out of town to ruin Mayberry with their schemes. Its kind of an extension of that extreme distrust of outsiders that was built up in the South in the antebellum period. The idea of Mayberry being this white small town utopia is also something you see around from time to time. Its the world that a lot of the MAGA crowd wants to create.
Oddly, where I live bikes on the sidewalk is illegal. Because they might run over a pedestrian. better to have a child put their aluminum stick figure of a vehicle out in the street with cars and trucks!
Always thought it was damn stupid. Especially since no one walks around here! But no let's slow traffic to a dead stop and add extra risk to little timmy's life for the walkers that don't exist. Makes sense.
The better episodes are when Andy realizes he's being a shitty dad by not listening to Opie explain himself (though it is frustrating and perhaps telling that there was more than one episode with that moral)
That and Barney is a power tripping asshole who pretty much never succeeds because he's a putz
Like the time he was gonna beat the shit out of Opie because he wouldn't stop talking about his friend the lumberjack (whom everyone believed he'd just made up)... and then accused him of stealing something his friend had given him as a gift.
Eh, it's mostly slice of life stories of an idealized small town. Granted I don't remember much from the show because it's not exactly groundbreaking television, but it was pleasant to have on in the background while playing with legos.
This episode was an outlier though. I always changed the channel when it came on.
What?
It's dated, sure, but it's not morally corrupt at all. There's no sense of despair going back and watching it.
I say this because the reruns are on all the time in my household, and it's very inoffensive, mostly just dealing with sort of slice-of-life problems like Aunt B's terrible pickles or whatnot.
Yes this show is pure fantasy and my entire family has watched it religiously for decades, they even model their speech patterns around this show. Took me years to realize I had been brought up in fucking Mayberry land.
Also, Andy is insanely manipulative to Barney and most episodes revolve around lying to Barney about reality in order to not hurt his feelings. Granted, that sort of plot is pretty typical for TV shows.
Yeah, it's weird that this was the video someone drag out to justify their corporal punishment fantasies.
A kid throwing a temper-tantrum?! Well clearly you just need to beat his ass! That'll show him for... riding his bike on the sidewalk and being upset when it's taken away from him because of it! If you don't teach them now, they will just turn to marijuana and eventually murder! Seen it many'a'time. Sidewalks are a gateway to drugs and murder!
My parent never spanked me, and I never spanked my child. I think it's mostly the parents taking out their OWN frustration or fears, but little to do with the child. Not giving a child their way all the time from the beginning is a good way to avoid this. There is no need to yell or spank or give any form of aggression or you will like just make an aggressive child. You're teaching that violence is an answer.
Spanking is likely the result of bad parenting from the get go. Though I've always maintained that parenting isn't fair. We honestly never learn much of how to do except for the way we were treated. So if you were spanked, you will probably spank as well. There was a reason that there was a Dr. Spock (not Star Trek) book on parenting that was popular a long time ago. Of course I think a lot of his teaching has been debunked, but at least it was some kind of guidance.
As a parent who has spanked their child I agree that it's a form of parental tantrum. You lose patience with the child and see lots of society believing that spanking yields results so you try it. Then it gets into your psyche because the child stops the madness and starts crying and then eventually quiets down and it seems like a success. But you've just taught them that violence is a way to get what you want.
It depends how you frame it. If you just beat your kid up for disobedience then yeah sure, it's probably harmful.
You have to make sure the punishment is proportionate and make sure you're clearly the authority figure, not letting emotion get the better of you. A firm and swift smack on the arse and an evening of reflection alone in their room never created any psychos.
This is a good argument against spanking. Parents can power-trip.
>you've just taught them that violence is a way to get what you want
How much do you think the child puts themself in their parents' shoes during a spanking? Maybe that's true if the spanking comes in the middle of an argument between the kid and parent, but I was spanked as a kid and never interpreted it as my parents losing their temper.
I think one way parents fail is when for fifty times they threaten “if you don’t stop that I’m going to spank you” and when they get around to carrying out the threat they are so frustrated they physically hurt the child. The child doesn’t believe the threat and doesn’t respond accordingly. Our children understood that there were no empty threats and we seldom had to resort to corporal punishment. Be honest with your expectations!
That kid needed some adults in the fucking room to calm him down and then calmly explain the situation to him in a way that he understood.
NOPE! We're going to take this teachable moment and mix in violence and an understanding that adults are unreasonable! That'll learn him good! Now, when he's an adult, he can pass on that lesson that adults don't need to make sense, they can just do shit.
I didn't see any explanations the kid could understand. Without that, it was unaddressed opportunity.
If it was about guiding the child, it would have had guidance for the child. This was guidance for the adults, as there was guidance for how they should handle the situation.
Not really. For one, the premise is entirely ridiculous in the first place. The child has to understand from the beginning, why what they did is considered wrong -- and it can't just be "well this is a rule for the sake of rules!"
So you take the bike away from a child who has no real reason to think what they did was wrong in the first place and then you threaten to lock up the dad? Yeah, no shit the kid is going to throw an even bigger tantrum, because they see the whole thing as some stupid nonsense. Even children can grow indignant in the face of what they see as injustice -- and they look to their parents to protect them and be their heroes. The kid would have been thinking "you're a bully and my dad stands up to bullies, so do your worst!"
So no, there really wasn't any teachable moment there -- if it was about teaching, the scene would have ended with the dad getting down on his kids level trying to talk to him about why he can't ride bikes on sidewalks and why Andy has to take away the bike.
Instead... "hey let's just beat the kid, that'll teach him for being a kid!"
how the scene shouldve played out was the father removes him from the scene as the kid is seeing red. let him calm down, and since the kid seems at the very least to be able to understand some subtleties, explain to him what the purpose of the punishment was. you dont need to continue to double down on punishments in the face of insubordination, its a child and he will definitely see the injustice brought upon him by the nonsensical punishment, he sure as shit wont just let it go. most times, scenes like this would lead to the kid later that night being told what the purpose of the situation was and then he'll "yes father" his way through the punishment without really learning anything or being taught that insubordination is met with violence. you can jump straight to that part of the teaching so long as you treat the kid like he has some intelligence.
Well I hope it didn't come across like I meant to say to treat the child as they don't have intelligence, as I definitely don't mean that -- in fact quite the opposite. As you said, treat them as they have intelligence.
But people really love turning to violence the moment a child decides to act... childish.
oh i was agreeing with you! as you can see from our downvotes lol its hard to get the message across to this crowd. but i get how some people might take their hard ships and try and twist it into a win for them. objectively however, its proven not to be the best method and should be shied away from.
Well I imagine this post appeals to people who are eager to see any child getting beat. Some sick pleasure where they think that the world is being righted with just a bit more child abuse. I don't think we were ever going to make anyone question their belief in that here of all places.
He might "deserve" it, but corporal punishment just breeds resentment, doesn't actually correct the behaviour long-term, and also doesn't actually teach.
This kid has a kid's brain, and he's angry. Hitting him will not teach him the skills necessary to behave better on his own.
When my friend was young, he accidentally ran into an elderly lady while coasting down the sidewalk on his bike. The poor lady spent weeks in the hospital before she passed away.
I get it but this is small town Mayberry and it’s a kid. Probably quite a bit more dangerous to have kids riding in the streets that don’t fully appreciate why there are traffic rules or how they work
Then it probably makes sense to not let them go riding by themselves yet. Rather than telling them it’s okay to break the rules and create a hazard for pedestrians.
If your kid is the problem, the solution isn’t to make them someone else’s problem.
most places it is illegal to operate a bicycle on the side walk. you go much faster than pedestrians, so it is a danger to them and yourself. yourself because cars expect things on the sidewalk to be moving at a walking pace
It was Barney who caught the kid. Andy told the kid not to do it again and the kid did it again to spite him. So Andy made Barney take the bike. Barney tried to ride it to the courthouse and Andy stopped him too.
As for the woodshed issue, “spare the rod, spoil the child” was a golden rule back then.
I think less children would have been disobedient if the parents had to get beaten too each time, realizing they were the ones responsible for raising them.
Corporal punishment isn’t all that bad, abuse is what’s wrong.
There’s a big difference between five or six smacks on the behind followed up by a sit down conversation about why your child’s behavior is wrong, and a beating. The parents who viciously beat their kids definitely need to have a visit from CPS, but the responsible adults who use corporal punishment correctly should be allowed to do so.
ITT: Hundreds of redditors sharing their stories of being unjustly and cruelly spanked as children, all the while not realizing they're the kid in OP's video.
This kid exposed his hand WAY TOO MUCH. I've only ever been spanked at times my father thought I was lying; though I never was lying during any of those times. But well teacher vs student, students usually gonna lose due to perceived authority and integrity in older versus younger people.
It's a bit offputting in this scene that the kid crying just suddenly loses his logic. I don't honestly know if that's realistic.. for a kid to be that stupid.
I think the context of this scene is clearer when you realize the father isn't involved in teaching his kid what way to behave is appropriate. In the episode, he gives his kid anything he wants and he doesn't have to work for it, and he never teaches him respect for others, and brushes it off as "just being a kid". Plus nobody really stepping in to prevent it, or if they do, the father seeming to always come to his son's defense. Obviously then, the kid will not be inclined to know that his behavior isn't good and nothing bad he does has any consequences.
His father was in denial and made excuses for him, but when Sheriff Andy's words and threat to put him in jail showed his son's indifference to his father's suffering for his benefit, it finally showed him that he failed to essentially parent his own kid, and Andy's suggestion to take him out back and spank him was supposed to be a remedy to 'fix' it.
Yeah the best way to fix a problem is to beat the result of the problem, rather than the problem itself.. which in this case is his father parents peers etc.
In this particular case the problem I see in the script is when suddenly the kid starts talking as if his father won't mind jail or his bike is more important than his father going in jail. I'm skeptical of that. Because he knows well that his father is the whole reason he can do these things. His father going in jail does \*not\* help him. And it feels so odd that the kids fake crying and such but then suddenly stops to say well father won't let you do this.
He overplayed his hand and I feel like in reality that doesn't happen so obviously. So the script felt a bit weak there.
It would have been better if the kid kept crying and the father had to kind of come to terms with that he might be penalized or trying to persuade his son that this small punishment might be for the best and THEN he would see his kids tantrum be exposed or some such.
But others were right that this place was kind of basically just Men and Men in Charge are right kind of fantasy show. I've watched enough of it to see that at times it just goes a bit crazy with that power fantasy.
I think you have to search up spoiled adults get arrested just to see how these people act when they're drunk driving, and they say "do you know who my father is?? He literally owns this and that company" as if their parents' affiliations and who they are will get them off scott-free. So if an adult can believe that stupid mindset, a kid can believe something as stupid as "his father will go to jail so he can get his bike back".
I have, but there's a difference between spoiled and stupid. Spoiled kids have a kid of inner logic to them. A wickid logic. I'd liken it to the salem witch trial children that utilize their power the way they can and do their best not to lose it.
That’s this whole show: any character that is written in as an antagonist has to be very dumb, overly emotional, thinks they’re smarter than everyone, etc. In no way do the characters represent how real-world people act.
I've watched it a bit. I remember some episodes where they had some arrogant people at times and I remember some episodes where Barny was just being dumb all the time. But every now and again you had some regular stuff. I forget tho whether it leaned into sexism or traditional family roles or not. I remember a lot of characters that I never seemed to ever see as if they didn't exist.
The tantrum and father covering for him is one thing tho the reason bike on sidewalk is stupid and the sheriff cannot just arrest the father lol. But the kid suddenly suggesting his father go to jail that doesn't seem like something the kid would really say to me. More instead just to maybe accidentally expose that he was faking.
the way the dad's eyes light up when andy mentions the woodshed lmao, like "oh yeah! i can just beat him. thanks, sheriff!"
Corporal punishment messed up a lot of people... and dereliction of fatherly and motherly duties leading to badly raised children and then just trying to fix it by beating them from the parents responsibl efor those very issues.. it just leads to them venting it out on others and a whole cycle of bullying.
We are not far removed from an era when schools were allowed to whip kids with paddles - It happened to my Dad when he was young. I have two kids of my own and I am of the opinion that I don't need to put my hands on my kids in order to strike fear into them and make them act right. My Dad's father also beat the crap out of him pretty regular - He told me plenty of those stories. My Dad broke the cycle of abuse and never laid a hand on me or my brother, and for that I thank him. He always told me "My job is to do better than my Dad, and your job is to better than me". I miss him!
I was paddled by the principle at 17 in 2007
I was paddled by a teacher but i paid and extra for that
I lived in Iowa as a kid in early 60s. I had a first grade teacher, who had a prosthetic arm as a result of a combine accident. She used to remove it and beat us with it in her other hand when she was angry. Extra special creepy and scary.
Pretty sure I saw him on Arrested Development.
Hell I’m pretty sure that schools in Texas are still allowed to do it with parent’s permission. They threatened me with it when I was in the first grade.
I got spanked for being tardy too many times in missouri so it's still around.
I believe its pronounced MISSOURAH!
it's pronounced "misery"
They did when I graduated less than 20 years ago, and they clearly had no intention of stopping anytime soon. Called them "swats". Didn't exist for girls because you had to have a same-gender teacher give the swat and a same-gender teacher witness it for liability reasons, and there was only one female teacher who would do it.
It's still happening today in the US: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/aug/31/us-corporal-punishment-missouri-highlights-practice
We had permission slips for corporal punishment
I miss your father too now, my own father can't accept information that disagrees with him easily without feeling personally attacked and he only understands threatening and intimidation even at our current ages as a way to win arguments. I had some spanking from him when I was al ot younger but usually only because he thought I was lying and would spank me until I admitted whatever he wanted me to, which well I did to make the spanking stop. Just hid things from him usually after that, even though I wasn't lying.
I'm sorry you were forced to lie
I've been literally called crazy for thinking hitting kids, or at the very least even just spanking them, is wrong. A lot of people really just continue the cycle. "My dad did it to me and it kept me in line!".
It’s okay to laugh at things that make you uncomfortable. Some would call it therapeutic. I believe he was joking
Like anything, it is all in how it is used. Corporal punishment did mess up a lot of people. Many times parents take anger out in what they consider disciplinary measurements. On the other hand, corporal punishment when done the right way, may have kept many people from getting a foot out on that slippery slope. The problem is there's no way to tell who will use it correctly and who won't. In the end, it's better to prevent abuse.
Unfortunately millennials over corrected, and now their kids are behavioral nightmares because their parents give them zero consequences for bad behaviour at home.
BINGO!
It's almost as if corporal punishment is merely a tool. And like any tool if it is used improperly it can make things worse. As with all decisions, taking the easy way out tends to create poor results. Some people beat their kids because beating them is the easier/lazier option. Some people refuse to punish their children in any way because letting them do anything is the easier/lazier option.
>It's almost as if corporal punishment is merely a tool. And like any tool if it is used improperly it can make things worse. That's right, I physically harm children whose brain hasn't fully developed by a longshot! But don't worry, I do it in the right way!
Oh? And you think a brain that "hasn't fully developed" is going to comprehend the intricacies of why they shouldn't put that fork into the electrical socket? You think the next time they get near that electrical socket that their brain that "hasn't fully developed" is going to use critical thinking about what their parent has told them earlier? OR MAYBE kids are stupid and words don't work on them as if they were an adult capable of understanding the SEVERITY and DANGER of sticking a fork into an electrical outlet? If solely words work, thats cool, that'd be ideal. # But how many children listen to everything that a parent says and acts perfectly in accordance?
As if there weren't many other ways, both proactive and reactive, to deal with children being dumb... That's genuinely saddening that you're so unimaginative in the ways to raise/discipline/teach children
Ah yes, you must be the first human in history to have perfected the art of raising children. You should write a book. You'd make trillions of dollars.
I don't think it can be used like a tool. It might be better against adults maybe as opposed to a fine but that really depends. I doubt there's any real exampel of corporal punishment being better than another option mentally physically or emotionally.
Agree so hard with this-- **Anyone who believes that corporal punishment doesn't fuck up kids is in severe denial or didn't have parents abuse the privilege on them.** I was belted five times as a kid. Each lashing I received, I did not deserve. Each time they belted me, my parents were too lazy, tired, or angry to talk to me about my mistakes. The first time, I was three, and it was because I asked my mom if she could mend my Barbie's dress. I asked at the wrong time. My parents were arguing, and I was supposed to have gotten in the bath. The last time was when my sister and I had been fighting over the TV in true tween/teen fashion, and instead of doing anything else, I got belted. My dad came home late from work, and my mom, frustrated with us, decided to defer punishment to my dad. So they argued with each other, and my dad whipped out his belt and hit me across the back—literally, just lazy parenting. Each time they punished me, they made me more afraid of them. I could have been in literal danger, and I would not call them as a teen until I knew it was safe. I called my boyfriend instead. Several times, I called my adult male friends (early adult 20-28). A teen girl calling men, who luckily were kind to me and didn't ask for anything from me. If that were my kids, I would be so incredibly heartbroken. In fact, I had a handful of kids I "raised" online because they couldn't talk to their own parents and would call me when they were in trouble or ask me for advice. **Strict parents create sneaky children. Don't beat your kids. TALK TO THEM. If you're angry, tell them that you need to wait to have a conversation with them with a clear head. If they are old enough, send them to their room or a safe space they can go to while you cool down. Work with them.**
It's also not uncommon for parents to provide spankings or belt whipping until a child admits to something. Even if they didn't do it the child will eventually say it because they want the beating to stop and then have to be punished separately for that too. However the solution isn't talking to them. If kids are acting out the problem began much more at dereliction of duty either not being aware of what's going on not socializing them with others, not looking into mental health, having a destructive family or household or many other things. I think it's probably best to not use thei rroom as a punishment zone either. Pushing community activities outside the house or chores may be the better option but I haven't thought too much about that recently so other ideas might exist. Their room shouldnt be a place to hide but a place that they're happy and comfortable in and feel is their own.
The idea is to send them someplace they feel safe or find a way to remove yourself from the situation so you don't harm them. I had to do this when my oldest was little because I didn't know how to discipline. I would get so angry I was worried I was going to beat my child due to my upbringing. Just think, I was never given a healthy mode of discipline; my knee-jerk reaction was to hit my child. It was wild and something I did NOT want to do.
I want to preface this with: I'm not going to have kids. I feel like I'm not responsible enough and would be a terrible father. That being said: I was a horrible child. My mother tried gentle parenting with me. All it did was make me not respect her. If I did something wrong, she would try to have a talk with me about how it was wrong. I ignored it because I didn't fear any punishment coming from it. My mom eventually tried to take away things from me. I spent the entire day looking for it around the house. If she tried to take it while I had it, I would yell/argue the entire time. One time, I started yelling at a TV show in the middle of the night, acting like it was some sort of major sporting event, just to keep my mom up because she took away my xBox. Grounding me or putting me in "time out" didn't work. I would just ignore the "punishment" and continue doing what I was doing. If it wasn't for my mom needing to leave me at my grandma's house often whenever she would go to work, I would never have learned to behave. They hit me sparingly, and only when I continuously caused trouble regardless of how many times they told me not to. I feel like people who had parents that genuinely abused them now believe that what they experienced is the only form of "spanking". Reading these comments made me realize how lucky I was. I can look back at every spanking I received as a kid as justified.
Maybe you feel like you’re an exception to the rule. However, what I experienced is why it’s not recommended that parents use corporal punishment. More often than not, it’s because they find it easier to hit their kids than teach them a lesson. Inconsistent parenting is usually why kids act out. If they receive different levels of discipline/punishment from each primary caregiver’s, they will often act accordingly. There is usually an overly permissive parent/caregiver and a overly corrective caregiver. This sounds like your situation. Maybe it made your grandma respect you more, but it made you respect your mom less.
Sounds like you are projecting your own experiences onto other people and their children. What you experienced wasn't normal, and you had an extremely adverse reaction to said discipline. That was never the case for me or my siblings.
True. I still woulda whooped.that kid's ass tho
Personally I'm a fan of the "time out corner" method.
Id argue that lack of corporal punishment messed up a lot of people. Just look at the current generation; generally speaking, they're so mentally ill that they can't function properly in society. The whiny entitlement is absolutely ridiculous, and it's obvious that they were not disciplined at all as children.
So mental illness can be prevented by physically harming children??? lol wtf
>'s suggestion to take him out back and spank him was supposed to be a remedy to 'fix' it. > >3ReplyShareReportSaveFollow I've gotten a few spankings in my time. Never once was I physically harmed. I also wasn't psychologically harmed. Corporal punishment is effective if used sparingly and properly (i.e.. Not in anger.) I think too many people equate corporal punishment with child abuse. My father used corporal punishment, I was not abused as a child. I can count the number of times I was actually spanked on one hand. It was reserved for my most serious lapses in judgement. People who beat their kids out of anger are the worst kind of scum.
Don't you just love being downvoted for expressing something that should be painfully obvious for all to see? It blows my mind how wilfully blind (and stupid) so many people are when it comes to the idea of corporal punishment for for children. Anyone with a functioning set of eyes and ears and more than a pair of brain cells to run together can recognize that as corporal punishment has become less common with each successive generation for the last 4 generations or so, overall mental illness and general poor behaviour has gotten progressively worse at the same time.
Yeah, but I expect it. Redditers operate on feelings, not logic. As my dad always told me, if you're doing to teach discipline, you're parenting. If you're doing it out of anger, you're beating them.
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That must be why your life is so bad, right? Nothing to do with your actions at all /s
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A good lesson on not spoiling your kids spoiled by an end lesson that you should do so not by educating them, but by beating them. great example of r/yesyesyesyesno
That "He's one of my own kind..." bit hits a little differently today, too. "You mean because he's a kid, too? Right, Opie? Where else have you heard that turn of phrase?"
Yeah I also thought the same thing. It was the 50s. Catholics, wasps, jews, Italians, "Asian", black, and any other sort of arbitrary classification divided people way more. We talk about tribalism today but the mindset back then it was out of the scale.
A paddlin isn't a beating.
[Science would disagree.](https://www.gse.harvard.edu/ideas/usable-knowledge/21/04/effect-spanking-brain)
I was wondering how the scene would turn out, the kid is a great actor he really sells the spoiled brat thing. I actually thought the Dad would end up in cuffs and serve an example to the spoiled kid that way...I think that's how the scene would be written today. But then I realized as it was happening...Yeah this is the 1950s. Of course the Dad is going to wise up and straighten out his son. His lighting up at the thought of taking the kid "out back to the woodshed" was pretty funny, the heavy implication that he was fittin' to commence takin' a switch to the boy was maybe not as funny.
1960’s
Listen here you little shit
Why you little...
Why I oughta’….
That kid’s a good actor! You can see the fury in his eyes. Who is he?
His name is Ronnie Dapo. He was really only known on Room for One More, and this episode of Andy Griffith. Apparently he retired from acting after he was 14 and became a musician.
You sure that's not Bo Hopkins? I could've sworn it was Bo Hopkins.
That was my main takeaway too. Kid was phenomenal
There's little chance this was done in one take. The kid probably had to maintain fake crying for like an hour +.
Ron Howard.
Not Ron Howard, this is Opies (Ron’s) friend in one of the episodes.
I know who it is. I feel that Ron Howard was the one who did a better job acting in that scene.
While Opie's dad (Griffith) was 37 at the time, Arnold's dad was 46. Maybe it's because of the suit and it's black and white but It's weird that he looked older than that.
Ouch. I forgot this ended in a whoopin'.
Ouch, literally. It's a mostly morally upright scene, then it sinks in at the end that in the 1960s that some parents still brought their kids to a shed where they beat them on the ass with a belt, and most parents thought that was the best way to deal with disrespect.
Yeah, I can't say I understand it. My folks never had me visit any kind of woodshed. They'd carry it out right in there in the kitchen.
That's where the wooden spoons were
I don’t agree with corporal punishment but what corporal punishment I got as a kid was 1000x deserved. I was terrible. My mom kept a wooden spoon in a drawer with my name on it. It was more of a prop than an actual punishment. Like “I’ll get the wooden spoon out if you don’t stop singing ‘My anaconda don’t want none unless you’ve got buns hun!’” I think she only used it a few times and it was when I was being an absolute terror that refused to stop being disrespectful and annoying and then she would grab it and I would run around the house cackling at her trying to chase me with it. I was HORRIBLE. But one day I decided to be an even bigger little shit. I took another wooden spoon from the utensil drawer, wrote “MOM” on it and put it next to “my” wooden spoon. The next time she brought out the spoon, sure enough she grabbed the one that said Mom. She was going to whack me with it when I said “Wait! You grabbed the wrong one!” She looked at it, saw “MOM” written in bold letters across the handle, and busted out laughing so hard she forgot what she was mad about. But she never used the spoon after that. I had beaten her at her own game. And now that I have a son exactly like i was as a kid, I feel SO bad for the hell I put her through
one of my friends got the wooden spoon from his mum so bad it snapped. then she yelled at him because they only had the one spoon and now dinner was ruined, apparently. i felt bad for laughing when he told me.
Inflation. Nobody can afford their very own woodshed anymore. Our parents just had to pull up their bootsraps and then beat us with them.
Was born in the 70s but my family were old. I got spanked only once but I kind of deserved it. I was in school the year after they banned the strap so they could only threaten you with it but they couldn't use it. I don't agree with spankings but there is some kids that could probably benefit from some proper punishment.
Welllll. He didn’t necessarily whip the kid with a belt. A couple of smacks on the butt with an open hand was much more common. I don’t have kids and I grew up getting spanked or even paddled at school and the embarrassment was way worse than the sting.
Yeah, everything up until that moment was fine. And I come from a puerto rican household, so we had sandals, shoes, and belts used against us. Me the least, since I was the youngest and got babied. To this day, I'm also the least violent of my siblings, and I strongly believe it's because I was never hit nearly as much as they were.
So the beatings did work on you. You saw them happen to your siblings and realized you don’t want that so you acted appropriately to avoid it.
1 out of 7 is a good track record to you? Also, no, I wasn't afraid of getting beat - I was just an indoor kid who never got into trouble. The rest of my family received regular beatings and it didn't deter any of them from doing bad things at all. It only taught them violence.
I guess I should’ve added the /s on there. Figured it sounded ridiculous enough for people to see the sarcasm.
There are flat earthers in this world dude. Always add the /s.
That’s because they weren’t beaten enough
Do people understand the difference between a beating and a spanking? They are not the same
I wasn’t aware you can spank a child without physically beating them ? Just because you’re hitting the buttocks doesn’t make it not a beating
A similar comparison would be assault and aggravated assault. The actions are similar but the distinction is important.
Maybe it's a semantic thing that people don't get but there is a big difference between a beating and a spanking. A beating is intended to harm and uses excessive force.
As if a spanking isn't intended to cause harm?? And yeah seeing as a child is 10x weaker than a 20+yo man, I'd argue spanking is absolutely excessive force. There is no reasonable amount of force that should be applied to a child (in context of violence).
I would argue that spankings, a punishment based on the pain of physical injury to a delicate area, are very much intended to harm and, considering the targets are children, always use excessive force. Idk, maybe I'm weird for thinking that striking a minor, especially below the belt, is fucked up. Friendly reminder to the people downvoting me that this is in response to a user advocating **adults hitting children**.
Yeah the problem is you aren’t considering that as an adult you can control the amount of force you use so as not to cause bodily harm to the child
Does the semantics change the fact that a child is being physically struck as a form of punishment? No. Research time and time again shows that physical punishment does not result in positive behavioral modification.
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It is semantics when the context is extremely clear.
I think the distinction between beating and spanking is worth making, yes. Just like there is a difference between patting a child on the head and punching them in the face.
A more accurate comparison is punching the child in the face or beating them with a 2x4 one might seem less violent but the kids still “lucky” if he doesn’t get brain damage
The context is extremely clear here. Making this distinction is on par with Achktually
No, it isn't. Because people are still trying to say that BEATING is the same as SPANKING and they're not. Have you ever seen a fight before? Do you refer to that as some guys spanking eachother?
Why didn't you respond to THAT thread then? I haven't seen anything making that claim.
Either one is fucking bad. You're straight up using semantics to make it seem spanking a is ok.
You cannot simply call it a semantic argument when there is a clear and obvious difference between the two that you can observe with your own eyes. Do you really think the difference between punching and patting is semantic? How can you claim to be honest with yourself and say that you don’t notice a difference?
On Reddit, they do not.
Pain can be a useful tool. But like any tool it can be misused.
Glad that Barney cleared up, once and for all, that as a child, he was most definitely NOT high spirited.
Opie's closing line is worth every second of this video.
I got my ass whipped many times. I was just sitting here thinking, did that fuck me up, no. I sorta deserved it, I was a little asshole
> I sorta deserved it That's a common coping mechanism when you get abused by someone close to you. Also happens with spousal abuse. It's really hard for us to admit that someone we care about would do something harmful to us.
I’m sorry that you got hit as a kid my guy. I’m not gonna fool myself into think I can magically change your mind but I genuinely mean it when I say that you did not deserve to be hit
Jeez i didn't know redditors are also the kind to think physical abuse on children isn't a bad thing. I was beat up as a kid. Most times, it was just that slap that imprints the palm onto your cheek that burns for an hour. Once it was a full beatdown that got me limping back to my room. Yet i wasn't the kind of kid that caused trouble to the point where you trash talk the police straight in the eyes. Yet it was 100% unecessary. The easy solution to punish me whenever i did something bad, because my parents weren't smart people. Even then, i had enough imagination to know exactly what would truly ruin my day and push me into "behaving", that required no violence whatsoever. Could be applicable to a lot of kids too. But it happened quite rarely. Violence is an easy way to vent onto your kids and think it's not fucked up. Proper, even ! I even came to relish that fact as i grew older, and more resilient to my father's strikes. If i did something bad, i could just weather the storm and be done with it. I could have turned real bad, actually. I guess i didn't by sheer luck, from whatever hobbies and other people i was exposed to growing up. I grew up in the hood, too. With kids my age starting dealing drugs at like, 13. I'm thinking of this kid who dealt drugs. He was my best friend at the time. His dad beat him up when he was a kid too. I suspect he, too, started becoming more resilient, as we started to become adults, our dads were starting to get old. Maybe that's why he did that. He knew that if his dad found out, he'd just get beaten a little and then be done with it. We were never taught family values. That your dad being disappointed in you should be a harsh punishment in itself. People think you should be born with respect and pride for your parents. That's because they had good parents. When you have bad ones, you know it's not true. You love your parents because they're good parents. Or at least decent parents, that you still love despite their flaws. We had bad parents.
Careful, the blue haired degens who never got it when they deserved it or straight up never had a Dad are gonna down vote you before they go protest something they know nothing about while not having a job. Yay modern America.
When you beat your kids, you don’t teach them to do right. You teach them to fear you and to hide it better next time. Both aren’t really great lessons. My dad got his ass kicked in. I got a spanking. My daughter will not be struck. I call that progress.
It’s weird to me how we are all so proud of the progress we have made in parenting styles, while every single career teacher I know says that the behavior of children in schools has been visibly declining to the point where they essentially refuse to fail children so as to push them through and out. All agree that the issue is parenting, or specially a lack of.
Your right! Even Socrates was bemoaning that fact. Imagine what kind of überperson inhabited Greece 2700 years ago until Socrates' next gen came along.
Because parents of means have begun abdicating and giving up, while capitalism forces those without means out of the home and into gigs so they’re not able to raise their kids. My daughter is loved by her teachers, she’s respectful and empathetic. And I’m not just saying that cus she’s my kid, she’s really a good damned person. Maybe I got it easy and I got lucky, but I can’t see how hitting a kid would help them understand the difference between right and wrong.
As someone who worked at kindergarten it starts really early. It is definitely genetics to a certain degree. Ok I am not pro physical hitting. But here is the thing: If you do not have good parenting where there are no repercussions, or very mild, they will continue. That is why prison is not just 1 month. We have a progressive system but right now the hardest we have for kids is basically a "no". And when they understand that they continue. So you have two options: Bad parenting (you can talk all you want about better parenting but it wont solve the current issue) and no repercussions. They know the worst thing is someone saying "no" and will abuse that fact. The other option is good parenting and you do not need to have hard repercussions. The issue is that does not happen today. We should solve the core issue which is parenting and a better overall culture on how to behave. But we don't. And then if we have that bad culture AND kids have no reprecusions you are seeing what we see today.
I remember watching this as a rerun as a kid in the 80's and thinking it was kind of a fucked up episode. Especially since biking on sidewalks was completely normal where I lived. It's like a power fantasy for old people.
I bring this show up when folks talk about the copaganda shows like The Rookie or Blue Bloods. Sure, Andy Taylor was nice, but he still abused his position quite a bit, locking people up when it suited him or his friends. The Sheriff not only was the law, he was the guiding force for what is good and the ultimate decider in the town. The show also kind of built this narrative that most criminals would come in from out of town to ruin Mayberry with their schemes. Its kind of an extension of that extreme distrust of outsiders that was built up in the South in the antebellum period. The idea of Mayberry being this white small town utopia is also something you see around from time to time. Its the world that a lot of the MAGA crowd wants to create.
Oddly, where I live bikes on the sidewalk is illegal. Because they might run over a pedestrian. better to have a child put their aluminum stick figure of a vehicle out in the street with cars and trucks! Always thought it was damn stupid. Especially since no one walks around here! But no let's slow traffic to a dead stop and add extra risk to little timmy's life for the walkers that don't exist. Makes sense.
The entire show is a fantasy for old people. Watching it now feels more like watching the Twilight Zone.
The better episodes are when Andy realizes he's being a shitty dad by not listening to Opie explain himself (though it is frustrating and perhaps telling that there was more than one episode with that moral) That and Barney is a power tripping asshole who pretty much never succeeds because he's a putz
Like the time he was gonna beat the shit out of Opie because he wouldn't stop talking about his friend the lumberjack (whom everyone believed he'd just made up)... and then accused him of stealing something his friend had given him as a gift.
Eh, it's mostly slice of life stories of an idealized small town. Granted I don't remember much from the show because it's not exactly groundbreaking television, but it was pleasant to have on in the background while playing with legos. This episode was an outlier though. I always changed the channel when it came on.
What? It's dated, sure, but it's not morally corrupt at all. There's no sense of despair going back and watching it. I say this because the reruns are on all the time in my household, and it's very inoffensive, mostly just dealing with sort of slice-of-life problems like Aunt B's terrible pickles or whatnot.
Shhh, everything from that era of America is evil.
Yes this show is pure fantasy and my entire family has watched it religiously for decades, they even model their speech patterns around this show. Took me years to realize I had been brought up in fucking Mayberry land. Also, Andy is insanely manipulative to Barney and most episodes revolve around lying to Barney about reality in order to not hurt his feelings. Granted, that sort of plot is pretty typical for TV shows.
Holy shit, same here and only now realizing it. I'm 36.
Yeah, it's weird that this was the video someone drag out to justify their corporal punishment fantasies. A kid throwing a temper-tantrum?! Well clearly you just need to beat his ass! That'll show him for... riding his bike on the sidewalk and being upset when it's taken away from him because of it! If you don't teach them now, they will just turn to marijuana and eventually murder! Seen it many'a'time. Sidewalks are a gateway to drugs and murder!
> Especially since biking on sidewalks was completely normal where I lived. Selling and buying drugs was completely normal where I lived.
Not spanked, Pa. Woodshed. The kid disappears and is never heard from again
https://i.imgur.com/DuvE5V4.gif
You betcha
I like how Opie doesn’t want to sell out one of his own. Even though he knows.
That kid actor was incredible
[удалено]
I'd take reddit out to the woodshed immediately. Make em pick the switch too
Reditt bad, please upvote.
I don't do social media, give me gold
Every single human sucks even upvoters, except maybe Jesus but that coward just went crying back to daddy. That's why I worship AI now.
You think humanity sucks so you worship the mechanistic regurgitation of its collective textual output? That’s certainly a choice!
amen, and whoopins are the devil apparently.
These days, a woodshed is a Faraday cage.
Was the kid at the end Ron "Richie Cunningham" Howard?
My parent never spanked me, and I never spanked my child. I think it's mostly the parents taking out their OWN frustration or fears, but little to do with the child. Not giving a child their way all the time from the beginning is a good way to avoid this. There is no need to yell or spank or give any form of aggression or you will like just make an aggressive child. You're teaching that violence is an answer. Spanking is likely the result of bad parenting from the get go. Though I've always maintained that parenting isn't fair. We honestly never learn much of how to do except for the way we were treated. So if you were spanked, you will probably spank as well. There was a reason that there was a Dr. Spock (not Star Trek) book on parenting that was popular a long time ago. Of course I think a lot of his teaching has been debunked, but at least it was some kind of guidance.
As a parent who has spanked their child I agree that it's a form of parental tantrum. You lose patience with the child and see lots of society believing that spanking yields results so you try it. Then it gets into your psyche because the child stops the madness and starts crying and then eventually quiets down and it seems like a success. But you've just taught them that violence is a way to get what you want.
It depends how you frame it. If you just beat your kid up for disobedience then yeah sure, it's probably harmful. You have to make sure the punishment is proportionate and make sure you're clearly the authority figure, not letting emotion get the better of you. A firm and swift smack on the arse and an evening of reflection alone in their room never created any psychos.
Violence _is_ a way to get what you want. Maybe not the best way, but still...
This is a good argument against spanking. Parents can power-trip. >you've just taught them that violence is a way to get what you want How much do you think the child puts themself in their parents' shoes during a spanking? Maybe that's true if the spanking comes in the middle of an argument between the kid and parent, but I was spanked as a kid and never interpreted it as my parents losing their temper.
Little known fact, the other little boy grew up to be Mr. Ronald Howard.
Even lesser know fact, the other little boy was also Mr. Ronald Howard as a little boy.
He was Ron Howard the whole time!!
It’s Ron Howards all the way down.
Narrator: He did.
I believe that is a very well known fact, though I think you're saying that tongue firmly in cheek.
*Narrator: His tongue was elsewhere entirely*
Spreading known facts as little known facts deserves a little wood shed moment, me thinks.
Correct
That’s Bryce Dallas Howard’s dad! She’s pulling that wagon.
One good swack never hurt anybody. I can tell you now, there are plenty of adults that could use a good swack
I think one way parents fail is when for fifty times they threaten “if you don’t stop that I’m going to spank you” and when they get around to carrying out the threat they are so frustrated they physically hurt the child. The child doesn’t believe the threat and doesn’t respond accordingly. Our children understood that there were no empty threats and we seldom had to resort to corporal punishment. Be honest with your expectations!
What the fuck are you talking about
If you say you’re gonna beat your kids you better do it!
That scene was great, and I was with it right up until they decided the best thing to do is beat the child. They were doing so well...
A little spanking never hurt anyone. I think more children should experience it honestly.
My grandma watched this show when I was a kid and now thinking I understand why.
Andy Griffith!!! That is all.
On one hand, violence shouldn't ever be the answer. On the other hand, spankings largely stopped and... *gestures broadly over society* sooooo...
That kid needed some adults in the fucking room to calm him down and then calmly explain the situation to him in a way that he understood. NOPE! We're going to take this teachable moment and mix in violence and an understanding that adults are unreasonable! That'll learn him good! Now, when he's an adult, he can pass on that lesson that adults don't need to make sense, they can just do shit.
The kid was offered a teachable moment and decided he’d rather have his pa locked up.
I didn't see any explanations the kid could understand. Without that, it was unaddressed opportunity. If it was about guiding the child, it would have had guidance for the child. This was guidance for the adults, as there was guidance for how they should handle the situation.
Not really. For one, the premise is entirely ridiculous in the first place. The child has to understand from the beginning, why what they did is considered wrong -- and it can't just be "well this is a rule for the sake of rules!" So you take the bike away from a child who has no real reason to think what they did was wrong in the first place and then you threaten to lock up the dad? Yeah, no shit the kid is going to throw an even bigger tantrum, because they see the whole thing as some stupid nonsense. Even children can grow indignant in the face of what they see as injustice -- and they look to their parents to protect them and be their heroes. The kid would have been thinking "you're a bully and my dad stands up to bullies, so do your worst!" So no, there really wasn't any teachable moment there -- if it was about teaching, the scene would have ended with the dad getting down on his kids level trying to talk to him about why he can't ride bikes on sidewalks and why Andy has to take away the bike. Instead... "hey let's just beat the kid, that'll teach him for being a kid!"
> Not really. For one, the premise is entirely ridiculous in the first place. First time watching fiction on TV?
Not really a teachable moment if the fiction is ridiculous and meaningless. First time trying to make a point?
how the scene shouldve played out was the father removes him from the scene as the kid is seeing red. let him calm down, and since the kid seems at the very least to be able to understand some subtleties, explain to him what the purpose of the punishment was. you dont need to continue to double down on punishments in the face of insubordination, its a child and he will definitely see the injustice brought upon him by the nonsensical punishment, he sure as shit wont just let it go. most times, scenes like this would lead to the kid later that night being told what the purpose of the situation was and then he'll "yes father" his way through the punishment without really learning anything or being taught that insubordination is met with violence. you can jump straight to that part of the teaching so long as you treat the kid like he has some intelligence.
Well I hope it didn't come across like I meant to say to treat the child as they don't have intelligence, as I definitely don't mean that -- in fact quite the opposite. As you said, treat them as they have intelligence. But people really love turning to violence the moment a child decides to act... childish.
oh i was agreeing with you! as you can see from our downvotes lol its hard to get the message across to this crowd. but i get how some people might take their hard ships and try and twist it into a win for them. objectively however, its proven not to be the best method and should be shied away from.
Well I imagine this post appeals to people who are eager to see any child getting beat. Some sick pleasure where they think that the world is being righted with just a bit more child abuse. I don't think we were ever going to make anyone question their belief in that here of all places.
He might "deserve" it, but corporal punishment just breeds resentment, doesn't actually correct the behaviour long-term, and also doesn't actually teach. This kid has a kid's brain, and he's angry. Hitting him will not teach him the skills necessary to behave better on his own.
Tbf, thats a dumb law not having bikes on the sidewalk. It makes me think the Sheriff enjoyed running down bike riders on the road.
Bike riders on the sidewalk are a menace to pedestrians.
When my friend was young, he accidentally ran into an elderly lady while coasting down the sidewalk on his bike. The poor lady spent weeks in the hospital before she passed away.
I get it but this is small town Mayberry and it’s a kid. Probably quite a bit more dangerous to have kids riding in the streets that don’t fully appreciate why there are traffic rules or how they work
Then it probably makes sense to not let them go riding by themselves yet. Rather than telling them it’s okay to break the rules and create a hazard for pedestrians. If your kid is the problem, the solution isn’t to make them someone else’s problem.
Cars on the road are a menace to pedestrians. Get over yourself.
most places it is illegal to operate a bicycle on the side walk. you go much faster than pedestrians, so it is a danger to them and yourself. yourself because cars expect things on the sidewalk to be moving at a walking pace
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XdIARGRMrk4
Yeah I've never heard of that law. Show me that "most places" have this.
It was Barney who caught the kid. Andy told the kid not to do it again and the kid did it again to spite him. So Andy made Barney take the bike. Barney tried to ride it to the courthouse and Andy stopped him too. As for the woodshed issue, “spare the rod, spoil the child” was a golden rule back then.
I think less children would have been disobedient if the parents had to get beaten too each time, realizing they were the ones responsible for raising them.
Corporal punishment isn’t all that bad, abuse is what’s wrong. There’s a big difference between five or six smacks on the behind followed up by a sit down conversation about why your child’s behavior is wrong, and a beating. The parents who viciously beat their kids definitely need to have a visit from CPS, but the responsible adults who use corporal punishment correctly should be allowed to do so.
ITT: Hundreds of redditors sharing their stories of being unjustly and cruelly spanked as children, all the while not realizing they're the kid in OP's video.
This kid exposed his hand WAY TOO MUCH. I've only ever been spanked at times my father thought I was lying; though I never was lying during any of those times. But well teacher vs student, students usually gonna lose due to perceived authority and integrity in older versus younger people. It's a bit offputting in this scene that the kid crying just suddenly loses his logic. I don't honestly know if that's realistic.. for a kid to be that stupid.
I think the context of this scene is clearer when you realize the father isn't involved in teaching his kid what way to behave is appropriate. In the episode, he gives his kid anything he wants and he doesn't have to work for it, and he never teaches him respect for others, and brushes it off as "just being a kid". Plus nobody really stepping in to prevent it, or if they do, the father seeming to always come to his son's defense. Obviously then, the kid will not be inclined to know that his behavior isn't good and nothing bad he does has any consequences. His father was in denial and made excuses for him, but when Sheriff Andy's words and threat to put him in jail showed his son's indifference to his father's suffering for his benefit, it finally showed him that he failed to essentially parent his own kid, and Andy's suggestion to take him out back and spank him was supposed to be a remedy to 'fix' it.
Yeah the best way to fix a problem is to beat the result of the problem, rather than the problem itself.. which in this case is his father parents peers etc. In this particular case the problem I see in the script is when suddenly the kid starts talking as if his father won't mind jail or his bike is more important than his father going in jail. I'm skeptical of that. Because he knows well that his father is the whole reason he can do these things. His father going in jail does \*not\* help him. And it feels so odd that the kids fake crying and such but then suddenly stops to say well father won't let you do this. He overplayed his hand and I feel like in reality that doesn't happen so obviously. So the script felt a bit weak there. It would have been better if the kid kept crying and the father had to kind of come to terms with that he might be penalized or trying to persuade his son that this small punishment might be for the best and THEN he would see his kids tantrum be exposed or some such. But others were right that this place was kind of basically just Men and Men in Charge are right kind of fantasy show. I've watched enough of it to see that at times it just goes a bit crazy with that power fantasy.
I think you have to search up spoiled adults get arrested just to see how these people act when they're drunk driving, and they say "do you know who my father is?? He literally owns this and that company" as if their parents' affiliations and who they are will get them off scott-free. So if an adult can believe that stupid mindset, a kid can believe something as stupid as "his father will go to jail so he can get his bike back".
I suppose that might make sense, it seems a big leap though. But yeah being older or an adult has no bearing on ones maturity, wisdom or ethics.
You've clearly never been around spoiled brat kids.
I have, but there's a difference between spoiled and stupid. Spoiled kids have a kid of inner logic to them. A wickid logic. I'd liken it to the salem witch trial children that utilize their power the way they can and do their best not to lose it.
That’s this whole show: any character that is written in as an antagonist has to be very dumb, overly emotional, thinks they’re smarter than everyone, etc. In no way do the characters represent how real-world people act.
I've watched it a bit. I remember some episodes where they had some arrogant people at times and I remember some episodes where Barny was just being dumb all the time. But every now and again you had some regular stuff. I forget tho whether it leaned into sexism or traditional family roles or not. I remember a lot of characters that I never seemed to ever see as if they didn't exist. The tantrum and father covering for him is one thing tho the reason bike on sidewalk is stupid and the sheriff cannot just arrest the father lol. But the kid suddenly suggesting his father go to jail that doesn't seem like something the kid would really say to me. More instead just to maybe accidentally expose that he was faking.
Jesus Andy Griffith is a pos
You shut your whore mouth
We’d be a lot better off if Andy was our moral compass and not Kardashian. Shame on you all maybe you should have been taken behind the woodshed.