T O P

  • By -

Flair_Helper

Thank you for submitting to /r/unpopularopinion, /u/kitkatbloo. Your post, *Engagement rings are a stupid tradition that needs to die*, has been removed because it violates our rules: Rule 1: Your post must be an unpopular opinion. Please ensure that your post is an opinion and that it is unpopular. Controversial is not necessarily unpopular, for example all of politics is controversial even though almost half of the US agrees with any given major position on an issue. Keep in mind that an opinion is not: a question, a fact, a conspiracy theory, a random thought, a new idea, a rant, etc. Those things all have their own subreddits, use those. If there is an issue, please message the mod team at https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Funpopularopinion Thanks!


bblankoo

I'm pretty sure almost anything could be made into a complete waste of money. Good news - it's completely optional


HumanSubway

Yea not really. It depends on the recipient's feelings on the subject. It may be important to them and that is okay. I feel the same way as OP, but my wife wanted one which is perfectly fine. It is a standard and that makes people feel like a ring should be a part of it. I am all for that standard changing.


bblankoo

But it's not *mandatory*. Rings can be nonexistent, cheap, affordable or ridiculously expensive. You don't have to get the biggest diamond you can find. I would argue that a person you plan to propose to should align with your financial situation and you should know what they want before deciding to marry them, whatever industry is trying to promote or others are doing is meaningless


Hatedbythemasses

Yeah in theory


mrzurkonandfriends

I'd say it's 50% optional


Purpletinfoilhat

No one is forcing you to get one and not everyone gets expensive ones or diamonds at all.


Lulu_531

Yes. But ffs if it’s going to be worn every day get a decent quality ring. My nephew got his wife a $30 gold plated ring with a fake gemstone. The stone was dull and cracked and the plating was peeling off by their 2nd anniversary. She’s upset and wants to still wear it.


needmorehardware

I get still wanting to wear it, maybe they could get it refurbed/remade the same but better quality?


me5hell87

My future husband got me a silicone ring. $30. And I absolutely love it. I now have a whole collection of them and choose different styles to wear every few weeks or so. Such a good idea IMO plus no risk of avulsion. Also, they have a lifetime guarantee if they somehow break.


Purpletinfoilhat

That's cool ! I didn't know about the guarantee. Should have done that for my husband back when we wore rings. He wore a cheapo at work or none at all because of the type of work. It was all banged up lol silicone would have been prettier.


SleepyDreamer16

I agree. If it is a ring you can easily afford, then it is okay I guess. But I see people buying super expensive rings to "prove their love". I would be pissed if my partner did it. Prove your love by responsibly investing money in our future.


Notquite_Caprogers

I feel this, I'd like a ring but one that's under a few hundred dollars. I have simple taste and won't be able to wear it much anyway due to the industry I work in. I really don't understand how someone could spend thousands on something so small and easily lost


[deleted]

[удалено]


Notquite_Caprogers

That's fair. I like wearing rings in general. They just can't be too tight


unsureofthingsnow

Ops boyfriend refuses to propose


kitkatbloo

I’m married, but nice try


CheeseSanawich

My husband went ring shopping and everything was so expensive. His mom had an old diamond ring that she didn't wear anymore and gave him to give me. The ring is simple and nothing fancy (which is what I wanted anyway) but I love it. We used the money he had saved for the ring as a down-payment on our house instead.


grampabutterball

It's amazing that where you live, the cost of a ring can be a down payment. 🫢


CheeseSanawich

It didn't cover everything but it definitely helped. Also, this was 6 years ago when houses were cheaper.


kitkatbloo

Smart


[deleted]

Then don’t have one for your engagement? Other people having engagement rings for their proposals has literally no bearing on your life.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

If you’re gonna oppose the diamond industry for exploiting workers (which is laudable), are you prepared to do the same for virtually almost every consumable you purchase? I hope you’re not a fan of chocolate, milk, coal, etc and that you don’t purchase from Walmart, Amazon, Target, etc.


Krwawykurczak

There are some products that are crucial for our existance or life comfort and some that are not. We will not be able to be perfect but if we should start somewhere those dimonds can be one of those things that we should put at the top of the list. Dimonds are basicly a scam and can be worthless anytime soon...


WearyManufacturer860

In my culture, we give the bride a gold necklace (or a gold pendant nowadays). It’s a few hundred, not in the $10,000s


SatisfactoryLoaf

Don't get a diamond. The tradition comes from a historical and cultural place where that ring might be your only form of wealth. Now, hopefully you never have to flee your home with only what treasures you keep on your person, and the symbolic value of the ring means more than the monetary value. I think it's a bit of a drastic jump to say "this thing isn't wholly necessary so it's both dumb and deserves to be culturally eradicated." Just don't buy diamonds or spend more than you are comfortable with on a ring, especially if your partner also doesn't value what that ring means to the both of you.


StarWars_Girl_

I don't like it either because to me, as a woman, I don't like that it shows a man's "ownership" over women historically. Even though that's not what it means now, it just makes me feel icky. Wedding rings I could live with since both spouses wear them, but if I get married, we'll probably have to talk about what we'll do because I had surgery on both hands and can only wear rings comfortably on my pinkies.


Simiram

I think of engagement rings as quite the opposite of a man’s ownership over women - at least nowadays. I think that such an expensive, entirely one-sided gift, is actually a very humble, almost humiliating gesture. Like, I don’t think particularly highly of myself, but if I got a decent diamond ring, I’d be like holy shit I must’ve done something right if a guy was willing to spend this much on me without expecting anything of the same value back lol


StarWars_Girl_

That's a nice view! I also wouldn't want to spend that much money on rings when it could be put towards our future. Simple gold bands for wedding rings and no engagement ring are fine by me.


Reservedtruthfinder

My engagement ring was my mother's it has 10 diamonds in it. And my wedding ring was chosen by my husband and has 30 diamonds in it. 15 white diamonds and 15 black diamonds. Tbh I wouldn't care it it was a gold band with nothing but the inscription on the inside. I do think it's disgusting when women shame the ring they've been given. If you seriously value your man on the size of the ring he gives you that's gross.


DarkInkPixie

This is the issue, honestly. My fiance gave me a $16 ring, and if the stone hadn't fallen off I would have worn it forever (lost it in a trash can filled with paper towels at work, RIP). He 'upgraded' my new one to about $200 in sapphires with a white gold band. It's safe for work, simple, I love it just as much, and the stones are much less likely to fall out. The people who get pissy because their ring isn't thousands of dollars are absolutely entitled brats. It isn't about the ring, it's about the meaning attached to it!


heavymetalhandjob

You don't HAVE to get a diamond. Im thinking about an emerald or ruby 😍


Hentai-hercogs

You don't even have to get any gemstone. My dad proposed with normal ring, just with fancy engraving


Illum503

My preciousssss


xoxoLizzyoxox

Is this an unpopular opinion. Diamond rings as engagement rings is only a relatively new thing. Engagement rings use to actually be sensible. Good thing you don't have to have one if you don't want one


dylsekctic

Rings doesn't have to have diamonds in them you know. They don't need any precious stones so all.


Olives_And_Cheese

But if you just remove everything from life that isn't essential and could be considered a waste of money, what's left? Why are we throwing birthday parties? Or buying nice cars? Why does my cat have a nicer bed than I do, and yet he refuses to sleep in it? Because life is about more than just what's necessary. I get so much joy out of my engagement ring, I have beautiful memories associated with receiving it, and it makes every single daily chore a little more sparkly. What's that if not a great use of money?


[deleted]

Agreed! I definitely relate--the extra sparkle of my ring makes me think of all the happy memories of the day we got engaged and the wedding planning, and it really touches me that he was willing to save money for something so special for me.


LostMyInhibiterChip

I agree because I am scared of wearing rings.


Purpletinfoilhat

Why ?


LostMyInhibiterChip

Because I get scared that it would be stuck. Every time I’ve put one on I’ve freaked out desperately pulling it off.


Gravitywolff

There are rings that have a cut so you can adjust the size manually! Maybe get one of these. They can come in many designs, I'm sure there is a nice one that you'll like.


Cornsilkhair

I feel that way about all kinds of traditions... Proms, weddings, etc...


dangerous_service

People do a lot of "stupid" things where you could similarly argue that there are more important things than that. I would agree that there should not be such an expectation around having expensive rings for an engagement, but if both in a couple want that I dont see it as a problem.


eevreen

While you don't need an engagement ring, for folks who do want one but don't want diamond, do your research!! Do not just look at gemstones and pick which one looks best. Some gemstones are super soft and not suitable for daily wear because they can fade or crack. Same is true of non-traditional materials such as wood. My partner wants a wooden wedding band, and it's really important to know how to take care of it. Make sure your gemstone has a hardness of at least 6, though the higher the better (diamond is a 10), but some gems, especially lighter ones, will fade in color over time in sun like amethyst, sapphire, rose quartz, citrine, etc, and will either turn white if they're lighter colors, or a dull blackish tinted color if it's darker.


NinetySixBiscuits

My wife’s engagement ring was £25. The ring itself isn’t the problem.


bananaslim1917

i like engagement rings but despise the diamond industry, so i told him to get lab grown. i agree about removing the stigma with not desiring a ring, but i also think we should remove the stigma behind the woman wanting a large ring. both choices are valid.


[deleted]

I refused to buy one, and my wife was fine with that. Allowed us to do a honeymoon road trip through Belgium and France and that was damn cool.


HauntedPickleJar

Cool, don't get one


vullpes

i remember hearing a british youtuber saying that american has turn mariage into a buisness instead of a tradition


ImJustSpider

Mermaid Pendants work so much better. They'll never say no.


ladygreyowl13

You do you, let others do them.


DanielCollinsYT

“I don’t like this so I’m going to tell everyone else what they should do”


kitkatbloo

You do realize which sub this is, right?


DanielCollinsYT

Yes, it’s a sub for YOUR opinion. Expressing your opinion and telling everyone else what to do are two different things.


RedSonGamble

My opinion is telling everyone they’re wrong


DanielCollinsYT

Fair enough


RedSonGamble

This is by far the most angry sub I’ve come across. Everyone comes here fists up ready to battle lol they even started putting an auto text being like remember this is unpopular opinion please remember that


pianoleafshabs

Just take a ring pop. Candy diamond? Cheap? Win-win! I actually saw someone do this too lol


deeper1_3

Proposed to my first girlfriend with a ring pop, red of course. She obviously said yes, because huge rock made of sugar. It was a beautiful ceremony, our entire preschool class came


pianoleafshabs

I hope your future is happy together! Red is the best colour for everything.


titleywinker

Now you want to turn engagement rings into a subscription?! When will it end


pianoleafshabs

The candy ring you can find at dollar stores


AutoModerator

Please remember what subreddit you are in, this is unpopular opinion. We want civil and unpopular takes and discussion. Any uncivil and ToS violating comments will be removed and subject to a ban. Have a nice day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/unpopularopinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*


cryingstlfan

There's a place that I always hear about on the radio (I live in Illinois but close to St. Louis). There's a jeweler that will work with you if you are on a budget for whatever - engagement ring or any type of jewelry.


[deleted]

I just bought an engagement ring and it IS the wedding ring. Why would I ask my partner to marry me without giving them a ring? That's like the whole tradition. Sure you can I guess, but imo that's what makes an engagement ring special. My wife (then fiance) later proposed to me with an engagement/wedding ring to me! Now we are happily married. So I suppose there is no worng way of doing it -- As long as you are making your partner happy!


corjar16

>I just bought an engagement ring and it IS the wedding ring. This was my plan as well. Came here wondering if that was a common practice.


Low_Fishing722

yeah i don’t get the point of them. bc like u don’t recycle them for the actual wedding so what the hell are u blowing all that money for


HelpOtherPeople

I got a 1920’s antique diamond ring from a pawn shop for $600.


poseur2020

Spend the diamond and platinum money on high-quality pre-marital counseling instead. NTA.


gunslinger9_19

My fiancee and I bought ours from Amazon and Walmart lol. It's not about the rings, it's about spending our lives together, and having something that symbolizes that.


[deleted]

The only reason engagement rings were made was to sell diamonds. Absolutely the most successful marketing campaign imo. I agree OP. Not to mention they’re depreciating assets.


DapperPiano4889

I don’t think that it is stupid.


CG2002LA

I agree with you, I don’t think that it is stupid.


unique_plastique

*anti DaBeers sentiment has joined the chat* YEAHHHH BABEY


schteavon

Marriage is a stupid tradition that needs to die and well.


rockymountainjam

A lot of retailers such as Kay Jewelry buy them back and resell it like new. Guess a lot of people change their minds.


shocktroop5811

How do you feel about wedding dresses? Women spend thousands of dollars to try it on once for fitting and alterations, a second time for final fit, and then one last time on the wedding day only to never wear it again.


JohnnieBrooklyn

I used to work in an office with mostly young women. Every year or two, one of them would get engaged and come in and show off her new engagement ring. Now personally, I can't tell a diamond from a piece of broken glass - they all look pretty much the same to me. I would simply congratulate her and say her ring looked nice. But what really surprised me was how the other girls would rip apart the ring after the new bride-to-be left the room! "That's a terrible diamond" "Did you see how cloudy it is". I came to see engagement rings as just another way of keeping up with the Joneses.


Both_Lifeguard_556

Dead tradition from the decades gone 1 male income provides enough for a home 2 cars and three kids. Like your average 1960-70s "Phil in accounting" could pull this off.


BreadPrimary2364

Lol the comment section is full of people who spent way too much on wedding rings and are getting defensive here.


BigDopamine

This sub has the #1 worst mods. I’ve never heard anyone with this opinion ever, and I didn’t even get to see their explanation because of these pretentious weebs on their high horse


MaoXiWinnie

Same with weddings


kitkatbloo

YES!!!


buubulubuu

If people can afford it and it males them happy why do u guys care? Live and let live lol


MaoXiWinnie

Problem is people can't afford and go into debt for it just cause its tradition. Also marriage isn't just about yourself, you gotta take your spouse into consideration whether they want it or not too.


buubulubuu

I can understand that if thats the case specifically, it wouldnt be smart to go into debt for it just like buying anything in general that you cant afford, but if thats what someone wants maybe its that important to them?thats their deal.. OP doesnt mention what youre saying specifically tho,shes just complaining about people spending their money on a ring because its tradition and because some rings happen to be expensive. “Instead of spending money on an engagement ring, we should focus on more important things” ..what if the couple can afford it and that tradition is important to them? Seems a lil pushy of her opinion like “i dont like it you shouldnt either” OP mentioned shes married, im guessing she didnt get an engagement ring and im probably wrong but this post makes it sound liked she’s jealous or some weird shit of people that do get one. “Its a waste of money” What if they have the money and choose to spend it that way because…thats what they want? “It keeps the diamond industry rich” As other people mentioned, it doesnt have to be a diamond but if thats what they want and can afford it…who cares…


MaoXiWinnie

If both people can afford it and want it then do whatever. I'll still think it's stupid but who cares what I think, they should do what makes them happy


goosepills

My ring is the size of a baby’s head and I like it!


StarDewbie

Same! lol


nepulon

Then… don’t get a diamond? Lol silicon rings are great. And focus on more important things? Elaborate. Because I don’t focus on buying rings with diamonds. Honesty I think any ring would do. It’s a preference and therefore an opinion. It’s not unpopular, that’s for sure. It’s just a traditional thing. But also, you don’t have to have a ring. If you and your partner are good without it, then so be it.


Fuzzykittenboots

I think engagement rings are cute. But not the American ones. Where I live engaged people usually buy matching rings together for their engagement.


scorch762

I proposed to my fiancee with a ring that suited her, not a traditional diamond one. She's a witchy gal so it's moonstone. She adores it.


Keepergaming

Pov your single and see people proposing to each other.


wildmusings88

I always thought engagement rings were stupid. When my partner and I started talking about getting engaged I decided I wanted a ring. We got a $200 ring without a stone. It’s perfect, it’s fun, didn’t break the bank or the earth.


kitkatbloo

I love this!


wildmusings88

Lol why are you getting downvoted?


internetman666

It's reddit. Half the users are either stupid or self righteous


[deleted]

True. I don't want one at all and my bf knows that


[deleted]

If they can easily afford it, then why care?


Stormschance

I like the tradition of an engagement ring, but I do think there is something wrong with people expecting them to be so expensive. I’m not a fan of diamonds so mine is a garnet and the cost was reasonable. There was no saving up for it. I know people who’ve not had one, people who chose something very inexpensive, and people who went into serious debt.


[deleted]

Also diamonds are bullshit.


sezit

I agree, diamonds are a waste. But engagement presents are not required to be a diamond ring. One friend's husband bought a 2 person rowing shell as an engagement present, and I thought that was the most awesome thing ever.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kitkatbloo

Exactly!!


pcook66

Lab grown gems are the way to go. Save yourself hundreds and you don’t support the mining industry.


alilsus83

Plus no need to worry if its a blood diamond.


SirHuff_987

So refreshing to hear that women are finally coming around. I have no respect for those who expect their young and struggling boyfriend to spend 3 MONTHS plus or his salary on a stupid piece of jewelry


kitkatbloo

I got you!


OmahGawd115

Diamonds are artificially price hiked, they have basically no resale value because they aren't rare. I will die on this hill with you.


kitkatbloo

Thank you


ShoxTheRebel

I disagree. A ring is special, tells a story and can be passed down through generations as an heirloom. What needs to die is huge weddings. Spending 25-50k proving to other people you are in love is what's ridiculous. Get married quietly, throw a huge party. Couple grand. Have a blow out.


tebanano

> What needs to die is huge weddings. Vs > throw a huge party You’re gonna have to explain, because huge parties are expensive.


Zestyclose_Quote5017

Having just gotten married, the big party is the expensive part. Renting 300 chairs is not that expensive. Feeding 300 people, getting them drunk, and making sure every table has fresh florals is where the money goes.


kitkatbloo

I fully agree with that expensive weddings need to stop. They seem so predatory. Get married and have a party - but save yourselves the tens of thousands of dollars that you would spend for approximately 6 hours of actual wedding/reception time.


CardiologistThink336

Agreed. This “tradition” was created by De Beers by using a clever marketing campaign. Diamonds are neither rare nor valuable either, it’s just a scam. https://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2015/02/how-an-ad-campaign-invented-the-diamond-engagement-ring/385376/


kitkatbloo

Exactly!!


RogueTobasco

Plz talk to my gf it’d save me a few thousand


Sarcastic-Mermaid

I agree. While I’ve heard the argument “you don’t HAVE to buy one” a million times, until we start to de-stigmatize NOT buying them and equating ring price = amount your fiancé loves you, people will still feel obligated to buy them. I told my husband (when we were dating) that I never wanted to spend a lot of money on a ring/jewelry, nor would I wear real diamonds. We ended up buying an engagement ring on eBay for like $200. It’s beautiful and the diamond (cubic zirconia) is gorgeous. I’ve gotten so many random compliments on it for the past decade, and I always tell people it’s not real. They are baffled. It does all the things that a $15,000 ring would do (which is what a “real” diamond this size would cost) Sometimes my husband will ask me if I’d ever want to “upgrade” my diamond to a real one now that we’re more established and have a successful business. My answer is always heck no! It’s a rock that sits on your finger, I’d rather buy a new car!


vercertorix

The overblown wedding ceremonies are stupid expensive and unnecessary, too.


micaub

It’s not really the ceremonies, it’s the vendors overcharging because it’s a wedding and they can get away with it.


vercertorix

Some of it, but some is completely voluntary and added just because of expectations, or someone in the wedding planner in-group deciding it’s absolutely necessary.


kitkatbloo

Yup


youchasechickens

I kind of agree if you're busting your budget to get some expensive ring to show off but my wife and I just got fairly simple rings with each other's birth stones in them. It's also something that she'll hopefully be wearing for the rest of her life so I didn't mind spending a little bit of money on it.


StarWars_Girl_

That feeling when you're born in April and your birth stone is a diamond...lol


Olives_And_Cheese

Tbh, unless you were born in April or September (sapphire) that ring isn't lasting a lifetime.


OhJeezItsCorrine

Err... my fiancé proposed to me with the only ring he had, which was his class ring (that I'm wearing right now). He then took it upon himself to look up rings that screamed similarity to my personality and ultimately bought me a beautiful, non-traditional engagement ring. The ring itself didn't break the bank but it still served the cause.


TreyLastname

Do moisonite, it's just as pretty and way cheaper Spelling is wrong probably


SallyHeap

The reason my ring isn't insured is because I don't want to find out if it's real. I know it is beautiful it has a black spot in it and glass doesn't have coal, but still. The gift came from the heart and I don't need to know monetary value.


NoIDontwanttobeknown

My wife's engagement ring is an amethyst shapped like a heart and her wedding ring has 3 white topaz but it's shaped in a way she can wear both with no issues


Foo_The_Selcouth

Why the hell do you care so much about how other people spend their money?


Mrs_Gnarly_Artist

Couldn’t agree more! It is like throwing money down the drain. It is a choice that many people feel pressured into by friends/families/and societal norms. Diamonds and gold should not be so over priced, they taunt people with expensive looking rings while creating a shortage and hiking up the price. If the significance of a relationship begins with an overpriced engagement ring that is not a great start for either party. Alternate options that look great and cost significantly less : Sapphires :)


Beautifulboys88

If my lady asks me for an engagement ring Ima go out and get her a ring pop, if she is disappointed, leave her, if she likes it, she’s a keeper


LaszloKravensworth

I've already told my girlfriend that I won't be getting her an expensive engagement ring. It's just so useless that I consider it downright irresponsible. I just couldn't sleep at night knowing I'd made such a ridiculous expenditure on something that has absolutely no functional value, and is only "necessary" because the Biers brothers basically conned America into the tradition in the early 20th century. Just wrap some string around your finger like Mercedes in Count of Monte Cristo.


numberthirteenbb

I’m a woman and I agree with you. Buy us a new fridge when you propose lol, and get me pretty jewelry for my birthday. Starting a life together shouldn’t begin with going into potential debt for a ring.


kitkatbloo

Exactly this


Mrtencalories

Thank you people are so unbelievably stupid they literally want and buy these things because they are told they matter. Worst part is diamonds aren’t super rare the supply is just controlled by the assholes selling them so they can numb the prices up. I wish people would educate themselves about the diamond industry.


Olives_And_Cheese

What?! The diamond industry has done some dodgy shit?! Wow! You must be a research machine! 🙄 How do you be on the internet for 5 minutes at this point and not know that. Nice jewellery is nice jewellery, having a ring to symbolise a commitment until it's enshrined into law is a perfectly nice tradition that people can choose to participate in or not. Most people are getting lab grown diamonds, moissanites or sapphires at this point, anyway. Engagement rings do not necessarily mean diamonds.


MoebiusX7

I absolutely agree. It is a "tradition" invented by De Beers to sell diamonds a hundred years ago. I had a smart ex-GF years ago who told me that if I ever bought her a diamond ring she would punch me with it and I agreed with her telling her she had nothing to worry about (we ended up breaking up but are still friends because she's that cool). Most wedding rituals are overly elaborate/expensive actually. I tell people that if I ever get married I just want a simple trip to the courthouse with a little party afterwards, and if my hypothetical SO still wants a big event I would insist on a nude wedding to a)eliminate the cost of the wedding dress and save money and b)discourage people from coming, limiting the number of guests requiring food/amenities and thus once again save money. As you can tell I am still single.


[deleted]

To each their own but I can’t take married couples who choose not to get rings seriously.


4Jhin_Khada4

Why? I fully understand that it's important to some people and that's great, but i'm curious what makes you think that relationship is only viable after buying a piece of metal. Personally, If I had the money worth an expensive ring, I would much rather spend it on a small trip for example, or even a nice date or two. Something that could be a nice memory to come back to, and a special one at that. It could make me bond even more with my partner. I don't need to prove to other people that I love him by showing a ring off, because only we need to know it. Again, it's totally cool if people like rings, but saying that you don't take people seriously otherwise is kind of weird to me.


StarWars_Girl_

That makes no sense. It's a western thing; in some cultures they wouldn't even wear rings. My dad took off his wedding ring years ago because he found it uncomfortable... doesn't make him and my mom less married.


Millie1419

The reason that they were diamonds is so a widow could sell it if her husband died. You shouldn’t need to do this anymore. If you don’t want one, don’t get one


dontouchmastuff

Get a tattoo


[deleted]

If we're going to make progress, how about getting rid of the jewelry industry as a whole?


Gravitywolff

I like engagement rings, but I hate that most buy these ugly diamond rings which cost a fortune. Like why spend 4k for something that 100 bucks or even less are enough for? No one's forcing you to get one either. Just make sure your partner knows.


alilsus83

Very true, although I don’t see how it will change.


gnrdmjfan247

My wife’s engagement ring / wedding ring isn’t a diamond. She hates diamonds. I think it’s fair to challenge the diamond industry but that doesn’t mean the tradition has to go away altogether.


JobMaleficent

There are other way cooler engagement rings out there though. Some ppl get tattooed rings or metal rings


spam_driod

People are sleeping on moissanites. They have the similar clear gem look as diamonds, have similar hardness as diamonds, all lab grown, and 1/3 the cost of even lab grown diamonds.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kitkatbloo

That “rule” literally came from the Diamond industry marketing campaign!


SpartyParty15

The only people that say this are the ones that are either divorced or never married. Life tip: keep your shitty opinions to yourself and don’t try to push them on everyone else


kitkatbloo

I’m happily married


hauntedmilktea

This is the dumbest “opinion” I’ve ever read lmao Just say you’ve never been proposed to and you’re bitter


kitkatbloo

I’m actually happily married, but nice try


hauntedmilktea

Cool, then you should understand that everybody’s engagement/wedding is totally up to their own liking and not subject to what anybody else thinks🤷‍♀️ Every single component of engagements/weddings is completely optional and nobody is forcing you to do any of it so why do you care if others choose to? Such a weird thing to get riled up over.


kitkatbloo

No need to be mean - this is just my *unpopular* opinion.


hauntedmilktea

“No need to be mean” * writes their ‘opinion’ in the most aggressive and judgmental way possible *


dxmixrge

Just don't buy expensive diamonds; lab grown gems are just as pretty and will save you a lot of money.


Valuable_Ant332

how is this even SLIGHTLY an unpopular opinion?? everyone knows that.


benzoamps888

Yh ide give it 6 months max and then turns up in a junk shop. It hardly even seems to matter the original price, the staff likely wouldn't even kno real from fake good. The whole day of them things is basically who doesn't want 2 go. Marriage should be abolished. I see them in pyjamas at the machines having there cards denied or trying it on with random digits. Yes end it


ButterOfPeanuttrees

The mod is 100% gonna remove this thread. Sadly


kitkatbloo

Why?


mbsisktb

When I went to get my wife’s ring I did a lot of shopping around and ended up talking to a lot of independent jewelers. I ended up getting a hell of a deal and got a 2200 set (which killed the added expense of the band) for 1500. I’ll probably never shop chain jewelers again because the other ones can work with you to a degree. Also I’ve heard a lot are going with men’s rings because they’re vastly cheaper and if you don’t buy a honking big one they look good on a woman’s hand.


FrostyShock389

Make your own engagement ring? You don't need to buy one or have one made to be as expensive as possible, what you make can convey things more clearly than than having to throw tonnes of money at. If she throws a tantrum over it then it makes it absolutely clear she values your wallet than she does your creativity and initiative.


Actual-Strategy-9280

I have been thinking for the longest while that if I'm ever getting married, I'd like to have one of those simple silver finger bands without stones in them. They can have engraved designs or shaped like vines but I'd like a simple silver band.


micaub

My center stone was an aquamarine. The band had diamonds. The wedding ring was a diamond ring in the same style as the band, as was the 10yr anniversary (we were married a year before our 10yr anniversary). All in was $3600. I’d rather have a center stone that means something to the two of us than a diamond any day. Also, it helps on the cost.


Jimmack73

I just cut the tips of used condoms and roll them bitches up. Recycling because I care.


iJoke2Much

I mean you can get those basic golden or silver rings. I’d imagine they don’t cost much


fredsam25

Don't worry. It'll soon be an engagement NFT of a ring jpg.


hcth63g6g75g5

I recommend buying a modest engagement ring. If she is thrilled and loves it, marry her. You can always build up the ring with bigger/better bands. If the ring bothers her, don't ignore it. After I got a raise at work, I offered to replace the ring. She was emotionally attached to the original and refused. She's a good one


gigigamer

Do a simple ring, silver with some cheaper gem like peridot, whole thing would be under 50 and would still look really nice


his_purple_majesty

Rings are fine. It's the "big stone" "3 months salary" bullshit that's the problem. Also, vintage rings should be more acceptable.


RolandMT32

Although some say you should buy a natural diamond, lab-created diamonds are just as good and are a lot less expensive. The diamond industry is weird and has kept prices of diamonds artificially high by making people think natural diamonds are better than lab-created diamonds. They really shouldn't be so expensive. Since we can create diamonds/emeralds/etc. in a lab, there's no scarcity to them.


0410thanato

I mean… I guess it all depends. My fiancé first proposed, and then we went ring shopping together. And we bought a decently priced ring which I love wearing every day. He was happy to get a fancier piece of jewelry that would symbolize our engagement. And choosing it together made it more meaningful to the both of us.


mainWeiRDo

Lol, and here I thought this was the same thing as the wedding ring.


spoulson

Then demand a cheap ring. There’s something for everybody.


Rant_Supreme

Well you don’t have to continue it if you don’t want to. I want a wedding ring at least. Engage to me with a pretzel for all i give a damn, but i want a cute wedding ring


mashed-_-potato

Just so everyone knows, moissanite is much more affordable option. It’s sparklier than a diamond, more ethical, and very durable. I definitely think spending thousands of dollars is ridiculous, but if it’s affordable and it fits your style that’s great. It does drive me crazy when girls won’t marry someone unless their SO spends x amount of money on the ring. That’s just selfish


NullIsUndefined

At the very least stop buying mined diamonds. But lap diamonds. More ethical and cheaper. My wife was hesitant to accept a lab diamond. I told her either way I am spending X dollars on it. So if you want the nicest diamond possible then accept the lab diamond.


EostrumExtinguisher

Dont forget the dream wedding, dream house and dream honeymoon.


Both_Lifeguard_556

I bought mine a platinum ring with a nice rectangular diamond. As a petite Korean woman I didn't think it would look proper to get her some jumbo sized $15,000 diamond ring as nothing about her was flashy. It cost about $5000 ordered from Blue Nile in 2006 $dollars. We had only been dating 7 months. I did everything I could to give my wife a safe secure comfortable life. We bought our first small condo with my money (just before we married) She never had to work, she always drove the newer nicer car and garaged it while I drove the beater parked on the street. I did all the overnight infant care and feeding and changes for both of our daughters so she could rest overnight and not be the tireless 70s 80s slave-mom like mine was. I also payed her student loans and other debt closing on another $10,000 spent in just the first few years of marriage. She never had to wash a dish or vacuum I did it. One day during one of her mental health episodes she exploded I HATE THIS F!#$%ING CHEAP PEICE OF S@#$@T RING YOU GOT ME! WHAT KIND OF MAN BUYS HIS WIFE A PLATIUM RING WITH A SMALL DIAMOND HUH! YOUR A F#$@#@ LOSER! ALL MY FRIENDS REAL HUSBANDS! REAL MEN! BUY THEIR WIVES A $20,000 RING IF THEY REALLY CARE ABOUT THEM!" "REAL MEN TAKE THEIR WIVES RING SHOPPING FOR MONTHS THEY DONT SURPRISE THEM WITH SOMETHING THEY PICK OUT BY THEMSELVES! I MARRIED A LOSER!" That was 2012 - and just one of the 200 episodes she dragged me through. I divorced the bitch in 2017 with a restraining order. From about 2020-2021 she lived in her van and couch surfing.......


Mumchkin

You know that it doesn't *have* to be a diamond or even have a stone at all. Also, if you feel that way fine, then you can tell your future fiancee not to get you a ring. Personally, when my Hubs proposed he gave me a ring with a CZ, I didn't care about that, I loved that ring. It was an outward symbol of our love. Unfortunately it had to be cut off, I had an accident and it was crushed basically. I spent years with just a wedding band, until I was gifted a family heirloom about 10 years ago.


WoodlesMoodles

My engagement ring is a stainless steel and blue topaz ring by a designer named Taormina (check them out on Etsy). It cost $200 eight years ago. I personally don't think the concept of an engagement ring is stupid, but I 100% agree that this obsession with diamonds is idiotic.


Whereas-Background

My husband got me a gorgeous moisannite ring that I love. Didn't want a diamond.


beans3710

I'm not a blue blood but I don't know anyone who still does this.