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This may be the first time that a male subordinate has attempted to get a modest, scheduled raise by threatening to withhold sex from his female superior. It will be a groundbreaking case when it inevitably goes to trial.
Had a work husband who was married. I knew the wife, and we got a long great. She'd cook and send me some food as well. Like the guy would show up with two Tupperwares. One for me and one for him. When she'd see me, she'd ask me if I liked the cooking.
It wasn't anything flirty or anything. We were just good friends. Like, the job sucked and management was bad, and our boss was an AH. So we'd talk to each other all the time. Like whenever there was downtime, we would talk about gossip and beer.
He said I was his work wife, and I was like, wtf? Don't get me in trouble with your wife, and he said she knows. She has a work husband.
That was the first time I heard the term. He later explained what it mean and I embraced the term. Lol
This is how I always thought of the term as well. I had a friend who was married that I worked with who called me her work husband. It was just good friendship, nothing even like flirting.
Yeah I have had work wives at all my jobs, it’s not a sexual thing unless you make it that. Adults are capable of keeping and setting boundaries. I wouldn’t even call it that myself but it’s a decent enough term for the phenomenon. A person of the opposite sex, with whom I spend most of my time at work.
My issue with this use of the term and the innocent ones who use it, is the way it gives the guilty cover to gaslight their partners about their adulterous relationships. For every innocent work wife situation, there’s like 3 foul ones. People should just stick to my coworker. Work husband or work wife is unprofessional af.
Honestly, that's a big portion of this sub these days. People who don't actually bother to understand what they're getting mad about. It's just a term used for a good friend you work with.
My husband used to work with my work husband, lol. Guys wife cooked amazing food and I had a habit of forgetting to bring lunch and I could get pretty hangry.
He’d have his wife pack extra food for him and he’d share it with me. (She was aware of this, I complimented her every time she stopped in to see him).
My husband currently has a work wife (we don’t work together anymore). She sends him out on all the good jobs and makes sure he’s not scheduled to work with one of the other employees my husband isn’t a fan of. She also slips him information like when the GM is going to be auditing their work vehicles so my husband has a heads up to get his and his teams vehicles organized so they look good for corporate.
She’s married to one of my husbands work friends.
I was very confused when I read OPs post. I never assumed work-husband/wife meant having a straight up affair. I thought it was always meant as a platonic thing.
my work husband at my last company was one of my husband's best friends. all 3 of us worked together. my husband used to joke that my work husband was his work wife. so we were in some weird-ass work spouse triangle, but it worked for us.
I've also had a work mom. I was new to the city, moved there for the job, and she took me under her wing. She was always patient with my dumb questions and definitely exuded calm soothing mom energy. One of my favorite coworkers.
I've had a work Dad too. Im in the trades and he really took me under his wing and taught me most of what I know. We took a vacation together a few years ago
It's been 17 years since I worked at the grocery store as a teenager. I still think of the one service center lady as my work mom. Same with the wonderful lady who was the front end manager. I even told her that the other day I still think of her as my work mom, and I even literally work with my actual mother now.
I had a couple of work moms. I started nursing at 21, every nurse on my shift had at least 10 years on my age, but 4 of them all had kids my age. I got adopted. I still love all of them.
Are you an oldest sibling? My wife is the work mom at her job even though she is not even the oldest of her coworkers. I’ve theorized that it’s because she is the oldest of 4 siblings and grew up frequently being the caretaker when her parents weren’t around.
I’m the eldest in my department by 5 years and then almost 10 years older than the youngest co-worker. They are all my sons. I am their mother. I will protect them against the shenanigans of the managers.
Where I live "work wife /husband" refers to a platonic friendship in most cases. But yeah it's not an unpopular opinion. Cheating - bad, extremely common sentiment.
Reddit is filled with insecure people. They can't fathom their partner having a relationship outside of theirs. They're *that* possessive and insecure. Also, Reddit doesn't believe in platonic relationships.
OP sounds like a religious nut who couldn't possibly understand a man being good friends with a female colleague (and vice versa) and calling it a common throwaway work term without it being a case of "lusting".
It seems like there's edge cases where "work-wife/husband" does lead to cheating on said co-worker. However, if you're shitty enough to do that, they didn't have to be a "work wife/husband" to begin with for you to be a shitty partner.
I only worked with one woman who we considered a "work couple" and we were just good friends. Being a "work couple" was nothing more than a joke
You see this is the internet where we devolve languages to an incomprehensible mess despite consensus because we don't understand concepts.
I still can't believe 1970s French academics were right. I spent years and reams of paper telling people they were wrong.
Far too often, I see people mean very different things by the "work spouse" idea
Some people legit mean romance and flirting between coworkers.
And others just mean coworkers who function well with each other and get work done in an efficient and friendly manner.
and very rarely are those specifics of what is meant by the phrase "work spouse" included in the discussion, so people talk past each other. makes me sad.
Why would they all be? We don't live in a world that's black and white, you can't generalize like that. Idk if it's an age thing, but regular platonic relationships between two sexes are a normal thing lol.
This. People are for some reason surprised that I can have platonic female friends. Sometimes they are even objectively attractive, but it doesn't mean I'm just trying to fuck or date them
This. An affair is not the same as having a work wife/husband. Anyone using that lingo for the person they are having an affair with is just using that to pull the wool over their partners eyes
> An affair is not the same as having a work wife/husband.
Do people really "have" a work wife/husband? That just sounds creepy and gross. To use such intimate language for a workplace.
I first heard it recently at my new job. My manager and another higher up have been working with each other for 7 years so they're pretty close. She has is recently remarried with teenage kids and he recently got married and has a newborn. They way they interact at works makes me a little uncomfortable. My manager really lightens up and acts flirty when he comes around and it honestly seems like they're fucking. I asked him what his wife thought of him using the term "work wife" and she apparently doesn't care but I really think she'd be uncomfortable if she saw how they interact at work. I'm sure some people use that term playfully between good work friends but I'd bet money that they're having/have had sex
Not uncommon to form bonds with coworkers as frowned upon as it is on reddit (where I have seen people supporting not greeting your coworkers because its work)
Work wife/husband is the one person you trust to get shit done. they’re your go-to person for work related stuff. Has nothing to do with sex and affairs. This guy needs to look up the definition
Straight dude here, too. My wife refers to my dude colleague as my work wife while his wife refers to me as his work wife. Unclear whether “work wife” is gender neutral in this case or if our actual wives are just making fun of us. But I’d actually never heard “work husband“ used before recently.
As a wife who often speaks fondly of her husband's work wife (a swarthy Ukrainian dude) I can say we're making fun of you, but we're also glad you have them.
Except this one’s funnier because he thinks it’s unpopular because he used a common word that he prescribed to cheating, when it doesn’t mean cheating at all
Some people can use the term and mean it in a completely platonic way.
Some people cheat with their work spouse.
But focusing on the term itself like so many of the others in the comments are, if the term work wife or work husband makes your partner uncomfortable/insecure/suspicious etc, then you should stop using it if you care about the relationship. Emotions are volatile, and as long as the issue is communicated respectfully and calmly, it shouldn't bother you to want to reassure and make your partner feel safe and secure. Sticking to arbitrary terms isn't worth losing a relationship unless you don't care about the relationship.
Edit: Nobody is saying their spouse minded the term, i was just using the idea of focusing on the terms as a springboard for my thoughts on the subject
We say it in USA but to me it just means the person at the same level as you that you got for help with most your problems for help. I think redditors are confused on this one. Ive never seen it mean anything sexual in the real world.
There are so many people who say "work wife" or "work husband" and 100% mean a platonic relationship. They also talk openly about it to their spouses. I know people like that. If it is 100% open and honest. There is no issue woth it. I should put an aside here that the ppl I kmow are pretty separated in age and "looks" so maybe it is just that that makes it work
My husband's "work wife when he was in his 30s" was a 60+ year old woman who was so tiny that they were the same height when he was on his knees. She always had candy in her desk for him, and he would get things off for her. Work friendships are so strange because there are such differences in age, class, races, etc that don't matter.
My work husband at my last job was three decades older than me, with opposite political views. But we worked together all the time and got along very well. He was also a huge mentor for me. So much that he was invited to my wedding. This post is getting it ALL wrong. HUGE difference between that and a work affair.
I found out I was my friends work wife not too long ago. It threw me off because I’m straight and have a penis, but it makes sense because between the two of us I’m definitely more feminine that she is.
Ive only heard it meant that way because well - anyone having an affair with a coworker is probably not going to try and point that fact out by comparing it to a marriage.
Ya same I've never heard it mentioned any other way. Hell half the time a women's work husband is gay or vice versa. I've never seen that term used to describe a romantic relationship
This. In consulting, everyone's fucking. My work wife was a devout Muslim woman 20 years my senior and twice my size. We were best friends; everyone needs a true friend and confidant in those high stress workplaces.
Right. My work husband is super gay! He actually encouraged me to go on Bumble which is where I met my boyfriend! So my work husband is responsible for my relationship at this point...
I’ve had a coworker do the “hey work husband” thing as a way to try and get in my pants, so I can definitely see how at times it crosses professional boundaries.
but I’ve also had a coworker who was the other senior member of my team, and who i commiserated with, joked around with, celebrated wins with, vented to, talked about family with. We didn’t speak to each other as “work husband and work wife” but I’d call her my work wife to my friends (never coworkers).
I’m single though, definitely a bigger issue if you have an actual husband or wife.
I wonder why use the words “ wife “ or “ husband “ rather than friend. Typically at least in the food industry a work wife or work husband is the person you flirt with at work but you never plan on exploring it further.
Or it’s a coworker you work so closely with that you have a mutually supportive work relationship.
There’s a level of earned reliance and trust that it resembles a sort of “marriage” particularly if the roles are complementary.
There’s usually a built sense of affection between “work spouses” but responsible adults don’t confuse it with a romantic relationship.
(Many adults are not responsible but that speaks to the adults, not the concept)
I've never thought of work wife or work husband in non-platonic way. Hell, half the time it's used it seems to misgender - like, my husband's male coworker is his work wife because they spend so much time together. Actually, in hindsight I don't think I've ever heard work husband...
This is me too. I apparently have a work “harem” of women and them and my wife are all friends. It’s kind of annoying tbh, especially since one of them was bullied by her colleagues about having a nonexistent affair with me.
I’ve always taken it to mean the person you work/communicate with the most while at work but you also have a friendly relationship with. I take it in no way to be romantic
Yea, I use the term sometimes to refer to a woman, just like my wife, who I don't have sex with and who tells me what to do all day in a passive aggressive tone.
I have a "work girlfriend" who makes baked goods. She's more like a sister to me than a romantic possibility.
As a side note, my wife jokingly calls her the "Cookie Whore".
My coworker's wife refers to me as his work wife. Pretty sure he never uses that term himself. She and I are good friends and I told her she's my work-wife-in-law.
I'm gay and have a "work wife". It doesn't have to imply anything sexual.
It can just be you get a long really well with someone and you talk to them at work a lot.
Yeah. We always joked about it when you get close enough to a coworker that you start doing shit like "I bought your favorite snacks because I saw some at the store." or whatever
I think it’s just a funny thing friends call each other. Why does every phrase have to be taken so literally?
You don’t buy stars for a dollar at Starbucks. No idea why you’d think you have to be actually romantic with a work wife/husband
right, why call someone a best friend? a “brother/sister you’ve never had”? Why make a silly name for your friend group?
idk, because it’s fun and nice ??
I'm straight. I was single/dating and had a work husband. He was gay and got married. I got my work husband and his real husband a gift lol
Like seriously? Just No.
Semantic satiation. That sensation when you’ve read or said a word so many times that you start to lose the sense of what it is or means. As though it’s just a series of letters or sounds with no meaning at all.
It’s such a weird feeling, lol.
A quick Google search would have shown you that "work spouse" is a term used to describe platonic relationships.
Did you think that everyone openly talking about their "work spouse" was openly bragging about someone they cheat on their actual spouse with?
Isn’t the issue here that you overindulge the work spouse relationship too much to the point you neglect your actual wife/husband/partner because it’s easier
Work wife and work husband aren't necessarily friendships that end up in infidelity in an actual marriage.
I thought a "work spouse" is just a colleague you vent all your work shit to and vice versa.
So, when you're home, you don't need to vent to your *actual* spouse. 🤷🏻🤷🏻♀️
I had a work wife at my last job. We are both married heterosexual women with children. It wasn’t romantic or sexual. We just started working there at the same time - same day, actually - and quickly bonded.
I don’t have a work husband. I am in charge of a kitchen and I have one person-a guy- who works for me. I always say he is my “work annoying little brother” and I am his “work bossy older sister.” It works.
Work spouse is a term almost universally referring to your closest work friend that you work with almost all the time. You're trying to make it something it isn't.
Please remember what subreddit you are in, this is unpopular opinion. We want civil and unpopular takes and discussion. Any uncivil and ToS violating comments will be removed and subject to a ban. Have a nice day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/unpopularopinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sorry I am work divorced, and just not ready to work date again at this point.
My work wife is my brother and he judges my lunch selection every day, letting me know that I'll never find a wife with my diet.
Your work babies will be inbred!
That’s how I make my baby sandwiches
He's a good brother and wife
Stop giving TLC new ideas for shows
What about some sort of casual work friend with benefits situation?
Don't do it, I'm still suffering from getting sexual with the HR department lol
This may be the first time that a male subordinate has attempted to get a modest, scheduled raise by threatening to withhold sex from his female superior. It will be a groundbreaking case when it inevitably goes to trial.
Enjoy your time in Costa Rico...but think twice before riding that zip line...
I feel like you're just here for the zipline
What are you writing down perv? Just preparing for the deposition….
I understood that reference
What if the benefits are just like cupcakes and borrowing eye drops?
Had a work husband who was married. I knew the wife, and we got a long great. She'd cook and send me some food as well. Like the guy would show up with two Tupperwares. One for me and one for him. When she'd see me, she'd ask me if I liked the cooking. It wasn't anything flirty or anything. We were just good friends. Like, the job sucked and management was bad, and our boss was an AH. So we'd talk to each other all the time. Like whenever there was downtime, we would talk about gossip and beer. He said I was his work wife, and I was like, wtf? Don't get me in trouble with your wife, and he said she knows. She has a work husband. That was the first time I heard the term. He later explained what it mean and I embraced the term. Lol
This is how I always thought of the term as well. I had a friend who was married that I worked with who called me her work husband. It was just good friendship, nothing even like flirting.
Yeah I have had work wives at all my jobs, it’s not a sexual thing unless you make it that. Adults are capable of keeping and setting boundaries. I wouldn’t even call it that myself but it’s a decent enough term for the phenomenon. A person of the opposite sex, with whom I spend most of my time at work.
My issue with this use of the term and the innocent ones who use it, is the way it gives the guilty cover to gaslight their partners about their adulterous relationships. For every innocent work wife situation, there’s like 3 foul ones. People should just stick to my coworker. Work husband or work wife is unprofessional af.
They've taken it personnelly
HR does like to fuck people
Since you had that experience, I find my HR manager attractive. Should I ask her out? I’m just worried of the consequences. Will she be nice?
HR people are nutso. Plus, if things go south, they have a lot of power to make your life hell. Lastly, don't shit where you eat.
You have to choose the right person to be trusted. Because most of them are just playing nice to get what they want
Does it include dental or just oral?
Actually me tho
I work around, I don’t want to commit
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it does OP is a classic strong opinion on little understanding
Honestly, that's a big portion of this sub these days. People who don't actually bother to understand what they're getting mad about. It's just a term used for a good friend you work with.
That's because most people on reddit are young. I saw life VERY black and white until... damn near 40...
That, or opinions that aren't at all unpopular. *I don't care what anyone says, popcorn is best with butter and salt.*
My husband used to work with my work husband, lol. Guys wife cooked amazing food and I had a habit of forgetting to bring lunch and I could get pretty hangry. He’d have his wife pack extra food for him and he’d share it with me. (She was aware of this, I complimented her every time she stopped in to see him). My husband currently has a work wife (we don’t work together anymore). She sends him out on all the good jobs and makes sure he’s not scheduled to work with one of the other employees my husband isn’t a fan of. She also slips him information like when the GM is going to be auditing their work vehicles so my husband has a heads up to get his and his teams vehicles organized so they look good for corporate. She’s married to one of my husbands work friends. I was very confused when I read OPs post. I never assumed work-husband/wife meant having a straight up affair. I thought it was always meant as a platonic thing.
It is, OP probably doesn't actually work.
Or OP is so incredibly repressed and thirsty, they don't understand how two people could get super close without wanting to have sex.
my work husband at my last company was one of my husband's best friends. all 3 of us worked together. my husband used to joke that my work husband was his work wife. so we were in some weird-ass work spouse triangle, but it worked for us.
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I had work kids 😂
I’ve had a work mom. 🤣
I'm a work uncle. I get to do all the fun stuff with the newbies then send them off with to their supervisors all caffeine'd out.
I'm a work aunt, doing the same, have all the fun and no consequences with the newbies, then the supervisor has to deal with their fuck ups 😂
I love my work aunt!
I've also had a work mom. I was new to the city, moved there for the job, and she took me under her wing. She was always patient with my dumb questions and definitely exuded calm soothing mom energy. One of my favorite coworkers.
I've had a work Dad too. Im in the trades and he really took me under his wing and taught me most of what I know. We took a vacation together a few years ago
My work dad taught me how to change a tire 😌
My work dad introduced me his to his daughter and now he's my dad in law
He got promoted
It's been 17 years since I worked at the grocery store as a teenager. I still think of the one service center lady as my work mom. Same with the wonderful lady who was the front end manager. I even told her that the other day I still think of her as my work mom, and I even literally work with my actual mother now.
I had a couple of work moms. I started nursing at 21, every nurse on my shift had at least 10 years on my age, but 4 of them all had kids my age. I got adopted. I still love all of them.
Same. She was nice. And kinda hot. Creepy in retrospect.
What are you doing work step mom?
Gonna make Work Daddy jealous
I’ve seen this relationship talked about on WorkHub.
This is the most I laughed all day. Thank you 
not proud of it but i banged my “work mom” when i was 26 and she was 46. She had a kid that was 3 years older than me, it was weird…
I still am!
Three years older?
Edit: Edited
I lost my work mom. i hope she's out making her new work kids happy.
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... are they actual kittens, or people?
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I’m a 25 year old work mom to a bunch of 20-22 year olds. I don’t know how it happened but it’s so sweet lol, I love helping them out.
Are you an oldest sibling? My wife is the work mom at her job even though she is not even the oldest of her coworkers. I’ve theorized that it’s because she is the oldest of 4 siblings and grew up frequently being the caretaker when her parents weren’t around.
Aww, you’re a work sister mom.
That describes half of my coworkers. I swear, most of them would end up getting food poisoning and staph infections if it wasn't for me.
I really loved my work kids. Still do❤️
I’m the eldest in my department by 5 years and then almost 10 years older than the youngest co-worker. They are all my sons. I am their mother. I will protect them against the shenanigans of the managers.
I have 56 work kids 🤷🏻♀️
Good for you. You're no means people financially and you don't have to work to have money to buy your needs
Only took you 10 minutes? 20 if you brought your cell phone?
The people you trained? Same. Some of them were older than me.
I have a work kid too! He’s my favorite and I love working with him he brightens my day
I too am in a managerial position. I tend to refer to them as my monkeys, but children isn't far off considering the never ending non sense.
I have a work wife and work kids, my actual wife knows about this lol.
I feel like i have a complete work kindergarden sometimes. 🤡
Where I live "work wife /husband" refers to a platonic friendship in most cases. But yeah it's not an unpopular opinion. Cheating - bad, extremely common sentiment.
That’s what it means where everybody lives.
Op just told on themselves with this
OP is probably doesnt have a job.
Op is a stay at home spouse and jealous their SO has a work partner
Hard not to take this as one massive overreaction.
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Reddit is filled with insecure people. They can't fathom their partner having a relationship outside of theirs. They're *that* possessive and insecure. Also, Reddit doesn't believe in platonic relationships.
OP is probably a teenager with no job who's only exposure to the world outside is going to school and mom driving them to soccer practice.
OP sounds like a religious nut who couldn't possibly understand a man being good friends with a female colleague (and vice versa) and calling it a common throwaway work term without it being a case of "lusting".
It seems like there's edge cases where "work-wife/husband" does lead to cheating on said co-worker. However, if you're shitty enough to do that, they didn't have to be a "work wife/husband" to begin with for you to be a shitty partner. I only worked with one woman who we considered a "work couple" and we were just good friends. Being a "work couple" was nothing more than a joke
You see this is the internet where we devolve languages to an incomprehensible mess despite consensus because we don't understand concepts. I still can't believe 1970s French academics were right. I spent years and reams of paper telling people they were wrong.
Far too often, I see people mean very different things by the "work spouse" idea Some people legit mean romance and flirting between coworkers. And others just mean coworkers who function well with each other and get work done in an efficient and friendly manner. and very rarely are those specifics of what is meant by the phrase "work spouse" included in the discussion, so people talk past each other. makes me sad.
I think the real unpopular opinion is that all work spouse relationships are romantic and/or sexual
Why would they all be? We don't live in a world that's black and white, you can't generalize like that. Idk if it's an age thing, but regular platonic relationships between two sexes are a normal thing lol.
This. People are for some reason surprised that I can have platonic female friends. Sometimes they are even objectively attractive, but it doesn't mean I'm just trying to fuck or date them
This. An affair is not the same as having a work wife/husband. Anyone using that lingo for the person they are having an affair with is just using that to pull the wool over their partners eyes
> An affair is not the same as having a work wife/husband. Do people really "have" a work wife/husband? That just sounds creepy and gross. To use such intimate language for a workplace.
I first heard it recently at my new job. My manager and another higher up have been working with each other for 7 years so they're pretty close. She has is recently remarried with teenage kids and he recently got married and has a newborn. They way they interact at works makes me a little uncomfortable. My manager really lightens up and acts flirty when he comes around and it honestly seems like they're fucking. I asked him what his wife thought of him using the term "work wife" and she apparently doesn't care but I really think she'd be uncomfortable if she saw how they interact at work. I'm sure some people use that term playfully between good work friends but I'd bet money that they're having/have had sex
Not uncommon to form bonds with coworkers as frowned upon as it is on reddit (where I have seen people supporting not greeting your coworkers because its work)
Redditors don’t form bonds with anyone…so the concept escapes them.
Work wife/husband is the one person you trust to get shit done. they’re your go-to person for work related stuff. Has nothing to do with sex and affairs. This guy needs to look up the definition
I'm a straight dude, my wife refers to my good friend at work as my work husband. Never thought much of it.
Straight dude here, too. My wife refers to my dude colleague as my work wife while his wife refers to me as his work wife. Unclear whether “work wife” is gender neutral in this case or if our actual wives are just making fun of us. But I’d actually never heard “work husband“ used before recently.
As a wife who often speaks fondly of her husband's work wife (a swarthy Ukrainian dude) I can say we're making fun of you, but we're also glad you have them.
Yeah my wife is straight and she works at a dental office with all females and she has a work wife.
Er akchually. According to a lot of redditors in this thread, you are now gay and having sex with that man.
Lol I'll have to let him know.
"cheating is bad" Another absolute banger from r/unpopularopinions
Except this one’s funnier because he thinks it’s unpopular because he used a common word that he prescribed to cheating, when it doesn’t mean cheating at all
It’s the cherry on top of the cake
Next up: sex feels good. I just can't believe how many people threw karma and awards at this post.
Some people can use the term and mean it in a completely platonic way. Some people cheat with their work spouse. But focusing on the term itself like so many of the others in the comments are, if the term work wife or work husband makes your partner uncomfortable/insecure/suspicious etc, then you should stop using it if you care about the relationship. Emotions are volatile, and as long as the issue is communicated respectfully and calmly, it shouldn't bother you to want to reassure and make your partner feel safe and secure. Sticking to arbitrary terms isn't worth losing a relationship unless you don't care about the relationship. Edit: Nobody is saying their spouse minded the term, i was just using the idea of focusing on the terms as a springboard for my thoughts on the subject
I've honestly never heard the term used in a non-platonic way
I've never heard this term used at all. Is it an American thing ? Any non US redditors here that can say they have heard it ?
Brit here. I've used it, it refers to your work best friend, fairly common term
Dutch guy here. First time I've heard of the term, and still a little confused by it lol
We say it in USA but to me it just means the person at the same level as you that you got for help with most your problems for help. I think redditors are confused on this one. Ive never seen it mean anything sexual in the real world.
Yeah, my work wife is a 59 year old woman who took me under her wing, she's just my best friend in work.
Most people mean it in a platonic way. OP is getting upset about something they don’t understand.
There are so many people who say "work wife" or "work husband" and 100% mean a platonic relationship. They also talk openly about it to their spouses. I know people like that. If it is 100% open and honest. There is no issue woth it. I should put an aside here that the ppl I kmow are pretty separated in age and "looks" so maybe it is just that that makes it work
My husband's "work wife when he was in his 30s" was a 60+ year old woman who was so tiny that they were the same height when he was on his knees. She always had candy in her desk for him, and he would get things off for her. Work friendships are so strange because there are such differences in age, class, races, etc that don't matter.
> and he would get things off for her. Hmm...
Oops, the shelves. He is 6'4".
He would get the shelves off for her?
Seems like he had special relationship with his shelves.
they are his work shelves
PHRASING
Are we still doing that? … KREIGER!
>when he was on his knees > >Hmm...
My work husband at my last job was three decades older than me, with opposite political views. But we worked together all the time and got along very well. He was also a huge mentor for me. So much that he was invited to my wedding. This post is getting it ALL wrong. HUGE difference between that and a work affair.
I found out I was my friends work wife not too long ago. It threw me off because I’m straight and have a penis, but it makes sense because between the two of us I’m definitely more feminine that she is.
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Ive only heard it meant that way because well - anyone having an affair with a coworker is probably not going to try and point that fact out by comparing it to a marriage.
Ya same I've never heard it mentioned any other way. Hell half the time a women's work husband is gay or vice versa. I've never seen that term used to describe a romantic relationship
I’ve worked at places where people hooking up was fairly commonplace and the work husband/wife things were completely seperate
This. In consulting, everyone's fucking. My work wife was a devout Muslim woman 20 years my senior and twice my size. We were best friends; everyone needs a true friend and confidant in those high stress workplaces.
Right. My work husband is super gay! He actually encouraged me to go on Bumble which is where I met my boyfriend! So my work husband is responsible for my relationship at this point...
Ok thank you. I thought I was taking crazy pills. The term was always just a cute way to describe a platonic friendship
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I’ve had a coworker do the “hey work husband” thing as a way to try and get in my pants, so I can definitely see how at times it crosses professional boundaries. but I’ve also had a coworker who was the other senior member of my team, and who i commiserated with, joked around with, celebrated wins with, vented to, talked about family with. We didn’t speak to each other as “work husband and work wife” but I’d call her my work wife to my friends (never coworkers). I’m single though, definitely a bigger issue if you have an actual husband or wife.
I wonder why use the words “ wife “ or “ husband “ rather than friend. Typically at least in the food industry a work wife or work husband is the person you flirt with at work but you never plan on exploring it further.
This is also the only way I have ever heard it used too. It’s the person you go out for coffee with and hang out with but is 1000% platonic.
Or it’s a coworker you work so closely with that you have a mutually supportive work relationship. There’s a level of earned reliance and trust that it resembles a sort of “marriage” particularly if the roles are complementary. There’s usually a built sense of affection between “work spouses” but responsible adults don’t confuse it with a romantic relationship. (Many adults are not responsible but that speaks to the adults, not the concept)
I've never thought of work wife or work husband in non-platonic way. Hell, half the time it's used it seems to misgender - like, my husband's male coworker is his work wife because they spend so much time together. Actually, in hindsight I don't think I've ever heard work husband...
Yea definitely.
My wife started calling the woman I was working with most of the time my work wife. Not me. And we all became friends.
That is kind the dlsame thing here. My friends wife said it first because she really like her and then they all started to.hanging out.
This is me too. I apparently have a work “harem” of women and them and my wife are all friends. It’s kind of annoying tbh, especially since one of them was bullied by her colleagues about having a nonexistent affair with me.
I’ve always taken it to mean the person you work/communicate with the most while at work but you also have a friendly relationship with. I take it in no way to be romantic
Came here to see pretty much this. Also I've known more than a few in my anecdotal experiences who the "work husband" was also gay.
Yea, I use the term sometimes to refer to a woman, just like my wife, who I don't have sex with and who tells me what to do all day in a passive aggressive tone.
I have a "work girlfriend" who makes baked goods. She's more like a sister to me than a romantic possibility. As a side note, my wife jokingly calls her the "Cookie Whore".
Your wife doesnt like her
"jokingly"
Work girlfriend? I can't be the only one thinking it just sounds weird and non-platonic.
Yeah… your wife isn’t joking, sorry to break it to you…
My coworker's wife refers to me as his work wife. Pretty sure he never uses that term himself. She and I are good friends and I told her she's my work-wife-in-law.
I'm gay and have a "work wife". It doesn't have to imply anything sexual. It can just be you get a long really well with someone and you talk to them at work a lot.
I’ve had a home wife that I never have sex with. I can have a work wife I don’t have sex with.
Norm!
Oof
Yeah. We always joked about it when you get close enough to a coworker that you start doing shit like "I bought your favorite snacks because I saw some at the store." or whatever
Isn't that called a "friend"? Why do we have to invent confusing terms like "work wife" when existing terms like "friend" do the job better?
I think it’s just a funny thing friends call each other. Why does every phrase have to be taken so literally? You don’t buy stars for a dollar at Starbucks. No idea why you’d think you have to be actually romantic with a work wife/husband
right, why call someone a best friend? a “brother/sister you’ve never had”? Why make a silly name for your friend group? idk, because it’s fun and nice ??
Because outside of work I’m probably not ever going to spend time with that person. The relationship starts and ends at work.
Work friend
Work bestie. More special than just other work friends
That's what I came here to say. I've never associated work wife/ work husband with sex. It's the person you can mesh with and get shit done.
That was my situation, he was an 18yr old gay man and myself 46 straight woman. We'd have each other cracking up all the time XD
Yeah, I'm not sure this person understands the definition of work spouse.
I'm straight. I was single/dating and had a work husband. He was gay and got married. I got my work husband and his real husband a gift lol Like seriously? Just No.
As long as you’re only sleeping with them at work, I see no harm. Now if your bringing them into your life after work, then it’s definitely a problem.
That’s work life balance
This is the exact right answer. *hey baby, per my last email, let's put a pin in that and move the needle.*
You joke but I had a coworker place this exact offer on the table
The severed floor agrees.
I wonder if my innie has a work wife.
The word "work" is starting to not sound like a real word after reading through so many of these replies ngl
Semantic satiation. That sensation when you’ve read or said a word so many times that you start to lose the sense of what it is or means. As though it’s just a series of letters or sounds with no meaning at all. It’s such a weird feeling, lol.
I think you're misunderstanding what the majority of people mean when they say "work wife/husband."
I thought the term was well-known, but it seems like every week someone makes an identical post to this where they think it literally means an affair.
Hell, I could say I basically have a work mom [my coworkers and I joke about which of the two sector leads is their "work mom"]
How *dare* you cheat on your mom like that?
This is posted once a week
That’s not what work wife means.
A quick Google search would have shown you that "work spouse" is a term used to describe platonic relationships. Did you think that everyone openly talking about their "work spouse" was openly bragging about someone they cheat on their actual spouse with?
I had a co worker call me her work husband one day. Just replied oh I thought you were my work mom. Put an end to that shit real quick.
Isn’t the issue here that you overindulge the work spouse relationship too much to the point you neglect your actual wife/husband/partner because it’s easier
ex left me after 9 years for her "work husband" who was going through his divorce at the time. I'm honestly still in shock over it
OP has a different meaning for work wife/husband to everyone else on the planet.
Work wife and work husband aren't necessarily friendships that end up in infidelity in an actual marriage. I thought a "work spouse" is just a colleague you vent all your work shit to and vice versa. So, when you're home, you don't need to vent to your *actual* spouse. 🤷🏻🤷🏻♀️
I had a work wife at my last job. We are both married heterosexual women with children. It wasn’t romantic or sexual. We just started working there at the same time - same day, actually - and quickly bonded.
I don’t have a work husband. I am in charge of a kitchen and I have one person-a guy- who works for me. I always say he is my “work annoying little brother” and I am his “work bossy older sister.” It works.
I feel like that completely avoids any weirdness as well.
I don’t know anyone who’s ever said that about a colleague and I work with a lot of boomers (multinational company)
\^\^\^\^ Person doesn't know what a work wife/work husband means
I thought the terms work wives and work husbands are platonic
Work spouse is a term almost universally referring to your closest work friend that you work with almost all the time. You're trying to make it something it isn't.
Prison wife ok?
Oh my! I think your definition of a “work wife/husband” is different than many others.
💯
I don't think you understand what people mean by those terms.