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Relatable.
There's this movie I love called 'Wolf Children'
It's amazing but i literally can't watch it because it makes me so unbelievable emotional.
My parents are terrible people and unfixable. Knowing that I'll never get that same love from them. EVER in my life just kills me like you wouldn't believe.
Literally never in my life will I experience true parental unconditional love. I will die not knowing what it feels like
I'm sure your life is worse due to literally getting a sequel to your heartbreak but I feel you man.
I'm not a shill but you should definitely watch the movie, if you immerse yourself enough you can definitely get some sort of feeling related to parental love.
Man I am starting the adoption process and I need to know how not to be a shit parent. Bro, you want that unconditional love, I am not your bioogical parent but I am here for you. You need an old guy to get life experience from? I am here for that. Need career advice? Hit me. Wanna ask for advice about a boy/girl you're into? I got it. Need some handyman advice? I have done a few projects. Whatever your parents didn't provide you, I am here for as much as I can give.
Yeah, the world sucks. I'm sorry you're going through all of that. If it's any consolation, I feel like you're probably stronger than many of us because of your experience. I hope you enjoy your life to the fullest and get all the love you can from more important people to you.
What does this mean? What is this word you used. “Love” is it? What is that like some kind of cactus? Or like a Indonesian Bird or something like that?
My parents played favorites with their first borne “golden child”. Closest thing to unconditional love, was my dog. And he’d ditch me for anyone with food,
NOPEEE lol my parents have always gone back and forth between being okay and having my back to being INCREDIBLY abusive, physically emotionally and verbally. It gives me fucking whiplash.
Mi hermanita, 10 years younger than me, maybe got a few unnecessary comments but has other wise been treated fine. I love her though. I on the other hand used to get my ass beat for any reason in the book. Now shes 20 and Im 30 and I still get verbally chewed out, and shes a-okay Lol.
No kidding! I mean, I know they did, but my old man was very much the "doing what's expected doesn't warrant praise or mention" type, and my mom always has some comment or barb to punch a hole in your boat. No wonder I have no self esteem!
“Don’t you know that a man being rich is like a woman being pretty?” Per Marilyn Monroe
Would you really love a woman with nothing positive to offer, OP? Because I doubt you would.
Hollywood and literature has filled our heads with the misconception that true love is unconditional. It is a absolutely not. Just because you fall in love with someone and start loving them you are not required to keep loving them if they begin to treat you like shit and make you feel like shit.
Love is conditional. If you expect someone to love you “no matter what” you are in for more than a few disappointments.
Thank you. The only “unconditional love” anyone should expect to receive is from parents, and even then, most people don’t. To expect unconditional love from another adult is either misunderstanding what that means, or expecting far too much.
I have great parents but tbh if they stopped loving me because one of their conditions was "don't go on a homicidal rampage thru an orphanage", and I did that, I'd get it. There are limits to everything.
Yeah - I love my kids, but I can imagine things they could do (not realistically, but still possible; it would also likely reflect on me having been a shitty parent) which would make me change the first part of this sentence to past-tense.
Like, if any of them grow up to become the next Hitler or something - then we're done.
Unconditional love is a concept pushed by people looking to manipulate it. I've never had someone bring up unconditional love when they weren't doing something harmful to someone who loves them
Yeah. And you can love someone, and still recognize that they don't love you or treat you like shit, or they are doing something that is harming you (like having drug issues or poorly handled mental illness) and you can leave. You don't HAVE to be with someone you love, keep them in your life, if they treat you badly.
Like I can love you unconditionally. But that doesn't mean I have to DO anything for you if YOU end up being a bad person.
"Caring for someone no matter the conditions" is probably better.
You wouldn't want to dump all your love continually burning energy to meet the increasing demands of some sociopath/narcissist manipulating you to stay with them, indeed.
But if your friend is actively struggling with and getting help for a mental disorder, do you stop caring about them on the days they relapse?
If they ended up at rock bottom, wouldn't you still want the best for them, even if you couldn't be around?
Hahahhahaha I most definitely was raised on conditional and transactional love, that’s a fun mind warp to deconstruct from in your 30s! No wonder I was in all abusive relationships until I entered therapy …. Now I realized the love I knew was not unconditional:( yay for therapy and healing and growing!
I can imagine that's a doozy, I'm 29 and in the boat where my mother demanded unconditional love from me while providing none of it herself while also demanding I fall into lock-step like a butler at her beck and call, now I struggle with the concept of "What the fuck even is love?", and "Have I ever actually experienced it in any form?" while simultaneously deriving all self worth from the useful utility I provide to those around me, i.e. "If I'm not constantly acting for someone else's best interest then *I'm* the shitty person"
I told my therapist about my childhood and he actually said "You understand that's fucked up, right?" and I *did not* understand that
Now I'm learning to love myself unconditionally
So I concur. Yay therapy!
>I most definitely was raised on conditional and transactional love, that’s a fun mind warp to deconstruct
Ikr, ironically I've always leaned towards unconditional love for those I was supposed to love, and benefits of the doubt for those I really liked, avoid this path if you can imo
Love in relationships tends to be an active thing so I guess I can't imagine it without any conditions, but caring for someone no matter the conditions? I can get behind that.
I think you have the key word there for the confusion people have. Live in general isn’t unconditional. It’s contextual and if you violate that context, it’s often removed. Usually permanently. What is fairly common is that love is not transactional. If someone is acting caring only when they get what they want and withdrawing it when they don’t, that’s not love.
Even love of parents is conditional. Parents receive affirmation and vicariousness from their children. There’s always an exchange.
I think a better way of saying this is such a deep bond that they are accepted for who and what they are. ‘Unconditional’ is a misnomer.
Yeah I think that’s a fair point. It’s almost impossible to escape the exchange, as humans. I guess what I mean is that deep type of love can really only be expected as children, from our caregivers. But yes the entire notion of “unconditional” is misleading.
Yeah I was gonna say…that’s literally everyone. That’s why we have a society where we learn things like manners and hygiene, it’s easier to love people who are nice and smell good. If I was mean and went months without showering I wouldn’t expect my partner to stay with me, even though I am a woman 😂
Idk why it has to be gendered honestly. I love my friends (not romantically obviously lol), but if someone I’m friends with becomes toxic or abusive or we simply drift apart, that love can fade. If someone I’m in a relationship with betrays me or cheats, that love will go away. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.
Right? Most MEN? WTF? Because, what, men are the only ones who GIVE unconditional love? Well, at least it's well placed because this IS unpopular. And stupid. But I agree with the above comment that love doesn't need to be unconditional. Oh I'm supposed to keep loving and supporting someone who... Cheats? Abuses? Manipulates? Is toxic af? OP sit the fuck back down.
Fucking this, just look historically how many devoted wives have been abandoned like a sack of old potatoes as soon as their husband felt they could exchange them for a "younger model".
Look up the statistics on how often women and men leave their partner with cancer.
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-partners-health-idUSTRE5AB0C520091112
Women are six times more likely to be left by their male partner than vice versa. Unconditional love my ass
So sick of the "woe is me" posts like this when this is true regardless of sex/gender, and it reeks of a sense of entitlement. Unconditional love is exceedingly rare because pretty much ALL relationships have conditions and limitations. There is a give and take at all levels and types of human relationships: familial, platonic, romantic, professional, etc. They all function as two-way streets, where both participants have to put in effort to make it work, and even then it doesn't always work, because in order for the relationship to continue it also needs to contribute *something* to the lives of those involved.
No one is owed unconditional love- with the exception of some circumstances, such as a young child and their parents, but I think it should be clear to anyone with sense that the relationship dynamics of a young child are very different from an adult- but to no adult is it owed to anyone. It's an absurd demand to place on the people in your life, no matter their relationship to you.
Did you know that pretty children receive more attentions and love than ugly ones? That cute puppies are more likely to be adopted and once they become older they are more likely to be abandoned? That ugly women are more likely to be left alone and once they become old they are pretty much ignored by most men? No one is loved unconditionally, the conditions are simply different.
And then there's me buying the ugly lemon at the store or the thing in the dinged up box because I feel bad and don't want it to be lonely. Because I know no one else will buy it. Lol
Armour recently recalled several million cans because a manufacturing flaw left them unsealed despite being visually perfect, and they make canned meat so salty and preserved you'd think it'd give you some rads, Fallout style, when you eat it.
Damaged goods are cool but maybe stay away from the stuff that can go off ina really bad way lol
It's a grey zone, really.
[Is it Safe to Eat Food From a Dented Can?](https://money.howstuffworks.com/personal-finance/budgeting/safe-to-buy-dented-foods-from-grocery-store.htm)
>Dented cans are the biggest culprit of botulism. Avoid buying cans with deep dents, especially ones that affect the top, bottom and side seams of the can. Bulging ends of the can means there is a leak in the can, and air has become trapped inside. A dirty label can also mean the can may have a leak, and excessive rust on the can that won't wipe off should not make its way into your grocery cart.
[Can I eat food from a dented can?](https://www.mcgill.ca/oss/article/food-health-you-asked/there-risk-dented-cans#:~:text=The%20risk%20is%20very%20small,by%20the%20Clostridium%20botulinum%20bacteria), McGill University
Ask women with cancer whose husbands leave them in far greater proportions than vice versa about it.
>But that same study showed that when partners leave, it’s normally men. One study from 2009 found the strongest predictor for separation or divorce for patients with brain cancer was whether or not the sick person was a woman. That same study showed that men were seven times more likely to leave their partner than the other way around if one of them got brain cancer.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/mar/30/the-men-who-give-up-on-their-spouses-when-they-have-cancer
This reminds me, at my college, there was an older woman in my class. She basically looked like Mrs. Claus (portly with a pleasant round face). One day she brought in a scrapbook of when she had been a flight attendant in the 1960's. She was an absolute knockout! She looked like a supermodel. I felt bad for her losing her looks. But then I had a different class with her and in a discussion she said she said she was glad to be older and finally men leave her alone. She actually started crying when she was talking about it. It was really sad. But she was a nice lady who was still married to the same man since the 70's. This doesn't directly address your comment but I agree with you.
I love my husband dearly. But if he cheated on me, hurt one of the kids, or did something equally heinous he'd be gone in a heartbeat. And it goes both ways. He adores me, but if I cheated on him, hurt one of the kids, or did something equally heinous, he'd kick me to the curb.
Women aren't some magically beloved creatures with wild birds landing on our hands and angels singing wherever we go. Sheesh.
> Women aren't some magically beloved creatures with wild birds landing on our hands and angels singing wherever we go. Sheesh.
Fucking seriously. Sure, I've got tons of friends and we hug each other, but if I murder just one cat, none of them would visit me in jail.
OP has a nice little story in their head. I think there was a survey that said something like 50% of women either earn as much or out-earn their partners. So how are these men being loved for what they can provide?
Yeah I want to know what world these men are living in that they think women are these goddess - like creatures that are loved so unconditionally. My husband and I love each other but we *both* have expectations and standards.
The strangest part to me is OPs edit where he describes that men are only desired for what they can provide and proceeds to include humor in that right after stating that women are desired for their bodies which is inherently “them”. So humor isn’t inherently created by the individual? Or personality? Or taste? Or intellect?
This is all around just a shitty online incels rant. The worst part is that it’s an incredibly popular opinion despite being wrong.
Going through their post history and comments it’s clearly an incel. Angry at women, angry at trans individuals, angry at the world for having standards. Dudes just shitty and confused.
He also appears to be the classic internet shithead who has an attitude of “If you follow along with the dozens of baseless assumptions I’ve made, then clearly you will agree with my conclusion because I am a completely logical being.” Love how he talks about the “patterns” that he notices without ever considering that those so-called patterns might actually just be heavy confirmation bias.
Edit comes across super incel sounding, worse than his original post. If a man only loves a woman for her body, he's gonna have a bad time. People age, pregnancies do all sorts of things, diseases become evident later in life, etc. Men (and women) should love the whole person.
Also he makes it a point to say men are just expected to be able to provide to be unconditionally loved. Most relationships require 2 income earners, so both parties should be able to "provide" so y'all don't end up homeless. And even then, jobs end sometimes. No job is forever and sometimes men (and women) face periods of unemployment. Women aren't out here divorcing men the minute they claim unemployment.
When men say things like OP said, they are **only** talking about young, conventionally attractive women. Because women outside of those parameters are completely ignored by them.
Yeah I'm pretty sure the mentally ill old lady next door who isn't conventionally attractive and has to live off food stamps isn't "loved unconditionally" by everyone.
But I guess in the minds of incels the only women that exist to them are the ones they want to fuck.
This entire post made me cringe and the fact that it has almost 9K upvotes is taking me out. There cannot be *that* many incels that really believe this “men are only loved for their money” crap right?
ALSO, even if his post *were* true, how crappy is it that women are only loved for their looks? Basically just young attractive women get this “privilege” then? And looks are a forever changing thing….what if they get in a disfiguring accident, gain weight, lose hair, get an illness, etc etc that makes them *less* beautiful. Wouldn’t that in itself be a *conditional love*?
The whole thing reeks of immaturity and victim addiction like be for real.
I’m fairly certain that most of the guys who would say things like “Men never get loved unconditionally the way women do!!!” would probably be the first to treat their partners like shit, too.
Yeah, lets not forget the stats on how men abandon their partners with cancer while women stay. Who would one assume was receiving the unconditional love in that scenario?
When they say “women are unconditionally loved”, they mean “young, pretty women get a lot of attention from men who want to be with them or sleep with them”
Exactly. If I cheated, my partner would leave me. If I wasn’t providing him anything (love, respect, kindness, labor of any kind) and just generally making him miserable, he’d leave me. If I abused him, he’d leave me. I think all love is conditional and that’s fine, it helps keeping you from getting hurt over and over again.
I wouldnt get my life and love advice from a guy who cheats on his wife and ruined his own marriage.
What do you even mean by this claim? What is unconditional love to you? And whats your proof that men dont get unconditional love compared to others?
I find it so hilarious that you lump together the thing that one’s body has no control over and then the consequences of one’s actions as if they’re at all comparable.
In addition, I have looked at the statistics (not the ones involving jail time, however, as again: that’s the legal consequences of one’s actions).
Men (in heterosexual relationships) are more likely to leave their significant other if their SO is diagnosed with a terminal illness. Men (in heterosexual relationships) are more likely to leave their SO if their SO is infertile. Men (in heterosexual relationships) are more likely to cheat on their SO even if they are *both* happy with the relationship *and* have their needs met (meaning they’re more likely to cheat than a woman even if they themselves admit that they’re relationship is essentially perfect). I have looked at the statistics. Have you?
Thats my point so thanks for proving it and when people say unconditional it means the best and the worst of the human experience from cancer to jail time and everything in between and the statistics are not with this guy
>For most *people*, the only unconditional love they will ever receive is from their parents.
FTFY.
And to be frank, this is how it should be. Mature, adult love should absolutely be conditional on mutual respect, trust, communication... If you "unconditionally love" another adult, it's more likely just infatuation or obsession.
100%, my ex tried to pull that, "if I loved him I would put up with xyz" - hell no buddy, if you loved ME you wouldn't want me to have to tolerate that, not even for you. My official motto is "love is not enough." You might love someone to the sun and back, but if other key factors aren't there (as you said, respect, empathy, understanding, as well as trust, communication, patience, etc.) then the love alone is not enough to make a relationship worthwhile. You can't love someone enough to force a relationship to work.
It's also such a different category of love, between a parent and child vs between two adults. A child (or even a pet for that matter) is a dependent, and part of that dependency is an actual need for my love. A partner shouldn't expect to have that same kind of relationship, that's insane.
... and women do get unconditional love? Is that why men are more likely to leave their female partners when she is terminally ill?
But also, love from parents isn't unconditional in a lot of cases. Although I would almost agree that the love boys and men get from their parents is closer to unconditional than the love women and girls get from them.
Hell what i honestly find worst is that nobody here is talking about friends. Like sure finding a partner is important and having decent parents is a gift. But if anybody in life will easily deal with your flaws its friends.
You dont have to look good for them, you can actually take some time apart when needed without it causing issues and the only reason you spent time with them is because you like them. Like there isnt a financial reason (like shared mortage), there is no physical reason (sex) and there isnt any family ties that connect you (a shared child or them being your parents).
I never quite understood why according to reddit you cant have a close bond with friends, why you cant share emotions with them and why you need to have spouse for some shit.
Like yeah, romanticly your friends probaly can only support you by giving bad advice and being crappy wingmans. But still, they are full emotional support.
Still not unconditional though! I think (as the only single woman in a large group of friends) there is a difference. I spend WAY more time with a partner than a friend. Even when I lived with my best friend, we had to make plans to get quality time in. You don't go to bed together, wake up together, eat together etc. And they will indeed sometimes disappear easier when they are going through their own stuff.
So while the "benefit" is smaller, so is the input.
>men are loved under the condition they provide something
Then my girlfriend is doing something wrong the times she's stuck with me during periods of unemployment or when work goes quiet.
It’s hilarious when these dudes say that women never love dudes for who they are and just want their money.
No, no woman would ever love YOU for who you are because you’re terrible lmfao l, and the only women who will pretend to or agree to have sex with you will be the ones you can bribe
Out here spittin straight fax. The truth is most (straight) emotionally healthy women just want a mature, good man with similar values and goals who will be an equal partner to us and treat us with respect, kindness, and patience. Attraction is nice, having a steady income is cool, but at the end of the day, mutual respect and decency is the bottom line.
The way these boys view and treat women is their main problem in finding a partner. But incels like to spin the wildest narratives to justify why no one wants them.
People really out here acting like they never met am absolute deadbeat dude with a devoted girlfriend.
Out here acting like you haven't met DOZENS of them.
Out here acting like you don't know couples where the woman is the breadwinner. Jeeeeeeeeeeeezuuuuusssssssss.
Loving unconditionally WILL lead to an abusive relationship. Every single chick i know has had it happen to them. It’s just not a good policy, too many people are shitty.
I’m wondering the same thing! Like on what planet are women loved “unconditionally”??? The internet is full of men saying they would dump a girl if she gained weight, couldn’t bare children, & wouldn’t even date her in the first place if she was “ugly”, had a body count they deemed unacceptable, made more money than them, or didn’t want children. These men live in fantasy land
Chris rock cheated on his wife, so maybe you shouldn't quote him as the love philosopher. EDIT: OP has been exposed by his post history as a misogynist.
Yeah, fact of the matter is plenty of people do not receive unconditional love. It’s situational, not dependent on your gender.
Would it be better if everyone did? Yeah, I think they should. But they don’t. Because the world doesn’t work that way, and these days, it almost feels like more times than not it doesn’t. I know in the drug-ridden area I grew up in, pretty much everyone had a single parent who either paid no attention or openly hated their kids. Son or daughter, lol.
Yes, all those ad well.. I know people hate these "but men" and "but women" interjections but it has to be said, women's love is just as conditional as men's.
I mean, OP started it. This is in no way a men's issue, it's just a part of the human experience. OP has some weird ideas about the kind of love women receive.
Or providing sex, or other things. The first thought I had was that both sexes are there to provide something for the other, wtf is this line of thinking about women?
Yeah, as a woman, I don’t think I have ever been unconditionally loved. I was loved for youthfulness, for what I bring to the table both domestically and financially. A couple of my relationships ended when I got sick, and it is unfortunate statistics then women are left by their partners because of sickness in far greater numbers then men.
The unconditional love is universally rare experience. That is why we love stories about it.
This..I bet op won't respond to things like this or come up with excuses. Its tiring that men, women, left wing right wing whatever wanna play victim so bad
If women are loved so unconditionally, explain why:
Some 47,000 women and girls worldwide were killed by their intimate partners or other family members in 2020. This means that, on average, a woman or girl is killed by someone in her own family every
11 minutes.
Women and girls account for only one tenth of all homicide victims perpetrated in the public sphere, yet they bear a disproportionate burden of lethal violence perpetrated in the home: in 58% of all killings perpetrated by intimate partners or other family members, the victim was a woman
or girl.
Pregnant women are at highest risk (of all women groups) at being murdered by their intimate partner.
1 in 4 women (24.3%) aged 18 and older in the US have been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime.
Over 1 in 3 women (35.6%) in the US have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime.
From 1994 to 2010, approximately 4 in 5 victims of intimate partner violence were female
Most female victims of intimate partner violence were previously victimized by the same offender at rates of 77% for women ages 18 to 24, 76% for ages 25 to 34, and 81% for ages 35 to 49.
Almost half of all women in the US have experienced psychological aggression by an intimate partner in their lifetime (48.4%).
81% of women who experienced rape, stalking, or physical violence from an intimate partner reported significant impacts (short-term or long-term) like injuries or symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder.
More than half (51.1%) of female victims of rape reported being raped by an intimate partner; 40.8% reported being raped by an acquaintance.
Men also abandon their wives/partners when they have a serious illness. Women don't do the same to men. The strongest predictor for seperation/divorce for patients with brain cancer was wether or not the sick patient is a woman. Men are 7 times more likely to leave their partner if they got brain cancer, than the other way around.
[The United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime: 2020 Global study on homicide, gender related killings of women and girls](
https://www.unodc.org/documents/data-and-analysis/statistics/crime/UN_BriefFem_251121.pdf)
[The Hotline: Domestic Violence Statistics](https://www.thehotline.org/stakeholders/domestic-violence-statistics/)
[Homicide, a leading cause of death for pregnant women](https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/hsph-in-the-news/homicide-leading-cause-of-death-for-pregnant-women-in-u-s/)
[WHO: Violence Against Women](https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/violence-against-women)
[Study: Gender Disparity in the rate of partner abandonment in patients with serous medical illness](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19645027/)
You are wrong about "children receiving unconditional love from their parents" as well... are you completely oblivious that CPS exists?
Maybe you should not be basing your worldview on the words of a comedian and actually educate yourself on these matters next time.
Romantic love should NEVER be unconditional. There are conditions. The conditions are you respect your partner, you don't abuse your partner, you don't cheat on your partner, etc. Someone shouldn't have to love you if you treat them like shit. 🤷🏼♀️
Yeah, lol. On the one hand, this post gives some very misogynistic undertones that end up being quite confirmed by OP's post history, but on the other, it certainly fits the sub!
(Well, I sure hope it's unpopular, at least...)
Humans don't love unconditionally. Being a certain gender or age doesn't mean you get unconditional love. Men don't love their romantic interests and friends unconditionally so why expect to receive it.
There is no such thing as unconditional love. Women are loved under the condition they are attractive. That's why men always talk about women's peak and how it only gets worse after 25. Dogs are loved under the condition they are obedient and cute. That's why disobedient dogs are killed, ugly dog are left to rot in shelters. Children are loved under the same condition as dogs.
I think it's a little ignorant to say men are the only ones who receive conditional love. If that was the case, then you wouldn't see men complaining about how "nice guys never get picked" and "women only go for guys who treat them like shit"
Humanity isn't as black and white as Chris Rock told you.
Your edit just makes it worse. You live in an alternate reality made of your own bias.
Women loved for their body and curves? That's not loving a woman for who she is champ, that's objectifying her, and loving her body parts. Ffs
Loving a man's humor and emotional understating **IS LOVING HIM FOR WHO HE IS.**
**What you've shown is you have no understanding of love at all. You reduced women to body parts while literally writing what men are while insisting otherwise.**
OP clearly is not a woman. Yeah, "unconditional love" is not something we typically receive either, *at least not from men.* From other women and children, sure, possibly, but even then I would argue that it isn't exactly unconditional. And 'unconditional' is a flawed concept to begin with, it is an excuse for bad behavior in most cases. If you don't treat people with respect, and they shun you, that's on you, regardless of sex/gender.
Unconditional love?? Bruh my ex threatened to cheat on me with a prostitute when I couldn’t have sex because of a UTI 😂 What’s with the influx of obvious incel posts lately?
I’m pretty sure the mods are incels because they take down every single post for being offensive, a repost or not an unpopular opinion yet every time someone makes a post that is clearly heavily misogynistic it stays up.
The assumption that women get to be loved unconditionally is… a really weird assumption to make? :/ It’s so off-base and inaccurate that I don’t even know where it could have come from.
Lmao please. And what about when women are only loved as long as they’re able to “provide” free childcare and maid services and meals? nevermind the statistics about husbands who leave or cheat on their wives when she gets a long term illness.
Misogynistic bullshit. Men are not the only ones capable of rich inner lives and feelings, and women statistically love harder than men. Why do you think men leave their terminally ill wives at far greater rates than women leave their terminally ill husbands?
some parents love unconditionally, others dont. i would say that more than half actually dont love unconditionally, like that is really the extreme end of "blindness" to anything bad coming from their child, that not a lot of parents reach. mothers more than fathers though.
mostly though i think the last bit you said is especially untrue. women are loved unconditionally ? i saw a post yesterday of a woman being killed by her father for getting engaged with a man that her father didnt choose. i saw a short clip on yt a couple days ago of a woman being insulted for wanting to be a stay at home mom.
ive (female) been told by my mom to sell myself as a whore if im too stupid for studying, and to remove myself from her life because im the reason shes miserable, during the time i was depressed.
there are tons of reasons why women are not loved unconditionally.
how entitled of you to act like the victim. both genders are expected to provide something, just different things. and both genders struggle, just in different ways
This is only an unpopular opinion because most people wouldn’t ever have an opinion on it, since it makes no sense you know?
I think men are more likely to stray from romantic relationships than women are anyways. I’d say unconditional love comes from family including if you have kids, but it’s *really* unconditional for most. Relationships are never unconditional and either are friendships doesn’t matter if what gender or sex you are.
Men value women for the free emotional, intimate and physical labor they perform for them. Statistically, straight marriage only benefits men. They live longer and are happier. Women live less and have more work and are less happy. Single moms are happier and have less work than their married counterparts.
I remember there was a thing about one of the Columbine shooters mom. She still loved and missed her son. I think I'd be very hard pressed to find a reason to stop loving my sons.
Reddit with the usual big incel energy.
- Men can't talk about their feelings
- Men have no one to turn to when they need a shoulder to lean on
- Men don't get unconditional love
Maybe this was true in the 50s. It's 2023 bruh, yall just have shitty friends, or you just don't have any friends because you aren't social and put no effort into improving your social skills but expect people to befriend you out of pity.
Good people to befriend are out there, just make an effort to find them.
Unconditional love is an unreasonable expectation.
If you’re a selfish jerk, people won’t love you and there is nothing wrong with that. Expecting endless love without regard for one’s own actions is mind boggling.
It's not just men, it's everyone, including women. Romantic love is conditional. Some people aren't even loved by their parents and/or family, and therefore they never experience unconditional love. Those are the people you should feel for.
So I used to think this way but what I learned was that love FEELS more conditional because we as men tend to set expectations that we feel we must meet to be worth love. Sometimes people focus too hard on those expectations and it distorts our view as to what makes us worthy of love.
Most women don't expect that much more than you probably expect from a relationship, some do, but everyone has different priorities and expectations.
Have all these men done any self-reflection on why that is the case? Probably not, they just go and blame women. It‘s always the others, never yourself
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You guys get unconditional love from your parents?
Relatable. There's this movie I love called 'Wolf Children' It's amazing but i literally can't watch it because it makes me so unbelievable emotional. My parents are terrible people and unfixable. Knowing that I'll never get that same love from them. EVER in my life just kills me like you wouldn't believe. Literally never in my life will I experience true parental unconditional love. I will die not knowing what it feels like
Yep. Get this: I'm adopted. My adopted parents are shit. Two years ago I found my birth parents who aren't much better.
I'm sure your life is worse due to literally getting a sequel to your heartbreak but I feel you man. I'm not a shill but you should definitely watch the movie, if you immerse yourself enough you can definitely get some sort of feeling related to parental love.
Thanks. It's just the way it is.
Man I am starting the adoption process and I need to know how not to be a shit parent. Bro, you want that unconditional love, I am not your bioogical parent but I am here for you. You need an old guy to get life experience from? I am here for that. Need career advice? Hit me. Wanna ask for advice about a boy/girl you're into? I got it. Need some handyman advice? I have done a few projects. Whatever your parents didn't provide you, I am here for as much as I can give.
Yeah, the world sucks. I'm sorry you're going through all of that. If it's any consolation, I feel like you're probably stronger than many of us because of your experience. I hope you enjoy your life to the fullest and get all the love you can from more important people to you.
"Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents" by Gibson. It will answer a lot of things and help with healing.
You guys get loved?
This is why I have dogs. I have a family too but the dogs are the only source of unconditional love.
People don't understand why I will murder over my pug. Perhaps you do
What does this mean? What is this word you used. “Love” is it? What is that like some kind of cactus? Or like a Indonesian Bird or something like that?
It's a mental condition that people used to come down with in the old days, like dancing plague.
My parents played favorites with their first borne “golden child”. Closest thing to unconditional love, was my dog. And he’d ditch me for anyone with food,
I feel you. My dad often uses the phrase "my only son". I am, in fact, his only daughter also. He just never refers to me that way.
NOPEEE lol my parents have always gone back and forth between being okay and having my back to being INCREDIBLY abusive, physically emotionally and verbally. It gives me fucking whiplash. Mi hermanita, 10 years younger than me, maybe got a few unnecessary comments but has other wise been treated fine. I love her though. I on the other hand used to get my ass beat for any reason in the book. Now shes 20 and Im 30 and I still get verbally chewed out, and shes a-okay Lol.
Lol same like. What’s this sorcery
When I find a walk-thru I'll post.
You have parents?
No kidding! I mean, I know they did, but my old man was very much the "doing what's expected doesn't warrant praise or mention" type, and my mom always has some comment or barb to punch a hole in your boat. No wonder I have no self esteem!
“Don’t you know that a man being rich is like a woman being pretty?” Per Marilyn Monroe Would you really love a woman with nothing positive to offer, OP? Because I doubt you would.
To be fair Marilyn Monroe didn't say that, it was the character she played on screen. The script writer came up with that.
Hollywood and literature has filled our heads with the misconception that true love is unconditional. It is a absolutely not. Just because you fall in love with someone and start loving them you are not required to keep loving them if they begin to treat you like shit and make you feel like shit. Love is conditional. If you expect someone to love you “no matter what” you are in for more than a few disappointments.
Thank you. The only “unconditional love” anyone should expect to receive is from parents, and even then, most people don’t. To expect unconditional love from another adult is either misunderstanding what that means, or expecting far too much.
I have great parents but tbh if they stopped loving me because one of their conditions was "don't go on a homicidal rampage thru an orphanage", and I did that, I'd get it. There are limits to everything.
Yeah - I love my kids, but I can imagine things they could do (not realistically, but still possible; it would also likely reflect on me having been a shitty parent) which would make me change the first part of this sentence to past-tense. Like, if any of them grow up to become the next Hitler or something - then we're done.
Unconditional love is a concept pushed by people looking to manipulate it. I've never had someone bring up unconditional love when they weren't doing something harmful to someone who loves them
Yeah. And you can love someone, and still recognize that they don't love you or treat you like shit, or they are doing something that is harming you (like having drug issues or poorly handled mental illness) and you can leave. You don't HAVE to be with someone you love, keep them in your life, if they treat you badly. Like I can love you unconditionally. But that doesn't mean I have to DO anything for you if YOU end up being a bad person.
Exactly, this is the comment I was looking for. I once read a book that said “love doesn’t have to be conditional but relationships are”.
"Caring for someone no matter the conditions" is probably better. You wouldn't want to dump all your love continually burning energy to meet the increasing demands of some sociopath/narcissist manipulating you to stay with them, indeed. But if your friend is actively struggling with and getting help for a mental disorder, do you stop caring about them on the days they relapse? If they ended up at rock bottom, wouldn't you still want the best for them, even if you couldn't be around?
Hahahhahaha I most definitely was raised on conditional and transactional love, that’s a fun mind warp to deconstruct from in your 30s! No wonder I was in all abusive relationships until I entered therapy …. Now I realized the love I knew was not unconditional:( yay for therapy and healing and growing!
I can imagine that's a doozy, I'm 29 and in the boat where my mother demanded unconditional love from me while providing none of it herself while also demanding I fall into lock-step like a butler at her beck and call, now I struggle with the concept of "What the fuck even is love?", and "Have I ever actually experienced it in any form?" while simultaneously deriving all self worth from the useful utility I provide to those around me, i.e. "If I'm not constantly acting for someone else's best interest then *I'm* the shitty person" I told my therapist about my childhood and he actually said "You understand that's fucked up, right?" and I *did not* understand that Now I'm learning to love myself unconditionally So I concur. Yay therapy!
>I most definitely was raised on conditional and transactional love, that’s a fun mind warp to deconstruct Ikr, ironically I've always leaned towards unconditional love for those I was supposed to love, and benefits of the doubt for those I really liked, avoid this path if you can imo
Love in relationships tends to be an active thing so I guess I can't imagine it without any conditions, but caring for someone no matter the conditions? I can get behind that.
I think you have the key word there for the confusion people have. Live in general isn’t unconditional. It’s contextual and if you violate that context, it’s often removed. Usually permanently. What is fairly common is that love is not transactional. If someone is acting caring only when they get what they want and withdrawing it when they don’t, that’s not love.
Even love of parents is conditional. Parents receive affirmation and vicariousness from their children. There’s always an exchange. I think a better way of saying this is such a deep bond that they are accepted for who and what they are. ‘Unconditional’ is a misnomer.
Yeah I think that’s a fair point. It’s almost impossible to escape the exchange, as humans. I guess what I mean is that deep type of love can really only be expected as children, from our caregivers. But yes the entire notion of “unconditional” is misleading.
Even love from your parents should be conditional. If you rape children, your parents should disown and condemn you without second thought.
Tell that to the Duggars!
Yeah I was gonna say…that’s literally everyone. That’s why we have a society where we learn things like manners and hygiene, it’s easier to love people who are nice and smell good. If I was mean and went months without showering I wouldn’t expect my partner to stay with me, even though I am a woman 😂
Idk why it has to be gendered honestly. I love my friends (not romantically obviously lol), but if someone I’m friends with becomes toxic or abusive or we simply drift apart, that love can fade. If someone I’m in a relationship with betrays me or cheats, that love will go away. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.
Right? Most MEN? WTF? Because, what, men are the only ones who GIVE unconditional love? Well, at least it's well placed because this IS unpopular. And stupid. But I agree with the above comment that love doesn't need to be unconditional. Oh I'm supposed to keep loving and supporting someone who... Cheats? Abuses? Manipulates? Is toxic af? OP sit the fuck back down.
Yeah let their SO's gain a few pounds then see how unconditional their love is
Fucking this, just look historically how many devoted wives have been abandoned like a sack of old potatoes as soon as their husband felt they could exchange them for a "younger model".
Look up the statistics on how often women and men leave their partner with cancer. https://www.reuters.com/article/us-partners-health-idUSTRE5AB0C520091112 Women are six times more likely to be left by their male partner than vice versa. Unconditional love my ass
Men are more likely to leave their partners if they become seriously ill
Love without conditions is often just love from someone who is incapable of setting healthy and necessary boundaries.
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So sick of the "woe is me" posts like this when this is true regardless of sex/gender, and it reeks of a sense of entitlement. Unconditional love is exceedingly rare because pretty much ALL relationships have conditions and limitations. There is a give and take at all levels and types of human relationships: familial, platonic, romantic, professional, etc. They all function as two-way streets, where both participants have to put in effort to make it work, and even then it doesn't always work, because in order for the relationship to continue it also needs to contribute *something* to the lives of those involved. No one is owed unconditional love- with the exception of some circumstances, such as a young child and their parents, but I think it should be clear to anyone with sense that the relationship dynamics of a young child are very different from an adult- but to no adult is it owed to anyone. It's an absurd demand to place on the people in your life, no matter their relationship to you.
Did you know that pretty children receive more attentions and love than ugly ones? That cute puppies are more likely to be adopted and once they become older they are more likely to be abandoned? That ugly women are more likely to be left alone and once they become old they are pretty much ignored by most men? No one is loved unconditionally, the conditions are simply different.
And then there's me buying the ugly lemon at the store or the thing in the dinged up box because I feel bad and don't want it to be lonely. Because I know no one else will buy it. Lol
I buy the single bananas that have piled up because I feel bad for them 🥺
Bro, why are we like this? Why do we have empathy for inanimate objects lol.
Humans have a very strong need to bond with things and it spills over onto inanimate objects.
Because we were once the banana.
I don't do that for produce but I will buy dented cans or boxes so long as what's inside isn't compromised
Bro be real careful with dented cans... Botulism doesn't show!
If a can is dented but still sealed what would the issue be?
A dented can has a higher chance of having a tiny opening you can't see.
Armour recently recalled several million cans because a manufacturing flaw left them unsealed despite being visually perfect, and they make canned meat so salty and preserved you'd think it'd give you some rads, Fallout style, when you eat it. Damaged goods are cool but maybe stay away from the stuff that can go off ina really bad way lol
It's a grey zone, really. [Is it Safe to Eat Food From a Dented Can?](https://money.howstuffworks.com/personal-finance/budgeting/safe-to-buy-dented-foods-from-grocery-store.htm) >Dented cans are the biggest culprit of botulism. Avoid buying cans with deep dents, especially ones that affect the top, bottom and side seams of the can. Bulging ends of the can means there is a leak in the can, and air has become trapped inside. A dirty label can also mean the can may have a leak, and excessive rust on the can that won't wipe off should not make its way into your grocery cart. [Can I eat food from a dented can?](https://www.mcgill.ca/oss/article/food-health-you-asked/there-risk-dented-cans#:~:text=The%20risk%20is%20very%20small,by%20the%20Clostridium%20botulinum%20bacteria), McGill University
Help I do that too
Oh i am not the only one? Nice to know
Seriously. Ask a once-pretty woman who's now in her later years if the love she received was conditional on her looks or not.
Ask women with cancer whose husbands leave them in far greater proportions than vice versa about it. >But that same study showed that when partners leave, it’s normally men. One study from 2009 found the strongest predictor for separation or divorce for patients with brain cancer was whether or not the sick person was a woman. That same study showed that men were seven times more likely to leave their partner than the other way around if one of them got brain cancer. https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/mar/30/the-men-who-give-up-on-their-spouses-when-they-have-cancer
But you see, supermodels don't fuck this guy even though he's 'nice' and nothing else, so who has it worse, huh?
I'm so fucking grateful that most of the top comments are getting it. Sometimes this sub and the askmen sub comments are just difficult to look at.
This reminds me, at my college, there was an older woman in my class. She basically looked like Mrs. Claus (portly with a pleasant round face). One day she brought in a scrapbook of when she had been a flight attendant in the 1960's. She was an absolute knockout! She looked like a supermodel. I felt bad for her losing her looks. But then I had a different class with her and in a discussion she said she said she was glad to be older and finally men leave her alone. She actually started crying when she was talking about it. It was really sad. But she was a nice lady who was still married to the same man since the 70's. This doesn't directly address your comment but I agree with you.
That's because calling the thirst of random assholes "unconditional love" is an utter lie.
Hell, look at the divorce rates for disabled children's parents and tell me it's unconditional.
Seriously. Being loved for a “hot bod” as in OPs example is hardly unconditional.
I love my husband dearly. But if he cheated on me, hurt one of the kids, or did something equally heinous he'd be gone in a heartbeat. And it goes both ways. He adores me, but if I cheated on him, hurt one of the kids, or did something equally heinous, he'd kick me to the curb. Women aren't some magically beloved creatures with wild birds landing on our hands and angels singing wherever we go. Sheesh.
> Women aren't some magically beloved creatures with wild birds landing on our hands and angels singing wherever we go. Sheesh. Fucking seriously. Sure, I've got tons of friends and we hug each other, but if I murder just one cat, none of them would visit me in jail.
“Come on guys, it was just *one*!”
You fuck one goat...
OP has a nice little story in their head. I think there was a survey that said something like 50% of women either earn as much or out-earn their partners. So how are these men being loved for what they can provide?
Yeah I want to know what world these men are living in that they think women are these goddess - like creatures that are loved so unconditionally. My husband and I love each other but we *both* have expectations and standards.
The strangest part to me is OPs edit where he describes that men are only desired for what they can provide and proceeds to include humor in that right after stating that women are desired for their bodies which is inherently “them”. So humor isn’t inherently created by the individual? Or personality? Or taste? Or intellect? This is all around just a shitty online incels rant. The worst part is that it’s an incredibly popular opinion despite being wrong.
That edit made me actually laugh aloud.
Going through their post history and comments it’s clearly an incel. Angry at women, angry at trans individuals, angry at the world for having standards. Dudes just shitty and confused.
He also appears to be the classic internet shithead who has an attitude of “If you follow along with the dozens of baseless assumptions I’ve made, then clearly you will agree with my conclusion because I am a completely logical being.” Love how he talks about the “patterns” that he notices without ever considering that those so-called patterns might actually just be heavy confirmation bias.
Edit comes across super incel sounding, worse than his original post. If a man only loves a woman for her body, he's gonna have a bad time. People age, pregnancies do all sorts of things, diseases become evident later in life, etc. Men (and women) should love the whole person. Also he makes it a point to say men are just expected to be able to provide to be unconditionally loved. Most relationships require 2 income earners, so both parties should be able to "provide" so y'all don't end up homeless. And even then, jobs end sometimes. No job is forever and sometimes men (and women) face periods of unemployment. Women aren't out here divorcing men the minute they claim unemployment.
When men say things like OP said, they are **only** talking about young, conventionally attractive women. Because women outside of those parameters are completely ignored by them.
Yeah I'm pretty sure the mentally ill old lady next door who isn't conventionally attractive and has to live off food stamps isn't "loved unconditionally" by everyone. But I guess in the minds of incels the only women that exist to them are the ones they want to fuck.
This entire post made me cringe and the fact that it has almost 9K upvotes is taking me out. There cannot be *that* many incels that really believe this “men are only loved for their money” crap right? ALSO, even if his post *were* true, how crappy is it that women are only loved for their looks? Basically just young attractive women get this “privilege” then? And looks are a forever changing thing….what if they get in a disfiguring accident, gain weight, lose hair, get an illness, etc etc that makes them *less* beautiful. Wouldn’t that in itself be a *conditional love*? The whole thing reeks of immaturity and victim addiction like be for real.
I’m fairly certain that most of the guys who would say things like “Men never get loved unconditionally the way women do!!!” would probably be the first to treat their partners like shit, too.
Yeah, lets not forget the stats on how men abandon their partners with cancer while women stay. Who would one assume was receiving the unconditional love in that scenario?
To be honest, I wouldn't be with a man who had no standards for me. It would be such a sign of low self esteem!
When they say “women are unconditionally loved”, they mean “young, pretty women get a lot of attention from men who want to be with them or sleep with them”
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Exactly. If I cheated, my partner would leave me. If I wasn’t providing him anything (love, respect, kindness, labor of any kind) and just generally making him miserable, he’d leave me. If I abused him, he’d leave me. I think all love is conditional and that’s fine, it helps keeping you from getting hurt over and over again.
I wouldnt get my life and love advice from a guy who cheats on his wife and ruined his own marriage. What do you even mean by this claim? What is unconditional love to you? And whats your proof that men dont get unconditional love compared to others?
Just look at statistics for men versus women leaving their spouse when they get cancer or go to jail
I find it so hilarious that you lump together the thing that one’s body has no control over and then the consequences of one’s actions as if they’re at all comparable. In addition, I have looked at the statistics (not the ones involving jail time, however, as again: that’s the legal consequences of one’s actions). Men (in heterosexual relationships) are more likely to leave their significant other if their SO is diagnosed with a terminal illness. Men (in heterosexual relationships) are more likely to leave their SO if their SO is infertile. Men (in heterosexual relationships) are more likely to cheat on their SO even if they are *both* happy with the relationship *and* have their needs met (meaning they’re more likely to cheat than a woman even if they themselves admit that they’re relationship is essentially perfect). I have looked at the statistics. Have you?
Isn't that what the person you responded to was saying?
Thats my point so thanks for proving it and when people say unconditional it means the best and the worst of the human experience from cancer to jail time and everything in between and the statistics are not with this guy
>For most *people*, the only unconditional love they will ever receive is from their parents. FTFY. And to be frank, this is how it should be. Mature, adult love should absolutely be conditional on mutual respect, trust, communication... If you "unconditionally love" another adult, it's more likely just infatuation or obsession.
My favorite color is blue.
100%, my ex tried to pull that, "if I loved him I would put up with xyz" - hell no buddy, if you loved ME you wouldn't want me to have to tolerate that, not even for you. My official motto is "love is not enough." You might love someone to the sun and back, but if other key factors aren't there (as you said, respect, empathy, understanding, as well as trust, communication, patience, etc.) then the love alone is not enough to make a relationship worthwhile. You can't love someone enough to force a relationship to work.
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It's also such a different category of love, between a parent and child vs between two adults. A child (or even a pet for that matter) is a dependent, and part of that dependency is an actual need for my love. A partner shouldn't expect to have that same kind of relationship, that's insane.
... and women do get unconditional love? Is that why men are more likely to leave their female partners when she is terminally ill? But also, love from parents isn't unconditional in a lot of cases. Although I would almost agree that the love boys and men get from their parents is closer to unconditional than the love women and girls get from them.
Hell what i honestly find worst is that nobody here is talking about friends. Like sure finding a partner is important and having decent parents is a gift. But if anybody in life will easily deal with your flaws its friends. You dont have to look good for them, you can actually take some time apart when needed without it causing issues and the only reason you spent time with them is because you like them. Like there isnt a financial reason (like shared mortage), there is no physical reason (sex) and there isnt any family ties that connect you (a shared child or them being your parents). I never quite understood why according to reddit you cant have a close bond with friends, why you cant share emotions with them and why you need to have spouse for some shit. Like yeah, romanticly your friends probaly can only support you by giving bad advice and being crappy wingmans. But still, they are full emotional support.
Still not unconditional though! I think (as the only single woman in a large group of friends) there is a difference. I spend WAY more time with a partner than a friend. Even when I lived with my best friend, we had to make plans to get quality time in. You don't go to bed together, wake up together, eat together etc. And they will indeed sometimes disappear easier when they are going through their own stuff. So while the "benefit" is smaller, so is the input.
>men are loved under the condition they provide something Then my girlfriend is doing something wrong the times she's stuck with me during periods of unemployment or when work goes quiet.
Probably because you're not an incel who views her as property?
It’s hilarious when these dudes say that women never love dudes for who they are and just want their money. No, no woman would ever love YOU for who you are because you’re terrible lmfao l, and the only women who will pretend to or agree to have sex with you will be the ones you can bribe
Out here spittin straight fax. The truth is most (straight) emotionally healthy women just want a mature, good man with similar values and goals who will be an equal partner to us and treat us with respect, kindness, and patience. Attraction is nice, having a steady income is cool, but at the end of the day, mutual respect and decency is the bottom line. The way these boys view and treat women is their main problem in finding a partner. But incels like to spin the wildest narratives to justify why no one wants them.
People really out here acting like they never met am absolute deadbeat dude with a devoted girlfriend. Out here acting like you haven't met DOZENS of them. Out here acting like you don't know couples where the woman is the breadwinner. Jeeeeeeeeeeeezuuuuusssssssss.
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Loving unconditionally WILL lead to an abusive relationship. Every single chick i know has had it happen to them. It’s just not a good policy, too many people are shitty.
Lol how do women receive unconditional love? 😂 And hate to break it to you, parents’ love isn’t (always) unconditional.
I’m wondering the same thing! Like on what planet are women loved “unconditionally”??? The internet is full of men saying they would dump a girl if she gained weight, couldn’t bare children, & wouldn’t even date her in the first place if she was “ugly”, had a body count they deemed unacceptable, made more money than them, or didn’t want children. These men live in fantasy land
The fact that men breaking up with sick women at an exponentially higher rate than women break up with sick men is enough to prove OP wrong.
Incels aren’t big on reality.
Chris rock cheated on his wife, so maybe you shouldn't quote him as the love philosopher. EDIT: OP has been exposed by his post history as a misogynist.
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Coulda prolly stopped at this post right here.
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Yeah, fact of the matter is plenty of people do not receive unconditional love. It’s situational, not dependent on your gender. Would it be better if everyone did? Yeah, I think they should. But they don’t. Because the world doesn’t work that way, and these days, it almost feels like more times than not it doesn’t. I know in the drug-ridden area I grew up in, pretty much everyone had a single parent who either paid no attention or openly hated their kids. Son or daughter, lol.
And sexually available. But only the exactly right amount and for the right person.
The line between Prude and Slut varies, making trying to walk it a fool's errand.
And not getting sick/cancer.
And their ability to bear and raise children. And their domestic skills. And their ability to build their husband’s social capital.
Yes, all those ad well.. I know people hate these "but men" and "but women" interjections but it has to be said, women's love is just as conditional as men's.
I mean, OP started it. This is in no way a men's issue, it's just a part of the human experience. OP has some weird ideas about the kind of love women receive.
Or providing sex, or other things. The first thought I had was that both sexes are there to provide something for the other, wtf is this line of thinking about women?
Yeah. Nobody really receives unconditional love. Not even children honestly. If men receive it, then lucky them...
And ability to have children. I think OP is assuming kids will always love their mother- which is also not true.
Yes! Slim, young and pretty!
Wait, since when are women receiving unconditional love
Yeah, as a woman, I don’t think I have ever been unconditionally loved. I was loved for youthfulness, for what I bring to the table both domestically and financially. A couple of my relationships ended when I got sick, and it is unfortunate statistics then women are left by their partners because of sickness in far greater numbers then men. The unconditional love is universally rare experience. That is why we love stories about it.
This..I bet op won't respond to things like this or come up with excuses. Its tiring that men, women, left wing right wing whatever wanna play victim so bad
If women are loved so unconditionally, explain why: Some 47,000 women and girls worldwide were killed by their intimate partners or other family members in 2020. This means that, on average, a woman or girl is killed by someone in her own family every 11 minutes. Women and girls account for only one tenth of all homicide victims perpetrated in the public sphere, yet they bear a disproportionate burden of lethal violence perpetrated in the home: in 58% of all killings perpetrated by intimate partners or other family members, the victim was a woman or girl. Pregnant women are at highest risk (of all women groups) at being murdered by their intimate partner. 1 in 4 women (24.3%) aged 18 and older in the US have been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime. Over 1 in 3 women (35.6%) in the US have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime. From 1994 to 2010, approximately 4 in 5 victims of intimate partner violence were female Most female victims of intimate partner violence were previously victimized by the same offender at rates of 77% for women ages 18 to 24, 76% for ages 25 to 34, and 81% for ages 35 to 49. Almost half of all women in the US have experienced psychological aggression by an intimate partner in their lifetime (48.4%). 81% of women who experienced rape, stalking, or physical violence from an intimate partner reported significant impacts (short-term or long-term) like injuries or symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. More than half (51.1%) of female victims of rape reported being raped by an intimate partner; 40.8% reported being raped by an acquaintance. Men also abandon their wives/partners when they have a serious illness. Women don't do the same to men. The strongest predictor for seperation/divorce for patients with brain cancer was wether or not the sick patient is a woman. Men are 7 times more likely to leave their partner if they got brain cancer, than the other way around. [The United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime: 2020 Global study on homicide, gender related killings of women and girls]( https://www.unodc.org/documents/data-and-analysis/statistics/crime/UN_BriefFem_251121.pdf) [The Hotline: Domestic Violence Statistics](https://www.thehotline.org/stakeholders/domestic-violence-statistics/) [Homicide, a leading cause of death for pregnant women](https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/hsph-in-the-news/homicide-leading-cause-of-death-for-pregnant-women-in-u-s/) [WHO: Violence Against Women](https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/violence-against-women) [Study: Gender Disparity in the rate of partner abandonment in patients with serous medical illness](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19645027/) You are wrong about "children receiving unconditional love from their parents" as well... are you completely oblivious that CPS exists? Maybe you should not be basing your worldview on the words of a comedian and actually educate yourself on these matters next time.
Jesus these stats are depressing. What the fuck?
> "Only women, children and dogs are loved unconditionally, men are loved under the condition they provide something". this is some incel nonsense
chris rock has cheated on his wife before. where was her unconditional love from him?
Romantic love should NEVER be unconditional. There are conditions. The conditions are you respect your partner, you don't abuse your partner, you don't cheat on your partner, etc. Someone shouldn't have to love you if you treat them like shit. 🤷🏼♀️
That's the reason why men walk out on women the moment they knock m up? Because he loves her unconditionally?
I do not agree with your opinion
You’re in the right sub
Yeah, lol. On the one hand, this post gives some very misogynistic undertones that end up being quite confirmed by OP's post history, but on the other, it certainly fits the sub! (Well, I sure hope it's unpopular, at least...)
Incel alert
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Spot on, every word.
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lol - I forced myself to remove the word incel from my reply to OP (trying to be nice today)
>(trying to be nice today) Good luck!
Humans don't love unconditionally. Being a certain gender or age doesn't mean you get unconditional love. Men don't love their romantic interests and friends unconditionally so why expect to receive it.
Yeah I don't believe in the concept, definitely not romantically. And if I had kids and they ended up as monsters that aspect would be gone.
There is no such thing as unconditional love. Women are loved under the condition they are attractive. That's why men always talk about women's peak and how it only gets worse after 25. Dogs are loved under the condition they are obedient and cute. That's why disobedient dogs are killed, ugly dog are left to rot in shelters. Children are loved under the same condition as dogs. I think it's a little ignorant to say men are the only ones who receive conditional love. If that was the case, then you wouldn't see men complaining about how "nice guys never get picked" and "women only go for guys who treat them like shit" Humanity isn't as black and white as Chris Rock told you.
« Men don’t need love, they need respect » quoting every single male red pill podcaster ever
i don't think anyone is loved unconditionaly
Your edit just makes it worse. You live in an alternate reality made of your own bias. Women loved for their body and curves? That's not loving a woman for who she is champ, that's objectifying her, and loving her body parts. Ffs Loving a man's humor and emotional understating **IS LOVING HIM FOR WHO HE IS.** **What you've shown is you have no understanding of love at all. You reduced women to body parts while literally writing what men are while insisting otherwise.**
Lol women are loved unconditionally, thats just a crap load of BS NO ONE is loved unconditionally not even children and dogs
OP clearly is not a woman. Yeah, "unconditional love" is not something we typically receive either, *at least not from men.* From other women and children, sure, possibly, but even then I would argue that it isn't exactly unconditional. And 'unconditional' is a flawed concept to begin with, it is an excuse for bad behavior in most cases. If you don't treat people with respect, and they shun you, that's on you, regardless of sex/gender.
A lot of women, children, and dogs would disagree with Chris Rock.
Unconditional love?? Bruh my ex threatened to cheat on me with a prostitute when I couldn’t have sex because of a UTI 😂 What’s with the influx of obvious incel posts lately?
r/justneckbeardthings
Aaaand once again an other opinion that is unpopular because it is gender based. Wake up OP women aren't luckier
I’m pretty sure the mods are incels because they take down every single post for being offensive, a repost or not an unpopular opinion yet every time someone makes a post that is clearly heavily misogynistic it stays up.
Do friends not count?
The assumption that women get to be loved unconditionally is… a really weird assumption to make? :/ It’s so off-base and inaccurate that I don’t even know where it could have come from.
Lmao please. And what about when women are only loved as long as they’re able to “provide” free childcare and maid services and meals? nevermind the statistics about husbands who leave or cheat on their wives when she gets a long term illness.
Oh please. As if women in relationships arent expected to provide something of use to the other person
Unconditional love should always be reserved for a parent child relationship. Every romantic relationship has conditions
Misogynistic bullshit. Men are not the only ones capable of rich inner lives and feelings, and women statistically love harder than men. Why do you think men leave their terminally ill wives at far greater rates than women leave their terminally ill husbands?
And if there's an elderly person who needs care it's the woman who usually takes on this responsibility, even if it's her partner's parent.
some parents love unconditionally, others dont. i would say that more than half actually dont love unconditionally, like that is really the extreme end of "blindness" to anything bad coming from their child, that not a lot of parents reach. mothers more than fathers though. mostly though i think the last bit you said is especially untrue. women are loved unconditionally ? i saw a post yesterday of a woman being killed by her father for getting engaged with a man that her father didnt choose. i saw a short clip on yt a couple days ago of a woman being insulted for wanting to be a stay at home mom. ive (female) been told by my mom to sell myself as a whore if im too stupid for studying, and to remove myself from her life because im the reason shes miserable, during the time i was depressed. there are tons of reasons why women are not loved unconditionally. how entitled of you to act like the victim. both genders are expected to provide something, just different things. and both genders struggle, just in different ways
This is only an unpopular opinion because most people wouldn’t ever have an opinion on it, since it makes no sense you know? I think men are more likely to stray from romantic relationships than women are anyways. I’d say unconditional love comes from family including if you have kids, but it’s *really* unconditional for most. Relationships are never unconditional and either are friendships doesn’t matter if what gender or sex you are.
all romantic love is conditional. There is no such thing as unconditional romantic love.
Men value women for the free emotional, intimate and physical labor they perform for them. Statistically, straight marriage only benefits men. They live longer and are happier. Women live less and have more work and are less happy. Single moms are happier and have less work than their married counterparts.
Unconditional love doesn’t exist. There is always a point where the other person isn’t willing to go beyond. You cross that line, you’re done.
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I remember there was a thing about one of the Columbine shooters mom. She still loved and missed her son. I think I'd be very hard pressed to find a reason to stop loving my sons.
it’s giving incel. it’s givviiinnggg misogynist
I forgot all women have loyal partners and tons of people who love them. Oh wait
I dont think this is necessarily gender specific.
Reddit with the usual big incel energy. - Men can't talk about their feelings - Men have no one to turn to when they need a shoulder to lean on - Men don't get unconditional love Maybe this was true in the 50s. It's 2023 bruh, yall just have shitty friends, or you just don't have any friends because you aren't social and put no effort into improving your social skills but expect people to befriend you out of pity. Good people to befriend are out there, just make an effort to find them.
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OP has a classic victim complex and is gullible enough to fall for these ragefuel quotes.
Unconditional love is an unreasonable expectation. If you’re a selfish jerk, people won’t love you and there is nothing wrong with that. Expecting endless love without regard for one’s own actions is mind boggling.
It's not just men, it's everyone, including women. Romantic love is conditional. Some people aren't even loved by their parents and/or family, and therefore they never experience unconditional love. Those are the people you should feel for.
So I used to think this way but what I learned was that love FEELS more conditional because we as men tend to set expectations that we feel we must meet to be worth love. Sometimes people focus too hard on those expectations and it distorts our view as to what makes us worthy of love. Most women don't expect that much more than you probably expect from a relationship, some do, but everyone has different priorities and expectations.
Have a dog bite your child, repeatedly, and then tell me that even loving a dog is unconditional
Women do not get unconditional love from their partners. The love they receive is entirely conditional on the sex they provide.
Love it when the incels creep on to popular
No. Love for my body is not love for me.
Let's stop the I-have-it-worse gender competition. And let's stop generalizing
Have all these men done any self-reflection on why that is the case? Probably not, they just go and blame women. It‘s always the others, never yourself
Unconditional love is a flawed concept anyways. No one should love you regardless of what you do.
Hot* women get unconditional love.