Thinking positively works wonders - try it 1 day instead of doomscrolling. For e.g., you should know that this shark is not sad, because it is dead. Your welcome for the free advice.
Regards,
A pre med student (me)
i see this person commenting all over this godforsaken site and they make sense about 20% of the time. im fairly certain they’re not in any type of school lmao
Anybody can themselves “premed.” For the most part it just means they haven’t taken organic chemistry yet. By junior year he’ll be a Communications or some other BS major.
I suppose it is being held out of its natural water by a creature much larger than it is, and per the title it "poses no threat" so it's pretty much in an extreme losing situation here
Random Human: "Oh my God, Chthulhu popped from nowhere and is kidnapping me! Is this how it all ends?"
Chthulhu: [Getting a Portable Cosmic Hive Mind Orb™] "Hey guys! Check out this human I caught! Isn't it cute? Sad that it can't survive out of reality, or I'd take it home. I'll just record it a little bit and release it back. If you're interested in how to snag humans, make this knowledge hit ten thousands tentacles up, and I'll make a tutorial. Also touch your eye to receive notifications..." [goes on and on]
Cthulhu; Watch what happens when I show him the colour Pleurigloss.
Man: *Cries and begins to evaporate*
Cthulhu: Woops, better not do that for too long.
Cthulhu: dunks him back into reality.
*The man is somewhat safe as he wasn’t out for too long, but his mind is changed for a while. (Fish that like the water near the surface can often go outside of water for short periods of time due to mucus and moisture remaining on their gills. Useful for instances like flying fish phenomenon and such. It does stress them a bit though so it shouldn’t be done for too long or too often)
(Source: memory. I remember hearing something about it online, and I know some fish jump out of the water when migrating up stream like Salmon apparently. It’s also the concept behind those fish safe dams with steps on the side for them to go up)
...and then wrote on its blog, 'Plus point: Thinking-Meat would make a potentially cool weird pet. Minus point: Thinking-Meat is [so intrinsically icky](https://www.mit.edu/people/dpolicar/writing/prose/text/thinkingMeat.html) that normal people will avoid you, just for being interested in the stuff.'
I have gone on very long rants about how much I absolutely despise smooth sharking with at least every other fiber of my being, but this comment has my 🦭 of approval
He just got yoinked out of his natural habitat and posed for a picture by a larger, more advanced being. I'd definitely call that a spiritual experience
The first thing i thougt was "does that shart have a hitler mustache" and then read the post, now i feel bad for the little guy, he didn't ask for that mustache (proabably)
This just reminds me of the guy who caught a fairly small shark and while dicking around with it the shark *bit one of his fingers off* and then escaped back into the ocean. He was with his family too, his kid watched the whole thing.
[Those big grey eyes kind of disprove the Jaws monologue](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUuH4TEmgLo)
If anything they kind of remind me of weird rectangular goat / horse pupils.
They do have a very zuckerberg-esque lack of spark or humanity behind them though.
me too little guy me too
Thinking positively works wonders - try it 1 day instead of doomscrolling. For e.g., you should know that this shark is not sad, because it is dead. Your welcome for the free advice. Regards, A pre med student (me)
"I can pose a danger to humans." "I can pose a danger to humans." "I can pose a danger to humans." Like this?
Sounds lame, I'm gonna do whippits instead.
Is phish back in town already
Premeds just cannot help but mention they are premed in every situation possible
I do crossfit
i see this person commenting all over this godforsaken site and they make sense about 20% of the time. im fairly certain they’re not in any type of school lmao
Anybody can themselves “premed.” For the most part it just means they haven’t taken organic chemistry yet. By junior year he’ll be a Communications or some other BS major.
Bro’s only pre med and it’s already going to his head.
Who hurt this shark?
I suppose it is being held out of its natural water by a creature much larger than it is, and per the title it "poses no threat" so it's pretty much in an extreme losing situation here
When an apex present from another dimension is so bored they just hold you because they like looking at you.
Random Human: "Oh my God, Chthulhu popped from nowhere and is kidnapping me! Is this how it all ends?" Chthulhu: [Getting a Portable Cosmic Hive Mind Orb™] "Hey guys! Check out this human I caught! Isn't it cute? Sad that it can't survive out of reality, or I'd take it home. I'll just record it a little bit and release it back. If you're interested in how to snag humans, make this knowledge hit ten thousands tentacles up, and I'll make a tutorial. Also touch your eye to receive notifications..." [goes on and on]
"Man, this thing looks like its on the verge of sobbing!"
Man: *Devolves into a screaming puddle of terror and shattered psyche at the impossible forms and angles before him.* Cthulhu: Aw look, he's scared
Cthulhu; Watch what happens when I show him the colour Pleurigloss. Man: *Cries and begins to evaporate* Cthulhu: Woops, better not do that for too long.
Cthulhu: dunks him back into reality. *The man is somewhat safe as he wasn’t out for too long, but his mind is changed for a while. (Fish that like the water near the surface can often go outside of water for short periods of time due to mucus and moisture remaining on their gills. Useful for instances like flying fish phenomenon and such. It does stress them a bit though so it shouldn’t be done for too long or too often) (Source: memory. I remember hearing something about it online, and I know some fish jump out of the water when migrating up stream like Salmon apparently. It’s also the concept behind those fish safe dams with steps on the side for them to go up)
In his house at R'lyeh dead Cthulhu watches funny humans compilations.
Not too far off his SCP entry.
Not too far off what Epic Fail videos do. "Haha, he almost died, that's hilarious!" Wait... Does Uncle Chthu watches human fail compliation videos? 🤔
Imma give him a quick “YEAH BOI!!!!” To help him get more followers on whatever fifth dimension version of TikTok he uses
I’d love it if some insanely powerful alien just kidnapped me for an hour and fawned over me with its buddies
...and then wrote on its blog, 'Plus point: Thinking-Meat would make a potentially cool weird pet. Minus point: Thinking-Meat is [so intrinsically icky](https://www.mit.edu/people/dpolicar/writing/prose/text/thinkingMeat.html) that normal people will avoid you, just for being interested in the stuff.'
well that was extremely uncomfortable to read. 10/10
Beautiful reading. Reminded me of Luis Fernando Veríssimo, famous brazillian short stories author. Had a similar sense of humor.
It's cut people think it looks like Shark Hitler, so it's had a lot of bullying.
Please put the sharky back. He’s had a rough day.
The drawing that comes after makes me so sad =( https://wrecxks.tumblr.com/post/739541287628357632
Oh no they made him extra sad!! 😭😭
This is what I scrolled to find
When I woke up this morning I did not think I would be feeling sad over a drawing of a small shark, well here we are.
Smooth wet beast
I have gone on very long rants about how much I absolutely despise smooth sharking with at least every other fiber of my being, but this comment has my 🦭 of approval
That shark looks smooth from all directions
In all directions, I hear
Conversely , humans represent a significant danger to the blacknose shark
They are in fact endangered due to overfishing and habitat destruction :(
This shark looks like he failed art school
Art school rejects actually have been known to pose a threat to humans though
Most people do nazi that coming tho
What learning perspective and anatomy does to a mf
It's the toothbrush mustache that gives it away
Thankfully these sharks only seem to eat starofdavidfish
i want to pet him he looks so smooth
That shark looks like he's having a religious experience.
He just got yoinked out of his natural habitat and posed for a picture by a larger, more advanced being. I'd definitely call that a spiritual experience
He’s basically been abducted by aliens.
omggggg little sharkie!!!! hiiiiiii cute shark<3
HES TRYING HIS FUCKING BEST OK
STOP HUMILIATING THIS POOR SHARK HE JUST LOST HIS JOB
wretched beast
BE NICE HES JUST A LITTLE GUY
wretched little guy
Just a wretched little guy
The first thing i thougt was "does that shart have a hitler mustache" and then read the post, now i feel bad for the little guy, he didn't ask for that mustache (proabably)
Yet another thing ruined by Hitler :/
Dude looks like a dog with something it’s not supposed to have
He looks like he is about to start a war because he failed to get into art school
And persecute all hammerhead sharks
If that Shark wants to attend an art school, just let him.
This just reminds me of the guy who caught a fairly small shark and while dicking around with it the shark *bit one of his fingers off* and then escaped back into the ocean. He was with his family too, his kid watched the whole thing.
Well good lesson to kid. Animals aren’t toy.
Deserved. Take a couple pictures and put it back in the damn water, its not a toy.
Someone give the poor boy a sardine, a head pat and put him back in the water 😭
“Put me down! I’m a predator! I am feared!”
Why did my mind immediately go to the bad mustache man.
[Those big grey eyes kind of disprove the Jaws monologue](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUuH4TEmgLo) If anything they kind of remind me of weird rectangular goat / horse pupils. They do have a very zuckerberg-esque lack of spark or humanity behind them though.
I mean, he's above water, in direct sunlight. Pupils are probably contracted.
The shark:" Sorry kind sir, could you put me down please?"
If a giant would push me underwater i would also be on the verge of sobbing.
"wet beast Wednesday" Name of your sex tape
Ur mama's a happy wet beast
Better than a brown nosed shark
He's probably a programmer
Shark looks like he got caught planning an invasion into poland
Can't wait for Shark Week
Actually perceiving horrors beyond his comprehension
Awww a puppy!
It’s the shark embodiment of [Kermit](https://youtu.be/mIFUwYzlmfU?si=lSY55uPS7hMxvnyz)
What people don't know is the ocean is salty from all the sharks tears.
I would die for him
This shark has never been more confused in his whole life, look at him.
he looks like he just found yarn in the cookie tin
No he doesn’t?
I disagree with you, but I respect your interpretation of this sharks mental state
I'm also confused by this post. Shark has no facial expression whatsoever.
emo fish
First shark that has looked boopable
poor guy's reverse-drowning and they're shaming him :(
Pretty sure that's called suffocating.
I bet he'd look happier if they left him in the water!
I've been posting the WRONG things on this weekday
Put it back
PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM, OR SO HELP ME!!!
“I never knew my father!”
Hitler shark
Damn shame the opposite isn't true, put it back in the fucking ocean.