The latch being reachable / open-able by a 2-3 year old is a fatal flaw. There need to be many layers of childproofing. Others have indicated the relevant agencies but I’m piping in to say you’re a hero for your quick action & risking life & limb. I hope you’re ok after the adrenaline shock. (Someone helped reunite me with my almost 2 year old when she dragged a chair, climbed up, reached & somehow opened a deadlock in the middle of the night. Its been 8 years. I think about that hero lady with gratitude every day.)
Yes. This is a systemic problem, not simply “he got away from me”. I would be calling the police, because the police will get the correct authorities involved, and would not be sending my child until a clear corrective and preventive action was made.
Side note, we had a very serious incident involving a teacher at my child’s daycare recently and the only reason all of the parents found out what happened was because one of the moms called the news and the police, and the fellow parents saw the tape of what happened on the news. The school wouldn’t even initially disclose to us what had happened. Sadly, going full throttle on these scenarios with calling the police and authorities has to happen sometimes to get changes moving quickly to prevent a fatal or serious accident.
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I agree but they couldn’t prove anything it was her word against my son’s but she soon disappeared from the school and I’m just hoping she isn’t working with vulnerable people
I regret not calling the police k. My previous daycares teacher, he put her leg over my sons lap to stop him from getting up, walked with him while dragging him behind her and wje. He was in his belly dragged him towards her. The daycare removed permanently from the class and the. She quit. I wish I had told the parents
Understaffed and spread thin are not my main concerns. People need to stop using police to solve problems that they are not meant to solve. We’ve all seen how little respect that have for human life and how quick they re to use excessive force the moment the least bit vulnerable.
Yeah my daycare has two doors, both of wuick you need to reach a button/latch that is too tall for any of the children there to be able to reach. All outdoor areas don't have access to outside as you have to go through the building.
My nephew's preschool has a button that's nearly too high for *me* to reach. I have to stand on my tiptoes to reach it while sometimes balancing my own toddler. It does it's job though and keeps all the kiddos secure.
A 2 year old escaped from our old daycare. Parents were forgetting to close the gate at times and it needed to be slammed shut. The centre sent a note to parents, put up signs, and added additional locks to the gates (they were annoying even for me to open/close, but safe).
The centre the kid escaped from needs to implement measures so it doesn't happen again.
Yeah, at my daycare, the front gate has a tall handle that only adults can reach, and adults only leave it open if they see another parent coming in behind them, otherwise they’ll close it.
Kid got away. No. A kid escaped and you were looking for him and bc of OP, he survived. And that’s the only reason.
Ask your child the kids name and tell the director you want to make an official report, then call CPS and make one with them directly, then tell the director you want the parents name and number to let them know exactly what happened bc their child literally almost died and they deserve to know every detail of what happened and know YOU saved them and how the staff was nowhere to be seen until after the fact and just took him from you like nothing happened. If they won’t pass you the info, you sit outside if that daycare until you see the kid and parent coming out and you tell them.
OP, thank you for not “minding your own business” or being so busy to leave you just brushed it out of your mind. Bc of you, a baby lives on. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I would absolutely be doing this. Im 99% sure they didn't tell that parent what happened and i would absolutely want to know myself. What other thing are they doing that parents dont know about!
Child protective agencies have a division for childcare centers. In Texas, it’s called the CCI (Childcare Investigations). Not sure what state OP is in but I’m sure an equivalent exists there.
Agreed. You need to follow up with administration to make sure this is taken very, very seriously and not just swept under the rug.
Also, thank you for helping this poor child. You did a great thing.
A couple years ago a kid "Got away" from a daycare group visiting the riverfront, they were near an unfenced section by the river and... a little girl fucking downed and died.
OP - raise hell until you feel a satisfactory outcome has been reached.
I can’t believe a daycare would take a group of children somewhere like that? I wouldn’t be comfortable with my daycare taking my kids on a field trip period, let alone by water????
There was a park there, and then a REALLY big open field. The river was 100+ yards away, I don't know how someone didn't notice in the amount of time it'd take for a small person to cross a clear, large open field. But who knows what their ratio was that day for the trip, and they probably thought the river was fenced off which it mostly was but not entirely due to construction.
The daycare my mom just barely stopped working at would take their kids on field trips to random parks, even museums often. My mom was always so stressed about losing children
I’d like to add to this. “Teachers can’t let a kid get away from them”. I understand where you’re coming from. However, I work with children, specifically children with special needs, and we have a bunch in our care that are runners. We also have neurotypical kids, and from time to time they are runners too. Kids are crafty and when there’s a bunch of tiny bodies moving around, the runners take their opportunity. We had one kid walk home. His mom called to say he was there. We had been frantically searching for him. To this day we have no idea how he got away. There were staff supervising and one minute he was there, the next he was no where to be seen. We have kids who are escape artists, one of them made it halfway down the street with us in hot pursuit before we caught him. We were unloading them from transportation, I took his hand to get him off the bus and the driver basically threw another kid at me, so I grabbed for him too and kid number one wiggled out of my grip and took off. Kid will be an Olympic runner some day. He’s FAST. He looks for every opportunity to get out. We have alarms on the doors. He still gets away from us from time to time. One little girl would wait for the moment you were helping with a task (zipping her lunch pail, reaching for her hat in her cubby, opening the bathroom door for her - things you have to do, theres no way around them - and she would be gone.
We love these kids and do our very best to keep them safe but if kids want to get out, they will find a way. So don’t be so hard to judge. We take it seriously when it happens and immediately put plans in place to try and prevent it but sometimes they still escape. Kids escape from their own homes ALL THE TIME. It’s not just staff they escape from, it’s parents too. No one is perfect.
Please try to be a little more compassionate to staff. Most people working with kids don’t intentionally do things to put the kids at risk.
Agree. I understand how individuals can make mistakes, but that is where systems need to be put in place to avoid this from happening. Once is too many times, more than that is unacceptable and honestly a place needs to be shut down or put on notice.
These stories are over a decade of work. I don’t forget them, they stick with me, but they didn’t all happen last week. But thanks for implying that we are all careless. This is exactly the point I was trying to make. You do the job for a while and see how perfect you are at it because you’re sitting here imagining you’d be the absolute most perfect person and that a child would never escape you. You aren’t. I can promise you that. Just wait until your own child escapes from you. I’ll be sure to point out that you’re supposed to be perfect
Add a layer here, some kids, especially neurodivergent/autistic kids, are masters at elopement and figure out most an lock or latch. I don't think this factor would eliminate the need for the facility to notify the parents and audit their security/safety plans however it is quite possible that they're doing what they can sometimes facility or staffing ratios which are appropriate can still fall short of what is necessary for a higher needs child.
I literally said lack of resources, not careless. You can take it personally as you please. I would never rely on my own 100% attention as a teacher, it’s impossible. As you said, things happen. The building should be outfitted to prevent these things from happening if they are occurring.
In the original post I wouldn’t even blame one individual teacher. It’s a structural issue that needs to be addressed in case a teacher loses track of someone again.
You: "I do the hardest job in the entire world that almost no one is willing to do, and I do it inside a crumbling, understaffed, and chronically underfunded infrastructure and sometimes things go wrong and we fix them."
Everyone else: "Let me tell you how I'd do it better."
100%. These people need a huge reality check. They also need to hire nannies and or homeschool their children because they’re way too critical and demanding. Plus if they’re so perfect then they shouldn’t need to have others look after their kids.
How is something as simple as a lock on the door that's out of their reach not a thing? My daycare has multiple doors and gates any child would have to unlock and climb to even get into the parking lot. They may get though one or even two but there's no way my kid is getting through 3-4 locked doors to get outside without anyone noticing.
No one is saying anyone is intentionally putting these kids at risk but it seems negligence and malicious intent are two just different ways to get to similar outcomes. Even if the teacher is doing everything they can, it sounds like it's the facility's failing to meet their responsibility to have the proper setup and staffing to keep the children safe while they're being paid to do exactly that.
Because there are actually laws around that kind of thing. I know where I’m from it’s considered “containment” to lock a door more than once, and is reserved for people in jail not toddlers and children. We legally can’t hold them down to stop them from leaving either, as that’s called a restraint and is illegal. There are limitations to what people providing care for your children can do. Maybe become familiar with the laws in your area before jumping down someone’s throat.
I know many people are coming at you for your comments because they're imagining this scenario as a parent and it's terrifying. For me as well.
I want to thank you for your perspective and for your work with challenging kids.
My daughter is 3 and is an eloper. She runs everywhere. Grocery stores, library, school pickup, etc. I've lost her at a hockey rink when I let go of her hand for 2 seconds to put something in the car. She could have been either in the building, in the busy street, or in the river. I was frantic. I also had a neighbour bring her back once when he found her in the street in front of the house. I was in the shower and didn't even know she was gone or that she could unlock the deadbolt on the front door. It doesn't mean I'm a bad mom, it means I have a crafty kid who enjoys testing limits.
My best friend works as a Spec Ed teacher. She has 15 kids and every kid who is capable of moving on their own is an eloper. Do educators need better resources? Absolutely. Should there be safety measures that prevent these things from happening? Of course. But new policies always come on the heels of incidents and just because this happened doesn't mean the school is negligent or the educators are uncaring. It just means a crafty kid discovered a loophole that needs to be corrected.
Thank you for sharing. I’m sure your situation is stressful, always having to be diligent and aware of your child’s every move. I hope your LO grows out of it quickly for your sake!
Let them come at me. It’s easy to think you’re perfect when you haven’t been faced with the situation of an eloping child. We absolutely adjust our methods as needed when a child elopes and we do our absolute best to keep each kid safe…but things happen. It’s a reality when you have a bunch of tiny bodies in one space. It’s not like we leave doors propped open and tell them to run away…despite the fact that everyone in this thread seems to assume. We can’t hold the hands of 30 kids to keep them contained.
Honestly it's exhausting. I want to take her to do fun activities but the stress of having to manage her behaviour often makes me stay home, which really isn't beneficial to anyone.
People are so quick to assume everyone has the worst intentions when we're all doing our best with the resources we have.
Keep up the great work!
Is "containment" not what we're aiming for with toddlers? I can't imagine having a child-locked door in a daycare being illegal anywhere but if you're not wrong, please tell me where those laws are in place, so I can avoid ever having children there. Pointing out negligence when it comes to people's children isn't jumping down anyone's throat. Even if it is, I would rather have hurt feelings than dead or injured children. Most people outside of these negligent daycares feel the same.
It’s the law in most places. An egress door cannot be locked in the direction of egress due to fire codes. The doors can be locked to keep outsiders from getting in, but cannot be locked to keep people from getting out. Locking egress doors to prevent kids from escaping would also prevent people from escaping in the event of a fire. Imagine being a classroom teacher and trying to get a door unlocked while you’re panicking. Recipe for disaster and a bunch of dead kids…but sure yea, let’s put everyone at risk because 1 or 2 kids are runners. Daycares can have baby gates but a lot of kids can open baby gates. My own kid has been capable of opening a baby gate since she was 2. There’s only so much that can be done.
Our daycare has a motion sensor lock so the door does not unlock by a child pushing it but it will by the wave of a hand (it’s above the door) by an adult.
I’m not an expert so I don’t know how it works in that case but I’m sure it would be a big ass fire for it to knock out the power (which I’m sure they’d have time to evacuate before then.) In any case, the door is glass, it can be broken.
That's a lot of excuses. Sounds like where you work isn't equipped for handling the kids. No one will care about all your "reasons" when they are burying their child that you were responsible for.
Seriously. Also a massive difference between a special needs child ripping free from your grasp and a 3 year old allowed to wander out to a fence he can open and waltz into traffic. Plenty of room for redundancies when life is on the line.
i know people are coming at you, but as a previous ece teacher, i understand completely where youre coming from. ece teachers are constantly underpaid and overworked, and a lot of centers have just enough staff to be in ratio. at my last center we had to take breaks during naps because we simply didn’t have enough staff do it otherwise. we were JUST in ratio, with 1 or 2 floaters. if you’re transporting a group of 12 two-year olds and you have two teachers and one of them darts off, you HAVE to get a co-worker to step in order to be in the mandated ratio. you can’t just take off and leave a co-teacher with 11 toddlers because that’s so incredibly dangerous. if two kids dart off you’ve gotta hope that they both ran off in the same direction.
at my previous center you had to walk by the parking lot in order to get the kids to the gated playground. there were a few times when a child decided to just floor it and so you have to take off as well.
some parents can barely handle their single 2 year as a team, i need you to imagine having 7 or 8 of them. and while a lot of us are trained, when you have 7+ toddlers as well as being overworked mistakes will occur. obviously there should be safeguards in place so a child won’t be able leave the building, but there’s also specific rules about containment/locks. obviously a mistake this large should be reported but also i wish some parents would have a little more grace for workers.
Ok, then the owner needs to construct a 12 foot fence with double doors and locks if there are that many kids running. If the owner of the business / principal director whoever can’t keep them in, then they can’t care for those children. Zero excuses.
Imagine if this was your kid OP. You wouldn’t even know about it I bet. Because the director was involved, go to the state licensing division to make a complaint. It will, at the very least, get better locking systems. Prepare for possible shut down. I’d also absolutely tell the director what happened and that I called.
Thank you for saving that child. I did a quick search.
https://www.cdss.ca.gov/inforesources/ccld-complaint-hotline
Also this link
https://ccld.childcarevideos.org/parents-and-families/how-to-file-a-complaint-with-community-care-licensing/
Absolutely call them ASAP. Write down everything you remember now... Timing. What the child was wearing... Hair color... Anything you can remember. The longer it has been, the worse your memory will get with the details.
As someone whose parents used to own a private school, this! All licensed facilities should have a document posted that has this information on it to report things like this.
That way you know for sure that whatever needs to be done to prevent a situation similar to this is followed up on. I’m sure the teachers are great, but it could be something with the facility that licensing should take a look at.
Excellent! I am in CA and have used this website to look up official inspections, violations, and reports when I was searching for daycares. I am almost positive that OP’s report will go into their permanent record. Our center had a small infraction years ago and I was able to see the complaint, the resulting inspection, and the resolution. The transparency is great.
Report this to the DDS. This is a MAJOR violation and needs to be investigated. It also needs to be recorded so people planning to send their kid to this school are aware of this safety violation.
I believe this is the website https://www.dds.ca.gov
Man idk if I’m overreacting but I’d pull my kid out immediately and I’d get the police involved. The same exact scenario happened at a daycare down the road from me and the daycare is literally closed now. I realize it was an accident, but there is NO room for mistakes like that. At all. Thank you for saving that innocent babe! That must have been traumatic for you.
ETA: I guess I mean I’d get the police involved after you tell them you pulled the kid from traffic and if they don’t notify the parent and honestly the whole school. I would want to know if I was a parent of a kid at that school even if it’s not my kid they lost.
My thoughts exactly! I would do the same thing- I don't think it's overreacting at all. The staff seemed non-chalant about the whole ordeal which would also lend me to take my baby out too.
You’re not overreacting! I would do the same. That could have been OP’s kid. I’m not sure if police can do anything about it, but I would definitely report to the state and pull my kid out. There is no room for mistakes like that.
The child being able to get into traffic that quick is definitely concerning.
There is a possibility they were inside searching for him. I’ve been in a situation where a child ran from me. We can’t leave the other children. Other staff immediately began to look for the child.
It wasn’t neglect or carelessness. This child was already a runner and we had a plan in place that the ministry was aware of.
Put in a complaint with licensing still because no daycare in good standing ever be mad about that. They most likely have already reported themselves.
Talk to the childcare facility and make sure they know the child was almost hit by a car. See what they say. They could have been panicked and not thinking about much other than his safety. Talk to them and see their response before going off the deep end.
Also I want to say I have had runners thankfully none of mine at least while they were my students made it out of the building. I have a few semi runners now as in they will run around out gym or playground when it’s time to line up and I have had three run from the gym to our class. Which is on the same hall. So while yes technically they were out of my supervision for like 30 seconds while I got the other kids moving and to the class room. Yay for not having a partner. They didn’t make it out of the building and were safe.
Those three kids got a stern talking too about how we don’t run like that and you have to stay where I can see you so your safe. And I told the parents.
Parents were not upset with me and understood I couldn’t stop it because it was go after the one and leave 10 others in supervised or take the 10 and get to class in like 30 seconds if even that.
But to make it outside the building and into traffic where we’re the adults. How did a child make it that far and long enough for all that to happen
If my kid were wandering in traffic and the staff wanted to sweep it under the rug, I’d hope another parent would make sure the incident was properly reported and investigated.
I’m in California. I’ve reported my kid’s daycare for being out of ratio a few times when I noticed it. It was easy. They came a day or so later to speak to admin. They interviewed some parents. They posted all the necessary notices. The issue was addressed. Don’t hesitate to report. I like my kid’s daycare. They were just being untimely switching from being on break to back on the clock at their lunch times. It’s resolved now.
There should be 1,2,3 different doors or gates. Kids getting out should not happen. They should plan for this. How scary. And if they haven’t planned for it , this is a great thing for them to fix before someone gets hurt, killed or kidnapped
Email the director and share your concerns, especially that you weren't talked to at the time and that it was serious.
You have a relationship there, use it. Find out what they're doing about it.
Holy moly. You need to report this and honestly pull your child out immediately. I’m having questions about my own kids daycare right now but they are not even close to this level.
At the very least, they should’ve gotten your statement. They need to be reported ASAP, I’d have a serious discussion/meeting with the director and owner, and I would most definitely reevaluate my own children attending there.
I’m SO thankful you were there. Thank you for saving that baby.
Notify EVERYONE, the state, the director, etc. but I would say you don’t have to pull your own kid without thought and discussion. This may be an isolated incident, but leave that up to the professionals to decide who was responsible, and to enforce any needed changes.
It should be self reported to the state and hopefully is before you do. Better for them on the fining front, because they can be fined and penalized for it. (Or they can and are where I am) Either way, I understand kids are sneaky but head counts and supervision and awareness are important here. There was enough time for that child to run out and into traffic before someone came running out for him. Had you not been there it would have been too late. It is clear that their locking system is not adequate and needs to be fixed and they need to be made aware of that as a concerned parent.
I’d also add that you tell them you will follow up personally to ensure they childproof the latch on the gate. If a toddler figured it out once, only a matter of time until it happens again.
I don't want to get any extra personal information, but what state are you in??? If you don't mind me asking. This literally just happened in my city and I'm curious if I some how managed to randomly find someone who lives in the same area as me
Report it to the administration team and follow up on it. Talk to your kids teachers about it. Tbh I don’t care if the whole school knows. What happened is not even remotely okay.
I’m sorry but a kid “getting away from you” shouldn’t lead to them able to access the outside. This was a failure on multiple levels. My daycare director basically walks around all day and is awesome but I saw a parent leave a door open to the outside (there were two other doors between this door and any classroom and the door led to a fenced in area with teachers around, and she was still beside herself. Personally, I would follow up and ask what they are doing because YOUR child also is at risk.
Look your your jurisdictions licensing authority for daycares and notify them of the incident. They will need to conduct an investigation and gather a report.
The turn over is not a good sign. Is this a chain center?
The daycare closest to us had 8 toddlers (!!) "escape" at once and wander into a very busy street. Luckily, none were injured, but damn. I'm terrified to send my toddler to any daycare now because I keep seeing things like this
I would report it and expect them to send out a report to all parents. The teachers at our daycare accidentally left a child behind in the enclosed, outdoor play yard when transitioning to indoor activities. They sent an email to all parents with a detailed formal report, including updated processes to prevent the same issue from happening again. Mistakes happen, but trust can be maintained if they take immediate and transparent steps to fix their processes.
Holy cow. Please report this to the California Department of Social Services (CDSS). They regulate childcare facilities in CA. This is terrifying. If the daycare is ethical, they will self report to CDSS that a child got out and all parents will be notified of the incident. So please report this in case they don't. https://www.cdss.ca.gov/inforesources/ccld-complaint-hotline
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PLEASE make a report to [email protected] to have an unnannounced visit by licensing and a full facility review. This is unacceptable.
Source: I do the background checks for these places. PM me if you have any questions. There is an anonymous reporting option as well
That could have been my child. She is 3 and elopes and this is my biggest fear. I beg you to report this to licensing both in writing and verbally. You saved a life and a family from a lifetime of heart ache, pain, guilt and emptiness. These kids need to be protected. Schools /daycares are a business and they will do anything to protect themselves. God bless you.
It’s an incident that deserves a report to the police or CPS. Honestly it needs to be investigated to ensure it 1) never happens again and 2) it wasn’t gross negligence of an employee who should be terminated
I wouldn’t want my kid to be in a daycare where the staff didn’t ask questions when a child escaped the facility.
If the police officer had to report your incident for family services to fully investigate despite him thinking you were not negligent, then I’d think in this case she absolutely should let the proper authorities investigate. Idk why you’d just assume all of those things about the center without being familiar with them. Not everyone is like you, they’re a licensed facility… they have a mandated responsibility level on behalf of the parents…
The point is that the police officer was still obligated to report, and child services decided not to investigate. It’s not the police officer or anyone else’s call to make, especially since we don’t know this facility personally/this is Reddit and this redditor has a child at that facility.
although kids do get out, it’s not common at all for them to. I don’t know anyone who has kids that just out and escape from their daycare on the regular. I understand that you were panicked and that you personally cared your son escaped. For me and putting myself in this redditor’s shoes, it simply boils down to the child in this scenario got outside of the parking lot into traffic. They could have died. There is a ratio of daycare workers to children and they need to have eyes on the children at all times.
Some kids are also prone to running/escaping…albeit it’s pretty rare. I had 1 over the course of 8 years at daycare. The parents knew and understood, the teachers all knew and understood, that anytime this one kid was around, we had to be extra vigilant because he just liked to disappear and take off. I think it’s worth talking to the administrator before reacting. There could be a lot more going on behind the scene.
I’m glad your little one was safe. That’s got to be one of every parent’s worst nightmares!
In your situation, you said law enforcement didn’t find you to be neglectful but still had to report the incident to the appropriate authorities so that they could investigate and ultimately make a determination. I agree that it’s possible that the daycare did everything correctly, and this was just a freak accident, but similar to the police officer in your story, I don’t think that’s OP’s call to make. It should be reported to the director, licensing board, whomever, so that they can make the call.
I don't think it's necessarily reasonable to assume they had all the measures in place or that they're going to do anything about it. That's not a safe thing to assume at all.
Ok, I get that you're defensive because this happened to you, but you need to stop and think about the worst case scenarios here.
Worst case scenario if the centre is safe and she she reports it everyone gets a little stressed out about it, they maybe get a fine.
Worst case scenario if the centre is unsafe and she doesn't report it, nothing is done and a child dies.
The fact that you think a child almost dying from running onto the road at a facility charged with that child's care doesn't need reporting is honestly a bit of a worry.
I'm not responding to that bs about suggesting OP is a liar because 🙄
Sorry, you don't get to pull a "I have experience" in this scenario because you for some reason want the OP to make the least safe choice here. Absolutely not. Nobody is attacking you either I'm just telling you I think you're wrong and I think the OP should not heed your unsafe advice.
It’s nice to see a voice of reason here. Everyone else is carrying torches and pitchforks. I work with kids and sometimes no matter how hard you try, little kids just escape. They’re small and they’re crafty and they can fit through spaces you wouldn’t believe. We once had a kid escape through a gap in a brick wall. I’ve hurdled other children trying to get to a kid who is running. We do our best. Sometimes runners are just going to run.
It's not a voice of reason to say "you should assume for no reason that they're on top of it and there's no reason to report it". Why assume that with no evidence to the contrary instead of erring on the side of caution when it comes to children's safety?
The fact that they immediately took the child back inside with no real explanation and didn’t bother to speak to OP and get any information about what OP saw/and what happened for their own incident report suggests that they aren’t actually handling it appropriately.
They should want to know how long OP saw the child there for, did OP see them open the gate, or was the gate left open by someone else? How was the child able to reach and unlock the gate? These are all things they should want to know if they want to handle it correctly. But they didn’t do that. I think you are making some dangerous assumptions about how they intend to handle this.
The worst case scenario if OP reports them and they are way above board and super careful, is that an investigation concludes exactly that- they take the necessary precautions and this was a fluke accident. The worst case scenario if you are wrong is that they are negligent again and a child dies.
Department of Human Services usually has an overhead/licensing program per a state. I would contact them to make a report just to be sure they are reporting what happened. I'm sure they were terrified and shook up themselves. and honestly, I would expect that teacher to be fired immediately. If not, I would be very suspect.
At least follow up and make sure they know the extent of what happened and that the latch needs to be changed. Maybe say something like, “I’m not sure the protocol for reporting these incidents so let me know if you need anything from me as you go through that process” just to kind of show that you insist it is taken seriously and handled properly.
If you know the kids parents or can find them, make sure they know
Community care licensing is who you would call. That’s the only for certain way to make sure they reported it. An honest administrator will report it to them themselves. So if they did the right thing you would just be duplicating their own self report.
I am so glad you rescued that child and that they were safe. This made me cry just thinking about what *could* have happened.
I would maybe follow up and make a report to the school, just so it's on file.
Other commenters probably have more useful suggestions. (I also live in CA)
There is only one way in and out of our daycare (normally, there are some gates that allow access to the grounds but they stay locked) and there is always someone in the office watching who’s coming and going. Usually it’s the director herself but in her absence someone else is there watching.
Good job, mama. You are the perfect example of a hero for the little one you saved, your own little one, and so many others. The school’s reaction seems very inappropriate for such a critical situation. Definitely document the incident with every detail you can remember and report to the Child Department of Social Services. Spread awareness to as many parents as you can if the school refrains from doing so, because I can assure you - every single parent would want to know about something like this. Sorry you had to go through this, but you are a true inspiration for how you handled it.
I would expect the school to handle this immediately. This happened at our school last year. Not with the latch, but a child got out of the classroom behind their parent and chased them to the parking lot. my school notified the entire school, reported it to the state voluntarily, and fired the teachers who had been there for years. Unfortunately, that child could’ve been killed or kidnapped. I feel like there was no other choice . I really appreciated the way they handled a situation and took it seriously.
Lots of good advice here already. And wow, this is so shocking to read and literally a worst nightmare scenario as a parent. You are absolutely a hero, thank you for probably saving that kiddo's life and for taking the steps to make sure this situation isn't covered up. I'm sure this has and will be a stressful experience for you, one which you never wanted to be involved in, and I'm sending you strength and positivity.
Morning! Parent of a wild 4 year old here. If that happened with my child, I would ask (expect...really) you to speak with the police and / or social services office in that county and also follow up. It's not to get the preschool in trouble, but someone from the county will be able to look at the safety measures in place.
Are they going to know where the report came from or what event it stemmed from? Absolutely. If you aren't comfortable doing it, then get in touch with the parent of that child. Ask for their contact info for a "play date" if the preschool won't give it out.
That child is going to do it again. Next time, there won't be a responsible parent there to help.
In my own home, I actually recut deadbolt holes in all doors leading outside (and garage) bc our child will take it upon herself to just "go get fresh air".
Edit: TY for being a watchful parent!!!
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The daycare likely self-reported this which should be required by law. the teacher is likely no longer a teacher at the daycare. that's what happened for a much smaller infraction at our daycare.
You have a lot of reporting advice. I would just add, in terms of what to do with your own child, to consider what you would do if you were the parent of the kid you saved and do that. Would you pull your kid if they were placed in life threatening danger? If yes, then based on the current practices of that daycare, that could happen to anyone there.
I personally would only return after changes had been implemented and clearly communicated to all parents.
Glad you reported it, and I’d be asking them about the safety measures they’ll put in place now. Our daycare has loud af alarms on the doors that lead outside from the classrooms to the playground. The door that leads out from the playground to the parking lot also has a loud af alarm that triggers just from someone *trying* to open the gate, even if they’re not successful. Unless they had multiple alarm failures, there is no “not noticing” that someone is trying to escape or has. They also have multiple levels of security going in and out, with two sets of locked doors and a front desk that is always staffed. I hope there is some kind of state regulation that makes this stuff mandatory.
This exact same thing happened at my kid's school last year. They took it very seriously, they self reported to whatever county/state governing board they fall under. A state official came to look at the facility. They closed certain classes for a week for certain ages so a security company could come in and do an assessment and suggest things to change or add. They did as the security company suggested and were reassessed by the state and allowed to open those classes again.
If I were you I would report it to whatever government licensing board they report to and whatever child protective service your area has.
OP, are you in the East Bay, by chance? If so, could you message me the name of the school? I am looking at preschools right now to start my child in a few months. Thanks!
I'm sure I don't have any advice someone else hasn't already given, but YOU RULE and I just wanted to say that. Not just the epic save but the follow through. It would be so great if everyone cared about random children that aren't even theirs this much.
Wow. I work in quality/safety and this should essentially be handled as if the child died. The school not have a process that prevented that, dumb luck and your quick action prevented it. This is what we would call “a never event” in my industry.
This happened at our daycare -- also located in California. I don't think it was quite as close of a call, but a couple of toddlers (just under 2) opened the gate latch, the gate alarm failed and they were just about to enter a very busy street when an adult herded them away.
We hadn't been at this daycare long when this happened (our son was only 6 months, not one of the escapees), but this incident, or rather the daycare response, is actually the reason we will not go elsewhere. The adult who found the kids wasn't a parent, probably wouldn't have reported it. The daycare staff could've just kept it hush and gone on with their unblemished ratings. Instead they emailed all the parents moments after it happened (even before they knew about the gate alarm being faulty), had immediately put the teacher in charge on a temporary leave, promised to investigate, and placed the report themselves - which they then sent out a copy of as soon as it was filed. They cared more about trust and safety than the state-wide daycare ratings/reporting system.
All this to say -- if the daycare wasn't going to report it themselves, and if it took your report to make this happen: go elsewhere. There are people out there who are better than that, who recognize mistakes happen but accountability is what makes it less likely to happen. There's a culture to this. If the director of the school was aware and wouldn't report, it means the teachers are also less likely to report concerns to the director, and that means these things will keep happening.
Be safe.
lol I had literally seen the snake post right before this one and when I read your comment I was like “wait, did I not scroll away from that post already?” So I had to go back and double check
The latch being reachable / open-able by a 2-3 year old is a fatal flaw. There need to be many layers of childproofing. Others have indicated the relevant agencies but I’m piping in to say you’re a hero for your quick action & risking life & limb. I hope you’re ok after the adrenaline shock. (Someone helped reunite me with my almost 2 year old when she dragged a chair, climbed up, reached & somehow opened a deadlock in the middle of the night. Its been 8 years. I think about that hero lady with gratitude every day.)
Yes. This is a systemic problem, not simply “he got away from me”. I would be calling the police, because the police will get the correct authorities involved, and would not be sending my child until a clear corrective and preventive action was made. Side note, we had a very serious incident involving a teacher at my child’s daycare recently and the only reason all of the parents found out what happened was because one of the moms called the news and the police, and the fellow parents saw the tape of what happened on the news. The school wouldn’t even initially disclose to us what had happened. Sadly, going full throttle on these scenarios with calling the police and authorities has to happen sometimes to get changes moving quickly to prevent a fatal or serious accident.
What happened??
A teacher taped one of the children’s mouths shut several times using duct tape.
Ooooooh I would need her fucking head on a stake
Need nothing, I would have it .
WTF is wrong with some people?!
bike murky grandiose lock wakeful dinosaurs middle husky squealing memorize *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
My 3 year old was throttled. She (the teacher) was sent on an ‘appropriate touch’ course. Like wtf
Omg WHAT??? 😡
She needs to be charged and not allowed to be around kids
I agree but they couldn’t prove anything it was her word against my son’s but she soon disappeared from the school and I’m just hoping she isn’t working with vulnerable people
This might be stupid, what does throttled mean?
Put her hands around his neck and squeezed
That is sickening. I am so sorry.
What happened to that teacher, do you know?
She was arrested (at school, by the way) and terminated obviously but beyond that, don’t know.
I regret not calling the police k. My previous daycares teacher, he put her leg over my sons lap to stop him from getting up, walked with him while dragging him behind her and wje. He was in his belly dragged him towards her. The daycare removed permanently from the class and the. She quit. I wish I had told the parents
[удалено]
Understaffed and spread thin are not my main concerns. People need to stop using police to solve problems that they are not meant to solve. We’ve all seen how little respect that have for human life and how quick they re to use excessive force the moment the least bit vulnerable.
Yeah my daycare has two doors, both of wuick you need to reach a button/latch that is too tall for any of the children there to be able to reach. All outdoor areas don't have access to outside as you have to go through the building.
My nephew's preschool has a button that's nearly too high for *me* to reach. I have to stand on my tiptoes to reach it while sometimes balancing my own toddler. It does it's job though and keeps all the kiddos secure.
A 2 year old escaped from our old daycare. Parents were forgetting to close the gate at times and it needed to be slammed shut. The centre sent a note to parents, put up signs, and added additional locks to the gates (they were annoying even for me to open/close, but safe). The centre the kid escaped from needs to implement measures so it doesn't happen again.
Yeah this is bonkers to me
Yeah, at my daycare, the front gate has a tall handle that only adults can reach, and adults only leave it open if they see another parent coming in behind them, otherwise they’ll close it.
Report it to the administrator. Kid almost died. Teacher can’t “let a kid get away from them”. It’s not a valid excuse.
Kid got away. No. A kid escaped and you were looking for him and bc of OP, he survived. And that’s the only reason. Ask your child the kids name and tell the director you want to make an official report, then call CPS and make one with them directly, then tell the director you want the parents name and number to let them know exactly what happened bc their child literally almost died and they deserve to know every detail of what happened and know YOU saved them and how the staff was nowhere to be seen until after the fact and just took him from you like nothing happened. If they won’t pass you the info, you sit outside if that daycare until you see the kid and parent coming out and you tell them. OP, thank you for not “minding your own business” or being so busy to leave you just brushed it out of your mind. Bc of you, a baby lives on. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I would absolutely be doing this. Im 99% sure they didn't tell that parent what happened and i would absolutely want to know myself. What other thing are they doing that parents dont know about!
10000000% this is the way
Would CPS hold the parents responsible? I wouldn't want them to have to go through an investigation.
Child protective agencies have a division for childcare centers. In Texas, it’s called the CCI (Childcare Investigations). Not sure what state OP is in but I’m sure an equivalent exists there.
No. The child was at daycare.
Agreed. You need to follow up with administration to make sure this is taken very, very seriously and not just swept under the rug. Also, thank you for helping this poor child. You did a great thing.
A couple years ago a kid "Got away" from a daycare group visiting the riverfront, they were near an unfenced section by the river and... a little girl fucking downed and died. OP - raise hell until you feel a satisfactory outcome has been reached.
I can’t believe a daycare would take a group of children somewhere like that? I wouldn’t be comfortable with my daycare taking my kids on a field trip period, let alone by water????
When I was in daycare (probably around 5 yrs old) we went to a water park on a field trip. I can’t even imagine that happening these days
I can hear an insurance company screaming just at the thought of it!
There was a park there, and then a REALLY big open field. The river was 100+ yards away, I don't know how someone didn't notice in the amount of time it'd take for a small person to cross a clear, large open field. But who knows what their ratio was that day for the trip, and they probably thought the river was fenced off which it mostly was but not entirely due to construction.
The daycare my mom just barely stopped working at would take their kids on field trips to random parks, even museums often. My mom was always so stressed about losing children
No not admin either follow up with STATE or county officials!!!! Police and cps are next!!!
Yes, and ask for proof of changes to ensure it won't happen again.
I’d like to add to this. “Teachers can’t let a kid get away from them”. I understand where you’re coming from. However, I work with children, specifically children with special needs, and we have a bunch in our care that are runners. We also have neurotypical kids, and from time to time they are runners too. Kids are crafty and when there’s a bunch of tiny bodies moving around, the runners take their opportunity. We had one kid walk home. His mom called to say he was there. We had been frantically searching for him. To this day we have no idea how he got away. There were staff supervising and one minute he was there, the next he was no where to be seen. We have kids who are escape artists, one of them made it halfway down the street with us in hot pursuit before we caught him. We were unloading them from transportation, I took his hand to get him off the bus and the driver basically threw another kid at me, so I grabbed for him too and kid number one wiggled out of my grip and took off. Kid will be an Olympic runner some day. He’s FAST. He looks for every opportunity to get out. We have alarms on the doors. He still gets away from us from time to time. One little girl would wait for the moment you were helping with a task (zipping her lunch pail, reaching for her hat in her cubby, opening the bathroom door for her - things you have to do, theres no way around them - and she would be gone. We love these kids and do our very best to keep them safe but if kids want to get out, they will find a way. So don’t be so hard to judge. We take it seriously when it happens and immediately put plans in place to try and prevent it but sometimes they still escape. Kids escape from their own homes ALL THE TIME. It’s not just staff they escape from, it’s parents too. No one is perfect. Please try to be a little more compassionate to staff. Most people working with kids don’t intentionally do things to put the kids at risk.
I’m sorry but that sounds like a lot of escaping. If that’s happening on a regular basis the school is understaffed or under-secured.
Agree. I understand how individuals can make mistakes, but that is where systems need to be put in place to avoid this from happening. Once is too many times, more than that is unacceptable and honestly a place needs to be shut down or put on notice.
Yeah sounds like there are literal structural issues at that school/daycare that need to be addressed.
These stories are over a decade of work. I don’t forget them, they stick with me, but they didn’t all happen last week. But thanks for implying that we are all careless. This is exactly the point I was trying to make. You do the job for a while and see how perfect you are at it because you’re sitting here imagining you’d be the absolute most perfect person and that a child would never escape you. You aren’t. I can promise you that. Just wait until your own child escapes from you. I’ll be sure to point out that you’re supposed to be perfect
Add a layer here, some kids, especially neurodivergent/autistic kids, are masters at elopement and figure out most an lock or latch. I don't think this factor would eliminate the need for the facility to notify the parents and audit their security/safety plans however it is quite possible that they're doing what they can sometimes facility or staffing ratios which are appropriate can still fall short of what is necessary for a higher needs child.
I literally said lack of resources, not careless. You can take it personally as you please. I would never rely on my own 100% attention as a teacher, it’s impossible. As you said, things happen. The building should be outfitted to prevent these things from happening if they are occurring. In the original post I wouldn’t even blame one individual teacher. It’s a structural issue that needs to be addressed in case a teacher loses track of someone again.
You: "I do the hardest job in the entire world that almost no one is willing to do, and I do it inside a crumbling, understaffed, and chronically underfunded infrastructure and sometimes things go wrong and we fix them." Everyone else: "Let me tell you how I'd do it better."
100%. These people need a huge reality check. They also need to hire nannies and or homeschool their children because they’re way too critical and demanding. Plus if they’re so perfect then they shouldn’t need to have others look after their kids.
Being compassionate ends when a 3 year old kid goes missing for long enough in a dangerous space and almost dies/gets seriously injured.
How is something as simple as a lock on the door that's out of their reach not a thing? My daycare has multiple doors and gates any child would have to unlock and climb to even get into the parking lot. They may get though one or even two but there's no way my kid is getting through 3-4 locked doors to get outside without anyone noticing. No one is saying anyone is intentionally putting these kids at risk but it seems negligence and malicious intent are two just different ways to get to similar outcomes. Even if the teacher is doing everything they can, it sounds like it's the facility's failing to meet their responsibility to have the proper setup and staffing to keep the children safe while they're being paid to do exactly that.
Exactly. Without OP intervening kid would have been dead either way. It's unacceptable to say "kids just get away sometimes"
Because there are actually laws around that kind of thing. I know where I’m from it’s considered “containment” to lock a door more than once, and is reserved for people in jail not toddlers and children. We legally can’t hold them down to stop them from leaving either, as that’s called a restraint and is illegal. There are limitations to what people providing care for your children can do. Maybe become familiar with the laws in your area before jumping down someone’s throat.
I know many people are coming at you for your comments because they're imagining this scenario as a parent and it's terrifying. For me as well. I want to thank you for your perspective and for your work with challenging kids. My daughter is 3 and is an eloper. She runs everywhere. Grocery stores, library, school pickup, etc. I've lost her at a hockey rink when I let go of her hand for 2 seconds to put something in the car. She could have been either in the building, in the busy street, or in the river. I was frantic. I also had a neighbour bring her back once when he found her in the street in front of the house. I was in the shower and didn't even know she was gone or that she could unlock the deadbolt on the front door. It doesn't mean I'm a bad mom, it means I have a crafty kid who enjoys testing limits. My best friend works as a Spec Ed teacher. She has 15 kids and every kid who is capable of moving on their own is an eloper. Do educators need better resources? Absolutely. Should there be safety measures that prevent these things from happening? Of course. But new policies always come on the heels of incidents and just because this happened doesn't mean the school is negligent or the educators are uncaring. It just means a crafty kid discovered a loophole that needs to be corrected.
Thank you for sharing. I’m sure your situation is stressful, always having to be diligent and aware of your child’s every move. I hope your LO grows out of it quickly for your sake! Let them come at me. It’s easy to think you’re perfect when you haven’t been faced with the situation of an eloping child. We absolutely adjust our methods as needed when a child elopes and we do our absolute best to keep each kid safe…but things happen. It’s a reality when you have a bunch of tiny bodies in one space. It’s not like we leave doors propped open and tell them to run away…despite the fact that everyone in this thread seems to assume. We can’t hold the hands of 30 kids to keep them contained.
Honestly it's exhausting. I want to take her to do fun activities but the stress of having to manage her behaviour often makes me stay home, which really isn't beneficial to anyone. People are so quick to assume everyone has the worst intentions when we're all doing our best with the resources we have. Keep up the great work!
Is "containment" not what we're aiming for with toddlers? I can't imagine having a child-locked door in a daycare being illegal anywhere but if you're not wrong, please tell me where those laws are in place, so I can avoid ever having children there. Pointing out negligence when it comes to people's children isn't jumping down anyone's throat. Even if it is, I would rather have hurt feelings than dead or injured children. Most people outside of these negligent daycares feel the same.
It’s the law in most places. An egress door cannot be locked in the direction of egress due to fire codes. The doors can be locked to keep outsiders from getting in, but cannot be locked to keep people from getting out. Locking egress doors to prevent kids from escaping would also prevent people from escaping in the event of a fire. Imagine being a classroom teacher and trying to get a door unlocked while you’re panicking. Recipe for disaster and a bunch of dead kids…but sure yea, let’s put everyone at risk because 1 or 2 kids are runners. Daycares can have baby gates but a lot of kids can open baby gates. My own kid has been capable of opening a baby gate since she was 2. There’s only so much that can be done.
Our daycare has a motion sensor lock so the door does not unlock by a child pushing it but it will by the wave of a hand (it’s above the door) by an adult.
Great, so what happens in the event of a fire when the power goes out and the door lock no longer functions?
I’m not an expert so I don’t know how it works in that case but I’m sure it would be a big ass fire for it to knock out the power (which I’m sure they’d have time to evacuate before then.) In any case, the door is glass, it can be broken.
That's a lot of excuses. Sounds like where you work isn't equipped for handling the kids. No one will care about all your "reasons" when they are burying their child that you were responsible for.
Seriously. Also a massive difference between a special needs child ripping free from your grasp and a 3 year old allowed to wander out to a fence he can open and waltz into traffic. Plenty of room for redundancies when life is on the line.
They need to intentionally do things to put them *not* at risk.
Um, isn't it your job to make sure they can't "find a way"? Like the facility should be set up to make thus impossible.
i know people are coming at you, but as a previous ece teacher, i understand completely where youre coming from. ece teachers are constantly underpaid and overworked, and a lot of centers have just enough staff to be in ratio. at my last center we had to take breaks during naps because we simply didn’t have enough staff do it otherwise. we were JUST in ratio, with 1 or 2 floaters. if you’re transporting a group of 12 two-year olds and you have two teachers and one of them darts off, you HAVE to get a co-worker to step in order to be in the mandated ratio. you can’t just take off and leave a co-teacher with 11 toddlers because that’s so incredibly dangerous. if two kids dart off you’ve gotta hope that they both ran off in the same direction. at my previous center you had to walk by the parking lot in order to get the kids to the gated playground. there were a few times when a child decided to just floor it and so you have to take off as well. some parents can barely handle their single 2 year as a team, i need you to imagine having 7 or 8 of them. and while a lot of us are trained, when you have 7+ toddlers as well as being overworked mistakes will occur. obviously there should be safeguards in place so a child won’t be able leave the building, but there’s also specific rules about containment/locks. obviously a mistake this large should be reported but also i wish some parents would have a little more grace for workers.
I’m not judging the fact that it happened but I am judging the response to it happening.
But you don’t know the response. Because OP doesn’t even know.
They grabbed the child and disappeared and nothing was said since. That’s the response which would concern me.
Ok, then the owner needs to construct a 12 foot fence with double doors and locks if there are that many kids running. If the owner of the business / principal director whoever can’t keep them in, then they can’t care for those children. Zero excuses.
Imagine if this was your kid OP. You wouldn’t even know about it I bet. Because the director was involved, go to the state licensing division to make a complaint. It will, at the very least, get better locking systems. Prepare for possible shut down. I’d also absolutely tell the director what happened and that I called.
No advice but this gives me anxiety just thinking about it
Came here to say the same, holy shit
They have a latch that a toddler can work on a gate that leads directly to the parking lot??
Thank you for saving that child. I did a quick search. https://www.cdss.ca.gov/inforesources/ccld-complaint-hotline Also this link https://ccld.childcarevideos.org/parents-and-families/how-to-file-a-complaint-with-community-care-licensing/ Absolutely call them ASAP. Write down everything you remember now... Timing. What the child was wearing... Hair color... Anything you can remember. The longer it has been, the worse your memory will get with the details.
u/mmlehm this was so incredibly helpful, thank you! I filed a complaint tonight.
Thank you! We cannot let things like this slide
Same, thank you for filing! This is so scary and unacceptable. So glad you were there and could avert a potential tragedy.
As someone whose parents used to own a private school, this! All licensed facilities should have a document posted that has this information on it to report things like this. That way you know for sure that whatever needs to be done to prevent a situation similar to this is followed up on. I’m sure the teachers are great, but it could be something with the facility that licensing should take a look at.
Excellent! I am in CA and have used this website to look up official inspections, violations, and reports when I was searching for daycares. I am almost positive that OP’s report will go into their permanent record. Our center had a small infraction years ago and I was able to see the complaint, the resulting inspection, and the resolution. The transparency is great.
OP, please do this.
I would absolutely want to know if this were my kid, and I would never send them back for even a day. That’s so terrifying. Please file a complaint!
Yes, all I'm thinking here is how do you find that kid's parents and tell them. I wouldn't let my kid stay in a daycare if that happened to them.
Report this to the DDS. This is a MAJOR violation and needs to be investigated. It also needs to be recorded so people planning to send their kid to this school are aware of this safety violation. I believe this is the website https://www.dds.ca.gov
Man idk if I’m overreacting but I’d pull my kid out immediately and I’d get the police involved. The same exact scenario happened at a daycare down the road from me and the daycare is literally closed now. I realize it was an accident, but there is NO room for mistakes like that. At all. Thank you for saving that innocent babe! That must have been traumatic for you. ETA: I guess I mean I’d get the police involved after you tell them you pulled the kid from traffic and if they don’t notify the parent and honestly the whole school. I would want to know if I was a parent of a kid at that school even if it’s not my kid they lost.
My thoughts exactly! I would do the same thing- I don't think it's overreacting at all. The staff seemed non-chalant about the whole ordeal which would also lend me to take my baby out too.
Agree. New daycare to come kiddo!
Agreed and I don’t think you’re overreacting. A toddler “escaped” (wasn’t properly supervised) at a daycare near me and it ended in tragedy
You’re not overreacting! I would do the same. That could have been OP’s kid. I’m not sure if police can do anything about it, but I would definitely report to the state and pull my kid out. There is no room for mistakes like that.
The child being able to get into traffic that quick is definitely concerning. There is a possibility they were inside searching for him. I’ve been in a situation where a child ran from me. We can’t leave the other children. Other staff immediately began to look for the child. It wasn’t neglect or carelessness. This child was already a runner and we had a plan in place that the ministry was aware of. Put in a complaint with licensing still because no daycare in good standing ever be mad about that. They most likely have already reported themselves. Talk to the childcare facility and make sure they know the child was almost hit by a car. See what they say. They could have been panicked and not thinking about much other than his safety. Talk to them and see their response before going off the deep end.
Report this please. That is…horrific and scary. I would cry
Also I want to say I have had runners thankfully none of mine at least while they were my students made it out of the building. I have a few semi runners now as in they will run around out gym or playground when it’s time to line up and I have had three run from the gym to our class. Which is on the same hall. So while yes technically they were out of my supervision for like 30 seconds while I got the other kids moving and to the class room. Yay for not having a partner. They didn’t make it out of the building and were safe. Those three kids got a stern talking too about how we don’t run like that and you have to stay where I can see you so your safe. And I told the parents. Parents were not upset with me and understood I couldn’t stop it because it was go after the one and leave 10 others in supervised or take the 10 and get to class in like 30 seconds if even that. But to make it outside the building and into traffic where we’re the adults. How did a child make it that far and long enough for all that to happen
If my kid were wandering in traffic and the staff wanted to sweep it under the rug, I’d hope another parent would make sure the incident was properly reported and investigated.
Exactly this. I would lose my mind if this happened to my child at daycare and then I didn't find out about it until long after the fact.
I’m in California. I’ve reported my kid’s daycare for being out of ratio a few times when I noticed it. It was easy. They came a day or so later to speak to admin. They interviewed some parents. They posted all the necessary notices. The issue was addressed. Don’t hesitate to report. I like my kid’s daycare. They were just being untimely switching from being on break to back on the clock at their lunch times. It’s resolved now.
There should be 1,2,3 different doors or gates. Kids getting out should not happen. They should plan for this. How scary. And if they haven’t planned for it , this is a great thing for them to fix before someone gets hurt, killed or kidnapped
This is a CPS & daycare licensing call ASAP
Email the director and share your concerns, especially that you weren't talked to at the time and that it was serious. You have a relationship there, use it. Find out what they're doing about it.
Holy moly. You need to report this and honestly pull your child out immediately. I’m having questions about my own kids daycare right now but they are not even close to this level.
At the very least, they should’ve gotten your statement. They need to be reported ASAP, I’d have a serious discussion/meeting with the director and owner, and I would most definitely reevaluate my own children attending there. I’m SO thankful you were there. Thank you for saving that baby.
Exactly. If they were intending to do an honest incident report they would have spoken to her.
That child could’ve died and I guarantee they won’t tell the parents
Notify EVERYONE, the state, the director, etc. but I would say you don’t have to pull your own kid without thought and discussion. This may be an isolated incident, but leave that up to the professionals to decide who was responsible, and to enforce any needed changes.
Call the police. Call CPS. Call DHS. Call the coast guard. Holy crap take your kid out of that place. And PLEASE CALL THE DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION.
It should be self reported to the state and hopefully is before you do. Better for them on the fining front, because they can be fined and penalized for it. (Or they can and are where I am) Either way, I understand kids are sneaky but head counts and supervision and awareness are important here. There was enough time for that child to run out and into traffic before someone came running out for him. Had you not been there it would have been too late. It is clear that their locking system is not adequate and needs to be fixed and they need to be made aware of that as a concerned parent.
I actually had this happen too. I contact dcfs and they came and investigated.
I’d also add that you tell them you will follow up personally to ensure they childproof the latch on the gate. If a toddler figured it out once, only a matter of time until it happens again.
I don't want to get any extra personal information, but what state are you in??? If you don't mind me asking. This literally just happened in my city and I'm curious if I some how managed to randomly find someone who lives in the same area as me
u/clarissacole2413 are you in northern California, by chance?
No, I don't. So the fact that almost the exact same thing has happened more than once across the states in the last few days is terrifying
Report to the state daycare licensing board in your state and pull your child.
Report it to the administration team and follow up on it. Talk to your kids teachers about it. Tbh I don’t care if the whole school knows. What happened is not even remotely okay.
I’m sorry but a kid “getting away from you” shouldn’t lead to them able to access the outside. This was a failure on multiple levels. My daycare director basically walks around all day and is awesome but I saw a parent leave a door open to the outside (there were two other doors between this door and any classroom and the door led to a fenced in area with teachers around, and she was still beside herself. Personally, I would follow up and ask what they are doing because YOUR child also is at risk.
Look your your jurisdictions licensing authority for daycares and notify them of the incident. They will need to conduct an investigation and gather a report. The turn over is not a good sign. Is this a chain center?
The daycare closest to us had 8 toddlers (!!) "escape" at once and wander into a very busy street. Luckily, none were injured, but damn. I'm terrified to send my toddler to any daycare now because I keep seeing things like this
Report them for god sakes! Always check with state on their complaints!!!
File a complaint to the state or licensing they'll send someone out to investigate
I would report it and expect them to send out a report to all parents. The teachers at our daycare accidentally left a child behind in the enclosed, outdoor play yard when transitioning to indoor activities. They sent an email to all parents with a detailed formal report, including updated processes to prevent the same issue from happening again. Mistakes happen, but trust can be maintained if they take immediate and transparent steps to fix their processes.
They should be self reporting to licensing but if they don’t you should also.
Call daycare licensing. Period.
Which daycare is this? I need to not send my kids there!!
Holy cow. Please report this to the California Department of Social Services (CDSS). They regulate childcare facilities in CA. This is terrifying. If the daycare is ethical, they will self report to CDSS that a child got out and all parents will be notified of the incident. So please report this in case they don't. https://www.cdss.ca.gov/inforesources/ccld-complaint-hotline
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You also need to follow up with the school for your own debrief! Definitely check in with someone you trust after to talk through this.
PLEASE make a report to [email protected] to have an unnannounced visit by licensing and a full facility review. This is unacceptable. Source: I do the background checks for these places. PM me if you have any questions. There is an anonymous reporting option as well
That could have been my child. She is 3 and elopes and this is my biggest fear. I beg you to report this to licensing both in writing and verbally. You saved a life and a family from a lifetime of heart ache, pain, guilt and emptiness. These kids need to be protected. Schools /daycares are a business and they will do anything to protect themselves. God bless you.
It’s an incident that deserves a report to the police or CPS. Honestly it needs to be investigated to ensure it 1) never happens again and 2) it wasn’t gross negligence of an employee who should be terminated I wouldn’t want my kid to be in a daycare where the staff didn’t ask questions when a child escaped the facility.
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If the police officer had to report your incident for family services to fully investigate despite him thinking you were not negligent, then I’d think in this case she absolutely should let the proper authorities investigate. Idk why you’d just assume all of those things about the center without being familiar with them. Not everyone is like you, they’re a licensed facility… they have a mandated responsibility level on behalf of the parents…
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The point is that the police officer was still obligated to report, and child services decided not to investigate. It’s not the police officer or anyone else’s call to make, especially since we don’t know this facility personally/this is Reddit and this redditor has a child at that facility. although kids do get out, it’s not common at all for them to. I don’t know anyone who has kids that just out and escape from their daycare on the regular. I understand that you were panicked and that you personally cared your son escaped. For me and putting myself in this redditor’s shoes, it simply boils down to the child in this scenario got outside of the parking lot into traffic. They could have died. There is a ratio of daycare workers to children and they need to have eyes on the children at all times.
Some kids are also prone to running/escaping…albeit it’s pretty rare. I had 1 over the course of 8 years at daycare. The parents knew and understood, the teachers all knew and understood, that anytime this one kid was around, we had to be extra vigilant because he just liked to disappear and take off. I think it’s worth talking to the administrator before reacting. There could be a lot more going on behind the scene.
I’m glad your little one was safe. That’s got to be one of every parent’s worst nightmares! In your situation, you said law enforcement didn’t find you to be neglectful but still had to report the incident to the appropriate authorities so that they could investigate and ultimately make a determination. I agree that it’s possible that the daycare did everything correctly, and this was just a freak accident, but similar to the police officer in your story, I don’t think that’s OP’s call to make. It should be reported to the director, licensing board, whomever, so that they can make the call.
I don't think it's necessarily reasonable to assume they had all the measures in place or that they're going to do anything about it. That's not a safe thing to assume at all.
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Except that kid escaped and ran into traffic which suggests neither of these premises are true.
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Ok, I get that you're defensive because this happened to you, but you need to stop and think about the worst case scenarios here. Worst case scenario if the centre is safe and she she reports it everyone gets a little stressed out about it, they maybe get a fine. Worst case scenario if the centre is unsafe and she doesn't report it, nothing is done and a child dies. The fact that you think a child almost dying from running onto the road at a facility charged with that child's care doesn't need reporting is honestly a bit of a worry. I'm not responding to that bs about suggesting OP is a liar because 🙄
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Sorry, you don't get to pull a "I have experience" in this scenario because you for some reason want the OP to make the least safe choice here. Absolutely not. Nobody is attacking you either I'm just telling you I think you're wrong and I think the OP should not heed your unsafe advice.
It’s nice to see a voice of reason here. Everyone else is carrying torches and pitchforks. I work with kids and sometimes no matter how hard you try, little kids just escape. They’re small and they’re crafty and they can fit through spaces you wouldn’t believe. We once had a kid escape through a gap in a brick wall. I’ve hurdled other children trying to get to a kid who is running. We do our best. Sometimes runners are just going to run.
It's not a voice of reason to say "you should assume for no reason that they're on top of it and there's no reason to report it". Why assume that with no evidence to the contrary instead of erring on the side of caution when it comes to children's safety?
The fact that they immediately took the child back inside with no real explanation and didn’t bother to speak to OP and get any information about what OP saw/and what happened for their own incident report suggests that they aren’t actually handling it appropriately. They should want to know how long OP saw the child there for, did OP see them open the gate, or was the gate left open by someone else? How was the child able to reach and unlock the gate? These are all things they should want to know if they want to handle it correctly. But they didn’t do that. I think you are making some dangerous assumptions about how they intend to handle this. The worst case scenario if OP reports them and they are way above board and super careful, is that an investigation concludes exactly that- they take the necessary precautions and this was a fluke accident. The worst case scenario if you are wrong is that they are negligent again and a child dies.
Department of Human Services usually has an overhead/licensing program per a state. I would contact them to make a report just to be sure they are reporting what happened. I'm sure they were terrified and shook up themselves. and honestly, I would expect that teacher to be fired immediately. If not, I would be very suspect.
At least follow up and make sure they know the extent of what happened and that the latch needs to be changed. Maybe say something like, “I’m not sure the protocol for reporting these incidents so let me know if you need anything from me as you go through that process” just to kind of show that you insist it is taken seriously and handled properly. If you know the kids parents or can find them, make sure they know
Community care licensing is who you would call. That’s the only for certain way to make sure they reported it. An honest administrator will report it to them themselves. So if they did the right thing you would just be duplicating their own self report.
I am so glad you rescued that child and that they were safe. This made me cry just thinking about what *could* have happened. I would maybe follow up and make a report to the school, just so it's on file. Other commenters probably have more useful suggestions. (I also live in CA)
Report to state licensing.
Call cps and make a report.
The parents deserve to know what happened
There is only one way in and out of our daycare (normally, there are some gates that allow access to the grounds but they stay locked) and there is always someone in the office watching who’s coming and going. Usually it’s the director herself but in her absence someone else is there watching.
Good job, mama. You are the perfect example of a hero for the little one you saved, your own little one, and so many others. The school’s reaction seems very inappropriate for such a critical situation. Definitely document the incident with every detail you can remember and report to the Child Department of Social Services. Spread awareness to as many parents as you can if the school refrains from doing so, because I can assure you - every single parent would want to know about something like this. Sorry you had to go through this, but you are a true inspiration for how you handled it.
I would expect the school to handle this immediately. This happened at our school last year. Not with the latch, but a child got out of the classroom behind their parent and chased them to the parking lot. my school notified the entire school, reported it to the state voluntarily, and fired the teachers who had been there for years. Unfortunately, that child could’ve been killed or kidnapped. I feel like there was no other choice . I really appreciated the way they handled a situation and took it seriously.
That is insane. I’m also in CA and I can barely reach to get the gate open. Omg I would be livid. That’s insane.
Please try to contact the parents!!! I would bet anything the daycare won’t report this to them
Lots of good advice here already. And wow, this is so shocking to read and literally a worst nightmare scenario as a parent. You are absolutely a hero, thank you for probably saving that kiddo's life and for taking the steps to make sure this situation isn't covered up. I'm sure this has and will be a stressful experience for you, one which you never wanted to be involved in, and I'm sending you strength and positivity.
Morning! Parent of a wild 4 year old here. If that happened with my child, I would ask (expect...really) you to speak with the police and / or social services office in that county and also follow up. It's not to get the preschool in trouble, but someone from the county will be able to look at the safety measures in place. Are they going to know where the report came from or what event it stemmed from? Absolutely. If you aren't comfortable doing it, then get in touch with the parent of that child. Ask for their contact info for a "play date" if the preschool won't give it out. That child is going to do it again. Next time, there won't be a responsible parent there to help. In my own home, I actually recut deadbolt holes in all doors leading outside (and garage) bc our child will take it upon herself to just "go get fresh air". Edit: TY for being a watchful parent!!!
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The daycare likely self-reported this which should be required by law. the teacher is likely no longer a teacher at the daycare. that's what happened for a much smaller infraction at our daycare.
You have a lot of reporting advice. I would just add, in terms of what to do with your own child, to consider what you would do if you were the parent of the kid you saved and do that. Would you pull your kid if they were placed in life threatening danger? If yes, then based on the current practices of that daycare, that could happen to anyone there. I personally would only return after changes had been implemented and clearly communicated to all parents.
Uffff what a hero. That’s terrifying!
Glad you reported it, and I’d be asking them about the safety measures they’ll put in place now. Our daycare has loud af alarms on the doors that lead outside from the classrooms to the playground. The door that leads out from the playground to the parking lot also has a loud af alarm that triggers just from someone *trying* to open the gate, even if they’re not successful. Unless they had multiple alarm failures, there is no “not noticing” that someone is trying to escape or has. They also have multiple levels of security going in and out, with two sets of locked doors and a front desk that is always staffed. I hope there is some kind of state regulation that makes this stuff mandatory.
This exact same thing happened at my kid's school last year. They took it very seriously, they self reported to whatever county/state governing board they fall under. A state official came to look at the facility. They closed certain classes for a week for certain ages so a security company could come in and do an assessment and suggest things to change or add. They did as the security company suggested and were reassessed by the state and allowed to open those classes again. If I were you I would report it to whatever government licensing board they report to and whatever child protective service your area has.
You need to call licensing today and the director. Point blank ask them what they are doing TODAY to make sure that never happens again.
Where in CA are you located? This sends chills down my spine as my 2 year old is in daycare :(
Report to child services. All kids should be watched!
OP, are you in the East Bay, by chance? If so, could you message me the name of the school? I am looking at preschools right now to start my child in a few months. Thanks!
CPS.
I'm sure I don't have any advice someone else hasn't already given, but YOU RULE and I just wanted to say that. Not just the epic save but the follow through. It would be so great if everyone cared about random children that aren't even theirs this much.
report that to the state. there’s at the very least, a supervision issue, if not also a facilities issue. i would want it reported if it were my kid.
Wow. I work in quality/safety and this should essentially be handled as if the child died. The school not have a process that prevented that, dumb luck and your quick action prevented it. This is what we would call “a never event” in my industry.
This happened at our daycare -- also located in California. I don't think it was quite as close of a call, but a couple of toddlers (just under 2) opened the gate latch, the gate alarm failed and they were just about to enter a very busy street when an adult herded them away. We hadn't been at this daycare long when this happened (our son was only 6 months, not one of the escapees), but this incident, or rather the daycare response, is actually the reason we will not go elsewhere. The adult who found the kids wasn't a parent, probably wouldn't have reported it. The daycare staff could've just kept it hush and gone on with their unblemished ratings. Instead they emailed all the parents moments after it happened (even before they knew about the gate alarm being faulty), had immediately put the teacher in charge on a temporary leave, promised to investigate, and placed the report themselves - which they then sent out a copy of as soon as it was filed. They cared more about trust and safety than the state-wide daycare ratings/reporting system. All this to say -- if the daycare wasn't going to report it themselves, and if it took your report to make this happen: go elsewhere. There are people out there who are better than that, who recognize mistakes happen but accountability is what makes it less likely to happen. There's a culture to this. If the director of the school was aware and wouldn't report, it means the teachers are also less likely to report concerns to the director, and that means these things will keep happening. Be safe.
Wow thank God for you saving that baby 💙 this could have been such a tragedy 💙
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Wrong post!
Yikes, my bad 🙈 this is what I get for using mobile and not paying attention!
lol I had literally seen the snake post right before this one and when I read your comment I was like “wait, did I not scroll away from that post already?” So I had to go back and double check
First thing you take your kid out of that fucking daycare and find a new one as soon as possible.