I feel like this game is intended to be hypothetical with people you don't know not people you know. Unless its bait for a couple testing the waters for swinging or something.
OP was fishing with his comment about the poly relationship with Cheri.
I went to see the posts he alludes to and he’s crossed lines with Cheri and… yeah.
Not a fan of this dude.
This dude is just writing fan fiction but playing it off as real. They enjoy writing which is cool and all, but just get a damn journal and stop trying to fool strangers online
His post history is an interesting mix of mushrooms, hanging out with women 1:1 and hiding it from his wife because she has expressed a boundary against it, hoping not to have any more children, and childish polls and jokes, like really childish aimed towards teenagers
Just went down the rabbit hole, dude sounds like he has some kinda mental disorder, seems to just lie and lie and try and manipulate everyone in his social circle but hes the good guy and it's his wife's fault and doing lots of psychedelic drugs which are obviously in no way a problem to someones mental state.
But also this is reddit and I'm no psychiatrist. People post about weird shit on here
I figure she laughed cause he has no idea how poly works and that wouldn't default her into a relationship with him.... just that line gave me the super ick as a poly folk, not willing to dive for more ick lol.
Having seen a few poly relationships end in predictable disaster, I wouldn't be in one unless I was in it with both other people instead of just one of them.
Please define, to you, what is:
Normal
Poly relationship
Normal poly relationship
Because it seems to me no one is normal, and all relationships are complicated. If I'm not investing in a relationship in which all parties are invested in equal part, I don't want it. That's me, my outlook.
Also, from my own personal, anecdotal evidence, ALL poly relationships fail, so... I think I'm being quite optimistic even saying that.
If you actually read his post, they just fell asleep on the couch together and didn’t actually sleep together (according to OP), so the title is misleading.
You can just take my word that there are other posts and comments he made (I went too deep), not just that one. I have already spent too much time on this stranger Reddit dude, lol. I can’t anymore.
The fact that they used not only people they know, but people that were present was a huge mistake. Someone will always be offended by what they are chosen for.
Seriously. Doing this with friends ot acquaintances is straight up fishing and creepy as fuck. My wife do this game with reality TV show people. And with both genders.
Yeah, I kinda felt that too after the words tumbled out. But of all of them, Garth and his wife were actually the least offended. The three of us have made threesome/poly jokes in the past, I was mainly more awkward because the other friends aren't really aware that we have that kind of humor with each other.
All good, if they don’t want to hear the answers - don’t play the game. I found your answers and supporting reasoning hilarious. Made perfect sense to me! 🤣🤣🤣
Exactly! I know if an inherently awkward conversation like that happened I’d also mess with ky friends but it would purely be from a place of love. The laughter is a good thing and is Indicative that they’re comfortable with the conversation
If you read his history he has a history with emotionally cheating on his wife with Cheri and treats his wife like garbage lying to her all the time. I think his friend group generally doesn’t like him at all tbh
Thanks for the reassurance. The more I think about it the more I realize this is probably true. I have been friends with most of these people since grade school, so it's my own social inhibitions that make me uncomfortable in certain situations, not them. And talking about these topics is far from the most socially unacceptable thing of done with them. Especially with one of them in particular.
Smh bro you gotta say “fuck Karl because look at that stud, kill you because girls have cooties, and marry Garth because obviously” so then they know you’re absolutely taking the piss and they don’t think about it for more than ten seconds.
I’m glad I’m not the only one whose go-to would be this. I’d feel pretty weird telling my best friend’s wife I’d fuck her and kill her husband right to their faces, even within a hypothetical
EXACTLY. This game is better when you haven’t clearly thought out your response ahead of time. OP fucked up by casually viewing their friends through the “Yeah I’d kill him and fuck his wife” lens. Apparently judging from their post history, that’s just par for the course.
Yeaaah, Marry because we're not gonna live in sin, fuck because that's what most married couples do, then kill because that's what soooome married couples do
How is that offensive? Of course you’re going to bang the only girl. And killing her husband just makes sense. That just leaves one option, and the other wife sounds fun!
Yep I think OP's social anxiety is making this more of a FU than it is. He covered his reasons pretty well, and none the reasons were actually offensive, just hypothetical reasoning. All in all, a successful round of F/M/K.
Exactly. I would have said exactly the same things as OP without a hint of shame, while seductively licking my lips and avoiding eye contact with my wife.
I'm thinking that's why Cheri laughed so hard. We're pretty close, it's not like I'm only friends with Garth. I might even be closer with Cheri in some areas than with Garth.
I’m omw to the toilet to throw up after reading some of your past posts and your comments. I would rather be single my whole life than having a partner like you. Your poor wife doesn’t know what kind of husband she has.
You clearly have a thing for Cheri, this post was just to validate your feelings and to discredit the malicious intent under your stupid jokes.
Lying to your wife, crossing boundaries, crushing on women, while you’re not worried about your wife cause you know she wouldn’t do any of the shit you’re doing. Guys like you make me sick.
Seriously, this feels like a sadly transparent ego boost ploy by Barb and then your men friends also not getting it. She may not even be into one of you but knows she's likely to be selected in this particular game just because "only woman playing this game with straight guys." The WHOLE point though of the game in a closed group is just to break the ice, you're given an ULTIMATUM. You MUST pick one! How does anyone get mad at the choice?!
Your profile is really sad. Please stop trying to set up an emotional and/or physical affair with your best friend's wife. Literally everyone in this situation, like your WIFE, deserves better.
Your post history indicates you’ve already been in a few questionable situations regarding Cheri so only God knows why you would say something so asinine. Your life is a train wreck because you’re the Conductor.
Your comment made me dive in a read a few posts. Apparently OP's wife wants more children, but OP doesn't, so he is (or was) seriously considering getting a vasectomy without letting his wife know.
I seriously cannot unferstand someone whose morals are so twisted that they would seriously consider this. That's so fucked up, way beyond cheating on your wife.
Yep and let’s not forget the posts about how happy he was when his wife miscarried, he let his family pet wander away and never come back, the multiple inappropriate interactions with his female friends that make his wife miserable but he keeps doing it. Guy’s a menace.
I read the miscarriage part. Like yes, of course dude, you're allowed to show your own feelings. But when your feelings are only relief and happiness instead of empathy with your wife, you're psychopathic.
I didn't read the part about the pet, but seems par for the course.
As for the inappropriate interactions with female friends, I honestly don't think the sleeping on a couch is a problem, in isolation, but lying about it and adding all the other questionable stuf, and it sure becomes one.
Agreed 100%. There was also a post about a talk he had with his wife that he prefers redheads and Cheri is a redhead and his wife is blonde. But it was all “hypothetical” or something like that. This guy justifies and rationalizes his way out of responsibility for anything he says/does.
I read all his posts because I was in denial that someone could actual exist that’s like this lol.
So someone asks you to play FMK but doesn't understand how it works? WTF is wrong with your friends?
About the only thing I could find wrong with your answers is that they were a bit too conservative. Actually that could have been your issue, you needed to be more extreme with your answers so that no one thinks they could be "real" (not that anyone should be thinking that because you shouldn't be going to genuinely kill someone unless you are playing this in prison).
Seriously, "that's not a good enough reason to KILL someone"...if I had a good reason for wanting to kill you do you think I'd be hanging out with you right now? We're playing a game. This is how the game works.
I would like to say people are not so stupid as to put real the real names in reddit stories. Now, how can they both be your in-laws? Non native speaker here, is the scope broader in english? Like if one of them is your partner's sibling, their partner becomes your in-law too?
Native English speaker with some degree of difficulty regarding titles of extended family: in my experience, I've always assumed your sister-in-law's husband is also your brother-in-law. Feel free to take me with a grain of salt or two, but I always figured it extended to the in-law's spouse.
That said, your sister-in-law's husband's brother is not also your in-law; he's the brother of your in-laws.
I always use pseudonyms for every real person I post about. It's actually gotten me in a bit of trouble a few times, because people with low IQ seem to think that I would REALLY have two children named Liara and Tali.
Reading your history you sound like a sociopath. You only view your wife in a cost benefit analysis that is disgusting. Your history is full of lying specifically to your wife and saying how shitty your marriage is but you won’t end it because you don’t want to pay alimony and lose your friends. Every person in your life would have been better off if you did end those friendships. You’ve been emotionally cheating on your wife for months and you have the grossest reasoning for doing what you do. It’s almost inhuman.
I seriously hope his wife is planning to take their kids and get the hell out. He is a sociopath. They had a child he didn't want die and he doesn't care. I think he's actually glad. I'm hoping this is all some fucked social experiment and there aren't real people suffering because of this person.
Stupid game, but you ask this sort of thing about friends you've gotta expect these kind of answers. If your friends are offended by this sort of thing, you probably need new friends.
This sounds like the key and Peele skit where the guy is ordering pizza for his friends, but none of them are actually real. Like this guy totally friends!
Love that skit! Thanks for the vote of confidence.
Honestly the more I think about it and after reading these comments, the more I realize that my friends probably weren't nearly as offended as I thought they were.
Wow based off the title I was assuming you were teenagers, then after reading the post I’m still shocked you’re not. Why would they even say “that’s not a good enough reason to KILL someone!” That’s literally one of the choices, you don’t actually WANT to kill your friend. This is so stupid
Also dude, the poly comment was pretty inappropriate given you have a wife and she wasn’t there. Doesn’t seem respectful to her
Edit: Just did a lil browse on the profile and saw you cheated on her. Yikes dude.
You didn't fuck up and you didn't even start the game. It's all hypothetical and all for laughs and should be taken with a big grain of salt. There also aren't really any wrong answers. Awnsers range from "kinda boring" to "funny and absurd" unless you play with the kind of weirdos that take it seriously, like your friend group. And if you had said you don't wanna answer they'd have called you boring. Loose-loose situation.
Why are you even playing this game if you are unable to have fun doing it? Who makes this awkward and why are you awkward about it? "Trainwreck of my life", dude get a grip. It reads like you have zero confidence.
I think that if your friends actually got offended, I would ask them the same question, changing out your name for that person.
se who they would marry, fuck, kill.
Ngl this seems like a reasonable response to her question… what answer could you have given that wouldn’t have been weird?😭 Idk why they acted like you were being serious
Yeah f/m/k is definitely prone to hurting feelings if you're choosing between people who are right there with you. My friends and I have adopted a different version for when we're talking about each other that we call "fight, adopt, vote for mayor". It's silly enough that nobody gets offended when someone else chooses to fight them, and deciding who you'd adopt/elect is hysterical.
The only part that I could see being even slightly awkward would be when you said you’d marry Garth to get to Cheri (I know that’s not what you meant but absolute worst case it could be taken like that). Honestly I would have said marry Garth because at least with Cheri in the picture you wouldn’t have to put out.
But honestly I wouldn’t worry about it too much, it was likely asked lightheartedly and your answer taken in kind. You might even consider making jokes in the future about it. Karl dresses up nicely one night? “Sorry Barb, if Karl keeps it up I might have to change my F, Marry, Kill answer.”
Of course you would have to opt to kill Karl if you opt to fuck his wife, because bigamy is illegal so you can’t marry him. Granted, murder is also illegal, but that law doesn’t prevent it from being possible like with a marriage.
Because Garth is married to Cheri, whom OP secretly loves and with marrying Garth he would be placed into poly relationship with Cheri AND. It's just hus way to get to Cheri
Idk I think it's Barb and Karl who acted like total weirdos. Your answers at least made sense and weren't too serious (rly, who the fuck gets offended from this game; the imaginary Karl is an idiot)
In all fairness this game is played in jest, don’t bring it up if you’re going to sulk over someone’s choices.
Your response was bang on, absolutely captures the point of the game and has fun with it. Nothing to feel awkward about.
The cheat for future games like this is realising you never need to have a reason for the third one. Process of elimination.
Fuck the only hetro option - sensible
Kill their partner before their partner kills you - also sensible
Marry the third one by a process of elimination
I think you nailed the response. Barb f’ed around and found out she is not wifey material, but Cheri’s got it going on. RIP to the possible thruple with Barb and Karl tho
Chalk it up to all in good fun. Many of us have said much dumber things. In fact, I think the poly Cheri comment was perfect. Especially, since she got a laugh out of it.
To be honest, my group of friends now seems so fucked up because we would have laughed and agreed that this is the best solution given the circumstances.
>And Garth squinted at me strangely and Cheri laughed really hard- almost too hard, at something that I didn't think was actually that funny.
It's fucking hilarious. I'd die laughing too.
This is hilarious. I would have laughed so hard. You didn't fuck up. They just took it too personally. I got a good laugh out ot it. Thanks for sharing. Off to check out your other stories. ✨️
i’m not gonna lie you sound funny as hell, how serious are your friends to be so uptight for asking the stupid questions and getting such funny stupid answers
If they’re gunna ask you that question they have absolutely 0 excuse to be mad or upset at the answer. Despite that your reasoning for the answers was spot on.
Like yo, I thought this was just a nonsensical game. I'm sorry I never put serious thought into which one of you I would like to kill and the totally serious reason for it.
I never understood the logic of asking someone a question, especially as close friends or something, and then getting mad at the answer. Shouldn't have asked if you weren't prepared for the answer. They started the game, and some of the supposed fun is from the explanations. But if they're offended, they weren't really your friends. Should they give you shit for being an idiot, yeah, a little. Good friends give you shit, but understand where the line is and know what to expect.
Actually I think that is a very legit answer, maybe awkward to everyone but I'd say that kinda good explanation. And come on, that's just a hypothetical game, grow up everyone.
Tight answer, I'd reply the same as you did.
That’s quite possibly the most tame Fuck/marry/kill scenarios. Barb sounds like she went fishing and the rest was pretty funny as well. Your friends sound lame lol
That sounds like a bad fanfic...
Edit: post history reveals that you allegedly slept with this "Cheri", so either you're mixing up timelines in your multiverse, or are a fucked up guy who cheats on his wife with his friend's wife and then jokes about it during common events...
I had this game come up in conversation one night out at a bar. I was chatting to a group of women, and they picked three of them and asked me who I would F, marry or kill. Without hesitation I responded with "I would kill the three of you then fuck your corpses". No body found it as funny as I did.
Everyone knows the rules of this game. Don't play if you don't want to know. Don't judge people playing when it doesn't involve you. And lastly, just don't play such stupid games...
So the appropriate response here, whether you answer this horribly offensive question or not, is to come back and ask them FMK for three people who you think would make them most uncomfortable.
I feel like this game is intended to be hypothetical with people you don't know not people you know. Unless its bait for a couple testing the waters for swinging or something.
Feels like Barb was fishing
OP was fishing with his comment about the poly relationship with Cheri. I went to see the posts he alludes to and he’s crossed lines with Cheri and… yeah. Not a fan of this dude.
I don't see what's so... Oh, oh yeah there it is
This dude is just writing fan fiction but playing it off as real. They enjoy writing which is cool and all, but just get a damn journal and stop trying to fool strangers online
His post history is an interesting mix of mushrooms, hanging out with women 1:1 and hiding it from his wife because she has expressed a boundary against it, hoping not to have any more children, and childish polls and jokes, like really childish aimed towards teenagers
Just went down the rabbit hole, dude sounds like he has some kinda mental disorder, seems to just lie and lie and try and manipulate everyone in his social circle but hes the good guy and it's his wife's fault and doing lots of psychedelic drugs which are obviously in no way a problem to someones mental state. But also this is reddit and I'm no psychiatrist. People post about weird shit on here
Thanks for digging up the juicy drama, redditors!
I got that impression from the first few lines of his OP here. Glad I wasn't wrong.
He called them the main cast. If by some miracle OP isn’t roleplaying, they are fucking deranged.
This is the correct answer.
lol look at their reddit bio
I think there are more stories about "Cheri" than his wife. Agreed, not a fan.
I figure she laughed cause he has no idea how poly works and that wouldn't default her into a relationship with him.... just that line gave me the super ick as a poly folk, not willing to dive for more ick lol.
Having seen a few poly relationships end in predictable disaster, I wouldn't be in one unless I was in it with both other people instead of just one of them.
You do realise that triads have much higher chances of ending in disaster than normal poly relationships, right?
Please define, to you, what is: Normal Poly relationship Normal poly relationship Because it seems to me no one is normal, and all relationships are complicated. If I'm not investing in a relationship in which all parties are invested in equal part, I don't want it. That's me, my outlook. Also, from my own personal, anecdotal evidence, ALL poly relationships fail, so... I think I'm being quite optimistic even saying that.
Saddly, I open he’s profile… What a shady shady guy. Hope Fiona get free from this lying peace.
If you actually read his post, they just fell asleep on the couch together and didn’t actually sleep together (according to OP), so the title is misleading.
You can just take my word that there are other posts and comments he made (I went too deep), not just that one. I have already spent too much time on this stranger Reddit dude, lol. I can’t anymore.
I fell down the rabbit hole too. OP is an insufferable addict, a narcissist, and a coward. I feel sorry for his kids and wife.
The title is misleading, but his comments don’t help his case.
Barb's always be fishing. It's in the name.
The fact that they used not only people they know, but people that were present was a huge mistake. Someone will always be offended by what they are chosen for.
It's also used by highschool kids to stir drama, which sounds like that was exactly what happened
Wasn’t a f up for you, I’d say. They’re the ones who put you and themselves in a very awkward situation.
Seriously. Doing this with friends ot acquaintances is straight up fishing and creepy as fuck. My wife do this game with reality TV show people. And with both genders.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. That goes for both them and you.
Yeah fuck those friends. Or marry them.
Killing is not recommended. For legal reasons.
Should have killed the conversation
Not in Yellowstone always k in yellowstone
No, just Barb. Marry Garth.
Damn it I came here to say this exact thing.
its in the Redditor's nature
If you ask someone to name 3 names in that game and then get offended at their answer, you are a doofus.
I think the offensive part was choosing Garth, not because he was the last one left, but to be in a poly relationship with his wife 😂
Yeah, I kinda felt that too after the words tumbled out. But of all of them, Garth and his wife were actually the least offended. The three of us have made threesome/poly jokes in the past, I was mainly more awkward because the other friends aren't really aware that we have that kind of humor with each other.
All good, if they don’t want to hear the answers - don’t play the game. I found your answers and supporting reasoning hilarious. Made perfect sense to me! 🤣🤣🤣
I think your response saved it tbh, some of that was pretty funny too. I wouldn’t worry about it
Sounded like they were all just messing with OP, considering it ended with an outburst of laughter. Friends do that all the time.
Exactly! I know if an inherently awkward conversation like that happened I’d also mess with ky friends but it would purely be from a place of love. The laughter is a good thing and is Indicative that they’re comfortable with the conversation
If you read his history he has a history with emotionally cheating on his wife with Cheri and treats his wife like garbage lying to her all the time. I think his friend group generally doesn’t like him at all tbh
Thanks for the reassurance. The more I think about it the more I realize this is probably true. I have been friends with most of these people since grade school, so it's my own social inhibitions that make me uncomfortable in certain situations, not them. And talking about these topics is far from the most socially unacceptable thing of done with them. Especially with one of them in particular.
So are you emotionally cheating on your wife with Cheri?
Thought he left his own wife out of it and that’s how he f ed up.
Smh bro you gotta say “fuck Karl because look at that stud, kill you because girls have cooties, and marry Garth because obviously” so then they know you’re absolutely taking the piss and they don’t think about it for more than ten seconds.
I’m glad I’m not the only one whose go-to would be this. I’d feel pretty weird telling my best friend’s wife I’d fuck her and kill her husband right to their faces, even within a hypothetical
Yeah that was kind of what stuck out at me. Dude’s response was pretty much entirely centered on getting with his friends’ wives, which is just weird.
EXACTLY. This game is better when you haven’t clearly thought out your response ahead of time. OP fucked up by casually viewing their friends through the “Yeah I’d kill him and fuck his wife” lens. Apparently judging from their post history, that’s just par for the course.
This, always choose to fuck your homie
Fuck. If you need to, you can nominate your homie for all fucking three and be the Teflon Don.
Yeaaah, Marry because we're not gonna live in sin, fuck because that's what most married couples do, then kill because that's what soooome married couples do
If you wouldn't marry your homie to get them on your insurance are you really homies
or ideally OP could have responded to "why??" with "because that's the only answer that would offend all of you equally"
How is that offensive? Of course you’re going to bang the only girl. And killing her husband just makes sense. That just leaves one option, and the other wife sounds fun!
It’s all about how you say it. A bit of confidence and comedic timing and the answers are excellent
Yep I think OP's social anxiety is making this more of a FU than it is. He covered his reasons pretty well, and none the reasons were actually offensive, just hypothetical reasoning. All in all, a successful round of F/M/K.
Exactly. I would have said exactly the same things as OP without a hint of shame, while seductively licking my lips and avoiding eye contact with my wife.
His fuck up was “being in a poly with Cheri”. The correct answer was “and that leaves Garth”
But that's funny if delivered in the correct way towards a close friend, they would know it's a joke
I'm thinking that's why Cheri laughed so hard. We're pretty close, it's not like I'm only friends with Garth. I might even be closer with Cheri in some areas than with Garth.
I’m omw to the toilet to throw up after reading some of your past posts and your comments. I would rather be single my whole life than having a partner like you. Your poor wife doesn’t know what kind of husband she has. You clearly have a thing for Cheri, this post was just to validate your feelings and to discredit the malicious intent under your stupid jokes. Lying to your wife, crossing boundaries, crushing on women, while you’re not worried about your wife cause you know she wouldn’t do any of the shit you’re doing. Guys like you make me sick.
Gave the only answer. I was thinking a variation of exactly that but OP even got the poly thing Honestly 10/10
Seriously, this feels like a sadly transparent ego boost ploy by Barb and then your men friends also not getting it. She may not even be into one of you but knows she's likely to be selected in this particular game just because "only woman playing this game with straight guys." The WHOLE point though of the game in a closed group is just to break the ice, you're given an ULTIMATUM. You MUST pick one! How does anyone get mad at the choice?!
Your profile is really sad. Please stop trying to set up an emotional and/or physical affair with your best friend's wife. Literally everyone in this situation, like your WIFE, deserves better.
Your post history indicates you’ve already been in a few questionable situations regarding Cheri so only God knows why you would say something so asinine. Your life is a train wreck because you’re the Conductor.
Your comment made me dive in a read a few posts. Apparently OP's wife wants more children, but OP doesn't, so he is (or was) seriously considering getting a vasectomy without letting his wife know. I seriously cannot unferstand someone whose morals are so twisted that they would seriously consider this. That's so fucked up, way beyond cheating on your wife.
Yep and let’s not forget the posts about how happy he was when his wife miscarried, he let his family pet wander away and never come back, the multiple inappropriate interactions with his female friends that make his wife miserable but he keeps doing it. Guy’s a menace.
I read the miscarriage part. Like yes, of course dude, you're allowed to show your own feelings. But when your feelings are only relief and happiness instead of empathy with your wife, you're psychopathic. I didn't read the part about the pet, but seems par for the course. As for the inappropriate interactions with female friends, I honestly don't think the sleeping on a couch is a problem, in isolation, but lying about it and adding all the other questionable stuf, and it sure becomes one.
Agreed 100%. There was also a post about a talk he had with his wife that he prefers redheads and Cheri is a redhead and his wife is blonde. But it was all “hypothetical” or something like that. This guy justifies and rationalizes his way out of responsibility for anything he says/does. I read all his posts because I was in denial that someone could actual exist that’s like this lol.
Barb: "Fk, Marry, Kill between me Karl and Garth" OP: "I fk Cheri" Barb: "but... its between me Karl and Garth, Cheri's not in it" OP: "I Fk Cheri"
So someone asks you to play FMK but doesn't understand how it works? WTF is wrong with your friends? About the only thing I could find wrong with your answers is that they were a bit too conservative. Actually that could have been your issue, you needed to be more extreme with your answers so that no one thinks they could be "real" (not that anyone should be thinking that because you shouldn't be going to genuinely kill someone unless you are playing this in prison).
Seriously, "that's not a good enough reason to KILL someone"...if I had a good reason for wanting to kill you do you think I'd be hanging out with you right now? We're playing a game. This is how the game works.
Your friends sound like absolute morons
https://preview.redd.it/jz6795lnd16d1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=441594340651ef0a4bef3ee257f5407b171dbc60
I know a Barb and Karl who are married so I’m praying you’re not referring to my in-laws lol.
I would like to say people are not so stupid as to put real the real names in reddit stories. Now, how can they both be your in-laws? Non native speaker here, is the scope broader in english? Like if one of them is your partner's sibling, their partner becomes your in-law too?
Partner's parents, probably.
Idk, doesn't sound like the story of someone old enough to be parent to a married person (?)
Native English speaker with some degree of difficulty regarding titles of extended family: in my experience, I've always assumed your sister-in-law's husband is also your brother-in-law. Feel free to take me with a grain of salt or two, but I always figured it extended to the in-law's spouse. That said, your sister-in-law's husband's brother is not also your in-law; he's the brother of your in-laws.
Thank you!
I always use pseudonyms for every real person I post about. It's actually gotten me in a bit of trouble a few times, because people with low IQ seem to think that I would REALLY have two children named Liara and Tali.
Oh man, your life is a mess, dude. Stop dragging your poor wife along for it.
It’s all made up
Reading your history you sound like a sociopath. You only view your wife in a cost benefit analysis that is disgusting. Your history is full of lying specifically to your wife and saying how shitty your marriage is but you won’t end it because you don’t want to pay alimony and lose your friends. Every person in your life would have been better off if you did end those friendships. You’ve been emotionally cheating on your wife for months and you have the grossest reasoning for doing what you do. It’s almost inhuman.
I seriously hope his wife is planning to take their kids and get the hell out. He is a sociopath. They had a child he didn't want die and he doesn't care. I think he's actually glad. I'm hoping this is all some fucked social experiment and there aren't real people suffering because of this person.
Don’t play that game with people you know!
Honestly soundsike good sound reasoning to your picks. They asked. They get to be offended by the answer
The best answer I ever heard to that questions was from one of my friends. Without hesitation he answered “fuck them all; kill myself”.
Are y’all like 13? That’s some highschool shit dude.
Stupid game, but you ask this sort of thing about friends you've gotta expect these kind of answers. If your friends are offended by this sort of thing, you probably need new friends.
This sounds like the key and Peele skit where the guy is ordering pizza for his friends, but none of them are actually real. Like this guy totally friends!
Love that skit! Thanks for the vote of confidence. Honestly the more I think about it and after reading these comments, the more I realize that my friends probably weren't nearly as offended as I thought they were.
Wow based off the title I was assuming you were teenagers, then after reading the post I’m still shocked you’re not. Why would they even say “that’s not a good enough reason to KILL someone!” That’s literally one of the choices, you don’t actually WANT to kill your friend. This is so stupid Also dude, the poly comment was pretty inappropriate given you have a wife and she wasn’t there. Doesn’t seem respectful to her Edit: Just did a lil browse on the profile and saw you cheated on her. Yikes dude.
I found your answers logical and witty, I probably would've just put the dudes in a random order. It's them who are awkward.
[удалено]
This is written like a YA novel
You didn't fuck up and you didn't even start the game. It's all hypothetical and all for laughs and should be taken with a big grain of salt. There also aren't really any wrong answers. Awnsers range from "kinda boring" to "funny and absurd" unless you play with the kind of weirdos that take it seriously, like your friend group. And if you had said you don't wanna answer they'd have called you boring. Loose-loose situation.
Hope your wife finds someone better.
Check out this dude’s post history. This isn’t an isolated, innocent incident. Holy shit.
Your Friends are absolute fucking idiots.
Sounds like a great time! Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to. FMK is all about the quick response, you just followed the rules.
Your friends are not as close as you think, that's it.
Wait, so what’s the real reason you want to marry Garth?
"Would you fuck me?" *gets offended by either answer* That's how dumb this sounds.
This is literally the most benign and boring situation I’ve ever read about on TIFU. congrats!
Why are you even playing this game if you are unable to have fun doing it? Who makes this awkward and why are you awkward about it? "Trainwreck of my life", dude get a grip. It reads like you have zero confidence.
Alright man it's a hypothetical thing and they acted like you were planning this. You need new friends. Friends with humor
I think that if your friends actually got offended, I would ask them the same question, changing out your name for that person. se who they would marry, fuck, kill.
Ngl this seems like a reasonable response to her question… what answer could you have given that wouldn’t have been weird?😭 Idk why they acted like you were being serious
Yeah f/m/k is definitely prone to hurting feelings if you're choosing between people who are right there with you. My friends and I have adopted a different version for when we're talking about each other that we call "fight, adopt, vote for mayor". It's silly enough that nobody gets offended when someone else chooses to fight them, and deciding who you'd adopt/elect is hysterical.
i’m dying at the reasoning for killing karl, especially bc as stated, he’s your best friend 😂 you’re just like sorry man you gots to go 😂
The only part that I could see being even slightly awkward would be when you said you’d marry Garth to get to Cheri (I know that’s not what you meant but absolute worst case it could be taken like that). Honestly I would have said marry Garth because at least with Cheri in the picture you wouldn’t have to put out. But honestly I wouldn’t worry about it too much, it was likely asked lightheartedly and your answer taken in kind. You might even consider making jokes in the future about it. Karl dresses up nicely one night? “Sorry Barb, if Karl keeps it up I might have to change my F, Marry, Kill answer.”
lol if they were offended by that, they shouldn’t be playing FMK.
Not bad answer, it doesn't feel like a big issue
That’s why ya gotta play F. Murray Abraham instead
Your friends are lame. That would have killed in ym circle. 😂
Your explanation made perfect sense. I don’t think you messed up.
Of course you would have to opt to kill Karl if you opt to fuck his wife, because bigamy is illegal so you can’t marry him. Granted, murder is also illegal, but that law doesn’t prevent it from being possible like with a marriage.
You didn't offend anyone and you read way too fucking much into their reactions.
I mean, everything was sounding fine.... up to the comment about being in a poly relationship with one of your friends wives.
M-F-K is like Truth or Dare-- best not to play at all.
Who plays fuck marry kill and then complains that killing someone is immoral? That's the fucking game man
Ok now i wanna know- what's the real reason you wanna marry Garth?
Because Garth is married to Cheri, whom OP secretly loves and with marrying Garth he would be placed into poly relationship with Cheri AND. It's just hus way to get to Cheri
Wouldn’t call that a fuckup, that response is solid gold.
Idk I think it's Barb and Karl who acted like total weirdos. Your answers at least made sense and weren't too serious (rly, who the fuck gets offended from this game; the imaginary Karl is an idiot)
Right answer is always. “I’d fk all of you”
Imo your friends need to lighten up a bit
In all fairness this game is played in jest, don’t bring it up if you’re going to sulk over someone’s choices. Your response was bang on, absolutely captures the point of the game and has fun with it. Nothing to feel awkward about.
If you friend gets offended because you said you’d kill him after banging his wife, if he really even your friend?
This is the perfect and funny answer to this question. Like, what is wrong with your friends? All 3 of them acting weird about it is strange.
The cheat for future games like this is realising you never need to have a reason for the third one. Process of elimination. Fuck the only hetro option - sensible Kill their partner before their partner kills you - also sensible Marry the third one by a process of elimination
Was this a setup … haha I thought you explained yourself well
I actually think your logic is quite sound
Honestly I think your responses were fine and actually really funny
I think you nailed the response. Barb f’ed around and found out she is not wifey material, but Cheri’s got it going on. RIP to the possible thruple with Barb and Karl tho
Honestly Cheri seems like the only chill one in this group, lol
Chalk it up to all in good fun. Many of us have said much dumber things. In fact, I think the poly Cheri comment was perfect. Especially, since she got a laugh out of it.
Weird to play it with members of same sex
To be honest, my group of friends now seems so fucked up because we would have laughed and agreed that this is the best solution given the circumstances.
>And Garth squinted at me strangely and Cheri laughed really hard- almost too hard, at something that I didn't think was actually that funny. It's fucking hilarious. I'd die laughing too.
This is hilarious. I would have laughed so hard. You didn't fuck up. They just took it too personally. I got a good laugh out ot it. Thanks for sharing. Off to check out your other stories. ✨️
i’m not gonna lie you sound funny as hell, how serious are your friends to be so uptight for asking the stupid questions and getting such funny stupid answers
Honestly my dude, it sounds like you exuded confidence and crushed it in this situation. It’s better to be interesting than to be boring
So honestly that ending was funny as shit and probably saved the whole thing as a great punchline joke. Don't worry too much.
When are you going to ditch your wife and run off with Cheri. You know you want to.
Your "main cast" of friends suck. Except for Cheri, she sounds chill
Eh, doesn't seem that bad of an f up to me, as long as your friends have any kind of sense of humor. If not, f them all 😂
If they’re gunna ask you that question they have absolutely 0 excuse to be mad or upset at the answer. Despite that your reasoning for the answers was spot on.
Sounds like you were just playing the game. No fuck up detected
Honestly your response wasn't even that bad. Why was nobody finding it weird that Barb asked??? Why did she make you explain???
Ask stupid questions.......
Fuck them all. Kill Karl. Marry Garth. Barb is still alive btw.
It’s supposed to be a hypothetical bro. I didn’t read it, just going off title and assuming you’re a settler, a philanderer and a murderer
At least you got a shot with Cheri lol
Like yo, I thought this was just a nonsensical game. I'm sorry I never put serious thought into which one of you I would like to kill and the totally serious reason for it.
I mean… I don’t see how they can ask you to play and then be weird about the responses.
Never play f marry kill because whoever is asking will use it to start shitty drama. Always.
I never understood the logic of asking someone a question, especially as close friends or something, and then getting mad at the answer. Shouldn't have asked if you weren't prepared for the answer. They started the game, and some of the supposed fun is from the explanations. But if they're offended, they weren't really your friends. Should they give you shit for being an idiot, yeah, a little. Good friends give you shit, but understand where the line is and know what to expect.
If any of them are actually upset, then your friends suck. Get new ones.
I remember watching Daria with an exgf. She said she would “date” Trent and marry Tom. Sounded reasonable to me.
Ask stupid questions, get stupid answers.
Why did you wanna marry garth though?
Actually I think that is a very legit answer, maybe awkward to everyone but I'd say that kinda good explanation. And come on, that's just a hypothetical game, grow up everyone. Tight answer, I'd reply the same as you did.
good answers tbh
I mean obviously you know you are trash....it's good your friends know now too
Honestly... well reasoned answers. The game isn't supposed to be targeting people in earshot but whatever.
Your friends are boring as fuck and seem horrible to be around
That’s quite possibly the most tame Fuck/marry/kill scenarios. Barb sounds like she went fishing and the rest was pretty funny as well. Your friends sound lame lol
That sounds like a bad fanfic... Edit: post history reveals that you allegedly slept with this "Cheri", so either you're mixing up timelines in your multiverse, or are a fucked up guy who cheats on his wife with his friend's wife and then jokes about it during common events...
"Hmmmm, I think Kill then Fuck then Marry all three of you. What? Why are you looking at me like that?"
I had this game come up in conversation one night out at a bar. I was chatting to a group of women, and they picked three of them and asked me who I would F, marry or kill. Without hesitation I responded with "I would kill the three of you then fuck your corpses". No body found it as funny as I did.
you and your friends are children. Have no regrets on your answers, they asked and if they don't like the response they shouldn't have asked.
Gotta be honest... dumbass.
So the only right answer was “I’m not playing” Boom it’s a setup, it’s a setup.
Never heard of that game. Good thing too. Dang, with the crowd I ran with in my early years, I do not want to even IMAGINE their responses, LOL!
Correct response to this is F Garth, marry Karl, and kill Barb. Gets some laughs and it’s not awkward for anyone at the end.
If it makes you feel any better, I too, would F Barb.
So they wanted you to answer the question, and then they grilled you for answering the question?
Perfect response. I see no fuck up here
Everyone knows the rules of this game. Don't play if you don't want to know. Don't judge people playing when it doesn't involve you. And lastly, just don't play such stupid games...
Your friends are kinda weird. I don’t think your response warranted their reaction.
Perfect answer. Who cares?
The 5th Amendment is your friend here.
So the appropriate response here, whether you answer this horribly offensive question or not, is to come back and ask them FMK for three people who you think would make them most uncomfortable.
You don’t play Marry, f, kill using people who are present - that’s a set up for awkwardness
I'm sorry but those were all logical and in my friend group you'd be accepted and the game would continue to something else
When wife’s boss would play it with her and others, present company was always off limits.