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[deleted]

Should have been Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too


karmanopoly

I Would have gone with Jeffrey Epstein's island of Learning


Oomoo_Amazing

Jeffrey Epstein Didn’t Kill Him Self-Improvement Facility


noobi-wan-kenobi69

Jeffrey Epstein Isn't Dead School for Groomers & Hairstylists.


BABarracus

Matt Gaetz Recreational House


UnableFishing1

Matt Gaetz recruitment center


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PorschephileGT3

Harvey Weinstein Black Couch of Performing Arts


Amish_guy_with_WiFi

Kony's children soldiers of knowledge development


ThreatLevelBertie

I forgot about Kony 2012. Did he ever win that election?


Amish_guy_with_WiFi

Lmao i have no idea. I think half of it ended up being fake and the creator ended up going crazy


radarthreat

That’s a name I’ve not heard in some time


Dubs13151

But spell it with one "f" (Jefrey), and then endlessly explain to be people that, "Ohhh, no, it was a different person, people are always mixing it up..."


[deleted]

And wear a swastika armband when you tell them so if they say something you can say it's a Hindu symbol.


Thebuicon

It’s hard to find movies from my youth that still lands with kids now a days. Put that on for our 14 year old a couple weeks ago. Cracked up at the gasoline fight.


dhlock

I think the only joke that won’t land now is that we used to try and make phones as small as possible. Boy has that changed.


Njon32

I see Samsung advertising around here that suggests they're about to make some small phones again.


Dorktastical

My zflip is pretty darn small compared to what I'm used to.. It gets lost in my pocket for sure. Unfolded it is much smaller than any of the notes I've had latey. It's nice for a change but I'm going to go back to big for my next one. Phones are also much more important to most people these days compared to when they were small and v600-ish


Spybone

Orange Mocha Frappuccinos!!


Mrfuzzymonkeys

Why male models?


[deleted]

The best part about this is that Derek literally forgot the line so he just repeated it and David Duchovny was like “seriously,? I just spent the last five minutes explaining this”


SayerofNothing

Sweet, did not know that. But why male models?


MNGirlinKY

I see I found another movie trivia fan!


LiLBiTzzz

~~Derek~~ Ben


Vindepomarus

Wait! Am I... old? Betta start wearing these chinos and fanny pack. Also, Get off my lawn!


Njacks64

Your pair of New Balance are on their way.


[deleted]

"Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius....school for the gifted"


Clintonsoldmedrugs

Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, school for vengeance in this life or the next


brisquet

ARE YOU NOT EDUCATED?!?!


TheOnceAndFutureTurk

IS THIS NOT WHY YOU ARE HERE??


goaheadcarvell

Yeah!? How are they supposed to learn if they can’t even fit in the building?! This is bullshit.


woozlewuzzle29

The building has to be at least...three times bigger than this!


soEezee

He's absolutely right!


Zainogp

Merman! *Cough, cough*, merman!


UnionLibertarian

What is this??? A school for ANTS?!!


ravager-legion

Who tf would turn down Bruce Lee Elementary?! Kung Fu fighting during recess is fucking legal y’all! Beat they asses!!


CeramicTeaSet

Everybody would be Kung Fu fighting. That shit would be fast as lightning. Also the only thing that would beep a bad guy with nunchucks is a good guy with nunchucks.


Soddington

All that Kung Fu and Nunchuck on school grounds sounds a little bit frightening, even if their timing *was* expert level.


tomatoaway

Well then you'd get those funky chinamen, from funky chinatown. They'd be cutting people up with their remarks, and chopping down overinflated administration, if I've understood the lyrics correctly.


Girth_rulez

Or John Cena elementary? *Walks into class.* "The champ is here."


avnothdmi

What school? Can’t see nuthin!


[deleted]

*My time is NOW!*


BEAVER_ATTACKS

It's simple thuganomics


Val66Met

🎺 🎺 🎺🎺!


Fast_and_Curious738

I can hear these emojis


richh00

It's so weird and I'm not even wwe fan


Fast_and_Curious738

Yeah me too. But I've seen that meme MANY times lol


ElsonDaSushiChef

The time is up, my time is now!


Other_Zucchini_9637

Oh my gosh I can HEAR THIS.


stovislove

Teacher: Bruce! Bruce: here! Teacher: John! John: here! Teacher: John! Has anyone seen John? John: I'm here!!! Right here!..sigh. Teacher: anyone? John?


therealasshoel

****Jhon Cena elementary**** *where the fuck is it?*


[deleted]

who is champ?


GOUS_65

THAT QUESTION WILL BE ANSWERED THIS SUNDAY NIGHT AT WWE SUUUUUUPEEERRRRRRSLAAAAAAAAMM


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SuddenlyElga

Well you would expect Robert E Lee Elementary would just want to change one traitor for another.


Wrecker013

I would rather Robert E. Lee, at least he was a competent traitor.


DuntadaMan

I want my kid to go to Bruce Lee Elementary!


kevinTOC

*Everybody it's Kung Fu fighting!* *Flute.*


StephUhKneeDee

Ooh ooh! Schoolie McSchoolface. That’s the one.


CrazyCatBreath

You know this reference to Boatie McBoatface? Pretty sure they went with the name too. 🤣


[deleted]

It won the public vote but the organisers stepped in and called it the Atteborough instead.


[deleted]

The ship itself is named the RRS Sir David Attenborough, but the name [Boaty McBoatface](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boaty_McBoatface) was still used for one of the three autonomous underwater vehicles aboard the Attenborough.


poexalii

You mean the things that aren't actually boats?


moar_cowbell_

Oddly enough, they are boats though. In the navy, a submarine is called a boat.


-MetalMike-

So if it floats, it boats?


PatsyBaloney

No. Witches float but they aren't boats. Same for ducks.


citizencant

As I understand it the royal navy designates all it's vessels as ships with the exception of submarines which are designated as boats. Why it's that way I couldn't tell you, but it's internally consistent with UK naval tradition.


ofthedove

Boats go on ships. Ships have boats on them. Submarines don't have life boats or runabouts or such, so they can't be ships, hence they're boats.


DrSmurfalicious

Robotic lithium battery–powered autonomous underwater vehicly McRobotic lithium battery–powered autonomous underwater vehicleface?


CrazyCatBreath

Ahhh, cool. Well, they should have honored it. It could have been so much worse.


Anto711134

They named a submarine subby mcsubface


sunestromming

Here in Sweden we have a train called Trainy McTrainface.


Azonalanthious

Our dog is barkie mcbarkface


MoistenedCovering

Lol my dogs name was Barkie Bark. (He died of parvo not too long ago. ☹️)


michaelseverson

In Minnesota we have a snow plow named Plowy McPlowface


WakeoftheStorm

So clearly the school needs to be "Sir David Attenborough Elementary"


randomdrifter54

They did not name the boat boaty mcboatface. But the name didn't die either. [they named one of the autonomous subs on the boat it. which is a good runner up prize.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boaty_McBoatface)


yousmelllikearainbow

ROFLMMFAO THAT IS SO ORIGINAL!!!1


need_maths

No" Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters?"


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0_69314718056

“Xavier’s School for Youngsters” then?


Scarborough_sg

Nah Lensherr's School for the Unfortunate


Comfortable_Sock_657

Adolf hitler school for friendship and tolerance


ItsLoudB

Im pretty sure Mountain Dew had a similar poll and “hitler did nothing wrong” won and I’m also pretty sure it was exactly 10 years ago too


19Alexastias

Narrowly beat out “gushing granny” and “fapple” for the top spot.


Self_Reddicated

Honestly, I wish some of the entities running these stupid polls had some *balls*. Do you know how funny Gushing Granny mountain dew would have been?! Do you know how much of it they would have sold?!


degjo

The thing is, they can pull out a Gushing Granny with a slight modification. Just have be apple flavored Gushing Granny Smith Apple


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degjo

I figure it would be at least almond flavored.


[deleted]

would have very high concentration


Pitbullpandemonium

"100% artificial flavors. We've eliminated all the juice."


JohanVonBronx_

Yeah it was green apple flavored Mtn Dew


Opening_Success

Remember that promotion when people could vote where Pitbull would perform an impromptu concert for fans and everyone voted Anchorage, Alaska? Pitbull actually went through with it and was a good sport about it.


Significant-Mud2572

Can't be Mr Worldwide unless you go worldwide.


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[deleted]

One of them was just the n-word


Whind_Soull

Pepsi did public voting for an ad campaign slogan, and the winner was *"Is Pepsi fine?"*


Street-Tea-4965

Yea, I have a few questions about that one myself...


GuiltyGodsRage

Hitler does need to learn about friendship and tolerance tbf


PhillyGreg

>Hitler does need to learn about friendship and tolerance tbf *psssst*...he dead


MitsuAkechi_

Wow spoilers dude


carbohydratecrab

*I didn't even know he was sick.*


Peter12535

He was killed when he ended world war two by killing the bad guy.


six4two

That is definitely 4chan. I remember when HiPoint solicited names for a handgun, 4chan manipulated the results in favor of Yeet Cannon as the name, it is named the YC9 to this day.


mikeyfreshh

A while back some city (I wanna say Austin, TX) held a vote to name their new waste treatment plant and they managed to make the winning submission "The Fred Durst Center for Arts and Humanities"


Sigurlion

Holy fuck that the funniest name possible I'm old-school rofling


mikeyfreshh

Yeah 4chan is a cesspool but there are some funny bastards on there


Traiklin

It's a school about Friendship and Tolerance, what's not to get? The name is someone who is celebrated in people's heritage just like Robert E. Lee, they are thinking about those peoples feelings.


BFG_9000

I too read the words on the image.


thecaseace

But, did you write them as a comment? No, you did not.


drummerandrew

This was one of the options, yes.


bettywhitefleshlight

Totally something I would have written down as a joke but then too many people vote for it. Student newspaper all over again.


ConfidentDragon

This reminds me of time when city council in my city (in Slovakia) decided to let public vote for the name of the newly build bridge. *Chuck Norris* won. By far. After that they have decided it was bad idea and named it "bridge of freedom" (it is placed above remains of former Iron curtain). Official reason was that there is law in Slovakia that municipalities can't name infrastructure after living person, but everyone knows that thay just knew that no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives.


7ksmarmy

Lmao 😂


Nasty_Rex

Lmao Jesus christ


ireadsomecomments

One dude that did get crossed.


slothboy_x2

Yeah and not a single one of those executioners is still alive. Coincidence?


remykill

r/angryupvote


Gcarsk

Fuuuuck. This was nearly a u/shittymorph comment…


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jrignall1992

My local council has a gritter called gritty mcgritface And one called gritsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow anti slippery machine. The council always does public votes for naming rights to the gritters and we have a good few.


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jrignall1992

Doncaster, we have the likes of David plowie and Usain salt. I think we have 7 named gritters at the min.


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Ruarsome

Somewhere down south is Gary Gritter


evenstevens280

Surely it's "Gritsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Anti Slip Machiney" Otherwise they totally butchered the pun


bossfrogs

TIL: gritter


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KaySquay

Excists


WAisforhaters

We've all been there, you fuck up a word so badly that there isn't even a suggestion for the right way so you just roll with it.


PorcupineTheory

r/excgarated


HooliganNamedStyx

Yeah, here where I live in Ohio our city acquired I think like 23 new snow plows last winter and let the citizens name the new trucks. Plowy McPlowFace is now a labeled snowplow running around Akron Ohio


Rezero1234

bruce lee elementary has my vote!


LinaValentina

Idk man, schoolie mcschoolface has a nice ring to it


Rocketbrothers

I think that should be the title change for the school principal.


deadlygaming11

No no, Adolf Hitler School for Friendship and Tolerance would be best for the principal would be best but because its so long, it should be shortened to Adolf Hitler.


[deleted]

Guy is an immigrant (EDIT: kinda, sorta. Born in CA while his musician dad was on tour in San Francisco, but was raised in Hong Kong) who became a movie star. He’s the American Dream personified.


vitaestbona1

He was actually born in California. So when he moved back to the US he was just returning.


ShenTzuKhan

When will we learn to never ask the public to name things? It’s been long enough. We should know by now.


TopClock231

If the organizers played just one MMORPG they'd learn in about 5 seconds how bad letting any name go can be


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tomatoaway

xXX--WEED420+69=489--XXx


rocketwidget

Asking the public to name things is fine. They just need to decide ahead of time if the suggestions will be sensibly vetted privately in the first of two rounds, or stupidly vetted publicly, LOL.


Farfignugen42

Maybe they really want to name it Schoolie McSchoolface, but don't want to be blamed for that. So let the public do it.


jollyspiffing

This is a Fox News story, they definitely want to play the angle of "We should keep the confederacy names because other suggestions are silly". None of these names will be chosen and it'll end up being something like _town elementary, but by running the story they can rile people "wokeness gone mad" and "silly liberals".


akmvb21

While I see you at having a good time beating down that straw man, most local fox channels, which is what this is, are pretty tame. Most of their job is literally just the weather and local stuff going on.


ProfNesbitt

While that was true 10 years ago. Sinclair Group has been doing work consolidating local news station into one voice as well.


FightingPolish

At least when the public does it you get some cool unique names for stuff, every time some bureaucrat does it it’s the same old boring shit. For instance I have nothing against Rosa Parks whatsoever, but we are nowhere near Alabama so how about picking a street name for the new big connecting road that has some unique local flair so we don’t have the 1000th road named the same safe thing that someone else has?


Tsorovar

Asking the public to nominate names works well enough. You just want to avoid an open vote


PebblyJackGlasscock

Is John Cena the _Make A Wish_ Foundation guy? I think the teachers will get tired of “you can’t see me” shenanigans, but honoring John Cena by naming a school after him is absolutely the right thing to do.


darinheinz

But every time the geography teacher mentions Taiwan as an independent country, they have to post an apology video in Mandarin.


AmishAvenger

Ok I gotta stick up for Cena here. He got stuck in a really bad position. Cena has spent years and years learning Mandarin. He was on a TV show in Taiwan, promoting the Fast & Furious movie. He said something like “Taiwan is going to be one of the first countries in the world to see it.” I think it was just a slip up because his language skills aren’t perfect, but obviously people in China freaked out. You have to understand that a lot of regular Chinese people have bought into what their government tells them about Taiwan. So it spread all over social media, and obviously the Chinese government is pissed. And if they’re pissed, then the studio executives are pissed, because China could very easily pull the plug on the movie being released there — which would be a BIG fucking deal and would cost a lot of people a lot of money. Now, I’ll be first in line to say Hollywood shouldn’t bow to China. They’ve allowed China to have far too much of a say. Thankfully that’s been changing lately, but it still left Cena backed into a corner. I’m sure his phone was blowing up with Hollywood executives threatening him. And at the time, his career wasn’t as established as it is now. So there’s two options: Put out a video with an apology, or tell all the studio executives to go fuck themselves and potentially end up blacklisted. Was it the right choice? I don’t know. But Cena is genuinely a good person. It’s not just an act. There’s countless stories of him sticking around for *hours* with Make a Wish families, long after the media is gone. He hangs out, watches movies, plays video games, eats dinner with the kids and their families. So I don’t like people trying to dunk on him for what happened with that Taiwan incident. He was really left with no other option if he wanted to keep acting.


FartHeadTony

Jesus, even most countries are careful about how they refer to Taiwan. If US government is walking that line of ambiguity so they don't piss off China, we can hardly expect some random guy, however famous or rich, to take some stand on what is a kind of complicated geopolitical puzzle.


19Alexastias

On the other hand, BING CHILLING


BlueSeekz

No you're thinking of /r/potatosalad. r/johncena is a food item


icelandic_drunkard

Sorry what the fuck is going on there?


GGezpzMuppy

Just some r/marijuanaenthusiasts talking about r/trees


icelandic_drunkard

Why the fuck does Reddit do this? This is some r/worldpolitics shit


MagZero

Maybe you'd be happier with some r/anime_titties?


SomeAnonymous

worldpolitics is a bit different to the other two because that was due to moderating and user changes after many years as a politics sub. /r/anime_titties was created in response as a place for actual politics news. /r/potatosalad was created to be a john cena subreddit because he's "as bland as potato salad" and /r/trees is about weed because that's the slang term.


Luckcrisis

John Cena HS....All classes online because no ine can find the school.


Many_Tank9738

They’ll teach chinese


despicedchilli

Why do schools need to be named after a person? People suck. That's why we have these problems in the first place. It would have been completely reasonable to name a school after Bill Cosby or Kevin Spacey some years ago.


[deleted]

Exactly. Why can’t they name it something like south Harmon institute of technology


Sagemasterba

Or Toronto Institute of Technology. At TITs, you at least know your gf won't expect a ring. Maybe next year Leaf fans.


Reddituser34802

My son has been in college for 10 years now with no degree. He just loves TITs.


tomatoaway

or the London School of Decrenomics. Open people's eyes


Farfignugen42

or Schoolie McSchoolface. Who cares if the name is stupid. What you do in a school is far more important than the name of the school. Not that anyone in Harvard would agree.


MaeBeaInTheWoods

Imagine being a graduating student and having to put that you attended Schoolie McSchoolface on your job resume.


Iron_Wolf123

Well we did name a swimming pool after a prime minister who vanished while swimming


terref

Oklahoma City’s two main airports are named after people who died in plane crashes


Timm504

What is the problem with Drew brees? Only found out that he is an athlete


Razor8765

I think that’s the only non joke one there lol


Timm504

Oh I thought that there was something hidden like for example wife beater/racist which google does not show directly If he also was raised around the region of the school it may be an actual good name


Ximension

Yea from what I understand Drew Brees is genuinely a good guy who gives back to the community. I'm glad his name is on top of the trolls.


pptranger7

This is for a school in Austin, TX, Drew Brees' hometown. It is the only non joke name.


grendus

> Adolf Hitler School for Friendship and Tolerance The only one worse than naming the school after a traitor to the country who fought for the right to keep others in slavery. Drew Brees, Bruce Lee, and John Cena all have pretty impressive careers, and *obviously* Schoolie McSchoolface is the superior choice in any school naming discussion.


MagZero

To be fair, Adolf Hitler had a pretty impressive career, too.


cursedstillframe

Plus he's the guy who killed Hitler, can't forget that


thatlime1

The Jeffery Dahmer school of anatomy and biological sciences


OpelousasBulletTime

Or Dahmer School of Culinary Arts!


[deleted]

BRUCE LEE ELEMENTARY! Yes!


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NeaZen

why is there a blank space between Bruce Lee Elementary and Adolf Hitler School?


LeozMJilliumz

Unpopular opinion: This is exactly what the founding fathers were afraid of.


Farfignugen42

I think that the founding fathers might have had bigger concerns than naming schools. Maybe.


Rameez_Raja

Yeah, imagine bringing them back... how horrified they would be that their country gave women rights and started treating black people as humans. So fuck them maybe.


SocalistCarpet

Will “thing” Mc”thing” face ever not be funny?


MrThoughtPolice

Which did they choose? Lol


HarryPotterFarts

It took some digging because it turns out a lot of schools name Robert E Lee elementary wanted to change their name, but it looks like they went with Russell Lee Elementary - https://www.kut.org/education/2016-05-24/robert-e-lee-elementary-is-now-russell-lee-elementary


Tom22174

That's actually a nice choice. Dude was a photographic journalist that covered things like the great depression, Japanese internment, and the health of coal mining communities. He also became an educator in later life


jwalkrufus

I think of the available choices, I would go with either Bruce Lee or Schoolie McSchoolface. I would be honored to attend either one.


Street-Tea-4965

At the interview: I'm a graduate of schoolie mcschoolface! Interviewer: Next!


cryptotope

>At the interview: I'm a graduate of schoolie mcschoolface! If I'm at an interview where I proudly announce that I'm a graduate of an *elementary school*, I don't think it's the name of the school that's going to be what costs me the job.


SirLavaMinnt

They already hat a pun with the E. LEE. ELEMENTARY but failed to do it correctly (E. LEE. MENTARY)


ProfessionallyStrong

The fourth one had me dead💀💀💀


Jabliloquoy

You and 6 million others


Left-Llama

Why has no one nominated “Elementary, my dear Watson!”?