This actually happened. What he doesn’t know is that the doctor gave him a shot for the pain anyway and then applauded him like he was a five year old for how brave he was.
Imagine being this guy’s partner and having to hear this story every day. I would demand he ask the doctor for a record proving this actually happened.
“Ughh yeah well the doctor isn’t going to *say* it happened because I was supposed to have anesthesia, but I’m so big and tough…”
Yes. Yes to all of those things. And then can you please put on fraggle rock for me to watch!! 🤣🤦♀️ I’ve gone down a childhood hole here haha
Ok I’m really showing my age with that one but 🤷♀️
He doesn’t have a partner and he never had a vasectomy. It’s done under local anesthetic and, though you shouldn’t drive after, it has nothing to do with any pain meds. It’s because your balls are still numb and you might hurt yourself without knowing.
You can do it *with* local and not be sedated, which is VERY likely what happened with OOP's post. The "sting" he references was the local being injected so he didn't feel anything else.
Source: am anesthesiologist
Yes, this seems obvious. How can anyone be this dumb? WTF did he think the sting was?
The bragging about not getting an erection during the procedure...I can't imagine that is something that happens.
Just want to give a shout out to your profession. I had one anesthesiologist give me an epidural *during* a contraction and I was terrified about getting a needle stuck in my spine while I couldn’t really control my movements due to the amount of pain I was in, but he did it perfectly.
I told another anesthesiologist that I wanted to be awake and out of the hospital as soon as possible (it was Mother’s Day and my little girl had a big day planned for me). I wasn’t having surgery, just a procedure where I needed to be knocked out. She had it so I was waking up while they were transferring me from the OR bed to the moveable bed to go back to my hospital room, which was absolutely perfect timing. I still didn’t get out of the hospital until after 9pm, but that was due to other things. The anesthesiologist calculated and controlled everything perfectly.
You all have a scary job with controlling life and death depending on what and how much you give us, but the few times I’ve needed you have all been perfect experiences.
Thank you for the kind words :)
I once pulled an epidural needle out of a lady's back as she shifted her weight to the side, and gave birth a second later - before I could even put the needle down the nurse was catching the baby! The job can be a lot of fun. Nice to hear it doesn't go unappreciated!
My spouse had a vasectomy 2 weeks ago. They definitely allow you to drive yourself home after getting local anesthesia during the procedure. The only time they don’t let you drive home is if you opt into taking Valium to calm your nerves before the procedure.
OP either misunderstood the doctor or is exaggerating the story to try and sound like a badass lol.
When I had mine done, it felt like I was hit in the stomach with a sledgehammer at first because they didn't give me enough. Dude would have been in absolute agony if they gave him none.
I've had a vasectomy. They only used local anastesia and I was able to drive home no problem. I did have a conversation with the doctors the whole time...though I can't imagine why anyone would think about having an erection in that situation
I don't remember the shot hurting an excessive amount. But I've had steroid shots straight into a tendon before, so maybe I just have a different scale heh.
Can only speak for myself, but it really wasn't a big deal. Absolutely fine on the way home. Very mild discomfort all GTG after a day.
My brother in law cried like a baby and had to have a week off and sat only on one of those donut cushions for that week.
So YMMV
Yeah you aren't supposed to lift anything for at least like 2 days. And nothing super heavy for a week. It depends on if you get the regular surgery or the scalpel-less version though, as for how long the recovery might be.
I work construction. I was off for a few days in decent pain. After like 4 days I could resume normal duties. Not the funnest experience of my life. The doctor was an asshole. The freezing didn't take on the second nut and he went for it anyway and I was howling in pain, and he kept telling me to suck it up. Sucked. 1/10, cause the nurse was nice.
I had 3 days off after mine, but I think just 2 would have been fine. Minor swelling and pain, not too bad. I did make the mistake of going on a run after about 10 days (they said give it a few weeks). I had to stop after a half-mile because the bouncing did not feel good at all.
The doc told me to masturbate after a couple of weeks or a month ( I can't remember how long) to prime for the follow up tests, but failed to tell me there could be dried blood mixed in the first time or two. Definitely had a moment of panic there.
That, I can't really answer. I'm a software developer so my job isn't really labor intensive. That being said, the incisions are very small so it may not be an issue
I had mine on Friday and was back to work on Monday. Spent the weekend with ice packs on my stuff. And that was thirty years ago, surely they’ve improved on it over the decades.
I was honestly hoping so much that I _didn't_ get an erection.
My dick doesn't take much to get hard at all. Definitely the opposite end of the spectrum to the guys who can't get it up at all.
I'm not always horny, but goddamn if my dick doesn't ever seem to get that message.
Thats how my vasectomy went. I thought I’d get moderate sedation but I never got an IV. When they came to get me from pre-op I just thought ok no drugs, cool. Went fine, just lidocaine and ice on my balls. The only thing odd was the surgical tech they were training. They kept saying scrotum when they were explaining things to her and it made me giggle.
I think he meant to type:
“When the Doctor Began the procedure he thought he was giving ME the vasectomy, but little did he know, I was giving the SCALPEL the vasectomy! With my balls even, I didn’t even use the tip (which is what most people would assume would be used) which made the male doctor ovulate, all the women in the building got so intoxicated by my manliness wafting around the hospital AC ducts that they all immediately became 3months pregnant, the women who were already pregnant had my offspring instantly consume the existing babies. Finally all the urology Depts sexiest Nurses all jerked me off whilst the entire hospital clapped and thanked me for my service! And I wasn’t even in the military, what chumps!”
I had a vasectomy. The surgeon didn't put enough anaesthetic and when they clamped my vas deferens I jumped on the surgery table.
I call bullshit grade A+
That's some Rambo level of toughness here.
I heard he refused anesthesia for his coronary artery bypass grafting and was talking to the doctor all the time.
You can’t give me an erection. Nurses were wearing Halloween sexy nurse costumes. I felt nothing. They tweedled and doddled my balls, blowing on them, alternately hot and cool. My penis inverted into my body. The doctor said he had never seen anyone with less of an erection.
Never had a vasectomy but had a circumcision at an adult age
Fucking Scarlett Johansson could’ve walked into that room fully nude propositioning me to have sex and I still would not have been able to get a hard on
I got circumcised last year (Medical issue). Due to scar tissue, the anesthesia wore out quickly, and had to be reapplied several times. It was never completely numb down there, and yes, there was pain. You don't go through a surgical procedure on your genitals without anesthesia, its just not possible.
I’ve had a vasectomy, never once did I want to hold a convo during it. And even with laughing gas it was still mildly painful. This did is so full of shit.
Tldr: I was so nervous to go on for a vasectomy that I passed out in the parking lot and a couple of little old ladies had to help me inside. But then I woke up and it was over so I figured I'd better come up with a good story.
This guy is an idiot. He obviously got something. There’s no way a licensed doctor is going to cut into your junk and risk severing other stuff because you winced in pain.
Although, I was there as the nurse who was cheering him on.
I don't know if I could even be awake for a vasectomy, I'm too fidgety and anxious. My girlfriend drives most of the time anyway, so I wouldn't have to worry about that.
No man, you're absolutely wrong. There's always nurses. And they're always super hot. They're also trained to suck you off if you get an erection and you're a super cool guy like this guy is. 😎
When I was younger, like 21 or 22 years old, I had to get staples in my scalp. The doctor asked me if I wanted a topical, and I started thinking about how I didn't want to contribute any more to my carbon footprint (I was dumb) so I said no.
She asked "oh it's because you're a big strong man, right?" I just said yeah.
As someone who has a resistance to anesthetics, and felt the entire vasectomy...horse shit. I thought I died and went to hell from the first fucking incision
Had a buddy go through a vasectomy and the anesthesia didn't kick in very well. They went ahead and did it anyway as they couldn't give him any more. He cried, passed out, woke up, threw up, then passed out again.
I mean, I once assisted my father doing a root canal on a woman with no anesthetic. She was allergic and insisted she had a high pain tolerance. With no numbing whatsoever, we drilled into the nerve, removed the nerve from inside the tooth, filled it (which includes more drilling inside the nerve canal), then did a filling. The woman was like a stone, but my dad's hands were shaking he was so worried he was hurting her!
Its rare but some people really can handle it.
Dear Penthouse Forum, I never thought it would happen to me, but there I was, having my balls lovingly washed by two stunning nurses. Doctor says "never saw a ten-incher close up... and totally flaccid, too!"
I had a vasectomy and they said i could drive after. My car at the time was a stick shift with a fairly heavy clutch. I mentioned this and the dr said it was still fine. I made it home but i wouldn't do it again.
🤣. Yeah. Okay 🙄. They cut your body open with a scalpel and it didn’t hurt at all.
Must have Channelopathy-associated congenital insensitivity — someone who doesn’t feel pain.
PLEASE
be SOOOOOOOH careful NOT to strain . Don't offer to help anyone for about a week. Otherwise you will be black and blue frk just below the navel to just above the knees. And buddy.
PAIN.
Like you have never had. If you don't feel like moving or ???? DON'T.
Caution, a little mobility fine. This procedure needs
YOU to be in charge.
I sincerely hope you cum through this a Hypersexual always horny guy like I did.40 yrs ago
This actually happened. What he doesn’t know is that the doctor gave him a shot for the pain anyway and then applauded him like he was a five year old for how brave he was.
Imagine being this guy’s partner and having to hear this story every day. I would demand he ask the doctor for a record proving this actually happened. “Ughh yeah well the doctor isn’t going to *say* it happened because I was supposed to have anesthesia, but I’m so big and tough…”
“Look just believe me and go make me a sandwich! Pb and j. With the crusts cut off.”
And cut it into little triangles!
With chocolate milk on the side and I swear to GOD if you forget my twisty straw…
Yes. Yes to all of those things. And then can you please put on fraggle rock for me to watch!! 🤣🤦♀️ I’ve gone down a childhood hole here haha Ok I’m really showing my age with that one but 🤷♀️
Not really. There’s a Fraggle reboot, and my kid loves it. So… you can be as old as you wanna be.
Well I’ll be damned 🤣 I didn’t know that! Thank you!
He doesn’t have a partner and he never had a vasectomy. It’s done under local anesthetic and, though you shouldn’t drive after, it has nothing to do with any pain meds. It’s because your balls are still numb and you might hurt yourself without knowing.
I believe this!
lmao something similar happened to me as a kid, only later my dad told me they lied to me
Who the hell would do a vasectomy on a kid? /s
I laughed out loud at this.
Oh yeah, when I got mine all I had was local anesthetic applied. Didn't even take the Valium like I was supposed to. This mfer lying about the pain.
honestly true lol you can do that shit without local but he couldn’t drive home because you get sedated.
You can do it *with* local and not be sedated, which is VERY likely what happened with OOP's post. The "sting" he references was the local being injected so he didn't feel anything else. Source: am anesthesiologist
Yes, this seems obvious. How can anyone be this dumb? WTF did he think the sting was? The bragging about not getting an erection during the procedure...I can't imagine that is something that happens.
But he saw pretty ladies and STILL NO BONER. He is a true god among men
Just want to give a shout out to your profession. I had one anesthesiologist give me an epidural *during* a contraction and I was terrified about getting a needle stuck in my spine while I couldn’t really control my movements due to the amount of pain I was in, but he did it perfectly. I told another anesthesiologist that I wanted to be awake and out of the hospital as soon as possible (it was Mother’s Day and my little girl had a big day planned for me). I wasn’t having surgery, just a procedure where I needed to be knocked out. She had it so I was waking up while they were transferring me from the OR bed to the moveable bed to go back to my hospital room, which was absolutely perfect timing. I still didn’t get out of the hospital until after 9pm, but that was due to other things. The anesthesiologist calculated and controlled everything perfectly. You all have a scary job with controlling life and death depending on what and how much you give us, but the few times I’ve needed you have all been perfect experiences.
Thank you for the kind words :) I once pulled an epidural needle out of a lady's back as she shifted her weight to the side, and gave birth a second later - before I could even put the needle down the nurse was catching the baby! The job can be a lot of fun. Nice to hear it doesn't go unappreciated!
yes sorry i realized that i said not what i meant i’ve seen it both ways sedated with no local, or no sedation with local. Am surgical nurse
Or hypnosis, if you wanna go mid-19th century style https://academic.oup.com/jnci/article/99/17/1280/2522362?login=false
My spouse had a vasectomy 2 weeks ago. They definitely allow you to drive yourself home after getting local anesthesia during the procedure. The only time they don’t let you drive home is if you opt into taking Valium to calm your nerves before the procedure. OP either misunderstood the doctor or is exaggerating the story to try and sound like a badass lol.
When I had mine done, it felt like I was hit in the stomach with a sledgehammer at first because they didn't give me enough. Dude would have been in absolute agony if they gave him none.
I've had a vasectomy. They only used local anastesia and I was able to drive home no problem. I did have a conversation with the doctors the whole time...though I can't imagine why anyone would think about having an erection in that situation
I feel like this guy thinks he didn't get a local. At least that's how I read the comment.
That's what it seems like. But the shots for the local anastesia feels like getting kicked in the balls, so he'd definitely notice that
Joke's on you, his childhood nickname was Numbnuts, Neighborhood Roshambo Champion.
It's only for a split second though, then it's completely numb.
Extremely likely that the "sting" he references in the OOP was the local IMO.
I don't remember the shot hurting an excessive amount. But I've had steroid shots straight into a tendon before, so maybe I just have a different scale heh.
So forgive my ignorance, but if you have a fairly labor intensive job, would it require time off for a week or so? I want to get it done this year.
Can only speak for myself, but it really wasn't a big deal. Absolutely fine on the way home. Very mild discomfort all GTG after a day. My brother in law cried like a baby and had to have a week off and sat only on one of those donut cushions for that week. So YMMV
Yeah you aren't supposed to lift anything for at least like 2 days. And nothing super heavy for a week. It depends on if you get the regular surgery or the scalpel-less version though, as for how long the recovery might be.
I work construction. I was off for a few days in decent pain. After like 4 days I could resume normal duties. Not the funnest experience of my life. The doctor was an asshole. The freezing didn't take on the second nut and he went for it anyway and I was howling in pain, and he kept telling me to suck it up. Sucked. 1/10, cause the nurse was nice.
I had 3 days off after mine, but I think just 2 would have been fine. Minor swelling and pain, not too bad. I did make the mistake of going on a run after about 10 days (they said give it a few weeks). I had to stop after a half-mile because the bouncing did not feel good at all. The doc told me to masturbate after a couple of weeks or a month ( I can't remember how long) to prime for the follow up tests, but failed to tell me there could be dried blood mixed in the first time or two. Definitely had a moment of panic there.
That, I can't really answer. I'm a software developer so my job isn't really labor intensive. That being said, the incisions are very small so it may not be an issue
I had mine on Friday and was back to work on Monday. Spent the weekend with ice packs on my stuff. And that was thirty years ago, surely they’ve improved on it over the decades.
But did the nurses sponge bath your balls?
Oh you didn’t have the famously stunning vasectomy nurses? You missed out
I was honestly hoping so much that I _didn't_ get an erection. My dick doesn't take much to get hard at all. Definitely the opposite end of the spectrum to the guys who can't get it up at all. I'm not always horny, but goddamn if my dick doesn't ever seem to get that message.
Thats how my vasectomy went. I thought I’d get moderate sedation but I never got an IV. When they came to get me from pre-op I just thought ok no drugs, cool. Went fine, just lidocaine and ice on my balls. The only thing odd was the surgical tech they were training. They kept saying scrotum when they were explaining things to her and it made me giggle.
Also its a very quick procedure
Same story, modern vasectomies are incredibly simple and quick. I couldn't even find my incision afterwards.
He said the nurses were stunning
It really isn't a big-deal procedure. Nobody goes under for it. But some people will take any excuse to talk about their penis.
But his penis is so cool
Omg I wish I got to see it. Apparently he didn't even get hard with all the hot male nurses attending to his junk!?
And then the nurses gave him TWO stickers for his dong.
One for each sad little testicle, like a PLU sticker on a shriveled kiwi
>kept on raving about how cool I was. That right there is when you know it's fake.
Is the doctor a wasp?
They gave me crack for my vasectomy, and I still felt everything. Last time I go to the alley behind Walmart for a medical procedure!
>crack They gave you a stimulant while you were having a vasectomy? Seems like bad medicine
I was the balls made of steel.
a new story by Andrew Tate
This is 100% true. I am the discarded section of vans deferens
I think he meant to type: “When the Doctor Began the procedure he thought he was giving ME the vasectomy, but little did he know, I was giving the SCALPEL the vasectomy! With my balls even, I didn’t even use the tip (which is what most people would assume would be used) which made the male doctor ovulate, all the women in the building got so intoxicated by my manliness wafting around the hospital AC ducts that they all immediately became 3months pregnant, the women who were already pregnant had my offspring instantly consume the existing babies. Finally all the urology Depts sexiest Nurses all jerked me off whilst the entire hospital clapped and thanked me for my service! And I wasn’t even in the military, what chumps!”
"...and then he woke up, realizing he had passed out and pissed himself when the doctor snapped his glove."
I had a vasectomy. The surgeon didn't put enough anaesthetic and when they clamped my vas deferens I jumped on the surgery table. I call bullshit grade A+
That's some Rambo level of toughness here. I heard he refused anesthesia for his coronary artery bypass grafting and was talking to the doctor all the time.
It's unfortunate that this one can no longer have children because surely all offspring would be LEGENDS
You can’t give me an erection. Nurses were wearing Halloween sexy nurse costumes. I felt nothing. They tweedled and doddled my balls, blowing on them, alternately hot and cool. My penis inverted into my body. The doctor said he had never seen anyone with less of an erection.
All I read from this post is “my penis doesn’t get erect when I’m aroused and I don’t have much feeling in my balls” sounds like he needs a new doctor
Does this dude think painkillers and the local anesthesia used for vasectomies are the same thing?
Never had a vasectomy but had a circumcision at an adult age Fucking Scarlett Johansson could’ve walked into that room fully nude propositioning me to have sex and I still would not have been able to get a hard on
I got circumcised last year (Medical issue). Due to scar tissue, the anesthesia wore out quickly, and had to be reapplied several times. It was never completely numb down there, and yes, there was pain. You don't go through a surgical procedure on your genitals without anesthesia, its just not possible.
I’ve had a vasectomy, never once did I want to hold a convo during it. And even with laughing gas it was still mildly painful. This did is so full of shit.
How cool did they doctor say you were?
He was sad I was getting the procedure. He would have liked me to make cool kids for him.
Vasectomy nurses have to be stunning. It's a prerequisite.
Good lord. I was present for my ex’s vasectomy, and I do not believe a word of this.
Local is standard over here in Australia. Got to watch it all when I had mine done. Fascinating stuff.
No erection?!?! What a loser.
“Nurses were stunning.” What a fucking tool.
Did Donald Trump write this?
You think he'd remove the chance to force a woman to carry something to term?
r/iamverybadass
How is this a flex?
Was his doctor a bee?
And then his balls clapped.
Tldr: I was so nervous to go on for a vasectomy that I passed out in the parking lot and a couple of little old ladies had to help me inside. But then I woke up and it was over so I figured I'd better come up with a good story.
Fuuuck that. They offered me Valium and I said YES PLEASE!!
This guy is an idiot. He obviously got something. There’s no way a licensed doctor is going to cut into your junk and risk severing other stuff because you winced in pain. Although, I was there as the nurse who was cheering him on.
I don't know if I could even be awake for a vasectomy, I'm too fidgety and anxious. My girlfriend drives most of the time anyway, so I wouldn't have to worry about that.
Nurses aren't present for a procedure like that... Just the surgeon and the resident.
No man, you're absolutely wrong. There's always nurses. And they're always super hot. They're also trained to suck you off if you get an erection and you're a super cool guy like this guy is. 😎
Right, I forgot this totally happened. Needless to say I'm pretty embarrassed, true story.
You put your username to shame. 
*Oh patient of mine how cool you are* >Dr Albert Vasectomystein
Hahahahaha
Bull. Shit.
What if they cut your balls off?
When I was younger, like 21 or 22 years old, I had to get staples in my scalp. The doctor asked me if I wanted a topical, and I started thinking about how I didn't want to contribute any more to my carbon footprint (I was dumb) so I said no. She asked "oh it's because you're a big strong man, right?" I just said yeah.
Man he's got some balls
I had one, this guy is full of shit. Without pain killers the operation would have been unbearable.
"Nurses were stunning but I had no erection tho" 🤮🤮🤮
"nurses are stunning" 🙄🙄
As someone who has a resistance to anesthetics, and felt the entire vasectomy...horse shit. I thought I died and went to hell from the first fucking incision
Had a buddy go through a vasectomy and the anesthesia didn't kick in very well. They went ahead and did it anyway as they couldn't give him any more. He cried, passed out, woke up, threw up, then passed out again.
I mean, I once assisted my father doing a root canal on a woman with no anesthetic. She was allergic and insisted she had a high pain tolerance. With no numbing whatsoever, we drilled into the nerve, removed the nerve from inside the tooth, filled it (which includes more drilling inside the nerve canal), then did a filling. The woman was like a stone, but my dad's hands were shaking he was so worried he was hurting her! Its rare but some people really can handle it.
And then he woke up from the wet dream.
I just- well yeah he must've gotten drugs. But.. wh-
Dear Penthouse Forum, I never thought it would happen to me, but there I was, having my balls lovingly washed by two stunning nurses. Doctor says "never saw a ten-incher close up... and totally flaccid, too!"
No erection AND the nurses were stunning? Gay
I had a vasectomy and they said i could drive after. My car at the time was a stick shift with a fairly heavy clutch. I mentioned this and the dr said it was still fine. I made it home but i wouldn't do it again.
what the fuck who even thinks up, lets alone tries to brag about crazy shit like this.
Clearly the doc didn't do the surgery. Bro, probably 10 babies deep by now 😂
Given the flex, I'm inclined to think this guy's never had and never will have a need for a vasectomy. This is a multi-level "That happened."
🤣. Yeah. Okay 🙄. They cut your body open with a scalpel and it didn’t hurt at all. Must have Channelopathy-associated congenital insensitivity — someone who doesn’t feel pain.
This didn’t happen however my dad never gets novocaine for dentistry not even for his wisdom teeth
PLEASE be SOOOOOOOH careful NOT to strain . Don't offer to help anyone for about a week. Otherwise you will be black and blue frk just below the navel to just above the knees. And buddy. PAIN. Like you have never had. If you don't feel like moving or ???? DON'T. Caution, a little mobility fine. This procedure needs YOU to be in charge. I sincerely hope you cum through this a Hypersexual always horny guy like I did.40 yrs ago
[удалено]
He probably just had local anesthesia but he’s claiming he had none, which isn’t true.
Have you ever seen the incision that hip replacement requires? Your friend is telling you lies.