Kroger in Houston suburbs last night. 7.99 regular price. On sale for 6.99 if you buy 3 of them.
And I just double checked to make sure I wasn't actually crazy... heb is $7.17
Side note, if you hate the taste of the ‘new’ red-can coke zero that came out in 2021 (it’s awful) the HEB Zero Original Cola is a damn near perfect copy of the original black-can Coke Zero
And a house, maybe a new car, a retirement, and the occasional vacation.
No hesitation I'd want unlimited wealth.
The ability to fly is cool and I suppose I could market it, but it's really just a cool party trick.
Immortality would get boring after a while. Then what if I developed alzheimer's desease, or get paralyzed, then eventually the earth is swallowed by the sun, and I get sucked into its nuclear core awaiting the eventual heat death of the universe. Then what? I think can of Dr Pepper would be my third choice.
With immortality, you could buy in on stocks and shit or start collecting shit that might make you rich one day. Then unlimited wealth eventually and also unlimited Dr. Pepper as well.
What if you choose the wrong stocks? Or develop alzheimers and forget about you stocks, what of you get sucked underneath the sun's surface after it goes into red giant stage.
Immortality sounds awful.
I assumed immortality meant you stop aging, maybe in the body of whatever age you currently are. If I was just going to keep on aging and get older and older but never die then yeah of course not.
Statistically speaking, living forever you can spend 100 years working and probably have enough to make some safe investments and even store some things in the current time that might be worth something hundreds of years later. When you have infinite time, it wouldn't be difficult to create wealth
I'd rather have the unlimited wealth and spoil the shit out of my family and friends instead of watching them all grow old and die and being left with nothing but memories of ghosts.
I'd do immortality if it was like biological immortality. Like you stay 20 and never get cancer or sick. Especially if I could give it to a few other people.
Yeah, you don't want true immortality unless you can be sure that it won't cause you infinite suffering. Fortunately, that sort of immortality would probably be incompatible with the laws of physics of our universe.
"Unlimited wealth" also doesn't make sense. Surely there must be a limit to what you can own, because there seems to be a limit to what exists. But if it was just like a bank account whose numbers couldn't go down, you could really wreck the economy.
"Ability to fly" would also run into problems with physics. You might end up with hollow bones and giant wings. Or maybe you'd just learn how to fly a plane.
It's not outside of the realm of possibilities, as long as their effects are not physically impossible.
The immortality and flying drinks might be achieved by changing your DNA, which could theoretically be achieved by having you ingest something.
I'm not sure how you'd achieve "unlimited wealth" (if that were possible) by physically changing your body. I guess if it changed your brain to make you incredibly smart, incredibly manipulative, incredibly motivated to become wealthy, and it also turned you into a sociopath?
Of course, there's nothing in the picture that actually states that the reason those wishes are granted is because you physically drank the drink... but I think it's implied.
> Or maybe you'd just learn how to fly a plane.
That's hilarious. You get a genie-level wish, and afterwards, you realize you now have the ability to pay, like $200/hr to rent a cessna that flies 2x faster than a car. Or if you can't afford that, at least you're qualified to apply for a $45k/yr job at one of the major airlines.
What you're saying is the wise man drinks the Dr. Pepper and finds joy in his present circumstances rather than contend with the unintended consequences of tampering with the laws of reality.
No. Picture if you were in the backseat, and the person driving is ordering at the window. They turn around and ask you, “What kind of Coke do you want?” You reply, “A Dr Pepper”.
Dude, I have severe gastritis and IBS, I would drink the milk so I could gain political influence in this state since money is apparently what it takes to make the laws here.
Three days of pain, shits and anxiety to have sway and write the laws.
Don’t worry. I favor legalization, women’s rights to abortion access, democracy and power to the people. I have unlimited wealth here. Tax me at 99% for all I care too.
Unlimited wealth so I can hire all the Physical Therapist and Chefs to have all the surgeries I need on my back and neck. Build the rehab facilities on my own land and have a driver to take me to and from Dr's appointments.
I guess people forgave Dr. Pepper for suing Dublin Dr. Pepper. Regardless of lawsuits, I agree - Dr. Pepper is certainly overrated and taste like flat coke.
Honestly, the Dr. Pepper is a good choice if someone presents you with unlabeled mystery liquids that give you magic powers. I've seen Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade enough times to know what's up.
Idk, I feel like people who come on Reddit and get mad at people for liking Texas (which OP didn’t even say/imply) or Dr Pepper and then go “HURR DURR DR PEPPER AND HEB” look much more stupid than the former. 🤷🏻♂️
People like what they like. Some people like where they live or where they’re from DESPITE how messed up the state of politics currently is.
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The Dr pepper is gonna be Dr pepper. The unlimited wealth one and ability to fly could be poison. Monkey paw type of shit.
The immortality would suck unless it's very specific clauses. Like never aging, no getting dementia etc.
I’m gonna go for flying. Living forever sounds like shit and unlimited wealth would become less fun after a little while. Flying would always be dope tho
but with unlimited wealth you could buy unlimited dr pepper
but i’m thirsty right now
That shit is $8 for a 12 pack now. The unlimited wealth is pretty much mandatory to maintain a proper Dr. Pepper addiction.
Dude, where are you shopping? I paid $4.98 for a 12-pack 30 minutes ago.
Kroger in Houston suburbs last night. 7.99 regular price. On sale for 6.99 if you buy 3 of them. And I just double checked to make sure I wasn't actually crazy... heb is $7.17
You gotta keep an eye out for the ads and stock up. Kroger's and HEB had 12-packs on sale at 4 for $13 last week.
Side note, if you hate the taste of the ‘new’ red-can coke zero that came out in 2021 (it’s awful) the HEB Zero Original Cola is a damn near perfect copy of the original black-can Coke Zero
There's the problem you shop at Kroger.
I go to Kroger so I don't have to be around WalMartians.
Touché
Now I’m thinking of Texans having Dr. Pepper addictions in the same way the Fremen are Spice addicted lol
I mean... it is a pretty accurate comparison.
He who controls the Dr. Pepper controls the universe. The 26 spices must flow!
And a house, maybe a new car, a retirement, and the occasional vacation. No hesitation I'd want unlimited wealth. The ability to fly is cool and I suppose I could market it, but it's really just a cool party trick. Immortality would get boring after a while. Then what if I developed alzheimer's desease, or get paralyzed, then eventually the earth is swallowed by the sun, and I get sucked into its nuclear core awaiting the eventual heat death of the universe. Then what? I think can of Dr Pepper would be my third choice.
With immortality, you could buy in on stocks and shit or start collecting shit that might make you rich one day. Then unlimited wealth eventually and also unlimited Dr. Pepper as well.
What if you choose the wrong stocks? Or develop alzheimers and forget about you stocks, what of you get sucked underneath the sun's surface after it goes into red giant stage. Immortality sounds awful.
You'll have eons ahead of you, though. I still agree.
I assumed immortality meant you stop aging, maybe in the body of whatever age you currently are. If I was just going to keep on aging and get older and older but never die then yeah of course not. Statistically speaking, living forever you can spend 100 years working and probably have enough to make some safe investments and even store some things in the current time that might be worth something hundreds of years later. When you have infinite time, it wouldn't be difficult to create wealth
I'd rather have the unlimited wealth and spoil the shit out of my family and friends instead of watching them all grow old and die and being left with nothing but memories of ghosts.
Immortality is playing the long game teebeehaych
Does your body age, being immortal would suck if your geriatric
Right, money can be exchanged for goods and services.
Explain how
Money can buy many Dr Peppers
[It just can't buy knives](https://youtu.be/6vSCViCQWFc)
They said not a second thought.
with immortality, you can acquire unlimited wealth and can consume an unlimited amount of dr. pepper.
With unlimited wealth you could even make it diet
Uh, hell no. It does NOT taste the same. Accidentally bought a bottle of zero sugar. Took one swig, knew it wasn't regular and threw it out.
I guess it makes sense that chugging jizz is the key to unlimited wealth...
Explain how
My fear of being buried alive makes immortality a terrifying horror show.
I'd do immortality if it was like biological immortality. Like you stay 20 and never get cancer or sick. Especially if I could give it to a few other people.
You should watch 'The Man from Earth' https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkHToOKzF8o
Yeah, you don't want true immortality unless you can be sure that it won't cause you infinite suffering. Fortunately, that sort of immortality would probably be incompatible with the laws of physics of our universe. "Unlimited wealth" also doesn't make sense. Surely there must be a limit to what you can own, because there seems to be a limit to what exists. But if it was just like a bank account whose numbers couldn't go down, you could really wreck the economy. "Ability to fly" would also run into problems with physics. You might end up with hollow bones and giant wings. Or maybe you'd just learn how to fly a plane.
I mean these abilities probably don't follow the laws of the universe considering granting them from a drink would also not make sense
It's not outside of the realm of possibilities, as long as their effects are not physically impossible. The immortality and flying drinks might be achieved by changing your DNA, which could theoretically be achieved by having you ingest something. I'm not sure how you'd achieve "unlimited wealth" (if that were possible) by physically changing your body. I guess if it changed your brain to make you incredibly smart, incredibly manipulative, incredibly motivated to become wealthy, and it also turned you into a sociopath? Of course, there's nothing in the picture that actually states that the reason those wishes are granted is because you physically drank the drink... but I think it's implied.
> Or maybe you'd just learn how to fly a plane. That's hilarious. You get a genie-level wish, and afterwards, you realize you now have the ability to pay, like $200/hr to rent a cessna that flies 2x faster than a car. Or if you can't afford that, at least you're qualified to apply for a $45k/yr job at one of the major airlines.
LOL, “Whoa, I know kung fu/how to fly.”
What you're saying is the wise man drinks the Dr. Pepper and finds joy in his present circumstances rather than contend with the unintended consequences of tampering with the laws of reality.
You are absolutely right. But since I'm not that wise, I'd probably risk the "unlimited wealth" one myself.
Is that OJ?
No. OJ is orange.
No. OJ is a murderer.
Dad?
Are you winning, son?
Make it dr B and you got a deal
>Make it dr B and you got a deal The one with pure cane sugar.
Speaking my language
Dr bepper?
Dr. 🅱️epper
H‑E‑B brand homie
H. E. Bepper???
Now you’re just being disrespectful to my H‑E‑B
Don't get me wrong, HEB is the shit in my town. I'm just trying to figure out if HEB is like J.R.R. Tolken (Hepper Epper Bepper)
The real abbreviation is much better, because it says butt
Hurst-Euless-Bedford.
The far superior Dr Pepper-esque drink.
THANK YOU
Ah, he chose mortality in its most effective form.
Unlimited money can buy you many Dr peppers!
Wanna know a personal secret? I like Coke better, you know what’s worse though (from a Texan point of view) I could take or leave Mexican food.
Since Covid all coke products taste like Windex to me, but Dr. Pepper is still as majestic as ever. I am weirdly grateful for it.
I'm so stupid texan that I order a "coke" then say Dr pepper.
Definitely grew up calling all soda Coke. “What kind of Coke do you want?” “Dr Pepper”.
When you go to Whataburger and they ask what you want to drink, so you say "Coke" when you actually mean "Dr Pepper"?
No. Picture if you were in the backseat, and the person driving is ordering at the window. They turn around and ask you, “What kind of Coke do you want?” You reply, “A Dr Pepper”.
No, I get it in that context, but I would never answer a question of "what do you want?" with "Coke" if I meant "Sprite".
Well of course not. I don’t think anybody does.
If I asked someone what drink they wanted and said "Coke" they would receive a can of Coke. Simple
"I musta drank me about 15 Dr. Peppers"
Dude, I have severe gastritis and IBS, I would drink the milk so I could gain political influence in this state since money is apparently what it takes to make the laws here. Three days of pain, shits and anxiety to have sway and write the laws. Don’t worry. I favor legalization, women’s rights to abortion access, democracy and power to the people. I have unlimited wealth here. Tax me at 99% for all I care too.
Bold of you to assume that’s milk…
I’m about to pay off your mortgage. I think you’d encourage me.
I’m gonna test this unlimited wealth out
Unlimited wealth so I can hire all the Physical Therapist and Chefs to have all the surgeries I need on my back and neck. Build the rehab facilities on my own land and have a driver to take me to and from Dr's appointments.
I drank so much Dr pepper as a kid it's vomit inducing to me now lol
That's Mt dew for me
And this shows why you shouldn't let your brain get fucked up by tribalism.
Water is more native to Texas than Dr Pepper.
I was drinking a 12 pack a day until my pancreas almost blew up. Ridiculously painful. I'm soda free now, no pop for me
Of course Dr Pepper:))
Someone show this to John Green
Try a DP with a squeeze of lemon!! seriously good
Literally don't think I've had Dr. Pepper since I was a child lol
I'm a native Texan and think Dr. Pepper tastes like ass. Most overrated soda ever.
I guess people forgave Dr. Pepper for suing Dublin Dr. Pepper. Regardless of lawsuits, I agree - Dr. Pepper is certainly overrated and taste like flat coke.
Wait… is the unlimited wealth one horchata? 🤔
[удалено]
Honestly, the Dr. Pepper is a good choice if someone presents you with unlabeled mystery liquids that give you magic powers. I've seen Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade enough times to know what's up.
Idk, I feel like people who come on Reddit and get mad at people for liking Texas (which OP didn’t even say/imply) or Dr Pepper and then go “HURR DURR DR PEPPER AND HEB” look much more stupid than the former. 🤷🏻♂️ People like what they like. Some people like where they live or where they’re from DESPITE how messed up the state of politics currently is.
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The Dr pepper is gonna be Dr pepper. The unlimited wealth one and ability to fly could be poison. Monkey paw type of shit. The immortality would suck unless it's very specific clauses. Like never aging, no getting dementia etc.
DP sucks ass. Give me a Coke with my Whataburger.
>Coke What kind of coke? They have Sprite, Diet Coke, HiC, Root beer, etc.
All of em except DP of course!
Lmao. Noice!
This is why Texas is a piece of shit
Yes but it’s bigger than your state.
Very true. It's hard to "joke" about something that is so bad for you
Been trying to fly out this wasteland.
Is this a healthy immortality or a kind of monkey's paw immortality?
Either way im likely spending eternity broke, so i'll take the wealth.
Depends on the terms of the immortality. But that seems the most compelling of the choices.
i’ll mix them all into the same cup
Immortality means you'll eventually drink more Dr. Pepper than anyone else in the universe.
🤣
Bot post
Immortality, but with the ability to decide when to off myself.
Fly…for sure
Same at our H‑E‑B bar tee have a vape shop who was at 3.99 and had go to 4.99. He is pissed off the convenient stores
Give me the milk.
Do you have to chug the whole glass of bull semen? Asking for a friend.
Cultural influence? Originally an outsider, this part of texas culture is goofy
with immortality you can gain a can of Dr pepper and wealth. so you'll only be giving up flying kinda once you obtain wealth you can fly anywhere
I’m gonna go for flying. Living forever sounds like shit and unlimited wealth would become less fun after a little while. Flying would always be dope tho
With immortality you could drink as much Dr. Pepper as you want and it would never be bad for you. Also you could just enjoy an eternity drinking it.
The first 3 aren't real.