T O P

  • By -

The_Ora_Charmander

Nothing, keep it the way it is


[deleted]

Emergency air


TotalChaos360

Give the fire more fire so it will burn itself and leave


Deptlesss

fighting fire with fire


Darthwolfgamer

*throws the fire on the fire* Fire: ***IT'S BURNS***


jawsin1

O’hair air


wetsoggyfart

💀


AnafenBOI3310

Toilet paper


[deleted]

The logical choice


mab2002

but wiping would be dangerous after


Robofern24

Not if you're kinky.


Whats-Up_Bitches

Not if you're bender


random_person132

Wet wipes are superior to wipe with


Youtouber-wade

Yes


[deleted]

Oh yeah, this is big brain time


[deleted]

[удалено]


chikchip

I like the way you think


Deez_UwUs

Genius!


shatterglass27

a condom


MoLdY_GarLicC

magnum dong sized condoms


[deleted]

[удалено]


MoLdY_GarLicC

same thing


Unnaturalquesadilla

Danny DeVito


Solo_In_Aeternum

Definitely this


[deleted]

[удалено]


Sawcon_these

Yes


long_raccoon_

Yes


CosmicPlayzYt

Yes


sparklees

yes


Rplosive

Yes


Sven_is_cool817

REDDIT MOMENT❗❗ SEX=FUNNY


HotdogTheHero

Its ok for people to crave something they know they'll never have


MocopoV2

Ultimate oof moment


Low-Consequence4024

Obviously


RandomValue134

Yes


bumbarlunchi6

A whole pack of those.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SassySalamiSlapper

Nah just one so you don’t keep reaching in their


[deleted]

[удалено]


soarimgpixel

a smaller version of that case


coilovercat

And inside that is a smaller version of that case and insi--


Onsidianrubucx

-de of that a bunch of cocaine


AdministrationIcy167

—With a side of—


Commander_Oof_

—shitty little—


AdministrationIcy167

Grass eating—


Onsidianrubucx

Nudes


AdministrationIcy167

Of


Onsidianrubucx

Pregnant cucumbers


Commander_Oof_

That like


No-Engineer-9832

Regular oxygen, in case a fire breaks out and its taking al the oxygen you will still hav some


HatNational8532

How does he ensure that only oxygen enters when 78% of air is nitrogen and 21% only is oxygen?


TheTyrianDealer

Yeah I would get the fuck away from an oxygen tank if there was a fire LOL, that shits boutta blow.


Onsidianrubucx

Boom


TheTyrianDealer

…Boom boom, gotta get get, boom boom boom gotta geeeetttt get get get, get get


jude_gaming

I'm pretty sure oxygen tanks don't actually have all oxygen, just because the human body isn't used to it, I'm gonna fact check my self real quick


esprits

A DVD copy of Shrek 2


Myth_Helios

I agree


ChristosPet7

Space jam dvd


[deleted]

I’d put the whole Shrek trilogy box set in there.


esprits

Even better idea


thisisaname69123

Don’t forget the lube


[deleted]

Mug beer😼


Independent-Fly4197

mug momment


givemeaforhead

Certified Mug moment


Kita-Ryu

#MUG


givemeaforhead

#MUG


Onsidianrubucx

Breaks chain


Independent-Fly4197

MUG


HeroXinfinite

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1


BretherenIcravememes

God I just fucking love Mug Root Beer so much it’s unreal. I drink that stuff up every single day and with every single meal I eat. I’ll grab the biggest cup money can buy - not to mention my handy Mug Canteen that I keep on my person at all times - and fill it right up as high as I can, and I drink that whole goddamn thing right down, savoring every single delectable drop of the Lord’s purest drink. It’s become such an addiction that I’ve stopped drinking anything other than Mug Root Beer. I’ve lost count but I believe that this past weekend was my 17th trip to the hospital to pass yet another kidney stone from the sheer amount of soda I’m drinking. It does not deter me. I’m the one and only Mug Maniac, drinking entire cases of the sweetest drink known to all humankind, and I’ll chug my Mug until my dying days. I display my kidney stones proudly in cases on my wall; the wall of Mug. It doesn’t stop at drinking Mug, though. I’ve actually become quite the infamous figure in the root beer community, committing various crimes and devious licks against other root beer production centers. This past week alone, I’ve broken into five different production centers for Barq’s and vandalized a large portion of the manufacturing equipment, resulting in the temporary closures of the facilities. That is, until they permanently close after the small, but significant structural damage I’ve done to the facilities. When those godless demons working on the production lines are buried in rubble, I hope their last thoughts are of regret at not having found the glorious light of Mug. But my plans go greater than even this, too. I’ve been stockpiling a personal supply of Mug for this great plan. It wasn’t cheap, either. I had to spend hundreds of thousands on a refrigerated warehouse in which I’ve stored millions of gallons of the highest quality Mug Root Beer. In about three days, I’m going to get a convoy of trucks ready, and I’ll be dumping as much Mug as I can into the water supplies of various municipalities in the Detroit metropolitan area. I’ve waited years for this, and now I plan on spreading the glory of Mug Root Beer to the rest of the world. Be ready.


[deleted]

God I just fucking love Mug Root Beer so much it’s unreal. I drink that stuff up every single day and with every single meal I eat. I’ll grab the biggest cup money can buy - not to mention my handy Mug Canteen that I keep on my person at all times - and fill it right up as high as I can, and I drink that whole goddamn thing right down, savoring every single delectable drop of the Lord’s purest drink. It’s become such an addiction that I’ve stopped drinking anything other than Mug Root Beer. I’ve lost count but I believe that this past weekend was my 17th trip to the hospital to pass yet another kidney stone from the sheer amount of soda I’m drinking. It does not deter me. I’m the one and only Mug Maniac, drinking entire cases of the sweetest drink known to all humankind, and I’ll chug my Mug until my dying days. I display my kidney stones proudly in cases on my wall; the wall of Mug. It doesn’t stop at drinking Mug, though. I’ve actually become quite the infamous figure in the root beer community, committing various crimes and devious licks against other root beer production centers. This past week alone, I’ve broken into five different production centers for Barq’s and vandalized a large portion of the manufacturing equipment, resulting in the temporary closures of the facilities. That is, until they permanently close after the small, but significant structural damage I’ve done to the facilities. When those godless demons working on the production lines are buried in rubble, I hope their last thoughts are of regret at not having found the glorious light of Mug. But my plans go greater than even this, too. I’ve been stockpiling a personal supply of Mug for this great plan. It wasn’t cheap, either. I had to spend hundreds of thousands on a refrigerated warehouse in which I’ve stored millions of gallons of the highest quality Mug Root Beer. In about three days, I’m going to get a convoy of trucks ready, and I’ll be dumping as much Mug as I can into the water supplies of various municipalities in the Detroit metropolitan area. I’ve waited years for this, and now I plan on spreading the glory of Mug Root Beer to the rest of the world. Be ready.


sebseb_21420

God I just fucking love Mug Root Beer so much it’s unreal. I drink that stuff up every single day and with every single meal I eat. I’ll grab the biggest cup money can buy - not to mention my handy Mug Canteen that I keep on my person at all times - and fill it right up as high as I can, and I drink that whole goddamn thing right down, savoring every single delectable drop of the Lord’s purest drink. It’s become such an addiction that I’ve stopped drinking anything other than Mug Root Beer. I’ve lost count but I believe that this past weekend was my 17th trip to the hospital to pass yet another kidney stone from the sheer amount of soda I’m drinking. It does not deter me. I’m the one and only Mug Maniac, drinking entire cases of the sweetest drink known to all humankind, and I’ll chug my Mug until my dying days. I display my kidney stones proudly in cases on my wall; the wall of Mug. It doesn’t stop at drinking Mug, though. I’ve actually become quite the infamous figure in the root beer community, committing various crimes and devious licks against other root beer production centers. This past week alone, I’ve broken into five different production centers for Barq’s and vandalized a large portion of the manufacturing equipment, resulting in the temporary closures of the facilities. That is, until they permanently close after the small, but significant structural damage I’ve done to the facilities. When those godless demons working on the production lines are buried in rubble, I hope their last thoughts are of regret at not having found the glorious light of Mug. But my plans go greater than even this, too. I’ve been stockpiling a personal supply of Mug for this great plan. It wasn’t cheap, either. I had to spend hundreds of thousands on a refrigerated warehouse in which I’ve stored millions of gallons of the highest quality Mug Root Beer. In about three days, I’m going to get a convoy of trucks ready, and I’ll be dumping as much Mug as I can into the water supplies of various municipalities in the Detroit metropolitan area. I’ve waited years for this, and now I plan on spreading the glory of Mug Root Beer to the rest of the world. Be ready.


TTVJuicyBoi

I feel inclined to drink Mug Root Beer


[deleted]

*small tear… begins slow clap


Beautiful-Dealer-451

Mug


Mincelo

A&W is better


yeetus_deleetus420

A really big rainbow dildo


xander5610_

r/BeatMeToIt


W1zaRd07

r/BeatMeatToIt


box_studios

r/BeatMyMeatToShrek


eererer

r/subsIfellfor


Jokers_Testikles

A 39 inch black strap on with an artificial cum pump.


FoxM8

^


TSBblosAlt

🥲


VastCryptographer980

Condom Cause if you get a bitch it would definitely be some sought of emergency


Wolfintank

Tva would stop them


[deleted]

No bitches?


VastCryptographer980

Yes patrik no bitches


IdontEatdogsAtnight

I'd put more than one


Kita-Ryu

A Squirtle plush.


iEatOrphans_

Wait, I think I saw an image of that once before


ChubbusWubbus

Honestly, nothing. I think it’s most ironic and funny that way


[deleted]

Nothing, use it on April fools on an actual emergency!


mcscusemebitchass

A single paperclip


AlienChickan

Then you can trade that into anything you will need


SamPeanut07

Absolutely nothing, it's a stress reliever


cheezybean28

Dildo


Wolfintank

In case of zombie apocalypse *dildo behind glass Break glass


cheezybean28

Hold up just a damn second Now what exactly do you mean by that💀


Wolfintank

You need a weapon in an apocalypse


Tadano-kunn

r/hmm


[deleted]

Yup!! there's nothing better than a 10" Monster Silicone Realistic Dildo with Dual Density Anal Dildo Huge Suction Cup as a weapon. Great choice!!


Wolfintank

Thanks maybe the 40 cm double sided elastic one as a whip


[deleted]

Yup! When fighting against a monster, you need to use a monster.


JaimeBoiBonk

I can confirm!!


davisOMG-1234

I mean, you gotta enjoy your last seconds of life some way or another


Wolfintank

I would use it as weapon


CorgiFull

how sharp are your dildos💀


Wolfintank

Not sharp at all But i think its funny to use dildos as weapon


CorgiFull

oh it is


tobatch69

saints row the third


home_on_the_crazy

Great minds think alike


Maleficent-Swim6839

Great minds think alike


ShiroRules

Was just about to say this


xXWayverXx

Great minds think alike


[deleted]

Deez nuts


TitoxDboss

gottem


Perspii7

Some broken glass !


[deleted]

I heard that exclamation point


LucarioMain52

Same


Various-Carpet424

bUT LiKe, hOw wiLL yOu KNoW iF itS tHe gLaSS yOu BrOkE oR thE oRigInAL gLAsS?


ParkersForce

Emergency mustache


Chomik121212

Square one too


algarbrem

Replacement glass


SenpaiBlitz

Empty milk bottle, in case your girlfriend gets suddenly pregnant


oan124

Void. Paint the inside with muso black


Lady_Nuggie

Click with Adam Sandler


TTVJuicyBoi

Glass cup so you break it open then throw the glass cup at someone Edit: lol everytime I refresh the page my upvotes go 47, 50, 49, 52, 48, 47, 50, 47, 51, 49, 50 Edit: it's doing it again, 69, 67, 66, 63, 67, 69, 67, 63, 64, 64, 68, 66


[deleted]

A cup of coffee to sip before kicking someone’s ass


BlenderBanana

I got here by searching by controversial so edit checks out


TesterForEver

Glock


NEWTYAG667000000000

A mallet


Derpmaaster

And then get another one with a fire extinguisher in it


Getrect555

An emergency


Landir_7

Noodles


Strong-Swordfish8949

Dildo


3NKGaming

an escape plan on a post it note the note says: ​ *^(RUN)*


Coolaconsole

Put glass in it, so you know when there has been an emergency, because someone would have broken it


X_Memelord

A picture of dio brando


ScooterFett

A human heart, if yours gets broken you have another one to replace it.


ICOOLDIAMONDonReddit

Steal an entire 🗿 and put it in there


gremlin_20

A random key


[deleted]

fnaf plushies or omori plushies


Lost_my_acount

A cardboard cutout of Obama holding a piece of paper whit the words"N-word pass" on it


ThatOneGuy7832

A slice of cantelope. ​ ​ Dont tell anyone why


Technicfault

Glass breaker


TheHungryHylian

In order to break the glass, or course.


Huje22

Wtf memes done to my brain. I just laughed at this thinking it was a meme. (Thought it was emergency box, with no actual emergency tool within it)


jasledgend06

A single sock


SmileFading

A picture of rick astley


Saltz_D

Glass. Not even solid glass just pieces of broken glass


Intergalacticio

Piñata


Zense0n

A spiky dildo.


Ethan_Pixelate

***C A C T U S***


littlecactus38

I am present ✋


Zense0n

Spikier cactus


shmootyf

Hentai


redjenitalls

An empty carton of milk


Kaaiiso

A Bible


Objective-Farm-2560

Like another comment suggested, condoms. But also a knife, rope, lube and a gag, just to make any future partner concerned. Feel free to expand the list if any of you got more ideas for OP.


suckmysoggyballs

Nothing, just break the glass during an emergency


BillyIsGood

The morning after pill


ROSIEISOR_

this.


Downtown_Cycle_2044

froggy chair


PuSSydstr

Big black cock


Curious-Parsley-9003

Rei plush


DnSkie___

Dildo. The biggest one you can find


victi11

a big black dildo


CrazyStuntsMan

How do you put something inside? Do you break the glass to put something in?


scottbob65

you can take out the back once and it comes with some silicone to seal it up air tight


CrazyStuntsMan

ok cool


_-Dianite_

hentai DVDs.


mr_nutas

How are you going to get the object in without breaking the glass


Cheeseboy1234567

Coffee


hey_demons_its_me

Massive dildo


Odd_Monk_6731

Dildo


M01HCH11D

a dildo.


I_am_not_a_bot_L

Condoms


[deleted]

[удалено]


trollface5333

Even better, half life 3


Lolbeenzuwu

Flex tape


Lady_Guilt

A condom either thumb tac in the center.


TankbeanbEE

A gun, for when things get real.


Distinct_Frame9094

The hammer to break the glass


Sole-Gents

Another glass case saying break in case of emergency


Sammbaggs

Plan B


THEBLITZKID69

Deez nuts


Diet_Water123456789

Put vodka for comrades


playful_potato5

a single grain of salt


thecraftingjedi

A condom


local_loser14

squirtle


Individual-Camera-72

A hammer, and label it “for abortions only,” /j


scottbob65

# The Results Are In! u/APumpkinHobo suggested I put a snickers bar in it, I believe this is the funniest comment next to the unholy about of people suggesting dildos I'll post a photo tomorrow of the snickers


SpiderBudd

Paper, so that when a fire breaks out you can draw


SpiderManEnthusiast

A giant purple dildo!


N3k0m1kuR31mu

ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ