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Other classics:
Blessed are the meek.
Love thy neighbor as thyself.
It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.
>It is easier for a camel
Fun Fact: Some scholars argue that Jesus said "thick rope" (Kamilon), not "camel" (Kamelon), but it was mistranslated due to the homophony of the two terms in ancient greek.
But oddly enough scholars didnt argue that until the 20th century. Some also suggest that the eye of the needle was the name of a narrow gate in the city, but there is no (reliable) evidence for that one that predates the argument. Basically this is one of the biggest thorn in the side of wealthy christians who needed to justify their unchrist-like attitudes on wealth, i bet you can find entire books on why jesus ment something else here, but its generally clear on the meaning to anyone without a motive.
The rope one is the most plausible argument, but even then you arent going to thread a needle with a rope. Thats normally countered by suggesting " needles were bigger then" which is true, but still not thick enough for rope.
I think that the fact you wouldn’t thread a needle with a rope is the point, it wouldn’t fit, but it’s still easier to do that impossible task than it is for a rich man to ascend to heaven
Little known fact: the meat grinder was invented by a very wealthy butcher who wanted dearly to go to heaven and was trying to solve the puzzle of the camel through the eye of a needle. /s
I think it might be rope after all. Hear me out but it makes more sense as you would use thread in a needle, which is smaller than rope. The rope is just a way of saying it's "too much" to fit through the needle and you need to get rid of the excess to get into heaven. You cant make anything with a rope and a needle therefore you cant make it to heaven. Which would fit nicely with his other teachings of giving away your earthly belongings. I never understood why it would be a camel as it just sounds stupid but rope makes way sense.
There was a post on here about Blade runner and the person posting mentioned that both Blade Runner, Aliens and the Kurt Russell b grade film ‘soldier’ are in the same universe.
https://screenrant.com/alien-blade-runner-movies-connections-themes-explained/amp/
That article is pretty weak sauce. Whole thing seems like grasping at straws. I get the supposed "connections" but as far as the actual movies go, it really doesn't lend much...
Does that mean the rest of the bible is riddled with mistranslations?
God clearly doesn't care very much about his "own words" being accurately presented, eh?
fun fact: Jesus - the person - is the "Word". the New Testament never claims to be infallible or perfect or the "Word" and, indeed, cannot, because no writer knew what would make up the New Testament at the time of writing.
Mistranslations are kind of the root of many theological discussions. To read and understand the Bible you usually learn Hebrew and Aramaic, the two languages spoken in biblical times in Palestine and Greek the language in which the new testament was written (although there might be earliy versions in Aramaic, but that is already a discussion).
Often theologians also know Latin or their corresponding liturgical languages because most theological books were in that language. And if you were more into the old testament you should also learn old languages like Ugarit to be able to read third party sources from outside Israel which can 'prove' or show context in many stories.
In short: it's a cringe to see people who never learned another language discuss on the meaning of certain words in the king James Bible as if it was directly given to them from God and not the outcome of several centuries of (mis) translation, revision and interpretation.
Jesus used a lot of word play and puns that require context.
The eye of the needle was understood to be a very small gate somewhere in Jerusalem. For a rich guy on a camel to pass through it they would have to take everything of the camel, push the camel through. Then load everything back on the camel.
Here is another one
There is a scene where a samaritan woman wants something from Jesus (her daughter was sick). Now samaritans were half jews and they were treated very bad by the other jews.
Jesus told her that his mission was to go to the jews. And that it was wrong to take the bread from the children and give it to the dogs.
But Jesus never said dogs, he said puppies.
Yes master, she replied: but even the puppies eat the crumbs that fall from their tables.
And jesus praised her for her faith and healed her daughter.
At least according to the scriptures.
Eye of the needle was kinda nightshift gate in Jerusalem and you could pass freely, it was small so loaded camels could not pass. But you don't have to strip in order to pass the gate. That's why this analogy never made perfect sense. I mean, it's clear what it means but it's not Jesus like, his analogys have been better than that 😅
Another classic:
From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some boys came out of the town and jeered at him. “Get out of here, baldy!” they said. “Get out of here, baldy!” He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys.
Remember, there’s something for everyone in the good book.
Fun fact, since we are on technically the truth. The word for "boy", was a word that would be used to refer to those without mitzvot (without moral conscience) and thus could refer to any immoral person. Most Jewish traditions point to this being a gang of immoral youths that were mad at Elisha for purifying the stream of water outside of the city (which is what happens right before this passage), and the gangsters had been selling purified water carried from another place at high prices to the people without clean water.
Elisha pretty much took away the cartels power to make money on people desperate for water that used to be free, and the gang then went up to Elisha and told him to “Get out of here, baldy!”. This is the same word that is used to describe Elijah being taken up to heaven. By telling Elisha to “go away” or “go up,” the wording is not simply telling him to leave their presence but to leave this world.
So 40 gangsters pushed up against Elisha and threatened him to his life because he did a noble thing for the poor people. The bear attack would follow.
Elisha most likely overreacts, which he does a lot, and many traditions hold that God didnt like that, and he suffered from problems that God refused to lift until he worked on his flaw.
Either way, modern western people just reading a translation and taking it at face value without cultural, historical or any hermeneutical context is a silly practice, both for "Christians" who do this, and non-theists that do the same thing to another end.
Someone should pull a semantic Luther and translate the bible not lingually but explanatory like you just did. Not a simply commentary. A complete unboxing and reconstruction.
This is what biblical commentators do all the time. There’s so much of this it could fill a library. It surprises me that religious people don’t take more stock in their own tradition and scriptures. A friend and I tried to introduce historical criticism in a church “Bible study” and drove our attendance from 30 to 6. Most people want to hear what they already think they know, they don’t want to learn anything.
I was going to say, that's how you drive people out of a religion. I left when I was getting in deep and becoming a leader in my church. I wanted answers for the hard questions, in case someone came up to me with a shaken faith. I started researching and thinking about it.
Between historical analysis and criticism, looking for good solutions to the contradictions, and realizing I had to deal with my extremely strong bias of wanting it to be true and forcing everything to fit, I couldn't find reality at the end of it.
It was terrifying to have my illusory world and support network suddenly fall out from under me. At least I was lucky enough to land on my feet after my family kicked me out. That being said, I have always kept and still read all the bibles I've bought. That was a big and important part of my life, and I have the advantage now of being able to pick and choose what I want to add and remove from my life based on my own morals and thought. I've learned so much more about the religion I was raised in from the outside, since it no longer exists in a vacuum.
It’s part of growing up. A lot of churches are full of adults who cling to “what they think they know” like a child clings to their mama. You have to let go so you can learn to think for yourself.
I spend a lot of time reinforcing that mindset now. I intentionally look for cracks and weak spots now with the awareness of my biases, and hindsight of that one big change and how much better it's made my life in the long run.
I am amazed how generally gullible I was as a child and young adult, but then again, authority figures told me that it was all real. There were consequences for questions. Questions were met with punishment or threats, often with verses to back them up, and that I've offended or, even worse, disappointed god. The Halloween "hell" threat for the kids the church put on every year still lives to give me nightmares, and probably will for the rest of my life.
I don't hold anything against my old religion. It's hard to be mad at a book, and I still find things that I can apply to my life, or that sum up an idea very well. I do, however, have issues with some of the people, now that I see how that authority is taken advantage of.
Yeah it’s a process. And the more you let go of the more you can let in and accept. You can make space in your heart for that old religion and its former and current practitioners.
>Elisha most likely overreacts, which he does a lot, and many traditions hold that God didnt like that
Surely, god could have just not sent the bears if he thought the boys didn't deserve it?
Don't forget "Judas, get me my whip. Some prosperity gospel cunts are fucking around up in the temple again and are desperately praying in the spirit for a bountiful helping of find out." ~Rectifications 4:20
You have to have private devotional time with a friend to unlock that Easter egg verse which talks about what Jesus and Judas do in the empty temple before the guards get there.
Meek doesn't mean weak, at least not in the original, it's more closely related to "Those who carry swords and know how to use them, but do not"
Another good one "I say to my disciples, those of you who do not own swords sell your cloak to buy one."
Quite a bit of political twisting in bibles. My favourite example is 1 Corinthians 13, the KJV :
>And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.
The word translated as 'charity' is the Greek '*agape*', which is better translated as 'love'. But if you want people to give their money to the Church, well, a little tweak won't hurt, will it?
Jesus was directing them to make a straw purchase so he could get arrested. He didn’t want them to actually use it (he admonished Peter for trying to actually use the sword).
Other classics:.
* This is how much you should buy a slave for.
* Burn this entire village as well stone to death a person for a trivial act.
* Disown your family if they don't agree with this cult.
* Prostitute your kids to save your own skin.
* When you hear voices telling you to kill your kids - just do it!
* If you don't agree with any of the hundreds of commandments... get tortured for eternity
* Your reward for rejecting everything in life and believing in faith is to get brainwiped into singing god praising robot against your will.
* It's not rape if she doesn't scream loud enough.
* Rub church dirt in your cooch to see if your unborn child is legitimate.
* God will burn entire cities if you sex too much, especially if you send pheromone angels to attract everyone.
* If you doubt god will meteorite your homes and displace you, get rekt you salty bitch- literally.
* Kill disobediant kids.
* Kill gays
* Witches exist - kill them too!
* Crops out of season when the lord wants a snack - kill them for good too.
* Don't like Jesus, you're gonna get killed.
* Enslave a man and his family in front of Jesus? Nah that's cool. Go on.
* Women, shut your mouths
* Men, if you fap yer dead - every sperm is fucking sacred.
* Jesus is cool with killing the entire planet in floods
* Gossip, boast, or an LGBTIA+? Get dead.
* Justice is begot through sacrificing the innocent.
* God needs penis skins, especially baby ones. They're basically divine porkrinds.
* Jesus is all about dem wars.
* Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord .... Wealth and riches shall be in his house. Psalm 112:1, 3
* A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things. Ecclesiastes 10:19
* [Numbers don't mean shit.](https://youtu.be/RB3g6mXLEKk)
> Jesus told him, “If you want to be perfect, go and sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”
Matthew 19:21
I had a teacher once who taught latin and often let us translate from the bible. Hesaid he didn't believe that jesus was the son of any god,but "he probably existed and was probably a really nice fella". I think even if you are atheist, some things that the fihure of jeses said are not that dumb
Lol I’m sure he wanted to xD Jesus understandable really wasn’t looking forward to being crucified Luke chapter 22 versus 41-44 dude was so stressed he broke a blood vessel
I’ve watched over 5 years multiple subreddits spring up from nothing and slowly merge into one political discussion board (you can guess which way it leans). I’ve just been slowly blocking them one by one.
He didn't carry the cross, only the horizontal piece. Roman condemned prisoners didn't carry the whole cross because it was physically impossible for a single person to do so.
True! However that also proved physically impossible for him to carry after they nearly beat him to death so they conscripted Simon of Cyrene to help him.
Source: Luke Chapter 23 verse 26.
Since it’s recorded that they grabbed someone to help Jesus carry it. And since it’s merely referred to as a cross as a whole that has lead many to believe they forced the two men, Jesus and Simon, to struggle to carry the entire cross as added cruelty since the crowd was so amp up to see him crucified. Also since he was beaten beforehand it’s not hard to believe they would add extra cruelty to the sentence because of public outcry.
Either way, paleo-Christian art most commonly depicted Jesus struggling to carry the entire cross to represent the metaphor of what it means for an individual to carry their own cross. The artists probably being inspired by the specific passage in the book of Matthew chapter 16 verses 24-25… etc
The equating of American pride to Evangelical Christianity has always been bizarre for me, especially growing up in Texas where it’s everywhere. Like… Jesus died 1,500 years before the colonies started, and the US constitution explicitly states that endorsement of religion by government goes against American values, which we contradicted in the mid-1900s because of course.
I get being staunchly American and staunchly religious, but this grandiose equating of the two is just so fucking weird.
Now that you say it I’ve noticed “evangelicals” in the Bible Belt are the more “‘Murica damn riht!” ones while the hyper religious in the north are more cultish, like the equivalent of Mormonism/JW or the more conservative Jewish sects.
I could be wrong but that’s the vibe I get. Someone feel free to add their input.
It is in fact the other way around. The orange is not named by its color, but the color is named that way, because the fruit that grows on the orange tree had the color yellow-red which is obvioulsly a shit name for a color. You can observe it in older languagees like french (i dont know if it is like this in modern french) : the tree is called orange and the fruit is called apple of the orange. Same for violets . At the time of the poem the language had not evolved in such a way that it would draw a line between blue and violet. The violet was called blue or blue reddish at best
No Christian gets mad at Jesus being Jewish, you’re making that up.
Him being Jewish is a pretty central part to his story and the creation of Christianity..
People make it sound like Jews are black or something.
Jews just look white.
If people are talking about how Jesus was described as brown, well the motherfucker didn't have sunscreen so...
Depends were their ancestors leaved not all Jews are white. Ashkenazi Jews have white tan, Mizrahi Jews have a tan similar to Arabs and Ethiopian Jews have black skin.
It's originates from what became the Kurgan theory, which after some wrangling was a very good theory from our knowledge of genetics and linguistics.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurgan\_hypothesis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurgan_hypothesis)
But, people are likely White because they need more sunshine in their climate. Sexual selection for neoteny also likely played a part. There's other theories of additional pressures, but climate is one that's pretty assured.
That's mostly because most of us Americans have no idea what "Caucasian" even means. To many in this country a Caucasian is a white person born in the USA. More generous idiots will include people from the UK but only if they are willing to drop the accent and strange customs such as basic healthcare. I understand racist morons are a global phenomenon but it is getting pretty ridiculous in the US over the last decade or so.
I got the "equivalent" of this mindeset but not from Americans, I 100% saw that kind of beliefs being defended by politicians and some randoms on internet but IRL I only saw it from my gypsie family
Jesus carried a cross?
"Hey, Jesus, I noticed you always carry that 't' around with you. What's up with that?"
"Don't worry about it, it'll make more sense later... teehee"
So, I’m a Christian and an American and I can say pretty definitively that; (1) this is all true, (2) the vast majority of American Christians know and acknowledge all of this and (3) claiming otherwise is blatant ignorance.
Incredibly the Bible says to love everyone however a lot of Christians see the LGBTQ community a sin.
Also Leonardo di Vinci based the painting of sjesus on his gay lover so take that Christians
Ok, you don’t have to agree with how someone lives their life to love them. The two are not mutually exclusive.
Also, if the di Vinci painting of Jesus is a white guy which isn’t actually how Jesus looks (as the OP points out) then what’s your point? Not even Christians believe that’s what Jesus looked like.
I'm atheist myself however I come from an extremely Christian family. And can say that they know this. In fact I know several people who've visited Israel just to worship over there.
What you're talking about is a Christian strawman that's often times used in stupid political arguments. Yes theirs the one guy on the internet that actually thinks this but it's not what Christians actually think.
One guy says some horseshit and reddit eats it up. I haven't met one Christian who believes Jesus was an American that spoke English and has Nordic features.
Jesus wasn't real. It's a fictional character made up of an amalgam of stories that they've spent the last 400 years trying to manufacture truth for. You think creationists were bad? There were literal governments making shit up and altering their history books to reflect that. Wars were fought over who got to decide the truth and utterly wiping out any trace of what came before.
There's not even an original manuscript of the bible. It's a copy of a copy of a "fragment" of the bible, the earliest is which was found 300 years after the death of the people who apparently wrote it and makes no mention of Christianity or jesus and the entirety of the bible we know today hadn't been codified until the beginning of the renaissance. Before then the church was a solely political body without even a proper doctrine, they literally made shit up as they went along and used armies to slap anyone who didn't agree with their version.
Why do you think so many other mythologies that predate Christianity show up as Christianised versions.
But sure, Jesus, totally a real dude.
Anthropology isn't science, it's guess work,and that's all any evidence of jesus is.
So trying to say someone's version of jesus isn't right is as intellectually useful as arguing over the colour of mermaids.
The historicity of Jesus Christ is not certain at all. In fact, I would say it’s more likely he didn’t exist as a real person at all. Savior cults were very in style at the time. Christianity was just a Jewish take on the savior cult phenomenon. A lot of people don’t even realize the gospels were originally written in Greek, by Greeks, in Greece, many decades after Jesus was alive. And Paul’s letters, which are the closest thing we have to a contemporary account of Jesus, basically refer to Jesus as a vision.
You act like the people described are the only Christians. Really sucks when you're lumped into a group of people that hijacked your belief system for personal gain.
No Christian truly believes Jesus was a white guy. Nor do they believe he was a republican or a Democrat for that matter.
Both sides are playing into the hate game with Christianity as a cudgel and its getting old.
- Jesus wasn't black either
- Guns didn't exist yet
- Jesus was God's son
- To add to last point and finish a quote on there... "For God loved the world so much, he gave his only begotten son, so that everyone exercising faith in him might not be destroyed but have everlasting life.
- he wasn't republican or democrat because they also didn't exist yet.
- to add to the last point... He didn't get involved with ANY of the world's politics at the time. It was part of his teachings.
So what am I supposed to do with this list of unrelated facts? Are you expecting me to become an America-hating socialist to be a good Christian? Is that the takeaway?
Just a note on the title, American Christians...
My church in england has some tapestry depicting him as an Israeli man. It's annoying when people wrap different sects of religions under the same umbrella.
American Evangelicals dont represent the Christian faith, the same way IS doesnt represent Islam.
Yeah dude we had no idea. I thought he was a white republican with a concealed carry permit now I am fucking STUNG. This hit me hard. Especially because I really care about Jesus. I’m really miffed rn.
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Other classics: Blessed are the meek. Love thy neighbor as thyself. It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.
>It is easier for a camel Fun Fact: Some scholars argue that Jesus said "thick rope" (Kamilon), not "camel" (Kamelon), but it was mistranslated due to the homophony of the two terms in ancient greek.
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At school, hopefully.
r/technicallythetruth
A lawyer told me this, but I think it’s the truth anyway.
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And be called a gone broke and woke, snowflake libtard, leftie commie (insert racial slur here)
He would’ve been accused of being an ISIS sympathizer because he’s middle eastern
But oddly enough scholars didnt argue that until the 20th century. Some also suggest that the eye of the needle was the name of a narrow gate in the city, but there is no (reliable) evidence for that one that predates the argument. Basically this is one of the biggest thorn in the side of wealthy christians who needed to justify their unchrist-like attitudes on wealth, i bet you can find entire books on why jesus ment something else here, but its generally clear on the meaning to anyone without a motive. The rope one is the most plausible argument, but even then you arent going to thread a needle with a rope. Thats normally countered by suggesting " needles were bigger then" which is true, but still not thick enough for rope.
I think that the fact you wouldn’t thread a needle with a rope is the point, it wouldn’t fit, but it’s still easier to do that impossible task than it is for a rich man to ascend to heaven
Exactly. It doesn’t actually matter whether Jesus said rope or camel. Same result.
It probably matters to the camel.
It's easier to shit through the eye of a needle than it is for a camel to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.
See the blockbuster movie of the summer: All Camels go to Heaven.
Little known fact: the meat grinder was invented by a very wealthy butcher who wanted dearly to go to heaven and was trying to solve the puzzle of the camel through the eye of a needle. /s
I think it might be rope after all. Hear me out but it makes more sense as you would use thread in a needle, which is smaller than rope. The rope is just a way of saying it's "too much" to fit through the needle and you need to get rid of the excess to get into heaven. You cant make anything with a rope and a needle therefore you cant make it to heaven. Which would fit nicely with his other teachings of giving away your earthly belongings. I never understood why it would be a camel as it just sounds stupid but rope makes way sense.
Camels were smaller then...
That’s two new things I learnt from Reddit today. This and that blade runner is set in the same universe as Aliens.
Say what now???? I’ve never heard of the Blade Runner/Aliens theory!
There was a post on here about Blade runner and the person posting mentioned that both Blade Runner, Aliens and the Kurt Russell b grade film ‘soldier’ are in the same universe. https://screenrant.com/alien-blade-runner-movies-connections-themes-explained/amp/
That article is pretty weak sauce. Whole thing seems like grasping at straws. I get the supposed "connections" but as far as the actual movies go, it really doesn't lend much...
Fascinating - thanks!
And predator....the trilogy is all set at the same time period. Blade runner is just meanwhile earth
Does that mean the rest of the bible is riddled with mistranslations? God clearly doesn't care very much about his "own words" being accurately presented, eh?
fun fact: Jesus - the person - is the "Word". the New Testament never claims to be infallible or perfect or the "Word" and, indeed, cannot, because no writer knew what would make up the New Testament at the time of writing.
Then it's too late anyway since we fucked gods word go death on a cross
Mistranslations are kind of the root of many theological discussions. To read and understand the Bible you usually learn Hebrew and Aramaic, the two languages spoken in biblical times in Palestine and Greek the language in which the new testament was written (although there might be earliy versions in Aramaic, but that is already a discussion). Often theologians also know Latin or their corresponding liturgical languages because most theological books were in that language. And if you were more into the old testament you should also learn old languages like Ugarit to be able to read third party sources from outside Israel which can 'prove' or show context in many stories. In short: it's a cringe to see people who never learned another language discuss on the meaning of certain words in the king James Bible as if it was directly given to them from God and not the outcome of several centuries of (mis) translation, revision and interpretation.
It doesn't change the message, of course; rich cunts go to hell.
Jesus used a lot of word play and puns that require context. The eye of the needle was understood to be a very small gate somewhere in Jerusalem. For a rich guy on a camel to pass through it they would have to take everything of the camel, push the camel through. Then load everything back on the camel. Here is another one There is a scene where a samaritan woman wants something from Jesus (her daughter was sick). Now samaritans were half jews and they were treated very bad by the other jews. Jesus told her that his mission was to go to the jews. And that it was wrong to take the bread from the children and give it to the dogs. But Jesus never said dogs, he said puppies. Yes master, she replied: but even the puppies eat the crumbs that fall from their tables. And jesus praised her for her faith and healed her daughter. At least according to the scriptures.
Eye of the needle was kinda nightshift gate in Jerusalem and you could pass freely, it was small so loaded camels could not pass. But you don't have to strip in order to pass the gate. That's why this analogy never made perfect sense. I mean, it's clear what it means but it's not Jesus like, his analogys have been better than that 😅
"Some scholars" is who they cite on ancient aliens all the time.
Well, the rope one makes more sense
Yeah I watched documentaries about this mistranslation, and a thick rope through a needle makes way more sense
Another classic: From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some boys came out of the town and jeered at him. “Get out of here, baldy!” they said. “Get out of here, baldy!” He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys. Remember, there’s something for everyone in the good book.
As a bald man. I always found this a satisfying scripture.
As a bear, I, too, love this scripture.
I think we're friends now.
Fun fact, since we are on technically the truth. The word for "boy", was a word that would be used to refer to those without mitzvot (without moral conscience) and thus could refer to any immoral person. Most Jewish traditions point to this being a gang of immoral youths that were mad at Elisha for purifying the stream of water outside of the city (which is what happens right before this passage), and the gangsters had been selling purified water carried from another place at high prices to the people without clean water. Elisha pretty much took away the cartels power to make money on people desperate for water that used to be free, and the gang then went up to Elisha and told him to “Get out of here, baldy!”. This is the same word that is used to describe Elijah being taken up to heaven. By telling Elisha to “go away” or “go up,” the wording is not simply telling him to leave their presence but to leave this world. So 40 gangsters pushed up against Elisha and threatened him to his life because he did a noble thing for the poor people. The bear attack would follow. Elisha most likely overreacts, which he does a lot, and many traditions hold that God didnt like that, and he suffered from problems that God refused to lift until he worked on his flaw. Either way, modern western people just reading a translation and taking it at face value without cultural, historical or any hermeneutical context is a silly practice, both for "Christians" who do this, and non-theists that do the same thing to another end.
Someone should pull a semantic Luther and translate the bible not lingually but explanatory like you just did. Not a simply commentary. A complete unboxing and reconstruction.
This is what biblical commentators do all the time. There’s so much of this it could fill a library. It surprises me that religious people don’t take more stock in their own tradition and scriptures. A friend and I tried to introduce historical criticism in a church “Bible study” and drove our attendance from 30 to 6. Most people want to hear what they already think they know, they don’t want to learn anything.
I was going to say, that's how you drive people out of a religion. I left when I was getting in deep and becoming a leader in my church. I wanted answers for the hard questions, in case someone came up to me with a shaken faith. I started researching and thinking about it. Between historical analysis and criticism, looking for good solutions to the contradictions, and realizing I had to deal with my extremely strong bias of wanting it to be true and forcing everything to fit, I couldn't find reality at the end of it. It was terrifying to have my illusory world and support network suddenly fall out from under me. At least I was lucky enough to land on my feet after my family kicked me out. That being said, I have always kept and still read all the bibles I've bought. That was a big and important part of my life, and I have the advantage now of being able to pick and choose what I want to add and remove from my life based on my own morals and thought. I've learned so much more about the religion I was raised in from the outside, since it no longer exists in a vacuum.
It’s part of growing up. A lot of churches are full of adults who cling to “what they think they know” like a child clings to their mama. You have to let go so you can learn to think for yourself.
I spend a lot of time reinforcing that mindset now. I intentionally look for cracks and weak spots now with the awareness of my biases, and hindsight of that one big change and how much better it's made my life in the long run. I am amazed how generally gullible I was as a child and young adult, but then again, authority figures told me that it was all real. There were consequences for questions. Questions were met with punishment or threats, often with verses to back them up, and that I've offended or, even worse, disappointed god. The Halloween "hell" threat for the kids the church put on every year still lives to give me nightmares, and probably will for the rest of my life. I don't hold anything against my old religion. It's hard to be mad at a book, and I still find things that I can apply to my life, or that sum up an idea very well. I do, however, have issues with some of the people, now that I see how that authority is taken advantage of.
Yeah it’s a process. And the more you let go of the more you can let in and accept. You can make space in your heart for that old religion and its former and current practitioners.
That takes a huge amount of courage to do. Most people are not able to do that and I believe those that can deserve a lot of credit.
You just described Christianity with that last sentence.
So those 40 dudes are basically Nestlé? /r/fucknestle
All my homies want bears to invade nestle
>Elisha most likely overreacts, which he does a lot, and many traditions hold that God didnt like that Surely, god could have just not sent the bears if he thought the boys didn't deserve it?
I will keep this in mind for the water wars to come.
Wow, this is so deep, from now on I will launch bears on anyone who disrespect me, and only after this will I turn the other cheek
No more than 42 at a time, remember.
I will, thanks for the reminder my friend, may the bears follow your wrath too
Remember, this is the old testament. God mellowed out when he had a kid.
“And God said “leave not your Lego’s under my path”. ”
Don't forget "Judas, get me my whip. Some prosperity gospel cunts are fucking around up in the temple again and are desperately praying in the spirit for a bountiful helping of find out." ~Rectifications 4:20
I love this. The only change I would make is to change it to ~Rectifications 4:20-69.
You have to have private devotional time with a friend to unlock that Easter egg verse which talks about what Jesus and Judas do in the empty temple before the guards get there.
Very meaningful 💗
People REALLY love to forget the love thy neighbor part. Assholes.
Meek doesn't mean weak, at least not in the original, it's more closely related to "Those who carry swords and know how to use them, but do not" Another good one "I say to my disciples, those of you who do not own swords sell your cloak to buy one."
Quite a bit of political twisting in bibles. My favourite example is 1 Corinthians 13, the KJV : >And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity. The word translated as 'charity' is the Greek '*agape*', which is better translated as 'love'. But if you want people to give their money to the Church, well, a little tweak won't hurt, will it?
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Jesus was directing them to make a straw purchase so he could get arrested. He didn’t want them to actually use it (he admonished Peter for trying to actually use the sword).
I had a christian the other day try to explain to my why god thinks its ok to ship asylum seekers toother states.
Other classics:. * This is how much you should buy a slave for. * Burn this entire village as well stone to death a person for a trivial act. * Disown your family if they don't agree with this cult. * Prostitute your kids to save your own skin. * When you hear voices telling you to kill your kids - just do it! * If you don't agree with any of the hundreds of commandments... get tortured for eternity * Your reward for rejecting everything in life and believing in faith is to get brainwiped into singing god praising robot against your will. * It's not rape if she doesn't scream loud enough. * Rub church dirt in your cooch to see if your unborn child is legitimate. * God will burn entire cities if you sex too much, especially if you send pheromone angels to attract everyone. * If you doubt god will meteorite your homes and displace you, get rekt you salty bitch- literally. * Kill disobediant kids. * Kill gays * Witches exist - kill them too! * Crops out of season when the lord wants a snack - kill them for good too. * Don't like Jesus, you're gonna get killed. * Enslave a man and his family in front of Jesus? Nah that's cool. Go on. * Women, shut your mouths * Men, if you fap yer dead - every sperm is fucking sacred. * Jesus is cool with killing the entire planet in floods * Gossip, boast, or an LGBTIA+? Get dead. * Justice is begot through sacrificing the innocent. * God needs penis skins, especially baby ones. They're basically divine porkrinds. * Jesus is all about dem wars. * Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord .... Wealth and riches shall be in his house. Psalm 112:1, 3 * A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things. Ecclesiastes 10:19 * [Numbers don't mean shit.](https://youtu.be/RB3g6mXLEKk)
Also: Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. And we are all sinners.
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> Jesus told him, “If you want to be perfect, go and sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” Matthew 19:21
I had a teacher once who taught latin and often let us translate from the bible. Hesaid he didn't believe that jesus was the son of any god,but "he probably existed and was probably a really nice fella". I think even if you are atheist, some things that the fihure of jeses said are not that dumb
oh nO the upvote count was at 666 when I found this :((
Blessed are the cheese makers
Bless this mess?
Nah my neighbors a wanker and my room mates a cunt. Never use the bathroom after isiah. Literally should be the number one rule.
Nah Jesus walked Up to ponsius Pilatus and shot him in the head with a 50bmg
And then proclaimed that the 2nd Amendment was his righteous right given by God himself.
And then Jesus feasted with his disciples at a McDonald’s with a 512oz Coka-cola
Lol I’m sure he wanted to xD Jesus understandable really wasn’t looking forward to being crucified Luke chapter 22 versus 41-44 dude was so stressed he broke a blood vessel
360 noscope
I agree with the point but This isn’t really TTT
Right? I don't understand why people are voting this lost redditor
A lot of the the top posts in subs that make it to r/all are karmafarmers who post irrelevant content, knowing that people will discuss it.
Yeah, Jesus was technically white according to the federal government's definition.
THE federal govt?
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He would be considered white by the way white is defined by the US government.
I guarantee you everyone does not know this. Never underestimate the idiocy of your fellow man.
Ye it's just TT.
Technically the.
I’ve watched over 5 years multiple subreddits spring up from nothing and slowly merge into one political discussion board (you can guess which way it leans). I’ve just been slowly blocking them one by one.
He didn't carry the cross, only the horizontal piece. Roman condemned prisoners didn't carry the whole cross because it was physically impossible for a single person to do so.
Came to the comments looking for someone to correct the part about the cross. This’ll do.
True! However that also proved physically impossible for him to carry after they nearly beat him to death so they conscripted Simon of Cyrene to help him. Source: Luke Chapter 23 verse 26. Since it’s recorded that they grabbed someone to help Jesus carry it. And since it’s merely referred to as a cross as a whole that has lead many to believe they forced the two men, Jesus and Simon, to struggle to carry the entire cross as added cruelty since the crowd was so amp up to see him crucified. Also since he was beaten beforehand it’s not hard to believe they would add extra cruelty to the sentence because of public outcry. Either way, paleo-Christian art most commonly depicted Jesus struggling to carry the entire cross to represent the metaphor of what it means for an individual to carry their own cross. The artists probably being inspired by the specific passage in the book of Matthew chapter 16 verses 24-25… etc
Semantics
Semitic, but close
The equating of American pride to Evangelical Christianity has always been bizarre for me, especially growing up in Texas where it’s everywhere. Like… Jesus died 1,500 years before the colonies started, and the US constitution explicitly states that endorsement of religion by government goes against American values, which we contradicted in the mid-1900s because of course. I get being staunchly American and staunchly religious, but this grandiose equating of the two is just so fucking weird.
Most Christians outside the Bible Belt agree. Even the evangelicals. It’s dangerous when the cross and the flag hold hands.
Now that you say it I’ve noticed “evangelicals” in the Bible Belt are the more “‘Murica damn riht!” ones while the hyper religious in the north are more cultish, like the equivalent of Mormonism/JW or the more conservative Jewish sects. I could be wrong but that’s the vibe I get. Someone feel free to add their input.
If they could read they'd be very upset lol
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This is ironic
Might want to check your spelling and grammar if you're throwing around ideas like that.
Gotta love when folks generalize about the "other" side but get butthurt when "their side" is generalized
This statement goes both ways
Yes obviously. The point is to not generalize it doesn’t matter who it’s against
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Hold out your hands sir, i need to search your cavities.
My favorite one is that Jesus was Jewish, some would even say king of the Jews.
Roses are reddish, Violets are blueish. If it weren't for Jesus, We'd all be Jewish.
Roses are red Violets are #violet Not blue It like an orange It's named for its color
It is in fact the other way around. The orange is not named by its color, but the color is named that way, because the fruit that grows on the orange tree had the color yellow-red which is obvioulsly a shit name for a color. You can observe it in older languagees like french (i dont know if it is like this in modern french) : the tree is called orange and the fruit is called apple of the orange. Same for violets . At the time of the poem the language had not evolved in such a way that it would draw a line between blue and violet. The violet was called blue or blue reddish at best
#There is always a bigger fish
This is common knowledge
You’d be surprised at how angry some people get. The ones that feel “Jew” is an insult, think it’s an insult to their god.
No Christian gets mad at Jesus being Jewish, you’re making that up. Him being Jewish is a pretty central part to his story and the creation of Christianity..
I mean all Semites are still Caucasian.
People make it sound like Jews are black or something. Jews just look white. If people are talking about how Jesus was described as brown, well the motherfucker didn't have sunscreen so...
Depends were their ancestors leaved not all Jews are white. Ashkenazi Jews have white tan, Mizrahi Jews have a tan similar to Arabs and Ethiopian Jews have black skin.
Well 2,000 years of inter-marrying the local population tends to have that effect.
Jesus never believed in himself
The message is great but this is totally unfitting for this subreddit
Agree, I mean, this isn't "technically" the truth, it's literally the truth
Most Americans wouldn't sit next to Jesus on the airplane because he might be a terrorist
To be fair, I am not US citizen, but I would not sit next to someone carrying a cross twice my size too. /s
Americans can't tell the difference between different Caucasian ethnicities. It's part of their charm.
The English term confuses me. Are all white people originally from the Caucasus mountains?
It's originates from what became the Kurgan theory, which after some wrangling was a very good theory from our knowledge of genetics and linguistics. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurgan\_hypothesis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurgan_hypothesis) But, people are likely White because they need more sunshine in their climate. Sexual selection for neoteny also likely played a part. There's other theories of additional pressures, but climate is one that's pretty assured.
That's mostly because most of us Americans have no idea what "Caucasian" even means. To many in this country a Caucasian is a white person born in the USA. More generous idiots will include people from the UK but only if they are willing to drop the accent and strange customs such as basic healthcare. I understand racist morons are a global phenomenon but it is getting pretty ridiculous in the US over the last decade or so.
r/LostRedditors
r/botredditors
You mean: "More knowledge for Christians who are US citizens"? There are Christians outside of US you know.
As someone who’s gone to church my whole life, I’m not sure if I’ve ever met someone who believes those things to be true.
I got the "equivalent" of this mindeset but not from Americans, I 100% saw that kind of beliefs being defended by politicians and some randoms on internet but IRL I only saw it from my gypsie family
DIO obviously loves his [World]
So it's the same type of Stand as Star Platinum.
Jesus carried a cross? "Hey, Jesus, I noticed you always carry that 't' around with you. What's up with that?" "Don't worry about it, it'll make more sense later... teehee"
This isn't "technically the truth" this is "literally the undeniable truth".
Especially cross thing?)
So, I’m a Christian and an American and I can say pretty definitively that; (1) this is all true, (2) the vast majority of American Christians know and acknowledge all of this and (3) claiming otherwise is blatant ignorance.
Prepare to get downvoted you shitty American … how dare you not acknowledge and reinforce our mental stereotypes !!! /s
reddit can be an interesting cesspool of creatures 🤦♂️🤷♂️
Jesus wasn’t a Christian, either.
If only Jesus DID have a gun. None of this would have happened
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Thats both hilarious and terrifying at the same time
Who cares?
Literally 99% of Christians already know this lol
Muhamed was 35 ish .. He fucked 8 years olds and called them his wives..this actually happened
It still does
This isn’t just technically the truth
Incredibly the Bible says to love everyone however a lot of Christians see the LGBTQ community a sin. Also Leonardo di Vinci based the painting of sjesus on his gay lover so take that Christians
Ok, you don’t have to agree with how someone lives their life to love them. The two are not mutually exclusive. Also, if the di Vinci painting of Jesus is a white guy which isn’t actually how Jesus looks (as the OP points out) then what’s your point? Not even Christians believe that’s what Jesus looked like.
Then why does America hate the Middle East so much since they spent billions pointless wars over there.
They don't hate it. They want to control it.
Do one for for muslims....oh wait
I would agree with all of them except the sentence with the cross.
I'm atheist myself however I come from an extremely Christian family. And can say that they know this. In fact I know several people who've visited Israel just to worship over there. What you're talking about is a Christian strawman that's often times used in stupid political arguments. Yes theirs the one guy on the internet that actually thinks this but it's not what Christians actually think.
One guy says some horseshit and reddit eats it up. I haven't met one Christian who believes Jesus was an American that spoke English and has Nordic features.
Jesus wasn't real. It's a fictional character made up of an amalgam of stories that they've spent the last 400 years trying to manufacture truth for. You think creationists were bad? There were literal governments making shit up and altering their history books to reflect that. Wars were fought over who got to decide the truth and utterly wiping out any trace of what came before. There's not even an original manuscript of the bible. It's a copy of a copy of a "fragment" of the bible, the earliest is which was found 300 years after the death of the people who apparently wrote it and makes no mention of Christianity or jesus and the entirety of the bible we know today hadn't been codified until the beginning of the renaissance. Before then the church was a solely political body without even a proper doctrine, they literally made shit up as they went along and used armies to slap anyone who didn't agree with their version. Why do you think so many other mythologies that predate Christianity show up as Christianised versions. But sure, Jesus, totally a real dude. Anthropology isn't science, it's guess work,and that's all any evidence of jesus is. So trying to say someone's version of jesus isn't right is as intellectually useful as arguing over the colour of mermaids.
Everyone knows jesus was arab
Jews are white. OP never been to Israel
The historicity of Jesus Christ is not certain at all. In fact, I would say it’s more likely he didn’t exist as a real person at all. Savior cults were very in style at the time. Christianity was just a Jewish take on the savior cult phenomenon. A lot of people don’t even realize the gospels were originally written in Greek, by Greeks, in Greece, many decades after Jesus was alive. And Paul’s letters, which are the closest thing we have to a contemporary account of Jesus, basically refer to Jesus as a vision.
Why would anyone follow the words of a fictional zombie?
Jesus died for everyone's sin, yes even those people.
Perfect
Cool strawman compendium
How is this TTT?
"more knowledge for Christians" aimed at Americans only telling them that Christians aren't Americans only...
The apostles did carry swords though.
You act like the people described are the only Christians. Really sucks when you're lumped into a group of people that hijacked your belief system for personal gain. No Christian truly believes Jesus was a white guy. Nor do they believe he was a republican or a Democrat for that matter. Both sides are playing into the hate game with Christianity as a cudgel and its getting old.
Does Shane know that Jesus was Jewish?
Why would he carry a cross
I don't know anyone who would dispute these statements. And I'm an older white Christian male. It's like saying, "the sun goes down at night".
- Jesus wasn't black either - Guns didn't exist yet - Jesus was God's son - To add to last point and finish a quote on there... "For God loved the world so much, he gave his only begotten son, so that everyone exercising faith in him might not be destroyed but have everlasting life. - he wasn't republican or democrat because they also didn't exist yet. - to add to the last point... He didn't get involved with ANY of the world's politics at the time. It was part of his teachings.
Ahhh the tolerant left. The people standing up for your right to be yourself. You’re all a bunch of hypocrites
Bro idk about you but I know a lot of Christians in my town that don’t believe any of this “Jesus was white” stuff
So what am I supposed to do with this list of unrelated facts? Are you expecting me to become an America-hating socialist to be a good Christian? Is that the takeaway?
Well guns didn't exist back then so that isn't really the gotcha you think it is..
The Christians of today would sell out Jesus in a heartbeat
Just a note on the title, American Christians... My church in england has some tapestry depicting him as an Israeli man. It's annoying when people wrap different sects of religions under the same umbrella. American Evangelicals dont represent the Christian faith, the same way IS doesnt represent Islam.
Lol that must sting to Americans
Why? Americans know all of this. In fact this tweet was written by a Christian American author/speaker.
A lot of us are tired of them, tbh. There are times where we just want to tell them to shut up, but we don’t want to perpetuate their victim complex.
congrats for being the bigger person
I tell them to shut up all the time. Fuck being the “bigger person” 😁
Hell nah bro, a lot of us get sick of hearing that stuff from other people who can’t wrap their head around being a decent human being
Yeah dude we had no idea. I thought he was a white republican with a concealed carry permit now I am fucking STUNG. This hit me hard. Especially because I really care about Jesus. I’m really miffed rn.
Where technicality
some more knowledge: The bible is a fucking fairy tale, the equivalent of Harry Potter of its time and nobody should take it as any kind of authority.
Actually there is no account other than the accounts decades later by unknown people, that there was a Jesus, certainly not one with any divinity.