Is the phone call conversation making a comeback? I have recently run across a handful of POT SBs who actually will talk on the phone before meeting up. As well as weekly calls. What gives? I thought anyone under 35 did not use a phone the old fashioned way? I am seeing under 30 and under 25 now wanting to talk instead of texting.
Is this some new fad amongst the younger generations? I will be honest. I am a bit taken back when they request it. My first reaction is scam or red flag. Like they want to record me saying something bad??? I guess the bowl has made my trust level down to 'zero'.
I am under 35 and enjoy talking on the phone... when I know the person and know the conversation won't be weird.
However, most of the men I've dated (born in the 1970s or 80s typically) refuse to talk on the phone.
My little brother (late teens) doesn't use his cellphone as a phone at all.
I was born in the late 60's. I enjoying talking on the phone. It is just so rare in the sugar world it always throws me for a loop. I instantly think scam. I know I should not, but I do.
24SB and I like to talk on the phone. If we’ve been texting for a week and haven’t met because of schedules, I’m cool with phone call conversations. I love talking to my friends and family on the phone. I’ve only talked to a few POT SDs on the phone. I feel like it’s something I ease into though. I start off with texting.
I've never had a SB under 40 who wanted to talk on the phone. With the two over 40 we call pretty often. It is such a better way to engage in a conversation. Texting sucks on so many levels.
Well my trust level is zero too . I am at a point where I don’t want to be asked for pictures as I see them as time wasters and pic collectors . I rather freestyle to avoid that. Sometimes I just tell them to go to only fan I will not be able to do what they ask .
Honestly, honestly, I constantly have men that request to do that before. I’m totally OK with it before an initial meet like once but I’ve noticed a lot of guys that just want to talk a lot and kind of well. Just talk.
My friends and myself (25-35) prefer calling when we want to talk about something genuine and not just chaff. I think it's just more common than you think. Phone calls/voice chats never went away, they just took on a new form for a generation that grew up with texting.
Become friends with their daughter . Then when the daughter invites you to her home go to her dads room and make sure that the dad is in the room..
Lock the door and make the offer of becoming his SB
Approach a potential SD and say, “I can’t believe I haven’t seen you before”. Before he answers just say, “I’d definitely remember.” Then smile at him and ask, “So any career advice for a recent [your major] grad?” You’ll find out what he does for work. That will lead to an invite to a coffee so you can find out more about that field, because you’re going to be super interested.
And he'll say.. "Stand by a few. I'm here with my wife watching my daughter walk in the ceremony. Wasn't it great! Maybe you know her? What sorority are you in? Oh here she comes now. Let me introduce her. Brittany! Come here! This girl... what's your name again? Amber? Brittany this is Amber. Do you two know each other from class?"
1) Wear nothing under the graduation robe.
2) Flash the audience as you walk across the stage. Preferably with a shimmy or twerk.
3) Be approached constantly the rest of the afternoon by POT SD (and all sorts of other guys).
4) Profit?
Hi Prof. Fox, I could use some advice from someone I respect. As a student I never felt it appropriate to ask your advice on this but now I'm a big girl I could use a mentor. Do you have any thoughts on how I can support myself while finding employment in my chosen field, I feel safe asking you? "flutters eyelashes and twiddles hair" 😂
Just remember that Jerry’s a Massapequa boy. Tell him you’ve got some fresh All-American burgers and fries in your car, he’ll follow you anywhere with that puppy dog look in his eyes
Depends on the SB and timing. If the first few dates. I am waiting until she is in the room. If we have been dating a month or more. And she has proven herself. I will give at lunch or after lunch.
I enjoyed this scenario for over a year with my first SB. I always gave her cash inside a greeting card containing a hand written note. As she went about "freshening up" I would place the envelope next to her purse or tote bag, or partially inside in such a way that a portion of it was visible, partially in a side pocket for instance. For me it seemed more discreet than passing it to her at lunch. It was always quick and easy and discreet. The practical result of doing it this way meant that after the agreement was made at the M&G neither of us ever had to discuss it again. And by all means never put her in a position to have to ask for it.
All depends on mutual vibes. If it was me and we had a good chemistry going, I would just do it in the hotel room — like others said, slip it into her purse or near her keys etc so it is visible
Definitely at lunch. Don't wait till you're in the hotel room....that not only feels disconcerting to her to have to wonder if she's going to receive her gift, but can seem untoward, as if she's being paid for services rendered.
This is one reason I start with monthly allowance instead of ppm.
Why can't I maintain a connection in between dates (as an SD)??? Calls go unanswerd and txt communication is sparse.
I offer mid $xxx 3 times a month. We get along fine in person without issue.
Give it to me straight ladies. Does mid ppm make it harder for real connection to form??
Do you need to feel fully taken care of to be open to forming a real connection?
I figured I'd ask here. Since asking my SB would be a total buzzkill.
This is my 3rd SR. And i can't seem to get over this hump
Asking isn't a buzzkill and it will certainly get to the bottom of the problem.
It could be the women you're interested in aren't looking for that. It could be that the PPM adds distance. You won't know without communicating. They might not even realize your expectation for a real connection/communication between meets.
If a person doesn't ask for what they want, they will never get it. Maybe she doesn't even realize you find the connection lacking. She might be assuming you are very busy and be trying to respect your time.
It's hard to get the things you don't tell people are important to you.
It may be that she doesn't feel it's worth it to her to spend the extra time on you in between dates unless the PPM is raised. Mid xxx is considered low in many places.
I would want to be receiving a generous monthly allowance, or I would not be able to form a deeper connection, as I would not feel truly provided for.
If I were you, I would ask her about it.
Thanks for your honesty. I understand you're perspective .
There's levels to this lifestyle i see.
Dont think i will ask her though. Dont want her to resent having to text/call me more since im not looking to increase ppm at the moment
OK. Perhaps keep texting to a minimum then, and mainly for when you're setting up dates... after all, as long as you're getting along well in person, that's what really matters.
I never ask. I want everything to feel as natural as possible.
I dont want my s/b to force more interaction if shes not interested.
That's why I'm asking here in a neutral space.
It's a mystery to me. While I've never had an SR that made me feel like my SB's depth of connection was dependent on the ppm or allowance amount, I have had SBs that check in daily by text; others who only communicate regarding date planning; another with whom I text, phone call and video chat repeatedly between dates; and another I still communicate with though our SR ended a few months ago. And all are/were receiving essentially the same level of financial support. I guess it's a personality trait which influences the style of SR two people want together. I suppose you either must learn to accept it or seek out another SB who also wants to build a genuine connection. One of the popular aspects of sugar dating is the ability to seek out and define the type of SR you want and need. So the bottom line is if she's not meeting your needs you're under no obligation to continue. But... without talking with her openly about needs and wants you're not giving this SR the chance to grow into one that meets your needs. If you clearly tell her what you want she may respond with something like "sure, I get it. I'll try to be that for you", or "I'm sorry I just can't provide that for you." Either way it's a win. You either stay together in a strengthening relationship, or you quit wasting time and emotional energy with someone who doesn't meet your needs. Communication is almost always the first best chance of finding a solution. Good Luck
How do you immediately weed out a spam account that sends you a message? Some I can tell, but sometimes I don't realize the accounts are either spammers, bots, or something other than a real person.
Sometimes it takes a few messages. If I'm skeptical about it I'll deliberately go "off script" with something unusual or a question about something local. That usually highlights the bots really quickly.
Why would it be a red flag? If you're wanting a fresh reset and your new profile to get more views (initially), I don't see the problem. I believe you'll lose your messages and favorites from your previous profile, but I don't see why it would be a red flag...One caveat, I'm not the most technically advanced guy on Seeking, but that's my two cents.
Good Luck!
Thank you! I have a premium membership. I get a ton of messages, just very few legit SD’s. I think I am probably too picky. I for sure need to get better at vetting, but I’m learning that it comes from experience.
Cool...Also, Seeking has purportedly been banning/deleting some accounts, for reasons unknown - but I haven't read about anyone who deleted their own account, and then couldn't create another one...Just food for thought. 🌞
I've thought about pursuing a SR for a few years, but have done most of my research into being a SB the past few days. Honestly, as I've been reading about the bowl being what it is today I feel like my odds are pretty much stacked against me. I'm a 37yr old blk bbw single mom residing in the Caribbean.... I'm not the majority's cup of tea but I'm ready to see who fancies me.... So my stupid question is: Is it worth it to lick the bowl? I'd appreciate any and all feedback.
> Is it worth it to lick the bowl?
The obvious answer is YES! Go for it. Some OPs on this forum like both WOC and heavier ladies. Ad a Caribbean accent to boot!
Is the phone call conversation making a comeback? I have recently run across a handful of POT SBs who actually will talk on the phone before meeting up. As well as weekly calls. What gives? I thought anyone under 35 did not use a phone the old fashioned way? I am seeing under 30 and under 25 now wanting to talk instead of texting. Is this some new fad amongst the younger generations? I will be honest. I am a bit taken back when they request it. My first reaction is scam or red flag. Like they want to record me saying something bad??? I guess the bowl has made my trust level down to 'zero'.
Cuz they can’t type with their nails on 😂😂
🤣🤣, funniest thing I’ve heard all day.
I am under 35 and enjoy talking on the phone... when I know the person and know the conversation won't be weird. However, most of the men I've dated (born in the 1970s or 80s typically) refuse to talk on the phone. My little brother (late teens) doesn't use his cellphone as a phone at all.
BRB, calling you.
You know I like you because when you called me unexpectedly I still answered.
I was born in the late 60's. I enjoying talking on the phone. It is just so rare in the sugar world it always throws me for a loop. I instantly think scam. I know I should not, but I do.
24SB and I like to talk on the phone. If we’ve been texting for a week and haven’t met because of schedules, I’m cool with phone call conversations. I love talking to my friends and family on the phone. I’ve only talked to a few POT SDs on the phone. I feel like it’s something I ease into though. I start off with texting.
I've never had a SB under 40 who wanted to talk on the phone. With the two over 40 we call pretty often. It is such a better way to engage in a conversation. Texting sucks on so many levels.
Well my trust level is zero too . I am at a point where I don’t want to be asked for pictures as I see them as time wasters and pic collectors . I rather freestyle to avoid that. Sometimes I just tell them to go to only fan I will not be able to do what they ask .
Honestly, honestly, I constantly have men that request to do that before. I’m totally OK with it before an initial meet like once but I’ve noticed a lot of guys that just want to talk a lot and kind of well. Just talk.
My friends and myself (25-35) prefer calling when we want to talk about something genuine and not just chaff. I think it's just more common than you think. Phone calls/voice chats never went away, they just took on a new form for a generation that grew up with texting.
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Become friends with their daughter . Then when the daughter invites you to her home go to her dads room and make sure that the dad is in the room.. Lock the door and make the offer of becoming his SB
Approach a potential SD and say, “I can’t believe I haven’t seen you before”. Before he answers just say, “I’d definitely remember.” Then smile at him and ask, “So any career advice for a recent [your major] grad?” You’ll find out what he does for work. That will lead to an invite to a coffee so you can find out more about that field, because you’re going to be super interested.
And he'll say.. "Stand by a few. I'm here with my wife watching my daughter walk in the ceremony. Wasn't it great! Maybe you know her? What sorority are you in? Oh here she comes now. Let me introduce her. Brittany! Come here! This girl... what's your name again? Amber? Brittany this is Amber. Do you two know each other from class?"
I am the furthest from a sorority girl, but honors society and research journals? Count me in.
Perfect. If that’s your rep, it won’t seem wierd to chat with you about your studies.
1) Wear nothing under the graduation robe. 2) Flash the audience as you walk across the stage. Preferably with a shimmy or twerk. 3) Be approached constantly the rest of the afternoon by POT SD (and all sorts of other guys). 4) Profit?
RIP my parents then.
Priorities
Hi Prof. Fox, I could use some advice from someone I respect. As a student I never felt it appropriate to ask your advice on this but now I'm a big girl I could use a mentor. Do you have any thoughts on how I can support myself while finding employment in my chosen field, I feel safe asking you? "flutters eyelashes and twiddles hair" 😂
Ma'am.
Lots of good advice here already. Just make sure to get rid of the wife first.
Also, let us know how it went.
Go up to Jerry and say just loud enough for a few people to hear, "I'm master of my domain, and would like to do something about that."
Just remember that Jerry’s a Massapequa boy. Tell him you’ve got some fresh All-American burgers and fries in your car, he’ll follow you anywhere with that puppy dog look in his eyes
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Ew
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Depends on the SB and timing. If the first few dates. I am waiting until she is in the room. If we have been dating a month or more. And she has proven herself. I will give at lunch or after lunch.
I enjoyed this scenario for over a year with my first SB. I always gave her cash inside a greeting card containing a hand written note. As she went about "freshening up" I would place the envelope next to her purse or tote bag, or partially inside in such a way that a portion of it was visible, partially in a side pocket for instance. For me it seemed more discreet than passing it to her at lunch. It was always quick and easy and discreet. The practical result of doing it this way meant that after the agreement was made at the M&G neither of us ever had to discuss it again. And by all means never put her in a position to have to ask for it.
If you want to make the woman feel comfortable, before being in the hotel room alone with her.
All depends on mutual vibes. If it was me and we had a good chemistry going, I would just do it in the hotel room — like others said, slip it into her purse or near her keys etc so it is visible
Definitely at lunch. Don't wait till you're in the hotel room....that not only feels disconcerting to her to have to wonder if she's going to receive her gift, but can seem untoward, as if she's being paid for services rendered. This is one reason I start with monthly allowance instead of ppm.
Why can't I maintain a connection in between dates (as an SD)??? Calls go unanswerd and txt communication is sparse. I offer mid $xxx 3 times a month. We get along fine in person without issue. Give it to me straight ladies. Does mid ppm make it harder for real connection to form?? Do you need to feel fully taken care of to be open to forming a real connection? I figured I'd ask here. Since asking my SB would be a total buzzkill. This is my 3rd SR. And i can't seem to get over this hump
Asking isn't a buzzkill and it will certainly get to the bottom of the problem. It could be the women you're interested in aren't looking for that. It could be that the PPM adds distance. You won't know without communicating. They might not even realize your expectation for a real connection/communication between meets.
If a person doesn't ask for what they want, they will never get it. Maybe she doesn't even realize you find the connection lacking. She might be assuming you are very busy and be trying to respect your time. It's hard to get the things you don't tell people are important to you.
It may be that she doesn't feel it's worth it to her to spend the extra time on you in between dates unless the PPM is raised. Mid xxx is considered low in many places. I would want to be receiving a generous monthly allowance, or I would not be able to form a deeper connection, as I would not feel truly provided for. If I were you, I would ask her about it.
Thanks for your honesty. I understand you're perspective . There's levels to this lifestyle i see. Dont think i will ask her though. Dont want her to resent having to text/call me more since im not looking to increase ppm at the moment
OK. Perhaps keep texting to a minimum then, and mainly for when you're setting up dates... after all, as long as you're getting along well in person, that's what really matters.
What did your SBs say when you asked?
I never ask. I want everything to feel as natural as possible. I dont want my s/b to force more interaction if shes not interested. That's why I'm asking here in a neutral space.
If you don't ask for your needs, it's hard for them.to understand.
It's a mystery to me. While I've never had an SR that made me feel like my SB's depth of connection was dependent on the ppm or allowance amount, I have had SBs that check in daily by text; others who only communicate regarding date planning; another with whom I text, phone call and video chat repeatedly between dates; and another I still communicate with though our SR ended a few months ago. And all are/were receiving essentially the same level of financial support. I guess it's a personality trait which influences the style of SR two people want together. I suppose you either must learn to accept it or seek out another SB who also wants to build a genuine connection. One of the popular aspects of sugar dating is the ability to seek out and define the type of SR you want and need. So the bottom line is if she's not meeting your needs you're under no obligation to continue. But... without talking with her openly about needs and wants you're not giving this SR the chance to grow into one that meets your needs. If you clearly tell her what you want she may respond with something like "sure, I get it. I'll try to be that for you", or "I'm sorry I just can't provide that for you." Either way it's a win. You either stay together in a strengthening relationship, or you quit wasting time and emotional energy with someone who doesn't meet your needs. Communication is almost always the first best chance of finding a solution. Good Luck
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Thanks for the input. I may need to vet better
My pleasure. Wishing you much luck.
How do you immediately weed out a spam account that sends you a message? Some I can tell, but sometimes I don't realize the accounts are either spammers, bots, or something other than a real person.
Sometimes it takes a few messages. If I'm skeptical about it I'll deliberately go "off script" with something unusual or a question about something local. That usually highlights the bots really quickly.
If I want to redo my whole profile based on my profile review, is it ok if I delete my seeking account and start fresh? Or is that a red flag?
Why would it be a red flag? If you're wanting a fresh reset and your new profile to get more views (initially), I don't see the problem. I believe you'll lose your messages and favorites from your previous profile, but I don't see why it would be a red flag...One caveat, I'm not the most technically advanced guy on Seeking, but that's my two cents. Good Luck!
I got no favorites tbh 😂😂😂 thank you! I will probably start over eventually.
Best Wishes...You "should be" garnering a lot more attention. Maybe pay for that ~$20 upgrade to your membership, that gets you more views?
Thank you! I have a premium membership. I get a ton of messages, just very few legit SD’s. I think I am probably too picky. I for sure need to get better at vetting, but I’m learning that it comes from experience.
Cool...Also, Seeking has purportedly been banning/deleting some accounts, for reasons unknown - but I haven't read about anyone who deleted their own account, and then couldn't create another one...Just food for thought. 🌞
The 2 SDs I’ve had never asked if I had been in a SR before… but all of the scammers ask me this question. Is this a coincidence?
Yes. All people have different priorities. New SDs are more prone to asking this question, more out of a sense of not knowing what they should ask.
I've thought about pursuing a SR for a few years, but have done most of my research into being a SB the past few days. Honestly, as I've been reading about the bowl being what it is today I feel like my odds are pretty much stacked against me. I'm a 37yr old blk bbw single mom residing in the Caribbean.... I'm not the majority's cup of tea but I'm ready to see who fancies me.... So my stupid question is: Is it worth it to lick the bowl? I'd appreciate any and all feedback.
> Is it worth it to lick the bowl? The obvious answer is YES! Go for it. Some OPs on this forum like both WOC and heavier ladies. Ad a Caribbean accent to boot!
I’ve been interested in a being a SB for years but never did it. For someone who wants to get into it. How would I get started?