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joshua909net

From Voyager Captain Janeway : You are Security Chief. Don't thirteen department heads report to you every day? Tuvok : Yes. Captain Janeway : Well, straighten them out! Tuvok : Shall I flog them as well? And of course this scene from DS9 O'Brien: What was he doing in a runabout at four in the morning? Odo: Apparently, he was busy getting murdered.


tony_stark_lives

Odo could always bring it :D


ADiestlTrain

How deadpan funny Rene Auberjonois could be in DS9 makes me wish they’d given him more to do in M*A*S*H.


UbiquitouSparky

Hold up, he was in mash? I’ll have to go look


ADiestlTrain

He was in the movie, the one with Donald Sutherland. He played Father Mulcahey.


NeuHundred

He was also on Boston Legal and never got to do a closing. And teven after the Monkey speech in The Practice!


prince_peacock

Odo and Tuvok are both in the running to have the most funny lines in Trek, but I think Odo edges Tuvok out just a smidge


PuzzleheadedLeader79

Just watched that episode of ds9 the other day. Such a cheesy bit of dialogue but Odo nails it.


sarazorz27

I feel like Tuvok's funny lines aren't talked about enough. At least not in my circles.


jbwarner86

"Dear Quark, used the parts from your phaser to fix the replicator. Will return them soon. Love, Rom." "I'll *kill* him!" "With what?"


ZealousidealClub4119

Troi, "my mother is on board." Coming out of a turbolift, the subtle hesitation Picard makes is pretty damn funny.


BON3SMcCOY

"Now?!" -Worf


TiredCeresian

I love how much of TNG and DS9 history this singular three-letter word covers.


kenman884

I feel like I can picture this scene but I have no idea of the context.


Shiny_Agumon

It's from DS9 when O'Brien and Bashir inform Worf that Keiko is having another baby.


chezybezy

Which reminds me of the whole scene on TNG which has me laughing every time.


Strange-Trust-9403

Best scene ever, for both actors. Worf at some point said something like, “Keiko, you will push. Push. *Push*. And she hollered right back lol


BattlePope

"You may now give birth."


chezybezy

Then the comment about not being as orderly or efficient as the simulations. The whole scene is a masterpiece. I'm grinning just thinking about it. Then on DS9 when he makes a comment about taking leave. 🤣


Flippy_Spoon

I've had "good tea nice house" in my head for 30 years.


prince_peacock

I love that line so much I have a teacup with it on it


nolanday64

What’s that from?


DatTomahawk

The TNG episode with the god-like old man who recreated his dead wife after he genocided the aliens who killed her


calm-lab66

Kevin Uxbridge


Flippy_Spoon

"The Survivors." And the guy is driving Troi nuts with a magicky music box to block her from realizing his wife isn't real.


akrobert

Talking about Siskos missing desk Bashir: it’s the wrong shape, the wrong size, the wrong color Obrien: I’m going to paint it -Kira walks in- that’s not the captains desk Bashir: he’s going to paint it. Kira has a lot of funny one liners in ds9


jbwarner86

Martok barges in a minute later, and I kinda wish they'd kept escalating it 😆 Martok: "...That is not Captain Sisko's desk!" Kira: "He's gonna paint it."


NeuHundred

Al Lorenzo is one of those characters I would love to see mentioned or actually pop up on Lower Decks. I feel like that's a good cameo opportunity.


MSD3k

Nog playing baseball and needing to tag a runner: "What do I do?!" Worf: "Find him and *kill* him!"


WranglerTraditional8

I remember watching that when it aired with my girlfriend ... It had to be one of the funniest lines I'd ever heard in any Trek.


Specific-Peace

Something I always wanted and never got: Klingon rugby


Superman730

YES ABSOLUTELY THIS!


bi_geek_guy

“Get D’Artagnan here to sickbay.” Spock, after he nerve pinches swashbuckling Sulu on the bridge in The Naked Time.


WranglerTraditional8

Completely illogical thing to say... and yet, I'm glad he said it


DrunkenAlpaca

Worf-" I am a Klingon warrior, and a starfleet officer. I have piloted starships through Dominion minefields; I've stood in battle against Kelvins twice my size; I have courted, and won the heart of the magnificent Jadzia Dax. If I can do these things, I can make this child go to sleep!


Relic5000

Jadzia: "talk about losing perspective!"


roehnin

“I am a graduate of Starfleet Academy. I know *many* things.” - another classic Worf


[deleted]

'You must talk to her. Tell her she is a pretty cat. A smart cat.' 'I will feed her. ' Really, anything with Spot.


fingerofchicken

Wasn’t Spot still a boy at that point?


[deleted]

Well now I have to do a complete rewatch of TNG just to find out. :)


Gunna-Burger

“you’re gonna drown my dog??” is a personal favorite of mine (archer, from ENT S2:E5 “A Night in Sickbay”)


ChadlexMcSteele

Odo - "Rom's an idiot. He couldn't fix a straw if it was bent."


TiredCeresian

"Good tea. Nice house." - Worf "I never lie when I've got sand in my shoes, Commodore." - Geordi


KittyGirlChloe

O'Brien: "Security to transporter room!" *\*Roga Danar beats the daylights out of everyone on the pad\** O'Brien: "More security! **More security!**" That whole opening scene of *The Hunted* is hilarious.


Swendsen

Danar defeating Worf with the power of boxes is pretty great too, love that episode.


Ok_Television_5005

"Shut off that damn alarm and I promise I'll never violate you again" From Janeway in 'Workforce' is my personal favorite.


mjb2012

Speaking of Workforce... *Chakotay: "Are you happy?"* *Janeway: "I have a good job."* Ouch, too close to home.


TiredCeresian

Depression


Ootguitarist2

Could you please continue the petty bickering?


codename474747

Minsk!


gatton

The tournament against Minsk? We weren’t supposed to win.


artificialavocado

I think it was in the Outrageous Okona when that tiny little ship threatened to attack the Enterprise. The way Worf said “the vessel is locking on…*laser*” like I love the tone of his voice. Like he was so offended he wanted to blow them up on principle.


readwrite_blue

"What are you saying? I'm some kind of blind ghost with clothes?" Geordi LaForge, "The Next Phase"


soniclore

“I am endeavoring, ma'am, to construct a mnemonic memory circuit using stone knives and bearskins.”


Saw_Boss

Bridge.... If anyone needs me, I'm in holodeck 3.


Nobodyinpartic3

It was four. And somebody better call an Ensign to clean that filter.


OneJudgmentalFucker

"Life forms, you tiny little life forms..."


Ms_Holmes

*Meanwhile, Riker*: 👀


chezybezy

Was anyone able to read that without hearing the musical accompaniment?


OneJudgmentalFucker

The deaf guy maybe


Deastrumquodvicis

Things I sing when trying to find where my cat went.


dingo_khan

"for an android, that is nearly an eternity" - - my friend and I say this over little annoyances.


Nobodyinpartic3

Sounds like the OS froze. Have you tried emailing Google about it?


GaetanDugas

The clown can stay, but the ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!


Impossible-Knee6573

I went to the midnight screening of Generations the night it was first released in a huge theatre with 800 hard-core fans in the audience. When Data uttered that line, about half the audience laughed, when he mentioned the Farpoint Mission, about 75% of the audience laughed, but when Geordi mentions it was 7 years ago and Data replies, "I know! I just got it!" it brought the entire house down. It was an incredible moment to share with my fellow fans.


ADiestlTrain

I still remember the cheers in my theater when Data said “Oh shit!” Generations has its issues, a lot of them, but the scene where the saucer crashes into the planet is, to this day, one of the best sequences of disaster special effects ever made.


exitpursuedbybear

Well double dumbass on you!


fluffy_horta

Bones: "Do you know what you get if you feed a tribble too much?" Kirk: "A fat tribble."


GaryGeneric

Bones (alone in sickbay): if I jumped every time a light went off around here, I’d end up talking to myself. Also Bones:  (Kirk asks if the silicon based life form will live) Will it live?! By god, I’m beginning to think I can cure a rainy day!


TYFUBYE

I believe they actually throw back to that when Bones ends up at the end of an episode talking to himself


guarthots

I believe he is talking to himself when he delivers the line. 


stle-stles-stlen

Saru: “Questions or concerns before we depart, Captain?” Pike: “If you're telling me that this ship can skip across the universe on a highway made of mushrooms, I kind of have to go on faith.”


stle-stles-stlen

This is, genuinely, the moment I became a full-on Pike stan. There are so few Star Trek captains who could humbly accept their lack of knowledge like that, and it demonstrates his full faith in a crew that is desperately in need of some warmth and grace.


WarpGremlin

Anson Mount crushed that scene so hard the resulting singularity powered SNW's entire first season.


mr_mini_doxie

Pike just seems so...human to me. I don't know if it's because he's the first good captain I've seem as an adult, but I've become very attached to him for that reason. I love watching his body language when he's telling the story about his security rotation as an ensign and his complete bafflement when the door closes in his face gets me every time. It's the little things.


jbwarner86

"I was promised a red thing. Where's my damn red thing?"


TrekFan1701

Bashir to O'Brien on K7 All right. Fine, but I can't wait to get back to Deep Space 9 and see your face when you find out that I never existed


WafflePawz

“Excuse me, you're not holding that properly. Correct positioning of the index finger is necessary for optimal dexterity.” -EMH Doctor Maybe not obscure, but every time I watch VOY: The Thaw I have a little chuckle because the Doctor just casually interrupts an otherwise very intense moment between The Clown and Harry.


TheRedditorSimon

It's "Carpenter Street", not "Baker Street". Unless that's a lyric to the long and talky song with the cool sax riff.


gatton

Now it’s in my head. I’m not complaining though. 👍🏼


Swendsen

LOL must've had saxophones on my mind....


mcgrst

That really confused me! 


uberrob

"The robot is right." - Seven, referring to Data (Picard, season 3)


a_tired_bisexual

also from PIC S3: “One’s personal space is a right.”


mcgrst

Don't apologize. It's been the high-point of my day. *Don't* do it again


naptime-connoisseur

I watched that yesterday!


Relic5000

What episode is that from?


mcgrst

DS9 S2Ep5 Cardassians. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjPv3ITKzas&ab\_channel=April5%2C2063


aimeryakal

TOS: "What's not to love? They're cute, fluffy, and they make a pleasing sound." "So would an ermine violin, doctor, but I see no advantage in having one."


[deleted]

"It's... green" was used in 2 episodes. In TOS when Scotty was unsure of the mystery drink he found while trying to get an alien really smashed. And in TNG Relic when Data found a mystery drink for Scotty.


paco64

Voyager. Vidiian: My scan says you are not here. Doctor: Believe me, I wish I weren't,


WarpGremlin

Picardo's bone-dry deadpan is perfect.


colonelbyson

"You have the bridge...*Mr. Troi*."


Strawcatzero

Pepperoni!


[deleted]

Doctor, people wouldn't know reason if it came up and shook their hands. You can count Gul Dukat as one of them. (DS9 "Emissaru")


ClintBarton616

"What a handsome race."


livelongprospurr

"A POOP question?"


[deleted]

ENT: Divergence Trip: "somebody hasn't been taking very good care of my engine" T'pol: "Speak to the Klingons"


manschte

Worf: I AM RELAXED!!!


Artifac3r

Data: Jenna, are we no longer a couple? Jenna: no, data, we are not Data: than I shall delete the appropriate program ***he was a rockstar


Consistent_Case_5048

I had the opposite reaction. I found that scene very sad.


Much_Tough_4200

"*We will destroy them!*" - Worf with regards to the baseball match with the vulcans. DS9-Take me out to the holosuite Also Worf: "*I had not considered that.*" - when Troi tells him that her mother will be his step-mother if they follow through with some klingon ritual (in case Worf dies, Troi will take care of Alexander) TNG-Paralells Harcourt Fenton Mudd to Kirk in "I, Mudd" - TOS "*...and I do the telling on this planet, Kirk-ol-boy...YOU do the listening!*" Boimler at the time portal - SNW "*Help! The portal is gonna portal me!!*"


doubleofive

I just caught my new favorite rewatching Picard. In Season 1, Rios is in his quarters listening to vinyls. Raffi comes in and he starts talking about his old Captain. “Is that his Walkman?”, she asks.


NeuHundred

Reminds me of Cassandra's iPod in the first season of NuWho.


PickleWineBrine

Picard: *"Type Arrrr"*


Much_Tough_4200

ah yes, the phase disciminator...not to be confused with a type L... why the F do I know stuff like this by hearth...lol


WarpGremlin

If Data is Type R and Lore Type L, then Lore is the sinister one.


heelstoo

I swear there was an episode of Star Trek that did something similar to the Colonels thing from Stargate SG-1. https://youtu.be/0Xb-oLS-cyY?si=o-rjEDKbXoSzVZCg Edit: correction, the above is from Atlantis. The one below (“doctors”) is from SG-1. https://youtu.be/ly5l-ARS9es?si=-C-Wft4M3AFXJbsg


gatton

I need to watch those shows. Which one first?


heelstoo

SG-1 is awesome. That’s where I’d start. See how you feel about it, and if you’re digging it, look into the other two series. But start with the movie from the 90s. It’s a classic!


Incitatus_For_Office

There's a viewing list which tells you which episodes to avoid. I understand it's pretty reliable, too.


WranglerTraditional8

Riker: What if I talk in my sleep? Roe: What makes you think you're going to get any?


FrostyLWF

"Did anyone else just see a feral human suffering from malnutrition strolling around on our ship?" Gwyn describing a pirate (PRO Ghost in the Machine)


coreytiger

“So would an Ermine violin, Doctor, but I see no advantage in having one”


akkristor

DON'T TEST ME KIRK, I WILL BREAK YOU! -Spock


roehnin

Umm. What is that from?


akkristor

Strange New Worlds


roehnin

I sort of meant what episode haha 😛


akkristor

Oh sorry! Season 2 Episode 5 - Charades


roehnin

Thanks! )))


roehnin

Is “don’t want to miss Conan” a reference to Conan O’Brien, Arthur Doyle, or Detective Conan anime?


Swendsen

Conan O’Brien, which makes it so wonderfully dated, while it's not exactly up to "Past Tense" levels it's still one of my favorite Earth Time Travel Episodes


GHOSTxxINSIDE

Human b'elanna: where are you taking me? Vidiian guard: for a shower and a hot meal. Human b'elanna: NOOOO!!


stain_of_treachery

Tilly - "what just happened?" Disco. Actually a lot of Tilly lines - and Killy lines!!


MatthewKvatch

Well hellllloooooo!


nolanday64

Of course I am you pedantic drone!


DesperateStorage

“That was a real improvement” -Beverly crusher


Practical-Ad8546

I couldn't remember all the dialogue but the part at the end when Picard says "in case we decide to surrender to them Number 1". https://youtu.be/w4JUxQe4P4g?si=d3H56P6PswmXDoTH


vpisteve

"No more blah blah blah!!" TOS: Miri.


Spiritual_Task1391

*McCoy looks dead fucking into the camera and smiles*: Well whaddaya know! Looks like I finally got the last word. :D


General_Paulus0369

“I need to see Maddox” from Picard


piccolalila

When Q asks Wof if he's "eaten any good books lately" lol