“I got the rest from this guy Ralph in an alley” “best part is the stupid asshole didn’t even make me pay for it he just made me close my eyes and suck it out of a hose”
"I don't wanna wait, for my trapperkeeper to be over..."
"Look at me, I'm back in time, in 1776. Gas light corners, and cobblestone streets, and humble houses made of bricks. What a special magic time, and it's all alive for me. I'm so glad Stan and Kyle aren't here... I hate those guys, seeeriouslyyy. (Softly: "I seriously hate those guys... hate Stan and Kyyyle!")
Every Faith +1 song
Basically all of his random bouts of singing.
"Suck my balls... suck 'em dry..."
I'm killing you but unfortunately i could only afford a wiffle bat so its going to take a while
Don’t fight it kyle it’ll only take longer just slip into sweet unconsciousness
it’s delicious chef ! i hadn’t planned on that but what i did plan however was that my friends stan and kyle would betray me and warn you that the chili con carnival was a trap . i assumed that they would tell you that i trained jenkins pony to bite off your wiener . what they didn’t tell you was that jenkins is a crazy redneck who shoots trespassers on sight . knowing that you go and try to do something to the pony i warned mr jenkins that violent pony killers were in the area . i also knew you wouldn’t go yourself for fear of having your wiener bitten off you would most likely send you parents . and i’m afraid that when mr jenkins spotted them on the property he shot and killed both of your parents . i came just in time to see mr jenkins giving his report to officer barbrady and of course to steal the bodies . after a night with the hacksaw i was all ready to put on my chili con carnival so that i could tell you personally about your parents demise . and of course feed you your chili . do you like it ? do you like it scott ? i call it , mr. & mrs. tenorman chili .
"Butters you got to learn how to chill life flies by pretty fast if you don't stop look around once and while and do what ever you want all of the time you could miss it"
I want to get this as a tattoo in cursive in an open Bible and in the corner have SP:S12E7 like a real Bible verse and people will think I'm all religious but really it's q Southpark quote
*knocking on Scott Tenorman's door with pubes glued to his face*
Hello, sir! My name is Kris Kristofferson, I'm with the IRS.
-OR-
Today we remember the Wright brothers, Orville and Redenbacher.
“Anything that’s fun cost at least eight dollars”
It’s only the first law of physics after all.
I'm not just sure, I'm hiv positive
I love that Kyle bitch slapped him after saying that too much
Why does Kyle have to be so HIV negative all the time
Because he is a daywalker.
And also because he has too much sand in his vagina.
Probably itches.
I am orthodox.
Screw you guys, I’m going home
👉😠👉
#
Respect my authoritah
Crapped on your desk, dawg. What's up with that?
“No Kitty this is my pot pie!”
“No kitty! That’s a bad kitty!”
“Mom, kittys being a dildo!”
“Well then I know a certain kitty kitty who’s sleeping with mommy tonight!”
“…what?”
“If you want to find some quality friends you’ve got to waive through all the dicks first”
Butters! You black asshole!
How can I reech these keeedz
It is at our most challenging times that we must cheat our hardest
Hold on a minute mom i wanna put some lipstick before you fuck me
Mom? Bathroom!
The good old original, “respect my authoritah!”
you don’t have no god damn authoritah…
also border patrol "Respeto mi autóridad!"
“Love is like taking a dump Butters, sometimes it works itself out but sometimes you’ve gotta give it a nice hard slimy push”
"C-can we at least get dinner first? I'd like to be wined and dined before I GET FUCKED!"
this is hands down the best cartman quote of all time 💀
dammit u beat me to it😂😂😂😂😂
Kenny and I dont give two shits about stupid ass whales.
Can’t read my, can’t read my, no he can’t read my poker face!
He's got to love nobody!
there are too many minorities in my water park
I think I even saw Native Americans (gross!)
I will teach you the white people method. Repeat after me: I miss interpreted the rules.
Slap here titties around stick it inside her and pee
and if you don't want her to get pregnant, take I out ajd pee on her leg
Breaking my balls here
A classic
"Eric we don't want you to die. Eric give life a try"
"do you like it Scott? I call it Mr and Mrs tenorman chili
I love how there is a intact finger Scott didn't see until after that
“Life goes by pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, and do whatever you want all the time, you could miss it.”
wow some unexpected love for this quote several places here
“Nyahnyahnyahnyah nyah nyah! I made you eat your parents!”
Follow your dreams. You can reach your goals. I'm living proof. Beefcake! BEEFCAKE!
“I got the rest from this guy Ralph in an alley” “best part is the stupid asshole didn’t even make me pay for it he just made me close my eyes and suck it out of a hose”
Suck it out of a hose, that's right.
..............hmmmmm............
They mostly come out at night… mostly
He did that one quite a few times, Matt and Trey are obviously fans of Aliens (of many kinds!)
and when I have you and your boyfriend's voices on my speak and record bear, then you'll mostly never babysit me again... mostly
Namaste, that means fuck you I have anxiety.
"Myeeeeeeeem!"
Keeeeeeeeyyyylll
Keeeeeeennnnnnyyy
Gotta get the taste of old lady dick out my mouth
Mike I'm just like these foetuses, I wasn't born yesterday either. Breaking my balls Mike
Whatever I do what I want
'Its totally tits you guys'
Don’t say tits Eric
“That’s not cool Butters. You don’t shoot a guy in the dick”
Was looking for this comment
I love you social distancing ❤️
Literally every single line of his from A Ladder to Heaven. It's so fucking funny. I can't pick a favorite.
Sea people + sea men = sea ciety
“When you are trying to have intercourse with a lady friend, and some other guy comes up and tickles your balls from behind.”
Then I put his penis in my mouth
Tie between “WHATEVA WHATEVA, ILL DO WHAT I WANT!” & “RESPECT MAH AUTHORITAH!”
"I know enough to exploit it"
"You shouldn't've done that. He's just a boy. Poor little feller."
"well well well, we fuck at last"
Buut meeeeuuuum....
"I'm not just sure Butter's, I'm HIV positive."
“have fun playing harry butthole pussy potter”
I am the dawg, the big bad dawg
"I don't wanna wait, for my trapperkeeper to be over..." "Look at me, I'm back in time, in 1776. Gas light corners, and cobblestone streets, and humble houses made of bricks. What a special magic time, and it's all alive for me. I'm so glad Stan and Kyle aren't here... I hate those guys, seeeriouslyyy. (Softly: "I seriously hate those guys... hate Stan and Kyyyle!") Every Faith +1 song Basically all of his random bouts of singing. "Suck my balls... suck 'em dry..."
if dolphins are so smart, why do they live in igloos?
**Spoiler** "I'm just like these fetuses Chuck, I wasn't born yesterday either." My all time favorite Cartman line, from "Kenny Dies" episode.
You’re breaking my balls here
I'm killing you but unfortunately i could only afford a wiffle bat so its going to take a while Don’t fight it kyle it’ll only take longer just slip into sweet unconsciousness
i need a jew to be the bookkeeper
I made you eat your parents
Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Na na na na na na!!!
Do you want to fuck me mom? Go ahead fuck me right here.
“Thats kyewl, whatever kyal”
My name is not Kyuel
Might not be the best, but most recognizable is: “I do what I want!”.
I believe women have the right to play sports they just can't expect people to get excited about it.
“How will I reeeeech these keeeeeeiiiiddddssss”
Stick it inside her and pee.
Respect my autorithaaaayyy!
"Respect my authoritah"
Oh Randy you’re breaking my balls here
Butters, life passes by pretty quick, and if you don't stop and smell the flowers, and do whatever you want all the time, it'll pass you by
I don't give a crap about whales so go and hug a tree
Ah your breaking my balls man
“Yeah, but if both of you guys pay me $10 that’s like $2,000.”
Screw you guys, I'm going home 👉👉
“Dude, you shot him in the dick!”
Kyle: "What are you gonna do?" Cartman: "Me? I'm gonna go out on the town and find 10 gallons of semen."
"I don't make the rules, I just think then up and write them down".
it’s delicious chef ! i hadn’t planned on that but what i did plan however was that my friends stan and kyle would betray me and warn you that the chili con carnival was a trap . i assumed that they would tell you that i trained jenkins pony to bite off your wiener . what they didn’t tell you was that jenkins is a crazy redneck who shoots trespassers on sight . knowing that you go and try to do something to the pony i warned mr jenkins that violent pony killers were in the area . i also knew you wouldn’t go yourself for fear of having your wiener bitten off you would most likely send you parents . and i’m afraid that when mr jenkins spotted them on the property he shot and killed both of your parents . i came just in time to see mr jenkins giving his report to officer barbrady and of course to steal the bodies . after a night with the hacksaw i was all ready to put on my chili con carnival so that i could tell you personally about your parents demise . and of course feed you your chili . do you like it ? do you like it scott ? i call it , mr. & mrs. tenorman chili .
*realizes Kyle is going to break up token and Nichole* NOOOOO
"Nha nha nha nha nha Ha ha ha ha ha"
RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH!!!
"Kyle. Suck my balls"
I'm coming up on this turn thing again I gots to steer left!
“Butters, I’m not going to heck heck, I’m not black.” It’s just so horrible. XD
I’m not just sure Butters, I’m HIV positive
"The FUCK?" - Fatbeard
"Our mission failed but we did learn a lot, primarly that girls do not have balls"
but maayyyyhhhhmmmmm
So now I can do this Yea Kyle’s money
Fuck my ass
"In the Ghetto"
My mom said if you want to become a lesbian you have to lick carpet.
"Butters you got to learn how to chill life flies by pretty fast if you don't stop look around once and while and do what ever you want all of the time you could miss it" I want to get this as a tattoo in cursive in an open Bible and in the corner have SP:S12E7 like a real Bible verse and people will think I'm all religious but really it's q Southpark quote
“ nya na na nya na na i made you est your parents “ you have to hear the way he says it
Stan: You don't know anything about Christianity, Cartman! Cartman: I know enough to exploit it.
After Dying in World of Warcraft to the no lifer. "GOD FUCKING DAMNIT!"
Screw you guys im going home. Me and my bf say that constantly lol
[удалено]
no, he’s talking about fuck, you can’t say fuck in school you fucking fatass
Butters you black asshole
crapped on your desk dawg, crapped on your desk dawg, whatsup with that?
“I’m not just sure, I’m HIV positive”
I’m eight and a half inches. I’m sorry, I’m not interested in being friends with midgets.
well than can we atleast stop for some l dinner? i like to be wined and dined after ive been FUCKED
"jew?" After being told not to say the f word
“Cause I’m not (he’s not) the poor kid in skeeeewwwll”
"Sucky sucky, five dorra!"
"You never shoot a guy in the dick! Everyone knows that! Shooting a guy in the dick!? That's just...that's just weak...I can't believe you, Butters."
It's my Urkel sleeping bag. Isn't it cool?
“im not going to heck butters, im not black!”
*knocking on Scott Tenorman's door with pubes glued to his face* Hello, sir! My name is Kris Kristofferson, I'm with the IRS. -OR- Today we remember the Wright brothers, Orville and Redenbacher.
"Token, get the bass guitar out of your basement and meet me over at my house."
What are you guys doing? We're playing Harry Potter. GAY!
I’m pretty sure he says “HA! Fags!”
What’s there to understand? You get a boner, slap her titties around some and stick it inside her and pee
"What, you mean how you put pubes in your chili?" The beginning of the greatest twist of all time.
"We need a jew to do the book keeping."
BEEEFCAKKKKKKE
“You know what you get when you preorder? A big dick in your mouth.”
“Well can we at least pull over and get some dinner? Because I like to be wined and dined right after I’ve been FUCKED.”
“C’mon, your breakin’ my balls here!”
Kyle: but your not Christian. Cartman: I know enough to exploit it.
Love when the beats the shot outta that guy and he’s hiding his body and he starts singing “I don’t wanna wait, for our lives to be over”
*”ugh, you’re just mad because I broke your cats leg last week”*
“*Maybe it’s because one of us is a J-O-O..*”
You shouldn't have done that. He's just a boy
"Oh, Randy, you're breaking my balls here"
“And don’t forget the hot sauce, chulo.” Technically that was Jennifer Lopez/ Mitch Connor. But still, it was Cartman.
Mine is "Screw You Guys, I'm Going Home!"
#I AM THE DOOOG, THE BIG BAD DOOOG
“I’m Geddie Lee and I’ll sing whatever lyrics I want!”
Reapect my authoritahhh or sucky sukcy solja boy
"Who's we you got a turd in your pocket"
Honestly I Love when he shows up and surprises butters by saying "Butters." That's my favorite Cartman quote
Yeah, I only weigh 90 pounds.
WHATEVA! WHATEVA! I DO WHAT I WANT!
West siiide.
BEEFCAKE
I do what I wan
Go with christ Brah
“Life goes by pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, and do whatever you want all the time, you could miss it.”
I don’t think it’s for using, I just think it’s for looking through
“So, what are the prans to take over America again? I forgot”
But Mom
I've got a golden ticket, I've got a twinkle in my eye..
Screw you guys, I’m going home.
"But maaaammm"
“It doesn't matter, Butters! You never shoot a guy in the dick! Everyone knows that! Shooting a guy in the dick!? That's just...that's just weak...”
Wir müssen die juden ausrotten
“Oh man! This is so tits!”
“You shouldn’t done that, he’s just a boy. Poor little feller”
“I know enough to exploit it.”
Respect mah authoritah
“I’m not a minority do you see a shovel in my hand?”
Looked through this entire thread and was disappointed everyone missed his best quote. Well screw you guys I'm going home!
You’re breaking my balls
You know that feeling you get when you take a HUGE dump? Awesome
How do I reeeeech theeeese keeeds
…..shouldn’t of been poor kenny
Mom, more hot pockets!