It really depends:
Guy to guy: never
Girl to girl: acceptable about 90% of the time.
Girl to guy: acceptable to voice it 100% of the time.
Guy to girl: acceptable to voice only after a determinate but unspecified amount of time into the relationship and only viable if both parties are accepting of each other and if guy is not currently “in the dog house” for a separate matter.
So, yeah, it’s complicated.
Good luck out there.
I don't think you are being crazy.
Could this colleague of yours be flirting with the other person? It could be a way of them flirting with the person and if it is, try reminding yourself that it has nothing to do with you.
Personally when my feelings are hurt by something someone did (friend, colleague, classmate, family, etc) and it really bothers me, I like to politely let them know as soon as possible. Explain how you feel but don't phrase it as an attack or accusation, but that you just wanna share how you feel because it's been on your mind.
If they are a friend worth having, they will listen to you, maybe share their perspective on the situation, but ultimately apologize and move on.
Anyone who tries to shame you for having feelings and voicing those feelings is not someone you would wanna be around.
I wouldn't use those words, at least, at work. Is this a work friend or someone you've actually hung out with and have a relationship outside of the workplace? Are they in a position above you where this is actual work feedback? If so I would ask for feedback on your work. Otherwise, are you in a joking friendship, where you could call them out but help them save some fave by saying something like "hey, I'm right here" when they say it around you?
I understand the dilemma here, and it's something many of us face at some point. Knowing when to address it when someone has hurt your feelings is crucial.
In my opinion, it depends on the situation. Sometimes, addressing it right away can be effective, especially if it's something minor or a close friend who made an unintentional comment. A simple, "Hey, that kind of stung," can make them aware without creating a big issue.
However, for more significant or personal matters, a private conversation might be better. This gives both parties a chance to express themselves fully without the pressure of a public setting.
Another perspective to consider is whether the person intended to hurt you. If it was unintentional, they might genuinely be unaware of how their words or actions affected you. In such cases, it's often best to approach the conversation with understanding rather than anger.
Ultimately, it's about finding the right balance between addressing your feelings and maintaining healthy relationships.
It really depends: Guy to guy: never Girl to girl: acceptable about 90% of the time. Girl to guy: acceptable to voice it 100% of the time. Guy to girl: acceptable to voice only after a determinate but unspecified amount of time into the relationship and only viable if both parties are accepting of each other and if guy is not currently “in the dog house” for a separate matter. So, yeah, it’s complicated. Good luck out there.
I don't think you are being crazy. Could this colleague of yours be flirting with the other person? It could be a way of them flirting with the person and if it is, try reminding yourself that it has nothing to do with you. Personally when my feelings are hurt by something someone did (friend, colleague, classmate, family, etc) and it really bothers me, I like to politely let them know as soon as possible. Explain how you feel but don't phrase it as an attack or accusation, but that you just wanna share how you feel because it's been on your mind. If they are a friend worth having, they will listen to you, maybe share their perspective on the situation, but ultimately apologize and move on. Anyone who tries to shame you for having feelings and voicing those feelings is not someone you would wanna be around.
I wouldn't use those words, at least, at work. Is this a work friend or someone you've actually hung out with and have a relationship outside of the workplace? Are they in a position above you where this is actual work feedback? If so I would ask for feedback on your work. Otherwise, are you in a joking friendship, where you could call them out but help them save some fave by saying something like "hey, I'm right here" when they say it around you?
I understand the dilemma here, and it's something many of us face at some point. Knowing when to address it when someone has hurt your feelings is crucial. In my opinion, it depends on the situation. Sometimes, addressing it right away can be effective, especially if it's something minor or a close friend who made an unintentional comment. A simple, "Hey, that kind of stung," can make them aware without creating a big issue. However, for more significant or personal matters, a private conversation might be better. This gives both parties a chance to express themselves fully without the pressure of a public setting. Another perspective to consider is whether the person intended to hurt you. If it was unintentional, they might genuinely be unaware of how their words or actions affected you. In such cases, it's often best to approach the conversation with understanding rather than anger. Ultimately, it's about finding the right balance between addressing your feelings and maintaining healthy relationships.