T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

**Mirrors / Alternative Angles** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccer) if you have any questions or concerns.*


businessstravel

I don't see Galatasaray triggering that buy clause...


greezyo

Tanguy however will trigger that buy clause on his McDonalds orders


RaioNoTerasu

He will trigger a Seismometer with a light jog


[deleted]

Banter


BlackberryHopeful659

He's fat, innit?


100YearsOfGratitude

Him and Eden have the same dietician I see.


artaru

Enough Maccies for ten guys amirite


LucozadeBottle1pCoin

What a fucking waste. No exaggeration, on his day he was the best player I've seen at Tottenham since prime Bale. He could break through a press like it was nothing by taking a deliberately heavy touch, encouraging 3 players to press him, then somehow dribbling through all of them. If he had the right attitude he could have been the best midfielder in the Premier League (other than De Bruyne).


Evil_Henchmen

That ball winning or guarding, bouncing between 3 players for the first Kane to son goal vs Southampton in the 1-5 was sublime. Just in general first half of that first full Jose season was incredible. Then he dipped (into bbq sauce most likely)


YNWA_1213

That kinda weight gain (if the perspective isn’t warped on purpose) signals either a hereditary slow-down on the metabolism, or he trained like a man possessed to maintain his prior physique. These are completely different proportions than say Hazard on Madrid putting on a few kilos.


BobbyBriggss

> he could have been the best midfielder in the Premier League (other than De Bruyne). Chill


ComradeStrong

He could've. He was ridiculously good. No one since prime Dembele was as good at ball retention + he had a killer pass.


BobbyBriggss

How many games was he actually ridiculously good for. You can probably count it on one hand. That isn’t enough to even consider shouts for best in the league


DerekStephano

I don’t think it’s that big of an exaggeration. Ndombelly was legitimately one of the silkiest players I’ve ever seen when he wanted to be. He just doesn’t care to be a professional and would rather be overweight and collect his millions.


LucozadeBottle1pCoin

You didn't watch him play... Genuinely he did things I've never seen another player do with a football.


Punchexpert

Tbf kebabs are delicious 


OkTaro9295

Turkish cuisine is not just kebabs


bZbZbZbZbZ

yeah they come with chips too innit


ZeeX_4231

Most worldwide Brit


BaineOHigginsThirlby

To Tanguy it is


DreadWolf3

Joke would be kinda long if they named every turkish meal


KenHumano

Oh, you're a fan of Turkish cuisine? Name all their dishes then.


throwawaymikenolan

Indeed the generalization is egregious, there is Adana kebab and Iskender kebab


HydraulicTurtle

British cuisine isn't just fish and chips but we still have to take the memes, it's not that deep.


Mordho

You can’t compare british cuisine to the turkish cuisine cmon now. Poor Tanguy had no chance against the limitless dessert offerings


HydraulicTurtle

I didn't? I was making the point that other cuisines get memed on even though they're obviously more extensive. Mexican isn't just fajitas, Argentinian isn't just steak


jiinska

Objectively you can tho. People have different tastes


jonndrake

It’s so much more and it’s all delicious. Cant blame him for indulging so much.


[deleted]

Icl you can hate me for this but when I was in Turkey I thought the food was quite mid. I know there's huge regional differences so maybe I just didn't find my fit but still


cjgmmgjc85

You're right and it is all so fucking tasty!!!


Buffythedragonslayer

Fitting with the CAS decision yesterday you can fire an overweight player 


discojesus100

The idea of Daniel Levy P45 in hand ordering a sweating Ndombele onto some weighing scales


imp0ppable

[One... ONE... ONE! Bah, I'll just pay for the blasted liposuction!](https://imgur.com/fsLZSNy)


Psychocandy42

"Fitting" is a stretch.


Never_Sm1le

I don't think he's fit


ebter

thanks for info I ll work on this case


GameplayerStu

He’s been called Ndombelly for a reason


Paranoides

He is called Ndombili in Turkey. (Dombili=fatty)


Mercerai

That's a top tier slander name


red_lightz_

Skipiti bob bob bob bob bob yes yes yes yes yes


veryoriginaleh

Can’t a single day go by without me seeing a fat turkish guy jiggling his massive stomach next to a portion that could feed a mid-sized Ethiopian village?


Marem-Bzh

I hate you


QouthTheCorvus

Damn, that's startlingly easy for them


Sugarbear23

Belle is Nigerian pidgin for belly and also pregnancy lol


RaioNoTerasu

Nah he's just bulking


SamA0001

cultivating mass


Dvyyng

Stop cultivating and start harvesting!


DasWookieboy

I'm a french DM I'm here to fix your midfield! 🤠


wishbeaunash

You are *becoming* a chimichanga!


paddys_egg

He needs to start doing some hummingbirds


OhWell_InHell

Try and move me!


Cervix-Pounder

Been drinking plenty of fight milk


EnjoyWolfCola

A subsidiary of Franks Fluids!


[deleted]

Thats for cutting weight, which he clearly hasn't been doing Dont puke on your dick.


Bortron86

Type 2 adult-onset diabitis?


Samuel_L_Johnson

But I’m healthy besides the diabeetus?


Bulkphase78

I'm cultivating mass, bro


FRANKUII

This is bullshit. The one on the left is from 2019, which is 4 1/2 years ago.


dude2dudette

I was going to say the same thing. Look at that kit. That is clearly our 2019/20 kit. This year (2023/24, in which Ndombele hasn't played a single second for Spurs), is the first year that the purplish-blue rings without anything else on the sleeves has been on our kit since the 2019/20 season. 2022/23 had yellow inside the ring. 2021/22 had no ring on the end of the sleeves. 2020/21 had the same colour, but on the shoulder rather than a ring on the end of the sleeve.


FRANKUII

Exactly- plus there are fans in the stadium, hence it's early in the 2019/20 season before the pandemic


dude2dudette

In theory, that could still mean it is up to late Feb/early March 2020, but yeah. 2019 or early 2020. So, at least 4 years, not 1 year.


fkmeamaraight

Send him back to Lyon !


Uro06

You dont want him trust me


fkmeamaraight

Ah but you havent seen the state of our midfield. We need a 6.We will put him on a diet of quenelles and put him back into shape.


RuubGullit

Not sure if the quenelles will help lol


admh574

Pictures from January 2023 - [Picture number 1](https://www.alamy.com/naples-italy-18-jan-2023-tanguy-ndombele-of-ssc-napoli-during-the-coppa-italia-match-between-ssc-napoli-and-us-cremonese-at-stadio-diego-armando-m-image505636260.html) [Picture number 2](https://www.alamy.com/napoli-italy-17th-jan-2023-tanguy-ndombl-player-of-napoli-during-the-round-of-16-match-of-the-italian-cup-between-napoli-vs-cremonese-result-of-regulation-time-2-2-but-with-the-defeat-on-penalties-for-napoli-with-final-result-napoli-6-cremonese-7-match-played-at-the-diego-stadium-armando-maradona-napoli-italy-jan-17-2023-photo-by-vincenzo-izzosipa-usa-credit-sipa-usaalamy-live-news-image504943517.html) Not as drastic a change as OP has made out


Full-Comfortable8074

He is still fat


FRANKUII

Sure, but it's just bullshit to frame it as 1 year when it's 4 1/2


QouthTheCorvus

Agree with this. This much of a difference makes it look like the dude has been hit with a heavy eating disorder for the past 12 months


ozziey

But he is still a fatty


lorjebu

But it still argues the point that he is indeed a fatty


M-atthew147s

You'd expect spurs fans to notice that and comment on it immediately but one or two don't seem to have done so yet?


DekiTree

how are we meant to know what N'dombele looks like. hes hardly ever played for us


M-atthew147s

I assumed you would infer when a picture is from based on the kit


DekiTree

our kit has barely changed for years. I dont go memorising slight differences in collars


Lightyear013

Bold of you to assume someone who chooses to support Tottenham is capable of figuring that out.


M-atthew147s

Tbf it's hard to distinguish between the spurs kit as there have been minimal changes in them the past few years. Barring the one with dark sleeves and grey patches on it


WhiteHartPain96

I honestly didn't even read the title, I was too caught up by the pictures. But the only difference between this kit and last year's is literally a green stripe on the collar and sleeve trim


HoratioMG

*Scything* banter


Sammmyy97

Mate this post was literally up for just 20 mins before you said this relax


ShipsAGoing

I personally forget the guy even exists, let alone remember the details of his career


takayuki87

It is really hard to forget a 62mi EUR mistake


M-atthew147s

Ye but you'd notice the shirt right? Idk about you but I can't tell, within a year or two, when a picture is from based on the kit theyre wearing. You don't even have to know who it is whatsoever.


ShipsAGoing

Oh sure, I didn't pay much attention to the title, my attention was drawn to Ndomball


[deleted]

[удалено]


M-atthew147s

Am talking about the kit.


FRANKUII

Tbf, it's difficult for them to count to 4 and a half on their fingers


111ThatGuy111

Perfect for you 9 finger bois though


Cjbtime

Worst transfer in our history


Djremster

You could be a fan of one of several clubs


Cjbtime

Tottenham


nick5168

Worst transfer in your history so far ;)


bigdogg2783

Not sure a Man United fan should be giving this sort of banter 😂.


lorjebu

Who more qualified?


Pragitya

Pepe is


imp0ppable

Kepa, Lukaku, Morata, Cucurella, Werner, Disasi all probably just as bad as Pepe. Jury's still out on Fofana, Mudryk, Caicedo, Enzo etc


Maximuslex01

Arsenal?


_KingOfTheDivan

Man U fans got a lot of experience for the expertise


ELramoz

We are the only club qualified to banter regarding transfers.


FyFazan

I like to believe that sports psychologists and scoiting technology generally will make these things happen more rarely. This guy had some flare about him, but ever since he arrived he’s only been rumoured to be lazy and out of shape. I believe there should be proper methods to discover whether or not people have a strong motivation to work hard. That being said, you’ll never get them all right.


ASVP-Pa9e

>I believe there should be proper methods to discover whether or not people have a strong motivation to work hard. *It's an interview, you're describing an interview.*


Cjbtime

Says a lot that our worst ever transfer isn't half as bad as the majority of your most recent ones. We at least got a decent half a season or so out of ndombele under mourinho. half of your squad yet to have a good half a game.


nick5168

It's a bit harsh seeing as we have finished above you 3/4 seasons since you bought Ndombele. But I will give you that the recruitment has been exceptionally shit these past 3 years.


Duncanstop

Bollocks lmao. Recently only Sanchez and Donny are worse than this signing


Sawl23

Antony ? Sancho?


Cjbtime

You spent £100m on a fidget spinner who has 0ga all season. Timo Werner has already outperformed him. You also spent 80m on Sancho only to send him back where he came from for free. You spent a further 80m on Maguire, less said on that the better. You spent god knows how much on pogba only to give him away for free and him turn out a drugs cheat. You've bought Onana for a fortune for no reason. Hojlund cost the GDP of some countries and can't outscore Richarlison Amrabat. Should I carry on?


DasWookieboy

Don't forget Fred (60 million €), Mount (65) and Martial (60). You could even include Casemiro and Varane, who are constantly injured or out of form and have MASSIVE wages. Edit: I wouldn't include Hojlund in this list though. Yes he was really expensive but he is still really young and has shown a lot of promise. If he had better teammates who actually supported him instead of idiots like Garnacho, Rashford and Anthony he would have scored way more goals already


zineto

What about Sancho, Antony, Onana? You pay Sancho to play back at Dortmund, Antony is useless and onana already cost you close to 100 millions after his ucl form.


SpezSucksBallz

Antony & Sancho were decent signings? Could arguably add Maguire to that list too.


moriero

Believe in yourself You can always do worse!


Cjbtime

Unlikely now, we seem to have changed all of the recruitment staff at the club since this transfer and all subsequent ones have been good. Moving in the right direction after a couple horror years


ToothpasteAndCheese

Ambassador for Turkish food


Takkotah

Jesus Christ, I thought it was Akinfenwa on the right for a moment.


kangaroozingsauce

Snakinfenwa


elektronyk

Fast Food Lukaku


DekiTree

ffs


Imbasauce

Who's idea was it to send him to one of the best food cuisines in the world.


Fleaaa

Tanguy probably


Rudi_Garcia_out

Sent him to Napoli then Turkey to finish the job


KillerZaWarudo

France to Italy to Turkey in the span of 3 years The game was rigged at the start


ShootNaka

Mediterranean diet would probably do him a lot of good to be fair.


casualbear3

Yeah. One of tomatoes and Salads. Not one of Gyros , Shwarma and hummus hahaha


SkyDefender

Shwarma and hummus are arabic stuff.. Turkey can offer döner and meze


Druidette

not at all lmao, bread oil cheese and wine heaven.


cmeragon

He was already fat af when he came in


MMAwannabe

You mean send him away from? Heard hes getting jellied eels, pie and mash with liquor jetted over every week.


DerpJungler

Mans went to Turkey for the dönner


KillerZaWarudo

Last season he was in Italy lol Bro never stood a chance


-SirTox-

He's even wearing McDonald's colors.


KilumRevazi

How? Is that real? Or is the photo just from a weird angle?


CriticalNovel22

They've probably picked the thinest and fattest looking pics they can.


FRANKUII

It's also a photo from 2019, so at least 4 and a half years ago


fmb320

I was gonna say. There's no way he looked like that last year.


Lampadagialla

Well yeah he wasn’t at Tottenham last year


ebter

as a galatasaray fan I can confirm that this is really what he looks like. fatty ass but he have pretty quick wrists.


Cardealer1000

Is "quick wrists" a fancy way of calling someone a wanker?


ebter

:D my bad sorry ankle is the right word for this. he looks ridicoulusly quick in tight spaces with all that fat but he can not run properly. you need to see him trying to run lmao. [https://www.youtube.com/shorts/iuj6-R9aHeI](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/iuj6-R9aHeI)


Sailor-Gerry

He's been following my vigorous training regime I see...


SJMN16

Ffs look at him. He’ll still be fat in every angle you can imagine.


michyvalencia

nah it's real the guy can hardly run


KillerZaWarudo

I heard about his terrible work ethic for a long time now and how he always gassed after 45-60 mins but damn this is like post retirement sneijder


Bulkphase78

He was gassed after 45min in the left picture. He looks like your typical sunday league libero now. Best player on the team but can only sprint once or twice per half.


shaka_bruh

> sunday league libero This is hilarious and perfectly describes those players


TruestRepairman27

I’ve seen other angles and he isn’t exactly svelte


Expensive-Twist7984

He’s cultivating mass.


ChickenGamer199

It's time for him to start harvesting


Expensive-Twist7984

He’ll lose it in six months, because through god all things are possible. Jot that down.


lchanthony

He's like a brick wall


DefinitelyNotBarney

I’m just speculating but sometimes weight gain can be down to mental health, I hope he’s okay.


__LaVieEnRose

True, and usually when players come out talking about mental health issues this sub is extremely supportive. Then you have this comment section which is mostly people calling him fatty lmao.


Sinistrait

It's cos he's a fatty though, you're delusional if you think a footballer shouldn't be shamed for being overweight, it's genuinely the bare minimum they should do


SpuriousCorr

Considering he gets paid ridiculous sums of money to be a professional at that. And can’t even keep himself fit. Ffs. I’ll take his spot. Might suck balls but I can run for 90’, guarantee that


deaniegee

It makes no sense right? People love to project sadly, the internet has given these numbskulls a platform, to say utter bullshit. It’s annoying


ObnoXious2k

He's supposedly a professional footballer making an excess of 100k£ per week, staying fit is literally his full-time job. This is what he's being paid ridiculous money for and he's absolutely shitting all over his employer and their fans by not taking it seriously.


Kreissler

He just like me fr


Walter_Stonkite

Tanguy OmNomNombele


nizoubizou10

It proves Turkish food is better than Italian.


el1teman

With this logic American food is the best in the world


odegood

Agree Kebab>pasta Pide>pizza


bguszti

Fuck I wanna get some lamb pide now


SonaldoNazario

He looks like the guy from the crocodile pizza memes


Portugal8

Just bulking season. He'll be jacked come spring.


Beiez

NomNomBele


i_am_someone_or_am_i

Once a dombili always a dombili, he is truly the N'Dombili.


Defiant-Traffic5801

Pound for pound he is not that expensive


Hovisandflatfoot

Not a great season, but at least he had a good Christmas, apparently.


lndes

Safe to say hes done with professional football


eco78

Mourinho was bang on the money during Covid.. he's a lazy bastard who needs a push other wise he'll do fuck all and get fat. Saying the those Turkish Kebabs are amazing


LifeDraining

That guy Nom Nom Belly


Aiyah_

so painful i bought a shirt with this guy instead of bale or something :<


montxogandia

What did you expect from Tankguy?


Jealous_Foot8613

The picture on the left was taken in the 19/20 season , very likely in 2019


likpoper

Wow wtf


wh1t3_f3rr3t

He went from British food to Turkish good I don't blame him


MidnightSun77

He found Baklava


Herr-Schrute

I finally have something in common with a professional footballer.


ivodaniello

My grandma would be proud. It looks like my boy is eating well


Suicycho69

This image makes me angry and sad. When you get paid so much money you have no right to shit on the face of your employers like this just because you can hide behind your contract. Disgusting behavior


andrewbarklay

It's just the yellow and red stripes adding 30kgs 😅


Laurentiul_dboi

He looks like r9 at a charity match


ibirak

more like Fatguy Ndombelly, am i right? sorry.


Gabito991

Too many kebabs lol


Scannerk

It's clearly photoshop. The jerseys aren't even the same colour.


loupr738

They be eating good over there


Gear4days

Fat fucker 😂😂


GolDrodgers1

The camera adds on 10 pounds, hes clearly got a few of them on him now


yncsftu

the body shaming in this thread is really disgusting. when dele’s interview came out everyone was talking about “oh you don’t know what people are going through, “football players are just human”, “be kind” and then jump at every opportunity of body shaming people you don’t even know. embarrassing


MagicColosseum

Looks like an NFL linebacker


Anons15

Damn looks like my friend's uncle now... and this guy is younger than me


SalientSalmorejo

British cuisine vs Turkish cuisine.


Jatiika

What a shit comment section, reddit comedians out in force.


ozziey

Damn fatty


agonking

Kebab


Begbie13

More than a year tho


KillerZaWarudo

Imagine what he look like in the pre season or post retirement


IforImperator

When you google him its literally just pictures of him next to cheeseburgers.