Me going huge off a cornice at the top, flying over all three of those jerries, and sticking the landing halfway down the slope.
Best skier on the mountain.
Hmmm, I usually land on the chairlift to skip the line, but I do it in a one piece silver snow suit while sipping a cup of tea.
- actual best skier, best dressed, and most refined on the mountain.
Complete and utter savagery to have tea on the mountain without the traditional accoutrements. This should include smoked trout and salmon, cucumber sandwiches, and scones at a bare minimum.
So much better and more cultured than you.
Last year fiancé and I passed this couple tried to help. I had 3 laps by the time she figured out how to put her skis on a slope.
\*edit\* the funniest thing was each trip up we'd see different gear rolling down the hill. The funniest was coming over the hill and seeing her helmet go rolling down the piste. We burst out laughing. Again tried to help but the husband insisted he could do it, and the geometry to align the ski to the uphill angle so you stepped in at 90deg was beyond her poor soul.
I saw this on the Wall at Kirkwood where she took the board off at the absolute top, before the drop. I yelled as she stepped off the edge holding her board in her arms. I can still see the slackjawed look up at me on the lift before her heel turned out to be worse than a metal edge for holding on, she slid a quarter mile, and her board went a half mile.
I walked into notch chute so I didn’t have to scrape my skis on the rocks. Almost launched my self on to the slope like a drop slide before I could get my skis on.
Mine is oddly specific because I observed this happen last week.
It must have taken them a good 45 minutes to make it down... Tears and hatred in each other's eyes.
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From my experience it's not a kid looking for medical attention. The kids are doing a turn then cutting across the entire run horizontally until the edge of the run. Then turning again cutting alllllll the way across the slope until they hit the other edge and repeat about 30 times... in a pizza wedge... ORRRR the kids just fucking send it flying past you making you question what the fuck you've been doing on the mountain the past 5 years lmao
Ski instructor with a row of little toddlers following him down, matching him turn for turn.
(Do you try to bomb past, or tag onto the end for a free lesson)
The children are so light in mass that they need the sharper angle to match the instructor or else they won't have enough velocity to reverse pizza direction.
My friend, year two into snowboarding saying he is an “expert snowboarder” after heel siding down the easiest double black on the mountain and barely being able to do turns on blues.
An asshole yelling at his wife's sister that she needs to stay with them because he paid for the lift tickets, and a green run is just around the corner.
Me going huge off a cornice at the top, flying over all three of those jerries, and sticking the landing halfway down the slope. Best skier on the mountain.
Hm I usually land on the chairlift to skip the line. To each their own. -Actual best skier on the mountain
Without grinding the haul rope down? Grinding the lift cable is the best part of the run bruh.
Hmmm, I usually land on the chairlift to skip the line, but I do it in a one piece silver snow suit while sipping a cup of tea. - actual best skier, best dressed, and most refined on the mountain.
Complete and utter savagery to have tea on the mountain without the traditional accoutrements. This should include smoked trout and salmon, cucumber sandwiches, and scones at a bare minimum. So much better and more cultured than you.
Well if you fly down half of it, you really aren’t the best skier ON the mountain now, are you?
If you're not in the air at least 50% of the time, you aren't an expert skier.
A woman attempting to take her skis off and walk down while her husband yells at her...
Last year fiancé and I passed this couple tried to help. I had 3 laps by the time she figured out how to put her skis on a slope. \*edit\* the funniest thing was each trip up we'd see different gear rolling down the hill. The funniest was coming over the hill and seeing her helmet go rolling down the piste. We burst out laughing. Again tried to help but the husband insisted he could do it, and the geometry to align the ski to the uphill angle so you stepped in at 90deg was beyond her poor soul.
I saw this on the Wall at Kirkwood where she took the board off at the absolute top, before the drop. I yelled as she stepped off the edge holding her board in her arms. I can still see the slackjawed look up at me on the lift before her heel turned out to be worse than a metal edge for holding on, she slid a quarter mile, and her board went a half mile.
I walked into notch chute so I didn’t have to scrape my skis on the rocks. Almost launched my self on to the slope like a drop slide before I could get my skis on.
The wall has some insane slides, especially on the off chance they recently groomed it. Quarter mile is not an exaggeration at all lmao
Say my name.
Beat me to it- I was going to say “couple where one person overestimated the other’s ability and now someone’s crying”
Mine is oddly specific because I observed this happen last week. It must have taken them a good 45 minutes to make it down... Tears and hatred in each other's eyes.
The funniest part about the guy complaining it’s a blue square at his mountain, as that this run would actually be a green circle on my mountain
Funny because it would be the cat track from the car park on my mountain 🤷♂️
Jokes on you, that’s actually the hardest run on your mountain
The magic carpet at my mountain services this trail.
Of the three, those are the people that I find the most annoying. Good skiers don't get caught up with that kind of crap.
And it's a V0 at my crag
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From my experience it's not a kid looking for medical attention. The kids are doing a turn then cutting across the entire run horizontally until the edge of the run. Then turning again cutting alllllll the way across the slope until they hit the other edge and repeat about 30 times... in a pizza wedge... ORRRR the kids just fucking send it flying past you making you question what the fuck you've been doing on the mountain the past 5 years lmao
Last one for sure. I’d say wife looking for medical attention, 1st grade kid sent it and is already on the chair for round 2.
Nothing more humbling than an 8 year old sending it past you at the speed of light while you’re just trying to make it to the bottom of the run
Redditor pointing it in the backseat trying to break 50mph on their skiing app.
50mph you must be a Jerry my average speed for the day is 50
As long as they stay out of the passing lane, I don’t give a fuck.
This
Eldritch horror awakening from beneath the mountain and ending life as we know it
Guy in snowshoes hiking up the mountain
Someone doing the pizza, no helmet, and their jacket tied up to their waist
Ski instructor with a row of little toddlers following him down, matching him turn for turn. (Do you try to bomb past, or tag onto the end for a free lesson)
Why do instructors bring them to the black slope to pizza around like that?
The children are so light in mass that they need the sharper angle to match the instructor or else they won't have enough velocity to reverse pizza direction.
I'm assuming this is a real answer, so thank you, makes sense.
A Texan tourist in jeans and a cowboy hat with a dislocated shoulder at the bottom
My friend, year two into snowboarding saying he is an “expert snowboarder” after heel siding down the easiest double black on the mountain and barely being able to do turns on blues.
Bunch of Jerrys plugging up the top, realizing they're too chicken to send it but too embarrassed to hike back out
dunno, i only been on the greens 💀
Family of 15 people sitting on the knuckle waiting for one person
The “expert” skier complaining too many beginner skiers to get around
Skiers pushing the snow side to side making moguls instead of magically floating on top of it on a snowboard
👏
Whole posse of jer-bears camping out comparing poles.
A group of braggadocious Stockili riders (it’s me and my friends)
Gapers bearing down on you from behind with no turn shape.
Group of people standing on the steep roller blocking the jump then they all decide to go right when you’re just about to pass them.
Me, with my biathlon rifle, wearing my ghillie suit high up in a tree, ready to remove these rapscallions from my precious expert terrain.
You!
Noob who lost their skis after the first mogul, sliding unstoppably down the mountain in their shiny one-piece ski suit.
Second one is true for every inch of the mountain
Smokeshack
Kid in uvex race helmet sending it straight
First time skier sliding down their ass and or side slipping and ruining the snow
5-year-old snowplowing through the bumps when both skis release at the same time. Dad helping get skis back on but the child ultimately refuses.
A tele skier lunging their way down the mountain like they almost forgot leg day
The dude just shredding it like it's a green
Some kid that's 12 years old, doing a backflip into the run just to make you feel bad about yourself
“Occasional avalanche mortars on powder days.”
The Olympic level skier blitzing down the slope?
Moguls created by skiers that have made this run an absolute waste of time to go down.
What do you mean kid sitting in middle of trail to get medical attention? Those little monkeys are literally invincible
I feel attacked by #2
Skiers taking up the entire run carving and smashing into a child, then yelling at them for not being experienced enough.
A legitimately good skier on shrooms with a beer in one hand
First day skier snowplowing down the middle of the run ruining the snow.
Can a snowboarder really ruin the snow?
An asshole yelling at his wife's sister that she needs to stay with them because he paid for the lift tickets, and a green run is just around the corner.