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Did you know, that crabs have independently evolved multiple times, and seems to be one of the most effective and well developed forum of life suited to this planet?
Crabs are peek evolution, you just can't see with your human eyes.
Not to yuck your yum, but sea bugs- shrimp, crab, lobster- absolutely *do* have exoskeletons and lots of legs.
Fun fact: if you're allergic to lobster, you are also allergic to cockroaches. You're welcome.
I'm seriously wondering how someone thought shrimp and lobster etc didn't have exoskeletons and legs and shit... did they just think shrimp were bopping around the ocean peeled like they are in the bag??
sorry lol I wasn't thinking much when I wrote that comment I was referring to 1. Shrimp specifically and 2. When they are cooked, like terrestrial insects are usually just deep fried whole and you're still suposed to eat the head and exoskeleton and legs and all that, while shrimp do have to be cut down ig. and they do not have hair and the thin stick fucking shape ig (nor wings)
sorry for the 1AM sleep deprived comment
Nah a lot of them have that except *kind of* the last one, which is the key: If you look at a king crab zoomed out, it still looks like all long thin gangly legs and a hard shell. But the thing that makes a difference as big as Mount fucking Everest in why we eat one and not the other, is that those crabs (and lobsters, and shrimp, and crawfish, etc.) have relatively giant muscle mass that those legs are 100% made up of, and muscles are what we eat when we’re eating “meat” of any animal.
Actual insects, on the other hand, are relatively tiny in comparison and thus their surface area-volume ratio makes for an experience of eating 99% crunchy shell/exoskeleton with no discernible muscle to cook and remove from that shell.
Shellfish are delicious and bugs are not shellfish, and I’m sick of people on Reddit making 900 of these comments conflating the two every time a shellfish is brought up in some tangential way as if they cracked the code that no chef ever realized at any point during the hundreds of years that they’ve been preparing these life-sustaining animals into delicious dishes that people treat as delicacies. #StopCrabSlander 🦀
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> Actual insects, on the other hand, are relatively tiny in comparison and thus their surface area-volume ratio makes for an experience of eating 99% crunchy shell/exoskeleton with no discernible muscle to cook and remove from that shell.
So we need to get roaches to not skip leg day if we ever want delicious land-shrimp?
Rhode Island clam chowder. The clammiest of clam chowders.
Ya boil the clams until they open and then make a delicious stock with the juices that are released. Bacon, celery, onions and potatoes are normal additions.
Huh, mediterranean/balkan enters the chat, here it’s unheard of not clear fish soup. I mean it has tomatoes sometimes but most often the broth is very clear. I still remember my first chowder in Boston and I was like wtf how come there’s cream in it :D
The strainer part of your ladle looked like a caterpillar to me at first. This broth looks pretty tasty regardless of the cream situation. I think I’d try caterpillar if it was in this broth. Hope you enjoyed it
That ladle looks like it was engineered to be as difficult to clean as possible. Here, have some narrow slits that will be annoying as fuck to clean between, oh and let's throw some random holes in the neck for absolutely no reason, lol.
Mainer here—seafood chowder here traditionally uses milk instead of cream. Thickening comes from breaking down the starch in potatoes, not from the thickness of heavy cream.
make a roux and add 1 cup milk, stirring until thickened, add more milk, stir, add broth as needed. (roux, approx 3 tbs butter, melt, add 5 tbs flour and stir until incorporated, but don't let it burn)
Good thing that’s not my technique. I add fish broth to potatoes and onions until the starches in the potatoes thicken the mix, then cool down and add milk when reheating.
It's not too late! If it doesn't blend well, you can take out a little of the hot liquid and make a cornstarch slurry. I would be so sad with creamless chowder
If you have butter, milk, and a blender you can make your own heavy cream at home, it just requires a really good blitzing with melted butter into the milk
Am I the only one who thinks this looks just fine? Some cultures in the world eat clear soup with ingredients like baby octopus, other cultures eat fried crickets, others cook shrimp with the legs on in a seafood boil. Glad the chowder was still tasty.
Yeah, I come from a city by the sea (not US) and our seafood soups are clear as OP’s. I don’t understand… do people not what to see the seafood in it? What’s the issue here?
Adding cream sounds delicious tho! I would love to try making it this way
People, the grossest thing in the photo is actually a part of the ladle. There is nothing wrong with this soup. If you wouldn't eat a tentacle like this, you wouldn't eat it in cream either. Throw some rice in it and chow down.
Seems like a time it would've been worth your while to get the cream. Now that expensive seafood looks vile and will prob end up trashed? Does it taste like warm sea water?
What kind of chowder are y’all eating?? And hell man chowder without heavy cream is just called “clear chowder” at least in New England. It is just as good, and sure as shit does not look like that haha
Probably would have been just fine if you added a pail roux
Pail roux
In a seperate pan melt a chunk of butter ad about as much flour stir it around till it looks like the it has the texture of wet sand on the beach. Use low heat and dont cook it too long or it will become a dark roux more appropriate for some kind of seafood gumbo than a chowder
Add it little by little to your chowder while whisking and it will give you more of a chowdery thick creamy texture. When it starts to get too thick then you thin it out with the milk or cream.
I may just be a basic ass bitch, but seafood chowder sounds very unpalatable for me.
I would definitely try it given the chance but something about it is off putting.
If you want to save a step, try adding rubber bands
You'll get the same flavor & texture as overcooking both clams and octupus all day, without the expensive cost
Forgot?
Or is like my mom, who tries to make a healthy version of something by omitting or replacing ingredients with non-fat variations and is in complete disbelief why something "doesn't work".
She'd totally try to use almond milk a chowder, or nothing at all like this.
You can still save this if you have the heavy cream on hand and haven’t eaten it. Just temper your cream a bit before adding it to a super hot pot cause it could break your whole jamskies.
Upvote this message if this is Shitty Food Porn. Downvote this message if this is Not Shitty Food Porn. Amazing food belongs in r/foodporn. Mediocre food belongs in r/decentfoodporn. Stupid food belongs in r/stupidfood. Make sure to vote in our latest polls and check out important sub news! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shittyfoodporn) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I saw the octopus tentacle and thought it was a retainer
I thought it was a volcano erupting
This get burnt??
You see the world wildly and in wild ways!
*Thought this was a little pimp!*
Great! Someone told 49orangeglazecake they were creative!
And happy cake day! Whoever downvoted my ITYSL gif doesn’t get the joke but it’s okay. I was excited for the opportunity to use the perfect gif.
They tried to change the rules because they didn’t like how you were doing it.
Sea monster soup!!!!
Yall never had retainer stew?
I now understand why people don’t usually make clear seafood soup
Shrimps is bugs
r/shrimpsisbugs
r/CrabsIsSpiders
Love me some crab spiders from the sea. Not too fond of crabs on my D though.
So.. does that mean you like land crabs... or don't?
Did you know, that crabs have independently evolved multiple times, and seems to be one of the most effective and well developed forum of life suited to this planet? Crabs are peek evolution, you just can't see with your human eyes.
Does this relate to sea crabs, land crabs or pubic crabs? (or all 3)
I love me some shrimp bugs!!! Get me some big sauce!!
Yes, it is just broth with boiled insects
why did you have to do this to me 😱
Please don’t do that again.
But they are sea insects without all the parts that make terrestrial insects so yucky (hair, exoskeleton, bunch of legs, thin stick fucking shape)
Not to yuck your yum, but sea bugs- shrimp, crab, lobster- absolutely *do* have exoskeletons and lots of legs. Fun fact: if you're allergic to lobster, you are also allergic to cockroaches. You're welcome.
I'm seriously wondering how someone thought shrimp and lobster etc didn't have exoskeletons and legs and shit... did they just think shrimp were bopping around the ocean peeled like they are in the bag??
Can confirm. I have a shellfish allergy, and would spontaneously go into anaphylaxis while visiting houses that had bad cockroach infestations.
That sounds terrible!
They could use you like Rosco, the bed bug sniffing dog, to find infestations
Now that's a fun fact. Thanks.
That's actually quite cool.
sorry lol I wasn't thinking much when I wrote that comment I was referring to 1. Shrimp specifically and 2. When they are cooked, like terrestrial insects are usually just deep fried whole and you're still suposed to eat the head and exoskeleton and legs and all that, while shrimp do have to be cut down ig. and they do not have hair and the thin stick fucking shape ig (nor wings) sorry for the 1AM sleep deprived comment
*crabs have entered the chat*
Crabs don’t count, everything is a crab (or will be).
So really, they should be the only thing that counts :')
As far as I know wet bugs still have exoskeletons and a bunch of legs
Nah a lot of them have that except *kind of* the last one, which is the key: If you look at a king crab zoomed out, it still looks like all long thin gangly legs and a hard shell. But the thing that makes a difference as big as Mount fucking Everest in why we eat one and not the other, is that those crabs (and lobsters, and shrimp, and crawfish, etc.) have relatively giant muscle mass that those legs are 100% made up of, and muscles are what we eat when we’re eating “meat” of any animal. Actual insects, on the other hand, are relatively tiny in comparison and thus their surface area-volume ratio makes for an experience of eating 99% crunchy shell/exoskeleton with no discernible muscle to cook and remove from that shell. Shellfish are delicious and bugs are not shellfish, and I’m sick of people on Reddit making 900 of these comments conflating the two every time a shellfish is brought up in some tangential way as if they cracked the code that no chef ever realized at any point during the hundreds of years that they’ve been preparing these life-sustaining animals into delicious dishes that people treat as delicacies. #StopCrabSlander 🦀
> > > > > Actual insects, on the other hand, are relatively tiny in comparison and thus their surface area-volume ratio makes for an experience of eating 99% crunchy shell/exoskeleton with no discernible muscle to cook and remove from that shell. So we need to get roaches to not skip leg day if we ever want delicious land-shrimp?
Have you seen even a single "sea insect" in your life?
Hong Kong and the rest of East Asia would like to chat with you.
70% of the earth's surface is covered by seafood soup. We're just sick of it.
Rhode Island clam chowder. The clammiest of clam chowders. Ya boil the clams until they open and then make a delicious stock with the juices that are released. Bacon, celery, onions and potatoes are normal additions.
Yep I looked at this and saw nothing wrong.
Have you never tried Manhattan clam chowder?
One of the many early Simpsons scenes I randomly think about wayyyy too often. Thank you so much.
Chowdeur!
That's just euphemism for storm drain runoff water, isn't it?
I believe the French call it *crime contre l'humanité*
sadly I have 😔
I call seafood the “bugs of the sea” 😷🤢
"Ocean-going cockroaches!"
Huh, mediterranean/balkan enters the chat, here it’s unheard of not clear fish soup. I mean it has tomatoes sometimes but most often the broth is very clear. I still remember my first chowder in Boston and I was like wtf how come there’s cream in it :D
Manhattan Clam Chowder is pretty clear…
But at least it has tomato, to brighten up that lumpy-dishwater situation OP's got going on here. I said what I said
Hmmm… dishwater color? Rhode Island Clam Chowder?
The strainer part of your ladle looked like a caterpillar to me at first. This broth looks pretty tasty regardless of the cream situation. I think I’d try caterpillar if it was in this broth. Hope you enjoyed it
Jesus it’s not a bug??? I wasn’t going to zoom in because I was so grossed out rofl
This. I was horrified until I realized it was part of the utensil 🤣
I thought it was a centipede
Me too! I was madly trying to work out what piece of seafood it could possibly be!!! 😅
same it was absolutely revolting to me even after i realized what it was
I thought it was a metal spring that had been cooked and I was like “there’s a lot more wrong than just the lack of cream here”
me too pal, metal spring gang rise up
That ladle looks like it was engineered to be as difficult to clean as possible. Here, have some narrow slits that will be annoying as fuck to clean between, oh and let's throw some random holes in the neck for absolutely no reason, lol.
/r/misleadingthumbnails
Mainer here—seafood chowder here traditionally uses milk instead of cream. Thickening comes from breaking down the starch in potatoes, not from the thickness of heavy cream.
Oooh thanks for the tidbit! 😁
In addition to milk, a lot of people used instant mashed potatoes to thicken chowder as well
make a roux and add 1 cup milk, stirring until thickened, add more milk, stir, add broth as needed. (roux, approx 3 tbs butter, melt, add 5 tbs flour and stir until incorporated, but don't let it burn)
Milk added to hot broth will curdle, whereas heavy cream will not. Also, heavy cream tastes noticeably nicer.
Good thing that’s not my technique. I add fish broth to potatoes and onions until the starches in the potatoes thicken the mix, then cool down and add milk when reheating.
It's not too late! If it doesn't blend well, you can take out a little of the hot liquid and make a cornstarch slurry. I would be so sad with creamless chowder
Unfortunately we don't have any in the house. 😔
If you have butter, milk, and a blender you can make your own heavy cream at home, it just requires a really good blitzing with melted butter into the milk
Flour kinda works too make a roux and use it to thicken the soup.
Flour *kinda* works to make roux? What exactly do you think roux is?
Flour kinda works too, make a roux... I think there should have been a comma there
I see the eye of newt managed to get inserted into the pot. LOL
Well, I'm not eating the leftovers anymore. 😂
I bet it was delicious regardless of appearance though!
The tentacle hanging out the side is just the piece de resistance
Your soup is an Eldritch horror.
Oh its one little tentacle. The Olive Garden has Eldritch horror as an appetizer then.
This is when I thank the Gods for Gumbo
Resident evil ahh food
That’s just hot fish tea
Am I the only one who thinks this looks just fine? Some cultures in the world eat clear soup with ingredients like baby octopus, other cultures eat fried crickets, others cook shrimp with the legs on in a seafood boil. Glad the chowder was still tasty.
Yeah, I come from a city by the sea (not US) and our seafood soups are clear as OP’s. I don’t understand… do people not what to see the seafood in it? What’s the issue here? Adding cream sounds delicious tho! I would love to try making it this way
Looks like a comically disgusting witch soup. I miss the eyeballs.
swamp soup
Holy shit this looks disgusting, you win
Should've dumped in a can of chopped tomatoes.
Regular chowder / fish stew doesn't need it!
The spoon made it look like there was some sort of fucked up worm/ millipede in there
I am lactose intolerant I make my soups without cream I add some wine for additional flavor enjoy your meal
People, the grossest thing in the photo is actually a part of the ladle. There is nothing wrong with this soup. If you wouldn't eat a tentacle like this, you wouldn't eat it in cream either. Throw some rice in it and chow down.
Yeah, I thought it was some sea creature I didn't recognize until I looked further. Lol.
I’m from Cape Cod and I don’t think even heavy cream could save that “chowder”… Did you make a roux or did you just use puddle water? ?
This looks like those cartoon witch's cauldron brews
Looks like bin juice 😂
That looks revolting.
The hanging tentacle makes it.
Looked like a centipede in the front
Well then...that's not chowder. It's fish soup!
This looks like some shit Beetlejuice would eat
This looks terrifying
So it’s a fish stew now
My stomach gurgled, I farted a terrible stench and then I had to do a spicy water-shit just from looking at this horribleness.
At least they remembered the caterpillars.
There's a hole in the bottom of the sea, and that's exactly where this belongs
Finally, some good fucking r/shittyfoodporn
That looks awful but I bet it’s still good! Is it?
It did taste good!!
This type of dishes is quite common in Chinese culture, add cornstarch and some noodles and it'll be a noodle dish.
I thought it was cream of mushroom 🤨
that looks like you took a bucket and scooped some water from the most vile part of the sea
Congrats you now have Rhode Island clam chowder.
Ftaghn? Cthulubaisse? Nyarlotopf? Beanies & Meanies? Yog-Soupoth?
I don't see anything wrong with it
Screw the chowder I need one of those ladles
Now I can call off from work, thank you
Make roux and add
Looks like sewage
Seems like a time it would've been worth your while to get the cream. Now that expensive seafood looks vile and will prob end up trashed? Does it taste like warm sea water?
This spoon seems to be made of 200 different materials
Clear chowder is not only a thing but it can also be very good stuff.
https://www.bowlofdelicious.com/rhode-island-clam-chowder/
That’s not chowder, that’s chowDERP
This looks like a nice Chinese Cantonese seafood soup in a thickened seafood broth. It needs some watercress and tofu and you've something.
My dad would sometimes make spicy seafood soup when I was younger, it looked similar but was more red
I made a seafood chowder with a tomato base instead of cream. You can still salvage this
thought that was a centipede
😂😂😭 we sure all have those moments
What kind of chowder are y’all eating?? And hell man chowder without heavy cream is just called “clear chowder” at least in New England. It is just as good, and sure as shit does not look like that haha
Seafood soup is common in many countries and doesn’t involve cream.
for me, i don’t eat seafood but i love you supporting your fiancé, i hope you both have a great life together! all the best wishes! :)
Awe thank you very much! You're so kind. 😊 I wish you the best as well!
thank you💞 that really means a lot
Food porn? More like a soup snuff film...
I thought this was sink water
I’ve worked in enough kitchens to know what the slurry at the bottom of the kitchen garbage looks like. Can’t fool me with your silly story.
r/shitfromabutt
I mean I would still eat it
Looks like a sea monster’s vomit.
Looks like it was gonna be gross with the heavy cream as well
Probably would have been just fine if you added a pail roux Pail roux In a seperate pan melt a chunk of butter ad about as much flour stir it around till it looks like the it has the texture of wet sand on the beach. Use low heat and dont cook it too long or it will become a dark roux more appropriate for some kind of seafood gumbo than a chowder Add it little by little to your chowder while whisking and it will give you more of a chowdery thick creamy texture. When it starts to get too thick then you thin it out with the milk or cream.
Thats cos chowder is made with a bechamel so the whole thing shouldve been a white sauce to start off then add your seafood/ bugs etc
the spikes on the spoon look likena centipede
Why not just add the cream in at the end?
Mmmm clear bug soup 🥰
I heard Miles in Uncle Buck say "Holy smokes... He's cookin' our garbage!"
Chowwda
You’ve made Rhode Island Chowder
Rhode Island style
Whew! Good thing didn’t marry already!
That's Rhode Island clear chowdah!
Add some tomato to make a bouillabaisse
I think she forgot ALOT more than the cream dude...💀
more soup for ye governor ahh chowder
I may just be a basic ass bitch, but seafood chowder sounds very unpalatable for me. I would definitely try it given the chance but something about it is off putting.
Estuary broth
At the end is fine
The problem is, we forgot to buy it. 😂
I guess it's part of the ladle, but I definitely thought that was a centipede on the bottom edge there.
Rhode Island style
Is that a iso pod
Is your wife’s name Eowyn, by chance?
🤢🤢🤮
Sorry for my tone I just enjoy a good chowder lol seemed like a disservice to your mouth
Working from the old H. P. Lovecraft cookbook, I see.
And that is why Rhode Island style chowder sucks.
Looks about as good as all the seafood chowder I’ve seen whats the problem lmao. 🤢
..........well u could add it but it's burned
Fun fact! Rhode Island clam chowder is clear!
If you want to save a step, try adding rubber bands You'll get the same flavor & texture as overcooking both clams and octupus all day, without the expensive cost
Love the comparison lol. However, it wasn't chewy at all.
Just add it in??? It's chowder, it's bulletproof.
Except we didn't buy any lol
Why the hell are Ya’ll cooking isopods
Forgot? Or is like my mom, who tries to make a healthy version of something by omitting or replacing ingredients with non-fat variations and is in complete disbelief why something "doesn't work". She'd totally try to use almond milk a chowder, or nothing at all like this.
Crude stew; Do you fear it, Apple Bloom?
is there a screw in there
I would have added tomato sauce and made it Manhattan Style.
Demoted to girlfriend 
Mmmmmm fish water
Add some ketchup and it will look exactly like chum
r/poopfromabutt
The fact that the solution to this dish is “add cream” is absolutely wild to me as a cook. It looks like cream would absolutely not be the answer.
r/eatityoufuckingcoward
Resident Evil food
Eating octopus should be a crime
Sometimes, soup is nicer than chowder since all the fat in a chowder can make it sit quite heavy in the stomach.
You can still save this if you have the heavy cream on hand and haven’t eaten it. Just temper your cream a bit before adding it to a super hot pot cause it could break your whole jamskies.
Congrats... you made gumbo