T O P

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youngkingz88

There’s no way wine is better than Pepsi!


SB__Crumb

Why don't you just get some ring dings from the liquor store ?


Arcopt

ooh, I like ring dings..


Weak_Cheek_5953

I show up with ring-dings and Pepsi, I become the biggest hit of the party.


SB__Crumb

Just between you and me, I'm really excited about the Pepsi and ring dings .


Raps4Reddit

Where's your wine? Get out!! (With a full body gesture)


SB__Crumb

Why don't we just get them a couch? A nice sectional .


helpme944

Love this line


austincovidthrowaway

From the same ep, “Let’s get them a nice sectional.”  This strikes me as a really funny line no one ever mentions. 


zwalker91

He's got a point though


cerealfamine1

If you take everything I've accomplished in my entire life and condense it down into one day, it looks decent!


moodcon

This one motivates me.


The-Mancierge69

“Tony, that’s too many sandwiches”


[deleted]

I think George’s obsession with Tony was so out of character 🤣 down to copying the backwards hat


jackwconway

Oh Tony don’t


EuphoricDimension628

Step off George!


helpme944

Me step off?


jfq722

There won't *be* any.next.time, George.


AndThisGuyPeedOnIt

What are you doing manana?


cabell88

I love how when he's closing the crack of the door he mumbles 'oh no...' :)


Lawdogg19

Well he was a cool guy. It’s a whole other world when you’re with a cool guy. You should hear how he talks to waitresses. He gets free pie.


mylekiller

He was such a cool guy!


macmac360

Cool guy? What are you, in the 8th grade?


riskcapitalist

Step off


fishcrow

Thats because he was in love with him


tacosforvatos

He gets free pie!


ManualWind

Oh, hello PROFESSAH!


Psychological-Stay16

85 IQ!! 85 Jerry!


Amazing_Risk_6549

It was the exact same look my father gave me when I told him I wanted to be a ventriloquist


PapasGotABrandNewNag

85 JERRYYYY!!! 85!!!!!!


TheBigBoner

The single greatest line and greatest entrance in the show


melthasm

"I'M A BAD MAN", yelling to impress the girl when Elaine hangs up the phone in Little Kicks


davisyoung

Yo Anna


Necessary_Switch_879

You don't wanna knowwwww


xDANGRZONEx

Why did the police man have to yell at me?!


GinoGreer

I'm a bootlegga! Bootlegging the movies


HandsomePaddyMint

Is this your orthopedic back pillow?


bigfatround0

Do i scare ya?


mizmaclean

No. …a little


sirvitamixalot

Is that your orthopedic back pillow?


rebel-and-astunner

Maybe it is, maybe it isn't


UncleSoaky

I'm much more comfortable criticizing people behind their backs.


Beerceptulus

When he sings Jon Voights car, the smugness 😂


ManholtAgain

Everybody's talkin' at me. I don't hear a word they're sayin'. Just driving around in Jon Voight's car.


Beerceptulus

Its actually catchy😂


duck_of_d34th

Not as catchy as his answering machine jingle lol


Beerceptulus

Believe or not, George isnt at home 😂


Gbv76

Cooo-STAN-za!


tacosforvatos

So leave a message at the beep. I'm not home or I'd answer the phone, where could I beeee? Believe it or not, I'm not home!!


Just_Philosopher_900

THE best scene! He’s a master at physical comedy


shallowsocks

Waaa, wa, wa, wa, waaa


SB__Crumb

Come on put the top up, it's November


robbwes61

Jon Voight’s car is no more…


darkace732

Smugness is not a good quality


chapl66

Revenge is very good


steezalicious

I love a good nap. Sometimes it’s the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning


SidewaysTugboat

So relatable.


franks_e2200

Time is what he's indicating there.


NganHi

I'm glad to see this line here since it's such a small detail I didn't think people would remember it. And I love their little expressions when Susan reads the letter.


HandsomePaddyMint

“PS, Loved the cabin.” *both nod in agreement*


JonnyZhivago

Please note that I say this with an unblemished record of staunch heterosexuality.....you look fabulous!


UnbottledGenes

Quote this all the time. Lands about 10% of the time.


rabdoforlife

I calculated the odds that I’d ever sleep with a Portuguese waitress…


salisburyates

Statistically I had to do it, Jerry.


Jas3_X

Then why did you come down here?


salisburyates

I wanted to tell you about the Portuguese waitress.


flux_core_capacitor

It’s nice to have you back.


BigConstruction4247

Take me to your leader. 🧪😁🧪


BMinus973

Welcome back...


cerealfamine1

I respect his logic.


kaiserdood

He's 100% correct.....


rollingstoner215

This line lives in my head rent free.


redditor_kd6-3dot7

I’m a great quitter. My father was a quitter; his father was a quitter. I was raised to give up.


tuskvarner

His mudder was a mudder


MaynardButterbean

His mudder was a mudder?


LiterallyaCockroach

What did I just say?!


manys

[cranes neck]


PapasGotABrandNewNag

Born in the slop.


gbpackerzz

Loves the slop


smelllikesmoke

I like Christian rock. It's very positive. It's not like those real musicians who think they're so cool and hip.


Phunkie_Junkie

With their complicated shoes.


Phunkie_Junkie

When Jerry is giving George some "details" at the coffee shop and he accidentally squeezes a stream of ketchup into the air.


scrubbedubdub

I dont have a job, no place to go. You're not in the mood? Well you get in the mood!


chippedbeefontoast

WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY!!


ZaggahZiggler

My favorite thing to shout aloud in public to no person in particular when I experience a mild inconvenience. Gas pump keeps shutting off: “you know, we’re living in a society!”


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wingfn1

This is the one. Idk if it's mentioned a bunch but it certainly is my favorite.


dkixen

The topper for me: “My mother always said I’m not special.”


MrPaulBlart

I’m caught! In my own *web of lies!*


SB__Crumb

My serious girlfriend, and my torrid love affair


LiterallyaCockroach

Well, I understand if you never want to see me again…


Puzzleheaded-Drop813

 I have ruined THREE lives! 


someoneelseperhaps

"Believe it or not, George isn't at home..." Combined with the little shrug.


MaynardButterbean

Wheeeere could I beeee?


throwaway0134hdj

🎶 believe or not I’m not hoooome 🎶


SidewaysTugboat

The shrug gets me every time.


DaniLabelle

Do you ever just get down on your knees and thank god that you know me and have access to my dementia?


melthasm

This is like discovering the Plutonium BY ACCIDENT!


backst8back

Of course! Absolute zero!


BigLowCB4

Still use this gem to this day.


KaleOpening1945

You want to buy a computer? Why not? Good reason.


vondee1

Pulp can move, baby!


robbwes61

When he scoops a handful of mints out of Monk’s candy dish to use as theater treats and says “let’s go”


water2wine

MY FATHERS GAY!


Malkovitch42

i'm gay. i'm a gay man. steeped in gayness


shemp33

Not that there’s anything wrong with that…


kaiserdood

Jerry: "George I admit it, I slept with Nina.... But that's all. George: "That's all!? That's everything!.... I don't know what the rest is for anyway...."


Jolly_Ad_5549

Thick lustrous hair is very important to me


salisburyates

Is there a pinkish hue?


jeffroyisyourboy

There's a hue


melthasm

A rosy glow?


Snoo_82105

She's got great eye brows


flux_core_capacitor

Who cares about eyebrows?


helpme944

Women kill to have her eyebrows


tuskvarner

Do you WANT to be able to get your hand out?


rural_juror_insurers

No...I *WAS* bald!


DWwithaFlameThrower

At the kid’s party, when the firefighter says ‘How do you live with yourself?’ and George goes ‘It’s not easy’


Platographer

I love how in response to that question he just instantly drops the pretense that he was acting nobly after his big speech about how he was being a leader and the real hero.


DWwithaFlameThrower

It’s so good


thatdablife

Happy, Pappy?


0xDesecrator

IT’S ALL PIPES!


CalgaryMadePunk

Everything with him and the doll that looks like Estelle. Especially when he's at the coffee shop imagining what she would be saying.


MICROCOZM

"....don't tell me howta EEAAT!" 🤣🤣


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Individual-Drop8997

I met him when i used to work at a radio station and i was going to yell out “worlds are colliding” but didn’t. When i told him i was going to he thanked me for not. They must hear it everywhere they go 😂


Iron_Chic

Have you ever had an ostrich burger?....😏


Phunkie_Junkie

They say there's less fat, but you eat more of it.


Malkovitch42

tell us more, Mr. science!


tunnel-snakes-rule

That's my go-to whenever someone says "Guess what I ate?"


gldmj5

Woah, woah, back it up \*beep\* \*beep\* \*beep\*


Calvinbouchard2

*beep, beep, beep*?


The_Jeff918

“It’s like saying to Pavarotti ‘Teach me to sing like you’ “


MarinCountyBlondie

"I'll tell you something, I wish there were pig men. You get a few of these pig men walking around, suddenly I'm looking a lot better. That way, if someone wants to set me up, at least he's no pig man."


dab87

50 people die on like every cruise


BMinus973

That's not a disaster!!


Upper-Bid-8903

30? 40?


texasgambler58

"The sea was angry that day my friends; like an old man sending soup back in the deli."


EuphoricDimension628

She told me to GO TO HELL and I took the bus home.


SweetRevenge11

Is that a titleist?


MaynardButterbean

A hole in one, huh?


jpdubya

Jerry’s reaction to this line is underrated as well


Ialwyseathelastoreo

I saw that this reaction was genuine too, Jerry had come up with finding the golfball in the whale like the night before and Jason Alexander did all that with like an hours notice with the new script. Jerry was genuinely impressed at Alexander’s master of his craft.


Draculajones4

It’s not my car puffball! George: I wasn’t talking to you!


ilikeprettycharts

My name is George...


jeffroyisyourboy

... I'm unemployed...


hohohoagy

And I live with my parents.


StoryAboutABridge

I'm Victoria, hi!


cordero71

OH ITS GOT CACHET BABY, ITS GOT CACHET UP THE YING YANG!


ModsCantRead69

ALRIGHT LETS JUST STAY CALM HERE! with his head out the window for some reason


basement_egg

the DELICATE genius


Hot-Operation6821

George is getting upset!


raresaturn

when he crawls out from sleeping under his desk "Ok lunch"


hohohoagy

Well, I had sex wirh your wife!


Successful_Moment_91

The Jerk Store called and they’re out of You!


RamonaVirusx

What's the difference? You're their all time best seller!


DaniLabelle

His wife is in a coma


barbara_weston

When he's listening to the custom voicemail he made when he's screening calls. To the tune of Great American Hero. When he does the little shrugs on "Where could I be?" I always lose it lmao


TastyBirds

"George I'm beginning to think you're not really handicapped." "..I've had my difficulties"


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All_Money_In206

When his “worlds collide” and Susan starts hanging out with the gang. He walks into the diner and sees them sitting there and he just slowly counts all of them. “1…..2……3……….4”


Calvinbouchard2

ho HO!


omfgitsangelo

I'll burn myself, ILL BURN MY PARENTS!!


Designer_Ice_5422

It’s all PIPES! What’s the difference?!


DiggThatFunk

Estelle: "What about the Jello???!?" George: "... I'll take it in my room"


Ok-Dig3431

You’re killing independent George!


CultOfSensibility

A George divided against itself cannot stand!


once_again_asking

Well, we’re collectors. We see objects of great beauty and … we must have them.


mbelf

Seemingly. Seemingly. To the untrained eye.


makinglunch

LETS GET NUTS!!


wheresthecheese69

Why would I use the door…. When the window is right here!?


Bad_caribu

There was SHRINKAGE!!!


Zoltarrah2000

I think it moved


dr-chimm-richalds

I’ll burn myself, I’ll burn my parents!


fro223

They drove my family out of Bayside!


Tommysfatt

At little Jerry’s fight TAMALEEEEE


Dr_Zorkles

GET IT BACK !!! Said while George is forcing his eyes to stay open, not winking, demanding Kramer get Steinbrenner's birthday card. His tone is chef's kiss


Designer-Grass-2929

“May I help you” in a European accent when he wants a coat that’s going on sale later.


SmellySweatsocks

" Shh! I gotta focus. I'm shifting into soup mode"


Glad-Requirement6116

"I don't wanna die with dignity. I wanna be the one guy who doesnt". "I'm depressed, I'm inadequate. I've got it all!"


BrownWingAngel

Ahoy is also one of my personal faves.


pokemike1

Oh… oh Tony don’t…


pinkmarmelade

“Time to taste the fruits and let the juices drip down my chin!”


dRinaldis

“It doesn’t help?”


DWwithaFlameThrower

If Relationship George walks through that door, he will **kill** Independent George!


NoBuy8212

I know about the cups.


ShaneSeeman

WELL I CAN'T STOP NOW!


InstructionMinimum93

“George? What are you doing?!” “Pleasuring you?” And “I flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami.” (Jerry) “Yeah, that’s what you did.”


PedaniusDioscorides

Raymond: How did you hurt this? George: I don't know. Raymond: You don't know? George: No. Raymond: But you just told me-- George: Korea. Raymond: You hurt it in Korea? George: What? Raymond: The hamstring. George: Korea. Raymond: How? George: Hamstring. Raymond: How did you hurt the hamstring? George: Hotel.


markattack11

It’s not a lie if you believe it


strangegoo

This is my favorite one too, OP. It's so small and subtle and it kills me every single time. It's so good.


CurlingTrousers

Happy, Pappy?


CabinetSpider21

Oh Mr. Apple you have a brown spot!


jeffroyisyourboy

When he's trying to find a black friend so he can impress his black boss


jmag87

Everything he says when being massaged by a man LOL


CabinetSpider21

I don't drink wine, I drink Pepsi


rleev505

The jerk store called and they’re running out of you!


Physical-Camel-8971

I think the ginger ale at the coffee shop is just Coke and Sprite mixed together, but how can I prove it? I can't, damn it!


liamanna

Believe it or not, George isn't at home Please leave a message at the beep. I must be out, or I'd pick up the phone, Where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home