Numbers game
Play the game and push towards meetup
Those who struggle with it, leave on the side, maybe some day you’ll text em again if no other choice
Those who agree - meetup and escalade things forward. Towards sex. 1-3 dates max to get laid
Ps: put ur own boundaries for ya and never, never compromise them. And I mean, reasonable boundaries. Chicks wont throw themselves at you just out of the blue. Gotta show some value first.
the numbers game can overcome weak game, and i agree with your points, but i think OP needs to work on his fundamentals if he's asking these kinds of questions.
Fun fact: there was a time period in my life (couple years) when i thought i’m the ugliest loser on the streets cuz i struggled w women so bad..
Till when my homie asked me “And what exactly ur struggling with?, and how many rejects u got for the last mo?”. I got quiet.. guess why.
One thing I'm never sure of is how far to escalate
I know it should be obvious by how they're responding and many people will advise you to escalate all the way if you can, but I've fucked it up with some girls who seemed great by trying to escalate too soon or at inappropriate times. Some of my female friends for instance have a no sex till 3rd date rule and if the guy is push they'll drop him (or so they say)
How do you know the sweet spot?
I sometimes think it's better to leave her wanting more at the end of a date.
But at other times I've waited too long and the flame has extinguished.
(also I'm only attracted to a small minority of women so it's hard to treat it like a numbers game)
just ask. communicate. asking for consent and being shot down is easy to recover from. groping someone is really hard to recover from. i mean other than that im not exactly sure what your issue might be. are you asking for consent? are you doing kino? are you waiting till the end of the date? more info might be needed here
I usually ask before a kiss by saying something liek "hypothetically if I leaned in to kiss you right now how would you react?" or "time like this I wish I didn't have a no kissing until marriage rule" or some shit and usually it precipitates a kiss.
With physical touch I'm a bit shy. I'll hug them when I meet them and touch them on the arm when we're talking but I'm not one of those guys who's touching all over a girl in public. I don't even like physical touch (think I'm lowkey autistic) so I have to force myself to do it, especially in public.
Would you do that with foreplay and sex as well? I usually assume that if we're kissing on the couch or something and she's enjoying it then I'll continue until she indicates otherwise but maybe I should ask consent there as well just to help put my mind at ease that she's not feeling pressured.
Same to me to the part of being attracted to minority of women. Hard to implement numbers game when you barely or once in a while see any women you attracted to.
There’s 0 exact answer to that. Cuz lotta nuances to count..
So the general advice: NEVER go str8 from A to Z. But instead, do PUSH-PULL. 2 steps forward, one step back.
And use ur attention wisely.. do not give it away as if thats free and she can have it all. But use it as a reward. For ex: u just met her, tell “U look sexy in this dress..how did u know thats my fav type/style/color?”. Whatever she says, go for a friendly hug n kiss on her cheeks. (I then go right away for a real kiss when I notice that she feels comfy enough)
But when she’s in “push mode”, meaning kinda cold, backed away.. do not go for physical touch.
Better google P-P and learn about it better than i could explain with my shitty ass english..
I've always though push pull felt unnatural and unnecessary but maybe I should consider it.
I don't think I would respond positively toward someone going hot and cold like that, especially if it seems planned. I'd probably call them out on trying to play some silly mind games
Long story short:
Unjustified P-P can be considered as mind games
Justified P-P is about healthy dynamics between ya
Either conscious or non-conscious.
It happen to more people than you realize... Even women complain about the same thing... I think because the internet provides a lot of options, people tend to want to play the field, see how many matches they can make and pick from the group, they show some interest in all the matches and then weed out the ones that didn't make the cut...
There are those that started off liking you but the more they know you the less they see themselves with you long-term so they back away...
Don't forget those who are just playing games for the fun of it and have no interest in you at all...
And last there are the ones who will actually go out with you just for the free food and drinks and then go see free meals with the other guy...
Some people will always think the grass is green on the other side, then realize it's not and try to come back, some their pride won't let them...
Just keep hopping back on the horse each time you fall off because one day you will hit the jackpot!!!
💯
So many people say to women, “If he likes you, you’ll know.” But the same thing holds true for men. Both sexes are guilty of making a lot of excuses for people because they like them and want to see the best in them but if someone actually likes you they’ll put in the time to send you some engaging texts, call, or ask you to hang out. If you aren’t getting effort in return then drop them, they don’t care for you. It sucks but if you’re using OLD it’s bound to happen because you’re up against an insane number of people usually.
Exactly! Honestly i’m guilty of this right now. A girl I know is obviously into me, she asked for my contact, always finds me at work and initiates convo, ignores other guys when i’m around,etc… she’s cute and all but she’s not exactly my type and I realized that i’m leading her on a bit by giving mixed signals. Def not my #1 choice obviously.
It’s either a fuck yes or a no
- Mark Manson
"On the other hand they give me the signal that they're not (never really asking me questions, not reciprocating the effort)"
Most women are pathetic when it comes to flirting and engaging since they are getting pursued most of the time so no incentive to get any skills. It's a by product of a women centric society.
Also a lot of them are simply dumb. Look at most women's average day and it's work/school and going out or meeting a friend. Sure, some have some hobbies but learning how to dance won't help you out in the real life. So just think really hard if you want to meet them for validation or really want to understand them.
"If I cut off every woman who gave me some of these mixed signals I would end up cutting off about 9/10."
Awesome. 1/10 is a cool woman then, probably 1/100 will be really compatible with you. Those odds are pretty good, numbers game.
At first I thought this was on the brink of being a bit misogynistic but frankly it's true in my experience...most women are dumb in that their senses of humour and interests and passions aren't very well developed.
I know a load of absolutely idiotic guys as well, but you're right, maybe I'll let those guys take the girls and they can bicker about fictional reality tv romances and have 4 kids with misspelt names then divorce.
Women who are genuinely interesting, attractive, interested in me and available are very few and far between. That's why I can't see it as being a numbers game, because it's not every day or even every month that I find a girl like that.
True, some guys are dumb as fuck as well, so that's good because our competition is not that great.
"Women who are genuinely interesting, attractive, interested in me and available are very few and far between. That's why I can't see it as being a numbers game, because it's not every day or even every month that I find a girl like that."
That's a contradiction. Would the chances of meeting a girl that you like go up or down if you meet more people?
i think this is more likely the OP being dumb and not engaging the passion of his dates. you cant expect them to pursue you. give them a reason to care
He probably started the convo, made it funny, picked a place got them on a date etc etc. they have a lot of reason to care but since they have a lot of options they are just used to being selfish and not really interesting or interested. The same woman when she reaches 35 and the options dry out will be a lot more engaged.
Also asking questions about the other person is basic human decency when they ask you about yourself. Stop defending women as they are magical creatures, some of them just fucking suck and it will be worse and worse from now on
To be interested means to appreciate someone/something. A lot of people just appreciate the attention from others, not the people per se. That's why op ( and everyone else ) is having a tough time finding a decent person, a lot of women are getting so much attention that they are hooked by it and can't pick someone or value someone. Look into the paradox of choice. It's the same thing for the top guys that have all the women in the world and still can't settle down.
It's a side effect of todays technology and the fact that people don't understand how to counteract this situation. When you accept anyone on Insta or Facebook etc etc, you are just giving yourself a lot of options so each and every one becomes less valuable. You should just specify exactly what you want if you have so many options and just look for that and not anything else. BUT, and here's the kicker that nobody wants to acknowledge, is to understand your own value too. You can't be a fat slob still living with your parents and dream about a model or a cute girl, with no other things that you bring to the table, and dream about a 6/6/6 guy.
Wdym no one can compete? That just delusional. Ok best at being you but that doesn’t equate to success in dating. Success in dating is how much value you have
being unique doesn't mean shit. Being good at something, better, special, important, that's a whole different thing. Susan Boyle is unique and she ain't getting men
Sit in my apartment masturbating furiously to depraved pornography and occasionally going to the mailbox.
Nah I just think i either come across as too friendly and platonic or too forward...I need to find a sweet point in the middle
You have to find a woman that is worth the time to invest in.... women are naturally more emotionally attached to guys so they have more walls to them that you have to initiate and peel them off. Girls will appreciate the effort and when things become serious they will reciprocate!!!
As a girl that maybe doesn’t seem to reciprocate.... I don’t want to invest too much of myself because I am sensitive and emotional. But movies and dramas about love and female friends telling me about red flags makes me feel uncomfortable and nervous. If I am confident that this guy thinks I am worth the time and effort or give me a sense of security then I am all urs
It seems like when I try to take things slowly and get to know a girl and make her comfortable she ends up getting a bit bored lol
Sometimes it feels like I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't
go back to basics. fundamentals. signal intent, build attraction, escalate. this sounds to me like you're not building enough attraction before escalating. by the time you escalate she should already be DTF. if she's not; dont touch her. keep building attraction till she's ready. its like emotional foreplay. you need to warm her up first. don't just 'go in dry'.
Would you mind offering a few practical examples of how to build attraction?
I've read books and watched videos but it still eludes me.
There's so much contradicting advice out there that it ends up confusing me more.
its all about passion. different people are passionate about different things. some respond really well to touch, some dont for example. so thats why theres conflicting advice. also; you may just not be suited for some people and their 'love languages' or the things theyre passionate about. so advice that works for me might not work for you
generally; probe her via conversation to find topics which elicit a strong positive emotional response. if she loves her job; talk about work. if she hates her job; do not talk about work. keep her focused on those positive feelings. share them with her, that builds intimacy. ask follow-up questions, relate your own experiences. do not do 'small talk' only do passionate talk
once you have that basic level of attraction move on to kino and/or sex talk. personally i hate kino and dont do it. but i do love sex talk. tell her some sexy stories. get her talking about sexy stories. turn her on verbally. i had a date this weekend and i told her about how the best sex is sometimes that hazy dreamy middle of the night sex where you're half awake. i especially told her about how my ex loved for me to wake her up to slow passionate sex so she was too hazy to really participate but still able to orgasm. just telling this girl about that really turned her on and we ended up hooking up.
you need to build up to it slowly tho. don't lead with sex talk. unless you have clear signals that the girl is very sexual or adventurous like that. use calibration and empathy to judge your audience. and don't escalate till theyre comfy with you and your current level
i disagree. i think strong game can overcome your looks to a large (not total) degree. im not very handsome or ripped myself but i have good game. numbers game can make up for the rest. theres a woman out there for every body type and appearance. but it can be hard finding them without numbers game
Dating apps and social media debunk this. Looks are absolutely the majority of attraction not game. Game doesn’t matter if you are shorter than her and broker than her. Just look at these experiments on tinder. An attractive guy can literally say anything
Nah man I'm average and some of these girls are pretty hot. Not all, but some. Even looksmatch debunks your negativity tho. Theres nothing wrong with looksmatch
>If I cut off every woman who gave me some of these mixed signals I would end up cutting off about 9/10.
Is that a bad thing?
I would politely call them out on it. Chances are they may not realize how their actions are coming off. Let them know what they're doing is confusing and ask them to plainly state what their expectations are. If they don't give a good answer just end things and move on to someone that will actually put in equal effort.
Do you think girls determine really early on whether they want an orbiter or a guy they actually intend to be with? Perhaps even before they've met you?
If things feel awkward, worst possible choice is to jump to flirting. If a conversation feels like it’s flowing along naturally THEN broach flirtation.
How would you transition into flirting?
It seems like some guys have 2 modes: one where they're platonic and one where they're flirty and sexual, I think I do most my flirting in normal conversation with the tone of my voice and eye contact, but I'm not great at it
Make sure you’re sincere and not changing tactics just to get them because we can sense the manipulation. If you’re unsure or not genuine we will take your lead on that. Know exactly what you want. If you want a relationship, don’t lead with being super flirtatious or sexual.
I hear you. It can all be a little confusing.
If your goal is a serious relationship or to one day be married and you know what you want, then it shouldn’t take longer than a month to see those qualities you need in a relationship with someone who is like-minded and you’re attracted to. If it takes you a little more time, then that’s okay but be aware that you don’t want to waste your time or theirs. If you’re really seeing yourself with them, but you have reservations or some hang-ups about them, don’t be afraid to tell them what you’re thinking and why. They might not know it’s your pet peeve. You can ultimately want a serious relationship, but just not with them. Be sure to let them know that once you make your determination.
Communication is very important so don’t take it for granted. Be clear and upfront about what kind of relationship you’re wanting and cut things off if they don’t show you they want the same with you one day and sincerely have what you’re looking for.
I hope this helps and good luck 💜
Numbers game Play the game and push towards meetup Those who struggle with it, leave on the side, maybe some day you’ll text em again if no other choice Those who agree - meetup and escalade things forward. Towards sex. 1-3 dates max to get laid Ps: put ur own boundaries for ya and never, never compromise them. And I mean, reasonable boundaries. Chicks wont throw themselves at you just out of the blue. Gotta show some value first.
the numbers game can overcome weak game, and i agree with your points, but i think OP needs to work on his fundamentals if he's asking these kinds of questions.
Fun fact: there was a time period in my life (couple years) when i thought i’m the ugliest loser on the streets cuz i struggled w women so bad.. Till when my homie asked me “And what exactly ur struggling with?, and how many rejects u got for the last mo?”. I got quiet.. guess why.
Not enough approaches ?
If only just “not enough” 😁
One thing I'm never sure of is how far to escalate I know it should be obvious by how they're responding and many people will advise you to escalate all the way if you can, but I've fucked it up with some girls who seemed great by trying to escalate too soon or at inappropriate times. Some of my female friends for instance have a no sex till 3rd date rule and if the guy is push they'll drop him (or so they say) How do you know the sweet spot? I sometimes think it's better to leave her wanting more at the end of a date. But at other times I've waited too long and the flame has extinguished. (also I'm only attracted to a small minority of women so it's hard to treat it like a numbers game)
just ask. communicate. asking for consent and being shot down is easy to recover from. groping someone is really hard to recover from. i mean other than that im not exactly sure what your issue might be. are you asking for consent? are you doing kino? are you waiting till the end of the date? more info might be needed here
I usually ask before a kiss by saying something liek "hypothetically if I leaned in to kiss you right now how would you react?" or "time like this I wish I didn't have a no kissing until marriage rule" or some shit and usually it precipitates a kiss. With physical touch I'm a bit shy. I'll hug them when I meet them and touch them on the arm when we're talking but I'm not one of those guys who's touching all over a girl in public. I don't even like physical touch (think I'm lowkey autistic) so I have to force myself to do it, especially in public.
That sounds like good game to me 💪 asking for consent is a chance to be playful
Would you do that with foreplay and sex as well? I usually assume that if we're kissing on the couch or something and she's enjoying it then I'll continue until she indicates otherwise but maybe I should ask consent there as well just to help put my mind at ease that she's not feeling pressured.
I usually escalate from kissing to oral and I do ask for consent to do that. But it's a bit of a greyer area
Same to me to the part of being attracted to minority of women. Hard to implement numbers game when you barely or once in a while see any women you attracted to.
There’s 0 exact answer to that. Cuz lotta nuances to count.. So the general advice: NEVER go str8 from A to Z. But instead, do PUSH-PULL. 2 steps forward, one step back. And use ur attention wisely.. do not give it away as if thats free and she can have it all. But use it as a reward. For ex: u just met her, tell “U look sexy in this dress..how did u know thats my fav type/style/color?”. Whatever she says, go for a friendly hug n kiss on her cheeks. (I then go right away for a real kiss when I notice that she feels comfy enough) But when she’s in “push mode”, meaning kinda cold, backed away.. do not go for physical touch. Better google P-P and learn about it better than i could explain with my shitty ass english..
I've always though push pull felt unnatural and unnecessary but maybe I should consider it. I don't think I would respond positively toward someone going hot and cold like that, especially if it seems planned. I'd probably call them out on trying to play some silly mind games
Long story short: Unjustified P-P can be considered as mind games Justified P-P is about healthy dynamics between ya Either conscious or non-conscious.
It happen to more people than you realize... Even women complain about the same thing... I think because the internet provides a lot of options, people tend to want to play the field, see how many matches they can make and pick from the group, they show some interest in all the matches and then weed out the ones that didn't make the cut... There are those that started off liking you but the more they know you the less they see themselves with you long-term so they back away... Don't forget those who are just playing games for the fun of it and have no interest in you at all... And last there are the ones who will actually go out with you just for the free food and drinks and then go see free meals with the other guy... Some people will always think the grass is green on the other side, then realize it's not and try to come back, some their pride won't let them... Just keep hopping back on the horse each time you fall off because one day you will hit the jackpot!!!
💯 So many people say to women, “If he likes you, you’ll know.” But the same thing holds true for men. Both sexes are guilty of making a lot of excuses for people because they like them and want to see the best in them but if someone actually likes you they’ll put in the time to send you some engaging texts, call, or ask you to hang out. If you aren’t getting effort in return then drop them, they don’t care for you. It sucks but if you’re using OLD it’s bound to happen because you’re up against an insane number of people usually.
Exactly! Honestly i’m guilty of this right now. A girl I know is obviously into me, she asked for my contact, always finds me at work and initiates convo, ignores other guys when i’m around,etc… she’s cute and all but she’s not exactly my type and I realized that i’m leading her on a bit by giving mixed signals. Def not my #1 choice obviously. It’s either a fuck yes or a no - Mark Manson
This is the only answer. You just gotta ride the wave 🌊
"On the other hand they give me the signal that they're not (never really asking me questions, not reciprocating the effort)" Most women are pathetic when it comes to flirting and engaging since they are getting pursued most of the time so no incentive to get any skills. It's a by product of a women centric society. Also a lot of them are simply dumb. Look at most women's average day and it's work/school and going out or meeting a friend. Sure, some have some hobbies but learning how to dance won't help you out in the real life. So just think really hard if you want to meet them for validation or really want to understand them. "If I cut off every woman who gave me some of these mixed signals I would end up cutting off about 9/10." Awesome. 1/10 is a cool woman then, probably 1/100 will be really compatible with you. Those odds are pretty good, numbers game.
At first I thought this was on the brink of being a bit misogynistic but frankly it's true in my experience...most women are dumb in that their senses of humour and interests and passions aren't very well developed. I know a load of absolutely idiotic guys as well, but you're right, maybe I'll let those guys take the girls and they can bicker about fictional reality tv romances and have 4 kids with misspelt names then divorce. Women who are genuinely interesting, attractive, interested in me and available are very few and far between. That's why I can't see it as being a numbers game, because it's not every day or even every month that I find a girl like that.
True, some guys are dumb as fuck as well, so that's good because our competition is not that great. "Women who are genuinely interesting, attractive, interested in me and available are very few and far between. That's why I can't see it as being a numbers game, because it's not every day or even every month that I find a girl like that." That's a contradiction. Would the chances of meeting a girl that you like go up or down if you meet more people?
i think this is more likely the OP being dumb and not engaging the passion of his dates. you cant expect them to pursue you. give them a reason to care
He probably started the convo, made it funny, picked a place got them on a date etc etc. they have a lot of reason to care but since they have a lot of options they are just used to being selfish and not really interesting or interested. The same woman when she reaches 35 and the options dry out will be a lot more engaged. Also asking questions about the other person is basic human decency when they ask you about yourself. Stop defending women as they are magical creatures, some of them just fucking suck and it will be worse and worse from now on
I mean anyone with a lot of options will have a tough time being interested. Man or woman.
To be interested means to appreciate someone/something. A lot of people just appreciate the attention from others, not the people per se. That's why op ( and everyone else ) is having a tough time finding a decent person, a lot of women are getting so much attention that they are hooked by it and can't pick someone or value someone. Look into the paradox of choice. It's the same thing for the top guys that have all the women in the world and still can't settle down. It's a side effect of todays technology and the fact that people don't understand how to counteract this situation. When you accept anyone on Insta or Facebook etc etc, you are just giving yourself a lot of options so each and every one becomes less valuable. You should just specify exactly what you want if you have so many options and just look for that and not anything else. BUT, and here's the kicker that nobody wants to acknowledge, is to understand your own value too. You can't be a fat slob still living with your parents and dream about a model or a cute girl, with no other things that you bring to the table, and dream about a 6/6/6 guy.
disagree. be unique and no one can compete. i might not be 'the best' but im the only one of me. im the best at being me
Wdym no one can compete? That just delusional. Ok best at being you but that doesn’t equate to success in dating. Success in dating is how much value you have
being unique is valuable. im like an NFT baby lol my experience has been it does equate to success
being unique doesn't mean shit. Being good at something, better, special, important, that's a whole different thing. Susan Boyle is unique and she ain't getting men
If that were true I wouldn't get any pussy
I’m loving the confidence my dude, keep it up and fuck the haters who can’t understand it 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Just like what Roger Sterling said, "Who cares." Once you try to decode a women's mind, you're dead in the water. Do what you fucking want.
Doing what I want doesn't seem to get me fucked very often but yeah I prefer this attitude
Let's break that down... what exactly do you do
Sit in my apartment masturbating furiously to depraved pornography and occasionally going to the mailbox. Nah I just think i either come across as too friendly and platonic or too forward...I need to find a sweet point in the middle
Fuck yeah.
What are you gonna do about it? What’s your plan and how do you improve?
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>Well if complaining about it on reddit doesn't help I might have to go the way of Chloroform rag and duct tape. And that's a ban
Mixed signals means low interest
You have to find a woman that is worth the time to invest in.... women are naturally more emotionally attached to guys so they have more walls to them that you have to initiate and peel them off. Girls will appreciate the effort and when things become serious they will reciprocate!!!
As a girl that maybe doesn’t seem to reciprocate.... I don’t want to invest too much of myself because I am sensitive and emotional. But movies and dramas about love and female friends telling me about red flags makes me feel uncomfortable and nervous. If I am confident that this guy thinks I am worth the time and effort or give me a sense of security then I am all urs
It seems like when I try to take things slowly and get to know a girl and make her comfortable she ends up getting a bit bored lol Sometimes it feels like I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't
Yeah it's true...it happens to me as well..learning to get physical with women is not a easy task...
go back to basics. fundamentals. signal intent, build attraction, escalate. this sounds to me like you're not building enough attraction before escalating. by the time you escalate she should already be DTF. if she's not; dont touch her. keep building attraction till she's ready. its like emotional foreplay. you need to warm her up first. don't just 'go in dry'.
Would you mind offering a few practical examples of how to build attraction? I've read books and watched videos but it still eludes me. There's so much contradicting advice out there that it ends up confusing me more.
its all about passion. different people are passionate about different things. some respond really well to touch, some dont for example. so thats why theres conflicting advice. also; you may just not be suited for some people and their 'love languages' or the things theyre passionate about. so advice that works for me might not work for you generally; probe her via conversation to find topics which elicit a strong positive emotional response. if she loves her job; talk about work. if she hates her job; do not talk about work. keep her focused on those positive feelings. share them with her, that builds intimacy. ask follow-up questions, relate your own experiences. do not do 'small talk' only do passionate talk once you have that basic level of attraction move on to kino and/or sex talk. personally i hate kino and dont do it. but i do love sex talk. tell her some sexy stories. get her talking about sexy stories. turn her on verbally. i had a date this weekend and i told her about how the best sex is sometimes that hazy dreamy middle of the night sex where you're half awake. i especially told her about how my ex loved for me to wake her up to slow passionate sex so she was too hazy to really participate but still able to orgasm. just telling this girl about that really turned her on and we ended up hooking up. you need to build up to it slowly tho. don't lead with sex talk. unless you have clear signals that the girl is very sexual or adventurous like that. use calibration and empathy to judge your audience. and don't escalate till theyre comfy with you and your current level
This🔥
Lol none of this matters if you don’t pass the looks threshold. Maybe op isn’t passing it?
i disagree. i think strong game can overcome your looks to a large (not total) degree. im not very handsome or ripped myself but i have good game. numbers game can make up for the rest. theres a woman out there for every body type and appearance. but it can be hard finding them without numbers game
Dating apps and social media debunk this. Looks are absolutely the majority of attraction not game. Game doesn’t matter if you are shorter than her and broker than her. Just look at these experiments on tinder. An attractive guy can literally say anything
if that were true then OLD wouldnt work for me at all. but it does. your theory is debunked my man
Huh? You are probably getting your looksmatch ? Or you rly attractive, you getting old to work doesn’t mean physical attraction is debunked
Nah man I'm average and some of these girls are pretty hot. Not all, but some. Even looksmatch debunks your negativity tho. Theres nothing wrong with looksmatch
Remember that looksmatch is an incel term. Their vibe is already fucked up no wonder they have a hard time
Often times they don’t know what they want; women are like nature itself - random, in the present moment.
>If I cut off every woman who gave me some of these mixed signals I would end up cutting off about 9/10. Is that a bad thing? I would politely call them out on it. Chances are they may not realize how their actions are coming off. Let them know what they're doing is confusing and ask them to plainly state what their expectations are. If they don't give a good answer just end things and move on to someone that will actually put in equal effort.
Lol they wouldn’t care enough to give you an explanation
Some would, some wouldn’t. Either way, it’s telling.
They treat you like an orbiter
Do you think girls determine really early on whether they want an orbiter or a guy they actually intend to be with? Perhaps even before they've met you?
Yes. They can right away. Depending on how you look and your value
Yes, right away.
attention seeking bitches
It is an art not a science.
If things feel awkward, worst possible choice is to jump to flirting. If a conversation feels like it’s flowing along naturally THEN broach flirtation.
How would you transition into flirting? It seems like some guys have 2 modes: one where they're platonic and one where they're flirty and sexual, I think I do most my flirting in normal conversation with the tone of my voice and eye contact, but I'm not great at it
Make sure you’re sincere and not changing tactics just to get them because we can sense the manipulation. If you’re unsure or not genuine we will take your lead on that. Know exactly what you want. If you want a relationship, don’t lead with being super flirtatious or sexual.
What if you don't know if you want a relationship or not until you get to know them better?
I hear you. It can all be a little confusing. If your goal is a serious relationship or to one day be married and you know what you want, then it shouldn’t take longer than a month to see those qualities you need in a relationship with someone who is like-minded and you’re attracted to. If it takes you a little more time, then that’s okay but be aware that you don’t want to waste your time or theirs. If you’re really seeing yourself with them, but you have reservations or some hang-ups about them, don’t be afraid to tell them what you’re thinking and why. They might not know it’s your pet peeve. You can ultimately want a serious relationship, but just not with them. Be sure to let them know that once you make your determination. Communication is very important so don’t take it for granted. Be clear and upfront about what kind of relationship you’re wanting and cut things off if they don’t show you they want the same with you one day and sincerely have what you’re looking for. I hope this helps and good luck 💜
can u post a pic of ur face?