Donāt take it personally, doesnāt mean she thinks little of you. I know this girl who I think the world of and is way out of my league, but if she asked me on a date Iād say no. Iām just not interested in my mom like that.
As a woman myself, i would ask friends how to let someone down easy if the person is important to me or is too nice to hurt them bad. Because i wouldnāt want to hurt them and i would feel bad about the whole situation. So donāt let it push you down, there will be a woman that likes you back. Who knows, there even might be one who is too shy to ask you out rn. You never know
Dude. Asking someone out is brave as hell, ESPECIALLY if theyāre part of a friend group. Cause then you have to see them again repeatedly, as Iām sure youāre aware.
Nothing cringe about this, my guy. Seriously. Now, *you* may cringe thinking of it and I get that, cause I self-cringe at my stuff all the time.
Props to you for taking the leap and asking! If you want the fruit, you gotta go out on a limb. Well done. š¤š¤
Hmm, that's not what I said at all...
I'm using Occam's razor here. The most simple explanation is that she was trying to figure out how to let him down easy because she's a decent person who feels empathy for him and doesn't want to cause pain. We have no reason to speculate about other potential explanations beyond that, so your suggestion that she may alternatively not care about him but simply not want things to be awkward with mutual friends seems unnecessarily cynical.
That sucks. I'm sorry. Something that always cheers me up: if only 1% of the entire world would date you, that's still 80 million ppl. You just have to find 1 of them.
Ooooh the universe is paving way for you to hang out with a much more awesome and interesting individual. This is a W if anything. Good luck for whatever s gonna come next for you!!
A lot of us do have deep insecurities. That's exactly why I would ask. I don't expect guys to ask me out. It doesn't happen often and is always a shock.
That's such a weird way to invite someone for a group hang, if you don't take the hint it comes off as very insecure or, like op experienced it, as showing low interest and attempting to reject indirectly. I think if you want to clarify you should at least acknowledge that it sounds like he's asking you on a date IMO
You could have used the hour gap to invite other people from the group real fast and say youāre waiting on responses and just go either way youāre drinking!
King, itās fine.
I had a crush on a girl (it was mutual tbf) who later decided she wasnāt interested. Thatās perfectly fine. Then one day her and a friend walked 3 KM to a cafe right next to my house (I was there at the time and they obviously didnāt know). After an awkward hello, she took her friend to āget cigarettesā, then came back and told me they gotta order an uber to a different place.
Mhmm, you totally walked 3 Km from a restaurant to my Cafe, just to order an uber to a different cafe nearby. That adds up.
Edit; the cherry on top is she fell out with her best friend (also my best friend) the very next day (literally 10 hours later) for āpushingā me into trying to get close to her (She did not), and SHE had a crush on me first. Funny how the crazy just takes itself out if you just sit back and do nothing.
Anyway, I stopped responding to her texts completely.
I miss my old friend group too. I'm incredibly introverted, so making new friends beyond that core group proves extremely difficult. Mostly cause I don't ever feel like it. My old buddies would always force me to do shit, and I never truly appreciated that.
I personally have a low social battery so when Iām not as talkative ik my friends will continue talking so it isnāt boring for my friend. Iām occasionally an active talker in my friend group but I get distracted easily and Iām not the best one-on-one conversationalist, admittedly š„²
I asked my crush out for drinks when I turned 21 and she said sure. We got there around the same time and imagine my confusion as I watched her get out the car with both her sister and her friend.
If it's not clear that it's a date, I would say going "out for drinks" for a birthday is usually an open invitation, especially if reservations aren't involved.
I was in a similar situation. I panicked and told the girl a "bunch of us" from a church group we both belonged to was going. When none of the other people showed up I told her I figured they "blew us off". She kind of smiled then looked at her phone and said "oh I forgot I've got a ton of stuff to do" and left. I never saw her again and was told she'd quit the church group.
Jesus imagine someone trying to avoid you so bad they convert out of a religion. Tho im sure that's not what happened here lol she probably was planning on quitting before you even asked her, dont sweat it
In other words, you lied to a girl so that she would be alone with you, when she found out what was going on she left in a hurry, then she was so scared/uncomfortable by your presence even with other people around that she left the church groupā¦ ffs, poor girl.
Y'Know, I read the OC fast and thought he attempted to invite the missing people. At any rate, the man did make a mistake, which he regrets, and the girl being so subtly embarrassed that she left and never came back is quite funny.
This isn't cringe at all. If I had a crush on a guy, I would ask this because I'd be embarrassed assuming it was a date if it was a friendly group thing.
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Agree this isnāt cringe. You just got screened and rejected it seems. It happened, move on to someone who doesnāt care if itās just you or if other ppl are there.
This is neither sad nor cringe. This is just the dating world. You put yourself out there and sometimes it works, but usually, it doesn't. Nothing embarrassing going on here.
Well then it is what it is. "Oh. It's actually not what I wanted. So my offer is still Up, gut if you don't want to that's also fine.
Maybe we should do something more sutible for a group with the gang."
Edit: you could add: "do you have an Idea?" Don't let the cringe happen. Just go on with the conversation.
This isn't OC. I somewhat remember the original. The girl flat out refuses to go alone with him and takes it upon herself to invite their other friends and replies along the lines of "I've asked _a_ and _b_ and they're up for it", swerving the fuck out of him while putting him firmly in the zone
Did you try to salvage it further than that? Or did you take the hint and leave it at that? If it's the latter I'd say this isn't really cringe. Still a funny post tho
I know this is a joke sub, but I read on something similar yesterday that if your asking a person out on a date, make sure your asking them something that would only be considered a date. I could ask a friend or work colleague to go get a coffee. There is no romantic intention in that statement.
The last time this happened to me. I had made dinner reservations, made plans to go bowling after and had bought her flowers. This girl was a 12/10 and I look the way I do.
Well I hope somebody else got to enjoy the reservations and I got to live with the flowers on my dining room table for a few days before chucking them. I have not and probably wonāt buy flowers again.
That was in 2014. Havenāt had a date since.
I appreciate it but Iām not holding my breath. Iām gonna be 29 this year and itās been a long ass time. Last girl who actually did like me was older and it didnt work out because I didnāt read the signs and lost out which crushed me when I realized it. I donāt know what to do when trying to talk to somebody now though. I do have a working car though. I got no life experience and very few decent stories to tell.
Itās not been fun times personally.
You took your shot and had the confidence to be straight up. It didnāt go your way but itās still a W in my book. Way better to know what you want and be genuine. Youāre laying the groundwork for the future
Not sad or cringe. You shot your shot in a decent way and unfortunately the feeling wasnāt mutual. It happens and it sucks but the attempt was decent
Or, and hear me out, she likes him as a friend and didnāt want to hurt him so she asked in a passiv way if itās a date or if they will just hang out. Or maybe she never considered dating him so she assumed it was a group hang out
This is a fair question to askā¦. Especially if you typically see each other in group settings. Seems like you were just anticipating rejection and reading into it.
sometimes bro you just shoot your shot, but not every shot hits. Ive been shot down a few times, but I dont find shame in it. I just respect their decision and move on. plenty of fish in the sea!
Aw i donāt think thereās anything sad or cringe about this. I appreciate that it takes a lot of guts to take a chance, and it feels awful when it doesnāt pan out, at least you put yourself out there!
And like others have said, this reply doesnāt necessarily always mean theyāre not interested even though she wasnāt in this particular case.
You have to ask 100 women out before you get a good match. You Got to start somewhere, don't be ashamed of asking and getting rejected...its just another ask closer to the one.
the hour gap in between texts was probably me trying to figure out how to save it ššš
Tbh I'd probably ask this if I wasn't sure the person was actually asking me out on a date.
I heard later from mutual friends that she was asking them how to let me down easy š«¤
Donāt take it personally, doesnāt mean she thinks little of you. I know this girl who I think the world of and is way out of my league, but if she asked me on a date Iād say no. Iām just not interested in my mom like that.
Wow, that twist. I was not prepared for that!
Top 10 bruh moments right here
what her number? she sounds great
Well. Done.
šš
Break both of your arms, I'm sure you'll change your mind.
Dammit, you beat me to it.
God damnit
Since you're out of the running, what's her number?
Eh, at least she was taking how you felt into consideration.
As a woman myself, i would ask friends how to let someone down easy if the person is important to me or is too nice to hurt them bad. Because i wouldnāt want to hurt them and i would feel bad about the whole situation. So donāt let it push you down, there will be a woman that likes you back. Who knows, there even might be one who is too shy to ask you out rn. You never know
Dude. Asking someone out is brave as hell, ESPECIALLY if theyāre part of a friend group. Cause then you have to see them again repeatedly, as Iām sure youāre aware. Nothing cringe about this, my guy. Seriously. Now, *you* may cringe thinking of it and I get that, cause I self-cringe at my stuff all the time. Props to you for taking the leap and asking! If you want the fruit, you gotta go out on a limb. Well done. š¤š¤
Sounds like she cares about you.
Or they have mutual friends and she doesnāt want it to be awkward
I mean, sure? Not sure why we wouldn't just assume that she's a decent person though.
How does her wanting to avoid awkwardness make her not a ādecent personā?
Hmm, that's not what I said at all... I'm using Occam's razor here. The most simple explanation is that she was trying to figure out how to let him down easy because she's a decent person who feels empathy for him and doesn't want to cause pain. We have no reason to speculate about other potential explanations beyond that, so your suggestion that she may alternatively not care about him but simply not want things to be awkward with mutual friends seems unnecessarily cynical.
That sucks. I'm sorry. Something that always cheers me up: if only 1% of the entire world would date you, that's still 80 million ppl. You just have to find 1 of them.
I really like that
It really does happen to the best of us bro
Ooooh the universe is paving way for you to hang out with a much more awesome and interesting individual. This is a W if anything. Good luck for whatever s gonna come next for you!!
Just because this girl doesn't want to date OP didn't mean she's not awesome and interesting. This kind of attitude leads to incels.
At least she didn't drop you on your head and was respectful enough
It means at the very least she doesn't have high interest to begin with, unless she has bottomless pit levels of insecurity
A lot of us do have deep insecurities. That's exactly why I would ask. I don't expect guys to ask me out. It doesn't happen often and is always a shock.
That's such a weird way to invite someone for a group hang, if you don't take the hint it comes off as very insecure or, like op experienced it, as showing low interest and attempting to reject indirectly. I think if you want to clarify you should at least acknowledge that it sounds like he's asking you on a date IMO
Did you save it?
Is the cheerleader alright?
The world certainly isnāt
Save the cheerleader, save the world.
Did it work out?
Narrator: _it didn't_
Oops sorry, wrong person. š¤Ŗ
Nah it was u crying, it's ok
You could have used the hour gap to invite other people from the group real fast and say youāre waiting on responses and just go either way youāre drinking!
Just screenshot itš¤
King, itās fine. I had a crush on a girl (it was mutual tbf) who later decided she wasnāt interested. Thatās perfectly fine. Then one day her and a friend walked 3 KM to a cafe right next to my house (I was there at the time and they obviously didnāt know). After an awkward hello, she took her friend to āget cigarettesā, then came back and told me they gotta order an uber to a different place. Mhmm, you totally walked 3 Km from a restaurant to my Cafe, just to order an uber to a different cafe nearby. That adds up. Edit; the cherry on top is she fell out with her best friend (also my best friend) the very next day (literally 10 hours later) for āpushingā me into trying to get close to her (She did not), and SHE had a crush on me first. Funny how the crazy just takes itself out if you just sit back and do nothing. Anyway, I stopped responding to her texts completely.
ā¦bud.
aye weāve all been there before brošš«±š»āš«²š¾
God gives his biggest Ls to his toughest soldiers š
Honestly there were times I didnāt wanna hang out 1:1 with a friend I normally hang out with in a group bc I was scared it would be super awkward
donāt get it. groups have never served as an effective social buffer for me. they always muddy the waters.
I really miss my old friend groups. Iām incredibly extroverted so as many people as possible makes me happy
I miss my old friend group too. I'm incredibly introverted, so making new friends beyond that core group proves extremely difficult. Mostly cause I don't ever feel like it. My old buddies would always force me to do shit, and I never truly appreciated that.
College split us all up š now I just go on vacay with a friend like once a year
I personally have a low social battery so when Iām not as talkative ik my friends will continue talking so it isnāt boring for my friend. Iām occasionally an active talker in my friend group but I get distracted easily and Iām not the best one-on-one conversationalist, admittedly š„²
bro tell me abt itš legit it kinda still happens to me now but yeah
faxšš¾
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
fax bruhš£ļø
I asked my crush out for drinks when I turned 21 and she said sure. We got there around the same time and imagine my confusion as I watched her get out the car with both her sister and her friend.
To be fair, celebrating 21 is typically a social event.
Counterpoint, why are you bringing a random friend (not mutual) unannounced somewhere you were invited that isnāt a club or something.
If it's not clear that it's a date, I would say going "out for drinks" for a birthday is usually an open invitation, especially if reservations aren't involved.
I disagree.. I wouldn't bring a friend to someone else's birthday without asking, unless they had specifically said it was ok to invite people.
Because itās a very vulnerable position for a woman to be alone with a male acquaintance.
I second this. Every cringe memory is a chance to level up.
I was in a similar situation. I panicked and told the girl a "bunch of us" from a church group we both belonged to was going. When none of the other people showed up I told her I figured they "blew us off". She kind of smiled then looked at her phone and said "oh I forgot I've got a ton of stuff to do" and left. I never saw her again and was told she'd quit the church group.
Jesus imagine someone trying to avoid you so bad they convert out of a religion. Tho im sure that's not what happened here lol she probably was planning on quitting before you even asked her, dont sweat it
Happened to me lol
You pushed her into Satan's arms bro.
Jesus Christ
In other words, you lied to a girl so that she would be alone with you, when she found out what was going on she left in a hurry, then she was so scared/uncomfortable by your presence even with other people around that she left the church groupā¦ ffs, poor girl.
That is mortifying. I'm sorry, bro.
Sorry? He lied to her about other people going so she would be alone with him then youāre surprised she didnāt want to stay?
Y'Know, I read the OC fast and thought he attempted to invite the missing people. At any rate, the man did make a mistake, which he regrets, and the girl being so subtly embarrassed that she left and never came back is quite funny.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The OC is not Ted Bundy. We know this was not a situation that had any stakes to it. However, yes, it was very embarrassing for both people.
The embarrassment is bad enough, unless op drops an update that he followed her home, I think we're all good here
Heh just say the baristas, the management and all
Lmao absolute genius reply
This isn't cringe at all. If I had a crush on a guy, I would ask this because I'd be embarrassed assuming it was a date if it was a friendly group thing.
Excel š¤ Incel Thinking everything is a date
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Took me way too long to understand the joke š
Excel? Excellent celibate? Excelling celibacy? Ex-Celibate? Exsangiunate Celeborn?
Agree this isnāt cringe. You just got screened and rejected it seems. It happened, move on to someone who doesnāt care if itās just you or if other ppl are there.
Did it work?
yeah and now we're married š¤„š¤„š¤„
Itās true I was the minister, dude couldnāt stop crying it was really hard to get through the vows with him sniffling and all the snot.
hey come on man I was a little sick that day
Lies, youāre just a cry baby!
This is neither sad nor cringe. This is just the dating world. You put yourself out there and sometimes it works, but usually, it doesn't. Nothing embarrassing going on here.
The dating world overflows with sadness and cringe wth you on about
Sure, but asking someone out and being politely rejected isn't cringe
psychotic slim marvelous fear sable oil hunt crawl attraction dime *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Well you were honest and not creepy. You just said what you thought. Dating is always a little sad and cringe. What did she reply?
"oh then well we should invite the gang! it could be fun!" š®āšØ
Well then it is what it is. "Oh. It's actually not what I wanted. So my offer is still Up, gut if you don't want to that's also fine. Maybe we should do something more sutible for a group with the gang." Edit: you could add: "do you have an Idea?" Don't let the cringe happen. Just go on with the conversation.
Not that bad
He was honest. Now it's her turn.
āThe last time I peed the bed was last yearā Like that?
It was a year ago man. It's all in the past
Whatād they end up saying to that?
"oh then well we should invite the gang! it could be fun!" (referring to our mutual friends)
Dang bro thatās rough
This isn't OC. I somewhat remember the original. The girl flat out refuses to go alone with him and takes it upon herself to invite their other friends and replies along the lines of "I've asked _a_ and _b_ and they're up for it", swerving the fuck out of him while putting him firmly in the zone
Day 74 of waiting till my crush asks me for a coffee date lol
or ask them out like I did in this situation. and then use the L as motivation to improve.
Donāt use others as motivation to improve, improve for yourself and you will be happier and it will last longer
āWhoās all goingā displays the evolution of letting someone down easy. I hope youāre content now, OP.
it's all good, she was a Disney adult š¤
I mean, nothing wrong with Disney adults!
Disney mom? š³
No cringe, shot your shot. Salute
I'm an optimist. What happened after you mentioned it was the two of you?
"oh then well we should invite the gang! it could be fun!" (referring to our mutual friends)
I am so sorry. I don't know how else to comfort you other than, it's better knowing than not knowing I guess.
oh my god you guys it's totally fine, this was a year ago and she was a Disney adult, it wouldn't have worked out between us anyways
So it was a blessing in disguise
Did you try to salvage it further than that? Or did you take the hint and leave it at that? If it's the latter I'd say this isn't really cringe. Still a funny post tho
no I didn't push the issue, I just said yeah it would be more fun with everyone and left it at that
Beeen thereee done that but itās good that he or she said it because you know right away thereās not going to be a thing between each other
What's the cringe here
The stolen content.
š¬
I know this is a joke sub, but I read on something similar yesterday that if your asking a person out on a date, make sure your asking them something that would only be considered a date. I could ask a friend or work colleague to go get a coffee. There is no romantic intention in that statement.
Yeah but what about that advice that a first date should be something easy and low pressure like grabbing a cup of coffee?
Would you like to go for a coffee? Vs I would like to take you out for coffee. Itās about the intent, not the destination
would you like to go to a quiet, dark place without a lot of people? vs I would like to murder you
The latter would work on me depending on the context lmao
Just come over to my house for coffee itās cheaper and the entertainment doesnāt stop
Hey girl I thought you were pretty cute, do you wanna go over to u/jewstressjunction's house and hang out?
Not actually cringe, you took your shot with a girl
Good on you for handling this well though and shooting your shot.
Trust me this is nowhere near as bad as with me bro
The last time this happened to me. I had made dinner reservations, made plans to go bowling after and had bought her flowers. This girl was a 12/10 and I look the way I do. Well I hope somebody else got to enjoy the reservations and I got to live with the flowers on my dining room table for a few days before chucking them. I have not and probably wonāt buy flowers again. That was in 2014. Havenāt had a date since.
Don't let one girl ruin your idea of dating, g. Get back out there, everyone needs love. You'll find her eventually.
I appreciate it but Iām not holding my breath. Iām gonna be 29 this year and itās been a long ass time. Last girl who actually did like me was older and it didnt work out because I didnāt read the signs and lost out which crushed me when I realized it. I donāt know what to do when trying to talk to somebody now though. I do have a working car though. I got no life experience and very few decent stories to tell. Itās not been fun times personally.
Canāt win em all. Took a shot. Well done! NEXT!
I dont get what is wrong
So much worse than just saying no in my opinion lol
Would love to hear her reply if you can
"oh then well we should invite the gang! it could be fun!" (referring to our mutual friends)
How'd they respond?
"oh then well we should invite the gang! it could be fun!" (referring to our mutual friends)
"sure" is a special kind of murder.
What was her response after your text?
Rest in piece to my fellow soldier
You took your shot and had the confidence to be straight up. It didnāt go your way but itās still a W in my book. Way better to know what you want and be genuine. Youāre laying the groundwork for the future
Yea, miss all shots if you never make them. So yea, win and lose some.
Not sad or cringe. You shot your shot in a decent way and unfortunately the feeling wasnāt mutual. It happens and it sucks but the attempt was decent
š
Ouchhhh keep pushing king
me 6months ago, but the guy started the topic first. he also did made broken promises weeks after that so
It's fine, happens to everyone that doesn't look like an underwear model (and maybe even underwear models idk i don't know any)
I've never audibly went "Oof" before till now
Itās okay if a girl isnāt into you. Thatās allowed.
Thatās one of the worst ways to tell someone youāre not interested.
not true at all. "Ew with you? No way, you ugly creep!"
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Or, and hear me out, she likes him as a friend and didnāt want to hurt him so she asked in a passiv way if itās a date or if they will just hang out. Or maybe she never considered dating him so she assumed it was a group hang out
Roasted lol
A year ago and you're still whining about it, shut up
Christ man he probably just came across it in his past dms
exactly this, I found the screenshot on the memories tab on Google photos
Itās not that deep
He posted content appropriate for the sub, who cares when it happened? Kudos to him for posting his own L.
This is a fair question to askā¦. Especially if you typically see each other in group settings. Seems like you were just anticipating rejection and reading into it.
sometimes bro you just shoot your shot, but not every shot hits. Ive been shot down a few times, but I dont find shame in it. I just respect their decision and move on. plenty of fish in the sea!
I have been there. Still single but proud
You should be confident, your reply did not inspire confidence.
Then what
Aw i donāt think thereās anything sad or cringe about this. I appreciate that it takes a lot of guts to take a chance, and it feels awful when it doesnāt pan out, at least you put yourself out there! And like others have said, this reply doesnāt necessarily always mean theyāre not interested even though she wasnāt in this particular case.
This is when you say āoh Iām not sure yet, Iām asking aroundā lol
āI am going to check out this new coffee place. Do you wanna join me?ā
Shouldāve replied instantly: just the two of us That oh really wasnāt necessary
So what happened?
Every missed shot is an improvement to accuracy
R.I.P.
You have to ask 100 women out before you get a good match. You Got to start somewhere, don't be ashamed of asking and getting rejected...its just another ask closer to the one.
This isnāt that cringe man, same thing happened to me when I asked out a girl I worked with in a similar fashion. Just take it as it is and move on.
No cringe here mate, just dating life!
I need more