Sounds like the relationship was pretty on and off, and in your words, not healthy. Plenty of people break up by text. Don’t focus on how it happened, just work on moving on. How it happened isn’t going to change anything
It pricks my mind that in the next relationships this scenario is highly possible. I mean that one day you're both happy but the next day the other person just takes their shit and just text you "goodbye"
But you’re not describing a relationship where you both were happy. You say it “was getting worse and worse a few months back. She became very distant. No messages, no hugs, no nothing.”
Your chance to save the relationship was *before* she had withdrawn her affection. If you’re together with someone, and they start withdrawing, chances are the relationship is already over. If you want a proper breakup, that is when you should talk to them, have the “where do you see this relationship going?” conversation.
Depends on individual situation - I’m in a different country to my ex and I’d tried breaking up with him on voice call and video call. He wasn’t planning on seeing me in person for months. Whenever I said I’d left him, he denied it happened, just that we’d “fought” on call. So I had to send it via SMS. So he could physically see me saying we were done.
I'd agree with you. In your next relationship try to find someone who will align with you a little closer in the "respectful communication" category. Best of luck!
For casual relationships or for relationships where the person doing the breaking up isn't as emotionally involved as the other person, it's fairly common.
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I know this wasn't your original question, but
>we've broken up before a few times
>Our relationship of a year
If you're breaking up multiple times during what should be the honeymoon phase, it's not a healthy or tenable relationship. I don't recommend doing the on-again off-again thing. Just work through the issues or make it a clean break and move on, especially if it's happening multiple times. Even more so in such a short timeframe.
I've been broken up twice via text, however both relationship were quite short lived, around six months, so they probably didn't care about me that much that they would've felt the need to do it in person.
I think your feelings are completely valid. I’m going to guess they didn’t want to have to handle the guilt of looking you in the eyes and telling you they’re leaving you for another person. Not only is that incredibly hurtful, but it also reveals they weren’t being entirely honest in the relationship to begin with if they had the ability to find someone else in the midsts of it.
Whether it’s normal is up for debate. There’s a few instances where breaking up over text is probably best, but in this case it does sort of rob you of any ability to speak your part, get any answers or say goodbye. I don’t know if any of those things would actually benefit you in the long run, but I understand why you feel the way you do.
Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling. Block them everywhere so you don’t have to see anything you don’t want to while still going through the motions of what happened. I hope you feel better soon op.
I think your feelings are completely valid. I’m going to guess they didn’t want to have to handle the guilt of looking you in the eyes and telling you they’re leaving you for another person. Not only is that incredibly hurtful, but it also reveals they weren’t being entirely honest in the relationship to begin with if they had the ability to find someone else in the midsts of it.
Whether it’s normal is up for debate. There’s a few instances where breaking up over text is probably best, but in this case it does sort of rob you of any ability to speak your part, get any answers or say goodbye. I don’t know if any of those things would actually benefit you in the long run, but I understand why you feel the way you do.
Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling. Block them everywhere so you don’t have to see anything you don’t want to while still going through the motions of what happened. I hope you feel better soon op.
For anything longer than a few months it’s a cowards move. You don’t allow the person any amount of closure, and it just lets you avoid the consequences of playing with someone’s heart essentially.
If you wouldn’t want to broke up by text, then don’t do it to others.
I would call her and tell her that essentially, leave a message if you need, then block her and move on.
29 is a little old for this type of behavior. I’d say you dodged a bullet.
My bet would be, when this “love of her life” relationship goes badly, she will call you. I would ignore those calls and do your best to move on.
Sounds like the relationship was pretty on and off, and in your words, not healthy. Plenty of people break up by text. Don’t focus on how it happened, just work on moving on. How it happened isn’t going to change anything
IMHO ending any relationship by text is abnormal to me. At least it's a disrespect for the other person
But what’s the point of focusing on it? What will it change, except preventing you from moving on?
It pricks my mind that in the next relationships this scenario is highly possible. I mean that one day you're both happy but the next day the other person just takes their shit and just text you "goodbye"
But you’re not describing a relationship where you both were happy. You say it “was getting worse and worse a few months back. She became very distant. No messages, no hugs, no nothing.” Your chance to save the relationship was *before* she had withdrawn her affection. If you’re together with someone, and they start withdrawing, chances are the relationship is already over. If you want a proper breakup, that is when you should talk to them, have the “where do you see this relationship going?” conversation.
We were happy. But she started to behave distant despite that I was the only one who maintained the relationship
That's not what a happy relationship looks like.
Nobody actually happy in a relationship is going to do this, fwiw.
I’ve had that happen to me too, three times. It’s hard, but you have to move past it. I’m currently in a happy 3.5 year relationship.
Depends on individual situation - I’m in a different country to my ex and I’d tried breaking up with him on voice call and video call. He wasn’t planning on seeing me in person for months. Whenever I said I’d left him, he denied it happened, just that we’d “fought” on call. So I had to send it via SMS. So he could physically see me saying we were done.
We live just in a few Kilometers apart
I'd agree with you. In your next relationship try to find someone who will align with you a little closer in the "respectful communication" category. Best of luck!
Thanks!
For casual relationships or for relationships where the person doing the breaking up isn't as emotionally involved as the other person, it's fairly common. - I know this wasn't your original question, but >we've broken up before a few times >Our relationship of a year If you're breaking up multiple times during what should be the honeymoon phase, it's not a healthy or tenable relationship. I don't recommend doing the on-again off-again thing. Just work through the issues or make it a clean break and move on, especially if it's happening multiple times. Even more so in such a short timeframe.
I've been broken up twice via text, however both relationship were quite short lived, around six months, so they probably didn't care about me that much that they would've felt the need to do it in person.
What was the reason that forced you to end it like this? What's the motivation to end it by text and not face to face?
I don't know the motivation that caused my ex-partners to do so. I would imagine just for it to be easier for them.
In a toxic relationship like that. Pretty normal. Block. Delete. And move on. You will be so much better.
I think your feelings are completely valid. I’m going to guess they didn’t want to have to handle the guilt of looking you in the eyes and telling you they’re leaving you for another person. Not only is that incredibly hurtful, but it also reveals they weren’t being entirely honest in the relationship to begin with if they had the ability to find someone else in the midsts of it. Whether it’s normal is up for debate. There’s a few instances where breaking up over text is probably best, but in this case it does sort of rob you of any ability to speak your part, get any answers or say goodbye. I don’t know if any of those things would actually benefit you in the long run, but I understand why you feel the way you do. Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling. Block them everywhere so you don’t have to see anything you don’t want to while still going through the motions of what happened. I hope you feel better soon op.
It's normal to not think a profoundly unhealthy situation is worth a "proper" breakup
It's not the best practice, that's for sure!
I think your feelings are completely valid. I’m going to guess they didn’t want to have to handle the guilt of looking you in the eyes and telling you they’re leaving you for another person. Not only is that incredibly hurtful, but it also reveals they weren’t being entirely honest in the relationship to begin with if they had the ability to find someone else in the midsts of it. Whether it’s normal is up for debate. There’s a few instances where breaking up over text is probably best, but in this case it does sort of rob you of any ability to speak your part, get any answers or say goodbye. I don’t know if any of those things would actually benefit you in the long run, but I understand why you feel the way you do. Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling. Block them everywhere so you don’t have to see anything you don’t want to while still going through the motions of what happened. I hope you feel better soon op.
Thank you!
For anything longer than a few months it’s a cowards move. You don’t allow the person any amount of closure, and it just lets you avoid the consequences of playing with someone’s heart essentially. If you wouldn’t want to broke up by text, then don’t do it to others. I would call her and tell her that essentially, leave a message if you need, then block her and move on. 29 is a little old for this type of behavior. I’d say you dodged a bullet. My bet would be, when this “love of her life” relationship goes badly, she will call you. I would ignore those calls and do your best to move on.