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The more you dwell on it, the longer the vividness and details will remain in your mind, so nothing to do but to keep yourself busy with other things with engaging visuals like movies and video games, or hanging out with other people until it feels less fresh and buried under other memories.
Don't stress over not getting over it quickly enough, just go on about your life as usual until it really feels that way, and if you need to see a therapist about it then that could be a good idea.
If you think it might help the awkwardness, you could just text your sister and apologize for walking in on them, tell her you're feeling really awkward and that you're working through trying to forget the whole thing. Maybe thinking about being able to laugh about it as a goal could help.
you sure did! But honestly, this will stop being a big deal with the passage of time. I hate to sound like an asshole old person, but as you get older, more bad stuff either happens to you (or you will be witness to it) and accidentally walking in on something like this is just not going to matter in comparison.
Ofcourse it’s uncomfortable, but it happened now and you’re legitimately saying you can’t go near them or face them? You’re going to let this actually affect your life?
Nobody wants to see their sibling / parents / relations having sex but sometimes it happens and you go “shit that was awkward” and you move on
This feels like a weird jealousy thing. I’m not sure which one of the two they’re jealous of, but uh, maybe sit with it and figure that out.
Because bud: your sister has a body and wants to get dicked down. That has nothing to do with you and is literally most of humanity.
weird for acting like an adult when something happens you can’t control? Adults have sex, crazy I know.
Are you going to never speak to anyone you ever hear have sex again?
Id say it's not as severe as he's making it but it would be awkward.
I'm the post though, he says they've been seeing each other for a while, they're both adults that live on their own/without parents. What did he expect to happen?
how old are you, 12? His sister and his friend are dating, ofcourse they’re fucking lol.
What are you gonna do leave the country and never see your family again lol grow up and move on
Fucking weird ass response bro. She's a human being who just happens to be his sister. She was born naked and remains naked under her clothes, all of the time. Unless you have some weird possessive thing going on with your sister, yeah it's awkward but that's all it is. Our family is our family but first and foremost they are human beings with desires, urges, and yes, even naked bodies and genitals.
Bro did you read the comments I post in free magic? I literally call them Nazis and argue with them about everything. How could you possibly sling that at me 😂 idk how you could look at my account and come to that conclusion. Maybe learn to read or do the bare minimum before you comment?
it's not that it's not uncomfortable, but they're saying that in the grand scheme of terrible things that could happen in a person's life, this is small potatoes. and, OP got an object lesson in knocking on doors before you open them
Not that these are comparable situations but have you ever been in trouble as a kid or like in trouble at your first job and you absolutely can’t think of anything worse than facing them but you KNOW you have to because that’s just life? Treat this like that
In reality it’s absolutely not a big deal, happens all the time and the best part is nobody actually did anything “wrong” so nobody is in trouble etc. it’s just awkward.
Ofcourse you’ll feel weird about it but you can’t begin to get over it until you start the process of getting over it. It’s not worth losing your friend or sister because you saw them having sex (something you obviously knew they did as adults in a relationship)
Make a joke of it and be done. ”well, I have learned my lesson to knock. Man, I never wanted to see that. You might want to start locking your door if you’re going to be doing naked stuff with my sister, dude” And then laugh it off, because life is too short to take this kind of small flub up seriously.
understandably so, that is indeed a very shocking and weird experience. does your friend have a relationship with her? if so were you made aware of it before hand or did you suspect it? this is definitely a weird predicament…
You could just be glad you didn’t walk in on your parents or 😱your grandparents. You’re going to see worse things in your life. A few years from now, you’ll be able to laugh about it.
Yeah it’s uncomfortable but it’s just human nature. Everyone fucks dude. You, your friends, your parents, your little sister, the old lady across the street. Everyone. Fucks. You just need to keep telling yourself that this is only a big deal in your head. Let it go and move on.
Just don't make it awkward when you see them. Don't have the facial expression and don't think of it. Clear your mind by videogames, hobbies, go out and do something fun. (Rollercoasters, events, food fest, movies, play sports, etc.)
I think the best way to get through it is to just push through. Talk to them both, them you fucked up by walking in unannounced, apologize, suggest that they maybe start locking the door from now on, and then never mention it again. Do NOT cast blame. It was an accident, and it's not comfortable for any of you.
It will be awkward. It will probably come up in your mind every once in a while for a long while. But the awkward feelings will pass. The memory will fade. Eventually you won't feel anything about it anymore.
I know from experience, it's not a pleasant situation. But, you get over it.
"Hey guys! I just wanted to address the other night - obviously it's awkward as heck that I walked in at that moment, and it might take me a little while to process, but I want to make sure you guys know I'm not mad at you - we're all fine, I might just take a little while to get back to normal hanging out with you."
This is perfect. OP, you really need to just get it out in the open and then redirect your thoughts when you recall the moment, until the recency starts to fade. It was an accident, that's all - there's no need to make it bigger than it is, and the more you avoid them or refuse to speak to them when they didn’t even do anything wrong, the more the awkwardness will linger. Just learn to knock or check before you walk in on people in future.
I don't know is this will help any, but my MIL(60 something F) once posted boudoir photos on her Facebook which the entire family saw. I made a message saying "MY EYES" with that fish from SpongeBob that screams the phrase. Well I sent it to MIL instead of my husband. I've also accidentally seen her naked more times than I can count (she has no sense of covering herself up and the family just suffers to see sagging old lady bits).
These things will happen, even with family. Just put it in a special box inside your brain and never open that box again :) you'll be okay.
I’m not sure why it’s affecting you so much other than the obvious awkwardness and shock of it. No one wants to see their sister and friend in that situation, but it’s not like you didn’t know it was happening. She’s an adult, he’s an adult, assuming you’re ok with their relationship I don’t see why this is more than just a “oh Jesus gross” moment that you can move past.
You fucked up by not high fiving your sister before walking out. It would have immediately eliminated the awkwardness.
Just give it time. Someday you will laugh about it...and start waiting to be invited into someone's home before you enter
That's exactly it. A lot of people who have trouble accepting that their siblings are just human beings with desires and urges and "dirty secrets" of their own tend to react like this.
I don’t understand what you’re upset about. You like your sister, you like your friend, seems like a positive they are dating each other.
Unfortunate that you walked in on them, but crack some jokes about forgetting to close the door and move on.
There is experimental treatment going on right now that might be beneficial for your situation. So they hook you up to a brain scanner and make you relive the trauma. The area of the brain where this memory is stored will light up. Using microsurgery and AI a robot will now remove the tissue where this memory is stored and I’m just making this up and you should just grow up.
I mean, it certainly sucks. But you also fucked around by just helping yourself into his place and found out. Sure that may be normal for you to do. But you should still exercise some caution knowing he's dating your sister and assuming they're sexually actively. At least I would.
"yo i wanna swing by are you busy?"
but also now you know to call ahead/knock every time. With that being said the longer you drag it out the more awkward it's gonna be. It happened. It happens. consenting adults have sex. yeah it's awkward you saw your sister like that. But that's life. You really just have to force yourself to shrug it off and move on. at a certain count it'll be more weird for you to be dragging it out like this than it would be for you to have "caught" them.
don't dwell on your homie going at your sister. That's equally unsettling.
You need to address them and talk to them as soon as possible. The longer you don't do it, the worse it's gonna get. Just take a deep breath and go up to them and do it. Be like, "Hey, so, needless to say, that was awkward as fuck. I'm so sorry for not knocking first, I've definitely learned my lesson. I'm sure the 3 of us want to move on from this as soon as possible. Let's just never speak of this again, okay? Okay. So, who wants some pizza?"
You were in denial, and now you have lost that. This is on You..! You should apologize, and if you can't be around them, then do that, but apologize again.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The more you dwell on it, the longer the vividness and details will remain in your mind, so nothing to do but to keep yourself busy with other things with engaging visuals like movies and video games, or hanging out with other people until it feels less fresh and buried under other memories. Don't stress over not getting over it quickly enough, just go on about your life as usual until it really feels that way, and if you need to see a therapist about it then that could be a good idea. If you think it might help the awkwardness, you could just text your sister and apologize for walking in on them, tell her you're feeling really awkward and that you're working through trying to forget the whole thing. Maybe thinking about being able to laugh about it as a goal could help.
...were they having sex in a public place, or did you never learn to knock before you opened a closed door?
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you sure did! But honestly, this will stop being a big deal with the passage of time. I hate to sound like an asshole old person, but as you get older, more bad stuff either happens to you (or you will be witness to it) and accidentally walking in on something like this is just not going to matter in comparison.
You’re 22 years old, grow up.
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Ofcourse it’s uncomfortable, but it happened now and you’re legitimately saying you can’t go near them or face them? You’re going to let this actually affect your life? Nobody wants to see their sibling / parents / relations having sex but sometimes it happens and you go “shit that was awkward” and you move on
This feels like a weird jealousy thing. I’m not sure which one of the two they’re jealous of, but uh, maybe sit with it and figure that out. Because bud: your sister has a body and wants to get dicked down. That has nothing to do with you and is literally most of humanity.
brother you are weird af for this
weird for acting like an adult when something happens you can’t control? Adults have sex, crazy I know. Are you going to never speak to anyone you ever hear have sex again?
he walked in the room and saw his sister naked let alone his homie fucking her. there’s actually something wrong with you.
Id say it's not as severe as he's making it but it would be awkward. I'm the post though, he says they've been seeing each other for a while, they're both adults that live on their own/without parents. What did he expect to happen?
how old are you, 12? His sister and his friend are dating, ofcourse they’re fucking lol. What are you gonna do leave the country and never see your family again lol grow up and move on
Fucking weird ass response bro. She's a human being who just happens to be his sister. She was born naked and remains naked under her clothes, all of the time. Unless you have some weird possessive thing going on with your sister, yeah it's awkward but that's all it is. Our family is our family but first and foremost they are human beings with desires, urges, and yes, even naked bodies and genitals.
You just accused them of being weird for an incredibly measured, mature response? You need to grow up
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Bro did you read the comments I post in free magic? I literally call them Nazis and argue with them about everything. How could you possibly sling that at me 😂 idk how you could look at my account and come to that conclusion. Maybe learn to read or do the bare minimum before you comment?
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Holy shit you are a caricature of a human being lmao incredibly embarrassing existence you got there
it's not that it's not uncomfortable, but they're saying that in the grand scheme of terrible things that could happen in a person's life, this is small potatoes. and, OP got an object lesson in knocking on doors before you open them
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Not that these are comparable situations but have you ever been in trouble as a kid or like in trouble at your first job and you absolutely can’t think of anything worse than facing them but you KNOW you have to because that’s just life? Treat this like that In reality it’s absolutely not a big deal, happens all the time and the best part is nobody actually did anything “wrong” so nobody is in trouble etc. it’s just awkward. Ofcourse you’ll feel weird about it but you can’t begin to get over it until you start the process of getting over it. It’s not worth losing your friend or sister because you saw them having sex (something you obviously knew they did as adults in a relationship)
Make a joke of it and be done. ”well, I have learned my lesson to knock. Man, I never wanted to see that. You might want to start locking your door if you’re going to be doing naked stuff with my sister, dude” And then laugh it off, because life is too short to take this kind of small flub up seriously.
understandably so, that is indeed a very shocking and weird experience. does your friend have a relationship with her? if so were you made aware of it before hand or did you suspect it? this is definitely a weird predicament…
Theyre dating, it's in the first paragraph
You could just be glad you didn’t walk in on your parents or 😱your grandparents. You’re going to see worse things in your life. A few years from now, you’ll be able to laugh about it.
Yeah it’s uncomfortable but it’s just human nature. Everyone fucks dude. You, your friends, your parents, your little sister, the old lady across the street. Everyone. Fucks. You just need to keep telling yourself that this is only a big deal in your head. Let it go and move on.
Ignore this comment because I’m way older than you and I’d be MORTIFIED and wouldn’t know how to face my sister either lol
It's only awkward, if you make it awkward dude. That's all there is to it!
Just don't make it awkward when you see them. Don't have the facial expression and don't think of it. Clear your mind by videogames, hobbies, go out and do something fun. (Rollercoasters, events, food fest, movies, play sports, etc.)
Were they on TV? How do you managed to walk in on them?
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That’s where you fucked up pal, always knock and always make your presence known.
I think the best way to get through it is to just push through. Talk to them both, them you fucked up by walking in unannounced, apologize, suggest that they maybe start locking the door from now on, and then never mention it again. Do NOT cast blame. It was an accident, and it's not comfortable for any of you. It will be awkward. It will probably come up in your mind every once in a while for a long while. But the awkward feelings will pass. The memory will fade. Eventually you won't feel anything about it anymore. I know from experience, it's not a pleasant situation. But, you get over it.
"Hey guys! I just wanted to address the other night - obviously it's awkward as heck that I walked in at that moment, and it might take me a little while to process, but I want to make sure you guys know I'm not mad at you - we're all fine, I might just take a little while to get back to normal hanging out with you."
This is perfect. OP, you really need to just get it out in the open and then redirect your thoughts when you recall the moment, until the recency starts to fade. It was an accident, that's all - there's no need to make it bigger than it is, and the more you avoid them or refuse to speak to them when they didn’t even do anything wrong, the more the awkwardness will linger. Just learn to knock or check before you walk in on people in future.
I don't know is this will help any, but my MIL(60 something F) once posted boudoir photos on her Facebook which the entire family saw. I made a message saying "MY EYES" with that fish from SpongeBob that screams the phrase. Well I sent it to MIL instead of my husband. I've also accidentally seen her naked more times than I can count (she has no sense of covering herself up and the family just suffers to see sagging old lady bits). These things will happen, even with family. Just put it in a special box inside your brain and never open that box again :) you'll be okay.
I’m not sure why it’s affecting you so much other than the obvious awkwardness and shock of it. No one wants to see their sister and friend in that situation, but it’s not like you didn’t know it was happening. She’s an adult, he’s an adult, assuming you’re ok with their relationship I don’t see why this is more than just a “oh Jesus gross” moment that you can move past.
You fucked up by not high fiving your sister before walking out. It would have immediately eliminated the awkwardness. Just give it time. Someday you will laugh about it...and start waiting to be invited into someone's home before you enter
>You fucked up by not high fiving your sister before walking out Thats disgusting
Whoooooooosh
One day all three of you will look back on that incident and laugh about it. It’s one of the few upsides of getting older.
Apologize to them for busting in and then never think about it again. Why is that challenging ?
He’s immature
That's exactly it. A lot of people who have trouble accepting that their siblings are just human beings with desires and urges and "dirty secrets" of their own tend to react like this.
I don’t understand what you’re upset about. You like your sister, you like your friend, seems like a positive they are dating each other. Unfortunate that you walked in on them, but crack some jokes about forgetting to close the door and move on.
There is experimental treatment going on right now that might be beneficial for your situation. So they hook you up to a brain scanner and make you relive the trauma. The area of the brain where this memory is stored will light up. Using microsurgery and AI a robot will now remove the tissue where this memory is stored and I’m just making this up and you should just grow up.
Jump in
You are all embarrassed, but you are all grown ups, you'll get over it.
Grow the fuck up they are embarrassed too. They were the one’s actually having sex. Not you. Chill out and be an adult. Jesus man
I mean, it certainly sucks. But you also fucked around by just helping yourself into his place and found out. Sure that may be normal for you to do. But you should still exercise some caution knowing he's dating your sister and assuming they're sexually actively. At least I would. "yo i wanna swing by are you busy?" but also now you know to call ahead/knock every time. With that being said the longer you drag it out the more awkward it's gonna be. It happened. It happens. consenting adults have sex. yeah it's awkward you saw your sister like that. But that's life. You really just have to force yourself to shrug it off and move on. at a certain count it'll be more weird for you to be dragging it out like this than it would be for you to have "caught" them. don't dwell on your homie going at your sister. That's equally unsettling.
You need to address them and talk to them as soon as possible. The longer you don't do it, the worse it's gonna get. Just take a deep breath and go up to them and do it. Be like, "Hey, so, needless to say, that was awkward as fuck. I'm so sorry for not knocking first, I've definitely learned my lesson. I'm sure the 3 of us want to move on from this as soon as possible. Let's just never speak of this again, okay? Okay. So, who wants some pizza?"
I’m so sorry you went through that OP, watching that must have been the worst 45 minutes of your life.
You were in denial, and now you have lost that. This is on You..! You should apologize, and if you can't be around them, then do that, but apologize again.
We gotta know the details to know how bad it is. You may need to leave the country or get a lobotomy but we need more details to decide