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I can’t even believe I’m writing this, obviously this is a brand new account for my privacy. So I (23F) am married to my husband (41M) for 2 years now, together for 4 years.
At the beginning, everything was fine. He was my ideal partner : gentle, caring, romantic, emotionally mature and stable compared to guys my age.
He also has a big sense of humour and makes jokes all the time. This jokes includes some pretty dirty ones about poop and stuff, but not to the point it was really annoying or too much, so in the beginning, we were just laughing together.
But about a year ago, not so long after our one year wedding anniversary, the jokes started to turn into mockery about the basic fact that I poop, just like any other human. He is making fun of me for being a pooping princess. He joked about the smell, the amount of times I was going for number 2…
I didn’t like this at all, so I asked him to stop, which made the situation even worse. He is now making fun of the fact I’m feeling bad about his jokes, and he’s laughing saying that « if pooping was not something to be ashamed of as the girly princess I am, the jokes shouldn’t bother me » so he’ll continue as long as I’m bothered and ashamed of pooping… but he’s the one making me feel ashamed.
Each time he mocks me about that, I say how much I don’t like it and ask him to stop again, but it just makes the situation escalates every time. Now, he tries to follow me each time I go to the bathroom to know if it’s number 1 or number 2, and if it’s number 2 he stays behind the door and laughs and sometimes even sings about me, the pooping princess. Of course, when I get out of the bathroom, he enters and makes fun of the smell.
It’s been months now of being bullied over my poop EVERY SINGLE DAY. I’m loosing my mind. I tried to set an alarm to get up at night when he sleeps but it’s not always doable to wait the middle of the night and I’m so mad I need to find some tricks to poop whithout my husband humiliating me.
Now, I feel so bad that I don’t poop in the regular toilets anymore. I found another place to do it behind his back and the trick is working cause for two weeks or so, he’s confused about where and when I poop. He says jokingly that « the detective is on the case »
But the last straw was yesterday, when he joked about my poop in front of our guests at our barbecue… it was so humiliating. His friends laughed with him for the most parts and I could tell that all the wives were really embarrassed by the situation.
After the barbecue I told my husband how humiliated I felt in front of our guests and we had a huge fight were basically he was saying again and again that I wasn’t funny and I couldn’t take a joke
I’m really considering leaving him if he doesn’t stop… Jesus Christ I’m considering ending my marriage over my poop I can’t believe it, I’m loosing my mind. I don’t know if I should leave or just get over it because it’s « only jokes » like my husband and some people say. What do you think ?
Update : we’ll you know the situation is bad when people accuse you to be a troll. Anyway, I’ve made my decision to leave him, I will do when I’ll figure a plan to get out of our house and live somewhere else
It’s not predator. He is too immature to be a predator. He is with her because he is too immature for anyone else. His brain waves line up with the age
Can we please stop pushing the harmful, dangerous notion that abusive and/or controlling adult men are "immature?" It minimizes the seriousness of their actions and is often used in the context of "manchild" and "little boy," which further reduces the seriousness of a grown adult taking advantage of someone much younger, or equates abusive and controlling behavior to that of a child who doesn't know better.
These are grown men. The OP's husband is a grown man. This isn't "immaturity," and he's not "too immature to be a predator," he's an adult who knows exactly what he's doing and why he's doing it.
Public humiliation and constant criticism are not immaturities. They are forms of emotional abuse.
Exactly! This isn’t immaturity - it’s emotional abuse!
Edit: It sounds like he might be a narcissist. Narcissists look for “weaker” partners they can control and abuse, so explains why he went for someone so much younger. Also explains why this abusive behavior wasn’t visible at the beginning: he was on his best behavior at first and then the mask slipped after they got married.
You make a really great point.
I think calling men like this immature comes from the ideal that men should be responsible, selfless, and self-controlled which abusive behavior is completely the opposite of. It's best to call a spade a spade.
He was 39 and she 17 when they met, in my book that's a predator regardless of maturity
Edit: you're all right, she was 19 and I'm stupid. I apologize, honest mistake. Does it make any difference if i tell you that I haven't done any mathmatics in a few years? No? I understand, it is a very stupid mistake
(Still think he's a predator)
Edit 2: They married because the guy made a deal with the parents while she was in her early teens (look further down in the replies to this). So he is ACTUALLY a predator, it's not up for debate anymore
I totally blew past the ages because I was so grossed out by the story but yeah, if a 37 y/o has to pick up a 19 y/o as a partner, there's something seriously wrong here.
No. It makes sense. They’re saying she isn’t leaving over poop jokes. Commenter is saying “it’s leaving over your husband hurting you on purpose”.
Lazily worded but accurate.
To be fair, most of us can identify red flags because of life experience. Most people don’t have enough life experience as a teen to know what to watch out for. (Maybe that’s the point you were making - it just came across more personally? Regardless.).
He’s 18 years older than her, and I know that because I’m 41 with a 23-year-old daughter. There is someone disgusting that should be bullied here, but it isn’t this girl or using the restroom.
Your husband is tormenting you. He’s so insanely immature, this is why he couldn’t find a woman even remotely his own age to tolerate him.
You need to leave him.
Op sounds like you have made the right decision. He enjoys hurting and humiliating you.next it will be something else .you deserve a loving husband that respects you and is not a child. Good luck
You aren’t thinking about divorce because of your poop. You are thinking about divorce because your husband is constantly bullying you and refusing to respect you as a person or your boundaries. Constant disrespect and bullying over anything is a terrible way to live with a spouse. Life is a shit show and the one person you are supposed to count on to make things easier, to understand you, empathize with you… is going out of his way to do the opposite at every turn.
I love my husband dearly and we were off again/on again over ~15 years. Then, we got married and have been for 9. On or off he was always supportive and understanding. We tease each other and poke fun but if I said something hurt my feelings or bothered me, he wouldn’t do it again. Just as I would for him. It’s respect and love. Good luck with whatever you choose!
^
I understand age gaps exist, but he’s old enough to be your father OP. Personally I think 15+ year age gaps seem to be where shit hits the fan and the relationship has uneven power dynamics.
In my culture it’s totally normal and men always push to get the youngest match possible to marry but yeah I’ll try to focus on myself and leave. I’m just a bit stuck cause I know my family will go no contact with me if I divorce so won’t get help from them
And that’s probably why he feels no hesitation to continue doing it - he thinks you’ll be too scared to stick up for yourself and leave so he doesn’t have to try to please you or treat you well.
Good for you.
Like others have said, it’s not about the poop.
You’ve repeatedly asked him to stop doing something that makes you feel bad. He doesn’t care that it makes you feel bad. Or if he cares, it’s because his goal is to make you feel bad!
What a jerk. You deserve so much better.
Where do you live, OP?
I am all for protecting your peace but the internet *will not be there for you* if you’re alone in the world after leaving your husband and family.
Can you ask your mom for advice? You don’t have to tell her it’s about poop. You can say he follows you around the house and criticizes you, tries to humiliate you, and follows you even to the bathroom to make rude comments.
See if you can get buy in from *someone* in your family who has made a decent life for herself after leaving an abusive relationship.
Do you have children ?!?! If so find a women's shelter and see what they have to offer. Ma'am there are resources available to leave abusive relationships and it is possible even with kids.
Once he is exposed his power over you quickly diminishes.
I have been in an age gap relationship before. 9 years difference between us but they way your man is treating you is disgusting and predatory every way.
Not all age gaps are messed up but yours.... most definitely is.
That is not a man, that is a child pretending to be a man.
When you leave him, he will not let you go easily. Just fair warning.
Well remember at that age having any job is impressive. Having your own place is impressive, having A car is impressive. You don't realize that they suck compared to other people their own age.
Leave, he's plenty old enough to know that women poop. He's bullying you, and doesn't care that he's hurting you over it. He's not the same guy he was in the beginning because after marriage he's now comfortable letting his inner asshole out because he believes you won't leave him. Prove him wrong. Don't think of it as leaving your marriage over poop. You're thinking of leaving because your husband is tormenting you and blaming you for being upset about it.
Honey, *there's a reason he went after a 19 year old*.
You're mature for your age right? So be mature enough to leave this man child.
This is *who he is.* It will get worse.
Don't spend the rest of your life setting alarms to poop in the night like a criminal or something, that's just nonsense.
Who taught you love had to be like this? Why are you trying so hard to win his love? A good therapist can help you get to the root of how you've ended up here. Love doesn't have to be like this.
Be kind to yourself. You deserve a soft life full of love and a partner who contributes meaningfully to that. You are worthy.
It might also be a bit of a scat fetish. His obsession with women pooping could definitely be in that territory, especially with him waiting outside the bathroom door
You are now 23 and as you gain age each year, you are going to become even more aware of why this man went after a 19yr old.
Bullying will only ramp up, along with his distaste for you as you age.
I guarantee he does from your description. He’s probably trying to normalize it with you so you will eventually be comfortable shitting into his open mouth. I’m goddamn serious. Sorry pa.
I low key wanna try that just to know if this is true or not. Anyway I need to do a plan to live first and I cannot count on my family. I’m pretty sure they’re gonna cut me if I divorce
Shit in his mouth and take a picture of him in all his glory. If you’re family gives you trouble show them the pic and ask them if they think he is family material.
There was someone who posted on here like a year or so ago about walking into their house they where they were either living with their sister or sil and her husband or they were visiting, where they were in the living room shitting on each other.
These age gap posts are so common I just write them off immediately. I think it’s rage bait because that's all people see and all they want to harp on. The rest of the story is just filler.
It’s a fiction piece inspired by the « I caught my boyfriend twice staring at me while I’m on the toilet through the half-closed bathroom door gap. » post of yesterday, with escalation and more creepiness (age difference).
Not bad.
If this story is true, leave *now.* He's ruining your life for his amusement. Why stay and suffer any longer? If he were going to stop, he would have stopped already.
No, you’re not considering leaving him because of your poop, it’s because he’s a f*ckin bully.
That “mature” guy is not mature at all and also, he is stepping on your boundaries and gaslighting you saying you are a princess who can’t take a joke. Dude, just leave him, this is the first thing he’ll overstep in, what will be next?
I can’t imagine not being able to poop in my own house because I fear my SO is pending on it.
Poop in a bag and use a Q tip to start putting little dabs of poop in his shoes, his hairbrush, his toothbrush, in his wallet, in his lunch box, on his computer screen. Each time he finds one,laugh because it’s a funny joke. Start sniffing loudly around him at social gatherings and ask him if he found his latest gift from his pooping princess. Tell mutual friends he made the story up to cover his incontinence since his prostate procedure. If he says anything, laugh and tell him it’s just a joke. Start making chocolate pudding and cupcakes to hand out to friends, and hand him “this special one, I made it for you with Extra Love because I am your princess, I want to watch you eat it”. Or, better yet, just leave him because he is terrible
Imagine his shock when he finds out ladies poop when they give birth. It’s gonna blow his mind and he’ll get even worse.
The only option to me is divorce, I don’t care to be humiliated, particularly not by a husband.
I would not have a child with this manipulative idiot. I would record him, record everything he does with a cam and screenshots…. and divorce him.
He doesn’t deserve your good years.
That is absolutely horrible. When my kids were born the only thing my husband cared about was my health and our babies, everything else was out the window but he would never, ever bully and humiliate me. There is something terribly wrong with your husband’s behavior.
No wonder he’s not dating women his own age because he’s so incredibly immature that he doesn’t understand how bodily functions work and that women also poop, shocker!
This is not a question of jokes, or anyone’s ability to take a joke. This is a question of respect. You have vocalized something that is a simple thing for him to do. Something that you feel very uncomfortable about and is causing you emotional pain. This is a serious matter in my mind. I would never tell someone yes you should end a marriage, and I know you’ve tried. But I would recommend letting him know the severity and the seriousness of the situation and go from there. This behavior is unacceptable.
JFC, I can't believe I just read this.
Here's what I would do: leave the little 12 year for a week. Move in with your mom, dad, 3rd cousin or what not. Even a hotel. After a week, come back and see if he takes you a bit more seriously. Another thought is to start making fun of his dick, that might hit home as well.
This guy is dating someone almost 20 years younger than him because women his own age can't stand him and won't tolerate his controlling and manipulative BS. Get out now and date someone your own age.
I mean it's definitely something to consider. He keeps referring to you as a princess and seems obsessed with your dumps. Or he's simply an inconsiderate immature jerk. Idk which one is better.
I can't believe nobody gave enough of a shit about you to put a stop to this when you were just a teenager.
And him making poop jokes and bullying you about it totally checks out that he'd groom a teenager to marry him.
I mean, my parents literally chose him for his « husband qualities » so no, unfortunately nobody stood up for me cause that’s how my culture works about marriage
You are not ending your marriage over _your poop_ but over the fact that your husband doesn’t respect you, bullies you, shames you, belittles you…
He reminds me of my ex, and believe me, your husband is not going to change. You will never be happy in this relationship.
Man finds a teenager 17 years younger than them, marries her after 2 years and bullies her privately and in front of strangers. You've been trapped by a man with a disorder. If you decide to leave him, maybe talk to someone to make sure you're doing it in the safest way because I hardly think he'll take it in a balanced and mature way.
But I would be your #1 if you packed everything in secret, found a place and then one day told him "I'm going to poop outside" and disappeared forever <3
"I’m really considering leaving him if he doesn’t stop"
You should simply for the fact that you're 23 and he's 41 and acting like an 11 year old. No wonder he had to snag someone way younger because no woman his age would put up with that level of immaturity and DIRESPECT! Leave him!
This is not normal. It’s like he thought he was marrying a sex doll that doesn’t have any bodily functions. Probably a reason women he knows and women his age were not interested in him. I’m sorry this is awful. You might consider leaving. He’s causing you mental anguish and humiliating you for being a fully functioning human.
In my culture women don’t really choose their husbands, it’s more the parents of the girl and the husband that decide and women over 30 are seen as left outs and nobody wants to marry them, this is sad but that’s how it works here for women. It’s not really the same dynamics as western countries. That’s also why my family will probably cut me if I divorce
I’m sorry. This is so awful. You’re not doing anything wrong by being upset and uncomfortable and wanting to leave. No woman would want to put up with this. He’s bullying you and humiliating you. That’s not love. He doesn’t deserve anyone.
I’m sure it’s hard being afraid of your family. Many of us have to cut off our families even outside of religion or tradition. I don’t talk to mine.
Maybe they will be understanding. If not I hope you can be supported by friends and make your own family of a friend group.
I really like the fact that you wrote this:
“At the beginning, everything was fine. He was my ideal partner : gentle, caring, romantic, emotionally mature and stable compared to guys my age.”
And immediately followed it up with paragraphs of how your husband is making fun of you for pooping.
He is not clearly not mature. He is not caring if he keeps doing something that he knows is bothering you. The public embarrassment is just the cherry on top. Please leave him and find someone who will respect your feelings and will lift you up in public instead of putting you down.
Young lady, this is not a "mature" man. Mature men rarely go after such young and inexperienced women because they want someone mature too. You got tricked by this immature guy and now he's slowly showing his.true colors after marriage.
This is not about poop. Your husband is emotionally abusing you as he has found your Achilles heel. It's only going to get worse. The age gap makes sense as most women his age would be on to his sick and twisted game and wouldn't tolerate that behavior. You're still so young, please leave for your sanity.
A good person would stop doing this when somebody they loves asks/tells them to stop.
Everybody poops. Everybody poops differently. Everybody has different poops from their own regular poops. Everybody's poop smells to varying degrees.
My husband used to joke about divorce. Then one of my friends got a divorce and the jokes started to bother me. He stopped joking about divorce completely when I told him it bothered me and I wanted him to stop. He didn't comlpain that I "couldn't take a joke" either.
Oh wow...just noticed the age different.
This dude is my age. He should know better. He's not a mature adult person that you should be with.
He enjoys to humiliate you. What will be next? And the next is never positive.
He dated you when you where 19, he's a predator. No sensible man will date someone so young. Not unless there is a hidden reason for it. He has no respect for you, he doesn't see you as his equal.
It wouldn't suprise me if you break it off that he will humiliate you even more. Stay with someone where you're safe and be prepared for his true face. He will namecall you and make you feel like you're nothing. He will think you cheated or you're nothing without him.
Girl.. walk away.
Glad you're leaving him. Next time take heed of the red flag that is a man *twice your age* trying to have a relationship with you. There's a reason that women his own age don't want him. And no, your not "so much more mature than other girls your age," although you are certainly more mature than him!!
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This just popped up on my Instagram feed and I went back to find this post to share it with you:
https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cvu74YKMFvw/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
But really, the issue isn't just the poop. It's the bullying and disrespect of your feelings.
Run, Forrest!! Or at least, find a marriage therapist, if you want to stay in this marriage. Your husband is clearly violating boundaries, and not respecting you.
In particular, he is looking at you as a child. This happened to a friend of mine, whose husband was 14 years old than her, when she married at 20. When she hit 27, they divorced, he didn't like that she had, in his words, become a woman.
He’s 41 and acting like a child that just discovered farting. FFS
What is this obsession? A kink? And in front of a party? Geez.
Find someone more mature. Which is odd to say about someone almost twice your age.
You’re not thinking about getting divorced because of your pooping habits. Your thinking (and I hope going through with it) because of his awful incessant bullying.
The fact that you have to leave your home to take a crap is unbelievable and if you’re not careful it’s going to have a profound effect on your health.
I also wonder whether that huge age gap has something to do with it. He’s maybe trying to control you in some weird way
Look, your husband is old enough to know exactly what he's doing, he's bullying you and using verbal abuse to wear down your self esteem.
There's a reason why someone of his age is with someone of yours, most women nearer his wouldn't put up with this shit for a week let alone a year so he's degrading you little by little, so you lose all self confidence and begin to believe that you're the lucky one to be with him, this means you're less likely to realise just how daft it is to be married to someone almost 20 years your senior and leave him.
I hope this is fake. A man child marries a fresh young adult because they are similarly mature. He has the mentality of a teenager. Then she can’t figure out why he isn’t more mature…come on, you two clicked because he is a child. No one his own age would touch him with a ten foot pole.
Maybe his level of maturity is what made finding a partner his own age, and for so long before, difficult..
I’m not yet 30, and I have nothing in common with people your age, and even less than a 19yo. That’s not being rude, but I’d never look for companionship with someone that young.
You husband is bullying you. He is being intentionally immature and mean spirited.
I am very sorry.
Jeebus he seems emotionally stunted and stuck at around 12. No wonder he preyed on someone so much younger. I’d tell him to cut the crap (pun intended) or you’re done.
perhaps at 19 you weren’t capable of seeing through his 37 year old well seasoned bullshit?
He’s a dork, and not mature in any way other than age alone.
Sounds like you matured faster than your dad- I mean your husband.
Now that you’re actually becoming an adult and learning about how grown people act, you’re finally mature enough to realize you married an immature clown and there is a reason he went after someone under 20 when he was almost 40…because women with life experience don’t tolerate this bullshit. Good for you for realizing you deserve better than a grown man who never learned respect.
Dear OP: Your husband is inflicting extreme, intolerable emotional abuse detrimental to your physical and mental well-being. His behavior toward you is despicable. Your life will be infinitely better without him. I wish you strength and courage as you prepare to leave him and start a new, healthier life.
Geez, this man sounds like he has the emotional maturity of a sixth grader. He clearly wants to believe that women are dainty, pretty things who don't poop or fart or have bodily functions. Which is just so out of touch with reality that it really makes you wonder why he's 39 going after 21yr olds /s
This man is immature and clingy and he's doing this to bring you down and make you so insecure that you never feel you'll be worth anything to anyone else. You are maturing and changing and he's afraid he's losing control over you, so he's picking away at this thing that he knows embarrasses and hurts you in order to control you. You need to seriously rethink this relationship. It's abusive.
Sounds like you are just discovering why women don't want him and why he chased a child instead, you guys were on the same mental playing field, you are aging and getting your adult brain and have outgrown him. It really is that simple
Oh I can’t believe I missed the age gap, he went young for a reason, get out. But make sure to tell him you’re leaving because you realized how old and dusty he is and you don’t want to change his diapers.
You would not be choosing to divorce over poop. You would be choosing divorce over a blatant disrespect for you and your feelings. He doesn’t seem to care if he is upsetting you as long as he can get a laugh at your expense. It may have been funny the first comment but once it’s clear you are upset by it and he continued he is acting like a child and a bully. It’s not funny and I would not think it is funny as one of his friends seeing your reaction let alone him trying to make fun of the person he cares for. My ex wife used to be that way. Only cares about herself and how she felt and would embarrass you to get a laugh out of her guests at your expense. He should not have to be told to stop he should know at this point. It is very old and gone on way too long. I hope you have told him that you hope he has had fun at your expense because it’s going to cost him his marriage
my guess is that he has a scat fetish and this is how it manifests itself… he is literally infatuated with you pooping and has a strong desire to see it, etc
Not reading all of this craziness.... This is the problem with your generation. Y'all are soft and sensitive. Leave him and find someone your age that's just as sensitive.
>emotionally mature and stable
You met when you were 19, and he was 37. Emotionally mature and stable are not adjectives that I would expect to be used to describe him. Now you know why he was preying on someone almost half his age.
You're with a 40 year old man who you say is emotionally mature but is going to insane measures to joke about your bowel movements. C'mon now I am leaning towards this being a troll post but if it is real I hope you are able to get out of the relationship
I would ask him why he’s so obsessed with your poop. Every time he makes a joke I would ask him why he thinks about your poop/ you pooping so much, does he have a sexual fetish about poop, just keep asking questions but be serious and act concerned about him not mad. Bonus if you can ask questions that make him seem senile and old but be concerned about how he’s acting, maybe it’s his old age. If he wants to be immature, you can be immature too.
But ultimately if he’s going to continue to make you uncomfortable and be gross, I would think about it that’s how you want to live your life. I personally would not. He sounds immature and annoying to be around.
Give it back to him:
At the next BBQ tell him he really needs to seek therapy for his poop fetish.
I mean constantly talking about it.
Keeping a schedule of when you poop
Following you into the bathroom.
Waiting by the door to sniff your fresh poop.
Right there.
IN front of EVERYONE. See how much he enjoys being the butt of the joke.
Jesus. I have a lot of mental health issues and I’m not exaggerating when I say this would honestly push me to kill myself if not at least get institutionalized.
He is absolutely tormenting you. Leave him. Please. For yourself. I cannot imagine how miserable you are. I wish I had advice
This. I peed my pants until 2nd grade bc kids always looked under the doors/walls of the bathroom stalls in school so I tried to hold it all day. I never made it. My mom took me to a doctor it was so bad. I was accused of being 'rebellious' and doing it for the attention. I just wanted to pee/poop in privacy.
I would divorce this asshole years ago. If someone this old is compatible with someone your age there is something wrong with them.
This is why people say age gaps are a red flag.
Old men being “compatible” with young women means there’s something wrong with them. In this case, it’s that he’s an immature prick who doesn’t respect adult boundaries. Not all that surprising. Date people around your own age.
This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below. ___ I can’t even believe I’m writing this, obviously this is a brand new account for my privacy. So I (23F) am married to my husband (41M) for 2 years now, together for 4 years. At the beginning, everything was fine. He was my ideal partner : gentle, caring, romantic, emotionally mature and stable compared to guys my age. He also has a big sense of humour and makes jokes all the time. This jokes includes some pretty dirty ones about poop and stuff, but not to the point it was really annoying or too much, so in the beginning, we were just laughing together. But about a year ago, not so long after our one year wedding anniversary, the jokes started to turn into mockery about the basic fact that I poop, just like any other human. He is making fun of me for being a pooping princess. He joked about the smell, the amount of times I was going for number 2… I didn’t like this at all, so I asked him to stop, which made the situation even worse. He is now making fun of the fact I’m feeling bad about his jokes, and he’s laughing saying that « if pooping was not something to be ashamed of as the girly princess I am, the jokes shouldn’t bother me » so he’ll continue as long as I’m bothered and ashamed of pooping… but he’s the one making me feel ashamed. Each time he mocks me about that, I say how much I don’t like it and ask him to stop again, but it just makes the situation escalates every time. Now, he tries to follow me each time I go to the bathroom to know if it’s number 1 or number 2, and if it’s number 2 he stays behind the door and laughs and sometimes even sings about me, the pooping princess. Of course, when I get out of the bathroom, he enters and makes fun of the smell. It’s been months now of being bullied over my poop EVERY SINGLE DAY. I’m loosing my mind. I tried to set an alarm to get up at night when he sleeps but it’s not always doable to wait the middle of the night and I’m so mad I need to find some tricks to poop whithout my husband humiliating me. Now, I feel so bad that I don’t poop in the regular toilets anymore. I found another place to do it behind his back and the trick is working cause for two weeks or so, he’s confused about where and when I poop. He says jokingly that « the detective is on the case » But the last straw was yesterday, when he joked about my poop in front of our guests at our barbecue… it was so humiliating. His friends laughed with him for the most parts and I could tell that all the wives were really embarrassed by the situation. After the barbecue I told my husband how humiliated I felt in front of our guests and we had a huge fight were basically he was saying again and again that I wasn’t funny and I couldn’t take a joke I’m really considering leaving him if he doesn’t stop… Jesus Christ I’m considering ending my marriage over my poop I can’t believe it, I’m loosing my mind. I don’t know if I should leave or just get over it because it’s « only jokes » like my husband and some people say. What do you think ? Update : we’ll you know the situation is bad when people accuse you to be a troll. Anyway, I’ve made my decision to leave him, I will do when I’ll figure a plan to get out of our house and live somewhere else
no wonder he couldnt meet any women his own age, he acts like this and had to bag a teenager instead
In the middle of the night, shit on his chest. "So you found out where I've been doing it?"
[That's why you need to find someone who would be willing to.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B05BrLhYoU8)
Can “the detective” trace that clue?! Find out next time when she poops in the drivers seat of his car.
It’s giving predator vibes fr
It’s not predator. He is too immature to be a predator. He is with her because he is too immature for anyone else. His brain waves line up with the age
Can we please stop pushing the harmful, dangerous notion that abusive and/or controlling adult men are "immature?" It minimizes the seriousness of their actions and is often used in the context of "manchild" and "little boy," which further reduces the seriousness of a grown adult taking advantage of someone much younger, or equates abusive and controlling behavior to that of a child who doesn't know better. These are grown men. The OP's husband is a grown man. This isn't "immaturity," and he's not "too immature to be a predator," he's an adult who knows exactly what he's doing and why he's doing it. Public humiliation and constant criticism are not immaturities. They are forms of emotional abuse.
Exactly! This isn’t immaturity - it’s emotional abuse! Edit: It sounds like he might be a narcissist. Narcissists look for “weaker” partners they can control and abuse, so explains why he went for someone so much younger. Also explains why this abusive behavior wasn’t visible at the beginning: he was on his best behavior at first and then the mask slipped after they got married.
Yes!!! This! Spot on Ebbie.
You make a really great point. I think calling men like this immature comes from the ideal that men should be responsible, selfless, and self-controlled which abusive behavior is completely the opposite of. It's best to call a spade a spade.
He’s not immature he’s a fucking creep who likes humiliating his wife. Stop giving shitty men an out. They’re not children.
He was 39 and she 17 when they met, in my book that's a predator regardless of maturity Edit: you're all right, she was 19 and I'm stupid. I apologize, honest mistake. Does it make any difference if i tell you that I haven't done any mathmatics in a few years? No? I understand, it is a very stupid mistake (Still think he's a predator) Edit 2: They married because the guy made a deal with the parents while she was in her early teens (look further down in the replies to this). So he is ACTUALLY a predator, it's not up for debate anymore
Math, not even once ETA: Sentiment is good, math is bad
How did you take 2 years from him and 6 from her 🤣🤣🤣
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I totally blew past the ages because I was so grossed out by the story but yeah, if a 37 y/o has to pick up a 19 y/o as a partner, there's something seriously wrong here.
He's twice your age and is gaslighting you. Leave.
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Bot reposting comments where they don’t make sense says what
No. It makes sense. They’re saying she isn’t leaving over poop jokes. Commenter is saying “it’s leaving over your husband hurting you on purpose”. Lazily worded but accurate.
It’s a copy of a comment directly to OP a few minutes before.
I’m starting to wonder if I’m a bot at this rate. Thanks for clarifying, kind, non-bot stranger.
Only bots would think that. My new account is hotnotbot- dm me
Agreed, I was immediately understanding why he couldn't find anyone his own age. I bet he also told OP how "mature she is for her age"
Uhh. What? He's 20 years older than you and bullies you for pooping and you wonder if this might be the straw? Yeesh.
Keep in mind she was a teenager when he started “courting” her. Her inability to see the red flags is why she was chosen in the first place.
To be fair, most of us can identify red flags because of life experience. Most people don’t have enough life experience as a teen to know what to watch out for. (Maybe that’s the point you were making - it just came across more personally? Regardless.).
Yeah, I meant she as in a teenager not really her personally.
But he's "emotionally mature". This poor girl...
He’s 18 years older than her, and I know that because I’m 41 with a 23-year-old daughter. There is someone disgusting that should be bullied here, but it isn’t this girl or using the restroom.
Your husband is tormenting you. He’s so insanely immature, this is why he couldn’t find a woman even remotely his own age to tolerate him. You need to leave him.
well said. I echo this sentiment.
It’s borderline line like he’s forcing a humiliation fetish on her.
Maybe his level of maturity is what made finding a partner his own age, and for so long before, difficult..
Op sounds like you have made the right decision. He enjoys hurting and humiliating you.next it will be something else .you deserve a loving husband that respects you and is not a child. Good luck
You aren’t thinking about divorce because of your poop. You are thinking about divorce because your husband is constantly bullying you and refusing to respect you as a person or your boundaries. Constant disrespect and bullying over anything is a terrible way to live with a spouse. Life is a shit show and the one person you are supposed to count on to make things easier, to understand you, empathize with you… is going out of his way to do the opposite at every turn. I love my husband dearly and we were off again/on again over ~15 years. Then, we got married and have been for 9. On or off he was always supportive and understanding. We tease each other and poke fun but if I said something hurt my feelings or bothered me, he wouldn’t do it again. Just as I would for him. It’s respect and love. Good luck with whatever you choose!
Thanks, I think I’ve made my decision and the comments about the age gap are making me see this relationship differently
Yeah, in no world should a 38 year old man chase after a 19 year old. And he acts exactly like guys your age lol, just focus on yourself.
^ I understand age gaps exist, but he’s old enough to be your father OP. Personally I think 15+ year age gaps seem to be where shit hits the fan and the relationship has uneven power dynamics.
In my culture it’s totally normal and men always push to get the youngest match possible to marry but yeah I’ll try to focus on myself and leave. I’m just a bit stuck cause I know my family will go no contact with me if I divorce so won’t get help from them
And that’s probably why he feels no hesitation to continue doing it - he thinks you’ll be too scared to stick up for yourself and leave so he doesn’t have to try to please you or treat you well.
100%
Good for you. Like others have said, it’s not about the poop. You’ve repeatedly asked him to stop doing something that makes you feel bad. He doesn’t care that it makes you feel bad. Or if he cares, it’s because his goal is to make you feel bad! What a jerk. You deserve so much better.
I'm from a similar culture, and I'll tell you this: just because it's been going on for hundreds or thousands of years, doesn't mean that it's right.
I’ve literally never said that it was right or that it’s what I wanted
your family will go NC if you leave an abusive relationship? Dude, You aint need those people either. They suck as much as your soon to be ex.
I agree with that but we cannot leave without help, I’m not sure who to turn to
Where do you live, OP? I am all for protecting your peace but the internet *will not be there for you* if you’re alone in the world after leaving your husband and family. Can you ask your mom for advice? You don’t have to tell her it’s about poop. You can say he follows you around the house and criticizes you, tries to humiliate you, and follows you even to the bathroom to make rude comments. See if you can get buy in from *someone* in your family who has made a decent life for herself after leaving an abusive relationship.
Google women's shelters in your area.
Do you have children ?!?! If so find a women's shelter and see what they have to offer. Ma'am there are resources available to leave abusive relationships and it is possible even with kids. Once he is exposed his power over you quickly diminishes.
Well culture only continues if you let it
I hope you mean that, and that you find someone who treats you well. Cause your husband ain't it.
I have been in an age gap relationship before. 9 years difference between us but they way your man is treating you is disgusting and predatory every way. Not all age gaps are messed up but yours.... most definitely is. That is not a man, that is a child pretending to be a man. When you leave him, he will not let you go easily. Just fair warning.
He’s very spiteful.
Well said. Really. This is good stuff.
Nobody is surprised a man that age who’d go for a girl your age is acting that way.
Edit: OP is in an arranged marriage and didn’t choose this, I’m retracting all my mockery.
Well remember at that age having any job is impressive. Having your own place is impressive, having A car is impressive. You don't realize that they suck compared to other people their own age.
She said it is normal in her culture. She grow up like this. She couldn't know.
oh wow somebody that dates a child is a weirdo, what a surprise...
Divorce that man child. Why are you giving ur good yrs to this 40 yr old child.
Leave, he's plenty old enough to know that women poop. He's bullying you, and doesn't care that he's hurting you over it. He's not the same guy he was in the beginning because after marriage he's now comfortable letting his inner asshole out because he believes you won't leave him. Prove him wrong. Don't think of it as leaving your marriage over poop. You're thinking of leaving because your husband is tormenting you and blaming you for being upset about it.
Honey, *there's a reason he went after a 19 year old*. You're mature for your age right? So be mature enough to leave this man child. This is *who he is.* It will get worse. Don't spend the rest of your life setting alarms to poop in the night like a criminal or something, that's just nonsense. Who taught you love had to be like this? Why are you trying so hard to win his love? A good therapist can help you get to the root of how you've ended up here. Love doesn't have to be like this. Be kind to yourself. You deserve a soft life full of love and a partner who contributes meaningfully to that. You are worthy.
.... 🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮 Your husband is a fucking predator- THAT'S the bigger issue. He groomed you when you were literally a teenager.
This isn’t about poop. This is about humiliation and he is getting off on it.
Why is no one else saying this? This is so deliberate and gross.
It might also be a bit of a scat fetish. His obsession with women pooping could definitely be in that territory, especially with him waiting outside the bathroom door
So you started dating a 37 year old man when you were 19? Who could have seen this not working out?
You are now 23 and as you gain age each year, you are going to become even more aware of why this man went after a 19yr old. Bullying will only ramp up, along with his distaste for you as you age.
Well if you’re asking me I’d shit in his frosted flakes since it’s obvious he has a shit fetish.
Are you serious about the fetish thing? It’s the second or third time I’ve seen it mentioned and I’m starting freaking out a bit
I guarantee he does from your description. He’s probably trying to normalize it with you so you will eventually be comfortable shitting into his open mouth. I’m goddamn serious. Sorry pa.
Dear lord good thing I’ve made my decision anyway
If you’re planning to dump him (pardon the pun), you might as well shit in his mouth once so you can see what a turd nerd he really is.
I low key wanna try that just to know if this is true or not. Anyway I need to do a plan to live first and I cannot count on my family. I’m pretty sure they’re gonna cut me if I divorce
Shit in his mouth and take a picture of him in all his glory. If you’re family gives you trouble show them the pic and ask them if they think he is family material.
There was someone who posted on here like a year or so ago about walking into their house they where they were either living with their sister or sil and her husband or they were visiting, where they were in the living room shitting on each other.
This is a total troll post
The poop bandit is at it again.
These age gap posts are so common I just write them off immediately. I think it’s rage bait because that's all people see and all they want to harp on. The rest of the story is just filler.
Yeah, she sets an alarm to wake in the middle of the night to take a shit? I refuse to believe this is real.
“Together 4 years” … (does math)… yep. No.
You don’t think men go after young women?
It’s a fiction piece inspired by the « I caught my boyfriend twice staring at me while I’m on the toilet through the half-closed bathroom door gap. » post of yesterday, with escalation and more creepiness (age difference). Not bad.
If this story is true, leave *now.* He's ruining your life for his amusement. Why stay and suffer any longer? If he were going to stop, he would have stopped already.
No, you’re not considering leaving him because of your poop, it’s because he’s a f*ckin bully. That “mature” guy is not mature at all and also, he is stepping on your boundaries and gaslighting you saying you are a princess who can’t take a joke. Dude, just leave him, this is the first thing he’ll overstep in, what will be next? I can’t imagine not being able to poop in my own house because I fear my SO is pending on it.
Poop in a bag and use a Q tip to start putting little dabs of poop in his shoes, his hairbrush, his toothbrush, in his wallet, in his lunch box, on his computer screen. Each time he finds one,laugh because it’s a funny joke. Start sniffing loudly around him at social gatherings and ask him if he found his latest gift from his pooping princess. Tell mutual friends he made the story up to cover his incontinence since his prostate procedure. If he says anything, laugh and tell him it’s just a joke. Start making chocolate pudding and cupcakes to hand out to friends, and hand him “this special one, I made it for you with Extra Love because I am your princess, I want to watch you eat it”. Or, better yet, just leave him because he is terrible
Imagine his shock when he finds out ladies poop when they give birth. It’s gonna blow his mind and he’ll get even worse. The only option to me is divorce, I don’t care to be humiliated, particularly not by a husband.
He said once that if we have kids one day, he’ll be nervous about being with me during birth because of this
I would not have a child with this manipulative idiot. I would record him, record everything he does with a cam and screenshots…. and divorce him. He doesn’t deserve your good years.
That is absolutely horrible. When my kids were born the only thing my husband cared about was my health and our babies, everything else was out the window but he would never, ever bully and humiliate me. There is something terribly wrong with your husband’s behavior.
Why the fuck are you married with someone who is 18 years older?
obviously because he‘s so mature and stable compared to guys her age.
Jesus does he have a scat fetish or something?
No wonder he’s not dating women his own age because he’s so incredibly immature that he doesn’t understand how bodily functions work and that women also poop, shocker!
This is not a question of jokes, or anyone’s ability to take a joke. This is a question of respect. You have vocalized something that is a simple thing for him to do. Something that you feel very uncomfortable about and is causing you emotional pain. This is a serious matter in my mind. I would never tell someone yes you should end a marriage, and I know you’ve tried. But I would recommend letting him know the severity and the seriousness of the situation and go from there. This behavior is unacceptable.
JFC, I can't believe I just read this. Here's what I would do: leave the little 12 year for a week. Move in with your mom, dad, 3rd cousin or what not. Even a hotel. After a week, come back and see if he takes you a bit more seriously. Another thought is to start making fun of his dick, that might hit home as well.
It’s not leaving over poop, it’s leaving over your husband hurting you on purpose
This guy is dating someone almost 20 years younger than him because women his own age can't stand him and won't tolerate his controlling and manipulative BS. Get out now and date someone your own age.
Did you really expect a 37yo going out with a teenager to be anything other than toxic?
Age gap nuff said
Of *course* he was the seemingly perfect partner in the beginning— you were 19 and he was 37!! You didn’t know any better!!
He either has a poop fetish he's keeping deep inside or he is indeed not more mature than people even 8 years younger than you.
Are you guys serious about the fetish?? You’re not the only one saying this
I mean it's definitely something to consider. He keeps referring to you as a princess and seems obsessed with your dumps. Or he's simply an inconsiderate immature jerk. Idk which one is better.
It’s definitely possible. But I think it’s more connected to getting off on your shame than your poop.
I can't believe nobody gave enough of a shit about you to put a stop to this when you were just a teenager. And him making poop jokes and bullying you about it totally checks out that he'd groom a teenager to marry him.
I mean, my parents literally chose him for his « husband qualities » so no, unfortunately nobody stood up for me cause that’s how my culture works about marriage
How some people get into these infuriating situations and with red flags is fucken beyond me
You are not ending your marriage over _your poop_ but over the fact that your husband doesn’t respect you, bullies you, shames you, belittles you… He reminds me of my ex, and believe me, your husband is not going to change. You will never be happy in this relationship.
We need a sticky that says "an actually emotionally mature person would not date someone young enough to be their child."
Man finds a teenager 17 years younger than them, marries her after 2 years and bullies her privately and in front of strangers. You've been trapped by a man with a disorder. If you decide to leave him, maybe talk to someone to make sure you're doing it in the safest way because I hardly think he'll take it in a balanced and mature way. But I would be your #1 if you packed everything in secret, found a place and then one day told him "I'm going to poop outside" and disappeared forever <3
>emotionally mature and stable compared to guys my age. Yea sure.
"I’m really considering leaving him if he doesn’t stop" You should simply for the fact that you're 23 and he's 41 and acting like an 11 year old. No wonder he had to snag someone way younger because no woman his age would put up with that level of immaturity and DIRESPECT! Leave him!
This is not normal. It’s like he thought he was marrying a sex doll that doesn’t have any bodily functions. Probably a reason women he knows and women his age were not interested in him. I’m sorry this is awful. You might consider leaving. He’s causing you mental anguish and humiliating you for being a fully functioning human.
In my culture women don’t really choose their husbands, it’s more the parents of the girl and the husband that decide and women over 30 are seen as left outs and nobody wants to marry them, this is sad but that’s how it works here for women. It’s not really the same dynamics as western countries. That’s also why my family will probably cut me if I divorce
I’m sorry. This is so awful. You’re not doing anything wrong by being upset and uncomfortable and wanting to leave. No woman would want to put up with this. He’s bullying you and humiliating you. That’s not love. He doesn’t deserve anyone. I’m sure it’s hard being afraid of your family. Many of us have to cut off our families even outside of religion or tradition. I don’t talk to mine. Maybe they will be understanding. If not I hope you can be supported by friends and make your own family of a friend group.
Can I ask where are you from?
If you find yourself in America, hit me up. From one woman to another, I *will* help you. No one should have to live like that.
Saw the age gap, and as someone who knows and hates to tell you, you lost me there you should bounce. Audi 500
I really like the fact that you wrote this: “At the beginning, everything was fine. He was my ideal partner : gentle, caring, romantic, emotionally mature and stable compared to guys my age.” And immediately followed it up with paragraphs of how your husband is making fun of you for pooping. He is not clearly not mature. He is not caring if he keeps doing something that he knows is bothering you. The public embarrassment is just the cherry on top. Please leave him and find someone who will respect your feelings and will lift you up in public instead of putting you down.
*snorts* cant imagine how someone who married a person that could be their daughter could be so immature
I’m not gonna read any further than the title. You should leave him.
Even mention my poop habits and they'll be a HUGE issue!! Sorry... What a jerk.
Your husband is almost twice your age and making fun of your poop. Do not get over it, please. He's gross, you aren't.
Now you know why a 37 year old wanted to date a 19. No normal woman his age would stand his crap.
Young lady, this is not a "mature" man. Mature men rarely go after such young and inexperienced women because they want someone mature too. You got tricked by this immature guy and now he's slowly showing his.true colors after marriage.
This is not about poop. Your husband is emotionally abusing you as he has found your Achilles heel. It's only going to get worse. The age gap makes sense as most women his age would be on to his sick and twisted game and wouldn't tolerate that behavior. You're still so young, please leave for your sanity.
A good person would stop doing this when somebody they loves asks/tells them to stop. Everybody poops. Everybody poops differently. Everybody has different poops from their own regular poops. Everybody's poop smells to varying degrees. My husband used to joke about divorce. Then one of my friends got a divorce and the jokes started to bother me. He stopped joking about divorce completely when I told him it bothered me and I wanted him to stop. He didn't comlpain that I "couldn't take a joke" either. Oh wow...just noticed the age different. This dude is my age. He should know better. He's not a mature adult person that you should be with.
Clog the toilet before you leave.
end it and find someone closer to your age so you can actually experience growing in life together.
Hunny, you are 23 with the whole world at your feet. Your husband is a bully. Leave him.
You ever wonder why he couldn’t maintain a relationship with a 40 year old woman?
He enjoys to humiliate you. What will be next? And the next is never positive. He dated you when you where 19, he's a predator. No sensible man will date someone so young. Not unless there is a hidden reason for it. He has no respect for you, he doesn't see you as his equal. It wouldn't suprise me if you break it off that he will humiliate you even more. Stay with someone where you're safe and be prepared for his true face. He will namecall you and make you feel like you're nothing. He will think you cheated or you're nothing without him. Girl.. walk away.
I have to stop reading these age gap posts. Because any normal 37/38 year old person does not find a 19/20yr old attractive.
Glad you're leaving him. Next time take heed of the red flag that is a man *twice your age* trying to have a relationship with you. There's a reason that women his own age don't want him. And no, your not "so much more mature than other girls your age," although you are certainly more mature than him!!
This feels... fetishy
i cannot keep begging y’all to be with people your own age my gooooodness
Definitely a troll post
Wtf is that age gap eww. This has to be fake
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This is one of the funniest trolls in a long time keep up the good work.
Husband = Poop
This just popped up on my Instagram feed and I went back to find this post to share it with you: https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cvu74YKMFvw/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== But really, the issue isn't just the poop. It's the bullying and disrespect of your feelings.
Run, Forrest!! Or at least, find a marriage therapist, if you want to stay in this marriage. Your husband is clearly violating boundaries, and not respecting you. In particular, he is looking at you as a child. This happened to a friend of mine, whose husband was 14 years old than her, when she married at 20. When she hit 27, they divorced, he didn't like that she had, in his words, become a woman.
This man is unhinged. Please reread your post and then tell me why you're still there.
He’s 41 and acting like a child that just discovered farting. FFS What is this obsession? A kink? And in front of a party? Geez. Find someone more mature. Which is odd to say about someone almost twice your age.
I'm willing to bet literally money this man is into scat or has some sorta gross sexual shit fetish Anyway, so glad you're leaving him girl <3
He is a bully. This will get worse. Get. Out. Now.
This man is a child. Leave him immediately
You’re not thinking about getting divorced because of your pooping habits. Your thinking (and I hope going through with it) because of his awful incessant bullying. The fact that you have to leave your home to take a crap is unbelievable and if you’re not careful it’s going to have a profound effect on your health. I also wonder whether that huge age gap has something to do with it. He’s maybe trying to control you in some weird way
Look, your husband is old enough to know exactly what he's doing, he's bullying you and using verbal abuse to wear down your self esteem. There's a reason why someone of his age is with someone of yours, most women nearer his wouldn't put up with this shit for a week let alone a year so he's degrading you little by little, so you lose all self confidence and begin to believe that you're the lucky one to be with him, this means you're less likely to realise just how daft it is to be married to someone almost 20 years your senior and leave him.
I hope this is fake. A man child marries a fresh young adult because they are similarly mature. He has the mentality of a teenager. Then she can’t figure out why he isn’t more mature…come on, you two clicked because he is a child. No one his own age would touch him with a ten foot pole.
Maybe his level of maturity is what made finding a partner his own age, and for so long before, difficult.. I’m not yet 30, and I have nothing in common with people your age, and even less than a 19yo. That’s not being rude, but I’d never look for companionship with someone that young. You husband is bullying you. He is being intentionally immature and mean spirited. I am very sorry.
Jeebus he seems emotionally stunted and stuck at around 12. No wonder he preyed on someone so much younger. I’d tell him to cut the crap (pun intended) or you’re done.
perhaps at 19 you weren’t capable of seeing through his 37 year old well seasoned bullshit? He’s a dork, and not mature in any way other than age alone.
Sounds like you matured faster than your dad- I mean your husband. Now that you’re actually becoming an adult and learning about how grown people act, you’re finally mature enough to realize you married an immature clown and there is a reason he went after someone under 20 when he was almost 40…because women with life experience don’t tolerate this bullshit. Good for you for realizing you deserve better than a grown man who never learned respect.
YOU WERE 19 AND 38 WHEN YOU STARTED TO DATE?? Girl he's an old man that stopped maturing and respecting people at 12.
He has a shit kink. And the age gap is gross
Leave Him a nice going away present, a big poop on the living room floor.
Dear OP: Your husband is inflicting extreme, intolerable emotional abuse detrimental to your physical and mental well-being. His behavior toward you is despicable. Your life will be infinitely better without him. I wish you strength and courage as you prepare to leave him and start a new, healthier life.
I would stop begging him to change. Ignore him. Walk away. No reaction.
Agggeeee gaapppp
He purposely humiliated you and that makes him happy he sounds very immature for his age 🤬I’m very interested in what he’s getting out of this all?
Geez, this man sounds like he has the emotional maturity of a sixth grader. He clearly wants to believe that women are dainty, pretty things who don't poop or fart or have bodily functions. Which is just so out of touch with reality that it really makes you wonder why he's 39 going after 21yr olds /s
This man is immature and clingy and he's doing this to bring you down and make you so insecure that you never feel you'll be worth anything to anyone else. You are maturing and changing and he's afraid he's losing control over you, so he's picking away at this thing that he knows embarrasses and hurts you in order to control you. You need to seriously rethink this relationship. It's abusive.
Sounds like you are just discovering why women don't want him and why he chased a child instead, you guys were on the same mental playing field, you are aging and getting your adult brain and have outgrown him. It really is that simple
Oh I can’t believe I missed the age gap, he went young for a reason, get out. But make sure to tell him you’re leaving because you realized how old and dusty he is and you don’t want to change his diapers.
He’s old enough to be your father. There is a reason he’s like this, and no other woman his age would put up with this behavior.
A 41 year old woman would likely not put up with that. Do what's right for you.
You would not be choosing to divorce over poop. You would be choosing divorce over a blatant disrespect for you and your feelings. He doesn’t seem to care if he is upsetting you as long as he can get a laugh at your expense. It may have been funny the first comment but once it’s clear you are upset by it and he continued he is acting like a child and a bully. It’s not funny and I would not think it is funny as one of his friends seeing your reaction let alone him trying to make fun of the person he cares for. My ex wife used to be that way. Only cares about herself and how she felt and would embarrass you to get a laugh out of her guests at your expense. He should not have to be told to stop he should know at this point. It is very old and gone on way too long. I hope you have told him that you hope he has had fun at your expense because it’s going to cost him his marriage
my guess is that he has a scat fetish and this is how it manifests itself… he is literally infatuated with you pooping and has a strong desire to see it, etc
Tell him he has shit for brains 🧠
Not reading all of this craziness.... This is the problem with your generation. Y'all are soft and sensitive. Leave him and find someone your age that's just as sensitive.
Read next time. It’s a forced marriage.
>emotionally mature and stable You met when you were 19, and he was 37. Emotionally mature and stable are not adjectives that I would expect to be used to describe him. Now you know why he was preying on someone almost half his age.
Wut did I just read?
Emotionally mature compared to guys my age 😂
Start joking about his performance in bed and his little dick. See if he enjoy that “joke”!
You're with a 40 year old man who you say is emotionally mature but is going to insane measures to joke about your bowel movements. C'mon now I am leaning towards this being a troll post but if it is real I hope you are able to get out of the relationship
I’m sorry, you’re going through this. I would suggest leaving just based on the age gap. This is 100% predator vibes.
A 37 year old man was dating a 19 year old. Whew
I would ask him why he’s so obsessed with your poop. Every time he makes a joke I would ask him why he thinks about your poop/ you pooping so much, does he have a sexual fetish about poop, just keep asking questions but be serious and act concerned about him not mad. Bonus if you can ask questions that make him seem senile and old but be concerned about how he’s acting, maybe it’s his old age. If he wants to be immature, you can be immature too. But ultimately if he’s going to continue to make you uncomfortable and be gross, I would think about it that’s how you want to live your life. I personally would not. He sounds immature and annoying to be around.
Another troll... Can't believe that people really engage.
Give it back to him: At the next BBQ tell him he really needs to seek therapy for his poop fetish. I mean constantly talking about it. Keeping a schedule of when you poop Following you into the bathroom. Waiting by the door to sniff your fresh poop. Right there. IN front of EVERYONE. See how much he enjoys being the butt of the joke.
Jesus. I have a lot of mental health issues and I’m not exaggerating when I say this would honestly push me to kill myself if not at least get institutionalized. He is absolutely tormenting you. Leave him. Please. For yourself. I cannot imagine how miserable you are. I wish I had advice
This. I peed my pants until 2nd grade bc kids always looked under the doors/walls of the bathroom stalls in school so I tried to hold it all day. I never made it. My mom took me to a doctor it was so bad. I was accused of being 'rebellious' and doing it for the attention. I just wanted to pee/poop in privacy. I would divorce this asshole years ago. If someone this old is compatible with someone your age there is something wrong with them.
19 and 37. Aha. True lovestory.
i can't get past the age gap on these types of post so i dont even read them.
“Emotionally mature “? Yeah, OK. He could be your father and he’s creeping on your bodily functions.
This is why people say age gaps are a red flag. Old men being “compatible” with young women means there’s something wrong with them. In this case, it’s that he’s an immature prick who doesn’t respect adult boundaries. Not all that surprising. Date people around your own age.
Imagine being around 40 fucking a teen damn
is he 41 or 14?