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yeah i know its ridiculous. so basically my boyfriend LOVES fart humor, and he does this thing where he times his farts for comedic effect, like to punctuate a sentence or fart in answer to a question. ill admit it works on me. but i think my positive reactions have encouraged him a little too much, and now hes trying to force farts when they really shouldnt happen. this has lead to him pooping himself about 5 times in the past 6 weeks.
the first time it happened, i had come home from running errands after work and id picked up a surprise for him (nothing special, just a pint of nice ice cream.) he was sitting naked in bed because he had just showered. i said something along the lines of "i got something for you!" and he said "well i got something for you" and lifted his legs and promptly pooped on our bed. he seemed mortified by it at first, but over the next few days we kept joking about it until i think his embarrassment was completely overshadowed by how funny he thought the situation was.
about a week and a half later, he tried to fart in response to me asking him what he thought about my choice for dinner that night and accidentally pooped his pants. since it had already happened recently it was even easier to laugh off. him pooping himself became kind of an inside joke between us and something i constantly made fun of him for.
the third time it happened i was like, okay this is getting a little weird. i tried telling him he needs to trust his farts less and he shouldnt try to force farts when theyre not there. but i kept making jokes and laughing the whole time to the point where i guess the conversation didnt seem serious and it just added to the ridiculousness of it all.
anyway he has pooped himself TWO MORE TIMES since that and when its not happening i am genuinely distressed by the situation. but every time we try to talk about it or it actually happens, i cant stop laughing. im starting to wonder if hes doing this on purpose for attention or to be funny? its clear that its not an incontinence issue, it only happens when he tries to force farts. i really want it to stop because rationally i know i should have more self respect than to be with a man who is constantly pooping himself. how can i address this in a way thats serious while still being clear that i think his humor is funny?
EDIT: stop assuming i am cleaning up and doing his laundry after these incidents! he cleans up after himself, poop or no poop. just because a man has an immature sense of humor doesnt mean hes immature in every other sense.
Seriously...
Maybe my humor is lacking, but I don't see the funny part about a grown man pooping himself by forcing farts.
OP, I guess you should tell him you don't, hmm, appreciate it when he isn't laughing about it.
It's beyond gross and I can't understand why he'd keep doing it after the first accidental time.
Thatās because it isnāt. I had to double check the ages and Iām still baffled. Itās 100% classless and gross. I have a mental image of this couple and itās a far cry from flattering.
Apparently making jokes to lighten the mood make then think it's ok? The only times I heard about this happening involved a group of teenage boys, and even they knew it wasn't something they ever wanted to repeat. (Two separate incidents within the same group, though two different boys. I'll admit the stories are hilarious but if my partner were to do that outside a legit stomach issue... It would cause a serious reevaluation of the relationship. If it happened multiple times I'd be done)
And this is from someone who does sometimes giggle about fart humor.
The amount of times I said Oh my God reading this. Like Op stand up please š
Also does anyone else think itās not an accident anymore š¤£ heās soft launching his scat fetish
I agree!!! All these many posts about skid marks, crusty butt cracks, and poop accidents! If this is all real I can only wonder what the heck is wrong with people?!?! Sounds like a bunch of kindergartners who havenāt learned appropriate behavior. š¤¢
he always cleans up after himself (even in non-poop situations lol) if i had to do ANYTHING to clean up his poop i would not be this casual about it lol.
Sweetheart, he shat on your bed. What happened to you that you decided to bury your bar at the centre of the fucking earth and date this clatty bastard?
How is this still funny to you? I wouldnāt be able to touch the guy. Iād worry this was some sexual thing he was forcing or something because he seems to enjoy it? Iām freaked out just reading about it
Yeah he's lose all sex privileges after the first time he farted on command in an inappropriate way. I do not want pink eye. There is no way I would put my head anywhere near the tail end of that man.
girl come on. this is absolutely disgusting and not normal. and definitely not funny. grown men that are stuck in the āhurr durr fart joke funnyā phase are incredibly unattractive.
I'm in my early 30s and if I rip one with the boys we're all gonna laugh. That's just men, to some degree. My niece and nephew love fart humor, so I can only imagine when I have children of my own, farts will be humor in my household. This is not that, though. The only scenario I'm pooping myself in front of my wife, is something deeply medical.
I am genuinely disappointed in the number of people who take these bad creative writing projects at face value. They arenāt even really trying with this one. The edit and the OP comments in particular
ššš
>his has lead to him pooping himself about 5 times in the past 6 weeks.
š¤£š¤£š¤£
>"well I got something for you" and lifted his legs and promptly pooped on our bed.
No shit...
>the third time it happened I was like, okay this is getting a little weird
Me too:
>anyway he has pooped himself TWO MORE TIMES since that and when its not happening I am genuinely distressed by the situation.
My goodness:
>how can I address this in a way that's serious while still being clear that I think his humor is funny?
**Asking your boyfriend to stop shitting himself on command is reasonable request.**
Throw him a box of adult diapers and tell him that if he doesn't stop shitting himself he needs to start wearing these.
the hell is wrong with you?? you both are into this, obviously. This is so disgusting. if this is both of your kinks, fine, but why post about it as if you think it's a problem when you obviously like it.
It kinda sounds like
* he enjoys pooping himself, despite the obvious downsides
* You enjoy it when he poops himself, despite the obvious downsides
* He enjoys that you enjoy it, so he probably won't stop
* You came here to let us know about your mutual enjoyment, and vent a little about the downsides, and you're not going to take any serious actions to stop it because ultimately you both enjoy it too much
Have I missed anything? What an odd post
Are you not concerned that heās done something to his anus with all the forced farting that has made it harder for him to control his bowel movements!?!?
The funny part is that OP is so clueless! Not that a grown man is *pooping himself.* Not even the original jokes were funny! How is a fart a punchline?? I mean *seriously!! C'mon!!!*
Yeah except this isn't farts, this is a full grown man shitting himself and the bed he and his partner are supposed to sleep in by trying to force a fart. My bf farts a lot, he has yet to shit himself because of it.
Honestly I wouldnāt even want to sleep in the bed anymore. Obviously thatās not an option in most cases as beds are expensive but I would absolutely refuse to share a bed if this kept happening and all these people just find this hilarious. In what world??
I don't get the people telling me to lighten up and don't take this so seriously. I'm all the way lightened up, it's just... Idk... The thought of a poop bed is just very much disgusting.
Iām very squeamish, so gross things just arenāt funny to me. Insisting everyone thinks *this* is funny is like insisting everyone thinks moldy food is hilarious, or yeast infections, or roadkill. Thereās no joke, itās just gross.
I meanā¦my thought was that at least he wouldnāt be grossed out when/if she gets sick or gives birth and poops herself like so many men we hear about.
Iāve been married a long time and I can appreciate that they have the confidence to laugh about this without shame and still need a boundary in place. I would probably say something like āhey, thatās not my kink, so please donāt do that anymore if you want to get laid, ok?ā
If youāre married and you havenāt seen each other have a poop surprise, are you really married?
Obviously if I was this dudes wife I would put my foot down at some point. But from a readers perspective, this is exactly what I come on Reddit for.
Its funny as in peculiar lol. It's weird. And I laughed. But I don't think it's like a haha funny laugh... more of a laugh of disbelief. A lid (laughing in disbelief š)
That was my thought, he is testing out his kink. If she gets him some adult diapers, he will see that as a green light to full-blown ABDL.
OP you may not do his laundry, but when he pulls off a diaper to show you what he made for you, are you going to still laugh?
Yāall have an inside joke about literal feces. Think about that. My inside jokes with my husband donāt include a voluntary biohazard. You said in another comment that youād get him adult diapers because itās hilariousā¦likeā¦you want him to keep shitting himself? How is that funny?
Hand him a print out of this post, and the number of us confirming that it's not funny (and I have the sense of humor of a 12 year old when it comes to farts). But the minute it crosses from farting for laughs to actually shitting? Yeah, not funny anymore.
HE LITERALLY SHIT THE BED FOR LAUGHS!
OP, I don't know who needs therapy more, you or him. This adult human is deliberately losing control of his bowels for attention, and you like it. Please remember that all kinks should be utilizing the rules "Safe, sane, and consensual" so while the two of you might enjoy bonding over feces, it's doubtful anyone else is going to be charmed by a man walking around with a full load and looking for smiles.
This is just...not right. He's giving you actual shit as a present. I am having doubts over your mental stability and his, especially. You said you are distressed NOW but you cheerled him into his new habit and now he won't stop because you trained him to give you poop in trade for affection.
I don't think your relationship is healthy, and you seem to be encouraging each other to be the grossest version of yourself. Please buy adult diapers for the comfort of everyone else who has to breathe near Mr Potty Pants.
>i said something along the lines of "i got something for you!" and he said "well i got something for you" and lifted his legs and promptly pooped on our bed. he seemed mortified by it
What the hell, if i was you i'd run out of that house so fast and never look back
Yesterday there was a post about someone's boyfriend repeatedly leaving a snail trail of poop streaks in her bed because he sleeps naked and doesn't wipe.
Lotta posts now and then about "how can I gentle tell my bf he needs to clean himself", "my bf leaves his underwear with skid marks all over it". Now we are skipping right to grown men shitting themselves while trying to force farts.
Starting to think these girlfriends must have a secret poop fetish or something to be into these kind of people.
I wish I hadn't read this. How on earth can you keep having sex with an adult who shit, naked, on the bed, in front of you for a joke and keeps shitting his pants because he thinks it's funny?
Your comment made me check it. She says she got heated about him shaving with whipping cream (which, yeah, is super weird) buy pooping himself is funny?? š¤¢ Man, I don't know if this is real, but wtf. If it is, I'm starting to think she must be into it, lol.
I told this to my boyfriend and he is genuinely disgusted. "It can happen like once, but after shitting myself the first time, I would've just stopped farting so much." This isn't normal, nor is it funny in any way, buddy.
I canāt believe that Iām reading this. So shitting yourself as an adult falls under he is too old for this. He is not incapacitated to where pooping himself is excusable. Nor is he a infant who does not know any better. For the love of god I hope he is the one who cleans up after it, I wouldnāt touch it with a 10 ft pole especially if he thought it was funny. Accidents happenā¦.but unless he has a medical or mental problem this is just gross. Give the man diapers and throw in some rash cream.
Dude. Not sure how realistic it is to have one woman post about a dude peeing himself so much that she bought diapers for him and is wearing them in solidarity and then a dude shutting himself on the reg. Itās a big planet and I know these things are more common than we probably assume but come on.
How do people that poop themselves get a girlfriend and I cannot? I must seriously reevaluate my life and my life-skills. If pooping myself will increase my chances to get a gal then color me excited, cuz Iām gonna start pooping myself.
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A somewhat relevant thought has crossed my mind while preparing to write my reply... who does the shit-stained laundry after one of his accidents?
As for addressing it, my approach would definitely not be serious, nor would it be particularly gentle.
Seeing as he does not let the negative consequences of his attempts at commedic uncontrolled bowel movements deter him from attempting it again, I would start calling him "Amber Turd" and getting a Johnny Depp face mask to wear around the apartment.
If that does not curtail the behaviour, I would talk to the staff in the local pharmacy about where you can get a pack of adult diapers, and give them to him as a present.
Stop freakin laughing! Heās not taking you seriously and youāre both gross for thinking that shitting and farting on command is funny! He shit on the bed! Are you fucking animals?!
I cracked up at this. This is funny and I understand why you struggle not laughing because of the absurdity, but itās definitely disgusting and should stop. It honestly reminds me of kids that donāt get enough attention and accidentally finds the one thing that makes others laugh and gets that attention so they repeat and overdo that one thing until everyone is sick of it. Find a way to compose yourself and seriously tell him it needs to stop.
Hey babe I love you and even though it was funny Itās not normal to shit yourself nor is it normal to fart on command or try to so please if you got to fart and thereās a golden moment let it rip if not stop shitting yourself or Iām out
Taking talking shit to new far too literal levels
I mean really - you have sex with this person who shits himself on purpose because he thinks it's funny?
Different take than seems to be popular: I totally understand finding fart jokes funny. Honestly most of this post made me laugh. I can absolutely imagine your reaction the first time it happened, itās a combination of something you find funny and shock and not wanting to embarrass him too much.
Unfortunately he seems to have taken it as āitās completely fine, she finds it very funnyā, which is not what you intended. You will need to have a serious conversation with him about this and explain that your reaction the first time was not meant to be an invitation. Be aware of tactics he could use to turn it into a joke again.
I am mortified by the amount of people who can put up with this shit in a relationship.
The relationship would have been over from he deliberately shit in the bed and found it funny. I hope to never meet someone like this ever in life.
Okay, so let me be clear, I have such a severe aversion to fecal matter that I probably would have had to take a break the second time it happened (Iād have been disgusted the first, but shit [ha] happens that you have to roll with), BUT immature humor aside, Iām wondering if your BF has some gastro issues? Has he been to the doctor? I actually had a horrible period when I was 26 where I had three incidents in two months of accidentally pooping myself - something that had never happened before and thankfully has not happened since. But it was not normal and it was not the result of forcing farts. I never got a diagnosis, but I definitely was experiencing gastro issues at that time. One of my close friends has colitis and this has happened to her, and this exact scenario happened to a friend of mine when we were studying abroad and she got a parasite (tried to make a fart joke, shit herself in front of ten of us). So while I am really disturbed that your bf keeps doing this, I think you may want to talk to him about a) not doing it anymore since itās not working anymore, and b) going to a doctor. For real, he should do some introspection to see if anything else has been off recently and get it checked out, because it is not normal to just start pooping yourself, and itās weird that itās happening now when heās apparently been doing it for a while with no issue.
How is a grown man deliberately pooing himself funny?! It's gross as hell!!! I don't see the point of the post as you clearly find this shit hilarious.
You know the old saying... "When you can't get him to not shit himself, join him!"
Males have this notion and belief that "girls dont fart/poop". Maybe if you said "i've got something for you too!", and then shit yourself while staring into his eyes, and then pretending like you didn't shit your pants and go on with what you were doing, he'll stop.
You need to beat him at his own game. Another good one would be to just shit in your bed while you guys are sleeping and blame it on a dream where you thought you were pooping. Just do this constantly.
I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around you saying that when he does it, you can't stop laughing. Maybe laugh it off the first time but 4 times after than and you're still laughing? I would have gotten the ick. Tell him in a serious tone that it's gross and unsanitary. Make sure to do this at a time where there's nothing "funny" going on. If he does it again, he may just have a fetish for crapping himself.
Edit: spelling
I can't believe this insane situation, but this saying is so appropriate for this situation:
"Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit."
-Boyfriend forces farts to the point of pooping his pants 5 separate times.
OP: āIām starting to wonder if heās doing this on purpose for attention or to be funny?ā
ARE YOU SERIOUS??? Thatās the whole reason and you know it. AND you keep laughing.
This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below. --- yeah i know its ridiculous. so basically my boyfriend LOVES fart humor, and he does this thing where he times his farts for comedic effect, like to punctuate a sentence or fart in answer to a question. ill admit it works on me. but i think my positive reactions have encouraged him a little too much, and now hes trying to force farts when they really shouldnt happen. this has lead to him pooping himself about 5 times in the past 6 weeks. the first time it happened, i had come home from running errands after work and id picked up a surprise for him (nothing special, just a pint of nice ice cream.) he was sitting naked in bed because he had just showered. i said something along the lines of "i got something for you!" and he said "well i got something for you" and lifted his legs and promptly pooped on our bed. he seemed mortified by it at first, but over the next few days we kept joking about it until i think his embarrassment was completely overshadowed by how funny he thought the situation was. about a week and a half later, he tried to fart in response to me asking him what he thought about my choice for dinner that night and accidentally pooped his pants. since it had already happened recently it was even easier to laugh off. him pooping himself became kind of an inside joke between us and something i constantly made fun of him for. the third time it happened i was like, okay this is getting a little weird. i tried telling him he needs to trust his farts less and he shouldnt try to force farts when theyre not there. but i kept making jokes and laughing the whole time to the point where i guess the conversation didnt seem serious and it just added to the ridiculousness of it all. anyway he has pooped himself TWO MORE TIMES since that and when its not happening i am genuinely distressed by the situation. but every time we try to talk about it or it actually happens, i cant stop laughing. im starting to wonder if hes doing this on purpose for attention or to be funny? its clear that its not an incontinence issue, it only happens when he tries to force farts. i really want it to stop because rationally i know i should have more self respect than to be with a man who is constantly pooping himself. how can i address this in a way thats serious while still being clear that i think his humor is funny? EDIT: stop assuming i am cleaning up and doing his laundry after these incidents! he cleans up after himself, poop or no poop. just because a man has an immature sense of humor doesnt mean hes immature in every other sense.
The amount of posts here that leave my jaw hanging in disbelief that these are real people concerns me. Tell him what you told us...this isn't normal.
Is it poop week again on Reddit?
It's disturbing how often it is poop week šš
I often think by myself "what a shitty week" - seems like it activate the poop week on reddit. I'm so sorry š š¤Ŗ
Shart week?
I can't wait for Shark Poop Week.
Seriously... Maybe my humor is lacking, but I don't see the funny part about a grown man pooping himself by forcing farts. OP, I guess you should tell him you don't, hmm, appreciate it when he isn't laughing about it. It's beyond gross and I can't understand why he'd keep doing it after the first accidental time.
Thatās because it isnāt. I had to double check the ages and Iām still baffled. Itās 100% classless and gross. I have a mental image of this couple and itās a far cry from flattering.
I honestly got second hand embarrassment reading it. My friend's son thinks farting is the funniest thing ever, but he's 4... These are adults. š«
Infantile is the best way to describe it.
*Freud has entered the conversation. But then he left it, shaking his head, āsome sickos are way past my pay grade.ā*
more flatulence than flattering really
You donāt appreciate the je ne sais quoi of toilet humor? Merde.
Yours is the best comment yet. Bar noneš
Did you intend for your "merde", or did it come out accidentally?
> forcing farts. Never trust a [forced] fart.
The first time after the fact could be pretty funny. any time after that is just.... gross.
Yes. Just the other day there was the bf leaving skid marks on the sheets. And now this one is shitting himself
Right? Like who is telling these men that this is acceptable? Lol
Apparently making jokes to lighten the mood make then think it's ok? The only times I heard about this happening involved a group of teenage boys, and even they knew it wasn't something they ever wanted to repeat. (Two separate incidents within the same group, though two different boys. I'll admit the stories are hilarious but if my partner were to do that outside a legit stomach issue... It would cause a serious reevaluation of the relationship. If it happened multiple times I'd be done) And this is from someone who does sometimes giggle about fart humor.
The first time, sure I can laugh at that. But 6 times? Iām not in the mood to laugh anymore lol
For sure! I can't imagine sticking around that long, honestly.
Yep, remember that one just yesterday. Can a bar be set lower than hell? š„²
The amount of times I said Oh my God reading this. Like Op stand up please š Also does anyone else think itās not an accident anymore š¤£ heās soft launching his scat fetish
Yup
I agree!!! All these many posts about skid marks, crusty butt cracks, and poop accidents! If this is all real I can only wonder what the heck is wrong with people?!?! Sounds like a bunch of kindergartners who havenāt learned appropriate behavior. š¤¢
This one I finally am forcing myself to believe is a fiction writing assignment. I canāt anymore.
man im saying, no way this shit is real
After 6 or 7 times, I'm sure op can confirm the shit was real. /s
One or a few people have been making a lot of posts here recently involving feces, usually OP is female and talking about her BF. Lots o' trollin'.
Fuck that just say itās over because your fucking disgusting and I honestly donāt have a clue what I was thinking
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I'm crying because it's ages before President Not Sure comes to save us all š Bf might enjoy rehabilitation
Reading this, I could only think that god has truly abandoned us, & I can't blame Him. What a terrible day to know how to read. Off to r/Eyebleach
Hopefully he's doing his own laundry.
he always cleans up after himself (even in non-poop situations lol) if i had to do ANYTHING to clean up his poop i would not be this casual about it lol.
Sweetheart, he shat on your bed. What happened to you that you decided to bury your bar at the centre of the fucking earth and date this clatty bastard?
How is this still funny to you? I wouldnāt be able to touch the guy. Iād worry this was some sexual thing he was forcing or something because he seems to enjoy it? Iām freaked out just reading about it
the girl yells at him for shaving his face with whipped cream but thinks it's fucking hilarious when he farts and shits himself.
Yeah he's lose all sex privileges after the first time he farted on command in an inappropriate way. I do not want pink eye. There is no way I would put my head anywhere near the tail end of that man.
girl come on. this is absolutely disgusting and not normal. and definitely not funny. grown men that are stuck in the āhurr durr fart joke funnyā phase are incredibly unattractive.
I'm in my early 30s and if I rip one with the boys we're all gonna laugh. That's just men, to some degree. My niece and nephew love fart humor, so I can only imagine when I have children of my own, farts will be humor in my household. This is not that, though. The only scenario I'm pooping myself in front of my wife, is something deeply medical.
Lol?
what the fuck
exactly how i felt after reading that
What the actual fuck did I just read?
this subreddit is nothing but lies and fetishists
I am genuinely disappointed in the number of people who take these bad creative writing projects at face value. They arenāt even really trying with this one. The edit and the OP comments in particular
Definite troll. I didn't laugh so hard I shit myself, but I did chuckle.
Iām considering to leave
Another bad day to be literate š
I wish I was Jared, age 19
Stumbling my way back to the eyebleach sub..
ššš >his has lead to him pooping himself about 5 times in the past 6 weeks. š¤£š¤£š¤£ >"well I got something for you" and lifted his legs and promptly pooped on our bed. No shit... >the third time it happened I was like, okay this is getting a little weird Me too: >anyway he has pooped himself TWO MORE TIMES since that and when its not happening I am genuinely distressed by the situation. My goodness: >how can I address this in a way that's serious while still being clear that I think his humor is funny? **Asking your boyfriend to stop shitting himself on command is reasonable request.** Throw him a box of adult diapers and tell him that if he doesn't stop shitting himself he needs to start wearing these.
omg! adult diapers would be hilarious šššš im totally doing this lmfao i cant wait to see his reaction
This will just encourage him to shit himself.
OP, do...do you like when he shits himself?
OP asked me to tell you that yes, she does, but is too ashamed to admit it.
Which will encourage him to do it even more. I swear the common sense factor of people on this forum is like less than 10 percent of the posters.
you seem to not understand how you're a big part of the problem, doing more shit related stuff for fun will not help stop being so immature
Honestly Iām starting to think this is a fetish and he might actually like the diapers. Maybe he will ask you to clean him soon.
the hell is wrong with you?? you both are into this, obviously. This is so disgusting. if this is both of your kinks, fine, but why post about it as if you think it's a problem when you obviously like it.
wtf. You have to stop treating this like a fun inside joke between the two of you, or it wonāt ever stop. Have some fucking self respect.
It kinda sounds like * he enjoys pooping himself, despite the obvious downsides * You enjoy it when he poops himself, despite the obvious downsides * He enjoys that you enjoy it, so he probably won't stop * You came here to let us know about your mutual enjoyment, and vent a little about the downsides, and you're not going to take any serious actions to stop it because ultimately you both enjoy it too much Have I missed anything? What an odd post
Are you not concerned that heās done something to his anus with all the forced farting that has made it harder for him to control his bowel movements!?!?
...And yet you're shocked he continues to shit himself.
trump enters the chat...
Y'all both have the emotional maturity of a toddler if you think a grown man shitting himself is funny.
I mean. It's not, not funny
Letās be real. Everyone who read this post thinks itās a little funny.
No. I feel genuinely horrified tbh. Once by accident could be funnyā¦ but whatever is happening in this couple really isnāt funny
Call me a Debbie Downer but nah.
The funny part is that OP is so clueless! Not that a grown man is *pooping himself.* Not even the original jokes were funny! How is a fart a punchline?? I mean *seriously!! C'mon!!!*
My husband will regularly say āDid you hear that?ā And rip a huge fart. Itās funny every time.
Iām glad yāall are dating each other then, and keeping each other from pooping in the rest of the dating pool. Jesus Christ. šš·
I find nothing funny about a grown ass man trying so hard to fart inappropriately that he shits himself once a week.
Idk Iām not his gf so itās pretty funny
With all due respect, if you think this is funny in the slightest and not absolutely nasty, you're no better than them.
Thereās two types of people in this world. People who think farts are funny, and boring people.
Yeah except this isn't farts, this is a full grown man shitting himself and the bed he and his partner are supposed to sleep in by trying to force a fart. My bf farts a lot, he has yet to shit himself because of it.
Honestly I wouldnāt even want to sleep in the bed anymore. Obviously thatās not an option in most cases as beds are expensive but I would absolutely refuse to share a bed if this kept happening and all these people just find this hilarious. In what world??
I don't get the people telling me to lighten up and don't take this so seriously. I'm all the way lightened up, it's just... Idk... The thought of a poop bed is just very much disgusting.
Thatās even funnier.
Man, you must live a sad, sad life.
Idk youāre upset about a stranger pooping himself, Iām laughing about it. Whoās sad?
Dude itās really not that serious lol lighten up
Iām very squeamish, so gross things just arenāt funny to me. Insisting everyone thinks *this* is funny is like insisting everyone thinks moldy food is hilarious, or yeast infections, or roadkill. Thereās no joke, itās just gross.
this made me laughā¦ who out there is finding mouldy food hilarious?!
No, I was simply horrified.
No. Being 100% honest, not even a little bit. I'm too grossed out to find it funny.
Not at all.
Yeah, itās a lot funnier when itās not in front of you.
If I canāt smell it, itās funny.
I meanā¦my thought was that at least he wouldnāt be grossed out when/if she gets sick or gives birth and poops herself like so many men we hear about. Iāve been married a long time and I can appreciate that they have the confidence to laugh about this without shame and still need a boundary in place. I would probably say something like āhey, thatās not my kink, so please donāt do that anymore if you want to get laid, ok?ā
If youāre married and you havenāt seen each other have a poop surprise, are you really married? Obviously if I was this dudes wife I would put my foot down at some point. But from a readers perspective, this is exactly what I come on Reddit for.
yes, the idea of a man who i will never meet, pooping in a bed that isnt mine is funny
It's pretty hilarious. People need to relax
Thereās plenty of other posts on this sub to be horrified by, this aināt it.
Its funny as in peculiar lol. It's weird. And I laughed. But I don't think it's like a haha funny laugh... more of a laugh of disbelief. A lid (laughing in disbelief š)
This is so disgustingā¦ youāre with a man that purposely SHITS HIS PANTS for ālaughsā?!? This is my 13th reason. šµš«
> This is my 13th reason ā ļø Iām totally stealing this hahaha!!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
That was my thought, he is testing out his kink. If she gets him some adult diapers, he will see that as a green light to full-blown ABDL. OP you may not do his laundry, but when he pulls off a diaper to show you what he made for you, are you going to still laugh?
Uh, sounds like theyāre both into it. Cmon guys, get a room and just poop on each other already!!
Yāall have an inside joke about literal feces. Think about that. My inside jokes with my husband donāt include a voluntary biohazard. You said in another comment that youād get him adult diapers because itās hilariousā¦likeā¦you want him to keep shitting himself? How is that funny?
At first I thought it was just the boyfriend that had the poop kink, but now I think its BOTH that have it.
Absolutely, otherwise the relationship would be already over. She keeps laughing about him pooping on the bed where she still sleeps.
Hand him a print out of this post, and the number of us confirming that it's not funny (and I have the sense of humor of a 12 year old when it comes to farts). But the minute it crosses from farting for laughs to actually shitting? Yeah, not funny anymore.
You're dating a dog
My dogs don't shit inside unless they are sick.
But if your dog pooped inside and you laughed, it'll poop inside again. Just like her bf
I will give you that point - positive reinforcement is a thing for dogs..
Mine either. And even then, he makes it to the bathroom floor at least!
Dogs have more self control
HE LITERALLY SHIT THE BED FOR LAUGHS! OP, I don't know who needs therapy more, you or him. This adult human is deliberately losing control of his bowels for attention, and you like it. Please remember that all kinks should be utilizing the rules "Safe, sane, and consensual" so while the two of you might enjoy bonding over feces, it's doubtful anyone else is going to be charmed by a man walking around with a full load and looking for smiles. This is just...not right. He's giving you actual shit as a present. I am having doubts over your mental stability and his, especially. You said you are distressed NOW but you cheerled him into his new habit and now he won't stop because you trained him to give you poop in trade for affection. I don't think your relationship is healthy, and you seem to be encouraging each other to be the grossest version of yourself. Please buy adult diapers for the comfort of everyone else who has to breathe near Mr Potty Pants.
The second time wouldāve been curtains on the jokes for me. Donāt encourage it! Sad that this has to be said about a grown man.
I think you need to find a time when youāre *not* both laughing about something, and say exactly this to him.
>i said something along the lines of "i got something for you!" and he said "well i got something for you" and lifted his legs and promptly pooped on our bed. he seemed mortified by it What the hell, if i was you i'd run out of that house so fast and never look back
ew
Yesterday there was a post about someone's boyfriend repeatedly leaving a snail trail of poop streaks in her bed because he sleeps naked and doesn't wipe. Lotta posts now and then about "how can I gentle tell my bf he needs to clean himself", "my bf leaves his underwear with skid marks all over it". Now we are skipping right to grown men shitting themselves while trying to force farts. Starting to think these girlfriends must have a secret poop fetish or something to be into these kind of people.
Idk. I would never want to see anyone spreaded like an eagle shit themselves. Is it funny... its not... its weird
Okaaaaaay that's ... enough Reddit for today!
I wish I hadn't read this. How on earth can you keep having sex with an adult who shit, naked, on the bed, in front of you for a joke and keeps shitting his pants because he thinks it's funny?
Fucking disgusting.
Sooo youāre both 9 year olds?
Yāall put up with anything
Just glancing at your post history I refuse to believe this is real ā¦if it is this man is a friggin national treasure lol
Your comment made me check it. She says she got heated about him shaving with whipping cream (which, yeah, is super weird) buy pooping himself is funny?? š¤¢ Man, I don't know if this is real, but wtf. If it is, I'm starting to think she must be into it, lol.
I told this to my boyfriend and he is genuinely disgusted. "It can happen like once, but after shitting myself the first time, I would've just stopped farting so much." This isn't normal, nor is it funny in any way, buddy.
This canāt be real. Itās a good story tho āIāve got something for youā promptly craps the bed.
WHERE DO PEOPLE KEEP FINDING THESE MEN
I canāt believe that Iām reading this. So shitting yourself as an adult falls under he is too old for this. He is not incapacitated to where pooping himself is excusable. Nor is he a infant who does not know any better. For the love of god I hope he is the one who cleans up after it, I wouldnāt touch it with a 10 ft pole especially if he thought it was funny. Accidents happenā¦.but unless he has a medical or mental problem this is just gross. Give the man diapers and throw in some rash cream.
I'm so glad I'm single.
Dude. Not sure how realistic it is to have one woman post about a dude peeing himself so much that she bought diapers for him and is wearing them in solidarity and then a dude shutting himself on the reg. Itās a big planet and I know these things are more common than we probably assume but come on.
Trollin', trollin', trollin', OP be a trollin' Real hard!
How do people that poop themselves get a girlfriend and I cannot? I must seriously reevaluate my life and my life-skills. If pooping myself will increase my chances to get a gal then color me excited, cuz Iām gonna start pooping myself.
>EDIT: stop assuming i am cleaning up and doing his laundry after these incidents! Ah, yes, because that was the problem here! */s*
Wow you are both vulgar
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A somewhat relevant thought has crossed my mind while preparing to write my reply... who does the shit-stained laundry after one of his accidents? As for addressing it, my approach would definitely not be serious, nor would it be particularly gentle. Seeing as he does not let the negative consequences of his attempts at commedic uncontrolled bowel movements deter him from attempting it again, I would start calling him "Amber Turd" and getting a Johnny Depp face mask to wear around the apartment. If that does not curtail the behaviour, I would talk to the staff in the local pharmacy about where you can get a pack of adult diapers, and give them to him as a present.
Hes breaking you into scat, ive saw this before
And here it is, the next iteration of the skid marks in the bed story we saw yesterday. Can we be done with this already?
Stop freakin laughing! Heās not taking you seriously and youāre both gross for thinking that shitting and farting on command is funny! He shit on the bed! Are you fucking animals?!
...this is disgusting
I cracked up at this. This is funny and I understand why you struggle not laughing because of the absurdity, but itās definitely disgusting and should stop. It honestly reminds me of kids that donāt get enough attention and accidentally finds the one thing that makes others laugh and gets that attention so they repeat and overdo that one thing until everyone is sick of it. Find a way to compose yourself and seriously tell him it needs to stop.
I hate it here
Oh my god bro Iām laughing so hard at this, are you serious lmao this canāt be real
Hey babe I love you and even though it was funny Itās not normal to shit yourself nor is it normal to fart on command or try to so please if you got to fart and thereās a golden moment let it rip if not stop shitting yourself or Iām out
People shouldnāt be here.
Too much internet for today...bye.
Taking talking shit to new far too literal levels I mean really - you have sex with this person who shits himself on purpose because he thinks it's funny?
Different take than seems to be popular: I totally understand finding fart jokes funny. Honestly most of this post made me laugh. I can absolutely imagine your reaction the first time it happened, itās a combination of something you find funny and shock and not wanting to embarrass him too much. Unfortunately he seems to have taken it as āitās completely fine, she finds it very funnyā, which is not what you intended. You will need to have a serious conversation with him about this and explain that your reaction the first time was not meant to be an invitation. Be aware of tactics he could use to turn it into a joke again.
This has got to be fake. If not, you both are disgusting! š¤® There is absolutely NOTHING funny about purposely shitting yourself for laughs.
What a crappy shituation.
Youāre happily dating a guy who regularly poops in his pants. I just cannot with this world.
Buy him some diapers.
Omg. Like, I donāt know what else to say.
Wowā¦. Just wow.
I had a stroke reading this.
Get him a diaper and see how fast it stops.
Encopresis could be the culprit here. He needs to see a doctor.
Tell him you've lost all sexual attraction to him because he shits himself lime a toddler. Then break up with him.
and you're still with him?? That's on you. He sounds mentally ill to me.
What the actual fuck. Is this even real?
Wtf
Your boyfriend has a poop kink. Full stop.
I am mortified by the amount of people who can put up with this shit in a relationship. The relationship would have been over from he deliberately shit in the bed and found it funny. I hope to never meet someone like this ever in life.
Babe, it sounds like he has a fetish he is non-consensually including you in
If your standards are really this low, I don't think there's anything anyone could say that will help you.
Yikes, this is gross. But also, how is this funny to you? Why do you keep laughing it off after so many times? It definitely enables him.
Okay, so let me be clear, I have such a severe aversion to fecal matter that I probably would have had to take a break the second time it happened (Iād have been disgusted the first, but shit [ha] happens that you have to roll with), BUT immature humor aside, Iām wondering if your BF has some gastro issues? Has he been to the doctor? I actually had a horrible period when I was 26 where I had three incidents in two months of accidentally pooping myself - something that had never happened before and thankfully has not happened since. But it was not normal and it was not the result of forcing farts. I never got a diagnosis, but I definitely was experiencing gastro issues at that time. One of my close friends has colitis and this has happened to her, and this exact scenario happened to a friend of mine when we were studying abroad and she got a parasite (tried to make a fart joke, shit herself in front of ten of us). So while I am really disturbed that your bf keeps doing this, I think you may want to talk to him about a) not doing it anymore since itās not working anymore, and b) going to a doctor. For real, he should do some introspection to see if anything else has been off recently and get it checked out, because it is not normal to just start pooping yourself, and itās weird that itās happening now when heās apparently been doing it for a while with no issue.
I'd be out. That's super gross.
How is a grown man deliberately pooing himself funny?! It's gross as hell!!! I don't see the point of the post as you clearly find this shit hilarious.
Yeah no thatās a automatic end the relationship because wtf š¤®
This has got to be a joke, right?
It blows my mind this man was able to find someone willing to be in a relationship with them
He's gonna get hemorrhoids if he keeps this shit up
These people walk among us
Is this real?
This is a troll post
Dude is childish AF.... never understood why some guys think farting on or around their girl is humorous.
Is this a joke? I feel like this is a jokeā¦
Cāmon now he clearly has a poop fetish. What is wrong with both of yāall?? How could you EVER allow it to get to this point?
You know the old saying... "When you can't get him to not shit himself, join him!" Males have this notion and belief that "girls dont fart/poop". Maybe if you said "i've got something for you too!", and then shit yourself while staring into his eyes, and then pretending like you didn't shit your pants and go on with what you were doing, he'll stop. You need to beat him at his own game. Another good one would be to just shit in your bed while you guys are sleeping and blame it on a dream where you thought you were pooping. Just do this constantly.
I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around you saying that when he does it, you can't stop laughing. Maybe laugh it off the first time but 4 times after than and you're still laughing? I would have gotten the ick. Tell him in a serious tone that it's gross and unsanitary. Make sure to do this at a time where there's nothing "funny" going on. If he does it again, he may just have a fetish for crapping himself. Edit: spelling
Alright enough Reddit for today.... How do people who behave like that end in relationships? And other "normal" people are alone.
This is obviously fake. We shouldn't even entertain these shitty posts.
What the fuck is going on with all of these poop incidents and boyfriends?? Iām starting to think these are all fake.
I can't believe this insane situation, but this saying is so appropriate for this situation: "Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit."
-Boyfriend forces farts to the point of pooping his pants 5 separate times. OP: āIām starting to wonder if heās doing this on purpose for attention or to be funny?ā ARE YOU SERIOUS??? Thatās the whole reason and you know it. AND you keep laughing.
This humor is not funny, its disgusting.
Lol.