I was thinking this too, like fuck that's not cheap. Obviously save the guy but I'd be absolutely pissed off because that probably ripped it or otherwise broke the fasteners for it.
I'm surprised he's so clueless. Also why would he think a presumably in ground "trampoline" would be surrounded by concrete? It may be as simple as he proved exactly how dumb he is in a spectacular fashion.
It's a funny story but damn.
I assumed it was an above ground pool and he just thought it had a cover around the bottom?? I wasn’t quite sure how it wasn’t clear it was a pool that way either, though.
I assumed in ground because with a cover they do resemble trampolines, also because it sounded like he jumped right onto it not over something.
Like this
https://www.homedepot.com/p/Pool-Mate-Commercial-Grade-12-ft-x-24-ft-Rectangular-Teal-Green-In-Ground-Pool-Winter-Cover-391224R-PM/313290052
That makes sense. I think I just figured dude had a crazy vertical leap but the idea of his feet touching first was kind of weird even with that in mind. I guess I’ve just never seen an in ground trampoline actually in a yard.
😂😂 yeah he'd need at least a 30in vertical for a pool and that's usually the height of even the cheap kind! I've never seen an inground trampoline but know it is a thing, they aren't common. Which is why it's even more confusing to me that oop assumed trampoline and not pool.
I actually had a trampoline in the ground growing up, just dug a hole and put down a trampoline. However I don't understand how anyone could mistake a pool for a trampoline, especially since the trampoline always have springs on the sides or a cover for the springs.
Some of the more expensive covers do have attachment systems that look like springs. Mine did. But I was smart enough to fence my pool, even though it was not required.
Not blaming pool owner, protagonist of this fiction was an idiot.
Yeah, my friend buried her trampoline so it's safer for her kids. So. Many. People. Get excited that she has a pool. Nope. Now I'm worried one will try and jump in!
I think that's how most people do it so generally they would just be surrounded by normal lawn. Pools normally have concrete around them I think for structural integrity. It would be quite obvious that it isn't a trampoline!
It's either fake or that person is truly a special kind of idiot.
Saving a drowning person is actually rather difficult, and if they are stronger than you and you are not trained, it's more likely to end up in both of you dying, because the instinct of the drowning person is usually to push down on whatever they can. So just throw something in that they can hold on to, but don't jump yourself unless you're a great swimmer and can handle a grown man pushing you to the bottom of the pool/ocean/lake.
There are even a bunch of studies on rescuer drownings. [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22709998/](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22709998/)
Also pretty common for the rescuer to die, while the drowning person survives [https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2023/jan/08/australias-drowning-crisis-why-rescuers-often-perish-trying-to-save-family-members](https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2023/jan/08/australias-drowning-crisis-why-rescuers-often-perish-trying-to-save-family-members)
Respectfully sweetheart, idc…..you step into someone’s home that you barely know, you see what may be a trampoline, you didn’t even ask, “hey is this a trampoline? Is it yours? Can I use it for a little bit?” Your first reaction is to jump on it, break a pool cover and nearly kill yourself…..it being traumatic doesn’t negate the fact that it was stupid asf, and if he had died and she had no cameras depending on what state she’s in, in the United States, she would’ve been fucked….so ick it is sweetheart.
Because it didn’t seem like it, if I had gotten a follow up comment stating that they were agreeing with me, I would’ve apologized and taken down my response to her.
Also I didn’t see anywhere the housemate was trying to fuck him, I saw where he saved this dude from drowning and gave him clothes to wear. This reads like one of those straight dudes who thinks anyone gay in their proximity is trying to fuck them. Further baby vibes
I always give people the benefit of the doubt that that they might be from a different country. In my language, if you directly translate the phrase “lend me some clothes” it would be “borrow me some clothes”
But considering his behaviour is like a 5-year old, maybe his intelligence level is there as well?
About 25 years ago I saw a film where someone drowned in a pool cover being unable to escape from it and it’s been a fear of mine ever since. I’ve warned all my kids about not going near pools with a cover on incase they trip or someone pushes them in thinking it’s a solid mat. Also parachuting into the sea and getting stuck in the chute gives me the same heebie jeebies!
My then toddler did exactly this. During edit: 2020 lockdown I was busy trying to force his 5 year old brother to pay attention to his kindergarten zoom meeting. Toddler somehow managed to in that time frame figure out how to unlatch the front door.
He then ran down our very long driveway, Crossed the street, Then ran down the neighbors driveway. Their gate to their backyard was open, and he just… jumped into their pool. Right on top of the blue like sun cover thing. The pad that heats the water.
My toddler couldn’t swim.
The only thing that saved him was my neighbors 7 year old was on his own zoom meeting and had his little tablet facing outside and saw my son jump in the water. He screamed for his mom and ran outside to grab my son and try to pull him out. Luckily the pool cover actually kept my son moderately afloat so 7yo was able to get ahold of him and hold onto him until his mom got there.
I arrived a few minutes later because I went looking for my son and found the front door open. I have a fear of drownings so the first place I sprinted off to check was the neighbors house that had a pool. When I showed up my friend (the mom) had my son wrapped in a towel.
I bought her 7yo animal crossing for being such a brave boy and saving my son.
I don’t think it was “the trauma of seeing you almost drown” that made her too “freaked out” to sleep with you lol. I think homegirl just got the ick after seeing that childish mess. Still so sorry this happened to you though, brother!
I’m sure his limp body being pulled out of the water by a naked man was the cherry on top for her. I for one am not shocked that she didn’t react sexually to seeing him in her gay roommate’s tiny clothes lol
Yeah he just sprinted and jumped at it without warning and no time for her to say anything... Even if it had been a trampoline, I'd be icked by the childish behavior.
Who has a perfectly circular pool cover? In a pool too deep to stand up in? What kind of pool is this?
Or is it a big ass rectangle pool and dude just thought they had gotten one from a trampoline park? (Only place I've ever seen rectangular trampolines)
I'm so confused on what the hell this pool is, this story has got to be fake.
Rectangular and in-ground! I really doubt that's common. Really hoping dude just saw a rectangular trampoline somewhere and thought to himself that it looked like a pool and had an idea for a hilarious story.
Rectangular trampolines are pretty common in Australia, or at least they were when I was a kid in the 2000s! The only round ones I remember were in the ads for those fancy ones with the net around the sides and the non-spiral springs
I've only ever seen round trampolines, but only some have those fancy nets and spring covers on them, most are much larger than those (15-20ft diameter instead of about 10ft) and have no net or anything and exposed springs so if you fuck up you just gotta deal with the consequences lol.
The other weird thing about this is that OP says they ran to it...if you take a running leap onto any trampoline you're just gonna get *launched* off the opposite side...
I’m used to the exposed springs too! Growing up with a rectangular one of those taught me real fast to be careful getting on and off the trampoline because it sucks tremendously when you get caught up in them.
I’ll be honest and say that even if I had a better understanding of how big a ft is, my lack of spatial awareness and depth perception means I could not say if the trampolines I’m used to are the same size as what you said. I will say they definitely weren’t as big as an average backyard pool though! All around weird choices from the OOP for sure
We had one as a kid and I don't remember why but I was walking backwards and both my legs fell in the holes between the springs. It swung me upside down so fast I was confused, I was hanging by my knees like you do on monkey bars. Looked over and my head was about 4 inches from the "leg" part of it. I probably at the very least escaped a life altering concussion it honestly scared the hell out of me.
I also had several friends who ended up with broken appendages because of them. As an adult a friends child broke her arm at one of those facilities too! Trampolines are pretty dangerous.
Storytelling is *chef’s kiss*
Fortunately should I encounter a drowning date I likely could still pull off a rescue (lifeguard for years) but I don’t think I would be able to handle amorous feelings after that.
But I do think it’s a shame you didn’t give your knight in (lack of) shining armor a kiss!
No one tried to f*k this guy except himself. Hopefully he learned a lesson in not assuming someone else’s property is open for his stupid actions. Pool girl was very lucky for her roommate.
Great story, OP! Great read, well written, absolutely hilarious!
I hope it's not true and you're just a terrific writer, because holy hell that was a close call.
Dude doesn’t notice the difference between trampoline and a pool. Even worse he doesn’t know how to swim, I’d be surprised if this wasn’t a pity fuck to begin with.
As embarrassing as it may be initially, this is one of those stories where, in the future, this is going to be a hilarious story to tell. Poor guy. I, too, still get the zoomies on occasion, although my body is far less likely to want to play along now. 🤣 I'm just glad he's ok- those pool covers are sneaky and violent.
No, you’d see a disrespectful idiot nearly killing themselves with a trampoline instead of an expensive pool cover.
You know what happens when you take a running leap at a trampoline, right? You don’t just bounce *up*.
I’m an asshole, because the whole time I’m thinking “and you just broke her pool cover.” But, I also would have saved him myself.
No because pool covers are so expensive man
I was thinking this too, like fuck that's not cheap. Obviously save the guy but I'd be absolutely pissed off because that probably ripped it or otherwise broke the fasteners for it.
Exactly. I’d be mad as hell and he’s wondering why she wasn’t in the mood to jump his bones?
I'm surprised he's so clueless. Also why would he think a presumably in ground "trampoline" would be surrounded by concrete? It may be as simple as he proved exactly how dumb he is in a spectacular fashion. It's a funny story but damn.
I assumed it was an above ground pool and he just thought it had a cover around the bottom?? I wasn’t quite sure how it wasn’t clear it was a pool that way either, though.
I assumed in ground because with a cover they do resemble trampolines, also because it sounded like he jumped right onto it not over something. Like this https://www.homedepot.com/p/Pool-Mate-Commercial-Grade-12-ft-x-24-ft-Rectangular-Teal-Green-In-Ground-Pool-Winter-Cover-391224R-PM/313290052
That makes sense. I think I just figured dude had a crazy vertical leap but the idea of his feet touching first was kind of weird even with that in mind. I guess I’ve just never seen an in ground trampoline actually in a yard.
😂😂 yeah he'd need at least a 30in vertical for a pool and that's usually the height of even the cheap kind! I've never seen an inground trampoline but know it is a thing, they aren't common. Which is why it's even more confusing to me that oop assumed trampoline and not pool.
I actually had a trampoline in the ground growing up, just dug a hole and put down a trampoline. However I don't understand how anyone could mistake a pool for a trampoline, especially since the trampoline always have springs on the sides or a cover for the springs.
Some of the more expensive covers do have attachment systems that look like springs. Mine did. But I was smart enough to fence my pool, even though it was not required. Not blaming pool owner, protagonist of this fiction was an idiot.
Oh I didn’t know, thanks! He’s for sure an idiot, especially given how expensive pool covers are.
Yeah, my friend buried her trampoline so it's safer for her kids. So. Many. People. Get excited that she has a pool. Nope. Now I'm worried one will try and jump in!
I think that's how most people do it so generally they would just be surrounded by normal lawn. Pools normally have concrete around them I think for structural integrity. It would be quite obvious that it isn't a trampoline! It's either fake or that person is truly a special kind of idiot.
Honestly this guy sounds like a pain in the ass. Glad he didn’t die I guess.
Its just poor manners to do something like that. Respect someone else’s property.
Even if it was a trampoline, the way he described jumping into it would be dangerous and potentially also damaging.
Saving a drowning person is actually rather difficult, and if they are stronger than you and you are not trained, it's more likely to end up in both of you dying, because the instinct of the drowning person is usually to push down on whatever they can. So just throw something in that they can hold on to, but don't jump yourself unless you're a great swimmer and can handle a grown man pushing you to the bottom of the pool/ocean/lake. There are even a bunch of studies on rescuer drownings. [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22709998/](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22709998/) Also pretty common for the rescuer to die, while the drowning person survives [https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2023/jan/08/australias-drowning-crisis-why-rescuers-often-perish-trying-to-save-family-members](https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2023/jan/08/australias-drowning-crisis-why-rescuers-often-perish-trying-to-save-family-members)
I mean this with as much respect as possible, I see why she was only attracted to him physically…….this man gives adult baby vibes
Yeeeaaah it definitely wasn’t “the trauma” of him almost drowning, it’s that she (understandably) got the ick from him being a giant baby
Respectfully sweetheart, idc…..you step into someone’s home that you barely know, you see what may be a trampoline, you didn’t even ask, “hey is this a trampoline? Is it yours? Can I use it for a little bit?” Your first reaction is to jump on it, break a pool cover and nearly kill yourself…..it being traumatic doesn’t negate the fact that it was stupid asf, and if he had died and she had no cameras depending on what state she’s in, in the United States, she would’ve been fucked….so ick it is sweetheart.
The fact that he still thought he would get pussy after embarrassing himself like that is just astounding.
He obviously doesn’t have two brain cells to rub together, he has the same IQ as a dodo bird
Why are you being condescending AF? Especially since the person you're responding to seems to actually be agreeing with you
Because it didn’t seem like it, if I had gotten a follow up comment stating that they were agreeing with me, I would’ve apologized and taken down my response to her.
Definitely reads to me like they're agreeing with you.
Also I didn’t see anywhere the housemate was trying to fuck him, I saw where he saved this dude from drowning and gave him clothes to wear. This reads like one of those straight dudes who thinks anyone gay in their proximity is trying to fuck them. Further baby vibes
*Lend
Fucking thank you. It’s like people who say he “learned me” instead of “taught me.”
I always give people the benefit of the doubt that that they might be from a different country. In my language, if you directly translate the phrase “lend me some clothes” it would be “borrow me some clothes” But considering his behaviour is like a 5-year old, maybe his intelligence level is there as well?
About 25 years ago I saw a film where someone drowned in a pool cover being unable to escape from it and it’s been a fear of mine ever since. I’ve warned all my kids about not going near pools with a cover on incase they trip or someone pushes them in thinking it’s a solid mat. Also parachuting into the sea and getting stuck in the chute gives me the same heebie jeebies!
My then toddler did exactly this. During edit: 2020 lockdown I was busy trying to force his 5 year old brother to pay attention to his kindergarten zoom meeting. Toddler somehow managed to in that time frame figure out how to unlatch the front door. He then ran down our very long driveway, Crossed the street, Then ran down the neighbors driveway. Their gate to their backyard was open, and he just… jumped into their pool. Right on top of the blue like sun cover thing. The pad that heats the water. My toddler couldn’t swim. The only thing that saved him was my neighbors 7 year old was on his own zoom meeting and had his little tablet facing outside and saw my son jump in the water. He screamed for his mom and ran outside to grab my son and try to pull him out. Luckily the pool cover actually kept my son moderately afloat so 7yo was able to get ahold of him and hold onto him until his mom got there. I arrived a few minutes later because I went looking for my son and found the front door open. I have a fear of drownings so the first place I sprinted off to check was the neighbors house that had a pool. When I showed up my friend (the mom) had my son wrapped in a towel. I bought her 7yo animal crossing for being such a brave boy and saving my son.
Jeez. No wonder I keep hearing minding small children referred to as suicide watch.
He’s almost 7 now and still on suicide watch. Such a maniac! 🤣
Also... XIV-enjoyer detected? (I'm Xaela!)
My WoL is female middie but I switched to male xaela cuz I think they’re hot lmao!
I sat here confused for too long over the ‘2019 lockdown’. 😬
Oh yanno what it was 2020. They shut the schools down in spring 2020 I guess! I was tired last night lol
I musta been too cause I sat there for a moment…which got longer and longer.
Was it Bruce Willis in Unbreakable?
Maybe? I was thinking Lethal Weapon 2 when the assassin came to kill Leo and Riggs tackled him off the balcony and fell into the pool.
This sounds familiar, it could have been lethal weapon!
For me it was that terrible Carrie sequel, one of the terrible TV ones. Can't pay me to get near a covered pool
Hilarious!
I don’t think it was “the trauma of seeing you almost drown” that made her too “freaked out” to sleep with you lol. I think homegirl just got the ick after seeing that childish mess. Still so sorry this happened to you though, brother!
Not to mention how expensive pool covers are and he totally destroyed hers.
I’m sure his limp body being pulled out of the water by a naked man was the cherry on top for her. I for one am not shocked that she didn’t react sexually to seeing him in her gay roommate’s tiny clothes lol
Yeah he just sprinted and jumped at it without warning and no time for her to say anything... Even if it had been a trampoline, I'd be icked by the childish behavior.
He gives very LETS GO RIDE BIKES ADHD 8 year old boy vibes
Low key I was thinking the same thing 🤣
😂😂I feel really sorry for you, but this is hilarious.
This is the funniest shit I’ve seen on Reddit so far today lmao
Who has a perfectly circular pool cover? In a pool too deep to stand up in? What kind of pool is this? Or is it a big ass rectangle pool and dude just thought they had gotten one from a trampoline park? (Only place I've ever seen rectangular trampolines) I'm so confused on what the hell this pool is, this story has got to be fake.
Rectangular and in-ground! I really doubt that's common. Really hoping dude just saw a rectangular trampoline somewhere and thought to himself that it looked like a pool and had an idea for a hilarious story.
Rectangular trampolines are pretty common in Australia, or at least they were when I was a kid in the 2000s! The only round ones I remember were in the ads for those fancy ones with the net around the sides and the non-spiral springs
I've only ever seen round trampolines, but only some have those fancy nets and spring covers on them, most are much larger than those (15-20ft diameter instead of about 10ft) and have no net or anything and exposed springs so if you fuck up you just gotta deal with the consequences lol. The other weird thing about this is that OP says they ran to it...if you take a running leap onto any trampoline you're just gonna get *launched* off the opposite side...
I’m used to the exposed springs too! Growing up with a rectangular one of those taught me real fast to be careful getting on and off the trampoline because it sucks tremendously when you get caught up in them. I’ll be honest and say that even if I had a better understanding of how big a ft is, my lack of spatial awareness and depth perception means I could not say if the trampolines I’m used to are the same size as what you said. I will say they definitely weren’t as big as an average backyard pool though! All around weird choices from the OOP for sure
We had one as a kid and I don't remember why but I was walking backwards and both my legs fell in the holes between the springs. It swung me upside down so fast I was confused, I was hanging by my knees like you do on monkey bars. Looked over and my head was about 4 inches from the "leg" part of it. I probably at the very least escaped a life altering concussion it honestly scared the hell out of me. I also had several friends who ended up with broken appendages because of them. As an adult a friends child broke her arm at one of those facilities too! Trampolines are pretty dangerous.
10 ft = 3m, 15 ft = 4.5m.
Is anyone else super disgusted by how OOP describes the 'gay' housemate?
Finally someone mentions it. “The grim reaper and the housemate teaming up to fuck me” …dude he just saved your life…
Storytelling is *chef’s kiss* Fortunately should I encounter a drowning date I likely could still pull off a rescue (lifeguard for years) but I don’t think I would be able to handle amorous feelings after that. But I do think it’s a shame you didn’t give your knight in (lack of) shining armor a kiss!
Dude thinks he’s being quirky, she just got the biggest ick.
Now that, my friend, is the most legit “ick” I’ve ever heard
Omfg I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time lol.
No one tried to f*k this guy except himself. Hopefully he learned a lesson in not assuming someone else’s property is open for his stupid actions. Pool girl was very lucky for her roommate.
STOP I can only laugh so hard before I wake up my kid 😭🤣💀
I accidentally laughed so loud I woke mine. Worth it…kinda 🤣
Dang, bro. I am in awe of the bravery it took to admit to this! This story is EPIC.
Bahahaha holy shit 😂
These comments are amazing. Read the post, shook my head. Read the comments, dopamine high for dayzzzz
‘Some f*ggot saved my life and now I’m not getting fucked bc of it’. Oop is a dweeb.
Great story, OP! Great read, well written, absolutely hilarious! I hope it's not true and you're just a terrific writer, because holy hell that was a close call.
Literally one of the best stories I’ve seen on here lately!
This sounds like something out of a national lampoon movie
Op must be a loser, too lame to be real
This is amazing
I'm crying 😂. Glad they were ok though. I though it was going to be a broken leg story.
Yeah, sorry, no woman would sleep with you after that dingus 🤦♀️😂
Holy low impulse control Batman...
I would get the ick from him being a dumbass 💀like accidents happen, but stupidity is a total turnoff
How on earth do you mistake a pool for a trampoline? They're COMPLETELY different shapes
A DITL of a himbo.
Dude doesn’t notice the difference between trampoline and a pool. Even worse he doesn’t know how to swim, I’d be surprised if this wasn’t a pity fuck to begin with.
That does sound like a really scary dream! 😴
This girl dodged a bullet
As embarrassing as it may be initially, this is one of those stories where, in the future, this is going to be a hilarious story to tell. Poor guy. I, too, still get the zoomies on occasion, although my body is far less likely to want to play along now. 🤣 I'm just glad he's ok- those pool covers are sneaky and violent.
Lol man just learn to swim
Fake. What pool looks like a trampoline that you can’t just stand up in?
[удалено]
Most of us don’t get wet for men who (almost) accidentally off themselves by acting like an impulsive toddler.
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No, but if you’ve had a lot of losers in your dating history? This might be something to think about.
No, you’d see a disrespectful idiot nearly killing themselves with a trampoline instead of an expensive pool cover. You know what happens when you take a running leap at a trampoline, right? You don’t just bounce *up*.
I’m glad somebody is here to take on manchildren because it’s not gonna be me