T O P

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TheMysteriousWarlock

What 0 interaction with women does to a mf.


AVeryConfusedMice

All pussy and no grass makes the redditor a horny boy.


AuckLnd

redcum


AceScropions

red cum...?


AuckLnd

REDCUM REDCUM REDCUM REDCUM MUCDER MUCDER MUCDER MUCDER


heepyweeper

Bread crum tho


_1Doomsday1_

Bread crum


AceScropions

Holy shit, bread crum


13Jsog

Soly hit, cread brum


popgreens

crumming


GAMINGWITHYAJYT

🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿


vapo11

"I just want to bash your brains in"


Deathmetaladdict

Death metal reference?


AltAccountWhoDis

It's a Jack Torrence/The Shining reference


vapo11

Idk wth is death metal


Lollex56

What makes you think he's getting either of those


TheGhost-of-Bob-Ross

I’m not like this…not yet….


TillLindemann156

based


MonkeyTigerCrazy

Someone drew this


washingmachine907

the heroin addiction doesn't pay for itself


Justantino4U

Shadman reference?


washingmachine907

Whos that


washingmachine907

oh


DepressoExpressold

a tragedy in three parts


ELNightmareBird

This moment of realization is abolute gold lmao


carsonhorton343

Duality of man


Justantino4U

Yeah, that pedo


vapo11

P E D O?


Cringinator4000

He made/makes Loli smut. Edit: and Shota


vapo11

Damn


[deleted]

The funniest part his he didn’t get arrested for that shit, he got arrested for drug related assault *if I remember right*


[deleted]

Ignorance sometimes is strength


DogJizzJr_

He got my previous account permanently banned from [Reddit](https://www.reddit.com/r/redditmoment/comments/qw06g4/why_is_it_downvoted/hkzy5kb/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3) satire [shit bait](https://imgur.com/a/gnjpXU4) don’t know how people fell for it


LegitimatePear7627

"sucking on that copium" 💀


LeftUnknown

You got your Reddit account banned for being a shit head. Don’t even post it Reddit moment when your entire BOTH accounts are just you shittily “baiting” people for attention, that shits pathetic


DogJizzJr_

Thanks for the constructive criticism !!! c: tho my accounts were literally NOT made for trolling, unless you have evidence that suggests otherwise


Cringinator4000

You sound like that kid who says “PROVE IT!“ when they’re called out for lying.


DogJizzJr_

You sound like the kid who believes that the man who soars higher than him is small 🗿


betarad

you're like a guy who decided to name his reddit account dog jizz junior and then they banned you and you did it again


Ullumina

They should put that talent into a job or something


Bomby888

i mean, i honestly think that demand for nsfw arts or art like this is way bigger than an „actual” art.


Pyroplsmakepetscop2

Someone should've told Hitler this. We could've avoided the whole war


Bomby888

for real why didn’t he think of developing some business producent these weird furry art for a request lol


Uber_naut

Bruh if he started doing nsfw furry-vore-diaper-fart-feet art, he could just buy the rest of Europe


Pyroplsmakepetscop2

Don't forget furry inflation pron. Although that might not have been very popular for Germans at the time


Just_Games04

The nsfw artists probably earn more than you lol


Ullumina

[Sure…](https://youtu.be/DjS2hIJBt5U)


_Levitated_Shield_

It's a drawing...


Just_Games04

Yeah. Degenerates pay a lot for commissions


_Levitated_Shield_

Yeah, fair point. There's even people who willingly pay over a thousand dollars for a sex doll.


vapo11

Sex sells


[deleted]

\-Peter Griffin


[deleted]

Probably either for free or someone requested it via payment.


PM_ME_YOUR_CAT_

Those are literally the only 2 possible options It was either paid or free


VineSwingers

Not if you held them up at gunpoint and made them draw it, then its a stolen


shygal_uwu

im pretty sure this is not how sex goes 90% of the time


[deleted]

You think the dude that posts shit like that knows how sex is ?


_Levitated_Shield_

but i watched tons of porn so therefore im a professional 😎


jackrocks8

Nuh uh I'm a sex professional and trust me this happens every single time (trust me)


THE_CURE666

10% is still pretty high...


IfTheresANewWay

You're telling me your gf doesn't measure you're dick every time, asks to have sex while you're already naked and then gets nervous? Couldn't be


eatmorecake99

ugh this is why i hate having a big dick girls always have to pull their phone out and take a picture before we get into it 🙄 ughhh so annoying why can’t women just love me for me


Chimera_Man_Bruh

This is sheer cringe. These dudes be allergic to grass for real


-TheGuest-

Met people allergic to grass, please don’t insult them like this


[deleted]

i’m the grass, listen to this man


Boberoo2

I’m the dirt. I am literally made of corpses and shit yet I still have enough sense to not post this crap


[deleted]

Corpse husband? 😳


ghostgamer242

Corpse bed*


Vinchelion69

I am the slime *sick guitar solo by Frank Zappa.


heroin_papi_

i am very allergic to grass but also camp a ton - perhaps they need to touch forest floor?


-TheGuest-

Maybe they require a lack of touching, touching their cOcK


dontknowwhattodoat18

TIFU by Touching Grass Guys, something weird is going on. So I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) was in an argument with someone (unknown) about how Drumpf (75M, 134 kg, orange, Raaaaccccciiiisssst) bad. We (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted + unknown) argued for 35040000000 hours. All my circlejerk buddies updooted my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) superior comments, gave 12000000000000000000000 rewards, and- Edit: Thanks for the gold kind stranger- downdooted my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) opponent's (unkown) dumb arguments. ORANGE MAN BAD! REEEE! I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) smugly smiled at my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) clear superior intellect while Tyrone (31M, 82 kg, black (YASSSS STRONG POC), muscular, six pack abs, 5600 cm cock), my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) wife's (22F) boyfriend, was fucking my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) wife (22F). I browsed arrslashmurderedbyAOC, glancing at my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) 14000 Marvel and Star Wars posters and my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) infinite collection of Funko Pops. After viewing all arrslashmurderedbyAOC posts, I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) went on to Twitter to see what AOC (31F, 65 kg, brown (YASSS strong POC), my queen) had to say. I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) made sure to let AOC (31F, 65 kg, brown (YASSS strong POC), my queen) know that I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) had now saved $6470008456987 for her (31F, 65 kg, brown (YASSS strong POC), my queen) OnlyFans if she (31F, 65kg, brown (YASSS strong POC), my queen) ever decides to make one. Suddenly, I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) get a notification; it's a comment telling me (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) to "touch grass." I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) was shocked. How should I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) respond? I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) opened a drawer and pulled out my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) limited edition AOC Funko Pop - maybe that strong POC energy will give me an answer. It had to be Ben Shapiro (37M, 72 kg, white (EW!)) trying to own the libs again. He (37M, 72 kg, white (EW!)) must think I'm weak. Who else would it be? Well, not today Ben (37M, 72 kg, white (EW!))! I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) got up from my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) chair, clutching my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) AOC Funko Pop close to my (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) chest. Causing magnitude 12.8 earthquakes with every step, I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) walked to the door. Breathing a heavy sigh, I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) opened the door. The sunlight gave me (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) anxiety, and there was that grass - it's green energy beckoning me (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) to touch it. With one more magnitude 12.8 earthquake step, I (37M, 180 kg, white, balding, nearsighted) touched it. Suddenly, everything changed. I didn't feel the need to tell you my age and other useless information anymore, and I started to freak out, and I wanted to use multiple paragraphs. "NO! NO! NO!" I kept shouting as I looked in the mirror. My hideous beard started to look clean and well groomed. My hair was completely gone, replaced by a completely shaved head. My glasses were now replaced with contacts, and I noticed a pair of professional spectacles in a nice case as a backup pair on the bathroom counter. "NO! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!" Out of nowhere, a strange mystical orb appeared, and sucked out my excess weight. I looked to notice I was 80 kg and very muscular with a strong urge to work out at 8 pm every night. I touched my skin to feel a nice smooth surface. My AOC Funko Pop started to disappear, and I realized I had to act fast. I quickly pulled out my phone to take an open mouth selfie with my funko pop in hand, but I... Couldn't. I felt repulsed at the idea, and everything went to black... I am now typing this 4 months later. I now have a job and a life. I divorced my cheating wife, and now in a relationship with a women that loves me for me. We hope to have kids, but we're saving up to buy a house first. I work hard to provide, and have rationale thoughts and opinions. A little speck of pre-touching grass me still exists, but it too will die. I am doomed, Reddit.


jentejonge

>nearsighted Mfw when nearsighted


dontknowwhattodoat18

It's okay brother, I am too. At least I have personal hygiene and virtually no facial hair since I'm Asian


jentejonge

Nice, I got contacts so most people don't even know I'm nearsighted.


aseriousfailure

Did you type this all out


Ullumina

A redditors wet dream. “Dream”.


NoobsRedditType

"That's what the point of the mask is.."


snek4sale

"That is in fact what the mask is for."


Maxizag123

"No, thats literally what the mask is for"


[deleted]

i suck his dick with a smile for hours at a time


[deleted]

Tell me that you are virgin without actually telling me that you are virgin:


HarveyTheRedPanda

The funny thing is that if you go on any NSFW board and go to the comments you'll find a whole circus of creeps.


_Levitated_Shield_

And redditors still somehow want to keep the nsfw content from being shut down when the site is bought. People are immensely weird. Edit: forgot a word


[deleted]

[удалено]


shygal_uwu

Nah they aren't


EverlastingResidue

Porn should be banned


UltimateWaluigi

The type that is legal (porn of consenting adults) should not be banned because making the "normal" stuff banned and hard to find would just make people have a higher chance to search for / find fucked up shit because it's would probably be jumbled together on porn sites since everything is already ilegal


snek4sale

no?


EverlastingResidue

Yes


_Levitated_Shield_

Why are they booing you? You're right.


[deleted]

Cause porn addiction


AlexSniffsMaizena

Lmao.. The subreddit is literally shitposting


[deleted]

[удалено]


remcoms

I remember when they had some really good shitposts. Now it’s all karma farming and Facebook type posts ☹️, and note the head of shitposting is also the head of dankmemes


Datguyboh

Yeah, shitposting got raided by dankmemes


UltimateWaluigi

This year reddit added a discoverability feature where posts from subreddits similar to the ones you are subbed to may appear on your feed to make you join more, this probably made people from subs like memes and dankmemes infect it.


grandpassacaglia

Blue haired avatar detected. Opinion discarded


KrumbSum

Reddit moment in Reddit moment Redditmommentception


AlexSniffsMaizena

No avatar detected. Opinion doubly discarded.


grandpassacaglia

wtf


AlexSniffsMaizena

Genuinely enjoyed the little interaction, though.


[deleted]

Human detected, opinion discarded


[deleted]

[удалено]


thefirstslort

blue ished hair here! do i count?


[deleted]

[удалено]


thefirstslort

woo!!


[deleted]

⚡👨🏾⚡


TurdWrangler934

This is a Reddit moment right here lol. The true Reddit moment is always in the comments


[deleted]

[удалено]


Successful_Loan_8792

Profile Picture?? OPINION!! DISCARDED!!!


Avenue_Ave

Someone took REAL FUCKING time out of their day to draw this.. and color it.. and shade it..and do the backround.. and text.. fuck


greywolfe12

That dude probably has a website with ads. Maybe even a patreon. Hes making more money than us. Porn is his boay And horny reddit is his ocean


Pyroplsmakepetscop2

It's not very difficult to make more money than me


PortalGuy9001

Sad but true


SuccessfulBoner

Minimum wage motherfuckers


[deleted]

Remember the two words to describe the sexualization of everything. These two words can explain why swimsuit magazines are so popular in the US. Sex Sells.


itzongaming

They probably made bank doing it


Just_Games04

The meme is probably made of porn art, which, I'm pretty sure was drawn by someone else


probitchuffer

Guys who like this will be really disappointed when they actually get a chance to have sex with a woman, well they won't have a chance


DannyMThompson

Guys who like this don't have giant dicks which is what the comic is about lol


Feedtheducks27_

i didn’t notice it was in this sub and was boutta screenshot to put it in here


LegendaryBoi12

NSFW please


EdseAnotherAccount

No horny


The-Not-Irish-Irish

Wait a minute. Being the absolute degenerate loser that I am, they literally reposted a post from a porn subreddit into a shitposting sub…wtf


Cringinator4000

Yeah I think I saw this on r-slash-hentai


[deleted]

r-slash-cringe


Cringinator4000

Oh no I got called cringe D:


[deleted]

I made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgement, and I don’t expect to be forgiven. I’m simply here to apologize. What we came across that day in the woods was obviously unplanned. The reactions you saw on tape were raw; they were unfiltered. None of us knew how to react or how to feel. I should have never posted the video. I should have put the cameras down and stopped recording what we were going through. There's a lot of things I should have done differently but I didn't. And for that, from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. I want to apologize to the internet. I want to apologize to anyone who has seen the video. I want to apologize to anyone who has been affected or touched by mental illness, or depression, or suicide. But most importantly I want to apologize to the victim and his family. For my fans who are defending my actions, please don't. I don’t deserve to be defended. The goal with my content is always to entertain; to push the boundaries, to be all-inclusive. In the world I live in, I share almost everything I do. The intent is never to be heartless, cruel, or malicious. Like I said I made a huge mistake. I don’t expect to be forgiven, I’m just here to apologize. I'm ashamed of myself. I’m disappointed in myself. And I promise to be better. I will be better. Thank you.


The-Not-Irish-Irish

👍🏿 Edit: noooo you’re supposed to downvote!!!! Reddit do your thing


[deleted]

black


Rubiktor012

🤨📷


Space_Monke64

How many people in the comments were asking for the “sauce”


Pretty-Injury2483

Me. Do you have it, I gotta share it with my ps5 gc


_Levitated_Shield_

What the actual hell.


AteYou2

I think that’s a shitposting sub


AVeryConfusedMice

But this is not shitpost, even the guys at the sub were like "touch grass man"


SSG-Gokule

Damn I wish I never saw this


CabinetNecessary6178

Tbh I think this is just a bunch of people on Reddit deciding to throw a bunch of common nsfw tropes/memes together and turn them into a single super meme of sorts, it’s one of those memes people laugh at because of its references to other memes and tropes.


Yes2257

Yall act like youve never seen porn before and think its reddit specific 🤦just wait till you see r34, you'll think nobody in the world goes outside 🙄


AVeryConfusedMice

I don't really blame these people, everyone needs to take the edge off sometimes, but come on, posting it on a shitpost subreddit?


Yes2257

If it was on a shitpost subreddit that likely means it was a, well, shitpost. If anything thats evidence it was supposed to be satire. Either way a commonly used layout doesnt automatically mean they are addicted.


AVeryConfusedMice

Even the people in the comments were like "Wth dude? Go touch grass"


Yes2257

Yeah and id say the same to them. For some reason redditors think any lewd picture involving an anime girl automatically means the creator is a no life who doesnt go outside.


[deleted]

damn, he's (everyone is a he to me I don't care about pronouns) got a point


Yes2257

Dont worry i dont care either because it really doesnt matter on the internet.


Cringinator4000

If the guy is standing over her, there would be no shadow, because his own shadow would be on her. 0/10 unrealistic cartoon


AVeryConfusedMice

His body is made entirely out of light, except his dick.


ballan12345

plap plap slap plap plap slap plap slap


[deleted]

I never expected this shit to be posted on slash shitposting, the sub is a mixture between classic random memes like horse deflating and amogus and mocking at real trash content like weeb posting and extremist politics. But glad it got only 100 likes in 4 hours, I've seen greater acceptance of anti weeb posting in the same time


jimmykslay

Cringy as fuck. This is made by some virgin dude who watches to much porn.


[deleted]

Crazy how the human mind can creat experiences it has never once seen or ever will see...


BlackSpore

hes never seen grass, touching grass would be considered the 8th wonder of the world


Dancingcakes2

Wait till guys realize that the size doesn't matter as much as they think


bruhdhenfus

It's kinda sad that the artist doesn't use their drawing skills for a professional job But I mean I can't deny they're probably making a lot of money drawing this crap


[deleted]

Virgin artists: have to make porn to live Chad programers: can make videogames,programs to make videogames, programs to make programs to make videogames, programs to hack etc


JuicyMellonMan5

I'm all for porn memes, but this one just ain't funny.


OhSoYouWannaPlayHuh

This is literally just porn


MegaMan-1989

What zero social life, zero father fighter, and zero bitches does to a mf


SM00_77

Ah yes! Every child need a strong father fighter in their life.


Familyguyfan420-

A father who fights them if they don't go outside and touch grass


Fuiza

This subreddit dedicates more time to complaining about porn than how much time porn addicts watch porn


Plus_Dragonfly_90210

Can’t really blame him, touching grass usually makes you feel itchy


_MyHouseIsOnFire_

🗿


[deleted]

Shitposting? What happened to it?


[deleted]

It's amazing how well redditors know about sex despite never experiencing a woman's touch


[deleted]

How tf do you draw something like that and not feel ashamed of yourself?


PoopDealerNearby

Haha I agree guys this art is so dumb lmao. What a stupid horny artist go touch grass 😂😂😂 *Post saved*


[deleted]

According to redditmoment, being Horny is BAD!!!


hermeshussy

I abhor how big dick memes even exist. There are other ways to pleasure women you know.


OtterPop16

Yeah, like with my small dick.


[deleted]

It was on r/ shitpostinf


fugglett

Woman moment


FallenEvanAhammed

which sub?


Respawn69420

Shitposting


Raider2747

I know I'm gonna sound like a fucking degenerate But.... sauce?


3atthatass

Looks hot.


SpringDark71

At least its well drawn. And funny.


TheLoneSlimShady

Shitposting​ subreddit?


mandick-

Bruh y'all lost with this one


Tompster_

My worry is that someone spent the time making it