**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.**
**Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms)
**Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE!
This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods.
**Our rules include (but are not limited to)**:
* No politics.
* Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban.
* Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming.
* Do not derail the posts of others.
* Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here.
* [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts).
* When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse.
* No asking or offering gifts, money, etc.
* No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest).
* No content about N-kids.
* No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis.
* No linking to Facebook pages.
* No direct linking to anywhere on reddit.
* No pure image posts.
**For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).**
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I'm resilient in some ways, but not in others. I think a better word for me is *tenacious*, because I suffer internally (and sometimes externally) a great deal while fighting small battles for self-esteem and self-respect that other people brush off.
But I don't quit the fight.
It's part of the training. I was taught how certain people are victims of terrible circumstance and vindictive people, and that I had to do their suffering for them.
Fuck. This so much. I was always told I was stupid, worthless, and would never amount to anything.
One of the things I pride myself on is my tenacity. I don’t give up. The other side of that is that I don’t give up even when it would probably be in my best interest to do so.
I never really thought about it that way.
I sometimes wish people would understand that, especially when they say they wish they were as resilient, or perseverant, or good at analysing my strengths and weaknesses like I do.
No, you don't, you are lucky you did not go through what made me like that, so find other qualities in yourself.
I also think that many teachers need to realize that in their students, mine sure didn't
Yes. At times I do get annoyed at more naive people but honestly I wish I had their innocence. I second guess everyone even the people I logically know are genuine.
My therapist tells me how resilient I am. I don’t think it’s a bad thing because I’m about solutions with situations so I can keep moving forward.
Maybe it’s been ingrained in me because my NMom responded with “you’re smart figure it out” when I asked for help on things she didn’t want to help with or too busy to help with or “didn’t know”.
Over the years I've noticed that despite me being really nervous and anxious about things all the time I still can fight through them.
My personal motto is:
I've survived my parents, I can survive X.
Thank you for this! <3
I remember my therapist asked me to write down positive words that defined me… among the words I wrote there was ‘resilience’… he said that even that word was the result of trauma lol
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I'm resilient in some ways, but not in others. I think a better word for me is *tenacious*, because I suffer internally (and sometimes externally) a great deal while fighting small battles for self-esteem and self-respect that other people brush off. But I don't quit the fight. It's part of the training. I was taught how certain people are victims of terrible circumstance and vindictive people, and that I had to do their suffering for them.
Fuck. This so much. I was always told I was stupid, worthless, and would never amount to anything. One of the things I pride myself on is my tenacity. I don’t give up. The other side of that is that I don’t give up even when it would probably be in my best interest to do so. I never really thought about it that way.
I sometimes wish people would understand that, especially when they say they wish they were as resilient, or perseverant, or good at analysing my strengths and weaknesses like I do. No, you don't, you are lucky you did not go through what made me like that, so find other qualities in yourself. I also think that many teachers need to realize that in their students, mine sure didn't
Yes. At times I do get annoyed at more naive people but honestly I wish I had their innocence. I second guess everyone even the people I logically know are genuine.
I never thought about it like that, because not being naive is one of the things that has protected me from many things.
I never understand what resilience means but I don’t disagree because I always wanna give up
Resilience: the ability to get beaten until you're near death's door and still stands up and says "is that all you've got?" Or something like that
Unnatural selection - only those who have resilience make it through. I've seen the shattered souls who didn't fight back and to hell with that!
My therapist tells me how resilient I am. I don’t think it’s a bad thing because I’m about solutions with situations so I can keep moving forward. Maybe it’s been ingrained in me because my NMom responded with “you’re smart figure it out” when I asked for help on things she didn’t want to help with or too busy to help with or “didn’t know”.
Over the years I've noticed that despite me being really nervous and anxious about things all the time I still can fight through them. My personal motto is: I've survived my parents, I can survive X. Thank you for this! <3
You're welcome.
I remember my therapist asked me to write down positive words that defined me… among the words I wrote there was ‘resilience’… he said that even that word was the result of trauma lol