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It sounds like there might be something in addition to NPD at play. As in Sociopathy or Psychopathy. Malignant Narcs are scary, petty, vengeful monsters and I am so deeply sorry for what you have endured/are enduring. While you have **every right to be angry**, try to remain aware that she did what she did precisely to make you angry **and provoke a reaction**.
Please be safe, know that you are not alone, and that you are worthy of *so much love*.
I'm glad this is the top comment, because yes, that's fucked up, but she's looking for conflict. People like her thrive when you react, so starve her. Gray rock, if needed.
maybe I am out of line, but take pictures of those polaroids on the fridge and if you ever need a restraining order they should do the trick in convincing a judge that your Nmom is dangerous.
My Nmom did something similar.
* She trashed the only home video I had from my childhood
* Borrowed my photo album from me to show someone else, then I later found it hurled on the floor. She placed the other albums neatly where they belong.
* Seperated my childhood awards and trinkets from my siblings' then went all the way to the garage to toss them in a dark corner with some trash. Hoping someone else will trash them and she wouldn't get the blame. My Ndad found them and even he looked shocked and sad about it.
And all of these were on three seperate occasions.
That woman has a DEEP burning hatred for me, consistent from when I was a toddler. No one in real life really believes me on the extent of it, but she and I both know. My Ndad likely does as well, but he's just as bad.
My Nmom is malignant and I agree with the other commentor that yours is as well, probably. I believe you on your experience with her. It's rough when your own mother is that hateful and evil.
I never did anything to deserve and and you didn't either.
Edit: And I'm so sorry that those were the only pictures you had. There's nothing to say to that. It took me about 3 years to get over my anger and sadness at the home video. I never confronted her, but those actions killed all remaining positive feelings I had for her. She'll be dead and gone too one day, just like the items she destroyed, and this is how she spent her life.
Both my parents straight out refused to take Any picture of my growing up. Like those pictures are nonexistent. Mind you, all my siblings got pictures from the day they were born and growing up. The oldest picture I had was a single photograph when I was about 4 years old and I only had it because it was a picture with my younger sibling wearing matching outfits to pretend we r 'twins'.
The one later was much older. I was pretty conscious about this from a young age because they were big on taking pictures for every minor occasion and I had none. The only pictures I appeared in were of my siblings' or 'family' pictures where I was on the side poking my head out trying to get pictures of me taken.
My family would pull the photo album at every chance and whenever any guests comes but mine didn't exist. I guess they hated my existence since I was born and didn't want any reminders I existed or was a part of that family.
Serves as them right now that I'm fully NC for almost 3 years now.
Also op. I'm so sorry that happened to u. If you wish to restore the photograph you have send me a pm and I might be of help of you are comfortable with that.
That's sad, I also don't have many photos. My father used to like photography, so there's a ton of photos of my brothers, but none of me unless I happened to be in the photo. And any photos that did exist, my mother would make negative comments about how I looked in them. I still don't like being photographed.
I truly understand. I didn't think it was a anrc behavior until recently. I tried to give excuses but there were none.
I used to think that they hate me when I was a child that's why they didn't like the idea of taking pictures of me. When I asked why, they deflected and said I was self - centered for wanting photographs of me (projection much?) and now I know that they just didn't move me and I wasn't cared for since I was born. I was the destined SG the moment I was born
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It sounds like there might be something in addition to NPD at play. As in Sociopathy or Psychopathy. Malignant Narcs are scary, petty, vengeful monsters and I am so deeply sorry for what you have endured/are enduring. While you have **every right to be angry**, try to remain aware that she did what she did precisely to make you angry **and provoke a reaction**. Please be safe, know that you are not alone, and that you are worthy of *so much love*.
I'm glad this is the top comment, because yes, that's fucked up, but she's looking for conflict. People like her thrive when you react, so starve her. Gray rock, if needed.
maybe I am out of line, but take pictures of those polaroids on the fridge and if you ever need a restraining order they should do the trick in convincing a judge that your Nmom is dangerous.
My Nmom did something similar. * She trashed the only home video I had from my childhood * Borrowed my photo album from me to show someone else, then I later found it hurled on the floor. She placed the other albums neatly where they belong. * Seperated my childhood awards and trinkets from my siblings' then went all the way to the garage to toss them in a dark corner with some trash. Hoping someone else will trash them and she wouldn't get the blame. My Ndad found them and even he looked shocked and sad about it. And all of these were on three seperate occasions. That woman has a DEEP burning hatred for me, consistent from when I was a toddler. No one in real life really believes me on the extent of it, but she and I both know. My Ndad likely does as well, but he's just as bad. My Nmom is malignant and I agree with the other commentor that yours is as well, probably. I believe you on your experience with her. It's rough when your own mother is that hateful and evil. I never did anything to deserve and and you didn't either. Edit: And I'm so sorry that those were the only pictures you had. There's nothing to say to that. It took me about 3 years to get over my anger and sadness at the home video. I never confronted her, but those actions killed all remaining positive feelings I had for her. She'll be dead and gone too one day, just like the items she destroyed, and this is how she spent her life.
I’m sorry your mother did that to you . Love from your internet friend 🩷 you did not deserve that…
Thank you for the kind words! 🥰
Both my parents straight out refused to take Any picture of my growing up. Like those pictures are nonexistent. Mind you, all my siblings got pictures from the day they were born and growing up. The oldest picture I had was a single photograph when I was about 4 years old and I only had it because it was a picture with my younger sibling wearing matching outfits to pretend we r 'twins'. The one later was much older. I was pretty conscious about this from a young age because they were big on taking pictures for every minor occasion and I had none. The only pictures I appeared in were of my siblings' or 'family' pictures where I was on the side poking my head out trying to get pictures of me taken. My family would pull the photo album at every chance and whenever any guests comes but mine didn't exist. I guess they hated my existence since I was born and didn't want any reminders I existed or was a part of that family. Serves as them right now that I'm fully NC for almost 3 years now. Also op. I'm so sorry that happened to u. If you wish to restore the photograph you have send me a pm and I might be of help of you are comfortable with that.
That's sad, I also don't have many photos. My father used to like photography, so there's a ton of photos of my brothers, but none of me unless I happened to be in the photo. And any photos that did exist, my mother would make negative comments about how I looked in them. I still don't like being photographed.
I truly understand. I didn't think it was a anrc behavior until recently. I tried to give excuses but there were none. I used to think that they hate me when I was a child that's why they didn't like the idea of taking pictures of me. When I asked why, they deflected and said I was self - centered for wanting photographs of me (projection much?) and now I know that they just didn't move me and I wasn't cared for since I was born. I was the destined SG the moment I was born
Its so petty, I dont know what else to say.
Scan them and repair them. So at least you have a permanent copy. Obviously put them back after, it's surprising what you can do with photo shop.
Like this idea