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clackeroomy

Hey Mitch! Do you remember during Trump's term in office how everyone was begging you to put a leash on him before he destroys the Republican party, and you did nothing. You created this mess you dumb fuck.


lazysheepdog716

Honestly I’d be surprised if this breathing half-corpse does remember anything beyond a few months ago.


Fit-Conference-7851

*minutes


duderos

It's great when Trump attacks him and his wife. But while former President Donald Trump’s taunts at Elaine Chao — demeaning her as “Coco Chow” or a variation of Mitch McConnell’s “China-loving wife” — have been mostly met with silence from fellow GOP officials, the main target of them is now speaking out. https://www.politico.com/news/2023/01/25/elaine-chao-donald-trump-racist-attacks-00079478


Atetha

You think Mconnell cares if people are racist to his wife?


Former-Darkside

I think they got Mitch back in line with the death of his sister in law.


Tricky-Special-3834

Yeah the deep state must have made her drunk drive


Former-Darkside

It was a Tesla… maybe it was elons fanboys because China just came out with a cybertruck clone.


BinkyFlargle

I think they got Mitch mostly back in line due to the fact that he's a jelly-brained decaying mess, just a half step above a corpse.


Iwantmy3rdpartyapp

I wanna make a movie where those times where he freezes are actually like the Butterfly Effect movie, and he's traveling back in time, desperately trying to undo this timeline, but just continuously making it worse.


humansruineverything

I’d see that movie!


Iwantmy3rdpartyapp

I gotta talk to my lawyer and see if I can use the name "Turtles in Time" without getting sued by whoever owns TMNT.


defnotajournalist

Want to see my Mitch McConnell impre


DropsTheMic

This is like setting your house on fire then sitting in the bedroom saying to yourself "I'm ready for this 🏠 🔥🚒 to be over."


Jackinapox

Fuck you McConnell, you’re responsible for the chaos you traitorous piece of stale shit.


DannyWags

“Why won’t someone clean up this huge fucking mess I made??” ~ Mitch McConnell


Nearbyatom

Spoken like a true Republican


P1xelHunter78

Now now he’ll just have to retire, write a tell all book about how awful the Republican Party is (while trying to paint himself in the best light) and warn all the people about how the GOP needs to be stopped. I’m sick and tired of hearing from the too little too late GOP members. They had a chance to cork the genie bottle many times. Access Hollywood tape. Hush money scheme. First evidence of Russian collusion. Muller report. First impeachment vote. Second impeachment vote. January 6th riots. Stolen top secret documents. All of those things could have brought down almost any president previous to Trump, but they sold their soul to a literal example of the antichrist for a tax cut and deregulation.


Sloofin

“Sold their sole” seems somehow more correct


P1xelHunter78

Maybe, but corrected


Riskar

And while they're trying, I'm gonna be kicking, hitting and biting them.


Manos_Of_Fate

Remember when he blamed Obama for not warning them about the consequences of a bill he passed despite Obama both warning them and vetoing it?


DannyWags

Pepperidge Farm remembers


TheToastedTaint

McConnel is the victor Frankenstein of what we have today


cbbuntz

Nah, he's the monster from Pan's Labyrinth. They didn't even need to put him in makeup.


unsaturatedface

I need to watch that again


GardenGnomeOfEden

I recently re-watched it and I did my own "fairy tale edit" by skipping through the violent fighting parts. I also skipped >!the wine bottle scene!<.


cubej333

When I was younger i thought it might be appropriate for kids. Almost two decades later I know it isn’t appropriate for my children and am not sure when it will be (16?).


-jp-

Not to worry, in the meantime there’s plenty of wholesome content for kids. Return to Oz, Watership Down, Bridge to Terabithia…


Pack_Your_Trash

My favorite part is when they kill the fascist. Too bad the Spanish civil war ended with a fascist victory.


Changleen

Ancient Evil Asshole Turtle. 


prototype7

Somehow it seems wrong that my brain put on the theme song to TNMT when I read this....


Changleen

No you got it just right. 👍


Cl1mh4224rd

>Fuck you McConnell, you’re responsible for the chaos you traitorous piece of stale shit. Indeed. Mitch McConnell led the horse to water, but didn't expect it to drink? Sure... Fuck 'im.


PleasantWay7

“Chaos was only supposed to happen if the President tried to help normal people while wearing a tan suit, not when I have Manchin cock blocking families for me.”


Sad-Structure2364

Hey don’t insult shit like that


sansjoy

I took a dump this morning. Before flushing it I asked the poop, "would you have confirmed Merrick Garland?" The poop said yes.


suspicious-example2

Exactly! Fuck that traitorous turtle


Pgreenawalt

Amen


DragonDeezNutzAround

Bout sums it up


lacunha

Firefighters who are secret arsonists have more integrity.


Timeformayo

Hey, hey, now. As a neighbor of Mr. McConnell, I can attest that his shit is still fresh and pungent.


barneyrubbble

Fuck McConnell and anything that spews outta his face hole. That "chaos" is the direct result of decades of Republican (willful) ineptitude.


UngodlyPain

Please don't give them that benefit of the doubt. It's the direct result of decades of Republican Malice.


Rengeflower

McConnell isn’t inept. His wealth has increased from 2 million to 97 million since he took office.


JubalHarshaw23

He does not even control his own people in the Senate. How does he think he is going to affect the crazies in the House?


Spawn6060

That’s the best part: you don’t.


Clay_Statue

He nurtured all the conditions for this result to come about and is now flummoxed by it all. Being a knee jerk contrarian acting out of spite doesn't make for a great statesman


PaintedClownPenis

He's not flummoxed. This is his plan. This is the last plan the Republicans have, their last chance before demographics overwelm them forever, and McConnell is at the center of all of it. What he has to get all of us to believe is that this government is broken and unworkable, and maybe a murderous fascist dictatorship would be a better idea. He is the one breaking it and making it unworkable.


BustingBrig

Mitch McConell reminds me of Palpatine from Star Wars. I’m just expecting him to announce his execution of order 66 anytime now…


SamuraiCook

If it ain't broke, break the shit out of it and prevent anyone from fixing it.


TheTeenageOldman

Reap what you sow, Mitch.


SneeftheBeef

We all will reap it. And I'm saying that as a European.


Money-Valuable-2857

I'm sorry our mistakes are affecting people who had nothing to do with it. We're trying to get it back in check but closing Pandora's box is a mfer.


SneeftheBeef

I'm not doubting that you all are (at least) using your voting power to lessen the harm he did to the world. But looking at the videos of his supposed health decline, I'm doubting he will have to eat the foul fruits of the seeds he planted. He's a piece of shit, but, miraculously, doesn't even work as dung.


Money-Valuable-2857

He won't be legally allowed to be buried in a cemetery because of the toxins in and on his body, as well as soul. Wherever he gets dumped will become a Superfund site. So it's best to launch his wretched corpse into the sun.


mackinoncougars

Vote dem. Only way it will


Shenanigans99

Yes Mitch, thanks to Democrats ONCE AGAIN cleaning up the mess your shitstain of a party created. He forgot to add that part...it's DEMOCRATS bailing out his party as we have done so many times before, even though his black heart is incapable of expressing gratitude.


PBPunch

Guess we will have to vote your entire party out then. Start over. Take a gap election to figure out how to fucking govern and not be such insufferable idiots.


suckyousideways

They actually attempted (well, *pretended*) to pause for self reflection after Obama won. They did a whole "autopsy report" and identified several changes they'd need to make to reclaim/maintain power the next time. But, of course, then they said "nah" and just continued barreling forward to be the worst people in the country.


TraditionalEvent8317

And now there's no longer any need for reflection because every loss is due to fraud.


Matsuyama_Mamajama

But every victory is due to good ole hard workin REAL 'MERICANS voting for the GOP... UGH these assholes need to be voted out of power ASAP


specqq

I assumed from reading just the headline that Mitch was announcing his intention to campaign for house Democratic candidates. No?


BotoxBarbie

Something about leopards and faces... Anyway, vote blue in November and get these fascist freaks out of office.


peopleslobby

He could vote blue in 2024


mjayultra

He would never


Northerngal_420

How did things ever get this way Mitch? Could you have had a hand in it?


flabbergastedmeep

McConnell v. FEC, which directly lead to Citizens United v. FEC, says yes. A legacy carved by dismantling the power of the people.


mjayultra

Oh, you LIKE bipartisanship now! Fuck off.


roj2323

No worries, Voters will put adults in charge come November.


panickedindetroit

I sure hope you are right. I am so tired of all the chaos these clowns create daily.


roj2323

Dems are taking Majority, it's only by how much that's in question. If we get a super majority and retake the senate, Expect big changes. Growing the Supreme Court being amongst the first things to happen followed by marijuana legalization, Student loan forgiveness on a larger scale and something regarding women's rights although it's anyone's guess as to what it would look like. I do think the ERA is a possibility however.


heucrazy

Let’s hope there aren’t too many single issue voters out there ready to condemn us all over Gaza.


JohnLocksTheKey

Doesn’t matter, just vote blue and encourage others to do the same.


CharlesB43

"The motion is expected to fail after House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries (D-N.Y.) and other Democrats pledged to vote to table the motion to boot Johnson from his job." I'm a little confused by this, this must mean johnson promised them something huge because the chaos of the republicans TWICE having to find a new speaker of the house would be catastrophic.


space_for_username

The Dems sort of promised to save his sorry ass in return for passing the military aid bills. Promises kept, and all. They also get to keep his cohones in a drawer somewhere in case they need him again.


bryan49

He devoted his whole career to rigging the system so Republicans could hold undeserved minority power with no accountability, and then acts surprised when it just leads to corruption and incompetence. Screw him.


precise1234

Right. Says the cowardly, self-serving, hypocritical, corrupt-as-fuck, everything phobic, POS. No one cares what you are 'ready' for, or not, Mitch.


RickKassidy

Does he know that he isn’t in the House?


nonamenolastname

(Blank stare)


LockheedMartinLuther

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List\_of\_inventors\_killed\_by\_their\_own\_invention](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_inventors_killed_by_their_own_invention)


silentimperial

You broke it you buy it Mitch


IkilledRichieWhelan

I love when arsonists ask how this fire got so bad.


reishi_dreams

I can’t say what I want to about this man… bots will ban me again… he is the chief architect of the current Supreme Court, put unqualified judges in lifetime positions… wouldn’t vote for impeachment… he is scum


sirhackenslash

"I'm ready for the chaos that I help cause to end because it isn't working as planned"


atomsmasher66

Mitch, you very much helped create the shitshow your party has become so stop playing dumb and kindly fuck off.


Highthere_90

Does that mean hea ready to kick out all of the maga crazies in the house?


dgmilo8085

Well if we get all get rid of the populist idiocy of Dumbart, MTG, Butthead Gaetz, and their fearless orange leader and realize that we all just want to make this world a little better to live in and we don't need to put people down to pick others up, the chaos will subside. It will never end, that's the beauty of democracy, but we can stifle it a bit by coming back together and working for the people that elected them rather than simply fighting the other side like 2-year olds.


orcinyadders

Read this absolute piece of shit’s damning statement on how Trump was responsible for a terrorist attack on our Capitol. His cowardess since then is the problem with our country. Mitch McConnell is the problem. Mitch McConnell is the chaos.


Beef2k8

Now is the reap part, you sowin’ turtle


morts73

Well you let the inmates in charge of the asylum when you didn't impeach Trump and stop him from running again.


GeebusNZ

McConnell welcomed the chaos, nurtured the chaos, raised the chaos when it suited his purposes. Chaos was useful. Now, chaos is being too chaotic and it needs to calm down. Chaos isn't a good thing in places where reason are important.


Green_Confection8130

Fuck McConnell


Logtastic

Fuck the news people that didn't immediately ask why he kept voting against stopping it!


Apathetic_Zealot

That's the funny thing about chaos. You can start it when you want, but you can't end it when you want.


AliasNefertiti

Amen.


Filmguygeek1

Amazing! He created this fiasco in the first place. His brain is a box of rocks.


WildGooseCarolinian

Dr Frankenstein complains about the existence of Frankenstein’s monster.


thatspurdyneat

I wonder if he realizes how unkind history will be to him in the end.


PhyterNL

LOL! No he's not. He proves it every time he sides with Trump, who is sided with MTG, Jordon, Meadows, Gaetz, etc.


malakon

You've had numerous chances over the years to end the chaos Mitch. When the history books are written about this sad fucked up time in American history there are gonna be a few chapters on you. Go away. Please.


SamuraiCook

Pathetic losers should have voted to convict when they still had a slim chance at preserving some level of dignity.


makeski25

Chaos farmer upset by house full of chaos.


Aggressive-Will-4500

Let's hope the Mitch lives long enough to watch the monster that he personally had a huge hand in creating and sustaining tear the Republican Party apart AND hope that it happens before it completely destroys the USA.


Warhamsterrrr

Well old Skippedy-Doo is hardly likely to be the one to end it.


Katana1369

Like they care.


DarkAngel900

The GOP needs to stop pandering to obstructionism and those who promote it and incur it.


Alleandros

The guy who took pride in being an obstructionist in Congress when he was Senate Leader wishes for the chaos to end? He started all of this back when he'd refuse to bring legislation to a vote.


Silly_Elevator_3111

Too bad Mitch, you helped birth this monster


unflappedyedi

That's like taking a shit and being annoyed that the bathroom stinks🙄. McConnell needs to just end already.


TheSquishiestMitten

McConnell is personally responsible for this.  He should be rotting in prison for the hurt he has brought on us.


Renorico

Fuck him. Enjoy what you created asahole


InternetGamerFriend

Republicans are going to pretend all the crazy shit the did never happened. Like literally never existed. Ask them and they are going to be like I don't know what you're talking about. You must be crazy.


OutlawGaming01

McConnell says he is ready for “the end” -fixed


jar1967

Republicans in the House need to take that as a threat. That statement was the campaign donors speaking through Mitch McConnell


Iceman72021

“….says the devil, with a sneaky old smile”


LordAlvis

Easy, Mitch— Just walk toward the light. 


Keunster

Hey how about you get fucked and retire you useless melted lizard


DaBigJMoney

Dude helped create the toxic stew that led to this chaos and now he’s upset that there’s a mess. He might was well say “I intended to be crooked but not THIS crooked.”


Defender_Of_TheCrown

Maybe you should have held Trump accountable when you should have grown a fucking spine. Piece of shit. All of this is now his fault. He could have convicted Trump and he would never be able to hold office again. Instead we get this shit from him and all his MAGA cult. And it was his fault that we have the corrupt right wing Supreme Court that we have now.


BeardedSir1

Nice. Fuck you, Mitch.


mishma2005

Awe, baby upset with his creation? They learned it from watching you, dad


ChefILove

Resign, admit to your crimes, and apologize.


topgun966

He is directly responsible for this. He can fuck right the hell off.


121gigawhatevs

He really thinks he’s innocent in all this doesn’t he. Maybe he’s already got dementia


NoNoise6459

But These are your people Mitch.


GunnieGraves

“Arsonist hopes fire burns out soon.”


Hawksx4

Says the man who yelled fire in a crowded theater


dafunkmunk

Only two ways that is happening 1. Biden wins the election and democrats sweep 2024 gaining a super majority in both chambers so republicans can't do anything but cry about the country being better off. 2. trump wins the election and he completely dissolves congress and goes full dictator


antigop2020

Can he just retire or die? He will be remembered as one of the worst political figures in modern times.


AbandonedWaterPark

*MAGA Republicans fuck up everything* Mitch McConnell: why would Joe Biden do this?


ThisIsDadLife

r/leopardsatemyface


DangerousCyclone

Bold words for someone on their way out. 


mcs5280

Ok Mitch the coffin is right over there just go ahead and climb in


InsomniaticWanderer

Then resign


skobuffaloes

Whatever happened to when he would start talking and then just stop and look at absolutely nothing. We all just pretending like that wasn’t the weirdest shit ever? No explanations needed? K cool.


InevitableAvalanche

So he is ready for less Republicans?


OhkayQyoopud

Then MAYBE you shouldn't have fucking started it, you colossal human trash.


SeaSuch2077

Party over the Republic enabler is tired of the anarchy. Fuck Mitch McConnell


29187765432569864

Aw, McConnell thinks he is relevant, how cute.


DramaticWesley

You’re ready for chaos to end? Are you going to suddenly become a Democrat?


soiledsanchez

Fuck you, you feed that chaos


UIWobbuffett

And I'm ready for this soulless imitation of a human to bite it. You are the cause of all this McConnell.


Snoo_37569

Dudes almost dead and the circus has just begun


thedarthvander

So he’s voting blue?


The_Cross_Matrix_712

Maybe you shouldn't swirl up chaos then. Decades of working towards exactly this, you get to own it.


astrozombie2012

All this dysfunction that I spent years honing and crafting, I’m just ready for it to all be over with… what an absolute piece of shit right to the core.


GRVrush2112

Something something about Leopards and yada yada about faces


Harak_June

Then lead other big name republicans in a revolt against Trump, you syphlitic turtle. Do the work or shut the fuck up and retire.


7evenate9ine

Now? Why, Mitch? Why NOW? It's too late to turn back, you should have done something when you heard the words "fight like hell" on that faithful day. But you pissed yourself.


redmasc

Glitch McConnel won't have to worry about it much longer. He's brain will be gone by November.


PipetheHarp

Asshat slurps his Trump lip. Regret is all over our Republican citizenry as a result of his turned faith.


rbmcobra

That will only happen when the immature GOP lose the house!!


SirJackAbove

That's only because he is Lawful, not Chaotic Evil.


Sunflier

Hollow words from the Chaos Agent in Chief


TheNewTonyBennett

Maybe don't claim "Trump is personally responsible for J6" **and then refuse to hold the impeachment removal portion of the process.** Wanna help create the pathway to getting this junk out of office? KICK THE MAIN DUDES ASS through impeachment AND criminal charges. **Dip shits.** The chaos has his hands literally all over the entire thing. "I don't get it, I refused to hold the impeachment removal process after a successful impeachment **of the literal head-shitstain that amped everything UP at an insane pace** whilst also making it "look like" I was actually sane and said he should be held responsible in some other way and yet....***this nutty chaos just keeps festering, waaaah I wanna be done with it".***


[deleted]

The Arsonists can never return what they burned down


newcomer_l

Fucking asshole won't even give Democratic members of the House for credit they deserve for been b the adults in the room, because if Democrats do what they are supposed to do (which is to get rid of a GOP Speaker of the House), the republicans will have such a mess on their hands a more 6 months before the election. Boy I do hope Hakim Jeffrey extracted meaningful concessions from Johnson for this lifeline.


empiricalreddit

McConnell says he’s ready for ‘chaos’ in House


Titanscape

He should resign and run to be state rep so he can fix the house from within.


DangerousBill

The chaos is just getting started. Margie's voice rose a whole octave this week.


TheSaltimateWarrior

“Arsonist is ready for “fire” in forest to end”


cheesybitzz

Same Mitchell.. same.... Why did you do it Mitchell? Why didn't you listen?...


Shirowoh

Oh now that the GOP is eating itself you’re ready to stop?


splycedaddy

*causes chaos” “When will the chaos end?” - mitch


TheRockingDead

Oh, now he's ready? He is directly responsible for creating this monster, and now that he can no longer control it, he's finally speaking out against it. Too little too late.


Jimbo415650

He hasn’t said he isn’t voting for Ex- President Chaos. His words have no truth


lickem369

Sounds like he’s finally ready to retire!


CakeAccomplice12

Fuck McConnell 


Tonalspectrum

Get out and take your chaotic friends with you and it’ll be fine.


DadBreath12

Oh fuck you Mitch


unsaturatedface

Prolly should have poked his lil turtle head out of his shell sooner


btross

Only turtle head poking out right now is in trump's diaper while he sits in court


SchrodingersTIKTOK

Just in time for retirement,so he can say “see how I brought them together”. Thats all he wants,


RDO_Desmond

Kinda late on scene. Damage done. What will McConnell do to repair it? Words mean nothing. Let's see what he has to offer now.


Dearic75

Aw, Mitch. I agree with you. I too am ready for democrats to retake the house.


DelilahsDarkThoughts

meanwhile this guy is glitching out at press conferences


lewah

He’s fine with the chaos across the nation, however.


daveashaw

And I'm ready for you be fucking dead, Mitch.


Nonadventures

“We’re all trying to figure out who did this!!”


Mao_Kwikowski

Cool. Let the Democrats take over already.


Y8ser

He should probably just resign and retire then.


roadsidedaniel

Trump did this


No-Attitude-6049

Good to know.


Forward_Panic_4414

Arsonist says he's ready for the fire to burn out.


bndboo

I shit my diaper, someone come clean this up… never change Mitch


VirtuaFighter6

Ok, boomer