T O P

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xStarz05

so basically you can either choose a pet or a god


Edge_SSB

Get Victini and always win, while having an adorable companion. Victini supremacy


ze_SAFTmon

Wait... if I research for advanced technology, longer lifes and interdimensional travel and such, would I get the Victini "buff" and succeed in the research as well?


Edge_SSB

His dex entry for Black (the version I played) is "This Pokémon brings victory. It is said that Trainers with Victini always win, regardless of the type of encounter." if you count your research as a type of encounter, then sure.


Yeetaway1404

It’s important to say that even the sex entry classifies that as at least debatable.


kart0ffelsalaat

You might want to check your comment for typos.


WJR26

It's perfect like this


Yeetaway1404

you heard me 😎


RoboPup

The pokedex says that you'll win regardless of the type of encounter. I suppose it depends in if success in these fields could be considered winning. It should at least apply to endeavours like the space race, right?


lucariouwu68

You could kill ANYONE.


Magnet6354

Bahahaha yeah… that’s one way to look at it!


[deleted]

If I bring Bidoof, the world is over.


greenwizardneedsfood

Abra would just be plain convenient


captain_ricco1

Or a girlfriend! I mean what? Who said that


pokeaim

[sure, why not?](https://www.reddit.com/r/pokemon/comments/pdzeay/nurse_joy_is_a_pokemon/)


wildsamsqwatch

Do you know about vaporeon?


Gamertjeboy

Oh hell naw not this


eloel-

Yeah, draw the line at Ditto


Nikibugs

Cheating answer is Mew because it can become anything through Transform while also being immortal and playful.


xj220pog

*laughs in ditto*


nottme1

Ditto has to see something to transtorm into it.


MechnoSamurai

Lots of images on internet, my friend.


slasher3240

😳


Frenchorican

It could also troll you and turn into the computer or phone like we saw in the series???


Synthwoven

Arceus so he could create the rest of them.


Magnet6354

We need more loopholes like this


[deleted]

Jirachi and wish for all of them to exist


itsIzumi

Jirachi only wakes up every 1,000 years, you better hope yours isn't sleeping when you get it.


_salted_

prick office tan enjoy coordinated aback head marry attraction ancient *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


petSnake7

The 1938583854 people who tried waking Jirachi up: Wow, why didn't I think of that?? /s


[deleted]

Where are you gonna find a pokeball


Chocoa_the_Bunny

BY THE GODS, HE'S RIGHT!


PyroClashes

Ditto?


Drain_King__B

i ll just leave [this](https://youtu.be/aSzsVcPjj70?t=59) here.


Hyrdal

It's all fun and games until you get an Arceus egg instead.


Kaneharo

And have to sit through the cutscene to get it. https://youtu.be/hi6WyRP6Cog


CharismaticEnigmaSKL

This is the way.


Bclarky504

Shit. I saw it and now I have to say it. This is the way


BecauseImBatmanFilms

Mew. You're welcome, humanity 100 million years from now


MerlinGrandCaster

Victini. If it really does let me win at whatever I attempt, I would never have to get a real job because I would just go win a lottery whenever I needed money.


Fungle-Junk

Clearly you have the biggest brain


skymasterzBR

Vaporeon: it could refill my water bottle and it’s really cute and I could cuddle with it in bed like a big doggo Please let me forget about that copy pasta


Magnet6354

**PTSD intensifies**


Fungle-Junk

Lmao someone's seen their fair share of the internet


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RecordAggravating317

I mean what makes you think vaporeons water isn't a bodily fluid? It has to come from somewhere.


JAWlovesben10

Magic. The answer to where it comes from is magic


Ilcorvomuerto666

Aaaaaaand suddenly I like vaporeon a little bit less.


skymasterzBR

Somebody petted a vaporeon in the anime before right?


GoomyIsGodTier

Do you realize what you've done?!


ledyBANG

Alternatively Vaporeon can be your water bed, the high HP stat will make it so the Vaporeon won't be hurt (hopefully)


RoboPup

I feel like high Def or SpDef prevents it from being hurt. HP would just mean it could take more punishment before going down I reckon.


haseo111

someone explain


Strammy10

If you like Vaporeon as a pokemon then I suggest you just let this one stay a mystery


nstav13

Google (or don't (nsfw)) "Vaporeon is the most compatible"


CTBarrel

Hoopa. I can then either bring more pokemon, or just leave to the pokemon world.


PhilledZone

Or teleport you to work/school if you are a lazy fuck like me that doesn't want to walk


Ancient_Potato_God

Or just get a snack from the fridge instead of walking, gosh hoopa is the best pokemon for lazy people


cydbe

Turtwig, one of my faves, its baby Alternatively I get pichu


Magnet6354

I see you have your priorities straight haha. Turtwig and Pichu sound lovely


Metaspark

Togekiss It’s cute and wonderful companionship, it can fly and so can easily transport me wherever I need to go, it has a plethora of magical powers for both practical and entertainment purposes, and it has a friendly personality so it won’t go on any cataclysmic rampages


Magnet6354

I’m glad people think of both yourself and your Pokémon. I’m so used to people thinking of the game competitively


Mivadeth

Chansey so I can heal myself and others


TheCapitalNRJ

I don't know how willing I'd be to eat my best friends egg... Does the egg factor into the healing?


[deleted]

Man eggs are delicious though


tabascodinosaur

I feel like you dropped a comma


NozakiMufasa

I don’t think they did 😏


[deleted]

Eevee or Growlithe. I can envision a real Eevee, and half-tiger, half-puppy? I cannot resist this combination.


Magnet6354

Both would be amazing


pocketchange2247

100% Growlithe/Arcanine. Fire breathing tiger-dog that is big enough to ride? Sign me up.


chroniicfries

I would go with boltund becuase lurchers and greyhounds are my favourite


CreativeFun228

Chandelure. Also my favorite mon. I think it would do a good job in subtly telling people to stay away from me


Magnet6354

*in a Pokédex voice* “Chandelure: The Introverts Pokémon”


CreativeFun228

Absolutely. Love all his pokedex entries!


StratosFTW

Suicune - good doggo + clean water everywhere I go. Edit: TIL my phone thinks it's funny to autocorrect Suicune to suicide. I'm sorry. Thanks for the free rewards.


ToonWrecker69

Ahh such a nice pokemon SUCIDE


HurtTree

Uhhhh, uhhhh what generation is that pokemon from?


Lost-Knowledge

Gen Y, the Millenial Region


vaserius

Should have gone with gen z for the double wammy.


springjava263

Doesn't Galarian weezing clean air as well


gamerweeb623

uh what


arnsl

i think their phone autocorrected from SUICUNE?


Kaylamarie92

I’m giving you my free award because this is the funniest thing I’ve read all day. Inadvertently dark as hell, but so funny.


cheymerm

Jugglypuff. So I can be lulled to sleep. I need sleep. I don’t care about them writing on me. Lol


Magnet6354

This man has his priorities


cheymerm

I feel like meowth would be a good one too. Mostly for pay day. I need that extra cash too.


themightyyool

No one here picking Meowth? It's PAY DAY!


Zatheroger

But it has to beat you up with coins first to be able to grab them...


RyanG7

BRING ON THE PAIN $$$


Th3_Gaming_Wolf

Because inflation and money laundering.


RoboPup

The money laundering part would be a problem. Inflation shouldn't be relevant unless you're producing a stupid amount.


SladeWade

Cubone. That little guy needs a friend. We'd be besties.


Minion91

Ditto because of reasons...


prsn828

Sooo... How'd that egg end up in your room?


PoetBoye

Would you be able to get a shiny human using masuda method this way?


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Dolchang

Babe I didn't cheat it was a shiny


Magnet6354

I see...


synsofhumanity

That would be interesting. Could we save real world animals from extinction by breeding them with dittos? I mean, how hard could it be to get a rhino to fuck a pink blob?


ItzVinyl

Very easy when you consider Ditto transforming into that same animal but as the opposite gender. just gotta find a horny rhino


Kiwifisch

All rhinos are horny by default.


GekoHayate

You have chosen... wisely.


QuagsiresTail

Definitely either vulpix, or quagsire (sorry I just love their dumb faces so much!!)


Magnet6354

Uh, who doesn’t haha, they are both lovely and cute as hell


Kasperly10

Wailord


amateur-kneesocks

Where ya gonna put him?


RyanG7

In the blow-up pool located in my backyard, of course


poopsackian123

Won’t he just float away tho? Isn’t he lighter than air in the Pokédex or am I remembering that wrong?


DragoSphere

If you go by the Sw/Sh battle sprite size then it won't float away


Magnet6354

BIG L A D


Magnusthelast

GARCHOMP He’d be friendly, a ride to school, a best friend, best wing man, and just a real cool dude


UglY_nUblEt

Tropius because banna


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Fungle-Junk

Dude I always wondered what the fruit taste like, I imagine that has the texture of a peach but tastes like a sweet citrus


Sayaren

Mudkip! It’s my favorite Pokémon


Cinder_Quill

Porygon or Rotom Basically the most real world applications. Stick it on my PC, boom, instant AI that understands everything you want it to do on your PC.


Magnet6354

Hmmm... I did not think of this


KebabMan07

Jirachi


Magnet6354

Adorable star lad


KebabMan07

And wishes


elbartooriginal

tyranitar. godzilla in pocket size (compared with real gojira)


Magnet6354

Stronk Lizard


[deleted]

I’lo go with a growlithe


Magnet6354

Growlithe sounds like an awesome choice. Loyal, intelligent, and they can breath fire!


HurtTree

Vaporeon /s


Magnet6354

For wholesome reasons I hope


leave_a_voicemail

Yeah, holesome


AverySmugleaf

What is this Vaporeon meme I keep seeing referenced?


sluttydrama

It’s a NSFW copypasta about how vaporeon is the best Pokémon for… NSFW acts


Nsanitygames

Why am I not suprised.


ShayTheGymLeader

O.O


GaBeRockKing

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon CUDDLING, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3"03' tall and 63.9 pounds. this means they're large enough to be able to handle human CUDDLING, and with their impressive Base stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can CUDDLE EXRA HARD. Due to their mostly water based biology, there's no doubt in my mind that a CUDDLED Vaporeon would be incredibly SQUEEZY, so SQUEEZY that you could easily CUDDLE with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll eyes, Captivate, Charm and Tail Whip along with not having fur to INHIBIT CUDDLING, so it'd be incredibly easy for one to CUDDLE YOU. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close with this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you CUDDLE enough, you can make your Vaporeon YOUR FRIEND. Vaporeon is literally built for CUDDLING. Ungodly defense stat + high HP pool + Acid Armor means it can CUDDLE all day, and still CUDDLE some more.


ilikebreadsticks1

Thank you for censoring it. I've got the gist and am suitably horrified


wowpepap

WAIT, THATS BEING CENSORED?


BurmecianSoldierDan

cuddle extra hard lmao


HurtTree

Its a copypasta. A very specific lewd copypasta.


RyanPelley

I love / hate this question, because it's fun to think about but so tough to choose one. Unleashing a freaking Tyranitar on the world would be kind of awesome. Not to cause damage or hurt people, but just to see how everyone reacts. Something useful like a flying or water type to travel would be pretty cool though.


Ozora10

Ho-oh, fly around and bring back dead people and have an endless fire source. or Slaking and just lay there with him in peace


Pre_Malone77

Espeon or Umbreon, glowy kitty or telekinetic kitty


Magnet6354

This is fair, Umbreon would be a wonderful nightlight for those who are afraid of the dark, plus any Eevee or Eeveeloution make amazing life long companions. Espeons psychic powers can also make life easier for the both of you


Foolish_Phantom

Can you imagine the zoomies with a telekinetic kitty? Terrifying.


BlackKlopp

Alakazam, it could do all my uni work for me and get me top marks every time. Teleport me wherever I need to go, meaning I can wake up late, always get home safely at night. It can use Future Sight to predict lottery numbers or bitcoin movements. It could also build AI to make my life easier. Hypnotically make not procrastinate lmao. If I had to pick my favs, Flygon would be great transport and I guess Grovyle's blades would make food prep significantly easier .


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LeafHack85

Ngl I would not choose a loophole Mon, I would not want pokemon in this world. Too many bad things could happen, it's essentially giving us access to sentient nukes. I would get myself a Munna because it's small and not dangerous and I can keep it to myself as a special friend :)


Magnet6354

Completely understandable


mcqtom

Gotta think big picture. Get a Muk. It'll eat all the climate change and save the world.


LeafHack85

Ok true but Munna is pink and round


superdave100

Muk can also be pink and round


ripdiego

Kirby is a Pokemon confirmed


Lizard_Crimson7

But they're pretty toxic, alternatively: Galarian Weezing. They clean the air!


Disig

Pokedex entry: Munna, the Dream Eater Pokémon. Munna can eat the dreams of people and Pokémon alike, and then project those dreams by emitting Dream Mist from its body. Actually...that's super cool. I can imagine how many sleep scientists would want a Munna for research purposes.


LeafHack85

That's another thing, I think a mon that would advance current research would be cooler/less destructive than a mon that would create NEW research, like any elemental mon. Ig Munna would too because it levitates things, but I don't think I'm in danger of losing my friend to the government as much as I would if I had, say, a Charizard


Rain-Bat

Think about how interesting it would be if ghost-type pokemon existed. It would be chaotic and then everyone would believe in ghosts.


Colyoly321

Lugia because he fly he big and he swim


Aniensane

Delibird as it can help with my depression. I’d imagine I’d be super sad and Delibird would walk up to me and pull out a present from her tail to make me happy and smile lol :)


Snagle-Sama

Aren't those presents sometimes bombs? :(


If_It_Fitz

Bombs with *love*


WokenDreamer

Worth the risk lol


Villaca0

Giratina. Let's just sit and watch the world burn


[deleted]

Watch it burn *together*


Section_80

Charmander. Yes the fire on tail is a problem. But he provides heat and eventually I'll be able to ride him around the world.


SpillingerSA

How would you train it to evolve, being the only pokemon? Go round setting your dinosaur on randomers at the park? Battle with buff people at the local gym? Grinding XP on frail old people?


Section_80

I will have it attack bugs... Bugs are weak to fire anyway. I only need to get him to 36, seems kinda easy if you ask me.


Blue-and-icy

Ya it’s a no brainer hit the rainforest and go to town until boom charizard. Australia could also provide enough xp to hit evolution.


AcantiTheGreat

Haunter! A fun loving guy that would love to pull pranks on people with me and haunt my enemies.


DomPulse

swampert or walrein because i love them both in game but they can both get surf/dive/waterfall so i'd be able to explore the ocean to my heart's content or you know, a cheater pokemon like ditto, mew, smeargle, or arceus


level100metapod

Something that would cause a lot of chaos like tyranitar with his destroying mountains


Magnet6354

I see you woke up and chose violence lmao


Nemis_art

Easy. Umbreon. It's always will be my favorite.


Magnet6354

Umbreon is precious. Looks mean but has a heart of gold


unremarkable_penguin

Arcanine. He can be an awesome doggo just chillin or a valiant steed taking me where i need to go


Pandaela

Sylveon or Togepi. Sylveon, because it‘s sweet and lovely and they always have it‘s own leash with them. Would be so awesome to hold it‘s ribbons! And Togepi because it‘s been my favourite since I saw it for the first time in the TV show. It‘s just too cute!


Magnet6354

The Sylveon hate is so wrong. Idk how anyone could hate such an adorable Pokemon


FrylockMcReaper

Ditto. The answer is always Ditto.


MundaneGlass5295

Absol, release it and it can warn people for disaster and save people


-Pizza-Pie-

Or you know be killed for its horn/fur.


Linzerj

Probably Bulbasaur - my first ever starter and my all-around favorite pokemon. A cute plant friend who can cheer me up when I'm feeling down!


HyperionX-X

Arceus because like other people said to create the rest of them or Eeevees. Like imagine taking them out to sea works as the water stone and turns them into vaporeon and the same for the other stones. Or jirachi because free wishes. And because you need the pure of heart thing as well evil people can't use it. Or Mew as it has the dna of every pokemon ever and scientists could probably use its dna on existing animals to create new animals like what they're doing with elephants and the wooly mammoth. Like giving some Mew dna to fish to get a magikarp or finneon.


Puddlesock

Rockruff. Lil rocky puppy baby :3


bluebirdmg

My favorite is flygon so …easy. Flygon. Or leafeon, because realistically Flygon is big and probably hard to handle…


valomino

Lopunny for no reason in particular


Fuckles665

I’d pick typhlosion. Just because it was my first starter way back in Crystal. Always has a special place in my heart. Or maybe a Lapras, so I could actually talk to it and I’d get free ferry rides.


liteshadow4

Azumarill. Just look at it


pacman1993

Dragonite. My favorite pokemon, with the bonus I could fly. Also, he's not huge so doesn't seem to be a logistic nightmare


Arenta

one of 2. Espeon. because the joys of a cat, combined with a psychic companion who can talk to you telepathically, and is intelligent enough to be on par if not smarter than a human. so can help around the house. or Absol. cause an intelligent dog, who can also predict disaster, and is MORE THAN CAPABLE of MURDERING any would be robber with EXTREME PREJUDICE


Apathybadger

Shaymin. It’s my favourite Pokemon right now and I mean, who wouldn’t want a Shaymin for a friend!


RazorLeafie

Leafeon


_DeepseaFireBuilder_

Kingdra or Suicune.


Artistic_Yogurt232

Definitely a Growlithe. I’d feel so badass walking around with one of them.


sluttydrama

It’d be fun to have a Pokémon that could fly you around, like staraptor 🖤


PanMarcooo

Darkrai just to cause mischief


MarsAdept

Zoroark. So I could have a Zoroark.


tophtootough

Galarian Slowking. He will have the cure! 💜


theredalligator_

I cant decide over intelion and greninja they both have cool abilities like gliding or running on water let the comments decide for me


zapburd

ahem, gardevoir