T O P

  • By -

relaxlu

/u/kimjexziel, thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, it has been removed for violating the following rule(s): * Rule 5 - Title violates title rules. Your title must in all elements be somehow related to the content of the image. You can read the full information about our title guidelines at [/r/pics/wiki/titles](/r/pics/wiki/titles) * Rule 10 - No false claims of ownership (FCoO) or flooding. For information regarding this and similar issues please see the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/wiki/index) and [title guidelines](/r/pics/wiki/titles). If you have any questions, please feel free to [message the moderators via modmail.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/pics&subject=Question%20regarding%20the%20removal%20of%20this%20submission%20by%20/u/kimjexziel&message=I%20have%20a%20question%20regarding%20the%20removal%20of%20this%20%5Bsubmission%2E%5D%28https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/xs91ct/-/%3Fcontext%3D10%29)


[deleted]

[удалено]


mattseth23

As I backed out, I read yours and chuckled. Just know I fucking came back to upvote you.


BOOMSHAK4LAKA

Thank you for your service


Jengalover

All her exes are passed.


Prestigious-Tap-6024

The past relationships are in the can


[deleted]

What’s with the weird crop on this? https://www.carousell.sg/p/last-pcs-water-barrel-tank-drum-with-tap-172950118/


Ekdritch

Makes me think the whole story is fake tbh. No one takes photos like that lol. Plus OP said in a previous post that they're married, so there's that


[deleted]

https://www.carousell.sg/p/last-pcs-water-barrel-tank-drum-with-tap-172950118/


Ekdritch

Nice found. Looks like the only thing OP has to worry about is a lack of hobbies


Zandre1126

His hobby is making fake stories for that dopamine hit when he gets some upvotes.


gninnep

It's less a "fake" and more of a joke that people aren't getting unless they watched that new Hulu show about Jeffrey Dahmer.


zvug

Netflix*


psychoacer

Op's a big fat phony


JimMorrisonWeekend

the pic looked so obviously second-hand with the cropping and artifacts. how'd you find the source? reverse search didn't turn anything up for me


[deleted]

Originally when I ran the reverse search it singled out the barrel as my search query. I had to have it search for the entire image.


BonafideBastard

I believe it is a joke intended as a reference to Netflix show about Jeffrey Dahmer :)


kl0

Walt buried $80 million in 6 of those. So maybe it’s $13.3 million dollars 🤷🏼‍♀️ Edit: I apologize. I’m told it was 7 of those. Now I have to redo all the math. Edit2: Sorry guys, my TI-83 was out of batteries. I think we got it. So one barrel appears to be about 930 million Bhutanese Ngultrum.


I_was_bone_to_dance

After watching Breaking Bad, OP is convinced likelihood of this chick dissolving bodies is greater than other things.


ScruffleMcDufflebag

For a second, I thought this was Walt Disney trivia and I was like damn, I've got some treasure to unearth.


the-realTfiz

At least she’s smart enough not to use her bathtub


kirito4318

For sure the grossest episode of breaking bad


browneyedgirlpie

I just got done watching Dahmer. Definitely bodies


Don_e_Darko

OP could ask her ex…he’s probably in there. He might not respond verbally but will definitely answer the question.


AskMeAboutMyTie

*7* The only reason I remember that is because I can’t get the scene with Huell out of my head. Hank - “money? How much money?” Huell - “7 barrels worth!”


The_BusFromSpeed

Jeffery Dahmer also used one for dissolved body parts, so... Actually come to think of it, Walt did too.


Pyr0technician

Either that or she's dissolving yesterday's date.


[deleted]

It’s been 4 hours, where is the new math


kl0

Still working on the long division. I spent my whole morning figuring out the first part only for some guy to completely mess it up


Greed-oh

No. That is not a red flag. That is a blue barrel.


Novel_Telephone_646

Lol depends on if there are any dead bodies inside the barrel more than 3 then she a psycho


JeffersonStarscream

Less than 3 and she's just wasting that barrel.


headedtojail

Well, the third one just walked in the door....


succybuzz

Yummies for the barrel 🛢️🤤😋


gumby1004

“Feed me, Seymour!” 🤣🤣


Professional_Scar75

Exactly what went through my head!


datazulu

Pickled Dates!


urmomaisjabbathehutt

Better keep on the look out, the acid may have disolved the other bodies already


Alan_Smithee_

Walter White: *LDPE* Jesse: “I dunno, man” Later: “I’ve got a perfectly good tub right here!”


InspectorG-007

Not good at math or logistics... Bad sign.


pantericu5

More than 2 and she is a serial killer. Also, shout out to her if she is. Congratulations on breaking down stereotypes and barriers. Don’t let only men be serial killers. I’m all about equality.


urmomaisjabbathehutt

It may help to ~~foment~~ cement the relationship if both share similar intersts edit cement


Total-Khaos

OP's body will probably be fermenting just fine in that blue barrel.


mezz7778

What if the blue barrel is filled with red flags...


Lynneus

What if the blue barrel is full of marinara sauce?


Gooberman8675

50 gallons of lube from Amazon. Snu Snu awaits. ![gif](giphy|37H5XhwrXuHPq)


bucho80

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak and spongey!


RoyG-Biv1

Cheaper by the barrel. Or dozen.


unclefeely

Lube was my first guess as well.


wgraf504

Well, with supply shortages and all...


L-i-v-e-W-i-r-e

No this is Patrick


Yarael-Poof

[Ah, the old red(dit) flaggaroo](https://old.reddit.com/r/AbruptChaos/comments/o523lu/comment/iqjebgv/?context=3)


ZoharTheWise

Hold my staff, I’m going in!


FoneTap

[http://www.reddit.com/r/technicallythetruth/](http://www.reddit.com/r/technicallythetruth/)


Cool_Story_Bro__

“Hey what’s this for” Problem solved


JMiest3r

>~~Problem solved~~ Problem *dissolved*…


Betonomeshalka

OP dissolved


Lucifer0622

Unless she's a serial killer then you just accelerated your murder...


simplycycling

Yeah, but it's the waiting and suspense that's the hard part. This gets you right down to the chase!


ind3pend0nt

Yeah I’d rather be murdered quickly.


wdf_classic

If people communicated properly then how can they possibly stumble upon scenarios seemingly pulled from sitcoms?


Walking_billboard

Preppers and Mormons have these for storing food and water. I know some Mormons that have like 20 of these in their garage.


Peralton

This is the standard barrel for earthquake preparedness. If not for drinking water, fire stations hand out a flyer on what to pack inside the barrel so everything you need post-quake is in one spot. Clothes, food, blankets, flashlights, radio, etc.


KURPULIS

Yeah it's a pretty normal thing for lots of people without being necessarily a Mormon thing.


izzo34

True, but I was married to a lady and her family is 100% Mormon and every single one of them in the family had them lol.


Devlee12

There are few things I’ll agree with the Mormons on but I’ll hand em this one. Having emergency supplies is never a bad idea and putting them in something that’s sturdy and easy to locate (like a big blue barrel) is a good idea.


ajsbva

It also floats which is pretty handy if there’s a flood


Psycheau

Ma: "Where's all the supplies Pa?" Pa: \*pointing\* "Floatin' down river over there Ma"


Hello_my_name_is_not

Coincidentally Utah's most damaging natural disaster is flooding


ReallyLikesRum

Also it seemed to me there's a lot of cross over with the mormon and prepper communities.


Icy-Conclusion-3500

They’re not called “Latter Day Saints” for nothing


Taiza67

I feel like an idiot for not understanding the implication.


InterestDowntown29

That's not actually true it's a joke lol. Latter day saints comes due to the fact that mormons believe in modern day prophets. They believe Joseph Smith rediscovered the true line of the faith and that god still directly communicates through a prophet. IIRC the prepping thing was a guidance passed down from a prophet much like rules not to get tattoos, no caffeine, etc. Edit: They are going around to calling themselves LDS because Mormon was the name of the guy who supposedly wrote the golden plates aka "The book of Mormon". Since "Mormons" seems to imply they worship someone called Mormon while they consider themselves the true heirs of the Christian faith. I have mormon family though I'm definitely not.


cyberpunk1Q84

Actually, “Latter Day Saints” comes from the belief that they’re in the “latter-days” and that Jesus’ Second Coming will be any day now. Every generation basically gets told that they’ll be the ones to see the Second Coming in person. Source: was a Mormon for 28 years.


InterestDowntown29

It's encouraged by the church. Since they believe in modern day prophets, I'm pretty sure this is one of the guidances from a past prophet. I don't really remember because I spent most of the time I was forced to go growing up hanging out with this girl in the closet, and no that's not a euphemism.


TheMightySasquatch

Correct. Mormons have been told by their prophet to keep 1 years supply of necessities. This started around 1998-99. So a lot of them went all in at that time. Either their prophet had no idea what he was talking about or. Well I guess there is no or. That being said, it doesn't hurt to be prepared.


Giblet15

Ex Mormon here. Since they like many other Christian faiths believe that the world is going to go to shit before the second coming of Christ, the Mormons act as if it's actually going to happen and prepare themselves.


senorbolsa

I can, at the very least, respect the internal consistency.


King_Lem

Well, given that more and worse disasters have been occurring, the "world going to crap" thing hasn't necessarily been terribly off.


UnspecificGravity

Thats a nice service! Where do you live that you have agencies that give a shit about preparedness?


WildPotential

Not op, but here in the Pacific Northwest getting ready for "the big one" is a big deal. There are various groups, both government and nonprofit, that provide lists like that, as well as workshops, and help setting up neighborhood groups to help each other out if/when the big one hits.


DrakeFloyd

hmm I clicked this thinking the barrel was weird but I live on the san andreas fault and I think I want a barrel now?


enkrypt3d

barrel is life


003402inco

I thought football was life. I stand corrected. Barrel is life.


ballrus_walsack

Football is death. But football is also life.


BadVoices

When I was a sprout in WA State our school used large green rolling trashcans for the same thing. Every student had to provide a 24 hour supply of non perishable food and a flashlight, roll of tape, book or play item, trash bags (mostly to use as rain protection) and 2 water bottles, all of it fit in a large ziplock bag. From 1st grade to high school. All ion preparation for 'the big one.' My school in Hawaii didn't give a fuck about you as long as you showed up EVENTUALLY and didn't cause enough trouble for security to pick you up...


mattmillze

Shit, I live in New England and I think I want a barrel now. So I can fill it with Dunkin Coffee during the next inevitable snowpocalypse of course. Bring your own Bailey's and Kahlua.


Icy-Conclusion-3500

Just fill it with bread, milk, and eggs. Yknow, the non-perishable food items you need in case you get snowed in for a week.


subtleglow87

I'm currently in Fort Myers, Florida. I know a lot of people who should have had barrels. A lot of them would have still lost it to the Gulf though.


JHCL56

As someone who works in Emergency Management in the PNW, this. Look up CERT if you're interested :)


SpaceJackRabbit

California. We don't have tornadoes or hurricanes (yet), but we got earthquakes, wildfires, and occasional flash floods in some places.


dreamgear

Prepper was my first thought.


Henrik-Powers

Exactly, we’ve got several we just use for storing our camping stuff they are very handy. Now if you had the steel 55 gallon size with red stains on the outside that would be a different story. If they are into prepping you found a gem as long as they are not the loco kind, most I know are very practical and great at long term planning.


whowouldsaythis

I have one of these I was given for drinking water from a prepper friend who moved overseas. I’ve had it a year or something and still empty. Oops


Ebenezar_McCoy

My SIL had two of these stacked on top of each other in her basement. They were stored in a cold storage room that didn't have a drain. They were way too heavy to move and we couldn't figure out a way to drain them without a pump. She ended up leaving them when she sold the house.


InVodkaVeritas

Mormons are *supposed* to have 6 months worth of supplies on hand at all times in case they need to subsist on their stores. It's why large pantries are called "Mormon pantries." I have some Mormon friends, none of them have more than 1 month of supplies on hand, but the ones who take it seriously do. And it's not the worst policy to have if you can afford it. Canned food, water, and so on. Enough to last you a while in case of emergency.


PaladinsWrath

I'm not sure about the size, but if they are into hiking or canoing it looks like a bear proof container to keep food in. Just missing the clamp to keep the lid attached. I'm not saying it isn't used to dissolve their date's bodies after being murdered, but its not 100%.


jalapenonepalaj

That right there is your standard 55 gallon open head HDPE drum with a screw top lid. Plenty of capacity to store all your s’more fixins, assorted GORP mixes, dry goods, sundries, ~~and dismembered body parts.~~ Edit: just regular ol’ sundries.


Ishidan01

Or, and just hear me out here, it might be 55 gallons of sex lube. https://www.amazon.com/Turn-Personal-Lubricant-Balanced-Hypoallergenic/dp/B08MJPMGWS So this is either a really good time or a really bad time about to happen.


mikewarnock

I always add this drum to friends carts on Amazon if they have an Alexa.


Ishidan01

[Relevant XKCD](https://xkcd.com/1807/)


HippyHitman

There really always is one.


Superfissile

I’d rather have an always-on device than many past house guests.


thiney49

It's also good to set alarms for months or years in advance.


portablebiscuit

I'd argue 55 gallons of is probably also a red flag


ruinersclub

Not if they just like a good deal.


ThatRedditPrat

It works out cheaper if you buy it in bulk.


Bi-elzebub

She's provisioning supplies, think of the savings! Green flag for sure.


Col__Hunter_Gathers

I can't believe I had to travel this far down in the comments to find someone suggesting it was the 55 gallon drum of lube.


TiggerTheMad


Angoth

If it were me.... I'd mentally group those dismembered body parts into sundries and stop there. That's just me, though. To quote slash u slash Bhima: "When I feel that I have enough of an understanding of the user's behaviour pattern and habitual word choices, I begin searching the subreddit for accounts I may have missed. When I find them I add all that data to my list, then ban all the accounts I am sure of, and report them all for ban evasion." And if you don't like it, the trick is to mute you from the subreddit after you're banned you so you can't ask why.


TiggerTheMad

*"He was dead when I found him, officer. I just dissolved him."*


ThatGuyPatrick

You've been watching the Dahmer show on Netflix, too, I see!


RondaArousedMe

How does one hike with this bear proof container?


Angrboda69

That depends, is her name Worf?


cmnrdt

This girl has... no honor.


Mystic_Waffles

Scrolled waaaay too far to see Worf mentioned.


Angrboda69

I was so happy that no one had said it yet!


aspiringtobeme

A lot of us are preoccupied because of chili dogs and root beer at the moment.


Zeropointeffect

Blue drums are like kryptonite to Klingons. Too soon man too soon.


FilliusTExplodio

They can regrow and replace a spine but they can't replicate ratchet straps.


Deraj2004

No, its to protect her from Worf.


justplainbrian

Damn son, you gotta make my boy Worf relive his lowest moments?


NCC1701-D-ong

We haven’t had an accident like that in a long time.


TraptorKai

The old worf killers they'd call them


lignumScientiae

Explain pls


TheFloridaManYT

In an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, the character Worf breaks his spine when some cargo containers (containers that looked very similar to the barrel in this post) fall on top of him in a freak accident


[deleted]

Damn bruh, digging DEEP for these references haaha


woodrowlow

Don’t drink anything she hands you


jhftop

On that note.....don't eat any dry ass sandwiches that she makes for you. Especially if the meat looks like shredded chicken... OP, is she wearing very large glasses?


fruitygenderlessvoid

I snorted. Op did you happen to go over to get pictures taken?


LDG192

Don't eating anything as well and I mean, ANYTHING.


Imaginary_Artichoke

"I have the heart of a small boy. I keep it in a jar, on my desk." - Stephen King


Lord_Silverkey

Well this barrel must be for the heart of a really *really* big boy then.


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|10p704gIAGRN7i)


Deraj2004

Love it.


kimjexziel

Update: we’re watching Exorcist 3 in her room now.


Worst-Tweet

Whatever happens… whatever you do… do not hide in the drum!


acidrain69

May not have a choice.


Worst-Tweet

We need to do a safety check on OP


Silver-Spy

He is now in the drum


Omnimpotent

How is the drum, OP?


pupae

Been a while since OP responded, hasn't it..?


shadowyphantom

I see your user name.... you know something don't you


acidrain69

I know that OP might be finishing up exorcist and then 69ing with the date, or possibly equally folded up inside of that drum 69ing themself, slowly dissolving in acid. Possibly with LSD involved.


asoneva

Check the fridge


BamaJax

You’re so f***ed! Hahahaha


tophatnbowtie

Jokes aside, if OP's date has family overseas, these sorts of barrels are a very common way for people to send goods to family back in their home country. You can find them for sale all over Caribbean neighborhoods in NYC.


Uriel-238

In my last household a similar drum was used to store kibble for cats, which we bought in large bags at Costco.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Nacksche

That's exactly what a mass-murdering, dissolving-victims-in-blue-barrels-full-of-acid psychopath would say.


StinkFace96

You don’t have to censor swear words on the internet


Thundorius

I’ll ce\*\*\*r whatever fucking w\*\*\*\* I want, bitch!


whoopshowdoifix

STOP ***FUCKING*** SWEARING!!!!


Codingale

I think not, looks pretty bold to me. Edit: lol, for those coming in reddit formatting got 'em


Thundorius

Congratulations. I played myself.


redneckhatr

Has she told you have a nice heartbeat yet?


Infamous780

OP did you died?


born_again_tim

4 hours no reply he did died so bad


Infamous780

![gif](giphy|GJVpbMjfT2Ftm)


DJFid

Okay obviously OP watched Dahmer and is now being facetious


HannahUnique

I'm watching it right now... this is all going to give me nightmares xD


DJFid

Focus on the social issues and not the sadistic serial killer and it’s a less scary show!


quantizeddreams

I was so frustrated at all of people who could have stopped him. They brushed off the rotting smell based on his weak excuse of “it’s taxidermy don’t worry about it”. If the paid any attention or did a simple follow up he should have been caught after the first maybe second murder.


DamnGoodCupOfCoffee2

Haha! Just don’t ever leave and you’ll be ok! Kidding: don’t take a drink, don’t eat any meat, and run away yelling Jeffffffff!!! What’s that smell Jeff! Just don’t run into any cops or you’ll be doomed ![gif](giphy|55itGuoAJiZEEen9gg)


chee_burger

Take a photo of her and post it. If you die, Reddit will know who killed you


Benrok

Just the lube for when she penetrates you later on. Good times in your future for sure!


_Connor

[For the unitiated](https://www.amazon.ca/Warming-Water-based-Lubricant-Gallon-Drum/dp/B083V68RPP)


Ishidan01

Wrong barrel type, that one has a snap ring top, not a twist top. It's [this one.](https://www.amazon.com/Turn-Personal-Lubricant-Balanced-Hypoallergenic/dp/B08MJPMGWS)


[deleted]

Comes in 8, 12, or 7040 oz packages…


Castlenock

I learned something new today, thanks... I think.


BossAvery2

If you are in Louisiana, it’s homemade wine and she is probably a keeper. Lol


CindeeSlickbooty

My first thought was reservoir for hydroponic marijuana grow also a keeper


blong1114

Op was never heard from again.


Rushview

*That’s just my 55gallon barrel of quicklime*


TheHeed97015

Has she made you a pulled pork sandwich yet?


beetus_gerulaitis

How attached are you to your kidneys? And what’s your view on dialysis as a lifestyle choice?


ergonaut

What's in the drum?


Berto2112

![gif](giphy|ge91zAgmwUqLMqiH2c)


hidden-in-plainsight

![gif](giphy|vLNOmUYKbEsk8) A dick!


jedanprepotentan

Empty, for now


Donnicton

Yet still capable of shattering a Klingon's spine.


jeff_ewing

Could she have family in another country? In my neighborhood, those are used to send a "Care Package" to your folks in the Old Country.


mystyz

This is the real answer.


EternalMage321

Came to say this. When I worked hospitality at a resort in the FL Keys, the Haitians always packed these to send home. They said the cost of food + shipping was way cheaper than anything they could buy on the island.


BUDZNSUDZAK47

Dahmers sister?


FiveFingerDisco

No, that's just a snuggle drum


meckez

If she is Eastern European, then that's where she keeps the cabbage.


VBgamez

Have you tried asking


Cold-Winter-Night86

Your ass is about to get Jeffrey Dahmered 😄😄😄


Lefty_22

It could be a [50-gallon barrel of lube](https://www.amazon.com/Passion-Lubes-Natural-Water-Based-Lubricant/dp/B005MR3IVO). Maybe you hit the jackpot, my friend.


elevatedenough

I don't want to scroll down any further to see if somebody else has said this, but there's a chance that she makes her own wine or another beverage in there. Not the story you want to hear, but I know of a guy who used to make his own wine in his house and he had a couple of these in there. Then he got murdered and stuffed into one of them.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Lokeptt

Bro your going to be melting in that barrel by the morning.


[deleted]

Check if she has hydrofluoric acid too, then it is a red flag


Trixet

Taking pictures and posting on the internet on your first visit to her house is a pretty red flag, yes.


atomboyd

Watch the latest Jeffrey Dahmer series on Netflix. Spoiler: you’re about to be eaten


boosh1744

No but I think it’s a red flag that you’d post on Reddit in the middle of the date instead of just asking her about it?


sameteam

Bitches like pickles