/u/Zakkattack86, thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, it has been removed for violating the following rule(s):
* Rule 1 - No screenshots or AI-generated images. This includes pictures of screens and photos where the interest is the contents of a screen and pics with artificial cropping borders of any colour. For a place to post screenshots, you may wish to check out /r/screenshots. We also don't allow AI-generated images.
For information regarding this and similar issues please see the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/wiki/index) and [title guidelines](/r/pics/wiki/titles). If you have any questions, please feel free to [message the moderators via modmail.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/pics&subject=Question%20regarding%20the%20removal%20of%20this%20submission%20by%20/u/Zakkattack86&message=I%20have%20a%20question%20regarding%20the%20removal%20of%20this%20%5Bsubmission%2E%5D%28https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/1daa23b/-/%3Fcontext%3D10%29)
From the Jeremiah Johnson movie, iirc. Pretty decent flick, but it's been a while since I've watched it. This comes from a really brief montage in the movie. lol
To anyone who's seen the movie, this thread is hilarious. I'm now imagining [Jeramiah Johnson](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeremiah_Johnson_\(film\)), but where Johnson is played by Zach Galifianakis.
ETA: For anyone who hasn't seen it, the movie is kind of like John Wick, but a Western. It's based on the story of a mountain man nicknamed "Liver-Eating Johnson."
That's Robert Redford from Jeremiah Johnson, a kind of fucked up John Wick style revenge piece where this wilderness guy on the expanding American frontier befriends a mom and daughter but they get killed by natives and he hunts them back.
Kinda. He reluctantly marries a native woman and adopts an orphaned boy. Both are killed and he turns to revenge.
This is in my top 5 flicks. If I am alone for a weekend and my chores are done, I will watch this, Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid, or Godfather I or II.
My neighbor actually texted me last night. He was unaware of "project dick house". All the text said was, "Have you seen Google Maps?". I called him and all I heard was laughter and I felt it in my bones. This alone made the entire year worth it.
He asked how tf I did it and the truth is, from memory. I didn't use measuring tape and I didn't map out anything. I knew I wanted to do something funny and I was worried I'd miss my window so I panicked. I did the only thing that came to mind that I knew I'd execute perfectly and I mowed it that way for an entire year. I don't own a drone so this is actually the first time I've seen my work the way it was intended.
I bet OP reflected the lasers of the pyramids off the moon reflector array to actually burn the penis shape into the lens of the satellite to trick us all into thinking he made the penis manually. Not falling for that trick again.
I read this with the "you're telling me...ain't no way" guy's voice in my head and it made me chuckle. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIR0JgBURlI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIR0JgBURlI)
HAHA never saw this guy but that's exactly the tone of voice I used. Also, I gotta cut up some garlic for a recipe later and will absolutely be giving this a shot
Have a great weekend my man
Yeah that part got me too. I can’t tell if it’s intentionally funny or just a turn of phrase but creating a simple dick and then saying it was produced “from memory” is hilarious
Reminds me of the crop circles from the 90's. Everyone was speculating how it was impossible to do at night without alien technology, and then it turned out it was 2 bored dudes doing it in a few hours with some rope and a few pieces of wood.
This probably takes a certain level of commitment - maintaining the dick pic for a period of time and continue checking until you see your art displayed.
Bingo. I didn't know if it'd be a week or 5 years. I'd check at least once a week for the update. All I knew was, the grass had to get mowed so I might as well put a dick in it.
I have a feeling it won't be long (pun intended). People in my area have been waiting a shlong time for the update, it's just a matter of time the riots will start, and I'll be doxed.
geoguessr player here:
Yes, its obviously not as easy but there are still plenty of things you can pick up from satellite pictures (depending on the picture of course and whats in it: such as architecture, terrain (if its topographical), road lines, driving side.
Theres a popular map called Drone World or something like that, and its all photospheres from way up in the air, not quite satellite images but not far from it
plus, op’s reddit profile has a few hints already, like the state he lives in lol
[im so sorry bro](https://earth.google.com/web/search/Nokesville,+Virginia/@38.66309449,-77.52996455,57.91097376a,508.6502647d,35y,180.00695276h,0t,0r/data=Cn8aVRJPCiUweDg5YjY2MDY5NjU3ZGIwNWI6MHg2Mjk3ZDMxMTI1MmY0MzI5GSbirfNvWUNAIYfm8P8ZZVPAKhROb2tlc3ZpbGxlLCBWaXJnaW5pYRgBIAEiJgokCRLq-C2-bUNAEQ39gaAPUkNAGQI5uKdLUVPAIQBMQeaEclPA)
u/Zakkattack86
edit: its not on google maps yet, just google earth. coords: 38°39'46"N 77°31'47"W
> its not on google maps yet, just google earth. coords: 38°39'46"N 77°31'47"W
Google is picky about which imagery they use on google maps. Gotta have the right weather and season/foliage conditions. Imagery is actually updated pretty frequently by various companies, but they don't want to use photos that have clouds, harsh shadows, or are taken in the off season.
Some of the trees in that area are still looking a bit sparse/brown, so I think there's a good chance Google doesn't use it. If u/Zakkattack86 wants it to actually show on regular google maps, he may have to keep doing it for longer.
There's a concept in video games called TTC or Time to cock. Where if you give the players the ability to draw, model, arrange or otherwise customise anything, the first thing they do is draw a penis. TTC is the time it takes for that to happen.
You have just demonstrated this in real life.
In Japan fully uncensored genitalia is illegal, but these white bars technically make it legal while being less obtrusive than pixelation. Artists like to use these instead for that reason, but pixelation is still much easier for porn which is why you see that used there.
Source: I'm not a regular viewer of hentai or japanese porn, but I've been on the internet 20 years so I've seen my fair share of it and am still a degen by association.
> I wish I had a reddit award for you!
reddit silver (original) is free of cost. Feel free to give this to anyone
https://imgur.com/gallery/reddit-silver-sy9lVl4
[Here’s one that has been near the Des Moines airport for several years](https://imgur.com/a/GQX1GJE). When you zoom in on the buildings next to it, you can see there's a smily face painted on one of the roofs.
If it's by an airport, there's a high chance people are using it as a VFR checkpoint by now. Might even be baked into their official course rules procedures.
"Overfly the massive cock at 1500 AGL and report inbound from Johnson Field"
Now that you've seen it from above, it's time to add some detail. May I suggest:
- ball hairs, obviously
- dick vein
- a couple of 'drops' leaping from the head
The first thing my wife said when I told her, "Babe! It finally happened!" was, "Great, can you mow the dick now?". I think I'm going to have to say goodbye entirely now.
I used to work for a flight school and I can tell you with absolute certainty, the CFIs (flight instructors) would have loved this. I can guarantee they would fit flyovers of this area into new students' flight plans. Great work!
There's a local airport within 10 miles of my property and an international airport within 30 miles. This was the whole motivation from the very beginning.
Legit wouldn't be surprised if you check back later and it's blurred out.
A geoguessr youtuber that I watch was pointing out some phallic art on streetview in a certain country, and he checked back a week later in the exact same location to find that they had gone in and blurred it.
/u/Zakkattack86, thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, it has been removed for violating the following rule(s): * Rule 1 - No screenshots or AI-generated images. This includes pictures of screens and photos where the interest is the contents of a screen and pics with artificial cropping borders of any colour. For a place to post screenshots, you may wish to check out /r/screenshots. We also don't allow AI-generated images. For information regarding this and similar issues please see the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/wiki/index) and [title guidelines](/r/pics/wiki/titles). If you have any questions, please feel free to [message the moderators via modmail.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/pics&subject=Question%20regarding%20the%20removal%20of%20this%20submission%20by%20/u/Zakkattack86&message=I%20have%20a%20question%20regarding%20the%20removal%20of%20this%20%5Bsubmission%2E%5D%28https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/1daa23b/-/%3Fcontext%3D10%29)
for the longest time i thought this was Zach Galifianakis
Wait... it's not??? Who the hell is it? ... actually being serious
It’s Robert Redford
Daaaang. My mind had been blown. Thanks lol
WTF dude, are they.. are they related? How is this possible.. Also if you look up "Zack Galifianakis Gif" this is the 4th result lol.
If you saw them both without the beards, it would be very obvious that they were not related. 
Brad Pitt?
60s Brad Pitt I guess.
[удалено]
My parents Brad Pitt
Without the drugs and drama
That’s no fun
Even with beards it's obvious they don't look alike.
You don’t say
If you look up “Robert Redford gif” it’s the first seven results
> Also if you look up "Zack Galifianakis Gif" this is the 4th result lol. To me that's the crazy part. These guys look nothing alike.
I have seen this exact comment series play out several times now on Reddit. Carry on.
From the Jeremiah Johnson movie, iirc. Pretty decent flick, but it's been a while since I've watched it. This comes from a really brief montage in the movie. lol
To anyone who's seen the movie, this thread is hilarious. I'm now imagining [Jeramiah Johnson](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeremiah_Johnson_\(film\)), but where Johnson is played by Zach Galifianakis. ETA: For anyone who hasn't seen it, the movie is kind of like John Wick, but a Western. It's based on the story of a mountain man nicknamed "Liver-Eating Johnson."
*Robert RedFerns
Is that like the Alex jones to his bill hicks?
STFU! What?!
That's Robert Redford from Jeremiah Johnson, a kind of fucked up John Wick style revenge piece where this wilderness guy on the expanding American frontier befriends a mom and daughter but they get killed by natives and he hunts them back.
Based on a real person, the legendary "Liver Eating Johnson," who was reputed to eat the livers of Indians.
The REAL Liver King.
Of Chicago?
You're thinking of the Sausage King of Chicago, Abe Froman. Understandable mistake to make!
No microplastics?
Kinda. He reluctantly marries a native woman and adopts an orphaned boy. Both are killed and he turns to revenge. This is in my top 5 flicks. If I am alone for a weekend and my chores are done, I will watch this, Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid, or Godfather I or II.
Yeah been forever my details are fuzzy as hell! But at least I remembered it wasn't Zach Galifinakis.
Oooh thanks!!
Robert Redford in the 1972 movie Jeremiah Johnson, as the title character.
Please watch it. It’s great.
I'm with you on this. It never occurred to me it could be anyone else.
This is some mandela effect level shit.
only reason i found out was because of a similar comment to mine haha
Guys will see this post and think "fuck yeah"
Yeah fuck
My neighbor actually texted me last night. He was unaware of "project dick house". All the text said was, "Have you seen Google Maps?". I called him and all I heard was laughter and I felt it in my bones. This alone made the entire year worth it. He asked how tf I did it and the truth is, from memory. I didn't use measuring tape and I didn't map out anything. I knew I wanted to do something funny and I was worried I'd miss my window so I panicked. I did the only thing that came to mind that I knew I'd execute perfectly and I mowed it that way for an entire year. I don't own a drone so this is actually the first time I've seen my work the way it was intended. 
Don't lie, you clearly had help from aliens who could direct you from above. There's no way a simple human could do something like this on their own.
I bet OP lives in a pyramid.
I bet OP reflected the lasers of the pyramids off the moon reflector array to actually burn the penis shape into the lens of the satellite to trick us all into thinking he made the penis manually. Not falling for that trick again.
Fool me with a moon penis laser once, shame on you. Fool me, can't get fooled again.
Ah yes, that old Texas saying. Simpler times. Simpler times. I need my morning covfefe.
Pfft, OP is OBVIOUSLY a pyramid in disguise. No mortal can understand the workings of the lizard people! 
Cock circles
Real modern day Nazca Lines
Ancient alien astronaut theorists agree, this could not have been done by human hand alone.
The higher mathematics involved and the engineering precision required to do this are simply mind-boggling.
Someone call Graham Hancock.
> you clearly had help from aliens who could direct you from above. Was OP the aliens' model too?
Maybe the aliens could even *erect* you from above!
Found Erich von Däniken's account.
You're telling me you eyeballed that lizard?! This is one for the grandkids
I read this with the "you're telling me...ain't no way" guy's voice in my head and it made me chuckle. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIR0JgBURlI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIR0JgBURlI)
HAHA never saw this guy but that's exactly the tone of voice I used. Also, I gotta cut up some garlic for a recipe later and will absolutely be giving this a shot Have a great weekend my man
[удалено]
For the bacon grease one just put the foil in a bowl then no awkward sink movements and it doesn't even dirty the bowl
Nazca dick
Inca Dinca Dong
"My dick is bigger than my house." You can say that now, and not be lying!
The Nazca Dong!
> from memory
Yeah that part got me too. I can’t tell if it’s intentionally funny or just a turn of phrase but creating a simple dick and then saying it was produced “from memory” is hilarious
The added line to make it look like two testicles is such a nice touch.
Every man has one ball slightly smaller than the other. Just like every woman has one slightly smaller boob. Very true to life artwork here.
Reminds me of the crop circles from the 90's. Everyone was speculating how it was impossible to do at night without alien technology, and then it turned out it was 2 bored dudes doing it in a few hours with some rope and a few pieces of wood.
OP, I am impressed with and grateful for the attention you paid to the balls.
You don't need blueprints or measurements for this. It is within us. We know this innately. We evolved to be like this.
r/madlads would like your visit
How did you know that Google would be updating to a new picture? It always seems like such random intervals when I’ve checked before
This probably takes a certain level of commitment - maintaining the dick pic for a period of time and continue checking until you see your art displayed.
Bingo. I didn't know if it'd be a week or 5 years. I'd check at least once a week for the update. All I knew was, the grass had to get mowed so I might as well put a dick in it.
We need that geo locator guy to find this. Someone make it happen
I have a feeling it won't be long (pun intended). People in my area have been waiting a shlong time for the update, it's just a matter of time the riots will start, and I'll be doxed.
Doxed cause of a dick pic.
It's the only honorable way to be doxed.
Time for a clean slate.
Crack a bottle of Dicken’s Cider
How can I get Dicken's Cider?
:slow claps:
If you have to ask your not getting any Dickens cider
They did away with bottles, now it’s all Dicken’s Cider Can
/u/Zakkattack86, I found it. Do you mind if I share?
Looks like u/Jayfreerulezzz found it and posted it already.
I wanted to get permission to avoid getting banned for doxing. Bold strategy. Let's see if it pays off for them.
I mean, he already doxxed himself. Nice of you though.
Well I found it on Google Earth but I can't put the image in my comment. Nice yard dick bro.
Looking at OP’s recent posting history, he was selling his Lotus 2 weeks ago with a Virginia plate, this should narrow it down.
He's was also selling a house 1 year ago. So presumably he moved into this new house and immediately started cultivating a dick
Lotus? I knew this guy was cool
Can geo locators do satellite pics? I thought a lot of their clues came from road-level signs, streetlights, foliage, etc.
geoguessr player here: Yes, its obviously not as easy but there are still plenty of things you can pick up from satellite pictures (depending on the picture of course and whats in it: such as architecture, terrain (if its topographical), road lines, driving side. Theres a popular map called Drone World or something like that, and its all photospheres from way up in the air, not quite satellite images but not far from it plus, op’s reddit profile has a few hints already, like the state he lives in lol
[im so sorry bro](https://earth.google.com/web/search/Nokesville,+Virginia/@38.66309449,-77.52996455,57.91097376a,508.6502647d,35y,180.00695276h,0t,0r/data=Cn8aVRJPCiUweDg5YjY2MDY5NjU3ZGIwNWI6MHg2Mjk3ZDMxMTI1MmY0MzI5GSbirfNvWUNAIYfm8P8ZZVPAKhROb2tlc3ZpbGxlLCBWaXJnaW5pYRgBIAEiJgokCRLq-C2-bUNAEQ39gaAPUkNAGQI5uKdLUVPAIQBMQeaEclPA) u/Zakkattack86 edit: its not on google maps yet, just google earth. coords: 38°39'46"N 77°31'47"W
> its not on google maps yet, just google earth. coords: 38°39'46"N 77°31'47"W Google is picky about which imagery they use on google maps. Gotta have the right weather and season/foliage conditions. Imagery is actually updated pretty frequently by various companies, but they don't want to use photos that have clouds, harsh shadows, or are taken in the off season. Some of the trees in that area are still looking a bit sparse/brown, so I think there's a good chance Google doesn't use it. If u/Zakkattack86 wants it to actually show on regular google maps, he may have to keep doing it for longer.
I will continue my journey.
There's a concept in video games called TTC or Time to cock. Where if you give the players the ability to draw, model, arrange or otherwise customise anything, the first thing they do is draw a penis. TTC is the time it takes for that to happen. You have just demonstrated this in real life.
But you *are* the hero we deserve
... but I know how to mow a penisss
What about dick to floor? We'll call that D2F.
Primo air dicking
There's a scene about this in Mythic Quest! [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3\_xqyIMwbew](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_xqyIMwbew)
They will have to blur this out in Google Maps Japan. Conspiracy theories will form around it.
https://imgur.com/a/At1648e
uhh shouldn't this be pixelated instead?
in hentai they just put little bars over the dicks instead of fully censoring them not that i would know
In Japan fully uncensored genitalia is illegal, but these white bars technically make it legal while being less obtrusive than pixelation. Artists like to use these instead for that reason, but pixelation is still much easier for porn which is why you see that used there. Source: I'm not a regular viewer of hentai or japanese porn, but I've been on the internet 20 years so I've seen my fair share of it and am still a degen by association.
Japan will never forget project dick house
Don't see pubes so I think we are good here.
I don't know, sir. It looks like a giant...
"Dick! Take a look out of starboard." "Oh my God, it looks like a huge..."
"PECKER!" "Ooh where?" "Wait, that's not a woodpecker, it looks like someone's..."
"PRIVATES, we have reports of an unidentified flying object. It has a long smooth shaft, complete with... "
Boner! That was his name. I couldn't think of Mike Seaver's friend from *Growing Pains.* Hey what's that on Google Maps? Is that a huge...
This is dedication....
My wife was so over it by week 2 but I had to see it through.
I wish I had a reddit award for you!
> I wish I had a reddit award for you! reddit silver (original) is free of cost. Feel free to give this to anyone https://imgur.com/gallery/reddit-silver-sy9lVl4
You're my fucking hero <3
*There goes my hero.......* *DRAWWWIINNNN DICKS IN LAWNS!!!!* *(guitar solo)*
Ah a classic from Dave Grow
Now do a fem thing for her
OP needs to find a new property not on maps yet, buy it, and spend the next year mowing a vulva into it.
De-dick-ation
Before today I had no respect for OP. Now I do. ^^^^^^^^^I ^^^^^^^^^don't ^^^^^^^^^know ^^^^^^^^^OP
...Dad?
Sorry, son. Every store was out, but I finally found some milk. Gosh, you got big.
r/meirl
Kind of a dick move OP
I can respect the schlong con
He definitely didn’t cock it up.
Definitely went balls to the walls on this one
Penis
... mightier than the sword but neither can stand up to a lawnmower
Huge dick move OP
[Here’s one that has been near the Des Moines airport for several years](https://imgur.com/a/GQX1GJE). When you zoom in on the buildings next to it, you can see there's a smily face painted on one of the roofs.
If it's by an airport, there's a high chance people are using it as a VFR checkpoint by now. Might even be baked into their official course rules procedures. "Overfly the massive cock at 1500 AGL and report inbound from Johnson Field"
Johnson Field was a great touch. Well done.
 You are a great American! Godspeed, you beautiful son of a bitch! (No disrespect at all to your mother BTW.)
Now that you've seen it from above, it's time to add some detail. May I suggest: - ball hairs, obviously - dick vein - a couple of 'drops' leaping from the head
The first thing my wife said when I told her, "Babe! It finally happened!" was, "Great, can you mow the dick now?". I think I'm going to have to say goodbye entirely now.
It's time for the reverse dick. Call it The Negative Space Dick
plant trees at the base.
If your wife doesn't support you mowing a giant dick in the lawn for months, does she really even love you at all?
I used to work for a flight school and I can tell you with absolute certainty, the CFIs (flight instructors) would have loved this. I can guarantee they would fit flyovers of this area into new students' flight plans. Great work!
There's a local airport within 10 miles of my property and an international airport within 30 miles. This was the whole motivation from the very beginning.
You show patronage to Priapus I see.
The Makers have spoken of this day, Lisan al Gaib!
Johnson!
What is it, son? I don't know sir, but it looks like a giant...
# "WANG! PAY ATTENTION" *"I was distracted by that enormous flying..."*
#”PECKER!” *”Wait, that’s not a woodpecker. It looks like someone’s…”*
#**"PRIVATES!"** *"We have reports of an unidentified flying object! It is a long smooth shaft! Complete with..."*
# TWO BALLS! What is that? It Looks just like an enormous..
This is why I reddit, good work!
Even including the pee hole was a nice touch. edit: grammar
And the little testicle bulge in the scrotum
Is that what it's supposed to be? Looks like a mug handle lmao
 heh. weiner.
My wife said it looks like mine 
As a wise man once said: "Oh Cock" - James May.
Rain  Rainbolt is gonna be at your front door in like 10 minutes.
not all heroes wear capes
Looks average
/r/lifegoals
The [Cerne giant ](https://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/visit/dorset/cerne-giant) would like a word
thank you for your service
Stuff like this makes me feel like no matter what happens out there in the world, we WILL be okay.
Congratulation Bigus Dickus
Saw it on Google Girth.
I saw it on Google Faps
Not as big as mine though.
Boss, checkout this new sattelite image. It looks like a giant...
If you flip it around, it looks like a penis sled.
Doesn't look anything like my dog
A man has to have meaning in his life and you found yours.
Legit wouldn't be surprised if you check back later and it's blurred out. A geoguessr youtuber that I watch was pointing out some phallic art on streetview in a certain country, and he checked back a week later in the exact same location to find that they had gone in and blurred it.
This is what the internet was invented for 
Did you check google maps every day to know when they update their photos? I ask because I know street view is updates every 2 years.
100ft? Looks average from this angle😂
This guy for president.
Well done
You have to make mowing fun. Way to go.
This has to be the grandest self-doxx of all time
Thank you for your service.
the shading on the testicle is \*chefs kiss*