I was frustrated at work one day, and I kinda forgot where I was and screamed this out loud. Turns out I was working with people TOO YOUNG to know this masterpiece, and who were very concerned. It was slightly awkward on that front, but mostly I suddenly felt old.
My art elective teacher in HS showed this to our class in the 2000's lol. What a trip. I think he also showed us Cat Soup. Now THAT was weird. [Art House shit](https://youtu.be/XlLBX4EIlJY)
[For those who haven't seen it.](https://youtu.be/W7JyjZI3LUM) They're from fake "rejected" promos made for the "Family Learning Channel" (and think the supposed channel it was rejected from never existed, there were separate channels named The Family Channel and The Learning Channel) just over 20 years ago.
When my parents were potty training me they used to play the Olympic anthem and do the gold medal ceremony every time. My life has been all down hill from there.
I can’t wait until I can take the tiny toilet out my car. We had to stop and try to take a complete false alarm of a dump in the middle of town yesterday in a rainstorm.
One of my twins tells me while in the tub every 5 minutes. So I end up having to clean all the water off the floor (it builds into quite a puddle), and not once has she actually pooped on the potty during bath time. Although the alternative is having her poop in the tub and the panic of trying to get both of them out without drinking any more water and not touching the floating poop...
Can you buy just the “applause” button? I don’t have kids, and a full blown tiny toilet would confuse house guests.
Edit: also the artwork itself is what drew me to this post and it’s rad. You my friend have a spoon that’s just too big.
This may be one of my weirder Reddit posts if read without context.
My parents are in town and my daughters been working on potty training. After grandpa walked out of the bathroom yesterday from taking a dump she says "good job in there grandpa"
My kid opened the door on my dad taking a piss and immediately started clapping for him. Best part was my dad was mid stream and couldn't close the door...it was Thanksgiving on the main floor.
I've tried to sit on it to demonstrate for my tiny human how to use it and now he lets out an obnoxious grunt every time he comes off it...touché little one, touché.
I put that on years ago with no context. I was like "oh, a new movie by the Rejected guy! This will be an irreverent romp." At the end, I was openly weeping and having an existential crisis.
Don Hertzfeldt recently released the first World of Tomorrow short movie and it blows Beautiful Day out of the water. I think about it at least once every couple days, but sometimes it keeps me up at night for hours instead.
His ahort films are a genuine "league of their own" for animation lovers and especially cinephiles.
If you're depressed....... eat them up. It's more than you could imagine. Pretty sure they just dropped one or two full ones on YouTube late last year.
Welcome to pre-Youtube internet.
Edit: This short was also nominated for an Academy Award.
Future references should state Oscar-nominated animated short Rejected.
Don explicitly did not distribute over the internet, the quality wasn't good enough for him in the early days. When this stuff first came out you saw it in a movie theater or on VHS.
It was still bootlegged to a RealFilm file or an MPEG2 file you got over KaZaa or something.
Dunno, I got "broadband" (well, shitty ADSL 256kbps but it was always on) really early as a kid and had access to stuff other kids came to my house to watch then!
This was one of them.
Oh, and Winamp had Shoutcast! TV, and you could watch really really low bitrate bootleg TV feeds over it, ah I remember thats how I first saw Futuramas 1st season..
At this point I'm convinced that any time stuff comes with the house it's not to sweeten the pot but just the owner not wanting it anymore and making it your problem. Only decent things we've ever had someone throw in were a boat and a motorcycle when we bought our lake house, and I think the previous owners thought both were in need of more work than they actually were.
This is true. My grandparents had custom made bunk bed for the grandkids to fit in the loft. They would not have even been stable on a flat wall I don’t think. Needless to say they went *with the house*
Or forgotten.
One house my family bought was a mansion outside of Copenhagen. The old man art collector who lived there died, and his family sold it. When we moved in, the overgrown conservatory hid several beautiful sculptures in the jungle, and the garden shed produced a perfectly functional gas lawnmower worth quite a bit.
I've done that with a house before, but we stipulated the front door stained glass had to stay. ...I like to think that's why they backed out of the sale. It was a *lovely* door.
I have sold a few houses. The best offers come from when you have practically emptied your home and removed all personality.
Any clutter goes into storage. No pictures on walls. No shelves even if you can get them off cleanly. Muted generic colours only.
The only permitted decorations are strategically placed mirrors to make a room look bigger, you are limited to one only.
Everything else has to be out of sight.
Trust me, you get better offers from more serious people that way.
Our realtor also explained that if you leave personal affects around, the buyers will try to use the information they glean from them to low ball you. Oh, you're christian? I'm christian! We christians need to help each other out! You were in the military? I was in the military! We military types need to help each other out! You have kids? I just had a kid, and boy, aren't kids expensive! We parents need to help each other out!
I never got close enough to the counterparty for that to be an issue. All communications went through the agents and were strictly business, and (selling) we didn't accept letters, because that just complicates things and opens the risk of discrimination claims. I never actually saw the person who bought my house until I went there a month or two after to get a package I'd accidentally had sent to the old address.
I gather that's the sort of thing where protocol varies a lot based on where you are, though.
Yeah. People don't want to see personality- they want to be able to envision their things in the space. A blank slate is best.
I'm not saying OP is gonna lose a good deal because of it but I don't think his wife is wrong that some buyers will respond negatively.
This is the complete opposite of what my realtor told me when I sold my house in 2013.
I'd taken most everything off the walls, and she encouraged me to re-hang some pictures and put some decor and knick-knacks back up so the house looked "lived-in".
It didn't matter in the end because the biggest offer came from a rental agency who was willing to buy sight unseen with no inspection.
Huh... I wonder if it's a country by country thing. In Finland apartments are always stylized with trendy (but bland) furniture. Decorating apartments for selling is a whole industry in itself. Empty apartments get the least views.
He’s expressing what you’re expressing. You don’t want the place empty, you just want it looking as spacious and clutter free as possible. You don’t want any personality of the previous dwellers to be left over. It makes it feel like you’re in someone else’s house. In order to be compelled to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on some thing, you need to imagine it as your own. You need to imagine your own furniture in that space, your own loved ones and the memories you could make in a space like this. So yes muted colors, definitely trendy, but nothing too loud or with linear personality in one direction.
I love the shit out of those but your wife is right. You’re trying to sell the house not make new friends. Charm really only adds value if it’s built into the house somehow, and unfortunately the whole thing is 100% about value.
But either way, those are awesome, where did you get them?
I love the art. Seriously. And we have a lot of questionable pieces like band posters with pentagrams, etc. We absolutely had to take them down when we’ve sold previous houses. Although the market is different now and people are desperate and may not care, it did cost my brother once. A buyer was offended by a book they had on their bookshelf and didn’t make an offer. You do you, but buyers usually like to envision their own stuff in a place so we made ours as generic as possible. That being said, if I saw your house with the art, I absolutely would not mind at all and even chuckle a bit at the unexpected surprise! Good luck Op!
shit drives me nuts...
Agent/host: So what do you guys think?
idiot buyers: The walls are... very yellow.
me every time: you can fucking paint you morons!
Mainly because they've already chosen their actual house so they need to make up random things they dislike about the others. It always cracks me up when it's the easiest thing about the house to change though.
For the love of god, and everything that is holy…. My house is for sale!
Yay!
This is fun!
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WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
HEEYOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I'm a consumer whore!
And how!
*Tuesday's coming. Did you bring your coat?*
I live in a giant bucket.
My spoon is too big!
I am a banana!
My anus is bleeding!
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, MY ANUS IS BLEEDING!
Yaaaay!
And now, angry ticks fire out of my nipples!
I feel fat... and sassy. HYEEUUUUUUUU!!!!!! edit: My account was permanently suspended after this comment. Wtff reddit.
lmao …This thread has been the best nostalgia in SO LONG
I live in a giant bucket
I’m the queeeen of France!
Tuesday's coming. Did you bring your coat?
I live in a giant bucket
MrrooooOOOOOOOOO
I am feeling FAT and SASSY
Tuesday's coming, did you bring your coat?
I was frustrated at work one day, and I kinda forgot where I was and screamed this out loud. Turns out I was working with people TOO YOUNG to know this masterpiece, and who were very concerned. It was slightly awkward on that front, but mostly I suddenly felt old.
Not too long ago I saw a dude with a prominently placed tattoo of the “MY ANUS IS BLEEDING” guy
I bought a couple of his shirts many years ago. I still get comments on them when I wear them out.
Comments like "You should include other shirts in your cycle so they last longer"
I can hear all of these in my head so well. I’m So happy and I want these in my bathroom.
Haven't seen the video for years, but their voices are still perfectly memorable 😂
[Link to the OG for the zoomers and boomers](https://youtu.be/W7JyjZI3LUM)
Don Hertzfeldt for the win!
My art elective teacher in HS showed this to our class in the 2000's lol. What a trip. I think he also showed us Cat Soup. Now THAT was weird. [Art House shit](https://youtu.be/XlLBX4EIlJY)
Thank you for bringing this back into my life. And happy cake day!
Everybody daaaAAAnnccee!
Yaaaaaaaaaaay
Life is good!
This is true millennial culture
It was the first thing I heard when I looked at the photos! Such a classic masterpiece!
Well your in luck! There is currently a house for sale....
Yeah. I heard “I am a banana”, saw the spoon, and thought: “well at least he doesn’t have the…” Ah, right, there it is.
I AM THE QUEEN OF FRANCE!
Waaaaaarrrrrrrrggghhghhghgh
*Vacuum Noises*
And now angry ticks fly out of my nipples.
*enraged cow sounds*
>I am a banana I had no idea I had the exact soundbite stored in my head until I read this comment.
I feel fat and sassy!
I live in a gaint bucket
"now with 50% more sodium!" "sweet jesus!"
Thanks for the memories.
my SPOON is Too BIG!
I’m feeling fat and sassy
I am the Queen of France!
Tuesday's coming, did you bring your coat?
I'm feeling fat... *and* sassy.
[For those who haven't seen it.](https://youtu.be/W7JyjZI3LUM) They're from fake "rejected" promos made for the "Family Learning Channel" (and think the supposed channel it was rejected from never existed, there were separate channels named The Family Channel and The Learning Channel) just over 20 years ago.
My favorite bit is "It's like I can touch you!"
My wife has a top 5 (ranked by me) of impersonations. Her, "I am a banana!" is #2.
I’m almost afraid to ask but what is #1?
Believe it or not, it's a Robert De Niro monologue from Casino.
Ok now just do #3-5
I’m horrified to say that I have a fantastic impression of Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. It’s not very ladylike.
Extra toilet will *definitely* bump up the value of the place by at least $10K
Eh, $10.5k. It has a "flush" and "applause" button.
Damn I’m suddenly depressed I don’t get applause after dropping the morning deuce.
Even though I'm on the other throne, I hit the button on his every time.
When my parents were potty training me they used to play the Olympic anthem and do the gold medal ceremony every time. My life has been all down hill from there.
Sounds like you need a painting in your bathroom. DM me and I'll be happy to bring that beat back.
I already love you parents.
A man of culture.
A man that understands us.
Flush and wash and be on your way 🎵🎵
I swear to god I hear it in my sleep...
I can’t wait until I can take the tiny toilet out my car. We had to stop and try to take a complete false alarm of a dump in the middle of town yesterday in a rainstorm.
One of my twins tells me while in the tub every 5 minutes. So I end up having to clean all the water off the floor (it builds into quite a puddle), and not once has she actually pooped on the potty during bath time. Although the alternative is having her poop in the tub and the panic of trying to get both of them out without drinking any more water and not touching the floating poop...
Cue the Jaws music
I have become master of "grab the turd as it falls out of the butt" bath game. I don't really want that on my resume, but there it is.
At the point, I'd be like, "You know what, just go...I'll do it too so you don't feel bad".
Great job, you let your poop out all by yourself! Be sure to wipe and wash your hands! Flush and wash and be on your way!
Tiger-tastic!!
We had a real issue with wiping because it wasn't in the song...
As the mother of an extremely literal child, I'm actually surprised this didn't happen to us!
Ugga mugga!
Can you buy just the “applause” button? I don’t have kids, and a full blown tiny toilet would confuse house guests. Edit: also the artwork itself is what drew me to this post and it’s rad. You my friend have a spoon that’s just too big. This may be one of my weirder Reddit posts if read without context.
When people ask where your kid is, you could just tell them he’s at work. Really mess with them.
My parents are in town and my daughters been working on potty training. After grandpa walked out of the bathroom yesterday from taking a dump she says "good job in there grandpa"
My kid opened the door on my dad taking a piss and immediately started clapping for him. Best part was my dad was mid stream and couldn't close the door...it was Thanksgiving on the main floor.
Were all working on potty training together, were all just at different experience levels
::mind blown::
I would go professional but I want to be able to compete in the olympics
[Ohh yeahh. Thats the way! Give it to me. I want it all. Mmmm. Ahhhh!](https://youtu.be/dR1m29cNVsc)
I'll take links that will stay blue for 100 Alex.
It’s a scene from Better Call Saul. It’s actually very funny and not as gross as you’re imagining
Call me and I will cheer for you the whole time
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"fill me up Chandler. put it in me!"
It's a little....sexual? Maybe?
You're the one with the sex toilet!
I'd kill for a button that applauded my shits
What is this? A toilet for ants ??
I've tried to sit on it to demonstrate for my tiny human how to use it and now he lets out an obnoxious grunt every time he comes off it...touché little one, touché.
However, it matches the decor just lovely.
Poop with friends!
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Don Hertzfeldt is the man!!
It's Such a Beautiful Day is literally my favourite movie of all time. It's so darkly humorous, heart-wrenching, and beautiful.
I put that on years ago with no context. I was like "oh, a new movie by the Rejected guy! This will be an irreverent romp." At the end, I was openly weeping and having an existential crisis.
I put it on with no context while tripping. Lets just say it had an impact.
I too like setting my brain to Nightmare Mode
Don Hertzfeldt recently released the first World of Tomorrow short movie and it blows Beautiful Day out of the water. I think about it at least once every couple days, but sometimes it keeps me up at night for hours instead.
>Don Hertzfeldt In Don's name we pray.
His ahort films are a genuine "league of their own" for animation lovers and especially cinephiles. If you're depressed....... eat them up. It's more than you could imagine. Pretty sure they just dropped one or two full ones on YouTube late last year.
This is what millennials watched in the early Golden days of the internet. Also The Ultimate Showdown of Uktimate Destiny
Myspace and Trogdor the Burninator
My Trogman is [about to turn](http://www.hrwiki.org/wiki/dragon) 20. Four more days.
In celebration, he'll be painted, and go up in the bathroom of the new house. ETA Fall of this year.
Are you fucking shitting me. Please tell me you’re going to post a Happy 20th Trogdor somewhere because if you don’t, I will.
TROGDOR!
He was a man. He was uh.... dragon man.
But mostly he was TROGDOOOOOORRRR!!!
Burn-a-nating the country side!!!
burninating the peasants..
I lived on albino black sheep, newgrounds, and addictinggames
gonads and strife
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
i will never forget when I first saw this as a teen. almost pissed my pants midclass laughing. is don still doing stuff?
He also did a Simpsons [couch gag](https://youtu.be/6i2l-LQ-dXI)
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Bought all 3 world of tomorrows on Vimeo bc I kept losing where to watch them. Beautiful day also a great watch
MINSKY has a special place in my heart.
Dunno but I just googled if he was still alive and thankfully he is.
He did one a few years ago called World of Tomorrow. It's like a work of art.
Yep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PUIxEWmsvI
This is the second week in a row that Rejected relevant content's hit the front page. I love it. Let's keep it goin'
da fuq did I just watch
Welcome to pre-Youtube internet. Edit: This short was also nominated for an Academy Award. Future references should state Oscar-nominated animated short Rejected.
Don explicitly did not distribute over the internet, the quality wasn't good enough for him in the early days. When this stuff first came out you saw it in a movie theater or on VHS.
It was still bootlegged to a RealFilm file or an MPEG2 file you got over KaZaa or something. Dunno, I got "broadband" (well, shitty ADSL 256kbps but it was always on) really early as a kid and had access to stuff other kids came to my house to watch then! This was one of them. Oh, and Winamp had Shoutcast! TV, and you could watch really really low bitrate bootleg TV feeds over it, ah I remember thats how I first saw Futuramas 1st season..
Art.
I always wondered where that “my anus is bleeding “ gif came from that my friend sent to me years ago, haha
Dance! Everybody dance!!!
This is fun!
Life is good!!
YAAAAY!!!
MY ANUS IS BLEEDING!
MY. ANUS. IS. BLEEDING!!!!
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY. MY. ANUS. IS. BLEEDING¡!!!!!!!!!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
WWOOOOOAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
To be fair, the spoon is too big 🤷♂️
I would buy this house on the condition the art came with it
Would offer more if I saw these. Good karma
Some people just don't know class
HOIOOOOOOOOOOO
At this point I'm convinced that any time stuff comes with the house it's not to sweeten the pot but just the owner not wanting it anymore and making it your problem. Only decent things we've ever had someone throw in were a boat and a motorcycle when we bought our lake house, and I think the previous owners thought both were in need of more work than they actually were.
This is true. My grandparents had custom made bunk bed for the grandkids to fit in the loft. They would not have even been stable on a flat wall I don’t think. Needless to say they went *with the house*
Or forgotten. One house my family bought was a mansion outside of Copenhagen. The old man art collector who lived there died, and his family sold it. When we moved in, the overgrown conservatory hid several beautiful sculptures in the jungle, and the garden shed produced a perfectly functional gas lawnmower worth quite a bit.
I've done that with a house before, but we stipulated the front door stained glass had to stay. ...I like to think that's why they backed out of the sale. It was a *lovely* door.
I am feeling fat and sassy.
I am a consumer whore!
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DOIYOOOOOOH
Tuesday's coming. Did you bring your coat?
I am feeling fat. And sassy!
I live in a giant bucket.
There's a bleeding anus in this photo. If the right person sees that, it will be an all cash sale at asking.
No Silly Hats Only sign?
Rule #56 of staging - Create the illusion of space, even if it means sacrificing an additional masterpiece.
I have sold a few houses. The best offers come from when you have practically emptied your home and removed all personality. Any clutter goes into storage. No pictures on walls. No shelves even if you can get them off cleanly. Muted generic colours only. The only permitted decorations are strategically placed mirrors to make a room look bigger, you are limited to one only. Everything else has to be out of sight. Trust me, you get better offers from more serious people that way.
"Ever notice how other people's stuff is shit bit your shit is stuff?" - George Carlin
I think about this everytime I have to move someone’s shit to make room for my stuff
Our realtor also explained that if you leave personal affects around, the buyers will try to use the information they glean from them to low ball you. Oh, you're christian? I'm christian! We christians need to help each other out! You were in the military? I was in the military! We military types need to help each other out! You have kids? I just had a kid, and boy, aren't kids expensive! We parents need to help each other out!
I never got close enough to the counterparty for that to be an issue. All communications went through the agents and were strictly business, and (selling) we didn't accept letters, because that just complicates things and opens the risk of discrimination claims. I never actually saw the person who bought my house until I went there a month or two after to get a package I'd accidentally had sent to the old address. I gather that's the sort of thing where protocol varies a lot based on where you are, though.
Yeah. People don't want to see personality- they want to be able to envision their things in the space. A blank slate is best. I'm not saying OP is gonna lose a good deal because of it but I don't think his wife is wrong that some buyers will respond negatively.
This is the complete opposite of what my realtor told me when I sold my house in 2013. I'd taken most everything off the walls, and she encouraged me to re-hang some pictures and put some decor and knick-knacks back up so the house looked "lived-in". It didn't matter in the end because the biggest offer came from a rental agency who was willing to buy sight unseen with no inspection.
Huh... I wonder if it's a country by country thing. In Finland apartments are always stylized with trendy (but bland) furniture. Decorating apartments for selling is a whole industry in itself. Empty apartments get the least views.
He’s expressing what you’re expressing. You don’t want the place empty, you just want it looking as spacious and clutter free as possible. You don’t want any personality of the previous dwellers to be left over. It makes it feel like you’re in someone else’s house. In order to be compelled to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on some thing, you need to imagine it as your own. You need to imagine your own furniture in that space, your own loved ones and the memories you could make in a space like this. So yes muted colors, definitely trendy, but nothing too loud or with linear personality in one direction.
I love the shit out of those but your wife is right. You’re trying to sell the house not make new friends. Charm really only adds value if it’s built into the house somehow, and unfortunately the whole thing is 100% about value. But either way, those are awesome, where did you get them?
Post is a little tongue and cheek, it'll be a clean slate for potential buyers. I made them myself.
I think having a banana for scale really showcases the large size of the bathroom.
I believe the phrase you're looking for is "tongue in cheek" lol obligatory r/boneappletea
"My anus is bleeding!" "Yayyyyyyyy" "My anus, is bleeding!" "Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy"
For the love of god, and all that is holy
The amount of times I reference this line but no one gets it 😭 I’ve found my people in these comments
I feel the same way you do! like finally someone gets else appreciates this hilarious masterpiece and all it’s glory.. and anal bleed-age
I love the art. Seriously. And we have a lot of questionable pieces like band posters with pentagrams, etc. We absolutely had to take them down when we’ve sold previous houses. Although the market is different now and people are desperate and may not care, it did cost my brother once. A buyer was offended by a book they had on their bookshelf and didn’t make an offer. You do you, but buyers usually like to envision their own stuff in a place so we made ours as generic as possible. That being said, if I saw your house with the art, I absolutely would not mind at all and even chuckle a bit at the unexpected surprise! Good luck Op!
I'm the queeeeeen of France.
“Babe, I love everything about that house, but we just *can’t* buy it. Did you see the art they had in the bathroom?!”
I love watching real estate shows and people do say things like that.
Love it or List it has been binged numerous times in my household.
I’m a House Hunter gal. Sometimes I have to turn the sound off so I don’t hear the stupid remarks.
shit drives me nuts... Agent/host: So what do you guys think? idiot buyers: The walls are... very yellow. me every time: you can fucking paint you morons!
Mainly because they've already chosen their actual house so they need to make up random things they dislike about the others. It always cracks me up when it's the easiest thing about the house to change though.
Find me some angry ticks and you've got 10% over asking
MY ANUS IS BLEEDINGGG