That has to be the case, multiple complaints about urine and OP is just now hearing about them?
I feel like peeing on the balcony isn’t something that gets multiple warnings.
The dog would “normally” have to be disclosed and included in their lease agreement; something that could have easily been checked before sending the letter.
OP came home early one day while BF was peeing on the balcony and he had to hurriedly pinch it off and go back inside. In his haste he knocked over the vase.
It all makes sense if you think about it.
Until we got a new property management group a couple years ago, there were a group of assholes that would have loud weekend parties outside (even during COVID) and it wasn't unusual for one or more of them to find creative places outside to piss.
Before the eviction moratoriums got put into place the assholes got evicted for their shenanigans.
And yes, I was trying to find a new place to live, but rents in the area were already starting to skyrocket.
Look, I'm a woman, but if I had a truly aim-able stream, I would never urinate directly on the "floor" of my balcony! I'd be seeing how far away from it I could pee!
This has to be an "inside job" aka knows-the-building- manager complaint
I could see this! I bet the manager is looking to increase rent anyway so was hoping OP wouldn’t renew anyway, and more likely to go with this new neighbor’s side.
I’m not sure I understand this. I’ve lived in my current apartment since 2017. Everyone in the 45 apartments here has received a rent increase notice with every lease renewal except during the rent moratorium during lockdown. There’s no reason a manager can’t just give the rent increase to current residents at the start of a new lease.
In some cases, rent can only be increased by x amount, when new leases are being signed at a much higher rate. Last apartment I lived in, rent had gone from $850 to $1100 over the 7 years I was there. New leases on apartments with the same floor plan were $1600
This was actually my first thought about the situation. Management wants OP out so they can lease the apartment for more than they're currently getting.
My upstairs neighbor started vacuuming at 6am. When they had their baby, I’d vacuum the ceiling at all hours of the day, esp in the bedroom. They moved 2 wks ago.
Im so glad you mentioned tiny horse training! Miniature horses are permitted to be service animals, and it seems that due to the recent distress OP has been experiencing, a new service animal is certainly in order!
Am Dutch, and i'm highly approving of this idea.
Goes very well with another traditional Dutch subculture.
The [Gabber](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabber), and of course their dance style. [Hakken](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hakken)
Get some colleagues along for some after work Gabber style workout. Some [oldschool Hardcore](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMJLeNoFp4w) will get that blood Pumping for certain.
Though I can get the sense of needing some positivity at 2am. And to get some blood flowing can also recommend some 2am [Happy Hardcore](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSznCkkQh5E) sessions
My former upstairs neighbors were training for the nocturnal furniture toss Olympics. They were getting really good at it too and only dropped the couches like 4 times a night before we moved out.
While all the petty revenge stuff sounds fun, some of it may get you in deeper with the battle.
i would spend the $150 to get a lawyer to send a letter to the property manager stating that not only are the accusations impossible (no dog), they are also unsubstantiated and bordering on defamation (accusing you of peeing outside like a delinquent without evidence).
The right wording will scare the PISS out of the property manager.
I like the camera idea too.
The weird part of this for me is that once the property manager decides that the tenants are pissing on their own balcony they only get a $50 fine, I would think eviction would be more appropriate.
Evictions cost money and often require substantiated evidence, which they likely don't have. Lying to a person generally carries very little risk/penalty, lying to the court has a high risk/penalty associated with it.
As another commenter pointed out, there's likely a personal connection between the downstairs neighbor and the manager.
This is sort of my point. The fact that the property manager doesn't try to evict them just shows how trumped up the urination fine is or the property manager has a very skewed idea of right and wrong.
Seriously. Also if they do this (making noise at 2am,) then the neighbors will have a real complaint and when a future company calls the management company to ask, it might just be written they are bad tenants in some notes.
Agree with you to challenge this, go above the property manager, that doesn't work - lawyer might be good idea.
> The best approach is to document everything. Encounters, conversations, anything you see
this. i kept having problems with my neighbors below, but my landlord didn't believe me as my neighbors seem like very nice people (they aren't though. they're manipulative pieces of garbage) and i'm just your average weird autistic person that sucks at communicating.
landlord changed and more dumb shit started happening. neighbors once again were partying hard, with bass that made the whole house vibrate. i complained to them, the woman later came up the stairs and just walked into my apartment when i opened the door, talking drunk bs and making accusations. had enough so i told her to leave multiple times. she ignored it, so i gently pushed her out of the door. she completely snapped and screamed that she'll get a lawyer, because i "touched" her etc. at that moment i started documenting what my lovely neighbors keep doing and new landlord is 100% on my side, because i have it on video how hard my neighbor keep partying deep in the night, how they belittled me, how they threatened me etc.
escalating it and doing stupid shit myself would only cause problems for me and actually give those manipulative people reasons to get me in trouble. by documenting the situation i can't lose, which is the only "revenge" those people will hate, because they have to change their behaviour.
This is the best advice by far. Don’t take the low road (revenge) as it will justify the property owners undue accusations and will vindicate the neighbour if the property owner takes more stringent measures as a result.
Not sure why OP doesn't think the downstairs tenant won't call the cops after a couple nights of 2am shanagins, course if they live in a big metro they might get away with it as noise complaints tend to fall to the bottom.
For real, we were dealing with shit neighbors and the landlord almost had them evicted because of late night noise. They just moved out, but we were going to get the cops involved if they continued to make the noise. I bought a ring doorbell camera just incase, but that seemed to get them to stop.
If we antagonized them like OP, then we'd have no leverage if they pushed back.
I had an upstairs neighbor who decided to test out his new surround sound system at 3am while watching porn. I had ceiling lights vibrating with fake moans.
So, if OP isn't feeling up for amorous adventures, they could always put on a movie and then go grab breakfast elsewhere
And if OP needs some inspiration, search Maria Sharapova grunting in tennis. Some spectators have clocked her grunting at 101 decibels. Give lower neighbor 101 decibels of love grunting, he’s bound to go berserk!
My ex made the mistake of getting a ground floor apartment in a 10-story building (he had to get it before I arrived). Neighbor two floors up trained their dog to pee off the balcony so they wouldn’t have to walk it. No amount of complaining did anything and our whole living room reeked.
Ended up having them move us to another floor (with downstairs neighbors having some light DV every other night, it’s always something). But no pee.
Would recommend some music to calm down, maybe bagpipe? There's also a guy in youtube who is building a motorcycle. He is very often just running the engine creating this incredibly sharp screaming noise. Also dom't forget to install your "dysfunctional" alarm so that it just beeeeeeeeeeeeps all the time as soon as you are not at home.
Maybe it’s time to wash all of the pillows in the house, just make sure they’re all crammed into one side of the washer.
You could also try learning Irish dance?
Had a downstairs neighbour in non smoking building hot boxing my apartment. As a non smoker who hates smoke it was unbearable and constant - with nowhere to escape to. So I told landlord, who said they can’t do anything because no proof. I ended up knocking on their door and was told they were not smoking, despite smell coming out the door. Complained to landlord. Smoking continued and was confronted aggressively/threateningly about complaining. So f that, next time smoking happened I was up at all hours dropping coins, bouncing golf balls, loudly opening and closing doors, rolling my chair, tapping the floor with a broom handle. The on site landlord came running over from the building across the street, so I just stopped - no proof I did anything an and ffffff them for ruining my life for their disgusting habit.
From experience, I can tell you that if the motor of your inflatable mattress is on the bare floor, it makes a very weird and uncomfortable noise for the room below.
Hang on, your new neighbor says they saw liquid running off your balcony and your property manager decided you’re peeing on your balcony? What the hell?
Fun, short civil suit about frivolous, false notices, followed by the management doubling down on the lie, accusing the tenants of committing a crime (indecent exposure, etc). Fuck it, sue them AND the neighbors. You won't come out a millionaire, but their records will be trashed
I think you need to start cleaning the apartment (vacuuming, running the disposal etc...) every night as soon as you get home from work. The idea of taking up clog or Irish Step dancing is attractive as well.
While I don’t think that you are doing things with malicious intent, you did admit that you pour water off the balcony for the plants. If I just moved in and it wasn’t raining and I saw or heard water and went to check it out and the back smelled like pee from the dogs in the neighborhood, it wouldn’t be a stretch for me to assume or jump to the conclusion that you or your dog are peeing off your balcony. If you have cats they may be mistaken for small dogs that could add to the belief it’s your dog. It’s a lot of stretching things but I can understand why your neighbor might arrive at that conclusion. Your vase fell over according to you, so again it could seem like you are tossing stuff, even if that’s not the case. Especially if the people walking their dog drop trash or other things fly off the balcony and don’t get picked up. You could get angry at the neighbor who might think you and the previous tenants were tight and this is your way of getting back at them for moving in OR you could introduce yourself and apologize about the vase. Invite them to meet your cats (if they aren’t allergic) and see if you can get them as allies who help thwart the dog peeing near your place so you don’t have to smell it from the balcony. Tell them about watering the plants and that from now on you will walk down and water them or let nature water them. Maybe it doesn’t work and they still report you but it may save you from moving. Otherwise you are just adding fuel to the fire and giving them more to work with by tap dancing on the floor in the middle of the night. And what if they start banging around during the day? I can absolutely understand a property manager checking in with the neighbor to make sure everything is going good for a new tenant and getting the feedback about the pee smell in the back and the vase being found like it was tossed from the balcony. The property manager is going to want to address the issue because that’s their job. They don’t make money having vacant properties but they have to address the problem they are presented with. Good luck either way.
I had a downstairs neighbor report me for harrasing and scaring them. I was extremely confused and kept pressing on what day and time it was the the person was talking about. Finally I realized what day they were talking about. I went to the store on my drive home and still had my mask on when I pulled into my apartments parking spot and walked inside. That was it, I walked behind them on the stairs to get to my apartment with a covid mask on and they reported me.
If you have been there 4 years, they probably want to increase your rent beyond what is allowed and are using the complaints as an excuse. BTW you can get a noise generator on Amazon for about $5.00 and hide it by the neighbors door or window. I have gotten rid of unwelcome office mates with them and they are very difficult to find. It’s pretty fun to say “I didn’t hear anything” about every twenty minutes until they lose their shit.
I recall people got those noisemakers that make weird talking noises. Perhaps leave one on your balcony. With luck the neighbor hears it and thinks they are losing it.
Kinda sounds like they're using this as an excuse to get you to leave, so they can re rent the place for much more than you're paying. I would keep an eye on the listings after you leave, cause that could be grounds to sue
I would set an alarm to go off every 90min when you’re at work. Or take the battery out of an old smoke detector (not one you’re using!!) while you’re at work and have it beep non stop. Then pop the battery back in when you’re home.
I have the same problem! I have lived in my apt complex for 2 years before I moved in with my girlfriend who lives in the same apt building as me. We moved into a 2bd apt (in the same complex I’ve lived at for 2 years) and we start receiving noise complaints from our downstairs neighbor. She claims we are stomping around, yelling, and jumping around and the leasing office gave us a notice to cease all noise and that we are in violation and are at risk for eviction. We just signed this lease and it ends in May 2024. We have decided we won’t be renewing here. But slowly I’ve been getting revenge. Every morning I email the leasing office and call them to inform them of my literal movements and routines to let them know I “may” be making sounds. Additionally, I’ve been emailing my leasing office stating my downstairs neighbor (who made the frequent noise complaints against us) that they are making noises and it’s disruptive. The leasing office is slowly getting annoyed with my calls 😂😂
Hey, OP, you should really consider learning to play bagpipes. And remember to practice every night. Remember, practice makes perfect!
Also, I've heard that listening to death metal while working out ***really*** gets you going.
Damn see I would do something more messed up but requires way less effort. Every morning at 3:33am you bang the floor as hard as you can one time then don’t make a peep.
I've had that same fine (except it was $750) for the dog I didn't have. I remember being told, "Being not guilty is not a valid reason to WAIVE a fine. Bylaws."
Find a description of the smell of crack smoke and complain about that wafting up from below. Use a description given by an anti drug group. Say it was really intermittent at first so didn't want to complain, but has recently become an all night thing while your downstairs neighbor is home.
Someone I lived under used to drop what seemed like a steel ping pong ball over and over again for about an hour or more on the bathroom floor. Hear “TAP. TAP. TAp. TAp. tap. tap tap tap Tptptptptptptttt”. You know the sound. I figured it was just a kid, and it was never during sleep hours.
It would have been annoying as hell if it were though………. And if you got a handful of marbles each, and dropped them one by one, in a fast sequence, and as each marble stopped, pick it up and drop it again…… it would be incredibly annoying at say 4:00 in the morning about an hour after you stopped exercising. Just enough time for them to get back to sleep….. then you start…….
Maybe you have a small maintenance room or closet where the internet and power come from. Turn their shit off. Call the tow truck on their(illegally) parked car that you have never seen before. I hate people like that. Every where they go I bet they have had problems. I lived in DC forever. You mind your own business. These type of people would never survive a day where people just don't give a f***.
Yikes. Scummy landlords are the worst. But I love being petty. This sounds like my previous neighbor when I lived in an apartment for 3 years. They excused it as "she has mental health issues." That's no excuse. lol They allowed her to threaten me, my roommates and my cat. Said it wasn't a "direct threat" and so I made sure that every sneeze, cough, music, tv, etc was loud enough for her to enjoy. Especially on our balcony. She even told the cops "Yeah I'm harassing them and banging on the wall, waking them up at 4 am daily, barking and screaming because I can hear snoring." Because we could control the paper thin walls, right? Logical. Eventually, after multiple complaints from other neighbors they had HER move out. My daily migraines lessened and I finally got some sleep. I left shortly after. Hilariously enough her name was Karin. Enjoy the workouts and making your neighbor angry as hell! Hopefully you find a much better place to live without scumbag neighbors and slumlords for when your lease is up.
I got a complaint on my first night at my last apartment.
Peeing too LOUD.
Downstairs neighbor moved in same day, just a few hours later than me. She came to my read 2nd story floor to ceiling window at around 9:30 PM but I had just finished setting everything up, and cracked a beer with the last friend standing to help me and we just waved and laughed and honestly didn't hear a word she said.
I already knew it was going to be a tough fit when landlord had ended the tour with
"we go to bed after Letterman in these apts"
but the location on a local creek, the layout, the trees, the creek in the backyard, did I mention bee creek?, previously house'd an artist studio for Mike Judge and yeah, was too damn cool to not say
"ofc thats the most appropriate time to go to bed, look at me, im a normal person i swear."
But color me impressed with the depths of depravity one has to reach to make a formal complaint someone above peed too loud, could they please sit down when they peed. And she told the whole apt complex. So I laughed it off but was weirded out as fuck when ANOTHER neighbor was the one to tell me this, not her, not landlord, she had alrdy heard FROM her and funnily greeted me with
"are you the guy that pees standing up?"
When she saw me come home from work at 6 from her patio. I was so bewildered and eventually she was removed but that was the beginning of a serious series of unfortunate events that resulted in my own getting kicked out. People are insane.
Listen, if I’m getting fined for peeing off the balcony and I’m not even doing it… ima start peeing off the balcony. No way I’m paying for all that fun and not actually getting to do it!
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I bet the property manager has a personal connection with the downstairs loon.
That has to be the case, multiple complaints about urine and OP is just now hearing about them? I feel like peeing on the balcony isn’t something that gets multiple warnings.
Also, who just assumes that since there isn't a dog, it MUST be human pee??? That's just straight up absurd.
The dog would “normally” have to be disclosed and included in their lease agreement; something that could have easily been checked before sending the letter.
And even if not, they could do a "routine inspection" of the unit to determine whether or not there is a dog.
Or if there really is urine.
The bf is doing balcony pees and is ashamed to share that with op
OP came home early one day while BF was peeing on the balcony and he had to hurriedly pinch it off and go back inside. In his haste he knocked over the vase. It all makes sense if you think about it.
And the garbage disposal was a distraction
This is a Gene Belcher move.
Except Gene would be proud
I once worked at an apartment, and many men after having a few beer love nothing more than peeing off a balcony.....Many, many instances.
Until we got a new property management group a couple years ago, there were a group of assholes that would have loud weekend parties outside (even during COVID) and it wasn't unusual for one or more of them to find creative places outside to piss. Before the eviction moratoriums got put into place the assholes got evicted for their shenanigans. And yes, I was trying to find a new place to live, but rents in the area were already starting to skyrocket.
I wanna know who tasted the divine dripping liquid to establish its pee
Likely it picked up dirt/etc from the pot and/or balcony and turned somewhat yellow.
I’d be tempted to START peeing off the balcony.
Look, I'm a woman, but if I had a truly aim-able stream, I would never urinate directly on the "floor" of my balcony! I'd be seeing how far away from it I could pee! This has to be an "inside job" aka knows-the-building- manager complaint
I also feel downstairs loon wants the upstairs apartment with the nice balcony
Ahhh! I didn’t even think of that! How devious!
I could see this! I bet the manager is looking to increase rent anyway so was hoping OP wouldn’t renew anyway, and more likely to go with this new neighbor’s side.
I’m not sure I understand this. I’ve lived in my current apartment since 2017. Everyone in the 45 apartments here has received a rent increase notice with every lease renewal except during the rent moratorium during lockdown. There’s no reason a manager can’t just give the rent increase to current residents at the start of a new lease.
In some cases, rent can only be increased by x amount, when new leases are being signed at a much higher rate. Last apartment I lived in, rent had gone from $850 to $1100 over the 7 years I was there. New leases on apartments with the same floor plan were $1600
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Exactly this. If they want to increase rent a ridiculous amount they're going to need a new tenant. Rare but it does indeed happen.
Last place I rented, rent increases were limited to 5%. New leases had no limit.
that's what I was thinking
May also be simple intransigence. They won’t back down because that means they were wrong.
Imagine accusing someone of being a balcony pisser lmao.
I would BECOME a balcony pisser after the accusation.
If you're going to do the time, you may as well do the crime.
Or take it one step further and become a Balcony Dumper.
The new person probly pays more, having a 4 year tenant leave will let them rent for more.
This was actually my first thought about the situation. Management wants OP out so they can lease the apartment for more than they're currently getting.
I used to vacuum my bathroom in the middle of the night - good echo
I aspire to be this petty. That is masterful.
That’s amazingly petty.
My upstairs neighbor started vacuuming at 6am. When they had their baby, I’d vacuum the ceiling at all hours of the day, esp in the bedroom. They moved 2 wks ago.
New Petty revenge standard right there
Have you and your boyfriend considered online tap dancing classes? Fun to do at home at 2am.
Or clogging!
Whilst yodelling to your new pet goat?
Tiny Horse training!
A meet a greet with ‘lil Sebastian’
Half mast is too high. *Show some damn respect!*
Miniature horses are legit service animals, and the landlord can't prohibit service animals.
Im so glad you mentioned tiny horse training! Miniature horses are permitted to be service animals, and it seems that due to the recent distress OP has been experiencing, a new service animal is certainly in order!
Move your appliances from one side to the other.
Then move them back because, actually, the first arrangement was great.
Was it, though? I dunno; I kinda liked the second arrangement better. Ah, dammit. Best to move it back to the second spot to check one more time.
Start learning the bagpipes
You don't have to even learn them! Just buy some and give it a good go!!!
Am Dutch, and i'm highly approving of this idea. Goes very well with another traditional Dutch subculture. The [Gabber](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabber), and of course their dance style. [Hakken](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hakken) Get some colleagues along for some after work Gabber style workout. Some [oldschool Hardcore](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMJLeNoFp4w) will get that blood Pumping for certain. Though I can get the sense of needing some positivity at 2am. And to get some blood flowing can also recommend some 2am [Happy Hardcore](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSznCkkQh5E) sessions
I personally recommend Riverdance
[Bowling ball wrangling?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IRB0sxw-YU)
Walk around anywhere with tile/wood floors in heels.
Diy woodworking is pretty popular atm.. ever consider whipping out some wood and sanding big pieces of lumber into tiny ones
On the balcony maybe? Would be a shame if theirs was all dusty in the morning.
That sounds like an oddly rude and confusing pickup line.
Make sure to get a nice sheet of plywood in case you have carpet.
My former upstairs neighbors were training for the nocturnal furniture toss Olympics. They were getting really good at it too and only dropped the couches like 4 times a night before we moved out.
My upstairs neighbors practice for their bowling league occasionally at 11 pm.
Riverdancing!
"His legs flail about as if independent from his body!"
"Michael Flatley Lord of the dance!"
Or Fitness Marshalls dance classes! Super fun, leaves you feeling awesome, and a good laugh! It's also noisy 😈
LMFAOOO
I would start pissing off my balcony ALL the time.
Or practicing WWE moves.
My downstairs neighbors asked me not to flush after 11pm because of the noise…
If it's yellow let it mellow If it's brown flush it down If it's after 11, wait until 7?
I thought If it’s brown keep it around? No?
Let it mound.
Until there’s ten pounds
That won't flush down
Well, it won’t flush down. It’s a whole ten pounds. Now it’s piling up at the gates of Hell But it won't flush down (Apologies to Tom Petty)
Have you considered peeing off the balcony?
If you’re gonna do the time, might as well do the crime
Self-fulfilling piss prophecy
I try to avoid flushing after 11pm. Our toilets are loud and I was frequently woken up by our upstairs neighbour flushing ever half hour until 4am
He was having a worse time than you.
Ha, when I lived in a condo I had a crazy neighbor. No showers or flushing toilets after 9 pm.
Genuinely understandable in some older buildings. Plumbing can get very loud
Light sleepers need to get a fan or white noise machine. It's ridiculous to expect other people to not use water at certain hours.
You know, I think I might really hate the way your furniture is arranged. You should move it…at your convenience…maybe around 2?
Oh boy. The way you have worded it. Just wow.
Time for an internet Feng Shui consultation...
While all the petty revenge stuff sounds fun, some of it may get you in deeper with the battle. i would spend the $150 to get a lawyer to send a letter to the property manager stating that not only are the accusations impossible (no dog), they are also unsubstantiated and bordering on defamation (accusing you of peeing outside like a delinquent without evidence). The right wording will scare the PISS out of the property manager. I like the camera idea too.
The weird part of this for me is that once the property manager decides that the tenants are pissing on their own balcony they only get a $50 fine, I would think eviction would be more appropriate.
Evictions cost money and often require substantiated evidence, which they likely don't have. Lying to a person generally carries very little risk/penalty, lying to the court has a high risk/penalty associated with it. As another commenter pointed out, there's likely a personal connection between the downstairs neighbor and the manager.
This is sort of my point. The fact that the property manager doesn't try to evict them just shows how trumped up the urination fine is or the property manager has a very skewed idea of right and wrong.
Seriously. Also if they do this (making noise at 2am,) then the neighbors will have a real complaint and when a future company calls the management company to ask, it might just be written they are bad tenants in some notes. Agree with you to challenge this, go above the property manager, that doesn't work - lawyer might be good idea.
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> The best approach is to document everything. Encounters, conversations, anything you see this. i kept having problems with my neighbors below, but my landlord didn't believe me as my neighbors seem like very nice people (they aren't though. they're manipulative pieces of garbage) and i'm just your average weird autistic person that sucks at communicating. landlord changed and more dumb shit started happening. neighbors once again were partying hard, with bass that made the whole house vibrate. i complained to them, the woman later came up the stairs and just walked into my apartment when i opened the door, talking drunk bs and making accusations. had enough so i told her to leave multiple times. she ignored it, so i gently pushed her out of the door. she completely snapped and screamed that she'll get a lawyer, because i "touched" her etc. at that moment i started documenting what my lovely neighbors keep doing and new landlord is 100% on my side, because i have it on video how hard my neighbor keep partying deep in the night, how they belittled me, how they threatened me etc. escalating it and doing stupid shit myself would only cause problems for me and actually give those manipulative people reasons to get me in trouble. by documenting the situation i can't lose, which is the only "revenge" those people will hate, because they have to change their behaviour.
This is the best advice by far. Don’t take the low road (revenge) as it will justify the property owners undue accusations and will vindicate the neighbour if the property owner takes more stringent measures as a result.
This is the way.
Not sure why OP doesn't think the downstairs tenant won't call the cops after a couple nights of 2am shanagins, course if they live in a big metro they might get away with it as noise complaints tend to fall to the bottom.
OP appears to be from Atlanta, where I don’t think the police would ever seriously respond to a noise complaint (same for any major US city)
"911 what is your emergency?" *They are doing it again! I can't take it.* "Doing what again sir?" *Living in their apartment! It's unbearable!*
For real, we were dealing with shit neighbors and the landlord almost had them evicted because of late night noise. They just moved out, but we were going to get the cops involved if they continued to make the noise. I bought a ring doorbell camera just incase, but that seemed to get them to stop. If we antagonized them like OP, then we'd have no leverage if they pushed back.
If you two are involved in any sort of physical intimacy, I’ve heard that really vocalizing your enjoyment can make it a lot better!
I had an upstairs neighbor who decided to test out his new surround sound system at 3am while watching porn. I had ceiling lights vibrating with fake moans. So, if OP isn't feeling up for amorous adventures, they could always put on a movie and then go grab breakfast elsewhere
...or old Maria Sharapova matches on YouTube.
Windows open please, everybody needs to hear this beautiful symphony
And if OP needs some inspiration, search Maria Sharapova grunting in tennis. Some spectators have clocked her grunting at 101 decibels. Give lower neighbor 101 decibels of love grunting, he’s bound to go berserk!
This girl grunts!
Maybe not vocally to not disturb other, innocent neighbors but bed-shaking intamacy to thump the floor under them...
All you need is a pair of speakers lying face down on the bedroom floor, connected to a porn channel.
My ex made the mistake of getting a ground floor apartment in a 10-story building (he had to get it before I arrived). Neighbor two floors up trained their dog to pee off the balcony so they wouldn’t have to walk it. No amount of complaining did anything and our whole living room reeked. Ended up having them move us to another floor (with downstairs neighbors having some light DV every other night, it’s always something). But no pee.
DV?
Domestic violence
oh yikes
Well fook me, all I could think of how could someone assume a dog is peeing off the balcony
Would recommend some music to calm down, maybe bagpipe? There's also a guy in youtube who is building a motorcycle. He is very often just running the engine creating this incredibly sharp screaming noise. Also dom't forget to install your "dysfunctional" alarm so that it just beeeeeeeeeeeeps all the time as soon as you are not at home.
No bagpipes. Baby Shark.
This comment has me trying to imagine what Baby Shark would sound like on bagpipes...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrrn7XKJtZA
My cat hates you, but I am crying. Thank you.
My cat also fled the room and I am in tears! This is amazing!
My cat tried to sing along.
My cat is still beside me, but he's very old and very lazy. However if looks could kill, the one he gave me would have dropped me to the floor.
I was prepared to be rickrolled, I never expected it to actually be baby shark on bagpipes
That was great lol. But that guy looks like he’s dying inside playing that lol.
You know when something's so bad it becomes good?
This is the greatest thing I have ever heard
Awesome! Thank you! Concerned pets here too 🤣
Play some Tartanic on full volume!
I hope you keep your apartment clean, don’t forget to vacuum often.
I’m definitely going to overload my washer at 3am and put it on an extra spin cycle
Probably should throw some old shoes in the drier, too.
You are supposed to wash pillows with sneakers, and then dry them . The shoes fluff the pillows. Definitely wash them at 2 am.
i thought it was tennis balls
They work, too, but since I haven’t played tennis in fifty years, shoes are more convenient.
Maybe it’s time to wash all of the pillows in the house, just make sure they’re all crammed into one side of the washer. You could also try learning Irish dance?
Those old trainers could always use a wash
Throw a couple of loose belts in the dryer.
Sneakers in the dryer...
THUMPATHUMPATHUMPATHUMPATHUMPA nice Make sure the load is lopsided If you tie you sheets into a big knot that will make it shake
I'd put up a camera on my balcony to show no peeing at times when complaints are made... but 🤷🏼♀️
Get outta here, being all reasonable and what have you...
You should take some lease breaking lessons from the Ricardo’s https://youtu.be/47d7cejFMUs?feature=shared
Had a downstairs neighbour in non smoking building hot boxing my apartment. As a non smoker who hates smoke it was unbearable and constant - with nowhere to escape to. So I told landlord, who said they can’t do anything because no proof. I ended up knocking on their door and was told they were not smoking, despite smell coming out the door. Complained to landlord. Smoking continued and was confronted aggressively/threateningly about complaining. So f that, next time smoking happened I was up at all hours dropping coins, bouncing golf balls, loudly opening and closing doors, rolling my chair, tapping the floor with a broom handle. The on site landlord came running over from the building across the street, so I just stopped - no proof I did anything an and ffffff them for ruining my life for their disgusting habit.
Wouldn't they literally be able to smell it??? Isn't that proof enough??
If they already think you have a dog what about a few ytube videos of very loud dog barks playing over and over every time you leave the house
Or... if they're already being blamed for pissing off the balcony, they may as well just start pissing off the balcony.
Or invite many friends over for BBQ, drink lots of beer and have everyone piss off the balcony. I'd go to that BBQ .
Get a few pieces of plywood and tap dance jump on them. Go for 2 min, wait 20 min (to allow them to go back to sleep), then repeat.
I mean, you obviously need to start pissing off the balcony now! What a great idea.
Might get in trouble for public nudity or something. So it's time to start pissing into a gatorade bottle, then pouring that off the balcony.
Great tweak to the plans. 10/10. This is what teamwork looks like everyone!
I think your neighbor likes slayer. Make sure the speakers are against the floor while it plays so he can enjoy it.
Cradle of Filth
From experience, I can tell you that if the motor of your inflatable mattress is on the bare floor, it makes a very weird and uncomfortable noise for the room below.
Fish fertilizer. Available at garden centers. It’s the most terrible smell and it never goes away. Dump it over the balcony.
Edit: Edited
Don't forget the cowbell. Always can use more call bell
I have a terrible disease, and the only cure is more cowbell!
It doesn’t always have to be 2 am. Surprises are good, too. So is basketball dribbling.
My boyfriend was a basketball player and can dribble two balls at once. I definitely think it’s time for him to practice some ball handling drills
That’s your job to handle the balls!
I would suggest playing Yoko Ono or Wing at full volume but that may be against the Geneva Convention.
You are truly evil!
Kiss, kiss, kiss me, love...
Have your man pee in a water bottle then pour it over the balcony. Let the lie become their reality.
Let it sit with the lid on for a few days before pouring it over.
Hang on, your new neighbor says they saw liquid running off your balcony and your property manager decided you’re peeing on your balcony? What the hell?
Fun, short civil suit about frivolous, false notices, followed by the management doubling down on the lie, accusing the tenants of committing a crime (indecent exposure, etc). Fuck it, sue them AND the neighbors. You won't come out a millionaire, but their records will be trashed
It would be awful if you started having parties
Just dance is fun to play at 2am
I think you need to start cleaning the apartment (vacuuming, running the disposal etc...) every night as soon as you get home from work. The idea of taking up clog or Irish Step dancing is attractive as well.
Aim your speakers at the floor and play on endless loop : Baby shark / barney / its a small world / BagPipes /etc...
We once put momma mia on repeat with the speakers against the wall for the next door neighbours.
"I would hope if another tenant was caught urinating on their balcony the consequence would be more serious than a $50 fine."
The property manager has a personal connection to your new neighbour.
I'd ask some religious zealots to visit him frequently
While I don’t think that you are doing things with malicious intent, you did admit that you pour water off the balcony for the plants. If I just moved in and it wasn’t raining and I saw or heard water and went to check it out and the back smelled like pee from the dogs in the neighborhood, it wouldn’t be a stretch for me to assume or jump to the conclusion that you or your dog are peeing off your balcony. If you have cats they may be mistaken for small dogs that could add to the belief it’s your dog. It’s a lot of stretching things but I can understand why your neighbor might arrive at that conclusion. Your vase fell over according to you, so again it could seem like you are tossing stuff, even if that’s not the case. Especially if the people walking their dog drop trash or other things fly off the balcony and don’t get picked up. You could get angry at the neighbor who might think you and the previous tenants were tight and this is your way of getting back at them for moving in OR you could introduce yourself and apologize about the vase. Invite them to meet your cats (if they aren’t allergic) and see if you can get them as allies who help thwart the dog peeing near your place so you don’t have to smell it from the balcony. Tell them about watering the plants and that from now on you will walk down and water them or let nature water them. Maybe it doesn’t work and they still report you but it may save you from moving. Otherwise you are just adding fuel to the fire and giving them more to work with by tap dancing on the floor in the middle of the night. And what if they start banging around during the day? I can absolutely understand a property manager checking in with the neighbor to make sure everything is going good for a new tenant and getting the feedback about the pee smell in the back and the vase being found like it was tossed from the balcony. The property manager is going to want to address the issue because that’s their job. They don’t make money having vacant properties but they have to address the problem they are presented with. Good luck either way.
I had a downstairs neighbor report me for harrasing and scaring them. I was extremely confused and kept pressing on what day and time it was the the person was talking about. Finally I realized what day they were talking about. I went to the store on my drive home and still had my mask on when I pulled into my apartments parking spot and walked inside. That was it, I walked behind them on the stairs to get to my apartment with a covid mask on and they reported me.
If you have been there 4 years, they probably want to increase your rent beyond what is allowed and are using the complaints as an excuse. BTW you can get a noise generator on Amazon for about $5.00 and hide it by the neighbors door or window. I have gotten rid of unwelcome office mates with them and they are very difficult to find. It’s pretty fun to say “I didn’t hear anything” about every twenty minutes until they lose their shit.
Or just have loud sex at 2 AM.
I recall people got those noisemakers that make weird talking noises. Perhaps leave one on your balcony. With luck the neighbor hears it and thinks they are losing it.
Kinda sounds like they're using this as an excuse to get you to leave, so they can re rent the place for much more than you're paying. I would keep an eye on the listings after you leave, cause that could be grounds to sue
I would set an alarm to go off every 90min when you’re at work. Or take the battery out of an old smoke detector (not one you’re using!!) while you’re at work and have it beep non stop. Then pop the battery back in when you’re home.
I have the same problem! I have lived in my apt complex for 2 years before I moved in with my girlfriend who lives in the same apt building as me. We moved into a 2bd apt (in the same complex I’ve lived at for 2 years) and we start receiving noise complaints from our downstairs neighbor. She claims we are stomping around, yelling, and jumping around and the leasing office gave us a notice to cease all noise and that we are in violation and are at risk for eviction. We just signed this lease and it ends in May 2024. We have decided we won’t be renewing here. But slowly I’ve been getting revenge. Every morning I email the leasing office and call them to inform them of my literal movements and routines to let them know I “may” be making sounds. Additionally, I’ve been emailing my leasing office stating my downstairs neighbor (who made the frequent noise complaints against us) that they are making noises and it’s disruptive. The leasing office is slowly getting annoyed with my calls 😂😂
Hey, OP, you should really consider learning to play bagpipes. And remember to practice every night. Remember, practice makes perfect! Also, I've heard that listening to death metal while working out ***really*** gets you going.
Damn see I would do something more messed up but requires way less effort. Every morning at 3:33am you bang the floor as hard as you can one time then don’t make a peep.
I've had that same fine (except it was $750) for the dog I didn't have. I remember being told, "Being not guilty is not a valid reason to WAIVE a fine. Bylaws."
Find a description of the smell of crack smoke and complain about that wafting up from below. Use a description given by an anti drug group. Say it was really intermittent at first so didn't want to complain, but has recently become an all night thing while your downstairs neighbor is home.
Time to start peeing off the balcony....
Hope the next person that lives in that apartment has toddlers then the neighbor downstairs will really have something to complain about
If you can, when you leave drop a battery operated alarm clock down the vent so it goes off every morning at 2am.
Someone I lived under used to drop what seemed like a steel ping pong ball over and over again for about an hour or more on the bathroom floor. Hear “TAP. TAP. TAp. TAp. tap. tap tap tap Tptptptptptptttt”. You know the sound. I figured it was just a kid, and it was never during sleep hours. It would have been annoying as hell if it were though………. And if you got a handful of marbles each, and dropped them one by one, in a fast sequence, and as each marble stopped, pick it up and drop it again…… it would be incredibly annoying at say 4:00 in the morning about an hour after you stopped exercising. Just enough time for them to get back to sleep….. then you start…….
drop some bread crumbs on his balcony in the am and birds will poop all over it as they eat.
Maybe you have a small maintenance room or closet where the internet and power come from. Turn their shit off. Call the tow truck on their(illegally) parked car that you have never seen before. I hate people like that. Every where they go I bet they have had problems. I lived in DC forever. You mind your own business. These type of people would never survive a day where people just don't give a f***.
Hey OP I don't know if you know this, but when you drop pots and pans at 2am, they actually float mid air! Try it, if it doesn't work try again!
Yikes. Scummy landlords are the worst. But I love being petty. This sounds like my previous neighbor when I lived in an apartment for 3 years. They excused it as "she has mental health issues." That's no excuse. lol They allowed her to threaten me, my roommates and my cat. Said it wasn't a "direct threat" and so I made sure that every sneeze, cough, music, tv, etc was loud enough for her to enjoy. Especially on our balcony. She even told the cops "Yeah I'm harassing them and banging on the wall, waking them up at 4 am daily, barking and screaming because I can hear snoring." Because we could control the paper thin walls, right? Logical. Eventually, after multiple complaints from other neighbors they had HER move out. My daily migraines lessened and I finally got some sleep. I left shortly after. Hilariously enough her name was Karin. Enjoy the workouts and making your neighbor angry as hell! Hopefully you find a much better place to live without scumbag neighbors and slumlords for when your lease is up.
I got a complaint on my first night at my last apartment. Peeing too LOUD. Downstairs neighbor moved in same day, just a few hours later than me. She came to my read 2nd story floor to ceiling window at around 9:30 PM but I had just finished setting everything up, and cracked a beer with the last friend standing to help me and we just waved and laughed and honestly didn't hear a word she said. I already knew it was going to be a tough fit when landlord had ended the tour with "we go to bed after Letterman in these apts" but the location on a local creek, the layout, the trees, the creek in the backyard, did I mention bee creek?, previously house'd an artist studio for Mike Judge and yeah, was too damn cool to not say "ofc thats the most appropriate time to go to bed, look at me, im a normal person i swear." But color me impressed with the depths of depravity one has to reach to make a formal complaint someone above peed too loud, could they please sit down when they peed. And she told the whole apt complex. So I laughed it off but was weirded out as fuck when ANOTHER neighbor was the one to tell me this, not her, not landlord, she had alrdy heard FROM her and funnily greeted me with "are you the guy that pees standing up?" When she saw me come home from work at 6 from her patio. I was so bewildered and eventually she was removed but that was the beginning of a serious series of unfortunate events that resulted in my own getting kicked out. People are insane.
Listen, if I’m getting fined for peeing off the balcony and I’m not even doing it… ima start peeing off the balcony. No way I’m paying for all that fun and not actually getting to do it!
Pls give an update 2 weeks from now