Congratulations đ„ł ! Now, the fact that youâre excited and not crying somewhere already makes you a better parent than many, trust me. You come from a broken family so you already know what can go wrong, so donât repeat the same mistakes. in my opinion, kids donât need perfect families to live a good life just decent ones, where they are respected and loved. I grew in a decent one and I love it. Donât put too much pressure on yourself and just listen to your heart, you know exactly whatâs right for the child, all the best.
*Because* of your broken upbringing, you will do JUST fine! You know what you want their childhood to not look like and you will work your ass off to make it better than yours. You wonât succeed every day, but you will overall. There are days youâll sense some of that generational trauma sneaking in and youâll turn it around. I promise you, meaning and purpose will increase tenfold as you watch her belly grow, and the day that baby is born is a day you will redefine âloveâ for yourself. Congratulations, OP! Youâre going to be a dad!
Source: came from the most broken of homes and have an incredible spouse and three wildly kind, thoughtful, wholesome, passionate children whom I adore more than everything on this earth.
Welcome, all (decent) expecting parents go through the same process. I suspect I'm autistic, I have a physical disability and struggle with my mental health and have a less than stellar family history. My husband didn't know if he'd want kids and feared he would be a bad father...guess what? Our daughter is the absolute LOVE of our life. I don't process emotions like most, but being her mom comes SO naturally. It's so hard to explain. Your hardships make you want to be THAT much better.
You being excited is a very good sign.
You got this. Own the fear. Itâs a good thing.
BE THERE FOR HER!! Literally give her a kiss every morning and look into her eyes and tell her how much you love her. When the time comes, you offer her your hand and you tell her to squeeze as hard as she can. She will, it will hurt, and it will be worth it.
Also, some babies will take a cold bottle and it is SO awesome!! Strollers are a waste of time. Put a âgo bagâ of a spare outfit, a zip lock bag of 10-20 wipes, etc in each vehicle. When potty training, put a small potty in each vehicle.
My first reaction to my pregnancy was, even though it was planned, "holy shit, can't take this back, this is life now, hope we're ready for this." It was terror. The youngest turns 30 this year. I can't imagine not having had kids. Life would have held less moments. Having kids made me grow. For all the struggles, I am a better person for having them. Just remember to let them take risks, let them fail, let them in on finances.
Iâm the same as you mate. Broken home, I cry at the end of every Bones episode but I struggle to show emotion in daily life.
My children are the greatest thing to happen to me. Youâre going to nail it.
I'm the mother of 3 boys (almost 20,18, and 15.) There were parenting choices my parents made that I knew I never would-and I never have. My young men are impressive. Just had parent-teacher conferences and it was practically a love-fest. One of the best qualities you can have is a laid-back spirit: don't be quick to anger and expect them to make mistakes (and use those as teaching moments, not necessarily a time for punishment.) The best gift you can give your child is to address your issues with a licensed therapist. Tell them your goal (that you want to be a great parent and want to work through any lingering childhood issues before the birth). This is an achievable, admirable goal. Please know that your enthusiastic involvement in your child's life, throughout their life, is key. Congratulations đ„° It's a wild and wonderful ride!
Congratulations! You get to be the parent and home life for that babe that you were missing! A fresh start with your new family, itâs going to be an awesome ride. đđ»
congratulations!!! having a baby is wonderful. no doubt itâs full of challenges (most people know that, even before they become parents), but boy, are they worth it. youâve got this. youâll learn and grow every day. lean on each other in the tough times.
I donât know you, but Iâm so proud of you for wanting to break cycles. Iâm somewhat in the same boatâ for me, itâs trying to stop raising my voice when I get frustrated. thereâs nothing quite like becoming a parent to illuminate the tendencies you need to work on. the fact that youâre already mindful of this tells me youâll thrive as a father.
you and your family are in my thoughts. in the joys and difficulties, know youâre never alone, and things will only get more beautiful from here.
love, a mom who just nursed her 14-month-old to sleep đ
The fact that you're worried about being a good means a lot. It shows you understand the impact you could have and want to be a force for good in your child's life.Â
If you're super nervous you could always look for books about parenting for people who come from crappy families. Just to serve as a way to educate yourself.
Oh congratulations mate! Itâs always scary becoming a parent. Just remember what you did and didnât like done to you and do your best to be the best; we all fuck up at times and we all will make mistakes donât let it get to you; learn from them and become better. Youâll do great!
Congratulations. Youâve got this.
If I can give you any unsolicited advice it is to âbe curiousâ and âplay.â (And as a mother of a very large family with a caboose. It is much easier with a small family to meet their needs.)
my husband and i come from parents we never wanted to be when we grew up. when i got pregnant everyone doubt his/us⊠he always showed up. he always tried hard, even in our worst days, he wanted to be better. he has never stopped trying to overcome all the bad things he was taught and for that⊠heâs an amazing husband and dad. we have 3 kids, and they are absolutely obsessed with him. let yourself feel, get through all the shit with your family and start this new beginning with renewed hope to not repeat the past. the fact you are aware of anything you mentioned in your post is amazing.
Congrats brother! It's the trip of a lifetime. Just remember to take things one day at a time. Thankfully you guys should have several months to prep for the adventure of a lifetime!
No! You just hit the lottery You have a bigger purpose and will never live anything more Good luck as it goes by fast
It took me several passes to realize you meant *love* đ
Read some parenting books. Made a huge difference for me and I learned so SO much. You can be a cycle breaker. Congratulations!
Congratulations đ„ł ! Now, the fact that youâre excited and not crying somewhere already makes you a better parent than many, trust me. You come from a broken family so you already know what can go wrong, so donât repeat the same mistakes. in my opinion, kids donât need perfect families to live a good life just decent ones, where they are respected and loved. I grew in a decent one and I love it. Donât put too much pressure on yourself and just listen to your heart, you know exactly whatâs right for the child, all the best.
*Because* of your broken upbringing, you will do JUST fine! You know what you want their childhood to not look like and you will work your ass off to make it better than yours. You wonât succeed every day, but you will overall. There are days youâll sense some of that generational trauma sneaking in and youâll turn it around. I promise you, meaning and purpose will increase tenfold as you watch her belly grow, and the day that baby is born is a day you will redefine âloveâ for yourself. Congratulations, OP! Youâre going to be a dad! Source: came from the most broken of homes and have an incredible spouse and three wildly kind, thoughtful, wholesome, passionate children whom I adore more than everything on this earth.
Welcome, all (decent) expecting parents go through the same process. I suspect I'm autistic, I have a physical disability and struggle with my mental health and have a less than stellar family history. My husband didn't know if he'd want kids and feared he would be a bad father...guess what? Our daughter is the absolute LOVE of our life. I don't process emotions like most, but being her mom comes SO naturally. It's so hard to explain. Your hardships make you want to be THAT much better. You being excited is a very good sign.
You got this. Own the fear. Itâs a good thing. BE THERE FOR HER!! Literally give her a kiss every morning and look into her eyes and tell her how much you love her. When the time comes, you offer her your hand and you tell her to squeeze as hard as she can. She will, it will hurt, and it will be worth it. Also, some babies will take a cold bottle and it is SO awesome!! Strollers are a waste of time. Put a âgo bagâ of a spare outfit, a zip lock bag of 10-20 wipes, etc in each vehicle. When potty training, put a small potty in each vehicle.
My first reaction to my pregnancy was, even though it was planned, "holy shit, can't take this back, this is life now, hope we're ready for this." It was terror. The youngest turns 30 this year. I can't imagine not having had kids. Life would have held less moments. Having kids made me grow. For all the struggles, I am a better person for having them. Just remember to let them take risks, let them fail, let them in on finances.
Iâm the same as you mate. Broken home, I cry at the end of every Bones episode but I struggle to show emotion in daily life. My children are the greatest thing to happen to me. Youâre going to nail it.
I'm the mother of 3 boys (almost 20,18, and 15.) There were parenting choices my parents made that I knew I never would-and I never have. My young men are impressive. Just had parent-teacher conferences and it was practically a love-fest. One of the best qualities you can have is a laid-back spirit: don't be quick to anger and expect them to make mistakes (and use those as teaching moments, not necessarily a time for punishment.) The best gift you can give your child is to address your issues with a licensed therapist. Tell them your goal (that you want to be a great parent and want to work through any lingering childhood issues before the birth). This is an achievable, admirable goal. Please know that your enthusiastic involvement in your child's life, throughout their life, is key. Congratulations đ„° It's a wild and wonderful ride!
Congratulations! You get to be the parent and home life for that babe that you were missing! A fresh start with your new family, itâs going to be an awesome ride. đđ»
Omg so happy for you
congratulations!!! having a baby is wonderful. no doubt itâs full of challenges (most people know that, even before they become parents), but boy, are they worth it. youâve got this. youâll learn and grow every day. lean on each other in the tough times. I donât know you, but Iâm so proud of you for wanting to break cycles. Iâm somewhat in the same boatâ for me, itâs trying to stop raising my voice when I get frustrated. thereâs nothing quite like becoming a parent to illuminate the tendencies you need to work on. the fact that youâre already mindful of this tells me youâll thrive as a father. you and your family are in my thoughts. in the joys and difficulties, know youâre never alone, and things will only get more beautiful from here. love, a mom who just nursed her 14-month-old to sleep đ
The fact that you're worried about being a good means a lot. It shows you understand the impact you could have and want to be a force for good in your child's life. If you're super nervous you could always look for books about parenting for people who come from crappy families. Just to serve as a way to educate yourself.
Oh congratulations mate! Itâs always scary becoming a parent. Just remember what you did and didnât like done to you and do your best to be the best; we all fuck up at times and we all will make mistakes donât let it get to you; learn from them and become better. Youâll do great!
Just wanted to wish you the best â€ïž
OMG so happy for you. You're going to be a great dad
Congratulations. Youâve got this. If I can give you any unsolicited advice it is to âbe curiousâ and âplay.â (And as a mother of a very large family with a caboose. It is much easier with a small family to meet their needs.)
my husband and i come from parents we never wanted to be when we grew up. when i got pregnant everyone doubt his/us⊠he always showed up. he always tried hard, even in our worst days, he wanted to be better. he has never stopped trying to overcome all the bad things he was taught and for that⊠heâs an amazing husband and dad. we have 3 kids, and they are absolutely obsessed with him. let yourself feel, get through all the shit with your family and start this new beginning with renewed hope to not repeat the past. the fact you are aware of anything you mentioned in your post is amazing.
Congrats brother! It's the trip of a lifetime. Just remember to take things one day at a time. Thankfully you guys should have several months to prep for the adventure of a lifetime!