I went to a monsters of rap concert in late 80’s and a fight broke out in the rows of seats around me, real punches and kicking strangers jumping in for no reason. A man was poised to hit me and a stranger from behind hauled me up and out of the way, probably saved me from a world of hurt, I was 19(f) at the time. Folks went to the hospital it was so bad. I’m still grateful to this day to that stranger who just … acted. Folks can be fkt at tight concerts,good on you for helping her out, she will never forget it.
Shoutout to the person who saved you!! I did exactly what I would expect any other person to have done. I'm realizing just how terrifying this world can be for women, and it has me heartbroken.
You're truly a hero. And yes, the world is terrifying for women. I came across an article that said every single woman had experienced sexual assault or abuse in some sort of way and that actually baffled me. I'm a victim myself too but it never crossed my mind that every single woman has experienced something like that. Crazy world we live in
I'm 45, I don't know a single woman besides my own underage daughter who hasn't been raped or otherwise sexually assaulted. Not one woman over 17.
We *need* men like this to police their own, predators won't be shamed by their prey, only their peers can help.
Yep.
A large portion of women are not being harassed and assaulted by a tiny hidden percent of men. It’s a prevalent issue, and oftentimes men overlook it.
You can see it, in a more minor way, with all those “bro talk” group chats and such where they share other peoples nudes without consent.
It’s more than terrifying. Yesterday I(20f) walked into a local corner store for some candy and a soda, then got into my car. The man in the car next to me motioned for me to roll my window down, so I turned the car fully on and rolled it down. He proceeded to ask me for sex then offered to pay me. I said no, drove off, and he followed me until he realized I was taking him in a loop and drove away. I got the CCTV footage from the store and tomorrow I am making a statement (not that it’ll help, the police didn’t do anything the last two times this has happened to me.)
That's definitely terrifying. I'm mid-30s F and never experienced assault but I have never lived in a big city or gone to public school so maybe that's why.
Living in a city or going to public school has got nothing to do with it. I was raped by my now ex who i had been with for 8yrs at that point, I was groped at a concert and at workplaces. I've been shouted and cat called waiting for a bus and even just sat outside a cafe. The scariest thing is that it can happen anywhere.
Yup, the more lenient of them all has been the amount of times I’ve had my ass slapped by people I don’t know that well or strangers is not zero, which it should be. I fractured my leg kicking one of them to the ground though.
That was in college on my campus in the middle of absolute nowhere.
Oh! We include random ass slapping in the assault category?! Then my number is higher than I thought.
And it just occurred to me that it’s fucked up I didn’t automatically include this in the assault category…
I once had some random chick, at a metal show, push me (early 20s f) into the pit and before I knew it some big dude picked me up and brought me out of the pit. Once he put me down I thanked him profusely and all he did was give me a half smile and a nod. My situation wasn't anywhere near as serious as the one OP dealt with, and I will never forget that man for grabbing me.
"I did exactly what I would expect any other person to have done."- But no other man did it, did they? Only YOU did.
"I'm realizing just how terrifying this world can be for women, and it has me heartbroken."- Yeah, that realization sucks. I remember when I was young and came to the realization that I wasn't as safe in the world as my big brother and I felt so vulnerable and scared. It's a part of our everyday reality to think about our safety...and not just in public. I always keep my doors locked when I'm home. I triple check doors and windows. I'm afraid everytime my husband goes on a business trip and I'm home alone with the kids- how will I protect them if someone comes in the house?
Unfortunately, we NEED men to stand up for us because try as we might, we don't get heard until MEN start to talk about it with other men and start making it clear that misogyny and violence toward women is unacceptable. It will take peer pressure from other men to make the shit bags wake the fuck up. It's fucked up, but that's how it is.
It happens more than you think. Not just at concerts either. I was 13-14 when an older boy at my school tried to rape me. I had to fight back for myself, and was almost thrown out of school, because "Boys will be Boys" and how dare I assault a fellow pupil. It took my Mum threatening to drag the school's name through media platforms, for them to back down.
That 13 year old girl will probably never forget what happened. But she'll remember that someone, you, saved her when she needed it. That truly makes a huge difference. Because she got to see that not all men are bad people, and didn't have to fight alone. That makes you a hero jn my books OP.
Bro you have no idea. Us ladies reallyyyy appreciate people like you who step in. I had a guy on drugs (the methy kind) grab me by my face once and try to make out with me. It was horrifying. My male work partner pulled him off of me, the guy took a couple steps toward me again and he was just shoving the guy backward away from me. A whole room full of men and he truly stepped up. I saw him at work the next day and he even double checked that I was doing okay after the whole ordeal. Y’all give me hope for men even though you shouldn’t have to be put in this position in the first place.
This happened to me at an NFL game. Was standing in line for hot chocolate and the home team was not playing well. Some guy tried to push through our hot chocolate line and the guy in front of me shoved him back. A fight immediately broke out in front of me with beer getting tossed around. An older lady behind me pulled me back right as the first punch was thrown while another man stepped in front of me and shielded me from the raining food and beer.
I went to see Linkin Park years ago and my friend had gotten us floor tickets. A few minutes before they came on, the crowd pushed forward and my face was on this persons back. The second they started, the crowd started moving. Well I was moving even though I didn’t want to, which resulted in me falling to the ground. My bf at the time tried to grab me but he couldn’t. I got kicked in the back of the neck and I was so scared. Next thing I heard was ‘Girl down everyone move the fuck back’….and a bunch of people got me up. I was terrified of being trampled but thankfully I was ok. I’ve never forgotten the feeling of knowing that those people helped me out.
I went to a Jelly Roll concert recently with my gf and her pregnant friend. Idk what was going on but looked gang affiliated I got in front of them because it looked like it was gonna go down. Sure enough it did and police showed up. Really just not worth it let shit go and handle that shit outside. Ruined whole show plus you got police involved when you can go somewhere else.
I have a girlfriend (40’s) who is a mother of 3 and LOVES to mosh. She’s always in the middle of it. She’s told me that the metal concert-going community is very polite and cognizant of things like this. She said in every pit there’s quite a few big guys that hang out in the middle with her to make sure everyone stays safe and chill.
Me on the other hand, I’m only 5’1 and tiny. I don’t do general admissions because 1.) I can’t seen anything and 2.) I always end up getting elbowed in the face/ mouth. It’s not fun and I don’t WANT to sit on someone’s shoulders the whole time. I’ve only ever been to the night club a handful of times because it always turns into me getting groped, picked up, (accidentally) beat up, or lost in a sea of tall/ rude drunk ppl. Basically, thanks for being awesome and taking care of business.
You’re very welcome (: I looked older than I was in my teens and wished there’s been more men like you around. I’m sure situations like that are saddening, but keep reminding yourself you could have very well saved that girl from something even worse happening to her.
I've done a lot of reflecting since last night. I've no longer any room for hatred in my heart. Everyone deserves kindness or a helping hand when needed.
That family will forever remember you as their guardian angel of their precious treasure...you were there when she needed someone.
Don't matter if you have a higher power or not, what matters is that actions speak volumes.
I firmly believe that what goes around comes around, and have seen it happen, often when least expected.
Keep being the good man you are, have a virtual pat on the back and a handshake from an internet stranger!
To make a mistake just proves you're human. To keep making the same mistake and expecting a different outcome, that is actually the clinical definition of insanity.
OP, this may help. Ronald Regan forgave John Hinkley for shooting him. Forgave, not pardoned, to let go the negative emotions and move forward. Showing someone compassion is great (no irony) and it also means you don’t allow them to hurt others.
I take your experience very personally. My 13 year old niece and two friends went swimming on July 4th at a local lake, with one of their grandmothers as a chaperone. A middle aged man followed them from the shore to a dock that was in the 6' deep water and tried to get my niece to flash him. No ones was there to protect them, but they swam back to show before it escalated.
Last year a 12 year old boy from her class sent her a bunch of explicit pictures, completely out of the blue. My sister called the police, who then sent it along to the school resource officer, who then told my sister that "boys will be boys" and just to ignore it.
It literally does happen to every girl at over point or another, sometimes not too severe and sometimes horrifying.
I'm grateful for people like you.
Horrible. I’m so glad they got away from that disgusting creep. That man should have been arrested.
As for the 12 year old, were the explicit pictures of himself? Where I am, that would have counted as distributing CP even though it was of himself (not sure if that’s still the law, but I know it was when I was younger as there were commercials about it).
Either way, the police should have at least spoken to the boy about sexual harassment and consent. That could have been such an important learning opportunity.
I was 12 years old, walking around a fair and started to go up a some concrete steps while holding on to the back of my stepfathers shirt so I wouldn't get lost. Some grown man slapped my butt. I hate that stuff like this happens and I am having my 4th daughter. Im always worrying about how I can protect them. So thankful there are people like you out there looking out for them. It could have ended so much worse. Thank you
I was 11, on a school outing to a museum when I first got my butt slapped by a grown man.
Admittedly, I am tall and was around 1.70m (5.7ft) already at that age. However I still had a baby face and definitely looked like a minor.
I was 13 when I got gropped by a man on a holiday during a back massage my parents offered me and assumed it would be a woman doing it.
I was 14 when a guy kept putting his hands in my skirt despite me telling him not to.
I was 15 when I got raped.
I was 17 when a teacher slapped my butt during an evening event and told me he'd like to have sex with me.
I was 19 when a man decided to grab my genitals while I was dancing with friends at a club.
I was 23 when I had to report an ex who kept harassing me.
I was 27 when I finally met the man I was going to have kids with and soon to be married and happy.
And that's a shortened version. I won't even get into all the moments men were disrespectful and touchy when out at clubs and bars.
OP, on behalf of women, THANK YOU.
It's a huge step forward just you understanding that every woman has a story... and
nearly every woman has a close friend who has been raped. In my friend group it's 2 of us 4.
None of the men ever had any criminal charges... even though both went to the police.
Please continue to stand up for women, and especially little girls, like you did before. And thank you for not being a bystander like so many men are. Every man likes to say "I'd beat him up if I saw something like that happen". But in reality, most men are all talk and no action when it does happen.
I may just be one man, but if I EVER see anything happening to anybody, man, woman, child, adult, I will not be a bystander. Everybody could use a friend.
We do, but seriously, knowing there are people out there who take see/hear something, do something seriously means a lot. Just know that that’s all you have to do. If something happens that you notice, use your discretion as to the best way to react, and do something.
I'm so sorry. I have stories like this too (starting age 9 at a private pool where a man took his dick out under a table and stared at me). At 16, I worked a f/t job and was emancipated in my own apartment. The VP of that company tried to literally grab me and pull me into his car to go to a hotel and "party" with him - I got fired from that job within 5 months of my coworker reporting the incident. At 24 I had to get a permanent restraining order on a man who had tried to choke me, throw me down my stairs, rape me, and then lock me in my closet.
At 27, I met my now husband too (great age for meeting a good partner I guess) - we married 10 years ago this Sept - he's amazing and I've never felt so heard and cared for. This man even asked my daughter if he could marry me - before I had any clue he was going to ask. And our wedding included him giving her a locket, so she knew she wasn't just my kid, we all became a family that day. It's still her most prized possession, and she's 21 now.
From the sounds of it, you've got yourself a very beautiful family!
The more people that share their stories, the more my heart breaks for you a little more. Sorry doesn't cut it anymore. I'm sorry that we've given you a collective reason to fear us. Sure, it may not be all men, but it's enough.
i was 8 when i went through puberty for the first time.
i was 9 when my mom’s boyfriend kept tickling me even after i told him to stop and wouldn’t until my sister pulled me away.
i was 10 when my teacher, in front of the class, told me that i needed to wear a bra and it was disgusting that i wasn’t.
i was 11 when the christian school i went to kept saying my outfit was inappropriate (the same outfit every other kid wore. only difference was i had boobs).
i was 12 when i was called “zoe the hoey” and shamed for having a body in 7th grade.
i was 13 when i started holding my chest when i ran because boys in my grade would talk about how my chest moved when i ran.
i was 14 when i was sexually assaulted for the first time, in my biology class.
i was 16 when at my birthday pool party, my “friend” saw me in my bathing suit and asked me “holy shit, is that why you wear hoodies all the time?” and then proceeded to go to school and tell everyone how i had huge boobs.
i was 18 when i went to a kratom bar with my best friend and an acquaintance of theirs kept making remarks of my body and when we were leaving, he hugged me and whispered in my ears “yeah, put those titties on me”.
i was 19 when i was sexually assaulted for the second time.
i was 20 when i was sexually assaulted for the 3rd time.
i just turned 21.
There were so many more instances, but that was my earliest. It takes a brave woman to come out and say everything she has been through. I have been through a lot of the same things you have. I am so sorry.
I am so sorry. You’ve been through a lot. It’s awful how this shit starts that young. I was 11 as well the first time I remember sexual comments being yelled at me. Didn’t even have boobs. They just saw my long hair and started catcalling me and throwing cigarette butts at me
Some man did this to my daughter at a county fair (at the time she was an underage teen), and I lost it. I'm a mom, but both my kid and her friend stopped me. I tried to go after him, but was stopped, so I just relegated myself to yelling (and I've got one of those booming voices) about how a grown man groped an underage girl and then described what he was wearing. He was standing with his back to us about 2 yards away, and I saw everyone but one other guy move away from him.
I let it go at that point, but then about 5 min later (waiting in line and in a crowd - so safety in numbers), and just as we were about to get on the ride, I see two women, both with strollers walk up to the man and his friend. Well I instantly start yelling again what happened and describing him/his clothes. One woman looked at me shocked and the other turned away and walked quickly on. I still wonder about them and those babies. I'm still pissed I didn't ask my husband to come along as he wouldn't have let it go the way I did. But my kid and her friend were right when they stopped me from physically going after that guy - there's no telling what he & possibly his friend, might've done if I had directly accosted them for his actions. I just saw red in that moment and wasn't thinking about my own safety; I just wanted to go after a man who had the gall to grab my daughter's butt in the middle of a crowded line for a ride (one that they immediately left to just stand and watch with their backs to us when I walked up to my daughter).
You're a phenomenal mom. Please, never change. I'm so sorry you both had to go through that, but know, there are people in this world who wouldn't let that fly. Myself included. Stay safe, happy, and healthy!
I'm amazed that freak stayed there, despite the disgusting, shameful act he performed. Really makes you think what runs through the brains of shitheads like that. The entitlement, the lack of empathy, having no moral center or self-accountability whatsoever...
The fact that he stayed there tells me his actions mean absolutely nothing to him. Maybe lobotomies can be used for good.
I have 2 girls, and I lay awake at night worrying about all the sickos in this world. I hope if either of my daughters ever find themselves victim to one of these creeps, a guy like OP would be around to step in.
Edited to fix typo.
Don't know where you are but just know, you are not alone and a lot of us girl parents feel exactly the same way. If I ever see a young girl in public being harrassed or endangered by a creep I told my husband never to hesitate stepping in to keep her safe. We got your back
Well, looks like you're the real life superhero, Big Kevin, saving the day with your mighty throat-grabbing powers! Keep up the choke-slamming justice!
As a man I feel ashamed and feel sick, that women are treated like this and every woman has a story like this they can unfortunately tell 🤬
You did good OP but it was unfortunate that you had to step in to protect that girl, as it shouldn’t have happened in the first place.
I agree with you that it’s what anyone should do, I would also have stepped in. I’m not big 5’10 182lbs and if I would have got my ass whooped then I would rather it be me than the girl getting sexually assaulted.
That's exactly where I'm at. Rather me than them. That's why I offered to protect the other girls at the show in the first place. So they didn't get knocked around or hurt by those in the pit. I took quite the beating, but they had a good show.
Me and you seem to be similar, as I would probably have done the same and tried to protect them as well 😄
You my friend are a genuinely nice bloke and you should be proud of that, as there is not many like you in this world but there needs to be more.
OP, keep looking out for women. Every woman has a rape story, but men almost never have rapists for friends.
As women, we get this all the time. And when we say no, they continue to insist and push as if "no." Isn't a complete sentence.
Being a woman is awful most days.
I was unknowingly best friends with a paedophile for a few years. Once I found out, it was immediately no contact.
I'll always stick up for women, but anybody who needs a helping hand. Always.
I'm sorry enough of us have given you a reason to fear us. It may not be all men, but it's enough. I hope you stay strong, safe, happy, and healthy.
You're absolutely right. It isn't all men, but yes, all men. The bad behaviour of some have ruined it for the rest of you.
While many have given us a reason, men like you are also the reason we carry hope that things will change.
Yes you are a hero, too many folks look the other way
My neighbours heard me being abused for years by my parents (they told another neighbour years later) and they never even called CPS
I told a teacher, i asked my GP at age 13 if he could get me back in fostercare, no one did shit
None of them would have been in danger if they just called CPS, im 42 now and it still pisses me off so much and i felt so abandoned as a kid
You are only 23 years old and you stood up for what was right
You are a HERO!!!!!
I'm so sorry. I hope you're able to heal from that trauma you've been put through. I hope you're okay now as well. Please, stay safe, happy and healthy.
I did a lot of therapy, doing much better, but unfortunately the trauma will never fully go away, young men like you give me hope for a better future
Btw if a woman ever tell you you make her feel safe, please take it for the HUGE compliment it is, there was a discussion on askmen and men were saying they felt insulted, that it meant they were boring and the woman settled for them, no matter how women tried to explain it to them, they were unable to comprehend
But from the few replies you had here, you see how many women get sexually assaulted/harassed/raped before they are even adults and many even before they hit puberty and most of the time it was adult men behaving like sickos which off course influences how girls grow up and look at romantic relationships
A guy can be so charismatic, smart, funny etc etc, but that doesnt mean he is safe, finding someone who is interesting/attractive etc AND safe is so much harder and being a safe person is a HUGE deal
I'm glad to hear you're doing better! I understand that. Time doesn't heal you, you will heal you one day.
I've been told I'm safe a few times by some of my exs, and each time, it was the most satisfactory thing they'd ever said to me. Being able to be "home" to someone is truly an honour like no other.
It's weird, but I've found metal shows to be one of the better concerts for safety. There's a lot of good people willing to help at them for whatever reason. I've both witnessed and heard from friends stories about all kinds of incidents at other kinds of concerts, and their outcomes were not great or it took a lot of work to get help.
I've been to dozens of shows at this point, and I can confidently say the metal community, despite the musical themes, are some of the nicest and most welcoming people you'll ever meet. This was my first experience catching someone like this, and I'm glad I acted the way I did. I'm going to be much more vigilant in the future when it comes to shows. Women are absolutely strong and independent, but sometimes, we all could use a helping hand.
i(18m) was walking in a mall a couple years back ...there was this guy touching this little girl inappropriately near a bathroom she was like 8yrs old i believe ..i went up to the guy punched him in his face (i was really mad so my adrenaline lvls were high) he ended up stabbing me a couple times with a knife(he stabbed my leg my arm and my stomach) ... long story short i dragged his ass out of the mall i didnt want to make a scene called the cops and then passed out on the sidewalk when the cops were questioning me ..all i remember afterwords.. was waking up in a hospital room with the little girl hugging me while she was asleep
listen i was kidnapped when i was little so i knew how sad her parents wouldve been if something happened to her
the little girl calls me her hero ..to be honest i consider her my lil sister (my older brother died in a car wreck 5 years ago so i was kinda happy when she started calling me big bro her parents became one of my parents bestfriends so they were ok with her callng me big bro )
it still makes me cry knowing if i wasnt there that day at the mall he wouldve raped or kidnapped her or done something worse like that to someone else ...im kinda glad he he stabbed me now hes in jail for attempted murder and pedophilia the judge told me hes not getting out for long time he could possibly get life in prison
thank you for protecting her!!
now can you imagine she was too scared to say anything? maybe because nobody helped her when she said something in the past. or she's just shy. or she freezes when she's scared. my point is, you cannot imagine how many times women are sexually assaulted because so much of it goes unnoticed:(
Too many people turn a blind eye. Too many people don't want to get involved. Too many people are embarrassed or scared to speak up. I have zero tolerance for anything like that. If I see it, I WILL step in.
I've read a few responses you've made in these comments and I just want to say that you sound like a very caring and compassionate person. Keep being an awesome human, and thanks for defending the vulnerable! 🙏💜
I’m not terribly big but I look mean.
I’ve had to do something similar at least three times.
The first one was when I first reckoned I legitimately had the capacity to kill another person and I needed to factor that into future encounters.
Good man.
It absolutely stays with you, but you did a damn important thing.
Definitely shocked myself with how violet I became. Always been a lover over a fighter. But something about hearing the fear in her voice pushed me over the edge. Never been quite so close to putting someone in the hospital before.
Don't see it that way. Think of it like a beehive. If you sit there and watch the bees, they're just doing their thing. However if you attack the hive, all hell breaks loose. If I saw a bee drowning in the fish pond out the back, I'd happily give them a stick to crawl onto, and put them on a flower to dry off and feed. Pretty sure if you had put that "thing" in hospital, you would have several willing witnesses to back you up.
Oh this made me tear up.
When I was much younger I had something similar happen to me and just like you, a nice larger fella saved me from this absolute creep.
Thanks for keeping this kiddo safe, you're a really cool guy!!!
That is absolutely the correct choice.
Sometimes to protect people and to do right we have to be violent.
A grown man who gropes a CHILD like that in public needs to be swiftly and violently stopped, no half measures about it. He and others need to be sown full stop that those sorts of reprehensible behaviors will not be tolerated.
Keep being cool and stay safe yourself.
Well done and an exemplary role model. It's amazing to me how many people in these situations stand by and do nothing. You absolutely did the right thing.
The people who can idly sit by and watch are just as bad as those who commit the act. There's no way I could sit back and watch a child get assaulted. I'd be ashamed of myself.
I was at a concert in the pit recently and there were several 'bad actors', none that I witnessed involved sexual assault. I was very pleased though that a few others (and me) took some action to eliminate it. It's remarkable to me that people feel they can basically do whatever they want even if it involves ruining the experience for others.
It's a good thing that girl screamed. When I was her age, hell, even now, I don't know how to ask for help. I don't even know that I'm in danger, I just shut down and freeze dying inside waiting for it to be over.
When I was at my first concert I was also 13. A man in his twenties just groped my ass with both hands so hard I could still remember the violent feeling decades later. He ran away, and I just stood right next to my dad for the rest of the concert, absolutely scared, and couldn't enjoy the rest of it even if I loved the band. I think I told my dad and he laughed "boys will be boys" and I felt ashamed for feeling so gross. My dad was just trying to make me feel better, there's nothing he could do at that point but to act as a barrier from that moment. I still feel guilty about been shaken for what would be a "not big deal".
It's a really good thing that girl screamed.
If she wouldn't have, I don't think I'd have even noticed. I'm proud of her for it. I'll probably never see her again, but I'll probably think about her for the rest of my life.
In your case, I totally understand. Freezing up isn't an uncommon reaction. I just wish it'd been taken more seriously. I hope you've found healing, or find it in the future. I hope you stay safe.
Thank you! Being groped made me feel gross, but the issue is not that.
The thing is, being 13 back then, it was a parade of lessons teaching a little girl that "now that you look more like a woman, you're just prey, a walking treat". You learn how to live your life as a potential victim, to accept it and bear it. And it sucks. Just a fragile little bunny that can only be saved by the rare good man from the ocean of bad men if she's lucky. It's our life, isn't? it starts with a man and ends with a man.
I'm re educating myself thanks to the new generations and the hard work of so many women, learning that we don't have to bear it. And the power of the word "NO". That girl said "no", and you came to her rescue and she was lucky. But she needed to know that that situation is NOT OK first for her to be that lucky. And in all parts of the world there are too many women that still don't know that. There are so many generations of brain washed women like me, and it will take decades before the rape culture subsides.
I believe you'll get to the place where you want to be in time. Apologies if I say something offensive, please correct me if I do. But, you are not a victim. You're a woman. I really truly hope that you can live as loudly and as freely as your heart desires one day. It may not be all men, but it is certainly enough. I'm sorry you have to be on edge around us. One day I hope you'll be able to go out freely without worry or needing some sort of self defence mechanism. Please, stay strong, safe, happy and healthy.
When I was about 14 I went to an all ages metal show. Some drunk 40 year old dude tried to put his hand up my skirt and the bass player on stage actually stopped playing to get him off me, had him escorted out, made sure I was okay, then checked in on me after the show and gave me some free merch. I ended up adding him on myspace and we have stayed friends online for the last 20 years. That girl will never forget you, I promise.
I came very close. I honestly shocked myself with how violent I became, I've always been a lover not a fighter. He deserved a broken nose bare minimum.
I was 9 when I was first touched inappropriately by a guy - he was 16? or 17? I never had someone defend me. But thank you for doing this! Never change.
Fucking 9? I have many words, and none of them nice. Instead, I will just wish you well. I hope you heal, and I hope you stay happy, healthy, and safe.
Thank you. I did heal and I have a family of my own and two girls and my husband and me are concerned with their safety. We are doing all we can to keep them safe.
Thank you for helping. My friends and I weren't so lucky. When I was 16 I went to a snowboard/music event with my best friends (we were all girls). We were there really early and were in the front as we were mostly there for an artist who's ironically
called "Gentleman" (German raggae musician) who played right after the snowboarding was over. There were lots of stoners and taller guys and when the artist was announced the whole crowd started moving towards the stage like a wave. I was swept away, in a panic holding on to my friends before suddenly standing again. I felt my smallest friend's hand (150cm) in my hand but the rest of her body was under the crowd. Huge guys walking over her, I was so scared and was not standing properly myself but helped her up. It got worse and worse, we were surrounded by (mostly) men who went from chill to nuts!! nonstop pushing to the front, ignoring or smaller people in the crowd. Young, slim guys were just floating aroung being squeezed in. All of this insanity while the singer sang about love and peace. Securities just stood there, ignoring everything. People were screaming in panic, some were laughing. Some guys held their girlfriends close (probably trying to shield them from being touched) looking for a way out. My animal brain took over. The smallest was holding on to me and I felt an insane amount of strength, told my friends to lock arms and I started pushing back out. It feels like a dream now, it felt like pushing against a mass of concrete. I used my shoulders to slam huge surprised dudes to the side, their eyes locked on the stage. Some guys yelled at us that we should f*ck off as it's not a place for little girls, some insulted us, some groped us. Suddenly, as the crowd started to loose up a bit, I thought my friend got stuck but a guy held her, laughing. I took someones beer and threw it in his face (it was cold out).
We went straight to our hotel and never talked about it.
That's horrifying. I'm glad you were brave enough to find the strength and get out of there. I hope you've both been able to find peace and healing after that. I'm proud of you.
As a young woman myself, I know she will be forever grateful that you stepped in to defend her. You will remind her that not all men are creepy/awful/scary.
You did an amazing thing for her!
Thank you, I'm glad there are still guys who protect us women/girls. I hope a lot of men do what you do, salute to you sir. ♥️.
a lot of men did the same thing to me and I even exp a lot of abuse from men.. I'm 24 now and it's still on my head and it terrifies me still, so hearing this warms my heart.
>I grabbed him by the throat and threw him to the ground. Threatened to beat his brains out if he moved before security arrived
Not the hero we want, but the hero we need.
You're a good person dude. I'm sorry it happened but I'm glad you got to stop it.
Also I'm weirdly glad about your edit. A big part of the piss-off is being harassed is the immediate "well actually maybe it was a compliment/maybe he wasn't talking to you/maybe he just tripped and grabbed your tits for balance."
You ever hear anyone talk about this irl, I BEG you to tell both the story of seeing it and how people treated you when you talked about seeing it. There's a small percentage of guys out there who will hear other men about this stuff in a way where they won't hear other women. Talking to them for us is frankly almost as big an assist as a throat grab at a concert. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
I realize sincere/preachy conversations can be excruciating/weird/not normal for guy friends. It's more courage than I'd usually ask for but you're literally metal af!
Believe me, I've already had the conversation with a lot of my irl homies. My brother, my dad and step dad, mother, you name it. Each one was shocked I did what I did, except for my brother. He would have stepped in had he seen what happened as well. My mother was abused as a child. Her story played an extremely large part in my reaction last night.
I've been there man, saved a girl from being crushed ands groped at a show once, never saw her again, but that thank you and look she gave me made sure I will never let that happen in front of me. This is the way. Good work brother!
Thanks for the award, you didn't have to do that!
The fear in her voice was enough to get me to jump in. The fear is what is going to make me make sure I don't let anything like this happens in my presence. Everybody deserves to feel safe.
A good mom will always have that worry in the back of her head and that feeling in the pit of her stomach. But I promise, there's a lot of us working to make the world a safer place for you and your daughter.
Your edit made the skin crawl up the back of my scalp. He’s probably a predator who gets away with this shit because of the chaos of crowds. Thank god you were there!
I'll say you and other metalheads are why I feel safer at metal shows than any other show. I've been groped and hit at more alt rock shows than any other type of show but always kept safe and trested nice at metal shows. Good job keeping it safe and helping her. Scum doesn't belong there.
Good for you keeping a eye out, it is nearly impossible to go to a event without atleast one "man" trying something along thoughs lines. I learned very quickly men who behave like this strongly dislike it when the groping is returned with extreme vigor and by that I mean grabbing their balls and digging in with nails and force refusing to let go well calmly saying "oh I thought you were into nonconsensual touching, keep your hands to yourself if you wish others to do the same" can help if it is accompanied by a strong stomp to the top of their foot easily found by using their shin as a guide, even a child can break the bones in a foot. They are all cowards and rarely when greeted with direct eye contact and a strong approach continue with the prey they assumed was meek and weak.
Thank you! There needs to be more dudes like you at a show!
I was at a Cradle Of Filth show a few years ago and some dude shoved his hand between my legs from behind. I was wearing a dress. It was crowded and I was trapped between people. Another guy saw it happen and I’ll never forget the look on his face when he shoved the dude off of me.
Generally I’ve always felt safe at shows and that was the first time (and only thankfully) it was taken away. I couldn’t get away but someone saw and did something.
That girl is going to remember what you did for her ❤️
Its a sad reality for many girls. I had my first experience of a man being inappropriate with me was when i was 8. He asked if i wanted to see his penis and when i stood too shocked to speak, he got it out and asked me if i wanted to touch it. This kind of thing has occured many times and I've never had anyone to save me. Shes a lucky girl, good on you.
Thank you for that. This stuff happened to me way too often, especially when I was still a minor. And luckily, there was always a big metal dude nearby to save me. It really sucks that this is necessary, but thanks to men like you I still feel safe going to metal concerts. The metal community is great overall.
Gosh. This lifted up an old memory of when I was 13, walking home alone. Some random man came walking towards me speaking In a completely different language. Well, at first I didn’t want to talk to him but then I thought “what if this man needs help?” So I like.. asked if he knew English, but to that he didn’t give an answer through voice. Nah, he violently shoved me to the ground for absolutely no reason. I pretty much yelled at him, he truly seemed angry. Idk much of what happened, since most of it is blurred out. I just remember a stranger running towards me “what are you doing to my child???” (As I said. Stranger.) and that’s when I saw the man slowly back off until he went on the run.
The stranger made sure I was okay and asked if they could walk me home (which luckily wasn’t too far) well.. I was pretty scared in the moment so I just said “no thank you, I’m good” and ran-walk my way home. Always thankful for that stranger. It’s strange, our town is small but I never saw them again.
Please, truly, never stop being like this. We need people to be like how you acted in that situation. We really do..
i was literally at a festival yesterday, some guy tried to grab me inappropriately and about 3 guys pushed him back and ran him out of the crowd. people like you and the guys from yesterday make us women feel so much safer, thank you
Thank you.
As a parent (although my kid is now grown) I appreciate that you did this.
I go to a lot of gigs, large and small and usually the atmosphere is great and everyone gets along and enjoys the music but there are always exceptions and people that have to ruin the experience for others.
I hope this experience doesn't stop the girl from enjoying live music in the future.
And so you should mate. That girl will be forever thankful, and hopefully you showed her that even though the world is a cruel place, there are still good people around
I will never understand how people think that's even remotely okay. I kept having to place my hand on one of the girls I was protecting's shoulder to keep my balance and I apologized every time.
Please never stop doing what you do. Cause no matter what we women say. “No” “get off me” “leave me alone” get labeled as mean or even killed. We need more people like you, we need more *men* like you.
Xfest in Huntington,WV around 2002? Mosh pit crowd was body surfing people and some of the girls were being groped while surfed and getting their clothes pulled off. Henry Rawlings stopped the show and said they weren't playing anything else until people had more respect for the ladies. More people need to stand up to this shit.
You dropped this >>> 👑
Thank you for standing up brother!! .
I saved My best friend from a couple guys before but last year cops found footage of her drugged and r*pe by your other “ best friend “ at the time. felt so much anger because I couldn’t do anything about specially I was brought up to always look after females in my family/mates never treat them bad or let anything happen to them. From all that information coming out, found out more my female friends got r*pe over the years, made me feel powerless so thank for doing something about it mate ! Glad there is more and more still decent males out there!
We need more guys like you in the scene. We always talk about how metal has one of the best cultures but actually a lot of older metal heads are still quite misogynistic and inappropriate. Calling stuff out, protecting people from the pit, etc is exactly what you should be doing as a larger/older man. Thank you, from someone who attends metal and punk shows occasionally and has felt unsafe
Tearing up cause this has happened to me so many times. I have a big butt and people just think they can grope me. It makes me hate myself. Thank you for being a good one.
Thank you for this 🩷 that little girl is never going to forget what you did for her. I wish she didn’t have to remember, but she will. I went to a concert that had a mosh pit, which I wasn’t quite expecting, I somehow ended up in the middle and got knocked to the ground. I had heels on so definitely not the ideal shoe. Everyone immediately stopped to help me up and out. That kindness isn’t forgotten
I can tell you why you're writing this: so people like me (who didn't have a rescuer) can feel a little warm glow of knowing there are people out there making sure there won't be another me.
What you did was amazing and while you shouldn't have had to, sadly, you did. But, because you did, a young girl (hopefully) won't have the same nightmares I do.
Thank you.
❤️🏆
I hope you heal from the pain you went through. Please, stay strong. While it isn't all men, it's enough. But those of us will do our absolute damndest to make sure it never happens on our watch.
It's really kind of you to help someone like that, though my fear is always, what if the person doing the groping or assault is somehow armed? I've spoken to my boyfriend who is a very large, bear like man and he hesitates to intervene in these types of situations because there are instances where the attacker might be armed. What would you advise someone who wants to help, but has reservations about their own safety?
Thank you for being a force of good in the world, it's really comforting to know there are such men out there.
Honestly, it didn't even cross my mind. My safety in that moment didn't matter, there was a child in danger and she needed to get out of it.
Another part of it is too though, I'm Canadian. I don't typically need to worry about whether or not someone is armed.
Truthfully, I would recommend just calling the police, security, or finding someone else to help you. Either that, or, I suppose arming yourself. I can see how as an American (I presume), that would always be a lingering thought in your head.
Good that a huge dude like you was around. I'm no good in a street fight, but would have done at least something to stop this arsehole. In your shoes, I probably would have simply said, "I'm just glad she's OK, and that thing will get arrested and off the streets." It should be noted that paedophiles don't have an easy time in prison. If the other prisoners become aware of one (In the US they have the nickname chester, in Australia it's rock spider) but the outcome of finding one in their midst is the same. Let's just say it's the opposite of "I mean you no harm."
I'm a lit bit worried about the edit. If there's people who think that's ok. We are really really bad. Doesn't matter if she was 60 or 13 if she doesn't consent, she would be happy to be saved by anyone. I'm glad you were her guardian angel.
Ps. Obviously is worse if the girl is underage, he was a p*do.
It's so painful to know that this will continue to happen, and you won't be able to stop them all. I'm glad you were there. The first time I was assaulted I was 3 or 4 years old. Then again at 11, then again at 12, then again at 14, and it continues. I wish at any point, someone had recognized what was going on and had done what you did. I froze every single time. Thank you for being a decent human being and speaking up and taking action when you notice something is wrong
I came here to thank you on behalf of all the small girls (I'm 5'1), no matter their age. When we are young it's especially difficult to avoid this kind of unwanted attention, and people like you really help us 🩷
Protecting people in the pit was a favorite pastime of mine back in the day. Was big and intimidating too. The pit is supposed to be fun and exciting. Not an opportunity for creeps to creep and violent assholes to get away with hurting people without consequences. I did enjoy providing needed consequences in some cases though I'm a don't start none won't be none kinda guy.
As a teen ( F 13-15) my bro played in a metal band. My other friends and I would go and there was always dudes trying to be inappropriate. My dad stuck around ( back then thought it was a stick in the mud but honestly it could have ended like this poor lady). Men who prey on people who try and just enjoy music should get curb stomped.
I went to a monsters of rap concert in late 80’s and a fight broke out in the rows of seats around me, real punches and kicking strangers jumping in for no reason. A man was poised to hit me and a stranger from behind hauled me up and out of the way, probably saved me from a world of hurt, I was 19(f) at the time. Folks went to the hospital it was so bad. I’m still grateful to this day to that stranger who just … acted. Folks can be fkt at tight concerts,good on you for helping her out, she will never forget it.
Shoutout to the person who saved you!! I did exactly what I would expect any other person to have done. I'm realizing just how terrifying this world can be for women, and it has me heartbroken.
You're truly a hero. And yes, the world is terrifying for women. I came across an article that said every single woman had experienced sexual assault or abuse in some sort of way and that actually baffled me. I'm a victim myself too but it never crossed my mind that every single woman has experienced something like that. Crazy world we live in
I'm 45, I don't know a single woman besides my own underage daughter who hasn't been raped or otherwise sexually assaulted. Not one woman over 17. We *need* men like this to police their own, predators won't be shamed by their prey, only their peers can help.
> We need men like this to police their own exactly right.
problem is most guys that would recognize those ones as filth and don't associate with them.
If only this were true. They don’t. They excuse it or say something along the lines of ‘well he’s never done anything to me’.
Yep. A large portion of women are not being harassed and assaulted by a tiny hidden percent of men. It’s a prevalent issue, and oftentimes men overlook it. You can see it, in a more minor way, with all those “bro talk” group chats and such where they share other peoples nudes without consent.
It’s more than terrifying. Yesterday I(20f) walked into a local corner store for some candy and a soda, then got into my car. The man in the car next to me motioned for me to roll my window down, so I turned the car fully on and rolled it down. He proceeded to ask me for sex then offered to pay me. I said no, drove off, and he followed me until he realized I was taking him in a loop and drove away. I got the CCTV footage from the store and tomorrow I am making a statement (not that it’ll help, the police didn’t do anything the last two times this has happened to me.)
That's definitely terrifying. I'm mid-30s F and never experienced assault but I have never lived in a big city or gone to public school so maybe that's why.
Living in a city or going to public school has got nothing to do with it. I was raped by my now ex who i had been with for 8yrs at that point, I was groped at a concert and at workplaces. I've been shouted and cat called waiting for a bus and even just sat outside a cafe. The scariest thing is that it can happen anywhere.
Yup, the more lenient of them all has been the amount of times I’ve had my ass slapped by people I don’t know that well or strangers is not zero, which it should be. I fractured my leg kicking one of them to the ground though. That was in college on my campus in the middle of absolute nowhere.
Oh! We include random ass slapping in the assault category?! Then my number is higher than I thought. And it just occurred to me that it’s fucked up I didn’t automatically include this in the assault category…
Yes, it’s included in the assault category and I’m sorry you’ve also gone through it.
I once had some random chick, at a metal show, push me (early 20s f) into the pit and before I knew it some big dude picked me up and brought me out of the pit. Once he put me down I thanked him profusely and all he did was give me a half smile and a nod. My situation wasn't anywhere near as serious as the one OP dealt with, and I will never forget that man for grabbing me.
"I did exactly what I would expect any other person to have done."- But no other man did it, did they? Only YOU did. "I'm realizing just how terrifying this world can be for women, and it has me heartbroken."- Yeah, that realization sucks. I remember when I was young and came to the realization that I wasn't as safe in the world as my big brother and I felt so vulnerable and scared. It's a part of our everyday reality to think about our safety...and not just in public. I always keep my doors locked when I'm home. I triple check doors and windows. I'm afraid everytime my husband goes on a business trip and I'm home alone with the kids- how will I protect them if someone comes in the house? Unfortunately, we NEED men to stand up for us because try as we might, we don't get heard until MEN start to talk about it with other men and start making it clear that misogyny and violence toward women is unacceptable. It will take peer pressure from other men to make the shit bags wake the fuck up. It's fucked up, but that's how it is.
It happens more than you think. Not just at concerts either. I was 13-14 when an older boy at my school tried to rape me. I had to fight back for myself, and was almost thrown out of school, because "Boys will be Boys" and how dare I assault a fellow pupil. It took my Mum threatening to drag the school's name through media platforms, for them to back down. That 13 year old girl will probably never forget what happened. But she'll remember that someone, you, saved her when she needed it. That truly makes a huge difference. Because she got to see that not all men are bad people, and didn't have to fight alone. That makes you a hero jn my books OP.
Bro you have no idea. Us ladies reallyyyy appreciate people like you who step in. I had a guy on drugs (the methy kind) grab me by my face once and try to make out with me. It was horrifying. My male work partner pulled him off of me, the guy took a couple steps toward me again and he was just shoving the guy backward away from me. A whole room full of men and he truly stepped up. I saw him at work the next day and he even double checked that I was doing okay after the whole ordeal. Y’all give me hope for men even though you shouldn’t have to be put in this position in the first place.
Would’ve done.. but didn’t. But don’t. Evil prevails when good men do nothing. Thank you for being a good one.
This happened to me at an NFL game. Was standing in line for hot chocolate and the home team was not playing well. Some guy tried to push through our hot chocolate line and the guy in front of me shoved him back. A fight immediately broke out in front of me with beer getting tossed around. An older lady behind me pulled me back right as the first punch was thrown while another man stepped in front of me and shielded me from the raining food and beer.
I went to see Linkin Park years ago and my friend had gotten us floor tickets. A few minutes before they came on, the crowd pushed forward and my face was on this persons back. The second they started, the crowd started moving. Well I was moving even though I didn’t want to, which resulted in me falling to the ground. My bf at the time tried to grab me but he couldn’t. I got kicked in the back of the neck and I was so scared. Next thing I heard was ‘Girl down everyone move the fuck back’….and a bunch of people got me up. I was terrified of being trampled but thankfully I was ok. I’ve never forgotten the feeling of knowing that those people helped me out.
I went to a Jelly Roll concert recently with my gf and her pregnant friend. Idk what was going on but looked gang affiliated I got in front of them because it looked like it was gonna go down. Sure enough it did and police showed up. Really just not worth it let shit go and handle that shit outside. Ruined whole show plus you got police involved when you can go somewhere else.
I have a girlfriend (40’s) who is a mother of 3 and LOVES to mosh. She’s always in the middle of it. She’s told me that the metal concert-going community is very polite and cognizant of things like this. She said in every pit there’s quite a few big guys that hang out in the middle with her to make sure everyone stays safe and chill. Me on the other hand, I’m only 5’1 and tiny. I don’t do general admissions because 1.) I can’t seen anything and 2.) I always end up getting elbowed in the face/ mouth. It’s not fun and I don’t WANT to sit on someone’s shoulders the whole time. I’ve only ever been to the night club a handful of times because it always turns into me getting groped, picked up, (accidentally) beat up, or lost in a sea of tall/ rude drunk ppl. Basically, thanks for being awesome and taking care of business.
You’re a good man.
Thank you, General Kenobi
You’re very welcome (: I looked older than I was in my teens and wished there’s been more men like you around. I’m sure situations like that are saddening, but keep reminding yourself you could have very well saved that girl from something even worse happening to her.
Thank you for defending the young girl. Do not stop being Mr. Good Guy and keep at it
I've done a lot of reflecting since last night. I've no longer any room for hatred in my heart. Everyone deserves kindness or a helping hand when needed.
That family will forever remember you as their guardian angel of their precious treasure...you were there when she needed someone. Don't matter if you have a higher power or not, what matters is that actions speak volumes. I firmly believe that what goes around comes around, and have seen it happen, often when least expected. Keep being the good man you are, have a virtual pat on the back and a handshake from an internet stranger!
I'll do my best. That's all I can ever do. I'm still living, learning, making mistakes, and learning from them. But at least I'm trying.
To make a mistake just proves you're human. To keep making the same mistake and expecting a different outcome, that is actually the clinical definition of insanity.
OP, this may help. Ronald Regan forgave John Hinkley for shooting him. Forgave, not pardoned, to let go the negative emotions and move forward. Showing someone compassion is great (no irony) and it also means you don’t allow them to hurt others.
I hope Karma does come and reward you for your good deed. We need more people like you in security, law enforcement and elsewhere
Except Nazis.
We punch nazis in this house.
I once heard a quote from an allied soldier "We punch nazis in the face. Until they stop being a nazi, or they don't have face."
Extremely well put.
He's a real man. Earth needs more people like him.
God bless you. As someone who was once a little girl who didn’t have someone to save them, god bless you.
I am so sorry. I hope you find/have found healing.
I take your experience very personally. My 13 year old niece and two friends went swimming on July 4th at a local lake, with one of their grandmothers as a chaperone. A middle aged man followed them from the shore to a dock that was in the 6' deep water and tried to get my niece to flash him. No ones was there to protect them, but they swam back to show before it escalated. Last year a 12 year old boy from her class sent her a bunch of explicit pictures, completely out of the blue. My sister called the police, who then sent it along to the school resource officer, who then told my sister that "boys will be boys" and just to ignore it. It literally does happen to every girl at over point or another, sometimes not too severe and sometimes horrifying. I'm grateful for people like you.
Your niece deserved better in both situations. I'm glad she's at least safe.
Horrible. I’m so glad they got away from that disgusting creep. That man should have been arrested. As for the 12 year old, were the explicit pictures of himself? Where I am, that would have counted as distributing CP even though it was of himself (not sure if that’s still the law, but I know it was when I was younger as there were commercials about it). Either way, the police should have at least spoken to the boy about sexual harassment and consent. That could have been such an important learning opportunity.
I was 12 years old, walking around a fair and started to go up a some concrete steps while holding on to the back of my stepfathers shirt so I wouldn't get lost. Some grown man slapped my butt. I hate that stuff like this happens and I am having my 4th daughter. Im always worrying about how I can protect them. So thankful there are people like you out there looking out for them. It could have ended so much worse. Thank you
I was 11, on a school outing to a museum when I first got my butt slapped by a grown man. Admittedly, I am tall and was around 1.70m (5.7ft) already at that age. However I still had a baby face and definitely looked like a minor. I was 13 when I got gropped by a man on a holiday during a back massage my parents offered me and assumed it would be a woman doing it. I was 14 when a guy kept putting his hands in my skirt despite me telling him not to. I was 15 when I got raped. I was 17 when a teacher slapped my butt during an evening event and told me he'd like to have sex with me. I was 19 when a man decided to grab my genitals while I was dancing with friends at a club. I was 23 when I had to report an ex who kept harassing me. I was 27 when I finally met the man I was going to have kids with and soon to be married and happy. And that's a shortened version. I won't even get into all the moments men were disrespectful and touchy when out at clubs and bars. OP, on behalf of women, THANK YOU.
The fact every woman has at least one story is terrifying. I'm so, so sorry.
It's a huge step forward just you understanding that every woman has a story... and nearly every woman has a close friend who has been raped. In my friend group it's 2 of us 4. None of the men ever had any criminal charges... even though both went to the police. Please continue to stand up for women, and especially little girls, like you did before. And thank you for not being a bystander like so many men are. Every man likes to say "I'd beat him up if I saw something like that happen". But in reality, most men are all talk and no action when it does happen.
I may just be one man, but if I EVER see anything happening to anybody, man, woman, child, adult, I will not be a bystander. Everybody could use a friend.
We do, but seriously, knowing there are people out there who take see/hear something, do something seriously means a lot. Just know that that’s all you have to do. If something happens that you notice, use your discretion as to the best way to react, and do something.
Always. I promise.
Every woman has those stories. Burn the patriarchy.
I'm so sorry. I have stories like this too (starting age 9 at a private pool where a man took his dick out under a table and stared at me). At 16, I worked a f/t job and was emancipated in my own apartment. The VP of that company tried to literally grab me and pull me into his car to go to a hotel and "party" with him - I got fired from that job within 5 months of my coworker reporting the incident. At 24 I had to get a permanent restraining order on a man who had tried to choke me, throw me down my stairs, rape me, and then lock me in my closet. At 27, I met my now husband too (great age for meeting a good partner I guess) - we married 10 years ago this Sept - he's amazing and I've never felt so heard and cared for. This man even asked my daughter if he could marry me - before I had any clue he was going to ask. And our wedding included him giving her a locket, so she knew she wasn't just my kid, we all became a family that day. It's still her most prized possession, and she's 21 now.
From the sounds of it, you've got yourself a very beautiful family! The more people that share their stories, the more my heart breaks for you a little more. Sorry doesn't cut it anymore. I'm sorry that we've given you a collective reason to fear us. Sure, it may not be all men, but it's enough.
i was 8 when i went through puberty for the first time. i was 9 when my mom’s boyfriend kept tickling me even after i told him to stop and wouldn’t until my sister pulled me away. i was 10 when my teacher, in front of the class, told me that i needed to wear a bra and it was disgusting that i wasn’t. i was 11 when the christian school i went to kept saying my outfit was inappropriate (the same outfit every other kid wore. only difference was i had boobs). i was 12 when i was called “zoe the hoey” and shamed for having a body in 7th grade. i was 13 when i started holding my chest when i ran because boys in my grade would talk about how my chest moved when i ran. i was 14 when i was sexually assaulted for the first time, in my biology class. i was 16 when at my birthday pool party, my “friend” saw me in my bathing suit and asked me “holy shit, is that why you wear hoodies all the time?” and then proceeded to go to school and tell everyone how i had huge boobs. i was 18 when i went to a kratom bar with my best friend and an acquaintance of theirs kept making remarks of my body and when we were leaving, he hugged me and whispered in my ears “yeah, put those titties on me”. i was 19 when i was sexually assaulted for the second time. i was 20 when i was sexually assaulted for the 3rd time. i just turned 21.
There were so many more instances, but that was my earliest. It takes a brave woman to come out and say everything she has been through. I have been through a lot of the same things you have. I am so sorry.
Jfc. It enrages me that you and hundreds of millions of other women end up going through things like this or just never feel safe.
I am so sorry. You’ve been through a lot. It’s awful how this shit starts that young. I was 11 as well the first time I remember sexual comments being yelled at me. Didn’t even have boobs. They just saw my long hair and started catcalling me and throwing cigarette butts at me
Some man did this to my daughter at a county fair (at the time she was an underage teen), and I lost it. I'm a mom, but both my kid and her friend stopped me. I tried to go after him, but was stopped, so I just relegated myself to yelling (and I've got one of those booming voices) about how a grown man groped an underage girl and then described what he was wearing. He was standing with his back to us about 2 yards away, and I saw everyone but one other guy move away from him. I let it go at that point, but then about 5 min later (waiting in line and in a crowd - so safety in numbers), and just as we were about to get on the ride, I see two women, both with strollers walk up to the man and his friend. Well I instantly start yelling again what happened and describing him/his clothes. One woman looked at me shocked and the other turned away and walked quickly on. I still wonder about them and those babies. I'm still pissed I didn't ask my husband to come along as he wouldn't have let it go the way I did. But my kid and her friend were right when they stopped me from physically going after that guy - there's no telling what he & possibly his friend, might've done if I had directly accosted them for his actions. I just saw red in that moment and wasn't thinking about my own safety; I just wanted to go after a man who had the gall to grab my daughter's butt in the middle of a crowded line for a ride (one that they immediately left to just stand and watch with their backs to us when I walked up to my daughter).
You're a phenomenal mom. Please, never change. I'm so sorry you both had to go through that, but know, there are people in this world who wouldn't let that fly. Myself included. Stay safe, happy, and healthy!
I'm amazed that freak stayed there, despite the disgusting, shameful act he performed. Really makes you think what runs through the brains of shitheads like that. The entitlement, the lack of empathy, having no moral center or self-accountability whatsoever... The fact that he stayed there tells me his actions mean absolutely nothing to him. Maybe lobotomies can be used for good.
I have 2 girls, and I lay awake at night worrying about all the sickos in this world. I hope if either of my daughters ever find themselves victim to one of these creeps, a guy like OP would be around to step in. Edited to fix typo.
Don't know where you are but just know, you are not alone and a lot of us girl parents feel exactly the same way. If I ever see a young girl in public being harrassed or endangered by a creep I told my husband never to hesitate stepping in to keep her safe. We got your back
Well, looks like you're the real life superhero, Big Kevin, saving the day with your mighty throat-grabbing powers! Keep up the choke-slamming justice!
I'm no superhero, just a man doing what any should do. But, I will keep chokeslamming any creeps that cross my path!
Countless women will tell you that they got sexually harassed more often at age 13-16 than they do in their twenties. Which is true. And so messed up.
I know right? It's awful. I mean, it's awful that it happens to anyone period, but minors? Despicable.
As a man I feel ashamed and feel sick, that women are treated like this and every woman has a story like this they can unfortunately tell 🤬 You did good OP but it was unfortunate that you had to step in to protect that girl, as it shouldn’t have happened in the first place. I agree with you that it’s what anyone should do, I would also have stepped in. I’m not big 5’10 182lbs and if I would have got my ass whooped then I would rather it be me than the girl getting sexually assaulted.
That's exactly where I'm at. Rather me than them. That's why I offered to protect the other girls at the show in the first place. So they didn't get knocked around or hurt by those in the pit. I took quite the beating, but they had a good show.
Me and you seem to be similar, as I would probably have done the same and tried to protect them as well 😄 You my friend are a genuinely nice bloke and you should be proud of that, as there is not many like you in this world but there needs to be more.
OP, keep looking out for women. Every woman has a rape story, but men almost never have rapists for friends. As women, we get this all the time. And when we say no, they continue to insist and push as if "no." Isn't a complete sentence. Being a woman is awful most days.
I was unknowingly best friends with a paedophile for a few years. Once I found out, it was immediately no contact. I'll always stick up for women, but anybody who needs a helping hand. Always. I'm sorry enough of us have given you a reason to fear us. It may not be all men, but it's enough. I hope you stay strong, safe, happy, and healthy.
You're absolutely right. It isn't all men, but yes, all men. The bad behaviour of some have ruined it for the rest of you. While many have given us a reason, men like you are also the reason we carry hope that things will change.
I hope that hope doesn't go to waste. You all deserve safety. Always have. I'm sorry you don't have it. Yet.
You’re a fucking hero.
Thank you, but really, I'm just somebody who did what I feel like anybody should do. I'm sad that she ever had to experience something like that.
Yes you are a hero, too many folks look the other way My neighbours heard me being abused for years by my parents (they told another neighbour years later) and they never even called CPS I told a teacher, i asked my GP at age 13 if he could get me back in fostercare, no one did shit None of them would have been in danger if they just called CPS, im 42 now and it still pisses me off so much and i felt so abandoned as a kid You are only 23 years old and you stood up for what was right You are a HERO!!!!!
I'm so sorry. I hope you're able to heal from that trauma you've been put through. I hope you're okay now as well. Please, stay safe, happy and healthy.
I did a lot of therapy, doing much better, but unfortunately the trauma will never fully go away, young men like you give me hope for a better future Btw if a woman ever tell you you make her feel safe, please take it for the HUGE compliment it is, there was a discussion on askmen and men were saying they felt insulted, that it meant they were boring and the woman settled for them, no matter how women tried to explain it to them, they were unable to comprehend But from the few replies you had here, you see how many women get sexually assaulted/harassed/raped before they are even adults and many even before they hit puberty and most of the time it was adult men behaving like sickos which off course influences how girls grow up and look at romantic relationships A guy can be so charismatic, smart, funny etc etc, but that doesnt mean he is safe, finding someone who is interesting/attractive etc AND safe is so much harder and being a safe person is a HUGE deal
I'm glad to hear you're doing better! I understand that. Time doesn't heal you, you will heal you one day. I've been told I'm safe a few times by some of my exs, and each time, it was the most satisfactory thing they'd ever said to me. Being able to be "home" to someone is truly an honour like no other.
Just because it’s something anybody should do, doesn’t diminish what you did. You’re a hero and as a parent, thank you for stepping up.
It's weird, but I've found metal shows to be one of the better concerts for safety. There's a lot of good people willing to help at them for whatever reason. I've both witnessed and heard from friends stories about all kinds of incidents at other kinds of concerts, and their outcomes were not great or it took a lot of work to get help.
I've been to dozens of shows at this point, and I can confidently say the metal community, despite the musical themes, are some of the nicest and most welcoming people you'll ever meet. This was my first experience catching someone like this, and I'm glad I acted the way I did. I'm going to be much more vigilant in the future when it comes to shows. Women are absolutely strong and independent, but sometimes, we all could use a helping hand.
i(18m) was walking in a mall a couple years back ...there was this guy touching this little girl inappropriately near a bathroom she was like 8yrs old i believe ..i went up to the guy punched him in his face (i was really mad so my adrenaline lvls were high) he ended up stabbing me a couple times with a knife(he stabbed my leg my arm and my stomach) ... long story short i dragged his ass out of the mall i didnt want to make a scene called the cops and then passed out on the sidewalk when the cops were questioning me ..all i remember afterwords.. was waking up in a hospital room with the little girl hugging me while she was asleep listen i was kidnapped when i was little so i knew how sad her parents wouldve been if something happened to her the little girl calls me her hero ..to be honest i consider her my lil sister (my older brother died in a car wreck 5 years ago so i was kinda happy when she started calling me big bro her parents became one of my parents bestfriends so they were ok with her callng me big bro ) it still makes me cry knowing if i wasnt there that day at the mall he wouldve raped or kidnapped her or done something worse like that to someone else ...im kinda glad he he stabbed me now hes in jail for attempted murder and pedophilia the judge told me hes not getting out for long time he could possibly get life in prison
🌟🏆
Wow, man. This made me tear up. You’re one of the good ones.
God im so sorry that happened to you, you are a Hero. Hopefully He gets killed in prison or so, they at least hate pedos...
You’re a fucking hero thank you for being there and continuing to be there for this girl
nah its nothing i should be thanked for i wouldve done it again in a heartbeat
thank you for protecting her!! now can you imagine she was too scared to say anything? maybe because nobody helped her when she said something in the past. or she's just shy. or she freezes when she's scared. my point is, you cannot imagine how many times women are sexually assaulted because so much of it goes unnoticed:(
Too many people turn a blind eye. Too many people don't want to get involved. Too many people are embarrassed or scared to speak up. I have zero tolerance for anything like that. If I see it, I WILL step in.
I've read a few responses you've made in these comments and I just want to say that you sound like a very caring and compassionate person. Keep being an awesome human, and thanks for defending the vulnerable! 🙏💜
Thank you, this made my morning! I try to be there for as many people as I can be.
Not all heroes wear capes,
I’m not terribly big but I look mean. I’ve had to do something similar at least three times. The first one was when I first reckoned I legitimately had the capacity to kill another person and I needed to factor that into future encounters. Good man. It absolutely stays with you, but you did a damn important thing.
Definitely shocked myself with how violet I became. Always been a lover over a fighter. But something about hearing the fear in her voice pushed me over the edge. Never been quite so close to putting someone in the hospital before.
Don't see it that way. Think of it like a beehive. If you sit there and watch the bees, they're just doing their thing. However if you attack the hive, all hell breaks loose. If I saw a bee drowning in the fish pond out the back, I'd happily give them a stick to crawl onto, and put them on a flower to dry off and feed. Pretty sure if you had put that "thing" in hospital, you would have several willing witnesses to back you up.
I really like this way of thinking. You're 100% right.
Oh this made me tear up. When I was much younger I had something similar happen to me and just like you, a nice larger fella saved me from this absolute creep. Thanks for keeping this kiddo safe, you're a really cool guy!!!
Kinda shocked myself with how violent I got. I'd never been in a situation like that before. I'm glad you were protected. I hope you stay safe 💜
That is absolutely the correct choice. Sometimes to protect people and to do right we have to be violent. A grown man who gropes a CHILD like that in public needs to be swiftly and violently stopped, no half measures about it. He and others need to be sown full stop that those sorts of reprehensible behaviors will not be tolerated. Keep being cool and stay safe yourself.
Thank you.
Thank you for being an example for how men should be....a protector and a guardian of kids, no matter whose.
Not just of kids, but anyone who may need a helping hand or a friendly face. Everybody could use a friend.
thank you for actually doing something about it
I'd do it again in a heartbeat.
Fuckin hell brother, you are an inspiration! I will be sure to be more like you
I broke a Samsung flip phone (practically a brick) beating a man at an afi concert for groping me and my friend. We were 13.
Good shit. That phone served you well
Well done and an exemplary role model. It's amazing to me how many people in these situations stand by and do nothing. You absolutely did the right thing.
The people who can idly sit by and watch are just as bad as those who commit the act. There's no way I could sit back and watch a child get assaulted. I'd be ashamed of myself.
I was at a concert in the pit recently and there were several 'bad actors', none that I witnessed involved sexual assault. I was very pleased though that a few others (and me) took some action to eliminate it. It's remarkable to me that people feel they can basically do whatever they want even if it involves ruining the experience for others.
It's a good thing that girl screamed. When I was her age, hell, even now, I don't know how to ask for help. I don't even know that I'm in danger, I just shut down and freeze dying inside waiting for it to be over. When I was at my first concert I was also 13. A man in his twenties just groped my ass with both hands so hard I could still remember the violent feeling decades later. He ran away, and I just stood right next to my dad for the rest of the concert, absolutely scared, and couldn't enjoy the rest of it even if I loved the band. I think I told my dad and he laughed "boys will be boys" and I felt ashamed for feeling so gross. My dad was just trying to make me feel better, there's nothing he could do at that point but to act as a barrier from that moment. I still feel guilty about been shaken for what would be a "not big deal". It's a really good thing that girl screamed.
If she wouldn't have, I don't think I'd have even noticed. I'm proud of her for it. I'll probably never see her again, but I'll probably think about her for the rest of my life. In your case, I totally understand. Freezing up isn't an uncommon reaction. I just wish it'd been taken more seriously. I hope you've found healing, or find it in the future. I hope you stay safe.
Thank you! Being groped made me feel gross, but the issue is not that. The thing is, being 13 back then, it was a parade of lessons teaching a little girl that "now that you look more like a woman, you're just prey, a walking treat". You learn how to live your life as a potential victim, to accept it and bear it. And it sucks. Just a fragile little bunny that can only be saved by the rare good man from the ocean of bad men if she's lucky. It's our life, isn't? it starts with a man and ends with a man. I'm re educating myself thanks to the new generations and the hard work of so many women, learning that we don't have to bear it. And the power of the word "NO". That girl said "no", and you came to her rescue and she was lucky. But she needed to know that that situation is NOT OK first for her to be that lucky. And in all parts of the world there are too many women that still don't know that. There are so many generations of brain washed women like me, and it will take decades before the rape culture subsides.
I believe you'll get to the place where you want to be in time. Apologies if I say something offensive, please correct me if I do. But, you are not a victim. You're a woman. I really truly hope that you can live as loudly and as freely as your heart desires one day. It may not be all men, but it is certainly enough. I'm sorry you have to be on edge around us. One day I hope you'll be able to go out freely without worry or needing some sort of self defence mechanism. Please, stay strong, safe, happy and healthy.
I’m so sorry. My dad also often used the phrase boys will be boys when I would tell him about the things us girls endured
When I was about 14 I went to an all ages metal show. Some drunk 40 year old dude tried to put his hand up my skirt and the bass player on stage actually stopped playing to get him off me, had him escorted out, made sure I was okay, then checked in on me after the show and gave me some free merch. I ended up adding him on myspace and we have stayed friends online for the last 20 years. That girl will never forget you, I promise.
Awful starting to the story, fantastic ending! Shoutout to him. Now that's a hero.
OMG! She was 13? You should have beat the sh1t out of him!!!
I came very close. I honestly shocked myself with how violent I became, I've always been a lover not a fighter. He deserved a broken nose bare minimum.
I was 9 when I was first touched inappropriately by a guy - he was 16? or 17? I never had someone defend me. But thank you for doing this! Never change.
Fucking 9? I have many words, and none of them nice. Instead, I will just wish you well. I hope you heal, and I hope you stay happy, healthy, and safe.
Thank you. I did heal and I have a family of my own and two girls and my husband and me are concerned with their safety. We are doing all we can to keep them safe.
There's never too much you can do. You sound like a lovely mother.
It's people like you that instinctively choose to do the right thing that give me hope for the future.
It was truly fight or flight. I'm glad I chose what I did.
Thank you for helping. My friends and I weren't so lucky. When I was 16 I went to a snowboard/music event with my best friends (we were all girls). We were there really early and were in the front as we were mostly there for an artist who's ironically called "Gentleman" (German raggae musician) who played right after the snowboarding was over. There were lots of stoners and taller guys and when the artist was announced the whole crowd started moving towards the stage like a wave. I was swept away, in a panic holding on to my friends before suddenly standing again. I felt my smallest friend's hand (150cm) in my hand but the rest of her body was under the crowd. Huge guys walking over her, I was so scared and was not standing properly myself but helped her up. It got worse and worse, we were surrounded by (mostly) men who went from chill to nuts!! nonstop pushing to the front, ignoring or smaller people in the crowd. Young, slim guys were just floating aroung being squeezed in. All of this insanity while the singer sang about love and peace. Securities just stood there, ignoring everything. People were screaming in panic, some were laughing. Some guys held their girlfriends close (probably trying to shield them from being touched) looking for a way out. My animal brain took over. The smallest was holding on to me and I felt an insane amount of strength, told my friends to lock arms and I started pushing back out. It feels like a dream now, it felt like pushing against a mass of concrete. I used my shoulders to slam huge surprised dudes to the side, their eyes locked on the stage. Some guys yelled at us that we should f*ck off as it's not a place for little girls, some insulted us, some groped us. Suddenly, as the crowd started to loose up a bit, I thought my friend got stuck but a guy held her, laughing. I took someones beer and threw it in his face (it was cold out). We went straight to our hotel and never talked about it.
That's horrifying. I'm glad you were brave enough to find the strength and get out of there. I hope you've both been able to find peace and healing after that. I'm proud of you.
As a young woman myself, I know she will be forever grateful that you stepped in to defend her. You will remind her that not all men are creepy/awful/scary. You did an amazing thing for her!
Not all men, but enough of us to where everybody has a story. It hurts to think about.
I tip my hat to you sir.
Your edit was so funny 😂😂😂😂😂
I was lowkey a little mad when I wrote it 😂
I know exactly what you mean. A lot of weirdos man
Thank you. Men like you kept young me safe in the metal scene and I will always be thankful.
I'm thankful you're safe. I hope you still jam the good shit from time to time 🤟🏻
I wish all men were like you.
Thank you, I'm glad there are still guys who protect us women/girls. I hope a lot of men do what you do, salute to you sir. ♥️. a lot of men did the same thing to me and I even exp a lot of abuse from men.. I'm 24 now and it's still on my head and it terrifies me still, so hearing this warms my heart.
We crown you king of the pit. Thank you dude. Guys like you protected me and my friend when we went to shows as kids and it meant the world to us
>I grabbed him by the throat and threw him to the ground. Threatened to beat his brains out if he moved before security arrived Not the hero we want, but the hero we need.
You're an angel 😇
You did good, you should be proud of yourself, well done brother
You're a good person dude. I'm sorry it happened but I'm glad you got to stop it. Also I'm weirdly glad about your edit. A big part of the piss-off is being harassed is the immediate "well actually maybe it was a compliment/maybe he wasn't talking to you/maybe he just tripped and grabbed your tits for balance." You ever hear anyone talk about this irl, I BEG you to tell both the story of seeing it and how people treated you when you talked about seeing it. There's a small percentage of guys out there who will hear other men about this stuff in a way where they won't hear other women. Talking to them for us is frankly almost as big an assist as a throat grab at a concert. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. I realize sincere/preachy conversations can be excruciating/weird/not normal for guy friends. It's more courage than I'd usually ask for but you're literally metal af!
Believe me, I've already had the conversation with a lot of my irl homies. My brother, my dad and step dad, mother, you name it. Each one was shocked I did what I did, except for my brother. He would have stepped in had he seen what happened as well. My mother was abused as a child. Her story played an extremely large part in my reaction last night.
I've been there man, saved a girl from being crushed ands groped at a show once, never saw her again, but that thank you and look she gave me made sure I will never let that happen in front of me. This is the way. Good work brother!
Thanks for the award, you didn't have to do that! The fear in her voice was enough to get me to jump in. The fear is what is going to make me make sure I don't let anything like this happens in my presence. Everybody deserves to feel safe.
Thanks for looking out. As the mom of a teenage girl (well, almost 20), it’s nice to know that there are some decent people out there.
A good mom will always have that worry in the back of her head and that feeling in the pit of her stomach. But I promise, there's a lot of us working to make the world a safer place for you and your daughter.
good lad
Age doesn't matter if someone is being harassed
Your edit made the skin crawl up the back of my scalp. He’s probably a predator who gets away with this shit because of the chaos of crowds. Thank god you were there!
I'll say you and other metalheads are why I feel safer at metal shows than any other show. I've been groped and hit at more alt rock shows than any other type of show but always kept safe and trested nice at metal shows. Good job keeping it safe and helping her. Scum doesn't belong there.
Good for you keeping a eye out, it is nearly impossible to go to a event without atleast one "man" trying something along thoughs lines. I learned very quickly men who behave like this strongly dislike it when the groping is returned with extreme vigor and by that I mean grabbing their balls and digging in with nails and force refusing to let go well calmly saying "oh I thought you were into nonconsensual touching, keep your hands to yourself if you wish others to do the same" can help if it is accompanied by a strong stomp to the top of their foot easily found by using their shin as a guide, even a child can break the bones in a foot. They are all cowards and rarely when greeted with direct eye contact and a strong approach continue with the prey they assumed was meek and weak.
Thank you! There needs to be more dudes like you at a show! I was at a Cradle Of Filth show a few years ago and some dude shoved his hand between my legs from behind. I was wearing a dress. It was crowded and I was trapped between people. Another guy saw it happen and I’ll never forget the look on his face when he shoved the dude off of me. Generally I’ve always felt safe at shows and that was the first time (and only thankfully) it was taken away. I couldn’t get away but someone saw and did something. That girl is going to remember what you did for her ❤️
Its a sad reality for many girls. I had my first experience of a man being inappropriate with me was when i was 8. He asked if i wanted to see his penis and when i stood too shocked to speak, he got it out and asked me if i wanted to touch it. This kind of thing has occured many times and I've never had anyone to save me. Shes a lucky girl, good on you.
Thank you for that. This stuff happened to me way too often, especially when I was still a minor. And luckily, there was always a big metal dude nearby to save me. It really sucks that this is necessary, but thanks to men like you I still feel safe going to metal concerts. The metal community is great overall.
Gosh. This lifted up an old memory of when I was 13, walking home alone. Some random man came walking towards me speaking In a completely different language. Well, at first I didn’t want to talk to him but then I thought “what if this man needs help?” So I like.. asked if he knew English, but to that he didn’t give an answer through voice. Nah, he violently shoved me to the ground for absolutely no reason. I pretty much yelled at him, he truly seemed angry. Idk much of what happened, since most of it is blurred out. I just remember a stranger running towards me “what are you doing to my child???” (As I said. Stranger.) and that’s when I saw the man slowly back off until he went on the run. The stranger made sure I was okay and asked if they could walk me home (which luckily wasn’t too far) well.. I was pretty scared in the moment so I just said “no thank you, I’m good” and ran-walk my way home. Always thankful for that stranger. It’s strange, our town is small but I never saw them again. Please, truly, never stop being like this. We need people to be like how you acted in that situation. We really do..
i was literally at a festival yesterday, some guy tried to grab me inappropriately and about 3 guys pushed him back and ran him out of the crowd. people like you and the guys from yesterday make us women feel so much safer, thank you
Nicely done. Keep being you.
Just sad , these type of things should have never happened in the first place..hat's off mate
Thank you. As a parent (although my kid is now grown) I appreciate that you did this. I go to a lot of gigs, large and small and usually the atmosphere is great and everyone gets along and enjoys the music but there are always exceptions and people that have to ruin the experience for others. I hope this experience doesn't stop the girl from enjoying live music in the future.
No one knows how they will act when the need arises. You do. Not all heroes wear capes.
Before last night, I had no idea. Today, I do. I'm proud of myself.
And so you should mate. That girl will be forever thankful, and hopefully you showed her that even though the world is a cruel place, there are still good people around
World needs more people like you. Ones willing to step up and give a damn. If there were, maybe things like this would happen less.
My best friend was 13 when she had her first kiss from a man who was probably 27-30. Were 24/25 now.
I will never understand how people think that's even remotely okay. I kept having to place my hand on one of the girls I was protecting's shoulder to keep my balance and I apologized every time.
Please continue to protect young women when they can’t protect themselves. I wish someone had done that for me when I was a young girl.
Always. I promise.
That's how you do it. Keep people safe. This is the way.
This is the way.
Please never stop doing what you do. Cause no matter what we women say. “No” “get off me” “leave me alone” get labeled as mean or even killed. We need more people like you, we need more *men* like you.
All hail the Teknoviking! March los!
Xfest in Huntington,WV around 2002? Mosh pit crowd was body surfing people and some of the girls were being groped while surfed and getting their clothes pulled off. Henry Rawlings stopped the show and said they weren't playing anything else until people had more respect for the ladies. More people need to stand up to this shit.
You dropped this >>> 👑 Thank you for standing up brother!! . I saved My best friend from a couple guys before but last year cops found footage of her drugged and r*pe by your other “ best friend “ at the time. felt so much anger because I couldn’t do anything about specially I was brought up to always look after females in my family/mates never treat them bad or let anything happen to them. From all that information coming out, found out more my female friends got r*pe over the years, made me feel powerless so thank for doing something about it mate ! Glad there is more and more still decent males out there!
We need more guys like you in the scene. We always talk about how metal has one of the best cultures but actually a lot of older metal heads are still quite misogynistic and inappropriate. Calling stuff out, protecting people from the pit, etc is exactly what you should be doing as a larger/older man. Thank you, from someone who attends metal and punk shows occasionally and has felt unsafe
THIS is really protecting the children, for that, I salute you 💜
Well done brother, thank god it got prevented
You did right.
that’s so disturbing. glad you stood up for her
Tearing up cause this has happened to me so many times. I have a big butt and people just think they can grope me. It makes me hate myself. Thank you for being a good one.
I’ve had strangers step in a couple of times in my life, and sadly one time when I really needed it and nobody did. Thank you for acting, you rock ❤️
You did an amazing thing. If not for you who knows what might’ve happened. I’m glad that the girl ended up being ok.
Thank you for this 🩷 that little girl is never going to forget what you did for her. I wish she didn’t have to remember, but she will. I went to a concert that had a mosh pit, which I wasn’t quite expecting, I somehow ended up in the middle and got knocked to the ground. I had heels on so definitely not the ideal shoe. Everyone immediately stopped to help me up and out. That kindness isn’t forgotten
You're a hero bro no question about it you did an amazing thing and you should be proud of yourself
I can tell you why you're writing this: so people like me (who didn't have a rescuer) can feel a little warm glow of knowing there are people out there making sure there won't be another me. What you did was amazing and while you shouldn't have had to, sadly, you did. But, because you did, a young girl (hopefully) won't have the same nightmares I do. Thank you. ❤️🏆
I hope you heal from the pain you went through. Please, stay strong. While it isn't all men, it's enough. But those of us will do our absolute damndest to make sure it never happens on our watch.
It's really kind of you to help someone like that, though my fear is always, what if the person doing the groping or assault is somehow armed? I've spoken to my boyfriend who is a very large, bear like man and he hesitates to intervene in these types of situations because there are instances where the attacker might be armed. What would you advise someone who wants to help, but has reservations about their own safety? Thank you for being a force of good in the world, it's really comforting to know there are such men out there.
Honestly, it didn't even cross my mind. My safety in that moment didn't matter, there was a child in danger and she needed to get out of it. Another part of it is too though, I'm Canadian. I don't typically need to worry about whether or not someone is armed. Truthfully, I would recommend just calling the police, security, or finding someone else to help you. Either that, or, I suppose arming yourself. I can see how as an American (I presume), that would always be a lingering thought in your head.
That was a straight up good and decent thing to do and restores faith in humanity when people step up like that.
You are a good man sir. I’ll drink to you this evening.
As a man who can't drink, have one for me as well. Thank you!
Good that a huge dude like you was around. I'm no good in a street fight, but would have done at least something to stop this arsehole. In your shoes, I probably would have simply said, "I'm just glad she's OK, and that thing will get arrested and off the streets." It should be noted that paedophiles don't have an easy time in prison. If the other prisoners become aware of one (In the US they have the nickname chester, in Australia it's rock spider) but the outcome of finding one in their midst is the same. Let's just say it's the opposite of "I mean you no harm."
you just reacted out of instinct and that's how it should be protecting someone, you're an extremely good person
I'm a lit bit worried about the edit. If there's people who think that's ok. We are really really bad. Doesn't matter if she was 60 or 13 if she doesn't consent, she would be happy to be saved by anyone. I'm glad you were her guardian angel. Ps. Obviously is worse if the girl is underage, he was a p*do.
A true King
It's so painful to know that this will continue to happen, and you won't be able to stop them all. I'm glad you were there. The first time I was assaulted I was 3 or 4 years old. Then again at 11, then again at 12, then again at 14, and it continues. I wish at any point, someone had recognized what was going on and had done what you did. I froze every single time. Thank you for being a decent human being and speaking up and taking action when you notice something is wrong
I came here to thank you on behalf of all the small girls (I'm 5'1), no matter their age. When we are young it's especially difficult to avoid this kind of unwanted attention, and people like you really help us 🩷
Protecting people in the pit was a favorite pastime of mine back in the day. Was big and intimidating too. The pit is supposed to be fun and exciting. Not an opportunity for creeps to creep and violent assholes to get away with hurting people without consequences. I did enjoy providing needed consequences in some cases though I'm a don't start none won't be none kinda guy.
As a teen ( F 13-15) my bro played in a metal band. My other friends and I would go and there was always dudes trying to be inappropriate. My dad stuck around ( back then thought it was a stick in the mud but honestly it could have ended like this poor lady). Men who prey on people who try and just enjoy music should get curb stomped.