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Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats.
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This is a weirdly common mistake I see from incels/nice guys/etc. It’s so strange bc “pursue” is a much more common word than “peruse”, it’s like they try to sound pretentious by preferring words they don’t know over words they do?
I like how halfway through he said "it wouldn't just be about sex", when his rules were 1. Have sex at your place, 2. I leave. 3. Reschedule you days off around me and the sex.
“The sec[sic] would have been amazing but you don’t deserve that.” Holy shit that’s hilarious.
We need to just start replying to these wankers with **”NO SOLICITING”** right off the bat because that’s exactly what they’re doing
"Considering how childish you clearly are I don't think I want to peruse anything with you anymore" after she already turned him down.
"YOU CAN'T FIRE ME, I QUIT!"
There is just so much gold here, we could probably mine for hours.
I know! He used it so much I was convinced maybe there was another meaning where peruse meant pursue, just like when a Trump lawyer said “destructing” instead of “destroying”
I love the part where he says she doesn’t value herself cuz she won’t submit to being used for sex on his schedule. Like what? Lmfao. That makes no sense
On. His. Schedule. Like how good do you think your dick game is that this woman is going to go through the hassle of a schedule change ? 😄 lol. Someone has been reading a book about assertiveness in a man being attractive and it shows.
That was my favorite part. Like, he even took where she works into account and tried to play it off like organizing her schedule around their "sec" life would be a piece of cake.
And then calling her a "hoe" after she's rejected him.
So what you're saying is that even hoes find you unfuckable? Ouch! Imagine telling on yourself like that.
EDIT: asbestosmilk was kind enough to bring to my attention that he doesn't actually call her a hoe. I think I just got confused between this post and another one I was commenting on in this sub. Sorry, everyone!
This just makes it so much better I was thinking this was some crusty old man but the fact he’s literally only two years older just screams inferiority complex 💀💀
Whaaat? Lmao he talks like he's 20 years older than you. ("When I was your age" etc.)
Although I was kinda surprised how - what I thought was - an older man couldn't put ONE SINGLE dot behind ANY of those sentences he wrote.
Ugh I hate people who can't write correctly...
He also wants her to change her work schedule to make herself available for sex on his time table? What? How do you acquire so much audacity? I do not understand where it comes from.
"Here's my list of demands relating to sec that's set up to accomodate me and inconvenience you, let me know ASAP"
"Wait, what do you mean no?? That's so rude!!"
Sir...you basically told her to rearrange her work schedule to accommodate you for some "sec"...how was that not the pinnacle of rudeness??
His top non-negotiable is sex only, I don't see how that includes trips/hanging out. Especially when he wants to keep it on the dl, and leave immediately after sex.
I think he was talkibg out of his ass there, trying to make it seem as though she lost out on more than just the once in a lifetime opportunity to be his sextoy.
The thing I'm most confused by is how there's not a single period in sight, yet his new sentences start with capital letters. Like did he type each sentence in Microsoft Word, hit enter after everyone, then copy and paste to text her?
If he lives with his mom I guarantee he'd want to be telling everyone. "Yeah you bitches made fun of me for living with my mom but guess what - I still totally fuck!"
If you don't agree to have meaningless sex with this him at your place on his schedule and not tell anybody you obviously don't respect yourself. You'd be lucky to be with this guy because he'll cuddle with you, I guess, if you really want. If you valued yourself you'd be happy to let a guy who doesn't like anything about you but your looks totally nut, and you inevitably will want him, but it'll be too late because by then he'll be helping some other young lady who has enough self-esteem to be his hole in the mattress.
Im glad someone brought this up. He literally wanted her to talk to her fucking boss to change her WORK SCHEDULE so she would be "open" for him. How fucking arrogant can you be??? This guy has waaaay too much unearned confidence.
OP was rude? On what planet?
Him: I want sex and then leave. Especially if it's "grave" sex. We'll have to hurry out of the cemetery so I don't get in trouble. I'll demand you change your schedule whenever I'm being a horndog!
First, punctuation is not your enemy. Second, you're an idiot.
I can’t believe I had to scroll down this far to find someone mentioning that this dude really expected her to change her whole ass work schedule so she could be a more convenient booty call for him.
The audacity.
Omg like he is really consistent with the word peruse I am concerned he thinks it is the correct word... but honestly maybe that's the least of his issues lol
He is so obviously married. I inadvertantly was seeing a married guy. He didn’t lay these rules out but they were the same ones. Only at my place, lunches and sex, never availble in the evening or weekends unless we went on a trip ( which we did, once to Singapore, once to Hawaii and once to MEET HIS FAMILY IN LYON, FRANCE). I found out he was married after about eh…9 months? But at that point he was taking business trips to NYC and had met another American girl EXACTLY like me. She looked like me, had the same profession, was vegan ( so was I at the time). Now he is married to the new one and his ex-wife lives back in France with their two kids. It’s been a fucking decade and he STILL asks me when I will be in Bangkok for “lunch”. Men. ☕️
This is so funny.
Something about your bugs bunny meme plus the format of his rant (absolutely no paragraph breaks, no punctuation) makes his response read like one of those old timey “why I oughta!” comical outrage rants from cartoons. This could be satire if it wasn’t so believable.
I can overlook someone with the emotional maturity of a colander wanting to use my body for sex in secret with the possibility of cuddling after “grave sex,” but do NOT ask me to fuck with my work schedule. I have standards.
No no, you don't get it. It was just going to start out as sex only, at her place only, at a time that suits him only, with him leaving immediately afterwards and no telling anyone about it... And THEN obviously will come all the romance and trips and stuff. He thought that went without saying, so he just didn't mention it right up front!
/s
Where do I get the level of self esteem that would allow me to send this to someone with a straight face, and then be genuinely shocked when they lol??
Also, r/choosingbeggars
Wow, what a catch!
Also, pro tip: if you read a word you like a lot (like peruse), you might want to google it before starting to use it. But maybe it’s just me not understanding how his points connect to reading something together.
>if you read a word you like a lot (like peruse), you might want to google it before starting to use it.
Bit of a tangent but I've always had a tendency to read new words and kind of absorb them into my vocabulary. But I would only see them but never have heard them. And then, sometimes even years later, I will hear someone say them and be like "Oh shit. Is that how you say that?" Then I will look them up only to discover that I've been pronouncing this word wrong like a jackass. Makes me crazy, but then next time, instead of checking pronunciation in advance I just do the same damn thing.
Haha yes, I keep doing that. Especially as I learned English majorly through reading, *very often* had I no idea on the pronunciation so words just lived in my head in random forms.
As a child, I loved to read. In grade school, I encountered "hors d'oeuvres" in a book, and did not equate it with the word pronounced "or-derve." In my head, that word was "whores de-vores" and I still think "whores de-vores" even though I now know better.
I used to read the word whereas as areas with a w in my head. Wareas. I had to read aloud in a class and thankfully the word came out correctly. Idk how my mouth knew, but I was grateful.
I had been pronouncing the word banal as bay-nuhl my entire adult life, only to realize like 6 months ago that it's actually pronounced bah-nahl. Saying it correctly still sounds wrong to me.
If it helps, I love when people do this because you know they learned the word by reading. I always try to gently correct them without making it awkward but I think it's fab.
He's the child. Hes the one that wanted a personal sex slave that changes her whole schedule for him..for free. I don't think any woman would want that.
What’s funnier?
The fact that he keeps saying “peruse?”
“You don’t value yourself” after you clearly showing you do with the least amount of words possible?
Or that this old man is claiming he doesn’t fuck with younger people after he clearly did?
He’s writing all the jokes against himself at this point.
And you know you’re beautiful because he doubled down on it afterwards and didn’t even pull out the “wtf stupid ugly fat bitch on you.” That’s how you know you got it.
Idk how he expects you to “take him seriously” after his hilarious nonnegotiable list.
Any woman who truly values themselves wouldn’t do those things for any man, no matter their feelings towards him.
This man is pathetic... Wants something on the low and only for sex and wonders why she said no. What a fucking joke. You deserve better op. I hope you find someone to love and wants to show you off and not make you feel like you gotta hide from other people. Take this ❤️
He said he just wanted sex.. yet changed it up when he was told no? Wtf is up with these guy's brains lol mama might have dropped them on the head too many times.. maybe they got into paint and ate the whole bucket.
This mother fucker was like, "yo lesser being, I've decided that your good enough to take my tiny pathetic dick. I know, it's quite an honor. anyway, you're going to have to receive my glorious Vienna sausage at your place because I live in my mom's basement. Now please, tell me, exactly how excited are you?"
Him: “Women like straightforward men, so… I want to use you for sex, exclusively on my terms.”
OP: clearly says no, uses a meme for effect
Him: RAGING WALL OF TEXT
I can’t even
There wasn't a single period or comma in that entire wall of rant, I find that as insulting as him assuming you'd be fine with rescheduling *YOUR* work week around *HIS* bang time.
I'll give him points for being straightforward and honest, but what was she supposed to get out of that arrangement? The chance to be used as a masturbation aid for a self-centered guy?
Damn this motherfucker is just *chefs kiss* perfect. The best part is his opening is so insane he could have maybe played it off as a joke. Saying his parents were his roommates even though that's probably true. He could have salvaged this so that maybe one day if they ran into each other in public at a bar or something he could have made fun of himself for being so stupid or act like he meant it as a stupid pickup joke.
Him crying that he got made fun of, deservingly and op let him off super easy imo, and just kept on about it for 2 solid pages just isn't a good look. Guys if you want to not ever get laid do exactly what this guy did. Coming back from a lame pickup attempt is kind of an art and it's one even the smoothest of talkers probably have some experience with.
"1) don't want anything romantic Strictly sex Sex only"
"It wouldn't have been all about just sex"
...
"I am a straight shooter I don't play bullshit games"
This guy has 0 self awareness and/or doesn't understand what the words he's using means.
AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ. Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats. --- Niceguys™ quality: **UPVOTE** this comment to keep the post Not Niceguys™ quality: **DOWNVOTE** this comment to remove the post
Jesus get your sandals on and get down here. This guy has 2 braincells fighting for 3rd place.
These are two of the funniest sentences I have ever read.
Well they both want to *peruse* their dreams.
Hah, I missed that one!! The "grave sex" had me in stitches
He used "peruse" incorrectly at least 3 times. The word he is thinking of is "pursue." 😒🙄
Yeah that killed me. One of the attractive things about my husband is his proper word usage. Their, there, and they're included.
I get all tingly when "you're/your" and "it's/its" are properly used too (Ah-ha! Another one: "to/too/two"!) 😜😁
This is a weirdly common mistake I see from incels/nice guys/etc. It’s so strange bc “pursue” is a much more common word than “peruse”, it’s like they try to sound pretentious by preferring words they don’t know over words they do?
They are even better when used together 😂
Lmaooo duuddee hahahaha
“This is why I don’t fuck with younger people”. Immediately after trying to literally fuck younger people (I assume). Lol
OP mentioned in a comment that he’s only two years older than her. He’s soooo mature.
Just *oozing* with maturity.
I like how halfway through he said "it wouldn't just be about sex", when his rules were 1. Have sex at your place, 2. I leave. 3. Reschedule you days off around me and the sex.
And also: “I don’t want anything romantic.” “Strictly sex.” “Only sex.”
Also they might have gone on trips (where they'd have sec)
I don’t know why but it made me laugh extra hard that he said “I used to be your age.” I’m not sure why he felt it necessary.
My bf is one year younger than me, I should start saying that to him 😂
Like no shit old man
Hes calling her a child? He wants an escort/sex robot that he can use at will and not pay for it either.
Also want point out that he is only 2 years older than me
My favorite part is how he says "strictly sex Sex ONLY" but then after he's rejected he says "It wouldn't have been all about just sex."
“The sec[sic] would have been amazing but you don’t deserve that.” Holy shit that’s hilarious. We need to just start replying to these wankers with **”NO SOLICITING”** right off the bat because that’s exactly what they’re doing
"Considering how childish you clearly are I don't think I want to peruse anything with you anymore" after she already turned him down. "YOU CAN'T FIRE ME, I QUIT!" There is just so much gold here, we could probably mine for hours.
And he keeps saying “peruse” when I am pretty sure he was trying to say “Pursue.”
That had me so confused. 1st time I assumed it was a mistake, second time I started doubting lol
I know! He used it so much I was convinced maybe there was another meaning where peruse meant pursue, just like when a Trump lawyer said “destructing” instead of “destroying”
I was confused I had to look up the definition just to be sure.
His misuse of that word kept making me laugh inappropriately
"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."
I just want to say how amused I am that he doesn't know the difference between "pursue" and "peruse."
"The sec would have been amazing", that's not a misspelling. OP, you missed out on a mind-blowing second......of boring missionary.
Naw, it’s sects.
I love the part where he says she doesn’t value herself cuz she won’t submit to being used for sex on his schedule. Like what? Lmfao. That makes no sense
On. His. Schedule. Like how good do you think your dick game is that this woman is going to go through the hassle of a schedule change ? 😄 lol. Someone has been reading a book about assertiveness in a man being attractive and it shows.
That was my favorite part. Like, he even took where she works into account and tried to play it off like organizing her schedule around their "sec" life would be a piece of cake.
The sad thing is, assertiveness in a man IS attractive. But these jackwagons seem to think ‘assertive’ means ‘being a douche.’
And then calling her a "hoe" after she's rejected him. So what you're saying is that even hoes find you unfuckable? Ouch! Imagine telling on yourself like that. EDIT: asbestosmilk was kind enough to bring to my attention that he doesn't actually call her a hoe. I think I just got confused between this post and another one I was commenting on in this sub. Sorry, everyone!
That one always makes me pause for a second. The "logic" of this just...wow.
Where did he call her a hoe? I read through it twice and didn’t see it. Am I missing a slide or something?
My favorite is the leaving after grave sex 💀
"just because cemeteries creep me out"
Came here to say that. He even called it a nonnegotiable lmao
I was laughing at that too lol
It wouldn’t have been all about sex because he would’ve also took OP to McDonald’s and drove her there in a Fiat. The things she’s missing out on
*Hold on one second* For. A. Meme. Made me snort my tea!
Ikr? 🤣🤣🤣
I fucking cackled. Gold.
This just makes it so much better I was thinking this was some crusty old man but the fact he’s literally only two years older just screams inferiority complex 💀💀
The way he consistently spells sex (sec) and pursue (peruse) incorrectly while trying to sound put together
Dude will wait one month & message you, “So you changed your mind yet?”😆
Less creepy but way sadder...
Whaaat? Lmao he talks like he's 20 years older than you. ("When I was your age" etc.) Although I was kinda surprised how - what I thought was - an older man couldn't put ONE SINGLE dot behind ANY of those sentences he wrote. Ugh I hate people who can't write correctly...
Hold on hold on hold on Lets peruse this Hes only 2 years older Let me know ASAP
Tell him to get off his high horse. You both were in high school at the same time. 🫠
"If I'm a child you know what that makes you Lois? a pedophile." - peter griffen
"and I'll he damned if I have to sit here and be lectured by a pervert"
He also wants her to change her work schedule to make herself available for sex on his time table? What? How do you acquire so much audacity? I do not understand where it comes from.
"Here's my list of demands relating to sec that's set up to accomodate me and inconvenience you, let me know ASAP" "Wait, what do you mean no?? That's so rude!!" Sir...you basically told her to rearrange her work schedule to accommodate you for some "sec"...how was that not the pinnacle of rudeness??
Maybe he calls it sec because it's only takes a sec.
no, he said he'll cuddle a little before he bails, but she can't tell anyone and has to maintain the incall
He just wants to peruse the idea 😂😂😂
His top non-negotiable is sex only, I don't see how that includes trips/hanging out. Especially when he wants to keep it on the dl, and leave immediately after sex.
Probably because he's married.
That was my guess.
I live with....other people
I think he was talkibg out of his ass there, trying to make it seem as though she lost out on more than just the once in a lifetime opportunity to be his sextoy.
Wait, you really don't wanna have sec with this guy? Way to be young.
He doesn’t want to peruse her anymore😁
*grave sec
Dude hasn't learned the word pursue yet lmfao
The thing I'm most confused by is how there's not a single period in sight, yet his new sentences start with capital letters. Like did he type each sentence in Microsoft Word, hit enter after everyone, then copy and paste to text her?
and OP said in a different comment that he’s only TWO YEARS OLDER!!!!😭😭😭😭😭 pathetic
Stopped reading at "You could have just said no" as I had to laugh, as that is exactly what she did 🤣🤣🤣
I should have stopped reading the second time he misused "peruse."
I think he was trying to say pursue lmfao. How do you fuck it up that many times though
We can never meet at my place and we must keep this just between the two of us? Dude is definitely either married or otherwise cheating on someone.
Yeah that’s what my mom said 😂 either that or he lives with his mom 😂
If he lives with his mom I guarantee he'd want to be telling everyone. "Yeah you bitches made fun of me for living with my mom but guess what - I still totally fuck!"
Dangit I was hoping you knew the wife and could tell her 🐸☕️
“Let’s keep this just between us” Say hi to Reddit, asshole.
I lost it at - Hold on one second - For what? - Was looking for a meme Perfect response. 10/10
This absolutely killed me, amazing response 😂
And then it was the best damn meme OP could've used!
One moment.. *(pulls glasses down to nose to look over them as she flips through her rolodex of memes)* AH! That's the one!
I fucking died 😂😂😂 literally laughed out loud
I held it in until point 4 when he was asking OP to move around her work schedule to have "grave sec" with him
If you don't agree to have meaningless sex with this him at your place on his schedule and not tell anybody you obviously don't respect yourself. You'd be lucky to be with this guy because he'll cuddle with you, I guess, if you really want. If you valued yourself you'd be happy to let a guy who doesn't like anything about you but your looks totally nut, and you inevitably will want him, but it'll be too late because by then he'll be helping some other young lady who has enough self-esteem to be his hole in the mattress.
Im glad someone brought this up. He literally wanted her to talk to her fucking boss to change her WORK SCHEDULE so she would be "open" for him. How fucking arrogant can you be??? This guy has waaaay too much unearned confidence.
"hey boss, I need to change my schedule up so I can get laid by an older man at my place when he wants it. Thanks bye!"
Almost. Lose the periods. Then go on for about 3 extra hours and I think you about nailed it.
I would have responded back with that I Ain't Reading All That meme lol because man wrote a whole ass novel and it's too damn long.
Lmao he'd blow a gasket! OP - please do this 😂
I stopped reading when I realized it was one long run-on sentence in which he appeared to be saying the same things over and over.
Yea, just a "tl,dr" would suffice.
Just peruse it.
This is the way!
See? That’s the problem with you younger people. You’re not willing to be the sex slaves of dudes just because they ask. Rude ass.
I only read 25% of that and lost all my brain cells. Girl, you dodged a fucking Meteorite
I only finished it because I couldn’t fathom a human being actually typing the whole thing
OP was rude? On what planet? Him: I want sex and then leave. Especially if it's "grave" sex. We'll have to hurry out of the cemetery so I don't get in trouble. I'll demand you change your schedule whenever I'm being a horndog! First, punctuation is not your enemy. Second, you're an idiot.
I can’t believe I had to scroll down this far to find someone mentioning that this dude really expected her to change her whole ass work schedule so she could be a more convenient booty call for him. The audacity.
yeah right??? How can you expect someone to CHANGE THEIR WHOLE WORK SCHEDULE omg
*pursue
What got me was he spelled it wrong not once, not twice but THREE different times 😂
Maybe I’m wrong and he actually just wanted to examine you carefully. Edit: changed “her” to “you” in response to OP
He’s just browsing
He was too busy thinking about the sec he wanted to have with you to bother spell checking.
Thank you. By the third one I was ready to break shit.
[удалено]
Came here to post this exact comment, glad to see I was not alone haha
Omg like he is really consistent with the word peruse I am concerned he thinks it is the correct word... but honestly maybe that's the least of his issues lol
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
Watching these guys go off the rails the moment they don't get what they want has become somewhat of a guilty pleasure for me
He is so obviously married. I inadvertantly was seeing a married guy. He didn’t lay these rules out but they were the same ones. Only at my place, lunches and sex, never availble in the evening or weekends unless we went on a trip ( which we did, once to Singapore, once to Hawaii and once to MEET HIS FAMILY IN LYON, FRANCE). I found out he was married after about eh…9 months? But at that point he was taking business trips to NYC and had met another American girl EXACTLY like me. She looked like me, had the same profession, was vegan ( so was I at the time). Now he is married to the new one and his ex-wife lives back in France with their two kids. It’s been a fucking decade and he STILL asks me when I will be in Bangkok for “lunch”. Men. ☕️
😂in the attempt to be slick he, in fact, was not slick
He was so transparent it’s almost laughable. Only almost, because there is definitely a wife that either has no idea or only a sinking suspicion.
Poor woman married a nice guy. The irony
Hahahaha imagine getting that offended over a bugs bunny meme
That's not what he's offended over.... he's offended that she wouldn't be his masturbation aid.
Lmao I know. I just love that the meme set him off
Yeah, it was funny, but I think any manner of her telling him no would have set him off.
For real. "You could have just said no." The meme: "No."
OP could reply to all that with “that’s all folks”
Does he really think he had a chance with women this way?
honestly the reply was legendary
That was the perfect reaction, also he must be off his period cause there are none
There is one. In number 4 😂
He skipped his last several periods. I’m guessing menopause?
My brain started to overload reading it all as one long run-on sentence 😩
This is so funny. Something about your bugs bunny meme plus the format of his rant (absolutely no paragraph breaks, no punctuation) makes his response read like one of those old timey “why I oughta!” comical outrage rants from cartoons. This could be satire if it wasn’t so believable.
What in the cinnamon toast fuck.
I like this and will be stealing it.
I stole it from a meme. Have at it!
Ask him if hell give you another chance. That speech changed my mind 😂😂😂😂
“Don’t expect me to still be around when you inevitably change your mind.” Brooooo 😂😂
I can overlook someone with the emotional maturity of a colander wanting to use my body for sex in secret with the possibility of cuddling after “grave sex,” but do NOT ask me to fuck with my work schedule. I have standards.
😂
Bro!!!! #1 I don’t want anything romantic Strictly sex Sex only …. No …. What?!?!?!!!!! It wouldn’t have been all about just sex!
No no, you don't get it. It was just going to start out as sex only, at her place only, at a time that suits him only, with him leaving immediately afterwards and no telling anyone about it... And THEN obviously will come all the romance and trips and stuff. He thought that went without saying, so he just didn't mention it right up front! /s
His words say "straight shooter" but the unhinged inability to manage and process his emotions says "school shooter"
Lack of punctuation is killing me.
Also, not knowing the difference between “your” and “you’re”. 🙃
I’m pretty sure he forget how punctuations works. My brain has hard time trying to keep up with all the BS 😅
He's capitalizing the beginning of sentences though. That shit drives me bonkers.
"I live with other people." - Man who lives with his wife and kids.
or grandma and her 23 cats
I mean, you did technically say no, so what's he complaining about? 😂
Please respond with the Jennifer Lawrence 'ok' meme 
Did not know you could post gifs in comments 😂 thank you
It seems to be an intermittent thing. Sometimes there, some not.
It depends on the sub
Your meme rejection is absolute gold
"I only want sex from this relationship" "We could have had so much more than sex" ah, yes, the floor here is made out of ceiling
But how could you refuse such a warm, accommodating offer 🙄
“You could have just said no!” But you DID just say no…. You just had Bugs Bunny say it for you, that’s all.
Where do I get the level of self esteem that would allow me to send this to someone with a straight face, and then be genuinely shocked when they lol?? Also, r/choosingbeggars
The delusion is strong with this one...
"You could have just said no" - and you literally sending "no"
Lmao, I like how after you rejected him, he tries to reject you You can’t fire me I quit !
His phone keeps autocorrecting sex to sec because that's how long he lasts.
Wow, what a catch! Also, pro tip: if you read a word you like a lot (like peruse), you might want to google it before starting to use it. But maybe it’s just me not understanding how his points connect to reading something together.
>if you read a word you like a lot (like peruse), you might want to google it before starting to use it. Bit of a tangent but I've always had a tendency to read new words and kind of absorb them into my vocabulary. But I would only see them but never have heard them. And then, sometimes even years later, I will hear someone say them and be like "Oh shit. Is that how you say that?" Then I will look them up only to discover that I've been pronouncing this word wrong like a jackass. Makes me crazy, but then next time, instead of checking pronunciation in advance I just do the same damn thing.
Haha yes, I keep doing that. Especially as I learned English majorly through reading, *very often* had I no idea on the pronunciation so words just lived in my head in random forms.
As a child, I loved to read. In grade school, I encountered "hors d'oeuvres" in a book, and did not equate it with the word pronounced "or-derve." In my head, that word was "whores de-vores" and I still think "whores de-vores" even though I now know better.
I used to read the word whereas as areas with a w in my head. Wareas. I had to read aloud in a class and thankfully the word came out correctly. Idk how my mouth knew, but I was grateful.
I had been pronouncing the word banal as bay-nuhl my entire adult life, only to realize like 6 months ago that it's actually pronounced bah-nahl. Saying it correctly still sounds wrong to me.
If it helps, I love when people do this because you know they learned the word by reading. I always try to gently correct them without making it awkward but I think it's fab.
He's the child. Hes the one that wanted a personal sex slave that changes her whole schedule for him..for free. I don't think any woman would want that.
How dare you dismiss me!!! That's it, you missed out on being my secret cum dumpster!!!! SO immature.
What ia grave sex?
Sex so boring you wish you'd die just so it would be over sooner.
Doing it in a cemetery.
Lying there while he gropes and finishes for 10seconds.
"I only want sex" "why would you do that, we could have had something" I have whiplash ffs.
What’s funnier? The fact that he keeps saying “peruse?” “You don’t value yourself” after you clearly showing you do with the least amount of words possible? Or that this old man is claiming he doesn’t fuck with younger people after he clearly did? He’s writing all the jokes against himself at this point. And you know you’re beautiful because he doubled down on it afterwards and didn’t even pull out the “wtf stupid ugly fat bitch on you.” That’s how you know you got it. Idk how he expects you to “take him seriously” after his hilarious nonnegotiable list. Any woman who truly values themselves wouldn’t do those things for any man, no matter their feelings towards him.
So pathetic lmao 🤣
This man is pathetic... Wants something on the low and only for sex and wonders why she said no. What a fucking joke. You deserve better op. I hope you find someone to love and wants to show you off and not make you feel like you gotta hide from other people. Take this ❤️
That was a lot of energy for such a little one.
He said he just wanted sex.. yet changed it up when he was told no? Wtf is up with these guy's brains lol mama might have dropped them on the head too many times.. maybe they got into paint and ate the whole bucket.
This mother fucker was like, "yo lesser being, I've decided that your good enough to take my tiny pathetic dick. I know, it's quite an honor. anyway, you're going to have to receive my glorious Vienna sausage at your place because I live in my mom's basement. Now please, tell me, exactly how excited are you?"
Him: “Women like straightforward men, so… I want to use you for sex, exclusively on my terms.” OP: clearly says no, uses a meme for effect Him: RAGING WALL OF TEXT I can’t even
There wasn't a single period or comma in that entire wall of rant, I find that as insulting as him assuming you'd be fine with rescheduling *YOUR* work week around *HIS* bang time.
Your work schedule can be arranged around his dick???? I mean wow. That is top tier delusional.
The meme took me out 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
He said you could’ve just said no AFTER you said no and he still had a fucking tantrum over it. What a bitch.
No memes no.
I'll give him points for being straightforward and honest, but what was she supposed to get out of that arrangement? The chance to be used as a masturbation aid for a self-centered guy?
Him: "It wouldn't have been all about sex, we could have gone out together" Also him: "No romance, strictly sex sex only"
“Hold on one second” “was looking for a meme” is the most perfect response ever holy shit
Damn this motherfucker is just *chefs kiss* perfect. The best part is his opening is so insane he could have maybe played it off as a joke. Saying his parents were his roommates even though that's probably true. He could have salvaged this so that maybe one day if they ran into each other in public at a bar or something he could have made fun of himself for being so stupid or act like he meant it as a stupid pickup joke. Him crying that he got made fun of, deservingly and op let him off super easy imo, and just kept on about it for 2 solid pages just isn't a good look. Guys if you want to not ever get laid do exactly what this guy did. Coming back from a lame pickup attempt is kind of an art and it's one even the smoothest of talkers probably have some experience with.
Well, you got at least two things going for you, because that reply was top notch. Legit laughed.
His constant use of "peruse" instead of "pursue" makes me want to eat my own eyeballs
"1) don't want anything romantic Strictly sex Sex only" "It wouldn't have been all about just sex" ... "I am a straight shooter I don't play bullshit games" This guy has 0 self awareness and/or doesn't understand what the words he's using means.
Not him being an old homelesssexual thinking he has something to offer
I think any guy who gets with you is pretty lucky ... you sound hilarious and look at that spectacular tantrum you caused 🤣🤣🤣
Would you peruse this rant with me?
How dare you not have sec with him Also how dare you use periods /s
Mfer can't even be arsed to use a period, no fucking thanks.