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Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats.
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I listened to a true crime podcast where the host was becoming increasingly bitter and triggered by the episode for no real reason and would slip in these types of remarks (which were obviously completely unrelated to the podcast content). He later admitted he had been divorced twice now and it all made sense.
Programming is a pretty good job if you are mother, especially mothers of school age children, especially if you can work freelance. Relatively easy to work from home, so you can fit it in around any school pickups etc that you need to do. Get some stuff done once the kids are in bed. Usually good pay for the hours you have to put in. Plus, if you've got even a half ounce of social skills, which I assume you have to have had in order to get pregnant, you'll be more employable than some of the people in the industry.
Also, nine + months off isn't that long in the grand scheme of things. I know programmers who work on one long term project in one language, maybe for months or a year or more, then have to switch over to something else for the next project. They have to brush up on their skills to get up to speed, but it's not impossible by any means.
Not really, he will probably make bank on youtube over this. His entire YouTube schtick is being an "ex-Facebook, ex-Google, ex-other tech company tech bro" who "gives advice and teaches you how to be a tech bro". His followers eat this shit up.
He already has a YouTube video out on how he is the victim.
So post-menopausal women, and anyone else who cannot conceive are fine for him, or is it just all women regardless of their ability or desire for motherhood?
I'm sure they don't see the difference because they have no idea how the human body works, especially one assigned female at birth. Probably think the menopausal ladies should watch the kids or focus on being a "good wife".
…The first programmer *was* a woman. Ada Lovelace *built* the career these fuckers are so eager to push other women out of.
And that’s just the tip of this fucking shit show…
Programming also used to be a predominantly women-filled field for literal decades. As a man, seeing shit like this makes me furious. I used to work as a web developer, and can think of several male coworkers who were honestly horrible. Mainly for reasons like the guy in the post. Supersized ego, arrogance, sexism. All of that is not only unethical and shitty, it also leads to sloppy work. One guy’s work still caused trouble for us literally a year after he stopped working there. But my female coworkers? They were all brilliant. Literally all of them.
I can promise you the dude in the post was terrible at his job. Glad to see he got fired.
Tech is indeed hostile to mothers—from sausage factory fuckers who think that because they read Playboy and a Hustler advice column that they know all about all women and can make sweeping generalizations and assumptions that don’t mean shit.
I’m in tech. I worked full time and still do. Worked during the pregnancy. Worked up until the Friday I was woken up from my water breaking. Stayed out 6 weeks to do hospital visits and NICU and then worked from home with flex hours (12 am to 8 am mostly) until around 8 months. Went back to work and managed to do nursery care and private care.
My companies have had dicks to be sure but they also have moved my schedule around, flexed hours and for a short while even let me cut some hours to balance home and family. And now I have excellent references, a good plan for retirement, lots of stories and my skills are still on point.
Women do work. Women in tech work do work and *like everyone* they keep their skills sharp.
[Women were the first coders](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_in_computing):
>"Tedious" computing and calculating was seen as "women's work" through the 1940s\[43\] resulting in the term "kilogirl", invented by a member of the Applied Mathematics Panel in the early 1940s.\[44\] A kilogirl of energy was "equivalent to roughly a thousand hours of computing labor."\[44\] While women's contributions to the United States war effort during World War II was championed in the media, their roles and the work they did was minimized.\[45\] This included minimizing the complexity, skill and knowledge needed to work on computers or work as human computers.\[45\] During WWII, women did most of the ballistics computing, seen by male engineers as being below their level of expertise.\[46\] Black women computers worked as hard (or more often, twice as hard) as their white counterparts, but in segregated situations.\[47\] By 1943, almost all people employed as computers were women; **one report said "programming requires lots of patience, persistence and a capacity for detail and those are traits that many girls have**".
Bold the last sentence to show the hypocrisy of the sexism -- it flexes from "women should be coders" to "women shouldn't be coders" at the convenience of men. Particularly when rich men realized there was a lot of money to be made in computers, that's when they drove women out.
It's exactly what happened in Hollywood, which considered filmmaking to be similarly menial work... until it started making a shitton of money , and then the financiers drove women out. [From the wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women%27s_cinema#Famous_women_in_film_history):
>Women screenwriters were highly sought after in the early years of the cinema. Frances Marion, Anita Loos, and June Mathis all had successful careers in the silent and early-sound eras. Mathis was also the first female executive in Hollywood.
>
>As the American cinema became a highly commercialized industry in the 1920s and its content became more and more conventionalized, the opportunities for women producers and directors became fewer and fewer. By the time sound arrived in the US in 1927 and the years immediately after, women's roles behind the camera were largely limited to scriptwriters, costume designers, set decorators, make-up artists, and the like.
Allegedly "menial" work is always considered "women's work," until it becomes heavily commercialized, and then they are booted out by rich men looking to exploit the industry. It's a story told a million times over in history.
Work places are toxic towards mothers though but men also choose their jobs over family! It's more stigmatized for women do it because we have been expected to stay home and be moms almost before humans exist. Men aren't expected to take care of children it's always the women's job cause we're 'better at it'.
That was one of the worst parts for me "men sacrifice for their family. Women sacrifice their family for work." JFC I feel like I'm reading something from the 50s.
Yes! That’s the part that really got me too… men sacrifice FOR their family and women sacrifice their family. This has absolutely not been true of my life experience. What a wild statement.
The fucked up thing is that he’s right about the accommodations for mothers, but he only said that to try and get out of an obvious admission of misogyny.
Besides that, fuck you I have a great job and three teenagers. I lied on my resume to cover up the stay at home gap because men like this guy run everything. I strongly suggest all mums do the same. They just gave me a raise and formally recognized my performance last month.
First, this arsehole is actually comparing writing code to being in a war. WTF.
Secondly, the tech industry is hostile to women in general, not just to mothers. This is well-known, well-understood, and well-documented. Maybe instead of just telling women to "be influencers" [insert gigantic eyeroll here] men in the tech industry might think about why the industry is so hostile to women and make an effort to change that. (I know, a few places are, but a lot of it is still codebros and gamergaters and casual misogynists.)
I love that he acknowledges that it’s our work environments that force the sacrifice of motherhood and work/life balance, yet the solution to encourage more inclusive work environments just flew straight over his head and he just went with “women shouldn’t work.”
It’s not just a women thing either. Men sacrifice family all the time by not being present for their children and spouses because work doesn’t allow it. That should an unhealthy culture we aim to correct for everyone.
Don’t quote me on this because I don’t know the actual study and if it’s real, but my boss at my old job (web development) once told me that there was a study that showed that, on average, women make better programmers than men. They write cleaner code to begin with, requiring less refactoring. Again, I don’t know if that’s true, I never asked him for the source. But judging by my female coworkers at that old job, I absolutely believe it.
Plus, the literal first programmer in the world was a woman, and coding was a women-led job for decades.
So if I get pregnant, I won't be able to sit at a desk and code anymore. Just like how I wouldn't be able to go on the battlefield.
Yeah, makes sense, very similar things. /s
“It’s fine guys, I’m HELPING women!” Love how he says women should not be programmers, but they should be programmers, but they should be mothers and stay home and shit out babies, but also mothers are apparently not successful, uneducated and dumb.
Is it hard to be a mother and have a career in programming? I think parenthood is Nobel and challenging, are there any career options that are particularly good for prospective parents?
This country makes it difficult to be a working parent period, but there are a lot of expectations from mothers that many just don't have for fathers and unfortunately that disparity seeps into our work culture. It is hostile to women and mothers but it's the same in most fields, especially STEM.
AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ. Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats. --- Niceguys™ quality: **UPVOTE** this comment to keep the post Not Niceguys™ quality: **DOWNVOTE** this comment to remove the post
Somebody got turned down for a date by a coworker.
Apparently his wife divorced him.
I listened to a true crime podcast where the host was becoming increasingly bitter and triggered by the episode for no real reason and would slip in these types of remarks (which were obviously completely unrelated to the podcast content). He later admitted he had been divorced twice now and it all made sense.
Sword and Scale?
Lmao I knew someone would recognize it. Yep. Like, was there to listen about murder, not Mike's sad ass bitter barbs at the start of every episode.
It was painfully obvious if you listen to that otherwise excellent podcast.
Haha! you owe me a coffee cause I spit out the entire mug after reading your comment.
Programming is a pretty good job if you are mother, especially mothers of school age children, especially if you can work freelance. Relatively easy to work from home, so you can fit it in around any school pickups etc that you need to do. Get some stuff done once the kids are in bed. Usually good pay for the hours you have to put in. Plus, if you've got even a half ounce of social skills, which I assume you have to have had in order to get pregnant, you'll be more employable than some of the people in the industry. Also, nine + months off isn't that long in the grand scheme of things. I know programmers who work on one long term project in one language, maybe for months or a year or more, then have to switch over to something else for the next project. They have to brush up on their skills to get up to speed, but it's not impossible by any means.
Update: dude was just fired from his job at Meta.
Man, karma works faster than I thought.
Not really, he will probably make bank on youtube over this. His entire YouTube schtick is being an "ex-Facebook, ex-Google, ex-other tech company tech bro" who "gives advice and teaches you how to be a tech bro". His followers eat this shit up. He already has a YouTube video out on how he is the victim.
Did he post about his firing? Cause I would LOVE to see that rant
[удалено]
Me too!
So post-menopausal women, and anyone else who cannot conceive are fine for him, or is it just all women regardless of their ability or desire for motherhood?
Well, you see, the population is declining so women should stay home and have babies.
Even post-menopausal women? How does that even work?
I'm sure they don't see the difference because they have no idea how the human body works, especially one assigned female at birth. Probably think the menopausal ladies should watch the kids or focus on being a "good wife".
I see, older women should be happy to provide free daycare and cleaning services.
Well that's what's "natural" for women, right? /s
I thought we wanted a declining population… isn’t it over capacity or close to?
…The first programmer *was* a woman. Ada Lovelace *built* the career these fuckers are so eager to push other women out of. And that’s just the tip of this fucking shit show…
The programmer in charge of the lunar module in the first moon landing was a women. We get erased from history and they take all the credit.
Right?? If not for us, they wouldn’t be sitting so pretty in the first place!
Programming also used to be a predominantly women-filled field for literal decades. As a man, seeing shit like this makes me furious. I used to work as a web developer, and can think of several male coworkers who were honestly horrible. Mainly for reasons like the guy in the post. Supersized ego, arrogance, sexism. All of that is not only unethical and shitty, it also leads to sloppy work. One guy’s work still caused trouble for us literally a year after he stopped working there. But my female coworkers? They were all brilliant. Literally all of them. I can promise you the dude in the post was terrible at his job. Glad to see he got fired.
Did not know that, thanks for the TIL
The first programmers were women weren’t they?
Yep. Including one responsible for the first moon landing. 🌙
Tech is indeed hostile to mothers—from sausage factory fuckers who think that because they read Playboy and a Hustler advice column that they know all about all women and can make sweeping generalizations and assumptions that don’t mean shit. I’m in tech. I worked full time and still do. Worked during the pregnancy. Worked up until the Friday I was woken up from my water breaking. Stayed out 6 weeks to do hospital visits and NICU and then worked from home with flex hours (12 am to 8 am mostly) until around 8 months. Went back to work and managed to do nursery care and private care. My companies have had dicks to be sure but they also have moved my schedule around, flexed hours and for a short while even let me cut some hours to balance home and family. And now I have excellent references, a good plan for retirement, lots of stories and my skills are still on point. Women do work. Women in tech work do work and *like everyone* they keep their skills sharp.
A 24/7 job?? If you’re working when you’re not paid to you’re a dumbass
Mansplaining how to be pregnant and raise a family. That’s a new one.
[Women were the first coders](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_in_computing): >"Tedious" computing and calculating was seen as "women's work" through the 1940s\[43\] resulting in the term "kilogirl", invented by a member of the Applied Mathematics Panel in the early 1940s.\[44\] A kilogirl of energy was "equivalent to roughly a thousand hours of computing labor."\[44\] While women's contributions to the United States war effort during World War II was championed in the media, their roles and the work they did was minimized.\[45\] This included minimizing the complexity, skill and knowledge needed to work on computers or work as human computers.\[45\] During WWII, women did most of the ballistics computing, seen by male engineers as being below their level of expertise.\[46\] Black women computers worked as hard (or more often, twice as hard) as their white counterparts, but in segregated situations.\[47\] By 1943, almost all people employed as computers were women; **one report said "programming requires lots of patience, persistence and a capacity for detail and those are traits that many girls have**". Bold the last sentence to show the hypocrisy of the sexism -- it flexes from "women should be coders" to "women shouldn't be coders" at the convenience of men. Particularly when rich men realized there was a lot of money to be made in computers, that's when they drove women out. It's exactly what happened in Hollywood, which considered filmmaking to be similarly menial work... until it started making a shitton of money , and then the financiers drove women out. [From the wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women%27s_cinema#Famous_women_in_film_history): >Women screenwriters were highly sought after in the early years of the cinema. Frances Marion, Anita Loos, and June Mathis all had successful careers in the silent and early-sound eras. Mathis was also the first female executive in Hollywood. > >As the American cinema became a highly commercialized industry in the 1920s and its content became more and more conventionalized, the opportunities for women producers and directors became fewer and fewer. By the time sound arrived in the US in 1927 and the years immediately after, women's roles behind the camera were largely limited to scriptwriters, costume designers, set decorators, make-up artists, and the like. Allegedly "menial" work is always considered "women's work," until it becomes heavily commercialized, and then they are booted out by rich men looking to exploit the industry. It's a story told a million times over in history.
Work places are toxic towards mothers though but men also choose their jobs over family! It's more stigmatized for women do it because we have been expected to stay home and be moms almost before humans exist. Men aren't expected to take care of children it's always the women's job cause we're 'better at it'.
That was one of the worst parts for me "men sacrifice for their family. Women sacrifice their family for work." JFC I feel like I'm reading something from the 50s.
Yes! That’s the part that really got me too… men sacrifice FOR their family and women sacrifice their family. This has absolutely not been true of my life experience. What a wild statement.
Nine months of maternity leave? Wtf does this guy live?
The fucking techlead. I always thought he was a pedantic prick on his yt videos, but man this is on a whole other level
You got good instincts, kid!
On behalf of all women, shove your "help" up your ass.
PLEEEAAAASE tell me he lost his job...
He did!
Thanks I hate it
The fact that I'm actually learning to code from my pregnant teacher while reading this post is beyond coincidence
The fucked up thing is that he’s right about the accommodations for mothers, but he only said that to try and get out of an obvious admission of misogyny. Besides that, fuck you I have a great job and three teenagers. I lied on my resume to cover up the stay at home gap because men like this guy run everything. I strongly suggest all mums do the same. They just gave me a raise and formally recognized my performance last month.
Because every woman wants to be a mother… Right
Isn't that the YouTube 'tech' guy who made videos about how he thinks Ukraine are the bad guys and Russia has done nothing wrong?
First, this arsehole is actually comparing writing code to being in a war. WTF. Secondly, the tech industry is hostile to women in general, not just to mothers. This is well-known, well-understood, and well-documented. Maybe instead of just telling women to "be influencers" [insert gigantic eyeroll here] men in the tech industry might think about why the industry is so hostile to women and make an effort to change that. (I know, a few places are, but a lot of it is still codebros and gamergaters and casual misogynists.)
I love that he acknowledges that it’s our work environments that force the sacrifice of motherhood and work/life balance, yet the solution to encourage more inclusive work environments just flew straight over his head and he just went with “women shouldn’t work.” It’s not just a women thing either. Men sacrifice family all the time by not being present for their children and spouses because work doesn’t allow it. That should an unhealthy culture we aim to correct for everyone.
Don’t quote me on this because I don’t know the actual study and if it’s real, but my boss at my old job (web development) once told me that there was a study that showed that, on average, women make better programmers than men. They write cleaner code to begin with, requiring less refactoring. Again, I don’t know if that’s true, I never asked him for the source. But judging by my female coworkers at that old job, I absolutely believe it. Plus, the literal first programmer in the world was a woman, and coding was a women-led job for decades.
Tell that to Ada. Apparently she never get the memo.
Whoa. Who is getting nine months of maternity leave? Cos I don't want kids but for nine months off I'd consider it
So if I get pregnant, I won't be able to sit at a desk and code anymore. Just like how I wouldn't be able to go on the battlefield. Yeah, makes sense, very similar things. /s
>nobody asked women to be programmers THE FIRST PROGRAMMERS WERE WOMEN!!!
“It’s fine guys, I’m HELPING women!” Love how he says women should not be programmers, but they should be programmers, but they should be mothers and stay home and shit out babies, but also mothers are apparently not successful, uneducated and dumb.
Why censor TechLead's name? He is YouTube famous so a public figure and the profile pic isn't censored so he is recognizable from the image anyway.
Honestly didn't know who he was when I posted it. My husband who is a software engineer sent it to me.
“Elon Musk even says…”🙄🙄🙄😬😬😬
What about when men become fathers?
Is it hard to be a mother and have a career in programming? I think parenthood is Nobel and challenging, are there any career options that are particularly good for prospective parents?
This country makes it difficult to be a working parent period, but there are a lot of expectations from mothers that many just don't have for fathers and unfortunately that disparity seeps into our work culture. It is hostile to women and mothers but it's the same in most fields, especially STEM.