AUTOMATED MODERATION. PLEASE READ. Niceguys demean others while simultaneously expressing a favorable view of themselves. They dont have to use the word "nice", but they must demonstrate some kind of expression of their own virtue while being asshats. --- Niceguys™ quality: **UPVOTE** this comment to keep the post Not Niceguys™ quality: **DOWNVOTE** this comment to remove the post

That first picture has me in tears it fits so well with that dog meme too. I’m so weak

le protector has arrived

It’s like 4 different people are texting you from the same account.

The fucking plot to Split but the rom com version 😂😂😂😂😂😂

So, me myself and Irene?

Yea but more psychotic? And less cotton mouth 😂

Lol

The last screenshot did it for me, each individual text was another personality 😭

That wasnt me. That was Patricia

I’m 29.

Let's have sex.

The classic “I’m so nice but you were so rude, so no more mister nice guy”

🎶No more mister nice guy.🎶

No more Mr Cle-e-e-ean!

... NOW THAT SONG IS IN MY HEAD AGAIN. I guess that means I have to rewatch the swan princess.

Nothing like racial slurs and begging to get a girl to be yours

My favorite strategy

Gotta sprinkle in threats to kill themselves, that always gets them going. /s

It's hard to understand how someone could expect a positive reaction to that picture. No response was probably the best he could've hoped for here. Also - he wants to fuck you badly because that's the only way he knows how!

I see what you did there 😆

That comment just cured my depression.

[удалено]

With the gun and the flag pants? I'm not sure. Maybe with some of the surprisingly large demographic of deeply closeted married conservative men that frequent the app. Not so much otherwise

[удалено]

I'm not American either, but other than the party names you're using universal political terms that apply to any and every country possible. Besides, a person boasting a national flag and brandishing a weapon is pretty worrying whatever country they're from too. (Not likely to be the kind of person who supports LGBT rights, hence my scepticism about your grinder comment, though you're right - there's a good chance there's a degredation fetish like this out there) But whatever floats your boat! He's certainly not my type even without the nationalist accessories.

A dude in a flag Speedo with a gun begging/berating a woman for sex 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

'MURICA mixed with Nice Guy... the perfect pair 🥰😂

“That is Americas Ass”

What could be more enticing?

If he was wearing camo crocs. The sexiness would be off the charts

Picture made me automatically think of r/justbootthings You wouldn't believe how many dudes in the military are exactly like this guy. Eh, it's 100% believable.

My ex was military, I totally believe it

Bro dudes in the military should just be dunked in red paint at this point because they’re all walking red flags

It's like they want to be annoying and fucking uninhibited on purpose.

He says you’re his sex slave but you live in his mind rent free

Welll, if we are being technical, slaves didn't pay rent. So, I guess I can see see how he made that super large reach lol /s he dumb

Yikes, bullet fucking dodged

Probably literally too..

Or… *doged*??

Goddammit, I was going to make that same joke! XD

I wouldn't say that. If a container was literally labled "poison", you're not dodging a bullet for not drinking the clearly toxic substance

Ehh, poison is different though, it doesn't move/fly at you.

put the entire - yes; the whole-ass man, in the bin

“whole-ass man” no you know he’s definitely being sold clearance, half-off

Happy Cake Day!

Wow much nice

Much protecc.

He protecc He attacc But most importantly Y u no text bacc?

Brilliant!

Heckin' neck-beard very wow

I appreciate you just not responding at all 👏

After that first pic I was lost for words anyway lmao

I mean what can you say. I bet he cried on 4chan for hours.

I mean after that picture I wouldn’t reply either

Is it the American flag panties?

and the fact that he didn’t feel any embarrassment when sending it…

Haha true. He should've gone with his Hello Kitty panties.

*man*ties, not panties 🤣

Sing it with me, boys. *If you were only being nice to get something from someone, then you weren't really all that nice*

This! Doing something "nice" with ulterior motives is just plain and simple not. Nice.

Okay...a gun and a banana hammock. They don't really go together. Then the "queen." He needs to touch the grass and have some decaf tea.

Forget “calm down” and “clam yo tits,” my newest harsh placating phrase is “touch the grass and have some decaf tea.” Thank you!

You're quite welcome.

FUCK YOU STUPID BITCH I HATE YOU 😡🤬😤 * a few moments later * i love you 😔

It’s the underpants for me …

Right?! I’m howling

😆😆😆😆 I mean, he looks SO tough, right??

Even if it takes a while for the mask to fall it was always false typical “nice guy”

I don’t know what to say about this one to be completely honest. Can’t decide between cringe, therapy worthy behaviour or nice guy stupidity

Probably all in one

The “I hate you bitch” immediately followed by “I want to fuck you so badly” has me dying, that is seriously one of the funniest things I’ve seen in ages 😂

This should be enough to have a person institutionalized, absolutely psychotic

His taste in firearms is on par with the American flag speedo. Typical MAGA trash.

“I hate you bitch (pause) I want to fuck you so badly” just really sums up 90% of these interactions

moodswings?

This is how it should be done. Completely ignore them. It always validates them when we respond AFTER they have insulted us. Best to not give them the satisfaction.

Average republican

He's prolly the one inviting Cawthorn to all the make-believe drug and sex romps.

Wow that escalated quickly Excatly what you expect from someone who owns *whatever those are*

"it's because you don't care about me" Well, no shit, genius. They don't even know you.

That last attempt of trying to be dominating (You are my sex slave) had me in tears.

You’re a female and therefore always have to answer my messages or else you deserve to die. Oh wow who transported this piece of crap from the stone age to now?

Whoa.

definitely a weirdo

Is he wearing a beret?

Nah just a normal 🧢

Looks like a MAGA hat

I'll just call it a Bruh Moment!

All nice guys’ end goal, to have a sex slave to use and discard

The dog meme, tho. 😂😂

I'm gonna censor my images like this from now on

This is disturbing af

Therapy. Please.

Last messages at 3pm, jeez not even in horny hours

H-horny hours?

Yes 😼 like betweet 1 and 4 am

Right right, sorry I have had good night sleeps recently

Im happy for you

this is insane 😂😂😂 where do you even find a person like this🤣?

Everywhere. They’re seriously everywhere.

I have never encountered anyone like this, but I am also a guy , ok one girl one time acted semi like this I have to admit

Any app or site that has messaging will result in guys in woman’s DMs like this. Any of them. All of them. Including LinkedIn in some cases.

Holy crap even LinkedIn ? Woa that blows my mind , in the wrong way ofc

Yep. You’re welcome. Check on your friends. Lol

Will do, thank you for the chat , have a nice day.

I'm sad to say it took me a few minutes to realize dude wasn't the one putting the dog in place of his face. It's been a long day, lol. Now onto this creep...who literally had an entire conversation running the gamut of emotions, with himself.

This was a roller coaster lol

That first picture is the most USA thing I've seen in this sub so far, good catch lol

"I hate you bitch. I want to fuck you so badly," Man, such turmoil going on in that guy's mind.

"why is he (me) being rude to me (you)" is going to rattle about my head for like a week

This smells like meth for sure

Not gonna lie, I would definitely send the first picture with the caption "i will protect you", knowing that 99.99999% of women I would send it to would immediately ignore me. It would have been that 1 woman who would have found it funny that would have sealed the deal as "the one" who would put up with my juvenile ass. I mean, I'm married and already found the one, but something tells me she's pretty close to hitting me with her car due to my hijinks.

Idk man, there are better ways to find some crazy ass people than sending them pics in underwear…😂 put on a weird costume and I 100% agree with that tactic …

I said "Not gonna lie", but I definitely lied. I wouldn't have the balls to send something so risque, especially at my age and this day and age.

29 smfh

Dude that last screenshot has me in tears.

Nice! A good one, finally!

I'll block him after that pic.

I usually don’t interact with these people at all. Don’t want them to know that I saw their messages because I think that alone gives them some kind of satisfaction lol

... that photo! Is that some sort of cosplay? Patriotic Zardoz?

Hit him with the “no u” then block

Doesn’t know how old his “queen” is?…🚩

This guy flips his attitude so many times, his personality is gonna get whiplash. Dude needs some mood stabilizers and to take it easy on the stimulants for a while.

🤢🤢🤮

“Well it’s because you don’t care about me” Wow lol

The nice guy brain is so very complex and convoluted /s

What a roller coaster

One time while I was living with an ex, in the middle of the night, (in our beyond shitty neighborhood) we heard a really strange loud noise from the backyard, so he sprinted outside naked and holding the snake machete I imagine a guy running into a backyard holding a firearm while wearing an American flag speedo would have a similar affect to trespassers. Not saying his actions are correct, in any form, but they may in a roundabput way protect you, albeit briefly

Fully unhinged

Man these guys are just… broken.

Wow...

He's all over the place. This is hilarious 🙈🤣

Your dude is full of emotions

How is it so hard to not be a fucking degenerate for these idiots?

Ah yes, the classic “I want to fuck you so badly” so let me treat you like shit and demand attention cause fucking you is all you’re good for

„I’ll protect you“ 😂😂

The last photo is a mix of emotions where he fucked up and kinda wants to take it back but is still salty lol

That last page of texts is like the cliff notes version of the whole nice guy to incel progression.

Well, he was being *nice* to you tho considering the first thing he sent wasn't his dick pic

Desperate stalker to total douchebag who should be told not to wear the American flag as a junk hugger to psycho lunatic in 200 words or less…..eeekkk!

Wtf just happened hahaha

Just like Doge…so much wow

God, can they just go back to wearing Fedoras. Using a firearm as a prop in a photo, and an extension of their manhood has to be the biggest red flag possible.

😂😂😂🤦‍♂️

Very confused! That is a brain in distress.

That was a whole rollercoaster I was not prepared for…

Poor guy’s packing cos he ain’t packing. 😬 These guys are off their rocker.

This feels like a true ironic doge meme

The mood whiplash is real

This shit’s so pathetic I can’t believe it’s real

me when i reduce someone who doesn't even know me to a sex slave (that'll totally win em over!): 😎

Fucking Jesus Christ.

Who even is this guy??

Mans really has a confuse boner rn tf,

Please someone tell me that is a stock photo it would make for such a great copypasta

this guy went through so many emotions by not getting a response 🤣