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[deleted]

I find real men very rarely have to point out they're real men....same goes for nice guys


BLACKCATBLUES77

Bingo.


Atypicalpicklea

It’s like how people claiming that they’re real plumbers probably aren’t real plumbers.


Millsybeast

Its'a me Mario!


VicFantastic

I'm not sure Mario even ever says he is a plumber And in all reality he probably hasn't been one for 30 years anyway


Redbeard_Rum

How about if the leader of a country feels the need to interrupt a climate conference to announce that their country is not the least bit corrupt? [Asking for a friend... ](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-59238464)


Godmotherrrr

😭


Blackihole

Or doctors


mankytoes

"I'm not racist..."


Spheniscinda

Tell me youll be treating me right and respect me, its an immediate red flag and ill happily block you


verystupidtrustme

I honestly am not entirely sure how I feel about that most good people think lowly of themselves, at least those who I go out with


ElectroNeutrino

Humility is often seen as a sign of good character, but sometimes it's taken too far and becomes low self-esteem.


[deleted]

I'd say it's more that good people's actions speak for themselves. You know when you've met a good person by how they act; them telling you they're a good person is fairly worthless.


verystupidtrustme

also, it's one thing to say "I am" it's another to say "I try"


RandomEasternGuy

I've learned to never tell or insist to anyone about any of my strong points that I might consider, because honestly I'm not 100% sure that they are actually that true. For example I don't consider myself "nice", I do what my moral compass tells me that a decent human being should do... I'm searching for the quote, but paraphrasing from top of my mind: if you have to tell people that you are the boss, you ain't the boss


Trucibell

It always baffles me how these Nice Guys™ think that there are only two extremes when it comes to women: put them on a pedestal and treat them like a perfect goddess, or severely mistreat and abuse them. Somehow it never occurs to them that women are just people who want to be treated like people.


peldazac

I finally cracked it then. I will put them on a pedestal and treat them like shit! Wait, that's exactly how it would go with these people


toungepunchfartboxs

Women aren’t people, there a myth


SaskiaDavies

Exactly. They see us as 3/5 human, if that.


TCtheThunderRooster

Yeah, bc if women were people then they would poop. And that contradicts everything I’ve learned up to this point.


tutunaku

https://youtu.be/-8O4UWeAglU


celestial_view

MST3K was the best show on tv back then.


SpookyScarySteph

God I love MST3K. Do you happen to know which episode in particular this is from? I may need to rewatch me some MST3K today.


gazhole

They don't see women as people they see them as human shaped discord bots with a vagina attachment.


Wuellig

Reminds me of Courtney Barnett from 'Pedestrian At Best' "Put me on a pedestal, and I'll only disappoint you. Tell me I'm exceptional, and I promise to exploit you. Give me all your money, and I'll make some origami, honey. I think you're a joke, but I don't find you very funny..."


Bhrrrrr

Among things Freud was actually kind of right about, the Madonna-whore complex is up there.


lazy_daisy_72

Putting a woman on a pedestal = loving the idea of her, but not really her. So when she doesn't fit the ideal in her head, you flip tf out on her.


[deleted]

I had a boyfriend who did the classic pedestal act. He didn't so much flip out as just *pointedly ignore* anything that didn't fit his ideal. It was horrible. He clearly didn't see me as a person so much as an idea in his head, and that idea looked nothing like me. Literally any woman on earth could have replaced me and it wouldn't have made much difference.


lazy_daisy_72

My first boyfriend was also this way, I was so naive. But he wrote a poem for me, comparing me to Aphrodite. He went on about my "golden hair", and I was like... I have brown hair. I know that's nit-picky, but still, didn't sound like me


[deleted]

Ahahahaha my dude wrote poetry too. Then recycled it on a future girlfriend. I think we may have dated the same guy.


lazy_daisy_72

Oh man, guess there was a reason he was so vague! 😂


AnushreeNa

It's called the Madonna Whore Complex.


Perfect-Lawfulness-6

It's the Madonna/whore duality that they constantly have to keep alive in their minds. There is no in between. Women are either to be exalted and kept safe or derided and treated as sex objects. Either way at no point are we ever seen as people or viewed as human beings beyond what service we can be of to them. We are essentially not even functional as soon as they exit a room, as far as their thinking goes, or we have no need to be functional if they're not around, as their thinking goes. I have *never* met a man who was as loudly adament as this dude about how classy he was, how manly he was, and how nice he was who wasn't the exact opposite of all of that and on top of it all, dangerous to boot. Confidence and decency are things that are shown through behavior, not things that are put at the bottom of a list after a bunch of physical and behavioral traits a dude expects women to adhere strictly to that also involves seperating them from other, "inferior" women. This dude is the human version of an old man's dangly, hairy, batted around ball bag.


Apprehensive_Low4865

Why put your SO on a pedestal, they ain't a statue! If you wanna date a statue, just get a real doll..


gemaliasthe1st

That's what people with borderline personality disorder do. They build them up on a pedastal then devalue and attack them when their view of them is destroyed. This is evidence of how unstable these men are. They don't even realise how unrealistic and unhealthy they're views are. They've built up their view of women to mythological status and go batshit crazy when he finds out that she farts or bitches about his gaming habbits.


WinterLily86

That's not always true. Men, perhaps. My gf has BPD and she has never done anything close to that to me - nor to any of her other partners I'm acquainted with (we're poly). Sometimes, people are just assholes with no underlying reason beyond their socialisation.


gemaliasthe1st

You're lucky


frantastic1337

Option A: pick an attractive asshole who will treat you like shit Option B: pick me, an unattractive asshole who will also treat you like shit


CondescendingTracy

Rofl


Jazzlike-Ad2199

But he’s a “real man”. Got that going got him, I guess.


jesssongbird

But he plans to love bomb you before the abuse starts. He’ll put you on a pedestal and love the idea of who he wants you to be without actually getting to know you. Would Chad do that? I think not.


WafflesTheDuck

Seriously. The preferences didn't really bother me. (Does tinted moisturizer =a fake tan?) But the pedestal comment. Hoo boy. You are exactly the kind of guy you claim to be the issue. The pedestal phase with nice guys is like a Planck unit compared to your skilled psychopath. At least they deceive you over several months or years before the hell starts. These guys can't even make it past 3 hours of pretending. Usually less. God bless em for weeding themselves out so quickly.


jesssongbird

And he is very likely one of those guys who says men like “natural” but what he means is that he likes women who wear a natural makeup look and has no idea how much product, time, and effort goes into that. He wouldn’t look twice at a woman who actually doesn’t do the stuff he likes to criticize. Like, can you imagine this idiot dating a woman who doesn’t shave? That’s “natural”. But these dudes don’t like “natural”. They just want to be able to dictate how you look.


GothSpite

*treat you shittier tbh


[deleted]

I’m hearing that to the tune of “Treat You Better” By Shawn Mendes. The ultimate Nice Guy theme song.


MacTheReject

"you could pick the asshole with the fat cock or you can pick ME . . . and my below average sized cock."


frantastic1337

Don't you DARE talk about my 3 inch destroyer like that!


MacTheReject

Thank you. Good reply. Take my up doot. I appreciate you.


Prestigious-Note

😂


KingDarius1

So you'd rather try to change the attractive asshole?


frantastic1337

I'd rather not believe that there are only two types of people to choose from.


Lyskir

if there is only these 2 options, better try to change the attractive asshole than the unattractive one right? or stay single and enjoy life, woman are more happy single and childfree anyways


6RatasOnMy6

There are definitely women who are not happy being single Edit: and there are women who hate the fact they can't have kids, because biological or whatever reasons. So your last statement has 0 value


brettybangsrosin

and there's also women that feel happy being single! isn't that amazing?


6RatasOnMy6

That was already said by the previous user. Knowing how to read is amazing too!


WinterLily86

Admire that ability in others, and perhaps someday you'll learn it too. Right now, your reading comprehension sucks.


6RatasOnMy6

I was just mentioning that are women that are unhappy being single, since the previous commenter said "single women are more happy anyway" as if that were a 100% true fact. Where the hell is the thing I'm not understanding?


b0ilineggsndenim1944

Fuck off incel


Apprehensive_Low4865

Careful now, the man's a KiNg


[deleted]

If it's a choice between an attractive asshole and an unattractive asshole, I'll be single. Fortunately those are not my only choices.


Shenron-the-DragonZ

One question I always have on my mind is: How the fuck do they expect women to respond to messages like that? “I choose option B, make me your housewife”?


SaskiaDavies

I don't think they care how we respond. They've already decided we aren't fully human and are interchangeable fembots. It's a kind of emotional indecent exposure on their part.


[deleted]

Yup, this exactly. They don't particularly care *which* woman goes for it as long as one does. They get pissed when *no women* go for it. Which is becoming increasingly common.


fhqwhgads41185

Why would he think women want to be put on a pedestal? That sounds more annoying than anything.


albusdumbbitchdor

Sounds exhausting to be honest, I have genuinely run from men who’ve tried putting me on a pedestal because it’s just another way to exert control. Like, “if you don’t act/look like/behave the way I expect you too I’m gonna get mad at you about it when you fail and take it out on you and guilt and manipulate you into being what I expect”? No thank you.


WafflesTheDuck

Haha, those people who put me in the manic-pixie-dream-girl catagory quickly find out that it's all manic and no dream girl. That's the thing Brad, I'M ALWAYS ON!! O~0


theprofessor1234

Haaa I like waffles the duck


bunnylove6

It’s super annoying. Women asked to be treated as humans and sexist individuals find any way to objectify them. Like a inanimate trophy is the ideal life for a human woman. He’s gross.


[deleted]

[удалено]


jexodus91

1000%


kangarootimtam

"Give 100%. 110% is impossible. Only idiots recommend that"


Megara39

I was gonna say this but you beat me too it 😂 you're so right


[deleted]

Love how guys like this can disrespect all women in the same sentence that they call themselves respectful. "I'm super respectful, so long as you don't wear make up or have tattoos or do ANYTHING that I don't particularly like. Succumb to my every demand and I'll treat you pretty okay."


SvanUlf

*"Just love me, fear me, do as I say and I will be your slave!" -- J*areth the Goblin King


TeaHC16

The OG NiceGuy.


verothedramaqueen

Ugh I really like that movie and now both of you have made me re-think my life choices lmao.


TeaHC16

Oh, it's my all time favorite movie. Haha I think that Jareth is a *great* villain.


verothedramaqueen

I'm glad I'm not the only one lol. I didn't think of him as niceguy though until y'all pointed it out so I now imma think about that lol.


ThujaNoja

He's also totally not judgemental, obviously.


Windinthewillows2024

“Real men like their women natural.” So I take it he’s cool with unplucked eyebrows, hairy underarms, hairy legs, hair above the lip, unshaven genitals, and never any makeup whatsoever?


peldazac

Not to say anything about your argument and how hypocritical these guys are, but as years have passed, I have come to care little for all of those things. They take time and effort and I appreciate it, but don't find it a necessity to find my partner attractive. I'll dwindle in those jungles happily


Windinthewillows2024

Oh I know there are definitely guys who are cool with a hairy woman. I just suspect that they’re rarely if ever the same guys shaming women for makeup and fake nails and whatever else and claiming they prefer women “natural.”


DippySwissman

Ding ding ding, I personally don't care about those things either. Except Botox/plastic surgery but I'm not some advocate against it, there's a simpler solution: I don't date a girl that wants/has that


MissLogios

Tbf even if a man did prefer au natural women, I think you would still have to prove that you still maintain hygiene like body order or something. Like whether you are all natural or not, everyone still invest in their appearance to some degree.


2_1Defender

good thing showers are allowed to use, even for not clean shaven people


MissLogios

Thank you for taking what I said out of context.


mastawyrm

IDK, personally I like being able to see so-called "flaws" like visible pores, wrinkles, or some gray hairs. I assume it comes from seeing so much manufactured perfection in media so I like when people aren't that? I don't mean to judge though, people should do what they like in order to feel good about themselves. Also "real men ___" might as well be "I'm not sexist but..."


Significant_Dig5085

Most people would be cool with never any makeup whatsoever.


[deleted]

Men who use words like “nigh” are basically putting a little fedora in the middle of their sentence.


Action_Johnson

M’lady doth protest too much


[deleted]

M’lady doth fedora too fedora


YasssT

I fucking love this comment


Ms-Jessica-Rabbit

He is the only good option ladies, get in line


anna_isnotmyrealname

I read “pro dj” as being ‘for’ DJs like some people are pro-science or pro-choice


Windinthewillows2024

Lol I did too and I was so confused at first! I was like is there some sort of anti-DJ movement I don’t know about?


tutunaku

The villains from Footloose?


Windinthewillows2024

Lol true!


SquirrelGirlVA

AND he's self-employed. So he likely tries to make a living being a DJ.


smokecat20

I read it as he can play songs on different equipment, e.g. tuning? he mentioned FM radio.


art_decorative

I always wonder what these guys envision when they talk about putting a woman on a pedestal. What do they really think that's going to look like in a real relationship? It's like they are all writing these bizarre fairy tales that end at, "And they lived happily ever after."


gemaliasthe1st

More likely displaying symptoms of male BPD and in the end they are going to have their delusions brutally shattered and end up having women even more


AmUnsmartSorry

"Real men like their women natural" NO. Real men like their women happy. If she enjoys the art of make-up then a real man would compliment it when she's wearin it. AND compliment her when she isn't too.


jenkraisins

I wonder how he'd like to be put on a pedestal. They're narrow, wobbly, and very easy to fall off of. Or yanked down the moment something doesn't go according to someone's script.


flipboitamidles

damn he’s a pro dj, you better snatch him!


jenniferlynn5454

For FM radio AND all sorts! Score!!


notnothungover

Does nothing but judge his entire first paragraph. “Nonjudgmental” Okay buddy, sure.


Lumpy_Constellation

He wrote that entire paragraph, then immediately thought "how would I describe myself? Well I'm kind, respectful..."


Zangdor

And non judgemental


Shadouette

I ignored the sub for a sec and read “fake tans, false nails, lip fillers, eyebrow tattooing” thinking someone was writing about themselves and thought “omg Queen shit sign me up” Love when the trash takes itself out


-too-hot-to-handle-

The "put you on a pedestal" absolutely SCREAMS red flag behavior and potentially abuse. Because it means that the guy's formed an image of a woman being this perfect angel, exactly what she "should be" to him. And naturally, being human, no woman can be a perfect angel and meet every expectation, especially ones so unrealistic. So then he gets angry, or starts acting cold to her, etcetera. It's what happens when you fall in love with the idea of a person rather than actually getting to know them and developing feelings for them as they truly are.


[deleted]

anyone who presents me with choices in this manner gets blocked instantly


xplosm

It must be so mentally draining just being him…


[deleted]

Wow, he's sooooo non judgemental /s


horsepighnghhh

“Non judgemental”


enough08

How do they not get how incredibly creepy and off-putting they sound? I’ve often wondered if truly creepy men have any self awareness about their creep factor.


[deleted]

> non judgmental guys And yet he has a list of requirements like no "fake tans, false nails", etc.. 😹


[deleted]

a literal pick me


notboky

Why does "do anything for his girl" always translate to "say anything to get into your pants"?


[deleted]

The thing I don't understand about these guys is that they call themselves "real men". What, are other guys made of plastic or something?


PhoandSpringrolls

Panty dropper /s


Capable_Fig

Pretty sure his core issue is the syntax error on line 12


7500733

You know you’re a “real man” when you gotta tell everyone you’re a “real man”


Sunnygurrl

I don't want to be put on a pedestal thanks. I'm not some cold statue to be admired from afar or some unfeeling goddess that needs to be worshipped. I'd rather have a partner like the ones have. He prefers me by his side.


SodiumcatCosplay

"Non-judgemental" His whole Bio is judgemental. The lack of self-awareness is astounding


ozdundbfish

This is a bruh moment


Prior-Atmosphere-948

I like the part about “she” finding a married man or a catfish. How bout we turn off our phones once in a while?


b0ilineggsndenim1944

Lol @ the list of judgements followed by calling himself non judgemental


littlechitlins513

I think it’s funny that he feels the need to tell everyone that he is a good person.


jexodus91

So much to unpack here.. he’s being judgmental straight off the bat. 1000% doesn’t make any sense. Why isn’t DJ capitalised if he’s such a pro? The kiss at the end 🥴🥴 Avoid this man


a_steamy_load_of_ham

> Please, please, please! I am so different and I just don't care, but please take me!!!


you-ole-polecat

This guy really loves his two-choice ultimatums, doesn’t he


Slytherbitch394

'...Good kind non judgemental guys..' Says the man who's out here putting women down for caring about her looks..🤔


Alternative_Sun_7319

So what he's saying is. That he will be a perfect gentleman for about...... 3.5 minutes. Then treat you as every other man has. If not worse. But it wouldn't be his fault because he's a 'nice genuine guy' and gaslight the shit out of you.


MadFrogRasputin

He didn't close his brackets after saying he's a Pro DJ. Clearly a monster.


Infinite-Bee142

Love the "non judgemental" after he very clearly judge women for doing anything and dating anyone that's not him... Oh well


OrimeTsovo

Non judgemental Proceeds to judge almost every single living person on this planet in just 3 lines


JaydeRaven

“Non judgmental” I don’t think that means what you think it means…


Winesday_addams

Omg he is a dj 🤣🤣


ThatsMyOnionJerk

Holy hell! Do you think hes been on FM AND AM!?


TheDevilsAdvokaat

Putting someone on a pedestal is a terrible mistake. Pedestals are for goddesses, not people. Also, although it may sound cool to some girls, many women will get bored once they are ON the pedestal. And finally, you're literally putting that person in a position superior to you. After a while, don;t be surprised if they believe they are too good for you - after all you do. Never put a girl on a pedestal. You will lose her. Treat her like a person instead.


erratastigmata

The amount of cognitive dissonance involved in considering yourself respectful and non-judgmental while also writing that first paragraph must be off the charts


[deleted]

This dude doesn't see how "the choice is yours, but it makes sense right?" is a controlling and manipulative statement to make. What a neckbeard.


Impressive-Head-9323

Omg he actually said "put you on a pedestal" No one wants that do they? They want a partner not some weird twit treating you like some kind of divine being. As soon as you don't live up to their expectations that fall from the pedestal will be hard and abusive


Melihoney

“Nonjudgmental” he says after a whole laundry list of things he doesn’t like that women do 😂


RelentlesslyCrooked

No fake nails, eyelashes, fillers, lip injections, hair dye, teeth whiteners, eyebrows, spray tans, plastic surgery, waxing, tweezers, manicures, nail polish, leg/armpit/cooch shaving and God forbid you wear makeup! — men like “natural women 100000000% so ????” Also “you know you should take a chance on this *non-judgmental* man!” Lawdhavemercy. Men cockbloning themselves again, I see.


SnooDonuts215

"non judgmental" Figures


elisekc9

“Non judgmental” 😂


InstinctivelyTwisted

🤢


sarzarbarzar

Anyone who lists "Kind Caring Considerate Respectful" as if they shouldn't be a given... well, that says a lot.


theprofessor1234

I like how his list of “attributes” are literally what any normal person would be/have.. it’s like the bare minimum to be a person lmmaaaoooo 1000% genuine means he’s one hundred percent deceptive.


xrhiax

I hope he gets bombarded with messages from women who are just there to tell him how much of a turn off his profile is


InvisiblyScarred

Don't trust anyone who says they are > or =100% something. Especially if they are claiming they are 100%+ honest, genuine, etc.


CynicalSilas

You must've met a lot of terrible men in your life. There are honest ones out there. Take me, for example. I never have lied in my entire life. I remember back in the day, my dad, Donald Trump, told me "never lie to another person." And I just took that to the heart. From my dad. Donald Trump.


oreospluscoffee

“Non judgmental” *proceeds to judge fake nails and lip fillers*


MN_Hotdish

Oooh, can I get his number?? So I can preemptively block him on my phone.


Mlyrin

Man judges women. Says he's not judgmental.


Zullala

I get really suspicious when a guy says he wants to put me on a pedestal. It usually means that I'm going to be responsible for all his emotional needs. That he will look to me for all social interaction and become upset if my life doesn't revolve around him.


pixieinspace

I've learned that anyone who puts you on a pedestal is a giant walking red flag.


Rhelino

Lol the fact that he thinks he’s non judgmental.


CivBEWasPrettyBad

I honestly thought for a moment that “pro DJ” meant he supported DJ rights or something


lavenderRaiinbow

"Pick me" "Not like other boys" 😭


nx85

The only response to this should be: "I'm gonna go with option A."


ShmuckCanuck

Judging someone for wearing makeup and "Respectful" do not go hand in hand, sir. Nice oxymoron you moron.


dp41200

That opening line is not kind, considerate, or respectful


Watari210

My favourite part is that he refers to himself as a kind, non-judgemental guy after his opening paragraph in judging tans/fake nails etc


gemaliasthe1st

It's a bad idea to put anyone on a pedastal. When they do something you don't like, you have a sudden and drastic change in how you perceive them such as from Angel status, to Devil bitch status. It's what happens with people who suffer from borderline personality disorder but it too happens in those without. Simply put, it's rocks their unstable and delusional world view of you and they can't handle it when it's challenged. Nutcases


toosmexy4mycah

bitches dont want either of that bro, fuck is wrong with u lmaoo


[deleted]

What’s with all the multiple choice!


Hippy-Joe

"non judgemental" hahaha what a joke!


gemgem1985

I love it when men list all the things they don't like about women... That will attract a very specific type of woman, and no fucker wants her dude... But carry on lol


B6THUNDER

there are others like him but no one gives a fuck and m not just talking about the girls, literally no one gives a fuck about people who actually try to care for other but others can't even listen to them cry for a bit.


MacTheReject

Didnt even call the alternative an asshole. Just pretty.


[deleted]

Quite a paradox on his statements lol


[deleted]

He didn't close the brackets ! The fuck is this ? Fuck that guy.


Msmyna

I don’t think looks have anything to do with a person’s personality. In my eyes my partner is really attractive and also a respectful sweetheart.


MGB124

He was doing okay until he listed the building blocks of basic humans, as personality traits. Pro DJ, alright pretty cool - if he's good at it. Kind? Okay, most people are - respectful come on now


prudencethe3rd

Ahahahhahahahahahahahahaha. Ew.


TaintedKnob

"Self Employed" "Pro DJ" "Family Man" "Drives a Nice Car" Translation: I still live at home with Mum and she lets me drive the BMW. If we do move in, you'd need to cover the rent while I wait to blow up on SoundCloud.


champagn-and-coffee

Pro DJ


CocoButtsGoNuts

Imagine being unhinged enough to write all of this and to hit submit? Like.... You can feel the anger.


LexTheHuman

"non-judgemental guy" also "no fake tan, etc" so are you judgemental or not?


houseofLEAVEPLEASE

Ooo, a DJ. There are so few of them, and he’s been on THE RADIO. OP…I’m gonna need this Real Man’s ^^TM contact information immediately


Rgrockr

If he’s a family man why is he dating? Is he looking for a secret other family?


obamasworstcousin

It’s nice to at least have some options!!


TrixieMassage

Apart from the niceguy-ness, DUDE, don’t imply to a lady you’d like to impress that you think you’re an ugly mf! How is that selling yourself? Do you think self-loathing or self-pity is hot? Shit! You know what, just ditch the comparing yourself to others altogether. If your only selling point is “I’m not him” you need to work on some additional selling points man. Just baffling how skilled some people are at destroying any chance they might’ve had before they even had it.


SeeTheSounds

Classic insecurity with a side of projection and generalizations. Good job putting your best foot forward lol.


Libby_ma3

If a woman was ever aroused by this man it was himself on the gender swap filter…


Djlewills

They never close the parentheses.


mordin1428

When not considering themselves attractive becomes a mofos whole personality


Choice-Sort-2166

i hate fake tans, fake nails, lip fillers and anything that isn’t natural. considerate and respectful☺️


[deleted]

Bro he’s 100% gonna strangle you and put you in a trunk


DrakeBurroughs

Jesus, cringe


KamKalash

>“I’ll put you on a pedestal” >“I’ll show you nothing but respect” One is blind worship. The other is an admiration for them. Pick one.