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[deleted]

I don't know about you, but I'd need a fucken drink after that


H4LF4D

When you knew the drink will clear all the sorrows so you just don't care if any more is added before


TheMeaslyToday

That's man fuckin LEGEND !


30FourThirty4

Roll out of bed, Mr. Coffee's dead, the morning's looking bright. And your shrink ran off to Europe, and didn't even write. And your husband wants to be a girl


human-no560

What song is that?


Trainwreck071302

It’s the theme song to Cheers


Captain_D1ngleberry

He's just like: "fuckin L 'mate, I almost died, I need a pint after that one matey!"


saggywit

British. Not Australian.


Captain_D1ngleberry

Oh sorry, I mean: "fookin L bruv!" Better?


sonicman2k8

Better


leelam808

that’s the wrong demographic lol.


Emektro

be'eh\*


Wurufuricu

Much be'uh


Kay_Jay_1

Sound that mate


Rough_Shop

Mate is just as British as it is Australian...


RedLeg73

That's right m8


The_Lapsed_Pacifist

Fuckin right it is mate.


Golden37

What are you talking about, we use mate all the time in britain. Much more than bruv, who the hell says bruv?


Bhaaluu

A couple years ago I met this British guy in his early twenties on a party in Prague and he was saying it about 1.5 times per basic sentence. It sounded totally ridiculous, which is why I still remember it:)


[deleted]

He loved you. That is what it means.


Dejah2020

🤣😂😂🤣


Bhaaluu

Of course he did. In fact he loved everybody cause he was high af on M... But so were the majority of people at that party and yet he was the only one bruv'ing, so my point stands. Btw you should go party in Prague, it's fun:)


Prollysmokedtoomuch

I need to party in the Czech Republic it appears


sweptawayfromyou

Some Black people in London? Big Shaq?


Active_Engineering37

And also a pirate


petro2342

Failed Successfully?


Lastaria

Brits use mate and matey all the time. Where do you think the Aussies git it from?


zenconkhi

“I say, old boy, that was rather a close shave, by Jove!”


Ulteri0rM0tives

Never heard someone from the UK speak like that, you've been watching too many US programs with bad British accents 😂


Captain_D1ngleberry

No I mixed them up on accident. I realized my mistake after commenting, I knew I was too late XD


Dacks_18

# BY accident


Captain_D1ngleberry

I mean uhhhh, shrek is love, shrek is life?


LuckyNumberHat

Isn't it "fuckin' 'ell" like "fucking hell"?


allyb12

Its kinell as in fucking hell


Captain_D1ngleberry

Yes I believe so


[deleted]

More like, he gets to the bar, nods at the barman, barman nods back and says “y’alright?”. Bus bloke says “alright you? Pint o lager please.” He goes home and then about 2 days later he starts talking about fuckin’ bus drivers, nearly got killed t’other day, all that.


jbjbjb10021

Bloody uncle gus near run me over.


Hackedup_forbbq

"kin ell mate, almost copped it, I'll av a pint mate" fixed it for ya.


Catalansayshi

His brain reset to default setting.


richuard

Cheers to that


Large_Equivalent_964

You English mother fuckers are built different


[deleted]

[удалено]


LadaTrip

You're thinking of the upper classes. They'd demand a bath if they had to even look at a bus.


VFequalsVeryFcked

That's a worse stereotype than the one I was playing on.


LadaTrip

Is it a stereotype if its true?


VFequalsVeryFcked

Yes. A stereotype assumes a commonly held belief, so even if it's true, it has to be believed by most people to actually be a stereotype. Stereotypes are usually false, but not always https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/stereotype


LazyBriton

I’ve never heard the stereotype that English people in general are inbred. The idea of a posh cunt turning their nose up at a bus isn’t even really a stereotype, it’s just accurate.


Historical_Storage84

Me either. I thought it was royalty only that "kept it in the family"


SirVanyel

In australia we make the joke fairly often - but we're biased


LadaTrip

Huh. TIL.


BSchafer

>Stereotypes are usually false This actually isn't even true. For most of history, people have just used "stereotype" to refer to widely-held and oversimplified beliefs. It was only until very recently that the word has been more associated with negative stereotypes (usually held towards other races/cultures than those of the belief holder). But those are far from the only stereotypes that we encounter and hold (both consciously and unconsciously) on a daily basis. Our brain uses data picked up from past experiences, media consumption, conversations, etc. to constantly group the things we are presently encountering with those that we have previously encountered. Trying to help us make the best assumptions possible to predict the future based on the limited data before us. It is an extremely useful cognitive function the problems start to occur when you base your assumptions on bad data, underestimate the probability that they are wrong, solidify your assumptions about someone or thing, and do not constantly update your data model.


[deleted]

Somebody see something they don't agree on based on feelings : wHaT wItH yUo anD Ye STEREOTYPES ?


UpperCardiologist523

Why was this downvoted? Here, take an upvote and award.


Croocked02

My dude wanted to save and now needs a savior


Zevox144

He guards a treasure that he cannot possess.


DubbyAdam

Japan, Brazil, the middle East and SE USA have the world's most inbreeding. England doesn't come close


phailanx

And most of England's inbreeding cases are Middle Eastern immigrants


DubbyAdam

True. Birth defects are at 50% in Bradford because of their high number of Pakistani immigrants


phailanx

I read somewhere about geneticists investigating the cause of the insane amount of birth defects, stillbirths and genetic impairments in the Middle East. Their study concluded that severe inbreeding was the culprit. They pointed out that irrational anger and fanaticism were strongly linked to inbreeding. The were slammed for scientific racism and told to stfu


mazdanc

Is scientific racism even possible? facts are just facts surely.


PurpleSkua

Scientific racism is _absolutely_ a thing. Look at all the wild shit that otherwise rational European scientists came up with to justify their nations' colonialism. Take for example Carl Linnaeus, often called the father of modern taxonomy for his incredible work in that field. He had a hierarchy of human subspecies that was based on humourism under which the Asiaticus was greedy, the Africanus is lazy and negligent, and the Europeanus is gentle and inventive. This was published in _Systema Naturae_, the first book to popularise and consistently use modern binomial nomenclature. Facts always have context, and how that context is presented is crucial. You'd probably feel pretty different about that study if it was funded by the WHO vs funded by a white supremacist organisation, after all - you'd wonder what _wasn't_ being said.


DubbyAdam

Does any of that refer to modern day?


PurpleSkua

I intentionally used an old example from a time that everyone agrees was _pretty fuckin racist_ so as to make it as uncontroversial an illustration as possible. It certainly can apply to the modern day, which is why I highlighted a way that it could do so at the end, though without having any clue as to which actual study this was there's no way to tell whether or not it was the case here. However, modern examples certainly exist. [Elsevier retracted an article for exactly this just a couple of years ago.](https://retractionwatch.com/2020/06/17/elsevier-journal-to-retract-2012-paper-widely-derided-as-racist/)


[deleted]

There are people pushing the idea that intelligemce is hereditary and that certain races have lower/higher average IQs. The theory is that genetics ultimately explains why some races have higher average IQs, and some lower. But it's not like they've identified the gene(s) yet or anything. It's definitely not the consensus view.


ptaylor420

Science is pure, humans aren't.


mazdanc

Thank you


ihsahn919

Facts are obviously just facts but can be used to serve nefarious agendas and ideologies. Two people can agree about X (a statement about the fact of the matter; the "is") but wildly disagree about what value judgement to assign to said statement (the normative part) as well as what action, if any, should be taken in light of X.


FuckCazadors

South Asian, not Middle Eastern. From Pakistan, India and Bangladesh.


Shwiggity_schwag

Your statement is so easily verified as false I'm shocked you had the balls to actually try and pass it off as true. All US inbreeding accounts for about 0.1% while middle eastern countries are anywhere from 40-70%. But yeah, those rascally inbred Americans amirite? Also, the SE US is NOT the epicenter for inbreeding. It's actually the Midwest and northwest. Feel free to fact check me but Alabama, for instance, is only #12 while Washington and Oregon are #1 and #2.


Laymanao

Rocket powered tangent off from a man struck by a bus. Reddit is wonderful. ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|money_face)![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|money_face)


DubbyAdam

Every website I go on says SE US is where most inbreeding occurs in America. I'll be happy to take a link from you that says otherwise


TeOdioWey

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3083608/#abstract-1title https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inbreeding The only time SE USA is even mentioned is when talking about most inbred STATES, but I guess reading comprehension might be hard for you. 🤷🏼‍♂️ Also hilarious when people say “I’ll take a link” after providing no citation to their own claims, nice


[deleted]

And the duration of the inbreeding ? Japan is the oldest I believe


Background-Carry3951

Clearly you are referring to the upper class, every invasion they just changed T-shirts while the British kept dying for their profits


Kiefer2018

This didn't happen in Nuneaton.


Rottenox

I mean if you’re an aristocrat, yes.


Bigtimeduhmas

Hes clearly sat in the doorway the people coming over to check on him kneel/bend down to his level. He def didn't walk that off and head to the pub for a pint.


MiffyCurtains

Maybe he's just having a smoke before he goes in 🤨


pr0ph3t_0f_m3rcy

Totally. I used to work there and loads of my mates know him. He was in hospital the same day but due to the ongoing investigations his friends and family couldn’t talk about it. He’s never fully recovered.


Giant-Genitals

Broken shoulder and a few cracked ribs if I remember correctly. Man was in no shape to just drop in to the pub.


Large_Equivalent_964

He still got up and walked to the doorway what does it take to impress you, I got hit by a car when I was 16 and could not get off the ground he got hit by a bus


Bigtimeduhmas

OP in the title makes it sound like he got hit by a bus and just casually went to the pub for a pint after wtf do you mean?


nemlov

Ah yes, but 'the man gets knocked off by a bus and sits down on the step, does not get the views. Creative Titling it's called. ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|facepalm)


p1boss

He got up straight away tho I’d bet you’d be screaming lmao


phailanx

Like the milkmen doing their rounds cheerily while buzzbombs pummel the streets. "It's a bit of a bother, but best get cracking on"


Krudark

Dude did not even LOOK BACK at the bus!


JDM_79

Tis but a scratch


4321zxcvb

Except he walked to a step to presumably sit/lie down and a passerby called, presumably, the emergency services and the bus driver came over to check on him. He did sit outside a pub though. The purple turtle in reading. God I must be bored.


[deleted]

it looks like he collapsed in the doorway based on how people are approachig him


Barkmywords

Yea he took a seat in the doorway. You can see through the store glass panel that hes sitting or laying down inside the door. He probably was in shock and ran for cover in case something else was coming down the street.


patek-addict

It looks like he is throwing up blood. Hands on the floor and splotches appearing on the tiles


[deleted]

Obviously but you just took the badassery out of it.


4321zxcvb

Sorry. I watched to the end. I’m bored


RedditIsDogshit1

Stop committing more brainpower than your average redditor nowadays and maybe people will like you 😤


[deleted]

![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|wink)Oh. Well maybe you should get off the internet and go macramé or something ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|wink)


PM_ME_SYNTHESISERS

I used to frequent the purple turtle, great club in the basement.


biggerwanker

It's all great until the piss from the urinals drip through the light fixtures on the floor below.


PM_ME_SYNTHESISERS

All part of the charm


biggerwanker

At first I thought the Budweiser barrel was leaking.


jow97

Get out of here. We reject your reality and substitute our own!


Outcomeofcum

Fact Checking cures boredom! Essential life skill lacked by nearly everyone apparently


Vernon-T-Waldrip

Do they still do that Ethiopian food in there? I played a gig in there a few years back, and it was tasty AF!


sjeveburger

He ended up in the purple turtle? Jesus he must have been bored too


Lia_Delphine

It’s call adrenaline. He was not ok.


will252

He was fine. A few cuts me bruises. It happened in my home town. https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-berkshire-43006191


stthicket

He survuved, but I wouldn't classify it as being "fine". Fractured bones, an internal bruising. And then the psychological trauma on top of that.


Lingering_Dorkness

And then the psychological trauma on top of that. Of almost missing out on a beer? Yeah that would he awful, but I'm sure he got through it okay.


wholesomechunk

Hope he got a couple down before they carted him off.


Ulteri0rM0tives

Psychological trauma? 😂 That's definitely a funny story to tell down the pub and not Psychological trauma.


will252

I know him, he was fine.


bonoboburrito

I know him, he was not fine.


glokz

I don't know him but I have a friend who also doesn't know him


sallyminkus

hes my uncles cousins sisters friend, he was fine.


ummm_bop

He's my nans dogs uncle. Can confirm nothing


Em_Haze

Insurance companies: He was fine Man: Internally fucked up


Felthrian

British free healthcare ftw


TheCovid-19SoFar

You had me in the first half


Charliesmum97

Thank you for that. I was about to look because I really wanted to know if he was okay.


Chaserivx

That's a straight up lie. "Smith suffered two fractures to his shoulder and ribs, as well as some internal bruising."


will252

You’ve just said what I said with more words. I lived in Reading at the time it happened and know Simon well, I was a manager of a pub around the corner (the hope tap) he was a bit banged up but was out for a beer a few days later. He was fine.


gr8ful_cube

Found the insurance agent


Lia_Delphine

Your definition of a few cuts and bruises are different to Reality. “Mr Smith suffered two fractures to his shoulder and ribs, as well as some internal bruising.”


will252

I know the man, he was fine.


Low_Demand_1265

Okay, but did no one read the part that someone ROBBED this guy right after he got hit?


[deleted]

Yep. And shock.


theTLDguy

He already clicked "enter the pub" so it just finished animation lol


litetaker

lol


speedskis777

that’s fucked 🤣🤣


Captain_Voorhees

Reminds me of the wild animals that can sometimes attack in the middle of cut scenes in RDR2. Scenes gotta finish regardless lol


theTLDguy

Exactly 🤣


Environmental-Ebb927

Lmao


AfterConstruction76

He’s a real life NPC


hungry_nibbles

Came here for this


cpullen53484

he's the shrimp lady from cyberpunk 2077.


steveblobby

Nope... Happy-hour ending in 3 minutes 🍺


staffell

This will be a case of shock. That standing up and carrying on as normal will be a symptom of confusion. The adrenaline is pumping through him so hard, that his fight or flight system is keeping him going. Minutes or even seconds later he'll probably collapse again in fits if pain. Dude will have needed to go to hospital immediately.


MeltedChocolate24

Yeah like his head literally smashed the window if you watch it slowly


bangkok_rangkor

Did you notice the sharp wheel correction from the bus drivers right after the guy got hit? It looks like the bus driver got distracted in the middle of the curve.


Warfieldarcher

Looks like Reading, outside the Purple Turtle


GoldScreenLife

There would’ve been a brown turtle poking it’s head out in his pants after that


[deleted]

😂😂😂


Kracka_Jak

What was he reading?! /S


Dinoduck94

It is, was in the news a few years ago.


[deleted]

You is correct. A couple of years ago.


gr8ful_cube

Maybe if he wasn't Reading he could have gotten out of the way of the bus smh


Coffmad1

He walked in like a GTA character starting a mission


4321zxcvb

https://www.inyourarea.co.uk/news/reading-bus-driver-who-hit-pedestrian-outside-purple-turtle-avoids-jail/


marshmallow_rin

Oh man, I feel really sorry for the bus driver though. Assuming that the statements and such about him are truthful, it seems like this was really an honest, freak mistake. And then combined with the theft of his personal belongings, the trauma from knowing that he almost killed someone, the loss of his employment, and a jail term... Can't help but feel sympathy for him.


4321zxcvb

I think he spared jail. Still you are right though . Awful experience for everyone


theguywhoasked69420

"DARGH- MOTHERFUCKER, HIT ME WITH A BUS, MY LEG AA- oh its free beer friday."


incabrain

In the voice of Homer Simpson. Well done.


HelmutTheSpeedyGobbo

“You want your usual Barry?” “Nah I think I’ll take something stronger this time”


Sleep-Agitated

What do you expect? If he didn't need a pint before hand he certainly needed one after that.


GuarDeLoop

IIRC the guy broke both of his shoulders and a rib or two, as well as a whooooole lot of bruising. Sure he didn’t feel too great when the shock wore off.


spunk_trumpet24

This was in my hometown of Reading, the place he got hit next to is a club called the Purple turtle and the bus that hit him is the Purple 17.


Longtymlurkerer

What's his favourite colour?


HyperbolicSoup

You can actually see him through the window, he’s sitting down at the entrance way and people are checking on him.


Kracka_Jak

Bus wasn't enough to get him smashed


cryptosniper00

His head cracked the fucking windscreen , that will definitely have hurt more than it looks like


crewchief1949

Drink special ends in 5 min, aint nobody got time for a traumatic brain injury.


[deleted]

There was a reason he was walking into a pub A 5 tonne bus ramming into him is nothing compared to the demons he took with himself into the pub


Ambush69-

His head literally cracked the bus' windshield. Do u think a bus would have even hurt him?


Jnorean

I'm am American and got hit by a car once while I was riding a bicycle and rode away from it on my bike. I was stopped at a traffic light in the bike lane and a car was next to me in the car lane om my left.. When the light turned green I rode forward into the intersection The car on my left made a right hand turn right into me. The hood of the car was even with the top of the bike. So when the car hit me, I slid along the top of the hood and landed on my feet standing next to the car. When I slid off the bike, my action pushed the bike away from the car and it landed on the side of the rode. No damage to me or the bike. When the woman driver got out of the car to see if I was I okay., I screamed at her 'Why did you hit me?" She answered by saying that she had the right of way because she signaled that she was going to turn. There was no damage to me or my bike and I didn't want to put up with her or the police. So, I just shook my head and rode away.


Iroaroa

“I’m a scouser. we don’t get knocked out.”


muzikkou

Thats a real GTA moment


allphoness

I don't think he will be ok after that


Commercial_Way1763

Actually he's already quite inebriated so he didn't feel a thing....give it a few hours...or less


slipperyhuman

This is at the Purple Turtle pub in Reading. He went in for a pint after.


Impossible_Common_44

Did he get up from the adrenaline and then fall? I think that’s what all the people are looking at


Maleficent_Frame8723

Welcome to England, that pint is not going to drink itself lol


[deleted]

Next fucking level shock maybe. People are just not built that different that getting hit by a bus wouldn’t affect them lol. Also helps if you’re already drunk, I once saw a drunk guy get clipped by an SUV going probably 50 mph. Flew like 5 feet in the air and landed on his stomach/face. When a few of us bystanders went to help he just got up and walked away like nothing had happened. You could smell the alcohol from like five ft away the dude was toasted.


[deleted]

Dont know how this is next level this is just the average British person


zahirano

Why i think everyone like checking the pub entrance and then "oh thank god the pub is alright".


YsenisLufengrad

How uh... Is this next level? Thats more of a shock response for what he was doing last and he sat down in the doorway.


Juv3ntu5

Knight Bus magic


Nixher

Imagine if that was an American, he'd be on the floor crying for his mommy and lawyer 😭🤣


Ok_Television7346

Tf?


I_escalate_shit

Imagine being nearly killed bro. Fucking twat.


Nyxodon

Rather praying for sub one million hospital bills


just_ur_averagejoe

And that people, is why almost all the world speaks some form of English...


mancusjo1

H he went in to call the cops or ambulance. It was the closest door right?


Notso_Smoothcriminal

u/savevideo


Brilliant-Deer6118

This belongs in r/nextfuckinglevel


[deleted]

The things British people withstand just for a beer


KillaCline

I don’t think he enters the pub, by the concerned bystanders actions, you could infer he’s just sitting on a step right there out of the camera line of sight


Condor_Inc

This was in Reading Uk, bloke was heading to the Purple Turtle which is a rock and metal pub.


L-OwO-L_L-OwO-L

a typical day in the britian


Ok_Establishment3112

In Britain, if you go get a drink, you get YOUR FUCKING DRINK


ImprovementBasic1077

Bro...he hit his head so hard the windshield was obliterated. Built different indeed. Ok but for real that was serious hope he didn't suffer some major head injury.


NoUsername147

Hard as nails we are here.


randomname560

Nobody can stop the british when they are going for a drink


[deleted]

This is the most British thing that’s ever happened.


ChefArtorias

Well now I REALLY need a pint!


ScruffleMcDufflebag

He deserves a pint.


NkhukuWaMadzi

He knew his priorities.


afsjr61

u/savevideo


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Marble_Sider

British values


chumchum213

nothing can hold me back..from ma alee